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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Misery' ?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\n \"MISERY\"\r\n\r\n by\r\n\r\n William Goldman\r\n\r\n Based on the Novel by\r\n\r\n Stephen King\r\n\r\n \r\n\r\n FADE IN ON:\r\n\r\n A SINGLE CIGARETTE. A MATCH. A HOTEL ICE BUCKET that holds a \r\n bottle of champagne. The cigarette is unlit. The match is of \r\n the kitchen variety. The champagne, unopened, is Dom Perignon. \r\n There is only one sound at first: a strong WIND--\r\n\r\n --now another sound, sharper--a sudden burst of TYPING as we\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n PAUL SHELDON typing at a table in his hotel suite. It's really \r\n a cabin that's part of a lodge. Not an ornate place. Western \r\n themed.\r\n\r\n He is framed by a window looking out at some gorgeous \r\n mountains. It's afternoon. The sky is grey. Snow is scattered \r\n along the ground. We're out west somewhere. The WIND grows \r\n stronger--there could be a storm.\r\n\r\n PAUL pays no attention to what's going on outside as he \r\n continues to type.\r\n\r\n He's the hero of what follows. Forty-two, he's got a good \r\n face, one with a certain mileage to it. We are not, in other \r\n words, looking at a virgin. He's been a novelist for eighteen \r\n years and for half that time, the most recent half, a \r\n remarkably successful one.\r\n\r\n He pauses for a moment, intently, as if trying to stare a \r\n hole in the paper. Now his fingers fly, and there's another \r\n burst of TYPING. He studies what he's written, then--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PAPER, as he rolls it out of the machine, puts it on the \r\n table, prints, in almost childlike letters, these words:\r\n\r\n THE END\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A PILE OF MANUSCRIPT at the rear of the table. He puts this \r\n last page on, gets it straight and in order, hoists it up, \r\n folds it to his chest, the entire manuscript--hundreds of \r\n pages.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, as he holds his book to him. He is, just for a brief \r\n moment, moved.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A SUITCASE across the room. PAUL goes to it, opens it and \r\n pulls something out from inside: a battered red leather \r\n briefcase. Now he takes his manuscript, carefully opens the \r\n briefcase, gently puts the manuscript inside. He closes it, \r\n and the way he handles it, he might almost be handling a \r\n child. Now he crosses over, opens the champagne, pours himself \r\n a single glass, lights the one cigarette with the lone match--\r\n there is a distinct feeling of ritual about this. He inhales \r\n deeply, makes a toasting gesture, then drinks, smokes, smiles.\r\n\r\n HOLD BRIEFLY, then--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n LODGE - DAY\r\n\r\n PAUL--exiting his cabin. He stops, makes a snowball, throws \r\n it, hitting a sign.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Still got it.\r\n\r\n He throws a suitcase into the trunk of his '65 MUSTANG and, \r\n holding his leather case, he hops into the car and drives \r\n away.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A SIGN that reads \"Silver Creek Lodge.\" Behind the sign is \r\n the hotel itself--old, desolate. Now the '65 Mustang comes \r\n out of the garage, guns ahead toward the sign. As \"Shotgun\" \r\n by Jr. Walker and the Allstars starts, he heads off into the \r\n mountains.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SKY. Gun-metal grey. The clouds seem pregnant with snow.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, driving the Mustang, the battered briefcase on the \r\n seat beside him.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD AHEAD. Little dainty flakes of snow are suddenly \r\n visible.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CAR, going into a curve and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, driving, and as he comes out of the curve, a stunned \r\n look hits his face as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD AHEAD--and here it comes--a mountain storm; it's as \r\n if the top has been pulled off the sky and with no warning \r\n whatsoever, we're into a blizzard and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG, slowing, driving deeper into the mountains.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, squinting ahead, windshield wipers on now.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG, rounding another curve, losing traction--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, a skilled driver, bringing the car easily under control.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD\r\n\r\n Snow is piling up.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL driving confidently, carefully. Now he reaches out, \r\n ejects the tape, expertly turns it over, pushes it in and, \r\n as the MUSIC continues, he hums along with it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SKY. Only you can't see it.\r\n\r\n There's nothing to see but the unending snow, nothing to \r\n hear but the wind which keeps getting wilder.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD. Inches of snow on the ground now. This is desolate \r\n and dangerous.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, driving.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SNOW. Worse.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD, curving sharply, drop ping. A sign reads: \"Curved \r\n Road, Next 13 Miles.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG, coming into view, hitting the curve--no problem--\r\n no problem at all--and then suddenly, there is a very serious \r\n problem and as the car skids out of control--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, doing his best, fighting the conditions and just as it \r\n looks like he's got things going his way--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD, swerving down and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG, all traction gone and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, helpless and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG, skidding, skidding and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD as it drops more steeply away and the wind whips \r\n the snow across and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MUSTANG starting to spin and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MOUNTAINSIDE as the car skids off the road, careens down, \r\n slams into a tree, bounces off, flips, lands upside down, \r\n skids, stops finally, dead.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON THE CAR A MOMENT\r\n\r\n There is still the sound of the WIND, and there is still the \r\n music coming from the tape, perhaps the only part of the car \r\n left undamaged. Nothing moves inside. There is only the WIND \r\n and the TAPE. The wind gets louder.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WRECK looked at from a distance. The MUSIC sounds are \r\n only faintly heard.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE AREA WHERE THE WRECK IS--AS SEEN FROM THE ROAD. The car \r\n is barely visible as the snow begins to cover it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WRECK from outside, and we're close to it now, with the \r\n snow coming down ever harder--already bits of the car are \r\n covered in white.\r\n\r\n CAMERA MOVES IN TO\r\n\r\n PAUL. He's inside and doing his best to fight is, but his \r\n consciousness is going. He tries to keep his eyes open but \r\n they're slits.\r\n\r\n Slowly, he manages to reach out with his left arm for his \r\n briefcase--\r\n\r\n --and he clutches it to his battered body. The MUSIC continues \r\n on.\r\n\r\n But PAUL is far from listening. His eyes flutter, flutter \r\n again. Now they're starting to close.\r\n\r\n The man is dying.\r\n\r\n Motionless, he still clutches the battered briefcase.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON THE CASE. Then--\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n The BRIEFCASE in Paul's hands as he sits at a desk.\r\n\r\n SINDELL (O.S.)\r\n What's that?\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n We are in New York City in the office of Paul's literary \r\n agent, MARCIA SINDELL. The walls of the large room are \r\n absolutely crammed with book and movie posters, in English \r\n and all other kinds of other languages, all of them featuring \r\n the character of MISERY CHASTAIN, a perfectly beautiful woman. \r\n Misery's Challenge, Misery's Triumph--eight of them. All \r\n written by Paul Sheldon.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, lifting up the battered briefcase--maybe when new it \r\n cost two bucks, but he treats it like gold.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n An old friend. I was rummaging through \r\n a closet and it was just sitting \r\n there. Like it was waiting for me.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n (searching for a \r\n compliment)\r\n It's... it's nice, Paul. It's got... \r\n character.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TWO OF THEM\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n When I wrote my first book, I used \r\n to carry it around in this while I \r\n was looking for a publisher. That \r\n was a good book, Marcia. I was a \r\n writer then.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n You're still a writer.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I haven't been a writer since I got\r\n into the Misery business--\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n (holding up the cover \r\n art of MISERY'S CHILD)\r\n Not a bad business. This thing would \r\n still be growing, too. The first \r\n printing order on Misery's Child was\r\n the most ever--over a million.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Marcia, please.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n No, no. Misery Chastain put braces \r\n on your daughter's teeth and is \r\n putting her through college, bought \r\n you two houses and floor seats to \r\n the Knick games and what thanks does \r\n she get? You go and kill her.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Marcia, you know I started \"Misery\" \r\n on a lark. Do I look like a guy who \r\n writes romance novels? Do I sound \r\n like Danielle Steel? It was a one-\r\n time shot and we got lucky. I never \r\n meant it to become my life. And if I \r\n hadn't gotten rid of her now, I'd \r\n have ended up writing her forever.\r\n (touches his briefcase)\r\n For the first time in fifteen years, \r\n I think I'm really onto something \r\n here.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I'm glad to hear that, Paul, I really \r\n am. But you have to know--when your \r\n fans find out that you killed off \r\n their favorite heroine, they're not \r\n going to say, \"Ooh, good, Paul Sheldon \r\n can finally write what we've always \r\n wanted: An esoteric, semi-\r\n autobiographical character study.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (passionately)\r\n Marcia, why are you doing this to \r\n me? Don't you know I'm scared enough? \r\n Don't you think I remember how nobody \r\n gave a shit about my first books? \r\n You think I'm dying to go back to \r\n shouting in the wilderness?\r\n (beat)\r\n I'm doing this because I have to.\r\n (Marcia is stopped)\r\n Now, I'm leaving for Colorado to try \r\n to finish this and I want your good \r\n thoughts--because if I can make it \r\n work ...\r\n (beat)\r\n I might just have something that I \r\n want on my tombstone.\r\n\r\n On the word \"tombstone\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S TOMBSTONE--the upside down car with the blizzard coming \r\n gale-force and his motionless body trapped inside the car.\r\n\r\n The WIND screams. PAUL'S EYES flutter, then close.\r\n\r\n Hold\r\n\r\n Keep holding as--\r\n\r\n Suddenly there's a new sound as a crowbar SCRATCHES at the \r\n door--\r\n\r\n -- nd now the door is ripped open as we\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n A BUNDLED-UP FIGURE gently beginning to pull PAUL and the \r\n case from the car. For a moment, it's hard to tell if it's a \r\n man or woman--\r\n\r\n --not to let the cat out of the bag or anything, but it is, \r\n very much, a woman. Her name is ANNIE WILKES and she is close \r\n to Paul's age. She is in many ways a remarkable creature. \r\n Strong, self-sufficient, passionate in her likes and dislikes, \r\n loves and hates.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND ANNIE as she cradles him in her arms. Once he's \r\n clear of the car, she lays him carefully in the snow\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND ANNIE: CLOSE UP. She slowly brings her mouth down \r\n close to his. Then their lips touch as she forces air inside \r\n him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (Their lips touch \r\n again. Then--)\r\n You hear me--Breathe! I said \r\n breathe!!!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, as he starts to breathe--\r\n\r\n --in a moment his eyes suddenly open wide, but he's in shock, \r\n the eyes see nothing--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE--the moment she sees him come to life, she goes into \r\n action, lifting PAUL in a fireman's carry, starting the \r\n difficult climb back up the steep hill.\r\n\r\n As she moves away, she and Paul are obliterated by the white \r\n falling snow.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n THE WHITE OF WHAT SEEMS LIKE A HOSPITAL. Everything is bled \r\n of color. It's all vague--\r\n\r\n --we are looking at this from Paul's blurred vision.\r\n\r\n And throughout this next sequence, there are these SOUNDS, \r\n words really, but they make no sense.\r\n\r\n \"...no... worry...\r\n\r\n ...be... fine...\r\n\r\n ...good care... you...\r\n\r\n ...I'm your number one fan...\"\r\n\r\n The first thing we see during this is something all white. \r\n It takes a moment before we realize it's a ceiling.\r\n\r\n Now, a white wall.\r\n\r\n An I.V. bottle is next, the medicine dripping down a tube \r\n into PAUL'S LEFT ARM. The other arm is bandaged and in a \r\n sling.\r\n\r\n ANNIE is standing beside the bed. She wears off-white and \r\n seems very much like a nurse. A good nurse. She has pills in \r\n her hands.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. Motionless, dead pale. He has a little beard now. Eyes \r\n barely open, he's shaking with fever.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (hardly able to whisper)\r\n ...where... am I...?\r\n\r\n ANNIE is quickly by his side.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (so gently)\r\n Shhh... we're just outside Silver \r\n Creek.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n How long...?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You've been here two days. You're \r\n gonna be okay.\r\n (relieved)\r\n My name is Annie Wilkes and I'm--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n --my number one fan.\r\n\r\n And now the gibberish words make sense.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n That's right. I'm also a nurse. Here.\r\n (Now, as she brings \r\n the pills close)\r\n Take these.\r\n\r\n She helps him to swallow, as Paul's eyes close.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n AN EXTERIOR OF THE PLACE. It's a farmhouse--we 're in a \r\n desolate area with mountains in the background.\r\n\r\n THE HOUSE is set on a knoll so that Paul's room, although on \r\n the first floor, is ten feet off the ground.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, in the room. He's not on the I.V. anymore. His fever \r\n has broken. Annie enters, pills in her hand.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Here.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n What are they...?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n They're called Novril--they're for \r\n your pain.\r\n (helps him take them)\r\n\r\n ANNIE applies a cool rag to his forehead.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Shouldn't I be in a hospital?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n The blizzard was too strong. I \r\n couldn't risk trying to get you there. \r\n I tried calling, but the phone lines \r\n are down.\r\n\r\n PAUL tries to test his left arm.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (Gently, her fingers \r\n go to his eyelids, \r\n close them)\r\n Now you mustn't tire yourself. You've \r\n got to rest, you almost died.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP. Sometimes her face shows the most remarkable \r\n compassion. It does now.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON IT briefly.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n CLOSE UP ON PILLS IN ANNIE'S HAND\r\n\r\n ANNIE (O.S.)\r\n Open wide.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n He lies in bed. His fever is gone, but he's terribly weak.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. As she lays the pills on PAUL'S TONGUE, she gives him \r\n a glass of water from the nearby bed table.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, swallowing eagerly.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, watching him, sympathetically.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Your legs just sing grand opera when \r\n you move, don't they?\r\n (Paul says nothing, \r\n but his pain is clear)\r\n It's not going to hurt forever, Paul, \r\n I promise you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Will I be able to walk?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Of course you will. And your arm \r\n will be fine, too. Your shoulder was \r\n dislocated pretty badly, but I finally \r\n popped it back in there.\r\n (proudly)\r\n But what I'm most proud of is the \r\n work I did on those legs. Considering \r\n what I had around the house, I don't \r\n think there's a doctor who could \r\n have done any better.\r\n\r\n And now suddenly she flicks off the blankets, uncovering his \r\n body.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring, stunned at the bottom half of his body as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S LEGS. From the knees down he resembles an Egyptian \r\n mummy--she's splinted them with slim steel rods that look \r\n like the hacksawed remains of aluminum crutches and there's \r\n taping circling around.\r\n\r\n From the kness up they're all swollen and throbbing and \r\n horribly bruised and discolored.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, lying back, stunned with disbelief.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It's not nearly as bad as it looks. \r\n You have a compound fracture of the \r\n tibia in both legs, and the fibula \r\n in the left leg is fractured too. I \r\n could hear the bones moving, so it's \r\n best for your legs to remain immobile. \r\n And as soon as the roads open, I'll \r\n take you to a hospital.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n In the meantime, you've got a lot of \r\n recovering to do, and I consider it \r\n an honor that you'll do it in my \r\n home.\r\n\r\n HOLD on her ecstatic face.\r\n\r\n Then--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n MISERY'S PERFECT FACE. We're back in SINDELL's office in New \r\n York. The office looks just the same, posters and manuscripts \r\n all over. But she doesn't.\r\n\r\n She holds the phone and she is fidgety, insecure.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n This is Marcia Sindell calling from \r\n New York City. I'd like to speak to \r\n the Silver Creek Chief of Police or \r\n the Sheriff.\r\n\r\n MALE VOICE (O.S.)\r\n Which one do you want?\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Whichever one's not busy.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SMALL OFFICE IN SILVER CREEK\r\n\r\n ...with a view of the mountains.\r\n\r\n A MARVELOUS LOOKING MAN sits at a desk, by himself, holding \r\n the phone. In his sixties, he's still as bright, fast and \r\n sassy as he was half-a-lifetime ago. Never mind what his \r\n name is, everyone calls him BUSTER.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I'm pretty sure they 're both not \r\n busy, Ms. Sindell, since they're \r\n both me. I also happen to be President \r\n of the Policeman's Benefit \r\n Association, Chairman of the \r\n Patrolman's Retirement Fund, and if \r\n you need a good fishing guide, you \r\n could do a lot worse; call me Buster, \r\n everybody does, what can I do for \r\n you?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SINDELL in her office. She pushes the speakerphone, gets up, \r\n paces; she's very hesitant when she speaks about Paul. Almost \r\n embarrassed--\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I'm a literary agent, and I feel \r\n like a fool calling you, but I think \r\n one of my clients, Paul Sheldon, \r\n might be in some kind of trouble.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Paul Sheldon? You mean Paul Sheldon \r\n the writer?\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n He's your client, huh?\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Yes, he is.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S OFFICE\r\n\r\n He rolls a penny across the back of one hand--he's very good \r\n at it, doesn't even look while he does it.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n People sure like those Misery books.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I'm sure you know Paul's been going \r\n to the Silver Creek Lodge for years \r\n to finish his books.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Yeah, I understand he's been up here \r\n the last six weeks.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Not quite. I just called, and they \r\n said he checked out five days ago. \r\n Isn't that a little strange?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I don't know. Does he always phone \r\n you when he checks out of hotels?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SINDELL, really embarrassed now.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n No, no, of course not. It's just \r\n that his daughter hasn't heard from \r\n him, and when he's got a book coming \r\n out, he usually keeps in touch. So \r\n when there was no word from him...\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n You think he might be missing?\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n (shakes her head)\r\n I hate that I made this call--tell \r\n me I'm being silly.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. He nods as a WOMAN enters, carrying lunch. It's his \r\n wife, VIRGINIA. She begins putting the food down on a table \r\n for the both of them.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Just a little over-protective, maybe.\r\n (beat)\r\n Tell you what--nothing's been reported \r\n out here--\r\n (he puts Paul Sheldon's \r\n name with a ? on a 3 \r\n x 5 CARD)\r\n --but I'll put his name through our \r\n system.\r\n (he tacks the card to \r\n a bulletin board)\r\n And if anything turns up, I'll call \r\n you right away.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SINDELL. She smiles, a genuine sense of relief.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I appreciate that. Thanks a lot.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n G'bye, Ms. Sindell.\r\n\r\n As he hangs up--\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n We actually got a phone call. Busy \r\n morning.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (smiles)\r\n Work, work, work.\r\n (gives her a hug)\r\n Virginia? When was that blizzard?\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Four or five days ago. Why?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. The penny flies across the back of his hand. He \r\n doesn't look at it, stares instead out the window at the \r\n mountains.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (a beat)\r\n ...no reason...\r\n\r\n HOLD ON BUSTER for a moment.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL'S VOICE\r\n (soft)\r\n I guess it was kind of a miracle... \r\n you finding me...\r\n\r\n ANNIE's soft, sweet laughter is heard. She stands over him, \r\n finishing shaving him with a very sharp straight razor. She \r\n wears what we will come to know as her regular costume--plain \r\n wool skirts, grey cardigan sweaters.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n No, it wasn't a miracle at all... in \r\n a way, I was following you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Following me?\r\n\r\n ANNIE concentrates on shaving him with great care; she has \r\n wonderful, strong hands.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (explaining, normally)\r\n Well, it wasn't any secret to me \r\n that you were staying at the Silver \r\n Creek, seeing as how I'm your number-\r\n one fan and all. Some nights I'd \r\n just tool on down there, sit outside \r\n and look up at the light in your \r\n cabin--\r\n (gently moves his \r\n head back, exposing \r\n his neck; this next \r\n is said with total \r\n sincerity, almost \r\n awe)\r\n and I'd try to imagine what was going \r\n on in the room of the world's greatest \r\n writer.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Say that last part again, I didn't \r\n quite hear--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (smiles)\r\n Don't move now--wouldn't want to \r\n hurt this neck--\r\n (shaving away)\r\n Well, the other afternoon I was on \r\n my way home, and there you were, \r\n leaving the Lodge, and I wondered \r\n why a literary genius would go for a \r\n drive when there was a big storm \r\n coming.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I didn't know it was going to be a \r\n big storm.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Lucky for you, I did.\r\n (pauses)\r\n Lucky for me too. Because now you're \r\n alive and you can write more books. \r\n Oh, Paul, I've read everything of \r\n Yours, but the Misery novels...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I know them all by heart, Paul, all \r\n eight of them. I love them so.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, looking at her. There's something terribly touching \r\n about her now.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You're very kind...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n And you're very brilliant, and you \r\n must be a good man, or you could \r\n never have created such a wondrous, \r\n loving creature as Misery Chastain.\r\n (runs her fingers \r\n over his cheek)\r\n Like a baby.\r\n (smiles)\r\n All done.\r\n (starts to dab away \r\n the last bits of \r\n soap)\r\n\r\n ANNIE starts cleaning up.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n When do you think the phone lines'll \r\n be back up? I have to call my \r\n daughter, and I should call New York \r\n and let my agent know I'm breathing.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It shouldn't be too much longer.\r\n (gently)\r\n Once the roads are open, the lines'll \r\n be up in no time. If you give me \r\n their numbers, I'll keep trying them \r\n for you.\r\n (suddenly almost \r\n embarrassed)\r\n Could I ask you a favor?\r\n (Paul nods)\r\n I noticed in your case there was a \r\n new Paul Sheldon book and...\r\n (hesitant)\r\n and I wondered if maybe...\r\n (her voice trails off)\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You want to read it?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (quietly)\r\n If you wouldn't mind.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I have a hard and fast rule about \r\n who can read my stuff at this early \r\n stage--only my editor, my agent, and \r\n anyone who saves me from freezing to \r\n death in a car wreck.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (genuinely thrilled)\r\n You'll never realize what a rare \r\n treat you've given me.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. His eyes close briefly, he grimaces.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, watching him, concerned. She glances at her watch.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Boy, it's like clockwork, the way \r\n your pain comes--I'll get you your \r\n Novril, Paul. Forgive me for prattling \r\n away and making you feel all oogy.\r\n\r\n She turns and goes out of the room.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, watching her.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What's your new book called?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't have a title yet.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What's it about?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (fast)\r\n It's crazy, but I don't really know, \r\n I mean I haven't written anything \r\n but \"Misery\" for so long that--you \r\n read it you can tell me what you \r\n think it's about. Maybe you can come \r\n up with a title.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (in the doorway)\r\n Oh, like I could do that?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MANAGER'S OFFICE AT THE SILVER CREEK LODGE\r\n\r\n Small, neat, one window--outside, snow covers all.\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND LIBBY, THE MANAGER, are going over books and \r\n records. Libby is an old guy, walks with a cane.\r\n\r\n LIBBY\r\n Nothing unusual about Mr. Sheldon's \r\n leaving, Buster--you can tell by the \r\n champagne.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Maybe you can, Libby.\r\n\r\n LIBBY\r\n No, see, he always ordered a bottle \r\n of Dom Perignon when he was ready to \r\n go. Then he'd pay up and be out the\r\n door.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n No long-distance phone calls, Federal \r\n Express packages--anything at all \r\n out of the ordinary?\r\n\r\n LIBBY\r\n (head shake)\r\n I don't think Mr. Sheldon likes for \r\n things to be out of the ordinary. \r\n Considering who he is and all, famous \r\n and all, he doesn't have airs. Drives \r\n the same car out from New York each \r\n time--'65 Mustang--said it helps him \r\n think. He was always a good guest, \r\n never made a noise, never bothered a \r\n soul. Sure hope nothing happened to \r\n him.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n So do I...\r\n\r\n LIBBY\r\n I'll bet that old Mustang's pulling \r\n into New York right now.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I'm sure you're right.\r\n\r\n But you can tell he's not sure at all as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A SPOON FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH BEEF BARLEY SOUP\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM.\r\n\r\n He lies in bed. Sun comes in the lone window. ANNIE sits on \r\n the bed, a large bowl of soup in her hands, feeding him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (almost shy about \r\n this)\r\n I know I'm only forty pages into \r\n your book, but...\r\n\r\n She stops, fills the spoon up again.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n But what?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Nothing.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n No, what is it?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, it's ridiculous, who am I to \r\n make a criticism to someone like \r\n you?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I can take it, go ahead.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Well, it's brilliantly written, but \r\n then everything you write is \r\n brilliant.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Pretty rough so far.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (a burst)\r\n The swearing, Paul.\r\n (beat)\r\n There, I said it.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n The profanity bothers you?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It has no nobility.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, these are slum kids, I was a \r\n slum kid, everybody talks like that.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. She holds the soup bowl in one hand, the muddy-colored \r\n beef barley soup close to spilling.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n They do not. What do you think I say \r\n when I go to the feed store in town?\r\n \"Now, Wally, give me a bag of that \r\n effing pigfeed and ten pounds of \r\n that bitchly cow-corn\"--\r\n\r\n PAUL is amused by this.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SOUP, almost spilling as she gets more agitated.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n --and in the bank do I tell Mrs. \r\n Bollinger, \"Here's one big bastard \r\n of a check, give me some of your \r\n Christing money.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, almost laughing as some soup hits the coverlet.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (seeing the spill, \r\n suddenly upset)\r\n There! Look there! See what you made \r\n me do!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL--his smile disappears.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, and she is just totally embarrassed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. \r\n Sometimes I get so worked up. Can \r\n you ever forgive me? Here...\r\n\r\n She hands him his pills and starts to clean the soup off the \r\n coverlet. Then she makes the sweetest smile.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I love you, Paul.\r\n (more embarrassed \r\n than ever)\r\n Your mind. Your creativity--that's \r\n all I meant.\r\n\r\n Flustered, she turns away as we--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A ROAD IN THE MOUNTAINS. Piles of snow all around but it's \r\n been ploughed enough so it's driveable.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A CAR coming into view. Up ahead is the sign we've already \r\n seen: \"Curved Road, Next 13 Miles.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE CAR\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND HIS WIFE VIRGINIA: Virginia is driving while Buster \r\n intently studies the terrain. He reaches for a large thermos, \r\n pours some coffee, offers it to her. She shakes her head. He \r\n begins to sip it.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n This sure is fun.\r\n\r\n She puts her hand on his leg.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (removing it)\r\n Virginia, when you're in this car, \r\n you're not my wife, you're my deputy.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Well, this deputy would rather be \r\n home under the covers with the \r\n Sheriff.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CAR. Suddenly, it goes into a little icy spin--she fights \r\n it back under control.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE CAR\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (suddenly)\r\n Stop--stop right here.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n What? What is it?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CAR, skidding, slowing, stopping. BOTH OF THEM get out, \r\n go to the edge of the road. Mountains of snow. Nothing much \r\n else visible. Then Buster points.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Look at that broken branch there...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA, seeing it, unconvinced.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Could be the weight of the snow.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Could be--or a rotten branch or a \r\n mountain lion could have landed on \r\n it. Could be a lot of things.\r\n\r\n He steps off the road, starts down.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA, watching him, worried--it's very slippery.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, graceful, in great shape, navigating down easily.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TREE that the car ran into. BUSTER reaches it, studies \r\n it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA, staring out after him--she can't see him because \r\n the drop is both too steep and covered with trees and mounds \r\n of snow.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Anything down there?\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S VOICE (O.S.)\r\n Yeah. An enormous amount of snow.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. He's moved away from the tree now, going toward where \r\n the Mustang is buried.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MOUND OF SNOW with the Mustang inside.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, making his way closer to it, closer, staring around.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE AREA. Nothing to be seen--everything is covered with \r\n mountains of snow. You could have a house down there and not \r\n be able to see it. Just glaring white.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, angry, frustrated, turning around and around and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER from another angle, from behind the mound with the \r\n Mustang inside--and out of his sight, glistening in the sun, \r\n a bit of the door protrudes. But, of course, Buster can't \r\n see it.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON BUSTER, in a sour mood, staring around as the edge \r\n of the door continues to glisten.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA, on the road as Buster makes his way back up, still \r\n ticked.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n (they move to the car)\r\n You really think Sheldon's out there?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Hope not--if he is, he's dead. Let's \r\n go to the newspaper office.\r\n\r\n As they get in the car--\r\n\r\n ANOTHER CAR DRIVING BY--it's Annie in her Jeep--neither she \r\n nor Buster notice each other.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n The door opens and ANNIE enters.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake \r\n you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It's fine.\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n Paul's eyes fluttering awake to see the hardback copy of his \r\n novel, Misery's Child, in Annie's hands. She's never been \r\n more excited--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n They had it at the store, Paul, there \r\n was a whole batch of them there. As \r\n soon as I saw it, I slammed my money\r\n down. I got the first copy.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Then the roads are open...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n The one to town is, but that's about \r\n it. I called the hospital and talked \r\n to the head orthopedic surgeon. I \r\n told him who you were and what had \r\n happened. He said as long as there's \r\n no infection, you're not in any \r\n danger, and as soon as the road to \r\n the hospital is open, they'll send \r\n an ambulance for you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n The phones are working?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Well, mine's still out. But the ones \r\n in town were working just fine. I \r\n called that agent of yours.\r\n (soft now)\r\n Oh, Paul, I peeked at the very \r\n beginning.\r\n (looks at him)\r\n What a wonderful first page--just to \r\n read the name Misery Chastain...\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n My daughter must be going nuts.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n ...it's like a visit from my oldest,\r\n dearest friend.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I was supposed to be home for her \r\n birthday three days ago.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Your agent said she would tell her \r\n you were okay. But I'm afraid you'll \r\n have to wait until tomorrow if you \r\n want to speak to her yourself.\r\n\r\n She starts to leave, stops at the door.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (She looks at him now \r\n with almost a look \r\n of amazement)\r\n Oh, Paul, what a poet you are...\r\n\r\n As she leaves--\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, watching as she enters, moves to him, carrying a tray.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I made you my speciality--scrambled \r\n eggs a la Wilkes. And I'm on page \r\n 75.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I guess that means it's okay.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n No. No, it isn't, it's--\r\n (halts)\r\n --oh pooh, I can't think of any words. \r\n Would \"great\" be insulting?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I can live with \"great.\"\r\n\r\n He starts, with effort, to eat.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (as she turns, goes)\r\n No, it's not just great, it's perfect, \r\n a perfect, perfect thing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. MID-AFTERNOON\r\n\r\n ANNIE is clearing Paul's tray. She hands him his Novril; he \r\n quickly swallows them.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'm up to page 185. I always get sad \r\n when I pass the halfway point. Will \r\n you do me a favor? I'd love it if \r\n you would autograph my copy. I already \r\n have your autograph on a picture, \r\n but it would mean so much to me to \r\n get it in person. I know you're right-\r\n handed, so don't worry if it's not \r\n so legible. I'll cherish it anyway.\r\n\r\n As PAUL signs the book:\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I don't mean to pry, but I've read \r\n in two magazines now where you were \r\n seeing this model who does those \r\n disgusting jeans commercials. And I \r\n said it can't be true. Paul Sheldon \r\n would never waste his time with a \r\n trampy woman like that.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, you can't believe everything \r\n you read in magazines.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I knew it. I knew it wasn't true. \r\n Boy, how do they get away with \r\n printing stuff like that?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You'd be amazed at what some people \r\n will believe.\r\n\r\n He finishes the autograph, hands the book back to her.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Thank you so much.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n My pleasure.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW - LATE - AFTERNOON SUNLIGHT\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOOR. IT opens and guess what--a sow lumbers in.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, kind of stunned as this female pig skitters its way \r\n around the room, excited, confused, slipping and sliding.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, all smiles and happiness, laughing in the doorway.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I thought it was time you two should \r\n meet. Paul, say hello to my favorite \r\n beast in all the world, my sow, \r\n Misery.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Misery?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PIG, snorting around the room.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND ANNIE, watching it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yes. I told you I was your number-\r\n one fan.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm getting to believe you.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n This farm was getting kind of dreary, \r\n what with just the few cows and \r\n chickens and me--\r\n (happy)\r\n But when I got Misery here, everything \r\n Changed--she just makes me smile so.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n She's a fine... uh... pig is what \r\n she is...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (scooping up the pig, \r\n holding it tight as \r\n she stands by Paul)\r\n I'm on page three-hundred now, Paul, \r\n and it's better than perfect--it's \r\n divine. What's the ceiling that dago \r\n painted?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n The Sistine Chapel?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yeah, that and Misery's Child--those \r\n are the only two divine things ever \r\n in this world...\r\n\r\n PAUL watches as the pig skitters out of the room with ANNIE \r\n in pursuit, happily imitating the pig.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Woink! Whoink! Whuh-Whuh-WHOINK!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL staring after them--what the hell was that?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW. DUSK.\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S VOICE is heard softly.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n When my husband left me... I wasn't \r\n prepared, it wasn't an easy time...\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n ANNIE, standing at the window, her back to the room.\r\n\r\n In bed, PAUL is dealing with a bedpan, peeing.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n For a while I thought I might go \r\n crazy.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I know how that can be.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I don't know about you, but what I \r\n did to get through it was I dove \r\n into work--days, nights--night shifts \r\n can be lonely at a hospital. I did a \r\n lot of reading. That was hen I first \r\n discovered Misery. She made me so \r\n happy. She made me forget all my \r\n problems.\r\n (She smiles now)\r\n 'Course, I suppose you had a little \r\n something to do with that too.\r\n\r\n There is a peeing sound.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yeah, well...\r\n\r\n He is embarrassed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (She isn't)\r\n I just kept reading them over and \r\n over. I know when I finish this one--\r\n and I've only got two chapters to go--\r\n I'll just turn right to the front \r\n page and start reading it again.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (She turns around, \r\n moves to the bed)\r\n Done?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yeah, thanks.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n No problem.\r\n\r\n As she takes the bedpan...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't get me wrong. I'm not against \r\n marriage per se. But it would take a \r\n pretty special guy to make me want \r\n to go down the aisle again.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, it's not something you should\r\n enter into lightly.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It boils down to respect. People \r\n just don't respect the institution \r\n of marriage any more. They have no \r\n sense of real commitment.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, attempting to smile. There is not much he can say to \r\n this.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'd love to stay here and chat, but \r\n I'm right at the end and I gotta \r\n find out what happens.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, I hope you like it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Of course I'll like it. Misery's \r\n about to have her child. What's it \r\n gonna be, a boy or a girl? Ooh, don't \r\n tell me.\r\n\r\n With that, she exits.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW. MOONLIGHT.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He's been dozing but now his eyes flutter awake as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOOR. It opens and ANNIE enters, comes to his bedside.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. Hard to see. He squints up as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. CLOSE UP: her face is ashen pale.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You...you dirty bird. She can't be \r\n dead. Misery Chastain cannot be dead! \r\n How could you?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, in 1871, women often died in \r\n childbirth, but her spirit is the \r\n important thing, and Misery's spirit \r\n is still alive--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (screaming)\r\n I DON'T WANT HER SPIRIT! I want HER!\r\n And you MURDERED her!\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I DIDN'T...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Then who did?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n No one--she just died--she slipped \r\n away, that's all.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (screaming)\r\n She slipped away? She slipped away? \r\n She didn't just slip away. You did \r\n it. You did it. You did it. You did \r\n it. You murdered my Misery.\r\n\r\n And now she has lifted a chair--it's heavy but she's very \r\n strong--and she raises it and turns on Paul, and it's high \r\n above her head, and PAUL realizes that this might be it, she \r\n might shatter him with it, crunch his skull--and that's just \r\n what she seems she's about to do--and then she swings it, \r\n not against him but against the wall, and it shatters and \r\n she's panting from the effort as she turns on him again, her \r\n voice surprisingly soft.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I thought you were good, Paul, but \r\n you're not good, you're just another \r\n lying old dirty birdie and I don't \r\n think I better be around you for \r\n awhile.\r\n (she crosses to the \r\n door, then stops)\r\n And don't even think about anybody \r\n coming for you, not the doctors, not \r\n your agent, not your family--because \r\n I never called them. Nobody knows \r\n you're here. And you better hope \r\n nothing happens to me because if I \r\n die, you die.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, watching as she closes the door behind her. Then there \r\n is a RATTLE OF A KEY and the sound of the door to his room \r\n LOCKING.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, getting in her Cherokee and gunning away.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL lies still. He looks around the room and listens for \r\n sounds. All he hears are the SOUNDS OF A WINTER NIGHT in the \r\n mountains. After a few beats, he takes a deep breath and \r\n then begins his greatest effort of all: to force his body \r\n out of bed, to make it move.\r\n\r\n He's still weak from what he's endured, but that's not the \r\n main thing: it's the pain. Any attempt at movement and his \r\n legs scream. He sags back, lies there still a moment. Slowly \r\n he tries to maneuver his body off the bed. He rolls over \r\n onto his stomach, then tries to lower himself onto the floor \r\n by moving down head first. His good arm hits the floor, and \r\n he is able to hold himself up but, realizing there is no way \r\n to get out of bed without causing tremendous pain, he girds \r\n himself and flings himself out of bed and comes crashing to \r\n the floor.\r\n\r\n The pain is excruciating. After he regains his composure, he \r\n slowly crawls toward the door.\r\n\r\n He reaches up and tries the handle. It is, in fact, locked. \r\n He awkwardly tries to slam up against the door, but it is \r\n much too painful and to no avail. He crawls back over to the \r\n bed, realizes there's no way to climb back in, then grabs\r\n\r\n the blanket from the bed, wraps it around himself, and closes \r\n his eyes.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S OFFICE. DAY.\r\n\r\n He sits alone at his desk on the telephone, staring at the \r\n Rocky Mountain Gazette spread in front of him.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE NEWSPAPER'S FRONT PAGE\r\n\r\n In a prominent spot on the top is what is most likely a book-\r\n jacket photo of Paul. Above the picture is the following: \r\n \"HAVE YOU SEEN PAUL SHELDON?\"\r\n\r\n BUSTER is on the phone with Marcia Sindell.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n No, Ms. Sindell, there's no point in \r\n coming up here now. Everything that \r\n can be done is... Yes, we're working \r\n closely with the state police, and \r\n the FBI has been informed. Right... \r\n Right... As soon as we know anything \r\n we'll let you know. No, it's no \r\n bother. Call anytime. Bye, Ms. \r\n Sindell.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA enters, carrying some files.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Here's the list of all Sheldon's \r\n credit charges. Nothing after the \r\n Silver Creek.\r\n (With a glance at his \r\n dour face, she \r\n indicates the photo)\r\n Any calls?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Just from his agent.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. His eyes flick up to her. An almost imperceptible \r\n shake of the head.\r\n\r\n HOLD FOR A MOMENT, then--\r\n\r\n FACES. They are distorted, and they come into view but \r\n briefly, then change into the next distorted face. All kinds-- \r\n there is no order to them\r\n\r\n --young, Oriental, female, male, pretty, sad, black, not so \r\n pretty, happy, white, old--what we HEAR is this:\r\n\r\n \"...You've changed my life...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I'm your number one fan...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I'm a really big fan of yours...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I'm your biggest fan...\"\r\n\r\n \"...Don't ever stop writing those Misery books...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I've read all your books, but the Misery's... well...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I'm your number one fan...\"\r\n\r\n \"...You've given me such pleasure...\"\r\n\r\n \"...I feel like you're writing just for me...\"\r\n\r\n And now, it gets kicked up in speed and all goes faster, \r\n many times overlapping.\r\n\r\n \"...I love you... I'm your number one fan... I'm your biggest \r\n fan... We love you... number one... love you... biggest... \r\n love you... number one... number one... you poor dear \r\n thing...\"\r\n\r\n This last was said by Annie, out of focus, and for a moment, \r\n she stays that way--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROOM, AS IT SNAPS BACK INTO FOCUS--ANNIE is standing by \r\n the bed. It is dusk.\r\n\r\n She wears a dark blue dress and a hat with a sprig of flowers. \r\n Her eyes are bright and vivacious--the fact is, this is the \r\n prettiest ANNIE WILKES has ever looked.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What are you doing on the floor?\r\n (crossing to the bed)\r\n It's my fault. If I'd had a proper \r\n hospital bed, this never would have \r\n happened. Here, let me help you back \r\n in.\r\n (She lifts him back \r\n into the bed, which \r\n causes considerable \r\n pain)\r\n I know this hurts, but it'll only \r\n take a few seconds. There you go. \r\n Comfy?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (in pain)\r\n Perfect.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You're such a kidder. I have a big \r\n surprise for you. But first there's\r\n something you must do.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't suppose I could have a little \r\n snack while I wait for the\r\n surprise?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'll get you everything you want, \r\n but you must listen first. Sometimes \r\n my thinking is a little muddy, I \r\n accept that. It's why I couldn't \r\n remember all those things they were \r\n asking me on the witness stand in \r\n Denver.\r\n\r\n Now she turns, goes to the doorway, keeping on talking. She \r\n is never out of sight.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n But this time I thought clearly. I \r\n asked God about you and God said \"I \r\n delivered him unto you so that you \r\n may show him the way.\"\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Show me the way?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n She exits and re-enters wheeling something toward his bed. \r\n It's a charcoal barbecue, the kind you use in summer for \r\n cooking hamburgers. She holds several items in her arms: a \r\n box of Diamond Blue Tip wooden matches, a can of lighter \r\n fluid. And most noticeably, Paul's manuscript.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE AND PAUL. He watches, mute, as she takes off the grill, \r\n puts the manuscript into the barbecue itself where the \r\n charcoal goes, spritzes it with lighter fluid. The grill is \r\n close enough to the bed for him to reach out and drop a match.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n When I mentioned a snack, I was \r\n thinking more along the lines of a\r\n cheese and crackers kind of thing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, looking at him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, this is no time for jokes. You \r\n must rid the world of this filth.\r\n\r\n She hands him the box of kitchen matches.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You want me to burn my book?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (she nods)\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You want me to burn my book?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I know this may be difficult for \r\n you, but it's for the best.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n This isn't difficult, my agent's \r\n made dozens of copies. There's gonna \r\n be an auction on this, and every \r\n publishing house in New York is \r\n reading it now. So if you want me to \r\n burn it, fine. You're not ridding \r\n the world of anything.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, watching him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (quietly)\r\n Then light the match, Paul.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n No big deal.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n So you've indicated. Do it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MATCHES. PAUL'S HANDS are starting to tremble now. He \r\n can't do it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I know this is the only copy, Paul. \r\n When you were twenty-four you wrote \r\n your first book and you didn't make \r\n a copy, because you didn't think \r\n anybody would take it seriously. But \r\n they did. And ever since you've never \r\n made any copies because you're \r\n superstitious--it's why you always \r\n come back to the Silver Creek Lodge. \r\n You told that story to Merv Griffin \r\n eleven years ago.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You know, Annie, this book never \r\n would have survived without you. \r\n When it gets to new York, there will \r\n be a big auction, and whatever it \r\n brings we can split.\r\n (pause)\r\n God knows you're entitled to it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul. This isn't about money. \r\n It's about decency and purity. It's \r\n about God's values.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You're right. You're right. I don't \r\n know what I was thinking. I'll tell \r\n you what. It doesn't have to be \r\n published. Nobody ever has to see \r\n it. I'll just keep it for myself. No \r\n one will ever have to know it exists.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n As long as it does exist, your mind \r\n won't ever be free. I think you should \r\n light the match, Paul.\r\n\r\n There is a long silence. PAUL doesn't move.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Can't you see it's what God wants?\r\n\r\n She's holding the can of lighter fluid in her hand as she \r\n speaks and absentmindedly flicks a few drops of the fluid on \r\n the bed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You're so brilliant. I would think \r\n you'd certainly be able to see that.\r\n (More drops fall on \r\n the bed)\r\n We're put on this earth to help \r\n people, Paul. Like I'm trying to \r\n help you.\r\n\r\n PAUL watches as the fluid continues to drop on the bed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Please let me help you.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. His hands shaking. Almost robot-like, he strikes one. \r\n It flames.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You're doing the right thing, Paul.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BARBECUE, as Paul's hand appears, drops the match on the \r\n fluid-soaked manuscript. For a moment--nothing--\r\n\r\n --and then, KABOOM, the goddamn thing practically explodes \r\n and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring, dazed, and as the flames leap higher,\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, suddenly scared and startled at the heat and the size \r\n of the flames and the full baking heat and\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (crying out)\r\n Goodness!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BARBECUE. The sound is LOUDER as the flames leap up and \r\n now charred bits of paper begin floating upward and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, watching, as more bits of paper rise.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Goodness--Goodness--Oh, my gracious--\r\n\r\n And she starts trying to catch them.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A PIECE OF BURNING PAPER in midair, floating against the \r\n gauzy curtain, and for a moment it looks like the curtain \r\n will catch fire and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, panicked, racing out of the room, going \"Goodness, \r\n heavens to Betsy\"--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BARBECUE, and what's left of the book.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, and he cannot take his eyes off the disaster.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, hurrying back in, carrying a big bucket, slopping \r\n water as she lifts the bucket.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE LAST of the manuscript as the bucket of water is tossed \r\n onto it--there's hissing and steam and as the steam clears \r\n it all looks now like a log in a brackish pond.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Well, isn't that an oogy mess?\r\n\r\n As she starts to wheel the barbecue out, suddenly there is a \r\n new and different sound as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, head turning toward the window.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE taking a step toward the window, stopping for a moment. \r\n The sound we're hearing is a motor. A HELICOPTER MOTOR. And \r\n it's getting louder. Annie goes to the window now, looks \r\n toward the sky as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A HELICOPTER flying along.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE HELICOPTER\r\n\r\n BUSTER and a PILOT are in the machine. Buster has a pair of \r\n binoculars looped around his neck, a map rumpled in his lap.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (pointing out)\r\n That's the Steadman place up there.\r\n (The pilot nods. Buster \r\n points again)\r\n The only other place up here is the \r\n Wilkes farm.\r\n\r\n Another nod. The PILOT points down. BUSTER stares through \r\n the binoculars.\r\n\r\n WHAT HE SEES: ANNIE'S JEEP parked in front of her house.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE HELICOPTER\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n That's no '65 Mustang. There's nothing \r\n else out this way--circle on back.\r\n\r\n As the pilot starts to change direction\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE at the window, watching, as the helicopter turns, starts \r\n off.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, listening as the MOTOR sound recedes.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, staring out the window.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I do believe the winters are getting \r\n shorter and shorter every year. People \r\n say it has something to do with the \r\n ozone layer. What do you think?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't know.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yeah, well, it's a theory. Here's \r\n your Novril.\r\n (she wheels the \r\n barbecue to the door; \r\n stops)\r\n How does tuna casserole sound for \r\n dinner?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Great.\r\n\r\n She exits. PAUL takes the two Novril, stares at them, then \r\n deliberately tucks them under his mattress.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n As PAUL is finishing the last of his tuna casserole. There \r\n are two Novrils on his tray. We hear strains of TV GAME SHOW \r\n THEME MUSIC. These sounds are not surprising. Paul has heard \r\n them before.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n It is much smaller than Paul's and filled with religious \r\n bric-a-brac, pictures of Paul Sheldon, and a TV on a portable \r\n stand. Annie lies in bed, with an open bag of Cheetos resting \r\n on her stomach and a big quart-sized plastic bottle of Coke \r\n on the nightstand. As she munches away, she is heavily \r\n engrossed in her favorite TV show, \"The Love Connection.\" As \r\n Chuck Woolery extracts the embarrassing details of a couple's \r\n romantic interlude, we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n Paul faintly hearing the sounds of the TV. He has now finished \r\n eating. He takes the two Novril from under the mattress. He \r\n then undoes the sheet, takes his fork and delicately pokes a \r\n hole in the mattress, then stuffs all four pills back into \r\n the hole.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n FARMHOUSE\r\n\r\n Coming up to dawn.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S DOOR slowly opening.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring at the door.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n WHEELS, seen from underneath the bed, being rolled around \r\n the foot of the bed. We realize PAUL is in a wheelchair with \r\n ANNIE pushing him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n See, isn't this nice?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Great. I've always wanted to visit \r\n the other side of the room.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n And look what I've got for you. An \r\n electric razor so you can shave \r\n yourself now.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n If I knew this was gonna be the \r\n surprise, you could've gotten me to\r\n burn all my books.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (She hands him some \r\n Novril)\r\n Now don't josh. This is a very big \r\n day for you, Paul. Here. You just \r\n sit tight, and I'll set everything \r\n up.\r\n\r\n ANNIE exits.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, quickly shoving the Novril into the mattress.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Set what up?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n That's the big surprise. Your new \r\n studio--after all, writers do need a \r\n place to work.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Work? You mean write? What in the \r\n world do you think I'd write?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, but Paul!\r\n (flushed)\r\n I don't think, I know! Now that you've \r\n gotten rid of that nasty manuscript, \r\n you can go back to doing what you're \r\n great at--\r\n (beat)\r\n --you're going to write a new novel-- \r\n your greatest achievement ever--\r\n Misery's Return.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. Stunned.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (after a beat)\r\n Misery's Return?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I know you didn't mean it when you \r\n killed her, and now you'll make it \r\n right.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP. In an almost religious fervor.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yes. It will be a book in my honor. \r\n For saving your life and nursing you \r\n back to health. I'll be the first \r\n one to read it.\r\n (beat)\r\n Oh, Paul, you're going to make me \r\n the envy of the whole world...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You just expect me to whip something \r\n off, that it?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (nods)\r\n I expect nothing less than your \r\n masterpiece.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You do understand that this isn't \r\n the ordinary way books get written--\r\n I mean, some people might actually \r\n consider this an oddball situation.\r\n\r\n She rolls him over to a table she has set up by the window.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I have total confidence in your \r\n brilliance--besides, the view will\r\n inspire you.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW, as the wheelchair approaches it.\r\n\r\n The sky is innocent of clouds. There's a green forest climbing \r\n the flank of the nearest mountain. A plot of open ground \r\n between the house and the mountain. A neat red barn where \r\n the livestock stay. A Jeep Cherokee, maybe five years old. A \r\n Fisher plow. And no neighbors in sight. This is a desolate \r\n place.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You just inhale that. I'll be right \r\n back.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring out the window.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (calling out)\r\n I guess you don't get bothered by\r\n neighbors much.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't worry about that. You'll have \r\n total solitude so you can concentrate \r\n on your work.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Great.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE in the doorway, carrying reams of typing paper, pencils, \r\n pens and sharpener.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, watching her--it's all kind of amazing. She hands him \r\n a box of typing paper.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I got you this expensive paper to \r\n type on.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, looking at the paper. It's Corrasable Bond. An idea \r\n hits him; he masks it as best he can.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (putting the rest of \r\n the paper on the \r\n table)\r\n And I got a great deal on this fifty-\r\n pound clunker--on account of it's \r\n missing an \"n.\" I told the saleslady \r\n \"n\" was one of the letters in my \r\n favorite writer's name.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It's two of the letters in my favorite \r\n nurse's name, Annie.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (embarrassed, blushing)\r\n You--fooler...!\r\n (turns, grabs up pens, \r\n pencils, paper)\r\n Did I do good?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (gesturing to the box \r\n of paper)\r\n You did great, except there's just \r\n one little thing--I can't work with \r\n this paper. It's Corrasable Bond, it \r\n smudges. Maybe you could go back \r\n into town and bring me some white, \r\n long-grained mimeo.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n But mine cost the most so I don't \r\n see how it could smudge.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (quickly taking a \r\n sheet of paper, making \r\n a pencil mark on it)\r\n C'mere, I'll show you.\r\n\r\n As she approaches, he rubs his thumb over the pencil mark.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (looking at it)\r\n Well, it does smudge after all--isn't \r\n that fascinating?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I thought you'd be interested. I'd \r\n like you to be in on everything, \r\n Annie. Not just the finished book, \r\n but how it's written.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Thank you for thinking of me.\r\n (She can be so charming \r\n when she wants)\r\n Anything else I can get while I'm in \r\n town? Any other crucial requirements \r\n that need satisfying? Would you like \r\n a tiny tape recorder? Or maybe a \r\n handmade set of writing slippers?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n No, just the paper will be fine.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (suddenly very agitated)\r\n Are you sure? 'Cause if you want, \r\n I'll bring back the whole store for \r\n you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, what's the matter?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What's the matter? I'll tell you \r\n what's the matter. I go out of my \r\n way for you. I do everything to try \r\n and make you happy. I feed you, I \r\n clean you, I dress you. And what \r\n thanks do I get? \"You bought the \r\n wrong paper, Annie. I can't write on \r\n this paper, Annie.\" Well, I'll get \r\n your stupid paper, but you just better \r\n start showing me a little more \r\n appreciation around here, Mister \r\n Man.\r\n\r\n With that, she throws the ream of paper in PAUL'S LAP, causing \r\n considerable pain.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOOR as she slams it shut, locks it, stomps off and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW. Annie, in a parka, can be seen storming out in \r\n the direction where her Cherokee was parked. She gets in and \r\n drives off.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He heaves a sigh, reaches out toward his tortured knees, \r\n then drops his head. He sees something.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BOBBY PIN on the floor.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, as he moves toward the bobby pin. Or tries to. It's \r\n brutally hard for him. The chair moves half a foot. Stops. \r\n Paul strains again. Another half foot. Another.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n The BOBBY PIN. The wheelchair is beside it now. PAUL reaches \r\n down for it. Can't make it. Tries again. Can't. He takes a \r\n deep breath, forces himself to bend, ignoring the pain. The \r\n bobby pin is in his hands.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, inserting the bobby pin into the keyhole, beginning to \r\n jimmy the lock.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE LOCK--it makes a SOUND--something has caught.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, excited, trying to force the bobby pin and he's doing \r\n great--until it slips from his hands, falls to the floor \r\n again.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (furious)\r\n Shit...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BOBBY PIN. Paul reaches for it. The pain has him. He \r\n reaches again, involuntarily cries out. But he grabs it, \r\n clutches it tight.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KEYHOLE. Paul is trying to jimmy the lock a second time.\r\n\r\n No luck.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. In wild frustration.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You've written how to do this--now \r\n do it!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KEYHOLE. There is a loud CLICKING sound.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOOR as Paul turns the knob. The door opens a crack.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (amazed)\r\n What do you know, it actually works.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, trying to get out of the room--but it's a bitch because \r\n in order to get to the lock he had to move the wheelchair up \r\n to the door and in order to get out, he's got to maneuver it \r\n out of the way of the door and every turn of the chair's \r\n wheels is an effort for him. He works at it and works at it, \r\n but his energy is failing him. He's pale, perspiring. Finally \r\n he succeeds, barely forces his way into the hall.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, in the hallway outside. He looks around for a phone. \r\n Doesn't see one. He wheels himself over to the front door, \r\n tries it. It's locked from the outside.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n What a surprise.\r\n\r\n He looks off into the living room, and...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TELEPHONE\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, wheeling into the living room. Dark red predominates. \r\n It's a musty room. Over the mantel, a photograph of a six-\r\n year-old ANNIE, with her mother and father in front of the \r\n family car--a new 1952 Buick. These were happier times.\r\n\r\n The windows have bars on them.\r\n\r\n As PAUL begins to wheel as fast as he can toward the phone--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PHONE as PAUL at last grabs for it, gets it, punches the \r\n \"operator\" button--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Operator...\r\n (nothing)\r\n ...OPERATOR...\r\n (wildly frustrated)\r\n ...Shit!\r\n\r\n He shakes the phone. It's terribly light. He picks it up, \r\n turns it over--it's hollow, just a shell of a telephone. He \r\n stares at it for a long moment, shaking his head, the \r\n disappointment plain.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You crazy bitch...\r\n\r\n He puts the phone back on the table.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE GENERAL STORE. DAY.\r\n\r\n Annie exits the store, carrying new paper, hops into her \r\n Cherokee and drives off.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE STUDY, as PAUL enters. He looks around.\r\n\r\n It's stuffed with heavy, graceless furniture as well as lots \r\n of coffee tables covered with knickknacks. As he, with effort, \r\n wheels across it--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A shelf of BOOKS. PAUL SHELDON books. EVERY Paul Sheldon \r\n book.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, pausing, looking at her collection. The only book on \r\n the shelf that isn't his is a large scrapbook. The title on \r\n the back reads \"My Life.\"\r\n\r\n He glances back at the shelf as he forces his wheelchair \r\n across the study, and we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A SMALL TABLE with little ceramic doodads on top. The \r\n wheelchair his it, one of the doodads topples--it's a penguin, \r\n fragile looking, and as it's about to fall to the floor and \r\n shatter--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, grabbing for it, catching it, putting it back where it \r\n was. He continues his slow way across the room and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE HALLWAY.\r\n\r\n Out in the hallway, on his way toward the kitchen, PAUL \r\n notices a door to his right. He wheels over and surprisingly \r\n it opens. However, this is not a door to the outside of the \r\n house, only a storage pantry. He looks around--nothing but \r\n canned goods, potato chips, cereals and large plastic Coke \r\n containers, etc. Just as he is about to close the door, he \r\n notices an open cardboard box. He opens the flap and sees \r\n all kinds of prescription drugs. Among them are a couple of \r\n strips of Novril encapsulated in blisters. He grabs them and \r\n stuffs them into his sweatpants. Now he closes the pantry \r\n door and heads to the kitchen.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN\r\n\r\n As PAUL approaches it. He starts to wheel his way in, but he \r\n has trouble.\r\n\r\n He backs up slightly, wheels forward again--\r\n\r\n --but the door is too narrow for the chair to fit through. \r\n He pounds his fists on the chair arm, staring as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BACK DOOR. It's at the far end of the kitchen leading to \r\n the outside. It seems somehow less formidable than the front \r\n door did. The windows around the kitchen are barred.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring at the kitchen door--\r\n\r\n --then without warning, he makes his move, starting to lower \r\n himself out of the chair\r\n\r\n gently to the floor--\r\n\r\n --only it doesn't work that way. It's too awkward, he doesn't \r\n have the strength to maneuver properly--\r\n\r\n --and his body tilts awkwardly out of the chair, slams hard \r\n against the hard floor.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, crying out in pain as he lands. He lies there for a \r\n moment. Little droplets of sweat are on his forehead now. He \r\n is hurting.\r\n\r\n He closes his eyes, gathering strength--\r\n\r\n --and then slowly, very slowly, inch by inch, he moves his \r\n body across the floor toward the kitchen door.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN DOOR. It's still a long way away.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, ignoring his pain, his awkwardness, making his body \r\n move.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN DOOR. Closer now.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, growing pale, but he won't stop, and now the door is \r\n just ahead of him, and with his good arm he reaches out and \r\n up and grabs the doorknob--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN DOOR. Locked solid.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL: CLOSE UP. The disappointment and anger is plain on his \r\n face. His arm drops. He lies still for a moment, panting \r\n from his effort. Then--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, and his eyes are wide for a moment. You can feel his \r\n wild excitement, as we\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n Sitting on the counter: A SET OF CARVING KNIVES sticking out \r\n of a slotted wooden block.\r\n\r\n They seem to be out of reach, but that doesn't stop him. He \r\n starts to crawl over to the counter.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROAD\r\n\r\n ANNIE is driving along in her Cherokee. She is heading home.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN\r\n\r\n Now at the counter, PAUL tries to pull himself up with his \r\n one good arm, but even though he is able to chin himself up \r\n to the top of the counter, he is still unable to reach the \r\n knives. He makes a desperate attempt which sends him crashing \r\n to the floor.\r\n\r\n As he starts to force his way up again--from outside there \r\n comes a sound--the motor of a car.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE ANNIE'S\r\n\r\n ANNIE, driving up to the house.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN\r\n\r\n PAUL, throwing himself back to the floor, starting a wild \r\n crawl back across the kitchen toward the wheelchair and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE ANNIE'S\r\n\r\n ANNIE, getting out of her Jeep and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n KITCHEN\r\n\r\n PAUL, crawling, crawling and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE ANNIE'S\r\n\r\n ANNIE, walking around to the back of the Jeep and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n KITCHEN\r\n\r\n PAUL, scrambling wildly up into his wheelchair, starting to \r\n get it turned and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S\r\n\r\n ANNIE, opening the back of the Jeep and lifting out several \r\n rectangular boxes of paper and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, straightened out now, forcing the wheelchair to move, \r\n and now we're into a race, a crazed life-and-death race and \r\n the cuts go fast--\r\n\r\n --and ANNIE closes the door of the car--\r\n\r\n --and PAUL is suddenly stuck, there's no traction on the rug--\r\n\r\n -- ow ANNIE, purchases in hand, starts away from the car for \r\n the house--\r\n\r\n --and now PAUL is finally moving toward the bedroom.\r\n\r\n --and ANNIE is moving swiftly toward the front door.\r\n\r\n -- he drops one of the packages of paper.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, still biting down, churning his arms with all the \r\n strength he has left. PAUL'S ARMS, aching, start to turn to \r\n rubber.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S FEET, walking quickly across the snow-covered area \r\n in front of the house and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BEDROOM DOOR as Paul gets through it, shuts it, and \r\n attacks the bedroom lock with the bobby pin and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, unlocking the front door of the house and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BEDROOM DOOR, as it locks and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE FRONT DOOR, unlocking and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE balancing the bundles under her chin as she jiggles \r\n the key out of the front door lock and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, soaked.\r\n\r\n ANNIE (V.O.)\r\n (her voice from the \r\n hallway, close and \r\n growing closer)\r\n Paul, I've got your paper.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He wheels to exactly where he was when she left him. \r\n He at last allows himself a sigh of relief.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOOR as the sound of a lock CLICKING is heard.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Just the kind you asked for.\r\n\r\n And as the door opens--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL--looking down. Paul's waistband--a half a dozen strips \r\n of Novril ominously stick out.\r\n\r\n As the door swings open, he quickly covers the Novril with \r\n this hands.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, in the doorway, a strange look on her face.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, you're dripping with \r\n perspiration, your color is very \r\n hectic--what have you been doing?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You know goddamn well what I've been \r\n doing--I'VE BEEN SITTING HERE \r\n SUFFERING. I need my pills.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (tenderly, as she \r\n starts toward him)\r\n Poor dear... Let's get you back in \r\n bed and I'll get them for you.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (exploding--a real \r\n child's tantrum)\r\n I want my pills NOW!\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It'll only take a second.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I want my pain to go 'way, Annie--\r\n make it go 'way, please Annie--\r\n (She looks at him--\r\n you can't tell if \r\n she's buying it or \r\n not)\r\n --please...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. She stares a moment more, then turns, starts for the \r\n door.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (upset)\r\n It just breaks my heart to see you\r\n like this...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL watching, and the instant she is out the door in the \r\n hallway, he stuffs the Novril into his pants.\r\n\r\n ANNIE (O.S.)\r\n (coming closer)\r\n I've done a lot of thinking on the \r\n drive...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, entering the room, the Novril in her hand. She is \r\n genuinely contrite.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n ...and I'm absolutely convinced that \r\n the main reason I've never been more \r\n popular is because of my temper. You\r\n must be so mad at me. The truth now.\r\n\r\n She hands him the pills. And rolls him over to the bed.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, I don't hold grudges. After \r\n all, who doesn't let off a little \r\n steam once in a while.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL putting the pills in his mouth, as she picks him up \r\n from the chair and puts him gently down in bed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n My genius needs his rest before he\r\n writes.\r\n\r\n She hands him a pad and pencil.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Here, in case you think of any ideas.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yeah, well I wouldn't expect too \r\n much.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't be silly. You'll be brilliant. \r\n Think of me as your inspiration.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DOORWAY, as ANNIE starts to it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I have faith in you...\r\n (beat)\r\n ...my darling...\r\n\r\n On that she turns--for the first time, a coquettish look \r\n comes to her face.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Catch this--\r\n (she throws him a \r\n kiss--it's grotesque)\r\n --ummmm-wahhhh.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, summoning up all his courage, as he mimes catching it \r\n and forces a smile on. She waves, closes the door.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON PAUL. The smile dies. He reaches in and pulls the \r\n two Novril capsules out of his mouth. Now--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SOUND OF A HELICOPTER\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE HELICOPTER\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND PILOT flying along. Buster is all bundled up as \r\n he stares out, using the binoculars...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SOMETHING SHINY reflecting the sun.\r\n\r\n HOLD AS IT ALMOST BLINDS US--we're looking at the part of \r\n Paul's Mustang that was revealed by the snow when Buster \r\n almost found the car.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (to Pilot)\r\n Walter, we could be skipping lunch \r\n today.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n CRASH SITE\r\n\r\n Paul's car being hoisted by chains from the ground and, as \r\n it starts to rise up into the afternoon air...\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n THE AREA BY THE CAR--BUSTER is there and a bunch of STATE \r\n POLICEMEN and various MEDIA PEOPLE are there--Buster stands \r\n with the STATE POLICE CHIEF watching as the car is hoisted \r\n via derrick; the sound of the powerful MOTOR lifting the car \r\n is enormous and as the car keeps rising higher and higher \r\n and PEOPLE take pictures and stare and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE STATE POLICE CHIEF is addressing maybe a dozen REPORTERS. \r\n It's very cold. BUSTER stands slightly away from the group.\r\n\r\n STATE POLICE CHIEF\r\n The presumption must now be that \r\n Paul Sheldon is dead. We know he \r\n somehow crawled out of his car. But \r\n we have been unable to locate his \r\n body in the vicinity of the crash. \r\n We also know if anyone had found \r\n him, they would have taken him to an \r\n area hospital. His body is undoubtedly \r\n out there buried somewhere in the \r\n snow. We'll find him after the first \r\n thaw--unless the animals have gotten \r\n to him first.\r\n (beat)\r\n I'll take questions.\r\n\r\n After the first sentence, a very cold and very unhappy BUSTER \r\n leaves the gathering.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S CAR as Buster studies it, especially the area by the \r\n driver's side where there are still dents visible from Annie's \r\n crowbar.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA moves to him now. They exchange a glance, start \r\n walking together toward their car.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CHIEF, surrounded--people are asking questions, raising \r\n hands for attention, and as he answers them--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND VIRGINIA, close together, walking toward their \r\n car.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n You don't think he's dead, do you?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n He might well be. But not the way \r\n they say. He didn't crawl out of \r\n that car by himself. You saw those \r\n dents on the door--someone pulled \r\n him out.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n It was an old car--those dents could \r\n have been there forever.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n There's two kinds of people that \r\n drive around in old cars: the ones \r\n that can't afford new ones, and the \r\n ones who wouldn't give 'em up for \r\n anything in the world. That second\r\n bunch don't drive around with twenty-\r\n five-year-old dents.\r\n\r\n As they drive off...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n PAUL lies in bed listening to the strains of \"The Love \r\n Connection,\" coming from upstairs. As Chuck Woolery drones \r\n on, Paul is intently involved in folding a piece of paper \r\n from his pad. He is making a container of some sort. He \r\n finishes, then reaches down and grabs the Novril capsules \r\n that he has been stashing in the mattress.\r\n\r\n Carefully, he opens one and pours it into the palm of his \r\n hand. First he smells it--no odor--then he takes a tiny bit \r\n on a finger and tastes it--no taste. Then, he takes his paper \r\n container and empties the contents of all the pills into it, \r\n then places it under the mattress.\r\n\r\n Now, what to do with the empty capsules. He thinks for a \r\n second, then--what the hell--he swallows them. He then places \r\n the packet back in the mattress.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TYPEWRITER. DAY.\r\n\r\n The window is visible behind it. From this angle, it almost \r\n seems to be staring at PAUL, broken \"n\" and all. PAUL tests \r\n his wounded arm. He's able to raise it a few inches, but \r\n that's it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE WINDOW\r\n\r\n ANNIE is visible heading for the barn, followed by MISERY, \r\n the pig. For a moment, she stops, turns to look back.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (calling out)\r\n Don't be nervous--\r\n (beat)\r\n --just remember, I'll treasure \r\n whatever you do.\r\n\r\n Now, as she turns again, moves quickly away--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TYPEWRITER\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He rolls in a piece of paper, types briefly.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n WHAT HE'S WRITTEN, AND IT'S THIS:\r\n\r\n \"Misery's Retur .\"\r\n\r\n By Paul Sheldo\r\n\r\n for A ie Wilkes.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, studying the paper. He takes it out, starts to roll in \r\n a new sheet.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MACHINE as the new sheet is rolled in.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring at the blank page. He takes a deep breath, \r\n glances outside, then back to the paper.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BLANK PAGE\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, and now there's a brief light behind his eyes and \r\n suddenly he types a burst, stares at what he's written.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PAPER and these words: \"fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He closes his eyes briefly, mutters something, kind of \r\n nods, opens his eyes, grabs for another piece of paper, rolls \r\n it in and starts mechanically to type.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n A NEW PIECE OF PAPER with the words \"Chapter Two\" and a half \r\n paragraph of writing as we\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n PAUL WORKING in his room. ANNIE enters, the first pages of \r\n manuscript in her hands. It's dusk.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'm sorry, Paul. This is all wrong, \r\n you'll have to do it over again.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (totally stunned)\r\n What? What happened to \"I'll treasure\r\n whatever you do?\"\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, it's not worthy of you. Throw \r\n it all out except for the part of \r\n naming that gravedigger after me. \r\n You can leave that in.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I really value your criticism, but \r\n maybe you're being a little hasty \r\n here.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, what you've written just isn't \r\n fair.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n --not fair?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n That's right--when I was growing up \r\n in Bakersfield, my favorite thing in \r\n all the world was to go to the movies \r\n on Saturday afternoons for the chapter \r\n plays...\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (it just comes out)\r\n --cliff-hangers--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (suddenly angry)\r\n I know that, Mister Man--they also \r\n call them serials. I'm not stupid, \r\n you know.\r\n (and she's a child \r\n again)\r\n Anyway, my favorite was Rocket Man, \r\n and once it was a no-brakes chapter, \r\n the bad guys stuck him in a car on a \r\n mountain road and knocked him out \r\n and welded the doors shut and tore \r\n out the brakes and started him to \r\n his death and he woke up and tried \r\n to steer and tried to get out, but \r\n the car went off a cliff before he \r\n could escape and it crashed and burned \r\n and--I was so upset and excited and \r\n the next week you better believe I \r\n was first in line and they always \r\n start with the end of the last week \r\n and there was Rocket Man trying to \r\n get out, and here came the cliff and \r\n JUST BEFORE the car went off he jumped \r\n free and all the kids cheered--\r\n (standing up now)\r\n --but I didn't cheer, I stood right \r\n up and started shouting, \"This isn't \r\n what happened last week--have you \r\n all got amnesia?--THEY JUST CHEATED \r\n US--THIS WASN'T FAIR--\"\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP. Still in her childhood reverie. Shouting:\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n \"HE DIDN'T GET OUT OF THE COCKADOODIE \r\n CAR!\"\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n They always cheated like that in \r\n cliff--\r\n (stops himself)\r\n --chapter plays.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n But not you. Not with my Misery. \r\n Remember, Ian did ride for Dr. Cleary \r\n at the end of the last book, but his \r\n horse fell jumping that fence and \r\n Ian broke his shoulder and his ribs \r\n and lay there all night in the ditch \r\n so he never reached the doctor, so \r\n there couldn't have been any \r\n \"experimental blood transfusion\" \r\n that saved her life. Misery was buried \r\n in the ground at the end, Paul, so \r\n you'll have to start there.\r\n\r\n As she goes--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Look at this, I've got Lizzie Borden \r\n for an editor, here.\r\n\r\n PAUL slumps, staring barefully at the typewriter.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE. NEXT MORNING.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. DAY.\r\n\r\n PAUL is at the table. He takes the Novril off his breakfast \r\n tray, wheels over to the bed, and stuffs them into the \r\n mattress. He hears FOOTSTEPS coming down the hall. He smoothly \r\n wheels back to the table. A pause.\r\n\r\n ANNIE enters to remove the tray.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What's the matter, Paul? You haven't \r\n written a word.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I can't write this anymore.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't be silly. Of course you can.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm telling you, I can't.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You can--you have the \"gotta\"--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n The what?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n The \"gotta.\" Remember, you talked \r\n about it in Playboy magazine. You \r\n said there's a million things you \r\n can't do in this world; you can't \r\n hit a curve ball, you can't fix a \r\n leaky faucet or make a marriage work-- \r\n but there's one thing you always \r\n have, and that's the power of the \r\n \"gotta.\"\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I said that?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You said you can make it so they \r\n gotta turn the page. You know, \"I \r\n 'gotta' know will she live,\" \"I\r\n 'gotta' know will he catch the \r\n killer.\" \"I gotta see how this chapter \r\n ends.\" You said it. I don't usually \r\n buy that magazine. I only got it, \r\n 'cause they were interviewing you.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL: CLOSE UP. Blinking.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (quietly)\r\n What about a bee...?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Nothing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KEYBOARD as the piece of paper slides in and the keys \r\n start to move. Annie stands there for a moment, then quietly \r\n backs out of the room.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW. It's late afternoon.\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n PAUL in the wheelchair watching as ANNIE finishes reading.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, is it fair? Should I keep going?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You better. Oh, Paul, when Ian \r\n realized that the reason they'd buried \r\n Misery alive was because the bee \r\n sting had put her in that temporary \r\n coma--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, in a fervor.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n --and when Gravedigger Wilkes \r\n remembered how thirty years earlier, \r\n the same thing had happened to Lady \r\n Evelyn-Hyde--\r\n (hands clasped)\r\n --and then old Dr. Cleary deduced \r\n that Misery must be Lady Evelyn-Hyde's \r\n long-lost daughter because of the \r\n rarity of deadly bee-stings--my heart \r\n just leapt.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, watching her. It's as if he had nothing to do with \r\n anything she's read as she goes on.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I've known from the very first book \r\n that Misery had to be born of nobility \r\n and I was right!\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (mumbling to himself)\r\n Yeah, yeah...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TWO OF THEM; she touches the pages as if they were gold, \r\n rubbing gently with the tips of her fingers.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul, can I read each chapter \r\n when you finish? I can fill in the \r\n \"n\"s.\r\n (Paul nods, and she's \r\n off again)\r\n Will she be her old self, now that \r\n Ian has dug her out, or will she \r\n have amnesia...?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n ...have to wait.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Will she still love him with that \r\n special perfect love?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Have to wait.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (plead ing)\r\n Not even a hint?\r\n\r\n Paul shakes his head.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, spinning around the room like a happy child.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Misery's alive! Misery's alive. Oh, \r\n it's so romantic--this whole house \r\n is going to be filled with romance. \r\n I'm going to put on my Liberace \r\n records--\r\n (Stops, looks at Paul)\r\n --you do like Liberace, don't you?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (quickly)\r\n Whenever he played Radio City, who \r\n do you think was right there in the\r\n front row?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'm going to play my records all day\r\n\r\n LONG\r\n --to inspire you--he's my all-time \r\n favorite.\r\n\r\n And with that, she starts to leave.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie?\r\n\r\n She stops at the door.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Would you have dinner with me tonight?\r\n\r\n She can't speak.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n To celebrate Misery's return. I \r\n couldn't have done it without you.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul. It would be an honor.\r\n\r\n ANNIE dashes excitedly out of the room. PAUL wheels over to \r\n the bed, pulls the packet of Novril powder out from the \r\n mattress and stuffs it in his pants. The sound of Liberace \r\n playing \"Tammy\" with orchestra and chorus booms in from beyond \r\n the door.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Jesus Christ.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S OFFICE. DUSK.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA is on the phone.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n (into phone)\r\n No, he's not here. I don't know where \r\n he went. He never tells me anything \r\n anymore. He's probably out having an \r\n affair somewhere. Wait a minute. I \r\n think I hear him coming.\r\n\r\n BUSTER enters carrying a bagful of books.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n (to Buster)\r\n It's Jim Taylor. He wants to know \r\n who you've been having an affair \r\n with.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. He puts the bag down, shoots Virginia a look and \r\n grabs the phone. VIRGINIA looks in the bag.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Hey, Jim, what's doing? Uh-huh... uh-\r\n huh... Jim, we've been over this. If \r\n you're gonna have benches in front \r\n of your store, people are gonna sit \r\n on them. I don't like him either, \r\n but I'm not going to come over there \r\n and tell him to move. Give my best \r\n to Denise. Bye.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n (looking through the \r\n books; all paperback \r\n Misery novels)\r\n Well, whoever she is, she sure likes \r\n to read a lot.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Virginia, I'm flattered you think I \r\n got that much energy. I just figured \r\n if I can't find Paul Sheldon, at \r\n least I can find out what he wrote \r\n about.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n What do you expect to find? A story \r\n about a guy who drove his car off a \r\n cliff in a snowstorm?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Now, you see, it's that kind of \r\n sarcasm that's given our marriage\r\n real spice.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n STUDY. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n PAUL is sitting at a table that Annie has set up with her \r\n best china and silverware. It is as romantic as Annie Wilkes \r\n gets. ANNIE enters, carrying a basket of rolls. She sits and \r\n serves Paul.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I hope you like it.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It looks wonderful. And so do you.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh...\r\n\r\n They eat in awkward silence. Finally:\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I've never had meatloaf this good,\r\n what do you do to it?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n My secret is I only use fresh \r\n tomatoes, never canned. And to give \r\n it that little extra zip, I mix in\r\n some Spam with the ground beef.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Oh.\r\n (pause)\r\n You can't get this in a restaurant \r\n in New York.\r\n\r\n After another pause:\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, I think we should have a toast.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n A toast?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yes, to Misery. Let me pour you some\r\n more wine.\r\n\r\n Paul pours more of the Gallo wine, then raises his glass.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n To Misery.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Wait, let's do this right. Do you \r\n have any candles?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, I don't know. I think so. I'll \r\n go look.\r\n\r\n She exits into the kitchen. PAUL quickly pulls the packet \r\n filled with Novril powder from his pants. He empties it into \r\n her glass of wine, stuffs the empty packet back into his \r\n pants, talking the whole time:\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Did you study decorating, or do you \r\n just have a flair?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, you. I just picked things up \r\n over the years.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Well, it certainly says you.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You really think so?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Absolutely. Listen, if you can't \r\n find any, it's okay. I just thought\r\n it might be nice.\r\n\r\n ANNIE re-enters with a candle.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Are you kidding? If anyone ever told \r\n me that one day I'd be having a \r\n candlelit dinner with Paul Sheldon \r\n in my own house, I woulda checked \r\n both legs to see which one was being \r\n pulled. Will this do?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It's perfect.\r\n\r\n She places the candle on the table. With a slight tremor in \r\n her hand, she lights the candle. PAUL raises his glass.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n To Misery and Annie Wilkes, who \r\n brought her back to life.\r\n\r\n ANNIE raises her glass.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul, every time I think about \r\n it, I get goosebumps.\r\n\r\n They clink glasses.\r\n\r\n And with that, her emotions having gotten the best of her, \r\n she knocks over the candle. In trying to right the situation, \r\n she places her glass back down, and as she reaches for the \r\n candle, she knocks over her glass, spilling the wine.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (wiping up the spilled \r\n wine with her napkin)\r\n Oh, God, what have I done? I'm so \r\n sorry, Paul. I ruined your beautiful \r\n toast. Will you ever forgive me? \r\n Here, let me pour another one.\r\n (she does)\r\n Can we pretend this never happened? \r\n To Misery?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n To Misery.\r\n\r\n So they drink their wine.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE. DAY.\r\n\r\n The snow, although still present, has melted somewhat. And \r\n starting now and continuing throughout is this: the sound of \r\n typing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL, working at his typewriter.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MANUSCRIPT. Growing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S BEDROOM. DUSK.\r\n\r\n ANNIE, in her room. Reading and loving it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S DEN. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n BUSTER sitting in his den reading a Misery novel by the fire. \r\n VIRGINIA brings him a cup of tea.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. DAY.\r\n\r\n PAUL, the sling off, moving his injured arm. It's more mobile \r\n than before. Testing his strength, he uses his arm to remove \r\n the page and place it on the pile. He puts in another page \r\n and continues to type.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, entering Paul's room, carrying a chapter. Handing him \r\n a cup of tea.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, this is positively the best \r\n Misery you've ever written.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I think you're right.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PILE OF PAPER. Bigger.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE BARN\r\n\r\n ANNIE, out by the barn. She stares in at the house. Framed \r\n in the window is PAUL, working. She smiles, enters the barn.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n He stretches but only briefly, then back to his typing.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN\r\n\r\n ANNIE, cooking happily away, reading a chapter.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL, arm out of the sling. He manages to lift the typewriter \r\n once, sets it back down, puts the sling back on.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. LATER.\r\n\r\n ANNIE, bringing a tray of food.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I think it's so wonderful that Misery \r\n would sacrifice her title to take up \r\n the cause of her people. That's true \r\n nobility.\r\n\r\n Paul hands her some new pages. As she exits,\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER'S OFFICE\r\n\r\n BUSTER, in his office reading. He is alone.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S LIVING ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n Annie is reading by the fire. Her pig Misery sits beside \r\n her, staring at the pages.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. DAY.\r\n\r\n His fingers just fly, faster than he's ever typed and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n Paul, staring and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PILE, growing, growing and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S FINGERS\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL, ripping open a new ream of paper...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. DUSK.\r\n\r\n His lips move silently. He's not even aware of it as he nods \r\n and...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PAPER IN THE TYPEWRITER, line after line being written.\r\n\r\n INTERCUT WITH:\r\n\r\n Paul's face at DAY, NIGHT, and DUSK in rapid succession, \r\n ending with\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S FARMHOUSE. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n Lightning! Giant deep rolls of THUNDER as RAIN begins...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n TYPEWRITER being lifted out of frame, then back in, then out \r\n again.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n The pile of manuscript has doubled. Maybe two hundred pages.\r\n\r\n PAUL, with some effort, is pumping the typewriter up and \r\n down. Finally, he places it back down and puts his arm back \r\n in the sling.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, looking outside breifly.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE RAIN. Worse. The SOUND hit s the roof of the house, hits \r\n the window.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, lumbering in--she's never looked like this: She's \r\n wearing her slippers and her pink quilted housecoat. Her \r\n eyes are without life. Her hair, loose and straggly, hangs \r\n around her face. Slowly, like a robot, she goes to PAUL, \r\n who looks silently up at her.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Here's your pills.\r\n\r\n She drops them on the table.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, as the pills hit his chest and bounce into his lap.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, what is it?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (half turns away, \r\n turns back, gestures \r\n outside)\r\n The rain... sometimes it gives me \r\n the blues.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP. And suddenly it's as if she's been turned \r\n off, gone lifeless.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring at her. No sound but the rain.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, seen straight on. No light in her eyes.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n When you first came here, I only \r\n loved the writer part of Paul Sheldon. \r\n But now I know I love the rest of \r\n him too. As much as Misery loves \r\n Ian.\r\n (beat)\r\n I know you don't love me--don't say \r\n you do--you're a beautiful, brilliant, \r\n famous man of the world; and I'm...not \r\n a movie star type. You'll never know \r\n the fear of losing someone like you \r\n if you're someone like me.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Why would you lose me?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n The book is almost finished. Your \r\n legs are getting better. Soon you'll \r\n be able to walk. You'll be wanting\r\n to leave.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Why would I want to leave? I like it\r\n here.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n That's very kind of you, but I'll \r\n bet it's not altogether true.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It is.\r\n\r\n She slowly reaches into the pocket of her bathrobe and pulls \r\n out a .38 Special.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I have this gun, and sometimes I \r\n think about using it.\r\n\r\n She is absentmindedly clicking the empty gun.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I better go now. I might put bullets \r\n in it.\r\n\r\n Robot-like, she crosses to the door and leaves. As she closes \r\n and locks the door--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, stunned, listening, waiting--\r\n\r\n --here is the sound of the front door closing--\r\n\r\n --then footsteps on the outside walk--\r\n\r\n --the sound of a car door opening and slamming shut.\r\n\r\n Now comes the GUNNING of the motor.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW as ANNIE drives by, hunched over the wheel. The \r\n MOTOR sound grows fainter, faint...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND VIRGINIA'S BEDROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n BUSTER AND VIRGINIA are lying in bed. Buster is reading yet \r\n another Misery novel, Misery's Trial. Virginia is also \r\n reading.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n \"There is a justice higher than that \r\n of man. I will be judged by Him.\"\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n What?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n They're hauling Misery into court.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n That's nice.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (mutters under his \r\n breath)\r\n \"There is a justice higher than that \r\n of man--I will be judged by Him.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE'S KITCHEN.\r\n\r\n The kitchen KNIVES on the counter.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, now using both arms, forcing his body up toward them.\r\n\r\n This isn't easy, it was a bitch the first time he tried it, \r\n but nothing's going to stop him now. He's leaning against \r\n the cupboard, using it for balance--\r\n\r\n --his balance starts to go but he won't let it as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KNIVES, AS HIS HAND grabs the largest one, a fat-handled \r\n sharp beauty and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, and you can sense the relief as he begins to lower \r\n himself to the floor.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE STUDY\r\n\r\n PAUL, back in his wheelchair, knife in his lap, carefully \r\n opening drawers of little tables, looking inside. He closes \r\n them, moves on, unmindful of the rain. Now--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE SHELF OF PAUL SHELDON BOOKS. As before--\r\n\r\n --except the \"My Life\" scrapbook is gone.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, glancing around--\r\n\r\n --and there it is, on a coffee table in the living room. \r\n Also on the table are a roll of Scotch tape, a pair of \r\n scissors, and a copy of Newsweek. Paul wheels toward the \r\n table and the book, which is as big as a folio Shakespeare \r\n play and as thick as a family Bible.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE LIVING ROOM\r\n\r\n PAUL, opening the book.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE FIRST PAGE OF THE BOOK, as Paul opens it. It's a newspaper \r\n clipping as is almost all of what follows. A small article: \r\n simply a birth announcement for Anne Marie Wilkes.\r\n\r\n PAUL turns the page. This headline reads: \"Investment Banker \r\n Carl Wilkes Dies in Freak Fall.\"\r\n\r\n \"USC Nursing Student Dies in Freak Fall.\" That's the headline \r\n on the next page.\r\n\r\n Now: \"Miss Wilkes is Nursing School Honors Graduate.\"\r\n\r\n Paul turns the page.\r\n\r\n Manchester, New Hampshire, Union Leader: \"Ernest Gonyar, 79, \r\n Dies After Long Illness.\"\r\n\r\n Now that phrase seems to be what catches our eye--\"after \r\n long illness\" is from the next article. \"Long illness\" from \r\n the one after that. Then, on the next page, a variation: \r\n \"Short Illness.\"\r\n\r\n Now we're in Pennsylvania: \"New Hospital Staff Announced.\"\r\n\r\n And here come those phrases again on page after page--\"After \r\n Long Illness.\" \"After Long Illness.\"\r\n\r\n \"After Long Illness.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, transfixed; he keeps on turning the pages--the states \r\n keep changing, moving west. Pennsylvania to Minnesota, \r\n Minnesota to North Dakota. And always the clippings reporting \r\n deaths and deaths and--\r\n\r\n --and now we're in Colorado. \"NEW HEAD MATERNITY NURSE NAMED.\" \r\n And now the dead are young and helpless; babies. More and \r\n more of them.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (stunned)\r\n Holy shit.\r\n\r\n Then a headline which reads:\r\n\r\n \"HEAD MATERNITY NURSE QUESTIONED ON INFANT DEATHS\"\r\n\r\n Next page: \"MISS WILKES RELEASED.\"\r\n\r\n Next page: \"THREE MORE INFANTS DIE.\"\r\n\r\n Next page, at last: \"DRAGON LADY ARRESTED.\"\r\n\r\n Then a photo: the front page of the Rocky Mountain Gazette. \r\n Annie on the courthouse steps. \"DRAGON LADY CLAIMS INNOCENCE,\" \r\n under which there is a statement by Annie Wilkes.\r\n\r\n Paul turns quickly to the next page and a very large headline:\r\n\r\n \"DRAGON LADY FOUND NOT GUILTY\"\r\n\r\n PAUL just sits there, shaking his head in bewilderment.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE BOOK, as Paul turns the LAST page.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, stunned and now we find out why, as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE PAGE IN THE BOOK. It's an article from Newsweek magazine, \r\n a picture of Paul's car being hauled up out of the snow. \r\n Above it this caption: \"Presumed Dead--Paul Sheldon.\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. Slamming the book shut, putting it back on the coffee \r\n table, then quickly turning his wheelchair as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, steering his wheelchair toward the front door. He tries \r\n to position himself for a surprise attack of ANNIE, but he \r\n can't find a way to get close enough. The wheelchair is too \r\n cumbersome. He looks around and decides to head back to his \r\n room. He is faced with the same problem there--so he struggles \r\n into bed and, lying on his back, he rests the knife on his \r\n chest and stares up at the ceiling.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S WINDOW, hours later. The rain has stopped.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL--trying to stay awake. After a few beats, he hears \r\n something. It's the sound of a CAR PULLING UP.\r\n\r\n HEADLIGHTS can be seen flashing through the window. PAUL \r\n grips the knife and hides it under the covers. The sound of \r\n a CAR DOOR OPENING AND CLOSING, then FOOTSTEPS.\r\n\r\n As the FRONT DOOR OPENS, PAUL girds himself for attack. THE \r\n FRONT DOOR CLOSES, then a couple of FOOTSTEPS. Then silence. \r\n Then the FOOTSTEPS continue down the hall and up the stairs.\r\n\r\n After a beat, we hear the TELEVISION. Someone is explaining \r\n how you can buy millions of dollars of prime real estate \r\n with no money down.\r\n\r\n PAUL, allowing himself to relax, slips the knife under the \r\n mattress. As the TV DRONES ON, Paul lies staring up at the \r\n ceiling.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n We hear a clap of THUNDER and once again the rain pours down.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n CLOSE UP: PAUL--eyes closed. There is another loud THUNDERCLAP \r\n which causes Paul to stir and open his eyes.\r\n\r\n He turns his head and another CLAP OF THUNDER is heard, \r\n LIGHTNING flashes and reveals ANNIE standing over his bed.\r\n\r\n Before he can react, she jabs a needle into his arm, pulls \r\n it out and starts out of the room.\r\n\r\n PAUL tries to raise himself, but the power of the drug causes \r\n him to collapse, unconscious.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROOM. EARLY MORNING.\r\n\r\n It's stopped raining, PAUL lies asleep. Now, surprisingly, \r\n we hear a VOICE we've never heard in the movie before--loud--\r\n for an instant we don't recognize the voice, then we do: \r\n It's LIBERACE talking to his audience on a record going, \r\n \"Thank you, thank you, what a wonderful thing it is for me \r\n to be back with you in Paris...\" PAUL stirs and awakens to \r\n discover that he is strapped to his bed. He can move his \r\n arms, but that's it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, standing in the room, and she looks very together; \r\n her eyes are bright. Too bright. Way too bright.\r\n\r\n She comes to the foot of his bed.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, groggy from being drugged, tries to clear the cobwebs.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (in a soft voice)\r\n Paul, I know you've been out.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n What?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You've been out of your room.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n No, I haven't.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, my little ceramic penguin in \r\n the study always faces due south.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't know what you're talking \r\n about.\r\n\r\n PAUL looks up at her--he is totally honest and sincere. As \r\n he talks, his hand surreptitiously begins moving toward the \r\n mattress edge.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, as she brings the fat-hand led knife out of her skirt \r\n pocket.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Is this what you're looking for? I \r\n know you've been out twice, Paul. At \r\n first, I couldn't figure out how you \r\n did it, but last night I found your \r\n key.\r\n (She holds up the \r\n bobby pin)\r\n I know I left my scrapbook out, and \r\n I can imagine what you might be \r\n thinking of me. But you see, Paul, \r\n it's all okay.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, as she walks slowly back to the foot of the bed.\r\n\r\n And now a THUMP comes from the foot of the bed. Something is \r\n out of sight.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring at her; waiting.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Last night it came so clear. I realize \r\n you just need more time. Eventually, \r\n you'll come to accept the idea of \r\n being here. Paul, do you know about \r\n the early days at the Kimberly Diamond \r\n Mine? Do you know what they did to \r\n the native workers who stole diamonds? \r\n Don't worry, they didn't kill them. \r\n That would be like junking a Mercedes \r\n just because it had a broken spring--\r\n no, if they caught them they had to \r\n make sure they could go on working, \r\n but they also had to make sure they \r\n could never run away. The operation \r\n was called hobbling.\r\n\r\n And with that, she reaches down out of sight and comes up \r\n holding a 16-inch piece of 4 x 4 wood.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, whatever you're thinking about, \r\n don't do it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. She wedges the 4 x 4 firmly between his legs, just \r\n above the ankles, secures it and adjusts his feet.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Now don't fuss, Paul.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Why would I run away? I'm a writer, \r\n Annie--it's all I am--and I've never \r\n written this well--even you said \r\n that this is my best, didn't you?\r\n\r\n ANNIE picks up a sledgehammer.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Didn't you? Why would I leave a place \r\n where I'm doing my best work? It \r\n doesn't make any sense.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, positioning herself to the side of his right ankle.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Shh, darling, trust me--\r\n (taking aim at his \r\n ankle)\r\n It's for the best.\r\n\r\n She takes the sledgehammer back.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Annie, for God's sake, please.\r\n\r\n As ANNIE swings, the sledgehammer makes contact with the \r\n ankle. It breaks with a sharp CRACK.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL: CLOSE UP, shrieking.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, moving to the other side of the bed.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Almost done, just one more.\r\n\r\n And as she breaks the other ankle, PAUL shrieks even louder.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE: CLOSE UP.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n God, I love you...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S FACE. He is beyond agony.\r\n\r\n FADE TO BLACK:\r\n\r\n For a long moment, nothing.\r\n\r\n Then... a FAINT SOUND. After a moment, it begins to become \r\n more intrusive and we can tell what it is: a car horn HONKING.\r\n\r\n FADE IN ON:\r\n\r\n SILVER CREEK and ANNIE in her Cherokee, HONKING for another \r\n car to get a move on.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A HAND AND A COIN MOVING ACROSS IT, from finger to finger.\r\n\r\n PULL BACK TO REVEAL\r\n\r\n BUSTER, sitting by the front window of his office, reading \r\n The Rocky Mountain Gazette.\r\n\r\n He watches idly as ANNIE yells out the window to the car in \r\n front of her. THE DRIVER of the car yells back. Annie yells \r\n louder. The Driver guns off, and Annie pulls into the parking \r\n space next to the General Store.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, getting out, shaking a fist at the other car, calling \r\n out, \"You poop!\" She enters the store.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, staring straight ahead. Something is gnawing at him.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA, in his office, tidying the desk. BUSTER enters, \r\n looks angry.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Just leave it, all right?\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n Oh, I like that tone.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n How many times do I have to tell you--\r\n I have a system here.\r\n (rooting through a \r\n pile of papers)\r\n Where the hell is that thing?\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n What thing?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n That thing.\r\n (finding what he's \r\n looking for, a 3 x 5 \r\n card)\r\n Here it is. Right where it's supposed \r\n to be.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n What is it?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I'm not sure. Maybe nothing.\r\n\r\n VIRGINIA\r\n It's good you found it.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n There's that spice again.\r\n\r\n As BUSTER leaves, VIRGINIA goes back to tidying the desk.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A LARGE LIBRARY as Buster leaves his car, hurries inside and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n LIBRARY STACKS\r\n\r\n BUSTER, wearing bifocals, sits poring over bound volumes of \r\n The Rocky Mountain Gazette.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, frustrated, puts one set of volumes down, picks up \r\n another, starts through it, as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN GAZETTE, as the pages turn.\r\n\r\n --only now they stop moving.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, tense, adjusting his bifocals.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A SERIES OF HEADLINES pertaining to Annie Wilkes' murder \r\n trial.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A HEADLINE which reads, \"DRAGON LADY CLAIMS INNOCENCE.\"\r\n\r\n Under a PICTURE OF ANNIE on the courthouse steps, we see a \r\n CAPTION: \"Wilkes told reporters on the courthouse steps, \r\n 'There is a higher justice than that of man; I will be judged \r\n by Him.'\"\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. He takes the 3 x 5 card out of his pocket.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n The CARD--on it is printed the exact quote we just saw in \r\n the paper.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, sitting there, staring at the quote.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Interesting.\r\n\r\n HOLD ON HIS FACE, then--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, carrying a bag of feed, followed by MISERY, the sow, \r\n comes into view. She slows, smiles, waves--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Hi, Punkin.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring out at her.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Give us a smile?\r\n (Paul gives her the \r\n finger. She laughs)\r\n Such a kidder.\r\n\r\n As she exits our view--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, lifting the typewriter and repeatedly raising it over \r\n his head, this time without any difficulty.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE GENERAL STORE IN SILVER CREEK. EARLY AFTERNOON.\r\n\r\n BUSTER enters. The place is empty. It's one of those wonderful \r\n spots that stocks pretty much everything in what seems like \r\n complete disarray. Buster goes to the coffee urn behind the \r\n counter, helps himself. He speaks to the guy who sits behind \r\n the counter nearby; these two have known each other forever.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Hey, Pete.\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n Buster.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Answer me a couple things?\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n If I can.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Do you have any of those new Paul \r\n Sheldon books?\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n We had a batch. Sold 'em all in three \r\n days.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n You wouldn't happen to remember if \r\n Miz Wilkes bought one, would you?\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n Are you kidding? Every time that \r\n fella writes a book, she makes me \r\n set aside the first copy.\r\n\r\n BUSTER opens the cash register, drops his coffee money inside, \r\n closes the register.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Has she been buying any odd things \r\n lately?\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n Miz Wilkes? Same old stuff.\r\n (beat)\r\n --Lest you call paper odd.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Newspapers?\r\n\r\n PETE\r\n (mimes typing)\r\n No, the typing kind.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER: CLOSE UP\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Oh. That kind. Nothing odd about \r\n that.\r\n\r\n He cannot hide his excitement now as we--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, entering Paul's room. He lies back in the wheelchair, \r\n eyes closed. Liberace music playing in the background. From \r\n the start, PAUL'S TONE is different--strong, he's in control.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, don't you think it's time for \r\n you to start writing again? It's \r\n been over a week.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't know, it's weird, but a couple \r\n of broken bones hasn't done a lot \r\n for my creative juices. Get the fuck \r\n out of here.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't talk to me like that.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (staring at her now)\r\n Why, what are you going to do?\r\n (spreading his arms \r\n wide)\r\n Kill me? Take your best shot.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (taken aback)\r\n Why are you so mean, Mister you'd-be-\r\n dead-in-the-snow-if-it-wasn't-for-\r\n me?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Oh, no reason, you keep me prisoner, \r\n you make me burn my book, you drive \r\n a sledgehammer into my ankles...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'll drive a sledgehammer into your \r\n man-gland if you're not nicer--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (He spreads his legs)\r\n Be my guest.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (after a beat)\r\n That's disgusting.\r\n\r\n As she exits.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n A ROAD. Empty. Hold for a moment--now a car appears around a \r\n curve.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CAR. BUSTER is driving fast.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL in his room. He sits as before, by the window. He doesn't \r\n move. Now he closes his eyes, stretches, sighs as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE KITCHEN\r\n\r\n ANNIE, busily making cocoa.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER IN HIS CAR. He stops at a mailbox. The name on the \r\n box is WILKES. Buster turns his car slowly into the driveway \r\n by the mailbox.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He yawns, opens his eyes briefly. Closes them. In the \r\n distance now, growing more and more visible is Buster's car--\r\n\r\n --and now PAUL'S EYES go open wide, and he's staring out the \r\n window at the car as it keeps on coming, closer, closer and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, looking around. He's driving very slowly, carefully.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. Fixating on the window and now it's all going to be \r\n all right, everything's going to be all right--\r\n\r\n --and then ANNIE is on him, hypodermic needle in hand, jabbing \r\n it into his arm. He desperately tries to fight her off, but \r\n the drug starts to take hold. He tries to grab her by the \r\n neck, but she fights him off as she wheels him out of the \r\n room, down the hall and towards the cellar door.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I don't think I'll ever understand \r\n you. I cook your meals, I tend to \r\n you practically twenty-four hours a \r\n day, and you continue to fight me. \r\n When are we going to develop a sense \r\n of trust?\r\n\r\n ANNIE opens the cellar door. PAUL is all but limp by now. As \r\n she picks him up and starts to carry him down the steps--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER pulling up in front of the house. As he gets out of \r\n his car--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE placing Paul on the cellar floor and heading up the \r\n stairs. PAUL is out.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER heading up the steps to the front door.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE stashing the wheelchair in the hall closet. She crosses \r\n to the front door, opens it, revealing BUSTER.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (Gasping)\r\n Oh, my!\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Sorry, didn't mean to startle you. \r\n You didn't give me a chance to knock.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (all charm)\r\n Guess you can tell from my reaction, \r\n I'm not all that used to visitors \r\n out here. What can I do for you?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I was just wondering if you happen \r\n to know anything about Paul Sheldon.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (stammering)\r\n What do you want to know?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Anything you can tell me might help.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. The words pour out--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Well, he was born in Worcester, \r\n Massachusetts, forty-two years ago, \r\n the only child of Franklin and Helene \r\n Sheldon, mediocre student, majored \r\n in history...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, watching her, surprised.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n (cutting in)\r\n Excuse me, that's not exactly the \r\n kind of information I was after. You \r\n see, he's been missing for quite \r\n some time now, and...\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I know. It's so upsetting. I'm his \r\n number-one fan...I've got all his \r\n books, every sentence he ever put \r\n down. I'm so proud of my Paul Sheldon \r\n collection...\r\n (stops suddenly, almost \r\n embarrassed)\r\n ...here I am, prattling on and my \r\n manners have just flown away. I \r\n haven't invited you in. Please.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Thank you.\r\n\r\n ANNIE lets BUSTER in, closes the door. They linger in front \r\n of Paul's door. Buster idly checks out the hallway.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n 'Course you must know about that \r\n horrible accident.\r\n\r\n BUSTER nods and wanders into the living room. ANNIE follows. \r\n He crosses into the study and checks out a bookcase that \r\n contains the complete works of Paul Sheldon. One shelf below \r\n contains Annie's infamous scrapbook.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Almost killed me, too. I prayed when \r\n I heard the news. I got down on my \r\n knees and begged for it not to be \r\n true.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. She's so moved. Buster wanders into the kitchen.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n You're going to laugh at what I'm \r\n about to say, but go ahead, I don't \r\n care...\r\n (beat)\r\n ...when I was praying, God told me \r\n to get ready.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER, watching her. This isn't at all what he expected.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Get ready for what?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, trying to fight the drug; just his eyes flutter.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE and BUSTER heading back down the hallway toward Paul's \r\n room.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n To try and be his replacement--he \r\n gave so much pleasure to so many \r\n people and there's a shortage of \r\n pleasure on this planet these days, \r\n in case you hadn't noticed.\r\n\r\n BUSTER enters Paul's room. ANNIE follows.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n God told me, since I was his number-\r\n one fan, that I should make up new \r\n stories as if I was Paul Sheldon. \r\n So, went to town. And I bought a \r\n typewriter. And paper to type on. \r\n The same kind Paul Sheldon used. And \r\n I turned the guest bedroom into a \r\n writing studio. Would you like to \r\n see it?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Sure.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It's right this way.\r\n\r\n BUSTER takes a look in the bathroom. ANNIE waits for him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n It's right here. I knew how he wrote, \r\n the kinds of words he used, the \r\n wonderful stories he told--\r\n (moved)\r\n --I've spent the last four weeks \r\n trying to write like Paul Sheldon.\r\n (sad shake of the \r\n head)\r\n But I can't do it right. I try and I \r\n try and I know all the words--\r\n (eyes closed in despair)\r\n --but it's just not the same.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. He just stands there, watches her.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Well...\r\n (long pause)\r\n ...maybe it takes time to get the \r\n hang of it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (holding up pages \r\n from the manuscript)\r\n I could give you a couple of hundred \r\n pages of mine, and you could tell me \r\n what you think.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I'm not much of a critic.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Well, I just thought--oh, look at \r\n me. You'd think I'd never had a house \r\n guest before. Would you like something \r\n to drink?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Sure.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n How does a nice cup of cocoa sound?\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Sounds good.\r\n\r\n As she exits into the kitchen.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n There's some already made.\r\n\r\n BUSTER lingers in Paul's room for a beat, then goes into the \r\n hallway.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Must get lonely, living out here all \r\n by yourself.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I always say if you can't enjoy your \r\n own company, you're not fit company \r\n for anyone else.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n You got a point there...\r\n\r\n As Buster moves up the stairs--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, still fighting the drug. His arm twitches almost \r\n involuntarily, grazing the barbecue.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER opening the door to Annie's room. He looks around and \r\n just as he is about to turn to leave--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, standing right in front of him.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Here you are.\r\n\r\n BUSTER heads down the stairs, ANNIE follows.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Thanks, Miz Wilkes, but I don't want \r\n to take up any more of your time. I \r\n best be going.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n But you didn't even taste your cocoa.\r\n\r\n They cross to the front door.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n I'm sure it's wonderful, but really \r\n should be getting back.\r\n\r\n BUSTER opens the door.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL stirring.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER and ANNIE at the door.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n If you don't mind, perhaps I could \r\n pay you another visit sometime.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'd be delighted. Now that you know \r\n the way...\r\n\r\n With that, she closes the door. We stay with BUSTER. He stands \r\n on the front porch for a beat, thinking, then starts heading \r\n down the porch steps. Just as he reaches about halfway down, \r\n we HEAR A LOUD CRASH coming from inside the house.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL--he has managed to partially fight his way through the \r\n drug, and in waking has accidentally knocked over the \r\n barbecue. He fights to clear the cobwebs.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Miz Wilkes, are you all right?\r\n\r\n There is no answer. He quietly moves into the house.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Miz Wilkes?\r\n\r\n Again, no answer.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, still fighting to gain complete consciousness.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (weakly)\r\n Here. I'm down here. Down here.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n BUSTER. Hearing Paul's muffled call for help, he tracks the \r\n sound to the cellar door. As PAUL continues to call out, \r\n Buster looks around, sees no one, and opens the cellar door. \r\n The shaft of light from the open door pours down on Paul, \r\n who is still lying on the floor.\r\n\r\n BUSTER\r\n Mr. Sheldon?\r\n\r\n But before Paul can answer, there's the sound of a LOUD \r\n EXPLOSION. Seemingly from nowhere a hole is ripped through \r\n Buster's chest, knocking him out of frame, revealing Annie, \r\n smoking shotgun in hand, standing at the top of the cellar \r\n steps.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Don't feel bad, Paul. It had to \r\n happen. I've been waiting for this \r\n sign.\r\n\r\n ANNIE walks toward BUSTER'S BODY and very casually takes his \r\n gun out of its holster.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I've known for some time why I was \r\n chosen to save you. You and I were \r\n meant to be together forever. But \r\n now our time in this world must end. \r\n But don't worry, Paul. I've already \r\n prepared for what must be done. I \r\n put two bullets in my gun, one for \r\n you and one for me. Oh, darling, it \r\n will be so beautiful.\r\n\r\n With that, ANNIE turns and exits the cellar.\r\n\r\n Paul's mind races desperately. He looks at the barbecue again. \r\n Next to it is a messy table with a dozen jars and cans on \r\n it.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TABLE. One of the cans is LIGHTER FLUID.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. He stares at it for a moment. An idea hits him--\r\n\r\n --now, PAUL struggles and crawls over to the table. He grabs \r\n the lighter fluid in his hands, jams it into the rear of his \r\n pants and scrambles back to where ANNIE left him.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE returning with her .38 Special and a hypodermic needle. \r\n She stops at the top of the stairs.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Now don't be afraid. I love you.\r\n\r\n She starts toward him.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I know you do. I love you too, Annie.\r\n (this stops her)\r\n And you're right. We are meant to be \r\n together. And I know we must die. \r\n But it must be so that Misery can \r\n live. We have the power to give Misery \r\n eternal life. We must finish the \r\n book.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n But the time is now. Soon others \r\n will come.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It's almost done. By dawn we'll be \r\n able to give Misery back to the world.\r\n\r\n ANNIE stares at Paul. She could go either way on this. Then, \r\n without a word, she turns and goes back up the stairs.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Here, Paul. I'll fix you something \r\n to eat.\r\n\r\n She exits. PAUL hesitates for a moment, then realizes he has \r\n no choice. He starts dragging himself over BUSTER and up the \r\n stairs.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. NIGHT.\r\n\r\n PAUL working. Typing like a madman, totally concentrated on \r\n the white paper. His lips move but he's not even aware of \r\n it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE enters quietly, holding a few pages.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul. It's beautiful.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Three more chapters to go.\r\n\r\n She looks at him now, enthralled.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n The stranger staying at the Inn, is \r\n he someone from Misery's past?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Maybe.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n This is so exciting. It's Windthorne, \r\n her first love, right?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Maybe. Are you ready for the next \r\n chapter?\r\n\r\n He taunts her with it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (brimming with \r\n enthusiasm)\r\n Oh you!\r\n\r\n She takes the pages and goes.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. LATER.\r\n\r\n PAUL types a moment then rips out the page and starts over.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, putting the coffee down for him, putting the pages \r\n back on the main pile.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (more excited now \r\n than the last time)\r\n It WAS Windthorne. I knew it--what \r\n does that do to her love for Ian?--\r\n (thinks)\r\n --of course, if she hadn't thought \r\n Windthorne was murdered she never \r\n would have fallen in love with Ian \r\n in the first place.\r\n (Paul glares at her, \r\n she turns to the \r\n door)\r\n Sorry, it's just that this is so \r\n wonderful.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm glad you like it.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, this will be our legacy.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It will.\r\n\r\n He hands her a few more pages, she starts reading as she \r\n exits.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM. MUCH LATER.\r\n\r\n PAUL rubs his eyes. For a moment, he sags, but he fights it. \r\n He puts a clean page into the typewriter.\r\n\r\n ANNIE bursts in.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul. I'm dying. Does she wind \r\n up with Ian or Windthorne? You have \r\n to tell me.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You'll know very soon. I'm starting \r\n the last chapter. And when I finish, \r\n I want everything to be perfect. \r\n I'll require three things.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n What things?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You don't know?\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (smiling)\r\n I was fooling, silly.\r\n (ticking them off)\r\n You need a cigarette, because you \r\n used to smoke but you quit except \r\n when you finish a book, and you just \r\n have one, and the match is to light \r\n it. And you need one glass of \r\n champagne.\r\n (thinks)\r\n Dome Pear-igg-non.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Dome Pear-igg-non it is.\r\n\r\n AS ANNIE exits.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE WINDOW\r\n\r\n The first light of morning is starting to break through.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, stretching. He makes sure everything is set.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (calling out)\r\n Annie! Annie!\r\n\r\n With that, she enters.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Yes, Paul.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm almost done.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul, this is so romantic. Ian \r\n and Windthorne dueling for the right \r\n to Misery's hand. Does Ian win? Oh, \r\n don't me. It's Windthorne, right?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You'll know everything in a minute. \r\n Get the champagne.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n (dying from the \r\n suspense)\r\n Ahh!!!\r\n\r\n She exits; PAUL adjusts the manuscript on the table and then \r\n types the last line.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE IN THE KITCHEN. She takes the bottle of Dom Perignon \r\n out of the icebox, places it on a tray with two glasses--\r\n opens a drawer--takes out the gun--places it in her pocket--\r\n then takes out the hypodermic needle and places it on the \r\n tray.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL'S ROOM\r\n\r\n ANNIE enters with the tray. She sets it down on the table.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Did I do good?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n You did perfect. Except for one thing. \r\n This time we need two glasses.\r\n\r\n He takes the last page out of the typewriter.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Oh, Paul.\r\n\r\n As soon as she exits, PAUL drops the manuscript to the floor, \r\n pulls the lighter fluid from his pants, and starts dousing \r\n the manuscript with lighter fluid. He grabs the last chapter \r\n and twists the last few pages together torch style. He douses \r\n it with the fluid and holds the match out of sight.\r\n\r\n He smiles as we\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE entering with the second glass...\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n It's all right here, Annie. Remember \r\n how for all those years no one ever \r\n knew who Misery's real father was, \r\n or if they'd ever be reunited? It's \r\n all right here. Will Misery finally \r\n lead her countrymen to freedom? Does \r\n she finally marry Ian or will it be \r\n Windthorne? It's all right here.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MATCH, as he strikes it and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE screaming--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n Paul, you can't.\r\n\r\n And as her hands fly out beseechingly--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE CHAMPAGNE BOTTLE--it falls to the floor, explodes like a \r\n torpedo, shards of glass all over, curds of foam everywhere--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Why not? I learned it from you...\r\n\r\n And on that--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE LAST CHAPTER as Paul brings the match close to it and it \r\n bursts into flame. And Paul, holding it like the torch it \r\n is. Annie starts moving forward now.\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n No, no, NOT MISERY--NOT MY MISERY...!\r\n\r\n He drops the last chapter into the soaked manuscript and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE MANUSCRIPT, as KABOOM!, it bursts into flame and--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, transfixed by the sight for a moment,\r\n\r\n --and then she charges.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE FIRE as ANNIE rushes to the book, stoops down, grabs it \r\n with both hands, brings the burning mass up to her body, \r\n both arms across it, trying to smother the flames--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, grabbing the typewriter, raising it high above his \r\n head, then throwing it down on her with all his power and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TYPEWRITER, crashing into the back of her head.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, screaming, driven to the floor by the blow, the book \r\n beneath her, and the flames fly up, her sweater is starting \r\n to burn and she's covered with shards of glass from the \r\n shattered bottle of champagne and some of the manuscript is \r\n hissing from the liquid, but she is able to struggle to her \r\n knees--\r\n\r\n ANNIE\r\n I'm going to kill you, you lying \r\n cocksucker...\r\n\r\n As she struggles to her feet, she pulls out the gun and shoots \r\n at Paul, hitting him in the shoulder. Just as she's about to \r\n shoot again, Paul quickly wheels the chair up to her, throws \r\n himself out of the chair, and tackles her. The gun flies out \r\n of her hand and lands in the hallway, going off as it lands. \r\n They wrestle on the floor.\r\n\r\n Flames still around them, PAUL gets on top of her, grabs \r\n some burning pages, stuffs them into her mouth, shouting --\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Here. Here. You want it? You want \r\n it? You can eat it--eat it--eat it \r\n till you fucking CHOKE--you sick, \r\n twisted fuck.\r\n\r\n And as he forces more paper into her mouth--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, and she's hideous--blistered, her hands claw at her \r\n throat. She makes horrible sounds, spitting the charred chunks \r\n of manuscript out of her mouth. Shards of glass are in her \r\n hair. Now a shriek and a tremendous jerk of her body and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, falling away --\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, still making the sounds as she gets to her feet, and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, trying to crawl away after her.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE--heading for the door, she takes a step away from Paul, \r\n then another, then\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, suddenly kicking out with his shattered leg, screaming \r\n in pain as it crashes into her ankle and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, trying to keep her balance, not doing well, her arms \r\n windmilling as she fights for balance one last moment, fights \r\n and loses, and now, as she topples over--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE TYPEWRITER as she falls and her head slams into it, \r\n collides with the sharp metal and a great wound opens in her \r\n head. There is one final cry. Blood pours. It's over. All \r\n over. We are looking at a dead body.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, exhausted, panting, lying there, trying to gather his \r\n energy. He starts to crawl for the door. Just as he reaches \r\n the doorjamb, an arm grabs his leg, and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, shrieking, and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, pulling herself up his body and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, trying to buck her off, but he can't and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, the stronger, relentless, moving up on him, and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, his grip broken as he turns and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, all-powerful, looming over him and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, hitting up at her and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, swelling, and the blood pours down and if she feels \r\n his blows she doesn't show it and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, whatever energy he has left he uses now, trying to \r\n twist and strike and as his body moves--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n METAL BASED FLOOR LAMP and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, grabbing the thing, suddenly bringing it across his \r\n body, clobbering Annie in the face and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, startled by the power of the blow and for a moment \r\n she is stopped and\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, as with everything he has left, he crunches her forehead \r\n with the sharp heavy metal base, just creams her as the air \r\n is forced out of her--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE. Her eyes roll up into her head. For a moment all we \r\n see are the whites--\r\n\r\n --then she collapses on PAUL, a motionless mountain of slack \r\n flesh.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, scrambling free, pushing her off him, crawling for the \r\n door--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n --outside the door, as PAUL crawls into view, makes it to \r\n the corridor, reaches back, closes the door, locks it.\r\n\r\n Safe, he collapses, exhausted against the wall opposite the \r\n door.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. HOURS LATER. It is dawn. He is awakened by a loud \r\n smashing at the front door. After a couple of heart-stopping \r\n pounds,\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE FRONT DOOR smashes open, revealing two cops with guns \r\n drawn.\r\n\r\n THE POLICEMEN, hurrying to PAUL. The YOUNGER COP kneels beside \r\n Paul.\r\n\r\n YOUNGER COP\r\n It's the writer--the dead one--\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (trying to keep himself \r\n together)\r\n --right! I'm the dead one--\r\n\r\n OLDER COP\r\n Where's Sheriff McCain?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n He's in the cellar. She killed him.\r\n\r\n OLDER COP\r\n Annie Wilkes?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yeah. She's in there.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n The OLDER COP, taking the key to the room, unlocks the door, \r\n throws it open, and as he steps inside--\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INSIDE THE BEDROOM\r\n\r\n The OLDER COP has his gun ready to fire, but even with it \r\n tight in his hand, he's edgy as hell.\r\n\r\n He looks around--\r\n\r\n --glass and bloodstains on the floor. The charred remains of \r\n a manuscript.\r\n\r\n He kneels quickly, glances under the bed--nothing.\r\n\r\n He looks at the window--wide open.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL and the YOUNGER COP. Pause. The OLDER COP is in the \r\n doorway now.\r\n\r\n OLDER COP\r\n Mr. Sheldon? There's no one in there.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL: CLOSE UP. In shock.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n PALM COURT, PLAZA HOTEL\r\n\r\n This legend appears: ONE YEAR LATER\r\n\r\n MARCIA SINDELL is seated at a table. PAUL enters, walking \r\n briskly, and he's never looked this good before. He's gained \r\n his weight back, his color is normal again. He appears to \r\n be, for the first time in the movie, a jaunty, happy figure.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Sorry I'm late. Jenny's basketball \r\n game went into overtime. If anybody \r\n ever told me I'd have a daughter \r\n who'd get a triple double, I'd...\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Did they win?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Yeah. They're in the semis.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Here it is.\r\n (big moment)\r\n Very first copy.\r\n\r\n And she hands him a wrapped package. PAUL sits, begins \r\n unwrapping it. It's a book. A new one by Paul Sheldon. The \r\n Higher Education of J. Phillip Stone. Paul turns it over \r\n gently in his hands.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n The word I'm getting is the Times \r\n review is gonna be a love letter.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n That'd be a first.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n And my contacts at Time and Newsweek \r\n tell me they're both raves. And don't \r\n laugh--for the first time, I think \r\n you've got a shot at some prizes.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (flatly)\r\n Great.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I thought you'd be thrilled. You're \r\n being taken seriously.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I'm delighted the critics are liking \r\n it, and I hope the people like it, \r\n too. But it's not why I wrote the \r\n book.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL: CLOSE UP. There is a genuine sense of peace about him. \r\n He has been through the fire and survived.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I like it. Remember how you once \r\n said I live my whole life as if I'm \r\n in danger of being found out? Well, \r\n I believe I've managed to get that \r\n guy down on paper.\r\n (He touches the book. \r\n Beat.)\r\n Don't think I'm completely nuts, but \r\n in some way, Annie Wilkes, that whole \r\n experience, helped me.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Paul, since you brought her up, I \r\n have to ask you this, or I'd be \r\n drummed out of the agents' union--\r\n what about a non-fiction book? The \r\n truth about what went on in that \r\n house.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n Gee, Marcia, if I didn't know you \r\n better, I'd think you were suggesting \r\n I dredge up the worst horror of my \r\n life just so we could make a few \r\n bucks.\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n Now you've hurt me, Paul.\r\n\r\n As Paul glances around...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, looking past MARCIA.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n DESSERT TROLLEY, some distance away, being pushed by a \r\n waitress. It is ANNIE.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND SINDELL\r\n\r\n SINDELL\r\n I thought you were over it.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I am. Well, maybe not completely--\r\n\r\n He glances toward the trolley.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n THE DESSERT TROLLEY, moving inexorably closer to PAUL. ANNIE \r\n reaches down and pulls out a very sharp knife.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND SINDELL\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I don't know if you can ever be \r\n totally over something like that--I \r\n just don't think about it as much \r\n anymore, and when I do, it's not so \r\n terrifying.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n ANNIE, with the knife raised.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL, staring up at ANNIE.\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n I mean, once they found her body, my \r\n nightmares stopped.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL AND ANNIE--only it isn't Annie, just a WAITRESS. She \r\n stands by the trolley, the knife in her hand, ready to slice \r\n whatever anyone wants.\r\n\r\n WAITRESS\r\n Would you care for anything?\r\n\r\n PAUL\r\n (smiles)\r\n Cut me something sinful...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n PAUL. The smile holds. In the background now, soft music: \r\n someone might be playing \"Liberace.\"\r\n\r\n HOLD ON PAUL\r\n\r\n FINAL FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n THE END\r\n\r\n\t\r\n"
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https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/misery.html
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mission Impossible' ?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "\n\n\n\n\n\n MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE\n\n\n\n\n FINAL SHOOTING SCRIPT\n\n\n 16TH AUGUST 1995\n\n\n\n\n\n\n NOTE: THE HARD COPY OF THIS SCRIPT CONTAINED SCENE NUMBERS\n AND SOME \"SCENE OMITTED\" SLUGS. THEY HAVE BEEN REMOVED FOR\n THIS SOFT COPY.\n\n\n\n\n INT. KIEV APARTMENT - NIGHT\n\n We're in a large closet. JACK KIEFER, an athletic American\n in his late thirties wearing a headset, is wedged into a\n corner, staring at a television screen.\n\n The television shows a surveillance view of the living room\n that lies outside the confines of the closet. The TV image\n is in black and white. JACK shifts, trying like hell to get\n comfortable but he's been there a while\n\n ON THE SCREEN\n\n A bare bulb shines down on the contents of a shabby hotel\n room. Directly under the blub a man, GENNADY KASIMOV, sits\n in a straight backed wooden chair in his blood-stained T-\n shirt. There are a couple of THUGS and a stray HOOKER in the\n room behind him. A legend:\n\n KIEV\n\n KASIMOV is sobbing. Uncontrollably. A MAN enters the room,\n ANATOLY, an imperious Russian in his forties, a Russian\n godfather. The THUGS and HOOKERS are ushered out. ANATOLY\n looks down at KASIMOV pitiously and urges him to go and sit\n by him in a chair he picks up for him. KASIMOV does as he is\n bid, looking gratefully up at ANATOLY. They speak in Russian\n which is subtitled.\n\n ANATOLY\n Kasimov, Kasimov, good that you called\n us.\n\n KASIMOV\n (sobbing)\n I don't remember what happened! We were\n at the bar, drinking, laughing -- having\n fun.\n\n ANATOLY gets up out of the chair and goes to a bed across the\n room. A WOMAN lies half under the sheets. She's lying in an\n unnatural position on the bed, and the sheets are smeared\n with blood. She's dead. ANATOLY lifts her eyelid.\n\n KASIMOV\n I don't even know how I got here.\n I swear, Anatoly, I never touched her! I\n didn't lay a finger on her.\n\n ANATOLY moves away from the WOMAN.\n\n ANATOLY\n Kasimov. Don't flounder.\n\n IN THE CLOSET\n\n JACK, impatient, checks his watch. \n\n JACK \n Jesus, she's been under too long. Come \n on, come on! \n\n ON THE SCREEN \n\n KASIMOV \n You're the only one who can help me. \n\n Desperately he tugs at ANATOLY'S jacket. But ANATOLY hits \n his hand away and smacks him around the head. \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n JACK reacts. \n\n ON THE SCREEN\n\n ANATOLY bends close to KASIMOV. \n\n ANATOLY \n C'mon, c'mon, tell the truth...c'mon. \n\n KASIMOV \n They'll kill me. \n\n ANATOLY paces up the room, away from KASIMOV. \n\n ANATOLY \n You asked for my help. You asked for my\n help...come on... \n\n KASIMOV\n You're right, of course. \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n JACK leans forward. \n\n JACK \n The name pal...give us the name. \n\n ON THE SCREEN \n\n KASIMOV \n The contact in Minsk..the contact in \n Minsk..works in a travel agency. \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n JACK \n Come on! \n\n ON THE SCREEN \n\n ANATOLY \n Come on! \n\n KASIMOV \n His name is.....Dimitri Miediev. \n\n ANATOLY \n Dimitri Miediev...Dimitri Miediev... \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n JACK \n Got him. \n\n ON THE SCREEN \n\n Back on screen, ANATOLY places a hand on KASIMOV'S shoulder\n as if he had just anointed him. \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n In the closet, JACK types the name into a computer and cross \n checks -- \"MIEDIEV\" comes up, then \"posting/American \n consulate/Kiev.\" \n\n JACK turns and nods to a WHOREHOUSE WAITRESS in costume in \n the closet next to him, dressed in traditional Russian tunic \n and virtually no bottom. She quickly leaves. \n\n INT. SHABBY ROOM - NIGHT\n\n We enter the room for the first time as the WAITRESS does. \n She's carrying a tray with a bottle of vodka and two shot \n glasses. \n\n ANATOLY \n Now, we drink. \n\n He pours them out and hands one to KASIMOV. \n\n ANATOLY (CONT'D) \n To friends. \n\n KASIMOV \n Yes, Anatoly, yes. \n\n JACK \n Cheers. \n\n He drinks. He blinks. Something felt funny about that. \n Dizzied, KASIMOV swoons and passes out on the floor. ANATOLY \n moves to the closet door and opens it. \n\n IN THE CLOSET \n\n ANATOLY reaches up to his face --\n\n --and tears away a mask of flesh. He's no middle aged \n Russian mobster, he's ETHAN HUNT, an American in his early \n thirties. He gestures to KASIMOV contemptuously. JACK hands \n ETHAN a hypodermic kit and he goes quickly back into the \n room. \n\n ETHAN \n (in English now) \n Get rid of this scum. \n\n Immediately, there is activity, and PEOPLE everywhere. TWO \n OTHERS come into the room and carry KASIMOV out. \n\n ETHAN goes quickly to the body of the dead woman. He cheeks \n the pulse in her neck, shines a penlight in her eye. He \n strips the adrenalin kit and jabs the long needle into the \n dead woman's thigh. He checks her pulse again, checking a \n stopwatch. In about ten seconds, the woman's eyes open. \n\n CLAIRE is her name, a French woman of thirty or so. She half \n rolls over, GROANS, and wipes some of the blood from her \n mouth. \n\n CLAIRE \n Did we get it? \n\n ETHAN \n We got it. On your feet. \n\n CLAIRE \n I want to sleep. Can I sleep here. \n\n ETHAN \n Walk, just walk. Start walking. \n\n CLAIRE \n I'm walking. \n\n ETHAN \n Talking's good, walking's better. \n\n CLAIRE \n Sleeping's better. \n\n Meanwhile, MEN in overalls take apart the room. The ceiling \n lifts right off the walls, and the walls themselves start to \n come down, revealing the \"hotel room\" to be an elaborate set \n in the middle of an empty warehouse. \n\n JACK comes into the room from the closet. He hands CLAIRE \n her jewelry, including a watch and a wedding ring. ETHAN \n stops what he's doing, noticing. She looks up at him \n questioningly. \n\n CLAIRE \n Are you all right Ethan. What's wrong\n with you? \n\n ETHAN \n If you're gonna do this again Claire, \n It's not gonna be on my watch. \n\n CLAIRE \n Oh yeah? \n\n JACK comes into the room from the closet. He hands CLAIRE \n her jewelry, including a watch and a wedding ring. ETHAN \n stops what he's doing, noticing. She looks up at him, \n questioningly. \n\n JACK \n Claire. \n\n ETHAN \n Jack. \n\n She almost unconsciously slips the wedding ring onto her \n finger. ETHAN notices. He turns and SHOUTS to the room at \n large. \n\n ETHAN\n IS THERE ANY PARTICULAR REASON WE'RE NOT \n OUT OF HERE YET?! \n\n JACK \n Just waiting for you, tubs. \n\n He walks across the room and out the door. CLAIRE, worried, \n clutches her hands together, glancing down at her wedding \n ring. \n\n We move in on it --\n\n CUT TO: \n\n INT. JET - DAY\n\n -- and come out on another wedding ring, this one on a MAN's \n finger. One of several he's drumming on an arm rest in the \n plush first class cabin of a commercial airliner. He shoves \n some money into his wallet, and as he does so we catch a \n fleeting glimpse of a photograph of CLAIRE. \n\n The pilot's voice makes an announcement. \n\n VOICE (O.S.)\n Ladies and gentlemen, we have leveled off \n at our cruising altitude of thirty-eight \n thousand feet-and we should be arriving \n in Prague right on schedule. \n\n A FLIGHT ATTENDANT makes her way between the seats, passing \n out menus. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Would you like to watch a movie Mr Rosen? \n\n A passenger takes one. The ATTENDANT continues on. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n (CONT'D) \n Would you like to watch a movie Mr \n Phelps? \n\n The MAN with the wedding ring looks up. JIM PHELPS is in his \n mid-forties, good-looking, intense. He's a tired man, and \n not just now, it's a profound fatigue. He looks up at the \n ATTENDANT and smiles warmly. \n\n PHELPS \n No, I prefer the theatre. \n\n A look crosses the FLIGHT ATTENDANT'S face; her tone becomes \n stilted. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Would you consider the cinema of the\n Ukraine? \n\n PHELPS \n Perhaps you'd choose one for me. \n\n The ATTENDANT turns and walks away. PHELPS sits back, shakes \n a cigarette out of a pack, and taps it nervously on the \n armrest. \n\n AT THE FRONT OF THE CABIN.\n\n The FLIGHT ATTENDANT opens a case loaded with video 8 \n cassettes of feature films. She opens a panel in the top of \n the case and withdraws a tape hidden back there. \n\n BACK AT PHELPS' SEAT\n\n The ATTENDANT returns with the tape and hands it to PHELPS. \n He takes it without a word and she moves on. \n\n PHELPS reaches down and turns a lever on the support between \n his seat and the empty one beside him. He flips up a small \n movie screen and angles it toward himself, away from the \n other passengers. He puts on a headset, opens a door in the \n armrest, and puts the tape in. \n\n He presses play.\n\n ON THE TAPE, \n\n the image of a man comes on. EUGENE KITTRIDGE is fortyish, \n but seems permanently stuck in the Nixon era -- horn rimmed \n glasses, short short haircut, rather be caught dead than \n tieless. But if he catches your eye, he will never, ever \n look away. He's seated at a desk, looking into the camera. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n (on the tape) \n Good morning, Mr. Phelps. The man you're \n about to see is Aleksander Golitsyn -- \n\n The screen winks and shows an image of GOLITSYN, a burly man \n in his forties. The image is herky-jerky videotape, \n presumably taken from a concealed camera as GOLITSYN walks \n down a foreign street. \n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.) \n -- a former KGB Line X officer now \n working the international black market \n selling intelligence. This morning, we \n learned that Golitsyn has stolen one half \n of a CIA NOC list, the list of our non- \n official cover agents working in Eastern \n Europe. \n\n The screen shows an image of what such a list might look \n like, code names and other information scrolling by on a \n computer screen at high speed. \n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.) \n For security reasons, the NOC list is \n divided into two encoded halves. \n Golitsyn already has the cryptonym \n portion, which contains agent code names \n and targeting areas. This portion is \n useless unless combined with the second \n half -- the true name list that is kept \n in the CIA station in our Embassy in Prague. \n\n The Embassy itself comes on screen, a beautiful old building \n at the base of the Charles Bridge, which spans the Vltava \n River. \n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.) \n We believe Golitsyn plans to steal the \n true name list at an Embassy function \n tomorrow night. Your mission, should you \n decide to accept it, is to obtain \n photographic proof of the theft, apprehend \n those involved, and return the stolen \n list. I don't have to stress the \n importance of this matter, Jim. We're \n keeping it internally black. Because of \n its urgency, I've already sent to Prague \n a team selected from your usual group. \n\n Still photographs come on screen, some of which we're already \n seen -- JACK KIEFER, CLAIRE and ETHAN. \n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.) \n Ethan Hunt will of course be your point \n man, as usual. He's in Kiev; we're \n getting word to him now. \n\n INT. JET - DAY\n\n PHELPS sits back in his seat, closes his eyes, and rubs his \n tired brow. KITTRIDGE himself comes back on the tape. \n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.) \n As always, should you or any member of \n your IM force be caught or killed, the \n Secretary will disavow all knowledge of \n your actions. This tape will self- \n destruct in five seconds. Good luck, \n Jim! \n\n PHELPS inhales deeply -- \n\n -- the tape in the armrest starts to smolder, sending up a \n plume of wispy smoke -- \n\n -- and PHELPS exhales, concealing the plume in a cloud of \n cigarette smoke. \n\n CUT TO: \n\n EXT. PRAGUE SAFE HOUSE - DAY\n\n SARAH and HANNA, a German woman in her mid-thirties enter. \n Another legend: \n\n PRAGUE \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - PRAGUE - DAY \n\n The IMF team's safe house is a sparsely furnished Prague \n apartment with a panoramic view of the city. \n\n The IMF team is scattered around the room. Sketches, pads, \n overfilled ashtrays and equipment are strewn everywhere. \n JACK and SARAH seated next to each other - JACK demonstrating \n the VISCO glasses to her. CLAIRE is seated opposite JACK at \n the computer. JIM and ETHAN are in the kitchen. HANNAH \n taking a roll of black-out curtain through the room. \n\n JACK \n Look to your right, then back to me. \n There's a camera built right into the \n bridge. Whatever you see it sees and \n transmits it back here. Can you hear me?\n\n SARAH \n Of course I can hear you. \n\n JACK \n No, in your...ear piece. You have a \n lovely smile (eyes). Can you hear me \n now? \n\n SARAH \n Loud and clear. \n\n JACK \n What's going on? \n\n SARAH \n I don't know. \n\n JACK \n Why don't you take a look? \n\n SARAH \n Jack...that's spying. \n\n JACK \n That's what we do isn't it? \n\n SARAH \n Jack you're so wicked. \n\n JACK \n Too wicked to have a drink later? \n\n SARAH \n I think I might just take that look. \n\n ETHAN and JIM PHELPS are in a heated conversation. \n\n ETHAN \n Yeah, well, Jim, fact is I've got more \n than ninety days leave coming. \n\n PHELPS \n A hundred and sixty-seven, I think it is. \n Take it all, if you want. After this one. \n\n ETHAN \n I thought I'd take some now. \n\n PHELPS\n (quietly, to Ethan) \n What the hell's made you decide to take \n your leave at the worst possible time? \n Claire's in a weird mood too. \n\n ETHAN \n Oh? What's the problem? \n\n PHELPS \n I don't know, I had to go to Chicago \n again. You were in Kiev. You tell me. \n\n ETHAN \n Tell you what? \n\n PHELPS \n When you started noticing your short term \n memory loss. What the problem was you \n and Claire had in Kiev? \n\n ETHAN \n What problem? \n\n PHELPS\n (laughs)\n Ah, God, forget it. What are we talking\n burnout here?\n\n ETHAN \n I guess. \n\n PHELPS \n Ethan, you can't burn out. \n\n ETHAN\n Why not? \n\n PHELPS \n Because I can't afford it. And because \n you'd burn up before you'd burn out. \n\n CLAIRE, who is at the computer behind them, somehow seems to \n be the reference point in the following exchange: \n\n ETHAN \n How was Chicago? \n\n PHELPS \n Wonderful. Ran into a convention of auto \n dealers at the Drake Hotel. You hear the \n one about the astronaut who comes back \n from the first manned flight to Mars \n after two years? His wife's got a year \n old kid. So he says \"All right. Who was \n it? My friend Harry?\" She says no. \"Oh,\n it was my friend Sammy.\" She says it \n wasn't Sammy. \"Oh, I suppose it was my \n friend Lou.\" \"No, what's the matter, \n don't you think I have any friends of my \n own?!\" \n\n PHELPS laughs. ETHAN doesn't. The back of CLAIRE'S head is \n in his line of sight. \n\n PHELPS (CONT'D) \n Boy, you really are grim. Come here, \n take a look. \n\n He leads ETHAN to the window, which overlooks the city. \n\n EXT. PRAGUE - DAY \n\n ETHAN's POV of Embassy. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - DAY\n\n ETHAN nods. \n\n PHELPS (CONT'D) \n Beyond Charles Bridge there is our \n Embassy. See it? Tomorrow night, if \n anything goes wrong, this guy will steal \n the names of our agents in every country \n all over Eastern Europe. Up for grabs to \n the highest bidders -- third world \n terrorists, arms dealers, drug lords -- \n any and everybody who'd love to get rid \n of long term coverts like us, and some \n very dear friends among them. If they're \n exposed, they'll be executed. Come over \n here. Take a lock at this. \n\n CLAIRE, who is working at a computer, has pulled up a \n quicktime video image in a box on her screen. In it, an old \n edition of the McLaughlin Report, the PBS news show, is \n playing. \n\n ETHAN is distracted by it. \n\n INSERT - TELEVISION\n\n SENATOR WALTZER, a bearded, bespectacled man in his forties, \n is holding forth: \n\n SENATOR WALTZER \n I'll go you one further. I say the CIA \n and all its shadow organizations have \n become irrelevant at best and \n unconstitutional at worst. It's time we \n throw a little light on the whole concept \n of the Pentagon's \"black budget.\" These \n covert agency subgroups have confidential \n funding, they report to no one -- who are\n these people?! We were living in a \n democracy the last time I checked. \n\n BACK TO SCENE \n\n ETHAN looks back at JIM. \n\n ETHAN \n You're going to use Walter? \n\n PHELPS \n He's our guy. \n\n ETHAN \n Isn't he chairing the Armed Services hearing? \n\n PHELPS \n Not this week. This week he's flyfishing \n at the Oughterard Slough in County \n Kildare, with one of our best Irish guides. \n\n ETHAN\n He won't be back in a hurry? \n\n PHELPS \n No, not in a hurry. What do you think? \n You think the plot'll work? \n\n ETHAN \n Sure. If the main character does. \n\n PHELPS \n If you were me, Ethan, who would you\n trust to make him believable? \n\n JACK comes breezing in with a piece of bubble gum.\n\n JACK \n Sorry, am I interrupting? \n\n ETHAN\n Always. \n\n JACK shows the gum to ETHAN.\n\n JACK \n Stick of gum. If you come up against a \n lock you can't pick -- \n\n Half the gum is red, the other half is green. \n\n JACK (CONT'D) \n Red light. Green light. Mash them \n together, asta lasagna. Don't get any on \n you -- you have five seconds. \n\n He offers the gum to ETHAN.\n\n PHELPS \n Are you gonna take it? \n\n CLAIRE glances up from the computer and catches ETHAN's eye. \n PHELPS may have caught the glance, but is focused on ETHAN. \n\n ETHAN \n (relenting) \n Give me the God damn gum. \n\n JACK \n Just don't chew it. \n\n PHELPS \n Thank you. \n\n CUT TO: \n\n EXT. AMERICAN EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n The American Embassy glitters beside the Vltava River. Party \n at the Embassy tonight. \n\n INT. AN ELEVATOR SHAFT - NIGHT\n\n JACK, wearing black coveralls and slightly odd-looking \n eyeglasses (they're called Visco glasses), enters an elevator \n shaft through a small door at the base of the wall. He looks \n up the shaft, shining a flashlight until he finds what he's \n looking for -- \n\n -- a gray metal box, protruding from the wall one floor up. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS is at a table in the safe house apartment, watching \n the bank of monitors HANNAH wired together earlier. The \n monitors are alive now, showing various views of the inside \n of the Embassy, where the party is going on, and one view of \n the elevator shaft. \n\n PHELPS wearing an IMF headset and speaks into the mouthpiece. \n\n PHELPS \n Ethan. Jack's inside. Window's open by \n twenty-three hundred. \n\n INT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n Inside the Embassy, the party is a formal, tuxedoed affair \n that's in full swing on the second floor. \n\n SENATOR WALTZER, the man who was on TV, walks up a grand \n staircase, headed in. An AMERICAN DIPLOMAT in a tuxedo \n hurries up to him. \n\n DIPLOMAT \n How do you do, Senator, I'm Rand Housman, \n the Ambassador's aide. If I could just \n steer you through the reception line here\n --\n\n The DIPLOMAT pilots the SENATOR by one arm, guiding him to a \n reception line at the base of the stairs to the party. \n\n DIPLOMAT (CONT'D) \n Allow me to introduce Jaroslav Reid, the \n director of the National Gallery -- Petr \n Brandl, the mayor of Prague -- \n\n SARAH, a very attractive young American dressed in an elegant \n gown, steps out of the reception line and shakes hands with \n WALTZER. \n\n SARAH \n I bet you don't remember me, do you, Senator? \n\n SENATOR WALTZER \n Of course I do. How are you, Miss \n Norman? \n\n He leans in and kisses her on the cheek, and as he does so \n SARAH whispers something in his ear. \n\n SARAH \n He's in pocket. Under the archway behind me. \n\n Her tone, her words -- we realize she's on the team. \n\n The SENATOR pulls a pair of Visco glasses from his pocket \n (and if we didn't know the SENATOR was ETHAN before, this \n confirms it), puts them on, and looks up, over her shoulder. \n\n UNDER AN ARCHWAY NEAR THE ENTRANCE, \n\n ALEKSANDER GOLITSYN, the Ukrainian, has just come in from \n outside. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS sees the SENATOR's point of view of GOLITSYN, through \n the glasses, broadcast back to PHELPS' monitor. He speaks \n into his microphone. \n\n PHELPS \n Sarah, mark the package and go to two. \n\n INT. EMBASSY PARTY - NIGHT\n\n SARAH still has the SENATOR's attention. \n\n SARAH \n Your advance team mentioned you'd want a \n tour of the facility, so I've gone ahead \n and set that up for you -- \n\n SENATOR WALTZER \n Terrific. Let's get going. \n (to the Diplomat) \n Will you excuse us? \n\n He slips an arm around SARAH and they walk off, not into the \n party, but the other way, toward a staircase that leads \n further into the Embassy. \n\n DIPLOMAT \n Uh, sir? \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT - NIGHT \n\n JACK climbs up the elevator shaft, towards the gray metal \n box. He just begins to remove the cover when he hears a \n noise from above. He looks up and sees the elevator above \n him descending. \n\n JACK quickly pulls himself flush against the wall. The \n elevator comes down adjacent to him and stops, pinning him \n to the wall. \n\n JACK \n Great. Come on. \n\n INT. EMBASSY PARTY - NIGHT \n\n As the SENATOR and SARAH pass behind the entering GOLITSYN, \n SARAH pulls a small bottle of perfume from her purse. But as \n she sprays, she points it slightly to the left, missing \n herself and hitting the back of GOLITSYN'S head. He never \n notices. They move on and down the flight of stairs. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT \n\n JIM PHELPS monitors the Visco views of the party. He looks \n to the fourth monitor and checks a view of the party, a jumpy \n one, as someone hurrying up stairs. \n\n PHELPS \n Hannah. He's marked. Lets go. \n\n INT. EMBASSY PARTY - NIGHT\n\n On a flight of stairs, HANNAH, dressed for the party and \n slightly out of breath, hurries up the stairs. \n\n HANNAH \n En route. \n\n She also has a pair of Visco glasses, which she trains on the \n party below. She pushes a micro switch on the side of her \n glasses, activating an electronic filter, which tints the \n lenses. \n\n PHELPS (O/S) \n Hannah, pull the shade (or - Hannah go to\n night vision). \n\n HANNAHíS VISCO POV \n\n the party looks the same, but one head in the crowd stands \n out. That head is GOLITSYN'S, his hair a fluorescent green \n where SARAH sprayed it. \n\n INT. THE DENIED AREA/ELEVATOR BANK - NIGHT\n\n The SENATOR (let's just call him ETHAN) and SARAH come down \n the stairs and pass a sign that says \"Denied Area -- \n Political Attaches Only.\" ETHAN checks his watch. 23:00. \n\n He nods to SARAH, they round a corner, and come to an \n elevator at the end of the corridor. A sign in front of it \n says \"Out of Order.\" They head for it anyway. \n\n A MARINE GUARD appears from behind a side door, catching them \n by surprise. \n\n JACK \n Governor's in position. We have the elevator. \n\n GUARD \n Excuse me, can I help you? \n\n SARAH \n -- which leads directly to the Denied \n Area, the only limited access area in the \n whole facility. \n\n SARAH flashes an ID at the GUARD and keeps talking. \n\n SARAH (CONT'D) \n As you can see. this area has both a \n Marine guard and video surveillance, and \n is strictly monitored at all times. \n\n She walks up to the thumbprint analyzer on the elevator bank \n and slides her thumb inside. The panel lights up and flashes \n a message -- \"ACCESS DENIED.\" SARAH and ETHAN trade a look. \n\n SARAH (CONT'D)\n (covering) \n Senator, don't you have a young man on \n your staff named JACK? \n\n She tries the thumb again, Still no soap. \n\n ETHAN \n Jack? I believe we did have a young man \n named Jack. Not a reliable man, as I \n recall. Constantly late or behind in his \n work. \n\n Now the GUARD, noticing that Sarah's not being allowed \n access, comes closer to them. \n\n GUARD \n Excuse me, let me see that ID again! \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT - NIGHT\n\n JACK is still pinned to the wall by the elevator, listening \n to their conversation. \n\n PHELPS (O.S.) \n Jack's pinned down Sarah. Should be a \n second. Keep dancing. \n\n ETHAN (O.S.) \n (with the Senator's southern accent) \n We were forced to tie him to my best \n stallion and drag him around the barn a \n few times. \n\n Finally, the elevator moves down a floor and JACK is freed. \n\n JACK \n Relax your crack, Foghorn, I'm workin' on\n it. \n\n He quickly opens the gray metal box, revealing a maze of \n circuitry. He patches in his computer, climbs on top of the \n elevator, and hits the keyboard, beginning to download.\n\n THE LAPTOP\n\n there's a split-screen of SARAH's thumbprint and the ID \n picture. JACK downloads her file into the security computer. \n\n INT. THE DENIED AREA/ELEVATOR BANK - NIGHT\n\n Ignoring the GUARD, SARAH turns and slides her thumb into the \n thumbprint analyzer once more. The panel glows, this time \n the message flashes -- \n\n IDENTITY CONFIRMED \n\n -- and the elevator doors slide open briskly. \n\n The GUARD, surprised, now catches sight of the SENATOR. \n\n GUARD \n Oh. Sorry, sir. \n\n He snaps a salute. ETHAN and SARAH get into the elevator and \n the doors close behind them. \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT - NIGHT\n\n JACK looks down at the elevator below. Through a grating, he \n can see them inside. \n\n JACK \n The drink (date) with Sarah is definitely\n off. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS moves from JACK's view of the elevator car to HANNAH's \n view of the party on his video monitors. \n\n PHELPS \n (a touch of impatience) \n Hannah -- I'm blind again. Hannah. \n\n INT. EMBASSY PARTY - NIGHT\n\n HANNAH, stationed on the second floor of the Embassy, moves \n to get a better view of the party. She reacquires GOLITSYN's \n glowing head. \n\n HANNAH \n He's heading to the denied area. \n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n This work room is filled with combination lock filing \n cabinets and various computer terminals. ETHAN hands SARAH \n his Visco glasses and she crosses the room, placing them \n upside down on top of a filing cabinet. \n\n ETHAN straps on a Visco wrist monitor and tunes it in, \n switching several times. \n\n ETHAN \n (to Sarah) \n Higher. Higher. \n\n SARAH \n Higher. \n\n ETHAN \n Right, right. Good. \n\n SARAH adjusts the glasses. \n\n THROUGH THE GLASSES, \n\n the view of the main computer terminal is upside down, but \n clear. Anyone sitting there will be recorded. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n On PHELPS' monitor, we see ETHAN, via his Visco glasses on \n the filing cabinet, standing next to the computer. PHELPS \n barks out a warning. \n\n PHELPS \n Get moving, Ethan. He's rolling to you. \n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN pushes the elevator button but the elevator is already \n moving up. \n\n ETHAN \n Jack we're in position. \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT/WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n In a split view, we see both sides of the elevator wall \n simultaneously -- on one side, JACK is lying on top of the \n rising elevator, on the other side, ETHAN and SARAH are \n waiting for it to arrive. \n\n ETHAN \n Jack. Jack. \n\n JACK \n I didn't touch it. \n\n The elevator stops, the doors open -- \n\n -- and GOLITSYN gets on. GOLITSYN descends in the elevator \n with JACK on top and ETHAN and SARAH waiting down below! \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS sees JACK's point of view of the elevator, with \n GOLITSYN inside. \n\n PHELPS \n (tension rising) \n He's in the box, Ethan, he's in the box! \n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN and SARAH are waiting in front of the elevator, the one \n GOLITSYN is about to step off of! ETHAN looks around, for a \n place to hide. \n\n ETHAN \n OK. Taking Golitsyn's exit. Jack, open\n the doors. \n\n SARAH \n What about my coat? I'll freeze. \n\n JACK (O.S.) \n I don't have it. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT \n\n PHELPS whips over to a laptop and starts typing. \n\n PHELPS \n Opening the doors. Go under. \n\n He jabs ENTER on his keyboard. \n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n The elevator doors WHISK open, revealing the empty shaft \n beyond. ETHAN and SARAH jump into the shaft. \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN and SARAH jump down into the five foot empty space \n below the work room floor. Above them, the elevator \n continues its descent, with them hiding below. The elevator \n drops to just over their heads and stops. \n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n GOLITSYN steps off the elevator, crosses the room and slides \n a 3.5 computer disk into the computer in the work room. \n Through the Visco glasses, we can clearly see him at work, \n downloading the vital information. \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (BELOW ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n Waiting below the elevator, ETHAN takes off his jacket, \n starting to reverse it. He checks his Visco wrist monitor as \n GOLITSYN perpetrates the theft. He smiles and speaks into a \n microphone. \n\n ETHAN \n He's got it. Saved your ass again Jack. \n\n JACK (O.S.) \n Give me a break, Pops. \n\n SARAH \n Such a nice ass. \n\n JACK (O.S.) \n And a lonely ass. \n\n ETHAN \n Sarah's reconsidering. Claire, transport \n in five minutes. \n\n CLAIRE (O.S.) \n Roger that. \n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (BELOW ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n Back inside, ETHAN strips off his mask and wearing his now \n reversed jacket, he and SARAH exit the small door at the base \n of the elevator shaft. \n\n EXT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n JACK rapidly disconnects his equipment. But as he pulls the \n final electrical clip from the elevator's wiring, it flashes \n and SPARKS. \n\n EXT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN and SARAH exit an Embassy service area by the \n waterfront and blend into the Embassy crowd, as an amorous \n couple. \n\n ETHAN\n In position. Jack open the door, let the\n package roll.\n\n JACK (O.S.)\n Roger that. Opening doors now.\n\n ETHAN\n Stairway, youíre wrapped, go to\n transport.\n\n ETHANíS voice comes over HANNAHíS earpiece.\n\n HANNAH\n En route.\n\n HANNAH breaks off and goes up the stairs.\n\n INT. ELEVATOR - NIGHT\n\n The button marked \"ROOF\" lights up, seemingly all by itself.\n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n The car engages with a sharp jolt --\n\n JACK\n Hey.\n\n --and starts to rise. JACK looks down, into the elevator\n car, through the grate. Thereís no one in it.\n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n On one of his monitors, PHELPS sees the elevator moving in\n the shaft.\n\n PHELPS\n Jack, what are you doing?!\n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n JACK\n Iím not doing anything! (I donít have it\n either).\n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS is typing at his keyboard and jamming the enter button\n but gets no response.\n\n PHELPS\n I donít have it -- I donít have\n control!\n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n JACKíS face pales. He looks up, above him, at the\n approaching ceiling.\n\n JACK\n Uh -- then I have a problem.\n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n GOLITSYN pulls out the now-programmed disk from the computer,\n slips it in his jacket pocket and heads for the door.\n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n JACK looks up through his Visco glasses at the approaching\n roof, covered with spikes.\n\n EXT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n Through the monitor, ETHAN sees JACKíS P.O.V. of the roof of\n the building approaching. Fast.\n\n ETHAN\n Cut the power. Cut the power Jack. Do\n you hear me.\n\n INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (ABOVE ELEVATOR) - NIGHT\n\n On top of the elevator, JACK has ripped open the control\n panel again and is frantically trying to adjust wires to get\n the thing to stop.\n\n He swears, his fingers fumble, he works faster and faster.\n He looks up. The roof of the building is nearly upon him.\n \n ETHAN (O.S.)\n Come on, Jack, come on.\n\n JACK looks up again, he cringes, he covers his head with his\n hands, he SCREAMS --\n\n --and heís crushed to death against the roof.\n\n EXT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN is staring at the static on the monitor that once was\n JACKíS signal.\n\n ETHAN\n Jack. Jack.\n\n He closes his eyes, knowing what that means.\n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS also sees the static.\n\n PHELPS\n Man down. Stay where you are. Iím on my\n way.\n\n He gets up and races out of the apartment.\n\n INT. EMBASSY WORK ROOM - NIGHT\n\n GOLITSYN, who now has the disk, jabs again and again at the\n elevator button but it wonít even light up. He studies the\n elevator doors and jumps into the shaft, just as ETHAN and\n SARAH did moments before.\n\n He hits the floor of the elevator shaft and exits the small\n door at the shaftís base.\n\n EXT. PRAGUE SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS hurries towards the bridge.\n\n PHELPS\n En route.\n\n EXT. CHARLES BRIDGE - NIGHT\n\n PHELPS dashes onto the Charles Bridge and heads across the\n river, toward the Embassy. He throws a look back, over his\n shoulder. Paranoiaís setting in.\n\n EXT. EMBASSY (AS SEEN FROM CHARLES BRIDGE) - NIGHT\n\n Outside the Embassy, GOLITSYN escapes, pushing through the\n service area door and racing past a DRUNKEN COUPLE who are in\n the midst of a loverís quarrel, in Russian.\n\n Pan past the embankment and onto the bridge where PHELPS is\n still racing to meet ETHAN. But he stops suddenly, as if\n hearing something and looks behind him, at the deepening\n gloom.\n\n EXT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN and SARAH hear PHELPíS voice over the monitor.\n\n SARAH\n The package is in the open.\n\n ETHAN\n Jim. Jim. Heís in the open.\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n Iíve got a shadow.\n\n ETHAN\n Can you lose him?\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n No. Abort.\n\n Over ETHANís shoulder, SARAH sees GOLITSYN getting away. Fog\n starts to roll over the river towards the bridge.\n\n SARAH\n Ethan. Heís out of pocket. \n\n ETHAN\n (to Phelps) \n Jim we canít.\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n Abort. Thatís an order.\n\n ETHAN\n Negative, Golitsynís on the move.\n\n INT. GETAWAY CAR - NIGHT\n\n Seated in the getaway car, CLAIRE listens to JIM and ETHAN\n argue.\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n No, damn it, no, I said ABORT!\n\n EXT. EMBASSY - NIGHT\n\n Outside the Embassy, SARAH and ETHAN argue.\n\n ETHAN\n Sarah eye on the package. Jim, Iím\n coming to you.\n\n SARAH\n Jim gave an abort, we should walk\n away.\n\n ETHAN\n No, weíre going to recover the disk,\n understand?! Now move!\n\n ETHAN takes off for the bridge, leaving SARAH to shadow\n GOLITSYN.\n\n EXT. PARKING AREA - NIGHT\n\n HANNAH hurries toward the getaway vehicle.\n\n EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN moves to the bridge stairs.\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n Where are you?\n\n ETHAN\n About two hundred yards from the bridge.\n\n PHELPS (O.S.)\n Theyíre covering this frequency, Ethan.\n Cut all radio communications. Repeat.\n Cut all radio communications. \n\n ETHAN continues to run toward the stairs to the bridge. Past\n CLAIRE who sits in the getaway car. He looks on his monitor\n and again sees PHELPSí POV. Only ominous silence. Phelps is\n looking back over his shoulder. The bridge is deserted.\n\n EXT. EMBANKMENT - NIGHT\n\n SARAH follows GOLITSYN as he hurries toward the shore, where\n a cobblestone promenade runs along the river. He disappears\n into the fog at the edge of the river.\n\n EXT. STAIRS TO BRIDGE - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN checks his monitor again.\n\n THE MONITOR\n\n PHELPSí point of view changes radically as his head swivels\n on the darkened bridge. He whirls again, looking over his\n shoulder and this time the barrel of a gun is visible,\n pointing at him and before PHELPS has a chance to react a\n GUNSHOT CRACKLES over the monitor.\n\n The point of view goes crazy for a moment, then over and down\n to a bloody hole in his own chest.\n\n His head rocks again, then goes over the side of the bridge\n and makes the long, hard fall into the river below.\n \n EXT. STAIRS TO BRIDGE - NIGHT\n\n ETHANís face goes white with shock.\n\n ETHAN\n JIM!\n\n EXT. CHARLES BRIDGE - NIGHT\n\n He races up the rest of the stairs to the bridge but thereís\n no sign of PHELPS.\n\n ETHAN runs to the railing and looks down into the river but\n sees only dark, choppy waters below, now becoming\n obscured in the gathering fog.\n\n He turns and looks to the embankment. He can faintly see\n GOLITSYN, hurrying along the promenade. ETHAN gives chase.\n\n EXT. PARKING AREA - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN runs towards the getaway car, reaching a vantage point\n on the top of the stairs, he can see CLAIREíS outline,\n visible in the driverís seat. But as he descends the stairs\n --\n\n --the car explodes and bursts into flames.\n\n The force of the blast knocks ETHAN back.\n\n ETHAN\n CLAIRE!\n\n He watches the burning car in stunned silence for a moment, a \n stunned CROWD starts to gather.\n\n Remembering SARAH, he rushes down the stairs towards the\n embankment.\n\n EXT. EMBANKMENT - NIGHT\n\n SARAH comes out of the fog near the riverbank and sees\n GOLITSYN again, slowing down. A MAN comes out of the fog an\n seems to ask GOLITSYN for a light.\n\n SARAH draws closer. Behind her, the DRUNKEN COUPLE seems to\n be hanging with her for some reason.\n\n EXT. STAIRS FROM BRIDGE - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN continues towards the embankment.\n\n EXT. EMBANKMENT - NIGHT\n\n SARAH is almost to GOLITSYN. Suddenly, the MAN in front of\n GOLITSYN pulls him towards him. Sensing something wrong,\n SARAH quickens her pace. The MAN is now hunched over\n GOLITSYN, facing away from SARAH, going through GOLITSYNís\n pockets.\n\n The figure finds what itís looking for -- the disk -- and\n takes it. SARAH comes closer --\n\n -- and the figure whirls. It brings a knife up sharply,\n plunges it into her chest and slinks away out of sight.\n\n ANGLE\n\n ETHAN races around the corner onto the embankment. He bursts\n out of the fog, just in time to see SARAH fall to her knees,\n over GOLITSYNís body. ETHAN sees the knife in her chest and\n GASPS.\n\n He pulls the knife out of SARAH, who is close to death. He\n looks at it -- it is a black Teflon knife with a serrated\n edge.\n\n BEHIND ETHAN\n\n The DRUNKEN COUPLE seem drunk no more. In fact, theyíre\n watching ETHAN. Through the fog and night, they see him\n leaning over SARAH, holding the knife in his hands.\n\n AT THE BODIES\n\n SARAH goes still. ETHAN lays her down, turns the other body\n over and sees that it is GOLITSYN. He quickly begins\n rummaging through his pockets.\n\n ETHAN hear police sirens and sees...\n\n ANGLE\n\n A Prague police boat, SIREN wailing, arrives at the dock in\n front of the Embassy. The DRUNKEN MAN and WOMAN stop\n suddenly.\n\n As THREE POLICE leap off the boat and race toward the\n explosion, ETHAN leaps over the gate and races up the alley\n and out of sight.\n\n EXT. STREET -- PHONE BOOTH - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN unscrews the mouthpiece of a payphone receiver. Heís\n holding a flat piece of metal with six prongs on it, a \n modernist cockroach. He CLICKS the cockroach into the guts\n of the phoneís wiring, piercing it with its little prongs.\n\n He screws the mouthpiece back on, holds the phoneís tongue\n down for a second, releases it and listens. He has a dial\n tone. Now he punches in a fourteen digit number he knows by\n heart.\n\n After a moment, a FLAT VOICE comes on the other side.\n\n FLAT VOICE (O.S.)\n Satcom seven.\n\n ETHAN\n Central Europe. Unsecured.\n\n FLAT VOICE (O.S.)\n Designator?\n\n ETHAN\n Bravo Echo one one.\n\n FLAT VOICE (O.S.)\n Switching.\n\n There is a long pause and then familiar voice comes on the\n line.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n This is Kittridge.\n\n ETHAN\n Go secure.\n\n Pause. A funny series of CLICKS comes over the line. \n \n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Go ahead.\n\n ETHAN\n Theyíre dead.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Whoís dead?\n\n ETHAN\n My team. Claire, Jack, even Jim -\n - Hannah, maybe, I -- donít know\n \n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Are you damaged?\n\n ETHAN\n They knew we were coming. Golitsynís\n dead too. The disk is gone.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Are you intact?\n\n ETHAN\n Do you read me? The list is in the open!\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Let's just bring you in safely, and then\n we'll worry about that, okay? Were you\n followed?\n\n ETHAN closes his eyes. KITTRIDGEíS voice is strong and\n reassuring and he needs that right now.\n\n ETHAN\n I donít think so.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Donít think, be sure. Are you clean?\n\n ETHAN\n Yes.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Location green. One hour. Iíll be there\n myself.\n\n ETHAN\n Youíre in Prague?\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n Heard a lot about you, Hunt. Donít\n disappoint me.\n\n ETHAN\n No sir.\n\n KITTRIDGE (O.S.)\n One hour.\n\n He hangs up. ETHAN does the same. He stares at the phone\n for a moment, thinking. He checks his watch.\n\n EXT. STREET - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN steps out of the phone booth and starts down the\n street. Every face seems to be starring at him now, every\n sound is menacing. He pulls his coat in tight, shoves his\n hands in his pockets and walks among the crowd.\n\n EXT. OLD TOWN SQUARE - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN makes his way past the old town clock, a towering,\n gothic structure and into a plaza, surrounded mostly by \n residential buildings.\n\n ETHANíS POV\n\n Straight across from him is a glass enclosed restaurant built\n on the portico of an old palace.\n\n Brilliantly lit up from inside, the restaurant positively\n shimmers, every table visible from everywhere in the plaza.\n\n INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN'S POV \n\n ETHAN walks in the glass front doors, right next to an \n enormous fish tank, part of the restaurant's exterior wall. \n He scans the clientele carefully -- maybe a dozen PATRONS are \n scattered around. \n\n EUGENE KITTRIDGE is seated at a table in the middle. He and \n ETHAN make eye contact. ETHAN walks to the table, a couple \n of quick, seemingly cursory glances around the room as he \n goes. KITTRIDGE has been working on a pretty good-sized \n lobster. He rises to greet ETHAN and they sit. \n \n KITTRIDGE \n I can't tell you how sorry I am. I know \n how much Jim in particular meant to you, \n Ethan. Personally as well as professionally. \n\n ETHAN \n Yeah. \n\n He spots a stack of documents on the table.\n\n ETHAN picks them up. There's a Canadian picture bearing \n ETHAN photo and the name Phillipe Doucette, credit cards, \n driver's license, etc. \n\n KITTRIDGE\n Passport, visas - you know the drill. \n We'll work the exfiltration thru Canada, \n debrief you at Langley. Throw the Prague \n police a bone, you know toss them a few \n suspects. Follow me? \n\n ETHAN \n Yeah. I follow you. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n We've lost enough agents for one night. \n\n ETHAN \n You mean I've lost enough agents for one \n night. \n\n KITTRIDGE seems to be at the point of saying one thing, then, \n carefully: \n \n KITTRIDGE \n You seem hell bent on blaming yourself, \n Ethan. \n\n ETHAN \n Who else is left? \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Yes. I see your point. \n\n ETHAN \n Why was there another team? \n\n KITTRIDGE \n What? \n\n ETHAN \n Of IMF agents. At the Embassy. Tonight. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n I don't quite follow you. \n\n ETHAN\n Let's see if you can follow me around \n this room. \n (eyes moving around the room) \n The drunk Russians on the embankment at 7 \n and 8 o'clock...The couple waltzing \n around me at the Embassy at 9 and 11. \n The waiter behind Hannah at the top of \n the staircase - Bowtie, 12 o'clock. The \n other IMF team. You're worried about me. \n Why?\n\n KITTRIDGE \n (a tight little smile) \n You're right. Maybe this'll save some \n time. \n\n The figures around the room have grown restless. KITTRIDGE \n tries to indicate that it's okay. He pulls some papers out \n of his jacket. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n For a little over two years now we've \n been spotting serious blowback in IMF \n operations. We have a penetration. The \n other day we decoded a message on the \n Internet from a Czech we know as \"Max.\"\n\n ETHAN \n The arms dealer. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n That's right. Max, it seems, has two \n unique gifts -- a capacity for anonymity\n and for corrupting susceptible agents. \n This time he's gotten to someone on the \n inside - he's put himself in a position \n to buy our NOC list. An operation he \n referred to as \"Job 314\". The job he \n thought Golitsyn was doing tonight. \n\n ETHAN \n But the list Golitsyn stole was a decoy. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Correct the actual list is safe at \n Langley. \"Golitsyn\" was a lightning rod, \n one of ours. \n\n ETHAN \n This whole operation was a molehunt. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Yes, the mole's deep inside. And -- like \n you said. You survived. \n\n ETHAN stares at him levelly. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D)\n I want to show you something, Ethan. \n\n He now shoves the papers across the table. They're xeroxed \n copies of a Wisconsin bank account in the name of DONALD and \n MARGARET ETHAN HUNT. It shows a balance of $127, 000. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n Since your father's death, your family's \n farm has been in sub-chapter S and now, \n suddenly, they're flush with over a \n hundred and twenty grand in the bank. \n Dad's illness was supposed to have wiped \n out the bank account -- dying slowly in \n America after all, can be a very \n expensive proposition Ethan. So, why \n don't we go quietly out of here onto the \n plane... \n\n ETHAN \n How about if we just go quietly into the \n bathroom and I wash your mouth out with \n soap - you pathetic button down \n bureaucratic asshole. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n Ethan, I can understand you're very \n upset. \n\n ETHAN \n Kitteridge, you've never seen me very \n upset. \n\n ETHAN takes something from his jacket pocket. While \n KITTRIDGE talks, ETHAN unwraps whatever is in his hand. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n All right, enough is enough Hunt. You've \n bribed, cajoled, killed - and relied on \n intimate loyalties to get away with it. \n You're determined to shake hands with the \n devil and I'm going to make sure you do \n it in hell. \n\n We see what ETHAN holds in his hand -- it's the piece of \n bubble gum, half red, half green. He squeezes the gum, \n mushing the two sides together. \n\n ETHAN lashes out, swatting KITTRIDGE'S glass of wine off the\n table in one quick motion. As he does, he hurls the piece of \n gum. \n\n Diners look up, startled at the sound of the breaking wine \n glass. KITTRIDGE follows the trajectory of the glass -- \n\n -- and sees the piece of gum, stuck to the tank. His eyes \n widen. KA BOOM! \n\n The tiny piece of plastique explodes, SHATTERING the fish \n tank. A hundred gallons of water flow over the MAN and \n WOMAN, knocking them to the ground. \n\n At the same time, ETHAN bolts for the door. \n\n EXT. OLD TOWN SQUARE - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN races out of the restaurant and takes off, into the \n deserted square. \n\n EXT. SAFE HOUSE - ENTRYWAY - NIGHT\n\n Silence. ETHAN enters the darkened entry. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE STAIRWELL - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN glances up at the stairwell. Naked light bulbs \n illuminate the way up. He slips off his jacket and shirt, \n then puts his jacket back on. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE STAIRWELL - MOMENTS LATER - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN unscrews a bulb. He crushes the bulb in his shirt and \n scatters the glass fragments on the steps. He climbs to the \n next bulb. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - DOORWAY - NIGHT\n\n At the now-darkened door to the apartment, there's the soft \n sound of another bulb being POPPED in cloth, glass fragments \n dropping and ETHAN'S at the door. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT \n\n In the darkened safe house, ETHAN goes to a vase with \n flowers, picks it up and unscrews the bottom, retrieving a \n Sig Sauer automatic. He moves through the rooms, checking \n them as he goes. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE BATHROOM - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN checks the shower, then goes to his shaving kit, \n pulling out a shaving cream can and a hairspray can. He \n unscrews the bottoms, retrieving cash in various \n denominations from various countries and a couple of \n passports. \n\n As he pockets them, he catches sight of himself in the\n mirror. He's a mess. He splashes water on his face. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN greedily tears the cap off a bottle of mineral water \n and proceeds to guzzle it as if he was dying of thirst. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT\n\n He comes back into the living room. Still drinking, he \n notices flickering lights on the other side of the room, the \n static from the four monitors PHELPS was watching. One by \n one, he switches them off. \n\n THE LAPTOP \n\n JACK had been using lies closed at his abandoned desk. ETHAN \n wakes it up. \n \n The computer emits a DIAL TONE, then STATIC as it hits its \n connection. It prompts ETHAN along: \n\n SELECT USENET GROUP\n\n ETHAN TYPES IN \n\n job 314\n\n ETHAN\n Job. Job 3:14. March fourteen. Job 31 \n March. \n\n The computer replies: \n\n SEARCHING STRING NOT FOUND\n\n ETHAN tries again: \n\n max.com\n\n The answer: \n\n SEARCH STRING NOT FOUND\n\n He tries a few more, quickly -- \"job,\" \"jobs,\" \"joblist.com,\" \n but nothing comes up. He tries something else -- \"scroll \n usenet groups.\" \n\n The computer scrolls names of bulletin boards at a dizzying \n speed, by the hundreds. That's not going anywhere. \n\n ETHAN pauses, slaking his bottomless thirst and trying to \n figure out what permutation of \"job 314\" he should add to the \n others on his computer screen. He MUMBLES. \n\n ETHAN \n Job three fourteen. Job --\n (a realization, \n the Biblical pronunciation) \n It's Job! \n\n He rummages around on the desk, checks the bookshelf and \n finds a Gideon Bible. He turns to Job 3:14 and reads the \n Bible passage \"Kings and Counsellors...\" \n\n He thinks for another moment, then punches back into the \n Internet and under the command \"Select Usenet Group\" he \n types: \n\n BIBLE\n\n The computer replies: \n\n 126 ENTRIES FOUND, SPECIFY GROUP\n\n ETHAN: \n\n BOOK OF JOB\n\n The computer presents a multi-colored screen of religious \n icons and artwork with an accompanying message: \n\n WELCOME TO THE BOOK OF JOB DISCUSSION \n GROUP. WHICH CHAPTER AND VERSE DO \n YOU WISH TO POST YOUR ENTRY UNDER?\n\n ETHAN types his answer \"Job 3:14\" and the screen presents a \n \"stickie\" for him to write his message on. He does: \n\n ETHAN \n Max -- Goods tainted. Consider extremely \n hazardous. DO NOT USE. Fate will be \n that of kings and counsellors who built \n for themselves palaces now lying in \n ruins. Must meet to discuss a.s.a.p. \n\n ANGLE\n\n A rhythmic CRUNCHING sound and from the darkness on the other \n side of the room, PHELPS staggers toward him, wet and muddy, \n his middle a hopelessly bloody mess. He looks like he's \n dying on his feet. ETHAN freezes, appalled. \n\n PHELPS\n Ethan, what are you doing? \n\n ETHAN tries to speak but nothing will come out. \n\n PHELPS (CONT'D) \n I needed you, Ethan. 1 needed you on the \n bridge, and -- you weren't there. Ethan? \n Ethan? \n\n ETHAN reaches out to grab PHELPS but can't seem to touch him. \n PHELPS suddenly vanishes into thin air, ETHAN awakens from \n the dream and finds himself leaping to his feet, gun cocked \n and pointed at -- \n\n ANGLE\n\n It's CLAIRE. \n\n ETHAN \n What are you doing here?! \n\n CLAIRE freezes, her hands half-raised. \n\n CLAIRE \n (carefully) \n Ethan -- Ethan, it's okay. It's Claire. \n Ethan what's wrong with you? \n\n ETHAN \n Don't move. \n\n Her right hand has moved a fraction. She freezes again. \n\n ETHAN \n You were in the car! \n\n CLAIRE \n I wasn't. I heard that Jim was in \n trouble on the radio. He said someone \n was... \n\n ETHAN \n Shut up! I saw you. You were in the \n car. \n\n CLAIRE \n No, I got out of the car and I ran to the\n bridge. \n\n ETHAN \n Don't give me that! I was on the bridge. \n\n CLAIRE \n What happened to Jim? \n\n ETHAN \n There was nobody on the bridge. \n\n CLAIRE \n What happened to Jim? \n\n Ethan grabs her wrists, shouting. \n\n ETHAN \n Dead. Dead. Dead! Wake up, Claire! \n Jim's dead, they're dead. They're all \n dead! \n\n ETHAN releases her wrists. \n\n CLAIRE \n (mumbling) \n They're dead. Jim's dead. \n\n ETHAN\n Take off your coat. \n\n CLAIRE \n What? \n\n ETHAN \n Take off your God damn coat! \n\n He grabs a sleeve and literally tears the coat off her, half- \n spinning her around. The coat hits the floor like a dead \n body. CLAIRE'S instinctive move is to cover her chest. \n\n CLAIRE begins to shiver. ETHAN circles her, runs his hand \n cursorily across her body. It accentuates CLAIRE'S \n shivering. \n\n ETHAN (CONT'D) \n Where were you? \n\n CLAIRE \n I walked away. He said abort. He was \n gone so I walked away. \n\n ETHAN \n That was four hours ago! Who sent you? \n Did they send you here? \n\n CLAIRE \n (slowly) \n Who is \"they?\" \n\n ETHAN \n Did they send you...Did they send you? \n\n CLAIRE \n Who is they, who is they? \n\n ETHAN grabs her by the wrists. \n\n ETHAN \n Who sent you?! Who sent you? \n\n CLAIRE \n (screaming) \n No one sent me! We're supposed to be \n back here at four o'clock, four o'clock, \n if we abort, we don't return here until \n four o'clock, 0-four hundred, four am, \n four o'clock --! \n\n She sags. A moment. Then the clock begins to chime -- BONG, \n BONG, BONG, BONG. In the wake of the bells' reverb, ETHAN \n releases his grip on her wrists. \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - LATER THE SAME NIGHT\n\n ETHAN sits in front of the computer, staring blankly at it, \n still waiting for a response. CLAIRE sitting on the end of \n the bed. Dawn approaches, it's very, very quiet. \n\n CLAIRE \n Why haven't they brought us in yet? \n\n ETHAN\n I've been disavowed. They think I killed \n Jim and everyone else. Somehow a hundred \n thousand dollars found its way into my \n parents' bank account. Kittridge assumes \n I'm a mole they've been tracing and I've \n been in the employ of an arms dealer, \n Max, for the last two years, to get him \n our NOC list. \n\n A long moment while she stares at ETHAN's back. \n\n CLAIRE \n What are you going to do? \n\n ETHAN \n I'm going to get it for him. Whoever the \n mole is, I think goes by the name of Job, \n at least part of the time. 1 can't find \n him, but if he knows 1 have the NOC list, \n he'll find me. \n \n CLAIRE \n Ethan, you're not making sense. Let me \n go in and talk to Kittridge. I'm going \n to tell him you had nothing to do... \n\n ETHAN\n Claire, Claire, Claire, if you're not \n dead, he's going to assume you're with \n me. \n\n The computer blinks and makes a noise - ETHAN goes to it. \n\n THE COMPUTER SCREEN\n\n Blinking -- \"MESSAGE WAITING.\" ETHAN hurries over and clicks \n on the message box. The screen blinks and the message shows \n up: \n\n ? JOB - CORNER OF NEKAZANKA AND PRlKOPY ONE P.M. \n\n ? BUY A PACKET OF DUNHILL \n\n ? AND ASK THE MAN SITTING ON THE BUS \n\n ? STOP BENCH FOR A MATCH\n\n CLAIRE looks to ETHAN. \n\n CLAIRE \n The message is for Job. \n\n ETHAN\n I'm going to answer it. \n\n EXT. STREET BY BANK/FLORENC BUS STOP - DAY\n\n ETHAN arrives at the bus stop outside the Savoy Arcade. A \n MAN in a black wind-breaker sits on the bench, his back to \n ETHAN. \n\n ETHAN \n Excuse me, could I trouble you for a \n match? \n\n Without turning, the MAN offers up a box of matches. As \n ETHAN takes them, TWO MEN from behind take him by either arm \n and escort him into a car which has just pulled up. \n\n INT. CAR - DAY\n\n ETHAN slides into the back seat, between the TWO MEN. \n MATTHIAS, the man on the left, holds up a black hood. He \n extends it to ETHAN, who doesn't take it. \n\n MATTHIAS\n Would you remove your hat please? \n\n ETHAN \n Why? \n\n MATTHIAS \n You wish to meet Max? This is the price \n of admission. \n\n Reluctantly, Ethan pulls the hood over his head and the car \n takes off. \n\n INT. MAX'S APARTMENT - DAY\n\n The black hood still on his head, ETHAN has trouble sitting \n upright. He's before a desk, in an apartment somewhere in \n the city -- it's impossible to tell where, as the blinds are \n drawn. The place is roomy and lavishly furnished -- \n expensive Oriental rugs, well-chosen objects of art. \n\n Somewhere down the block, a dog BARKS, steadily, every few \n seconds. In the hallway outside the apartment door, someone \n is VACUUMING. MATTHIAS and the OTHER MAN are nearby. \n\n ETHAN\n I thought I was going to see Max. \n\n MATTHIAS \n You misunderstood. No one sees Max. \n\n ETHAN \n Then what am I doing here? \n\n MATTHIAS \n Allowing Max to see you and hear what \n you've got to say. \n\n ETHAN \n I don't communicate very well through a \n shroud. \n\n MATTHIAS \n If Max doesn't like what you have to say, \n you'll be wearing that shroud \n indefinitely. \n\n ETHAN \n I'm willing to take the chance. \n\n MATTHIAS \n Very well. \n\n MAX'S figure into frame. MATTHIAS removes ETHAN's hood. \n When it comes off ETHAN finds himself looking up at a tall \n woman of indeterminate age. She's handsome to the point of \n severity. \n\n MAX \n Who are you and what are you doing here? \n \n ETHAN \n I need one hundred thousand dollars. \n\n MAX\n Really? And you thought if you simply \n showed up I might give it to you? \n\n ETHAN \n Why not? You gave Job a hundred and \n twenty five thousand. \n\n MAX \n The penny drops. You are not Job. Yes, \n Job is not given to quoting Scripture in \n his communications. And there was its \n tone -- aggressive but playful. Job is \n not playful. So you're something of a \n paradox. \n\n ETHAN \n That depends. \n\n MAX\n On what? \n\n ETHAN \n Whether you like a paradox. I want a \n hundred and fifty thousand dollars. \n\n MAX\n It's quite out of the question. \n\n ETHAN \n The disk Job sold you is worthless. It's \n bait, part of an internal molehunt. \n\n MAX\n And how might you know that? Are you \n another Company man? \n\n ETHAN \n Like Job? \n\n MAX \n Ah, but, we're asking about you. \n\n ETHAN\n I'm NOC. Was. Now disavowed. \n\n MAX \n Why, may I ask? \n\n ETHAN\n That's the question I want to ask Job. \n\n MAX \n I don't know Job any more than he knows \n me. \n\n ETHAN \n Even so, I'm sure you could arrange an \n introduction. \n\n MAX \n Why should I? \n\n ETHAN \n Because I can deliver the actual NOC \n list. The one you have is not only \n worthless, it's certain to be equipped \n with a homing device to pinpoint your \n exact location. \n\n MAX \n It's easy to say the disk is worthless \n when you say I can't look at the \n information and see if it's worthless. \n Not a tenable position, sir. \n\n ETHAN \n Okay, boot it up and in anywhere from \n thirty seconds to ten minutes you're \n gonna have Virginia farm boys hopping \n around you like jackrabbits. \n\n MAX \n (Pause.) \n Mm - Hmmm... \n\n ETHAN\n Tell you what. How good's the RF scanner \n you used in the car? \n\n MAX \n Very good. \n\n ETHAN \n Okay, use it. But I suggest pack up \n first. \n\n ANGLE\n\n MATTHIAS boots up. There's a little musical noise and the \n screen brightens. The computer WHIRS and CLICKS and a \n complex list of names, addresses, phone numbers and other \n personal information scrolls by. But Matthias is watching \n the digital read-out on the RF scanner. \n\n MATTHIAS \n Twenty-six, twenty-seven. So far so \n good. \n\n MAX \n That's not so good for you, my friend. \n\n On the scanner, the digital read-out is now in the thirties. \n\n MATTHIAS \n Thirty-two and change. \n\n MAX \n (to Ethan) \n Doesn't mean it's a signal. Could just \n be the hard drive heating up. \n\n She looks from the scanner to ETHAN as if she's trying to \n make up her mind about something. \n\n MATTHIAS \n Forty-four. Forty-five. \n\n ETHAN \n I'd say you've got about two minutes. \n\n MAX still doubts it. The OTHER MAN goes to the windows -- \n\n --nothing happens. He opens the French doors that lead out \n onto a balcony. \n\n EXT. MAX'S APARTMENT - BALCONY - DAY\n\n The OTHER MAN comes out on the balcony. Nothing out here but \n a beautiful day. He walks to the railing and looks down at \n the street. \n\n Down below, the dog that's still barking is tied to a street \n sign. WOOF. WOOF. WOOF. Abruptly, it stops. \n\n INT. MAX'S APARTMENT - DAY \n\n Back inside: \n\n MATTHIAS\n Fifty-seven. Fifty-nine. \n\n EXT. MAX'S APARTMENT\n\n A pollution control van and a taxi arrive amidst other street \n activity. KITTRIDGE and the FEMALE CZECH AGENT exit the taxi \n as BARNES and TWO OTHER UNDERCOVER MALE IMF agents leave the \n van. \n\n INT. MAX'S BUILDING - LOBBY - DAY\n\n Led by KITTRIDGE, the FIVE IMF AGENTS wearing Kevlar-lined \n trenchcoats creep through the lobby of the building and hit \n the stairs. They climb them silently. \n\n INT. MAX'S BUILDING HALLWAY - DAY\n\n A CLEANING WOMAN is vacuuming the hall carpeting when the \n AGENTS come up the stairs, guns drawn. Her jaw drops and she \n turns off the vacuum cleaner. \n\n FEMALE IMF \n (in czech) \n Switch it on. Keep cleaning. \n\n KITTRIDGE looks at her sharply and gestures. She turns the \n vacuum back on. They reach the door of a certain apartment \n and -- \n\n INT. APARTMENT - DAY\n\n -- KICK through it. The AGENTS swarm into MAX'S apartment, \n guns waving in all directions. KITTRIDGE sweeps in between \n them and takes command of the place -- \n\n --but there's nobody here. TWO AGENTS race into the bedroom, \n and just as quickly out again. \n\n EXT. POWDER TOWER - TOP SHOT - DAY\n\n MAX, ETHAN, MATTHIAS and the OTHER MAN move quickly across \n the bridge that connects Max's apartment to the tower. \n\n EXT. MAX'S APARTMENT BALCONY - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE kicks open the door to the balcony, comes outside, \n and looks around. Nobody in sight. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n GOD D- \n\n INT. MAX'S CAR - ETHAN AND MAX - DAY \n\n MAX \n Oh dear, Gunther will never let me use \n one of his apartments again. \n (turns to Ethan) \n Phew, sorry I doubted you, dear boy. \n You're a good sport. Do accept the \n compliment. \n\n ETHAN \n Thanks, Max. Or is it Maxine? \n\n INT. CAR - MOVING - DAY \n\n MAX\n I don't have to tell you what a comfort \n anonymity can be in my profession -- like \n a warm blanket. \n (abruptly) \n My deal with Job was subject to a \n successful boot scan. Obviously it \n didn't pass muster. Deal's off. \n\n ETHAN \n What was your deal with Job? \n\n MAX \n Six million dollars. I'll give you the \n same. But I want the complete list now, \n not just Eastern Europe. I won't do this \n piecemeal, it's too dangerous. I want \n the entire list, the true name of every \n non-official cover agent throughout the \n world. \n\n ETHAN \n Ten million. Ten million in negotiable \n U.S. Treasury certificates, in bearer \n form, coupons attached. And one more \n thing -- your personal assurance that Job \n will be at the exchange. \n\n MAX \n Done. Bring it to me in London. I want \n it by the end of the week. \n\n ETHAN\n How will you make sure Job will be there? \n\n MAX\n How will you make sure I'll have the list \n in three days? It's been a delight. Now \n where can I drop you dear boy? \n\n ETHAN \n I'm not being dropped anywhere without my \n money. \n\n MAX manages to laugh without coughing. Then, with an \n admonishing forefinger: \n\n MAX \n I'm going to have to front you \n personally. Don't lose that money \n without losing your life. \n\n ETHAN \n I wouldn't dream of it. \n\n MAX settles back and regards ETHAN. A theatrical sigh. She \n fancies this guy. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n INT. MAX'S APARTMENT - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE waits on the balcony for his AGENTS to complete \n their search. HARRY BARNES, a middle-aged, gray suited, \n somewhat gray-faced bureaucrat, comes to join Kittridge. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n The man's gone black, Barnes. He's under \n until he decides to surface. \n\n BARNES \n Look we can use someone from the Embassy \n and we can get the local authorities \n involved. Close off his transportation. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n What can we do, Barnes? Put a guy at the \n airport? How many identities do you \n think Hunt has? How many times has he \n slipped past custom, in how many \n countries? These guys are trained to be \n ghosts. We taught them how to do it, for \n Christ's sake! \n\n BARNES \n So what do you suggest? \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Let's not waste time chasing him. Make \n him come to us. Everybodyís got pressure \n points. Find out something that's \n important to him personally and you \n squeeze. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - DAY\n\n ETHAN enters the living room. CLAIRE walks out of the \n bedroom holding a gun. \n\n ETHAN reaches into his jacket and holds up a hefty wad of \n currency. \n\n CLAIRE \n Max made a deal with you? \n\n ETHAN\n I deliver the NOC list, Max delivers Job. \n\n CLAIRE \n We've got seventy-five rounds for your \n Glock 9, but only twenty for the Sig \n Sauer, one pair of Visco glasses with \n monitor, plenty of passports. You said \n it yourself -- if I'm not dead, I'm with \n you. \n\n ETHAN \n You're sure about this? \n\n CLAIRE \n Jim was my husband. I want to know who \n killed him. ( ALT ) I want to get the son \n of a bitch who did this. \n\n ETHAN\n We need help, and we don't have time. \n They have to be local. \n\n CLAIRE \n What kind of help? \n\n INT. SAFE HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER - DAY\n\n The KY57 crypto phone, a black box with an ordinary phone \n receiver in the top, THUNKS down on the table. \n\n ETHAN plugs the phone cable from his laptop into the back. \n The green display on top of the KY57 dials a number and makes \n a computer connection. \n\n On the computer, the screen says: \n\n I.M.F. PERSONNEL DATABASE \n ENTER PASSWORD NOW\n\n ETHAN types a password and the screen asks him for the \n\n CATEGORY?\n\n He types in a single word. \n\n DISAVOWED\n\n DISSOLVE TO:\n\n INT. TRAIN - STATEROOM - NIGHT\n \n The word \"disavowed\" dissolves slowly over the stateroom of a \n high speed train, where the newly assembled IM force has \n gathered around a table -- KRIEGER, a dangerous-looking \n Frenchman of forty or so, LUTHER STICKELL, a muscular, soft- \n spoken American in his mid-thirties. ETHAN, and CLAIRE. \n LUTHER regards the others warily. \n\n ETHAN\n Simple game. Four players. \n (points to Krieger) \n Exfil opens the pocket -- \n (and to Luther)\n -- cyber ops lifts the wallet. \n\n KRIEGER \n Bank? \n\n ETHAN \n IMF mainframe. \n\n KRIEGER \n (after a moment) \n Where exactly is it? \n\n ETHAN \n In Langley. \n\n LUTHER \n In Langley? The one in Virginia, Langley? \n\n KRIEGER \n Inside CIA headquarters at Langley. \n\n ETHAN nods. KRIEGER turns to CLAIRE. \n\n KRIEGER (CONT'D) \n Is he serious? \n\n CLAIRE \n Always. \n\n KRIEGER \n If we're going to Virginia, why don't we \n drop by Fort Knox? I can fly a \n helicopter right in through the lobby and \n set it down inside the vault and it will \n be a hell of a lot easier than breaking \n into the God damn CIA. \n\n LUTHER \n What are we downloading? \n\n ETHAN \n Information. \n\n LUTHER \n What kind? \n\n ETHAN \n Profitable. \n\n CLAIRE \n Payment on delivery. \n\n LUTHER \n I don't know. This I don't know. \n\n ETHAN\n This doesn't sound like the Luther \n Stickell I've heard of. What'd they used \n to call you? The Net Ranger? Phineas \n Phreak? The only man alive who actually \n hacked NATO Ghostcom. \n\n LUTHER \n There was never any physical evidence \n that I had anything to do with that.. \n that.. \n (correcting himself) \n With that exceptional piece of work. \n\n ETHAN \n You don't know what you're missing. This \n is the Mt. Everest of hacks. \n\n LUTHER \n You're all kidding yourselves. Even with \n top of the line crypto. Cray access. \n STU 3's -- \n\n CLAIRE \n Krieger can get it. \n (to Krieger) \n Right? \n\n KRIEGER \n May take a little time. \n\n ETHAN\n May take a little time. That's not what \n Claire tells me about you. \n\n LUTHER \n Thinking Machine laptops, I'm talking \n about the 686 prototypes -- with the \n artificial intelligence Risk chip -- \n\n ETHAN looks at KRIEGER. \n\n KRIEGER \n Twenty-four hours. \n\n ETHAN looks back at LUTHER. LUTHER thinks. \n\n LUTHER \n And I get to keep the equipment when \n we're done. \n\n ETHAN \n Luther, I guess you're all out of \n excuses.\n\n LUTHER \n I can't just hack my way inside. There's \n no modem access to the mainframe, it's in \n a stand-alone. I'd have to be physically \n at the terminal. \n\n ETHAN \n Luther, relax, it's worse than you think. \n The terminal's in black vault lock-down. \n\n INT. CIA CORRIDOR/GUARD STATION - DAY\n\n While ETHAN talks, we see what he's referring to: \n\n A CIA ANALYST carrying a glass of iced tea and several file \n folders walks down a long corridor in the headquarters \n building. He comes to an impressive guard station and rests \n his chin on a strange-looking optometric device. \n\n ETHAN (V.O.) \n They missed nothing in that room. Even \n the vents have laser nets over them. \n\n Apparently the device approves and the ANALYST is buzzed into \n a \"RESTRICTED\" area of the building. \n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ANTEROOM - DAY\n\n The ANALYST reaches a curtained area. He shoves the curtain \n aside and comes to a large, vaulted door. He slides a card- \n key into a slot, leaves it there and slides a second card-key \n into the slot beneath it. \n\n ETHAN (V.O.)\n Inside, there are three countermeasure \n systems that can only be deactivated by \n authorized entry. Which we won't have. \n\n A panel next to the ANALYST says \"INTRUSION COUNTERMEASURES \n OFF.\" The ANALYST next spins a three digit combination code, \n CHUNKS the door open and steps into -- \n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ROOM - DAY\n\n -- the secured terminal room. It's not large but it's \n impressive. A single terminal is bolted into the middle of \n the floor and the glass and tile walls of the room overlook \n computer storage towers. \n\n ETHAN (V.O.) \n The first system is sound-sensitive, \n anything above a whisper sets it off. \n The second system is on the floor and \n pressure-sensitive --\n\n The ANALYST closes the vault door behind him and walks across \n the room. As he walks, the floor tiles light up under his \n feet, turning off again when he lifts the weight from them. \n\n ETHAN (V.O.) \n --and the third detects any increase in \n temperature. Even the body heat of an \n unauthorized person in the room will \n trigger it. \n\n A thermometer on the wall shows the temperature is 72 \n degrees. The ANALYST sets his glass down, boots up the \n computer, and starts entering data from the file folders. \n\n ETHAN (V.O.) \n All three systems are state of the art. \n \n The ANALYST turns and takes a sip of his iced tea. A drop of \n condensation runs down the glass and hits the floor. When it \n makes contact, the floor panel lights up. \n\n INT. TRAIN STATEROOM - NIGHT\n\n The other team members gathered around the table look at \n ETHAN skeptically. \n\n LUTHER \n And you really think we can do this. \n\n INT. TRAIN CORRIDOR - NIGHT \n\n The middle of the night and the train is dark. The team \n members come out of the stateroom to go to bed -- KRIEGER \n heads in one direction, ETHAN and CLAIRE in the other.\n\n ETHAN stops. His attention is drawn to the car ahead. There \n is a window in the door to the car and he looks through it. \n\n ETHAN'S P.O.V. THRU WINDOW (INT. BUSINESS CAR - NIGHT)\n\n Ethan sees the business car, a plush space for busy \n executives to get some work done on the train. There are \n laptops, cellular phones, desks that fold out in front of \n spacious seats. \n\n A FEMALE EXECUTIVE, forty or so, is seated at one of the \n desks, typing away into her laptop. \n\n INT. TRAIN - CORRIDOR - NIGHT\n\n ETHAN knocks on the compartment door. \n\n ETHAN \n May I come in? \n\n CLAIRE \n (wary but interested) \n Sure... \n\n INT. TRAIN - CLAIREíS COMPARTMENT - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN and CLAIRE enter, ETHAN closing the compartment door. \n He pulls an envelope from his jacket and holds it out to her. \n She takes it, waits. \n\n ETHAN \n It's cash. And a second passport. If \n anything goes wrong when we're inside, if \n you sense even the slightest deviation \n don't look over your shoulder, you walk \n away - you hear me? Just walk away. \n\n CLAIRE \n You don't think we're going to make it. \n\n ETHAN \n I didn't say that. \n\n CLAIRE \n You didn't have to......... \n\n ETHAN\n I just need you to be safe. \n\n CLAIRE\n What about you? \n\n ETHAN\n What about me - Jim called an abort - I \n didn't comply. I lost the team. I just \n need you to be safe. \n\n CLAIRE's coolness causes ETHAN to hesitate just enough to \n take it in. \n\n CLAIRE \n I wish I'd never laid eyes on you.. \n\n And they're suddenly, violently in each others arms, kissing \n and half-falling onto the converted bed. She suddenly \n resists. He senses it and pulls away. \n\n ETHAN \n Sorry. \n\n He rises and goes to the door. He's got his hand on the knob \n when CLAIRE wraps her arms around him from behind, turns him \n to her and kisses him, deeply. This time they sink slowly to \n the bed. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. CIA LANGLEY - DAY \n\n Seen from the air, CIA headquarters is a sprawling complex, \n two huge buildings surrounded by acres of parking lots hacked \n out of a thick forest. \n\n LANGLEY\n\n INT. COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - DAY \n\n KITTRIDGE, BARNES, and their STAFF are hard at work, \n photographs and biographical data of ETHAN on various \n computer and television screens around the room. KITTRIDGE \n leans back in his chair, staring at the ceiling. \n\n BARNES \n What I want to know is how Hunt accessed \n the disavowed file, even after we cut off \n his authorization code. \n\n AGENT LOWDEN/AGENT \n MAREK \n He may have used Phelps' code. They were \n friends, and Phelps, was still valid for \n twenty-four hours. \n\n BARNES \n If that's the case, we need to implement \n a system to immediately deactivate an \n agent's code immediately... \n\n KITTRIDGE brings his chair legs down on the floor with a \n BANG. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n I can't believe what I'm listening to. \n Hunt just kicked us in the ass, you guys \n are standing here trying to figure out \n what kind of shoes he had on! I don't\n care how he did it, I want to know why he \n did it! Is he recruiting? For what \n purpose? \n\n From somewhere in the building, an ALARM sounds, not too loud \n in here. \n\n AGENT PAT/AGENT \n LOWDEN \n Survival. \n\n The alarm get louder as it goes off in another part of the \n building. \n\n KITTRIDGE\n Too short sighted. This guy's proactive,\n he initiates. The question is what does \n he want now and where does he need to get \n it and Barnes what the hell is that\n noise?! \n\n An AGENT is just coming in from the hallway. \n\n AGENT \n Fire alarm, Gene. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Oh, for -- do we have to evacuate? \n\n BARNES\n That's S.O.P.. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n S.O.P.. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. VIRGINIA TWO LANE HIGHWAY - DAY\n\n SIRENS BLARING, three fire trucks race past an inconspicuous \n gray van parked on the shoulder of a two lane highway. \n\n INT. CIA LANGLEY LOBBY - DAY \n\n Three FIREMEN stomp into the main lobby of the CIA \n headquarters building. ETHAN and KRIEGER are among them, in \n firemen's jumpsuits, carrying packs of equipment. \n\n ETHAN takes a breath as they cross to the GUARD's desk. He \n looks up, above him. \n\n Etched into the top of one wall are the words \"AND YE SHALL \n KNOW THE TRUTH AND THE TRUTH SHALL MAKE YOU FREE.\"\n\n They reach the GUARD. ETHAN, who wears Visco glasses, elbows \n to the front of the group and takes charge. \n\n ETHAN \n (to the Guard) \n We picked up alarms in sectors three, \n seven, and twelve. \n\n The GUARD checks a screen in front of him. \n\n GUARD RICHARD \n Yeah. That's what I've got too. \n\n The FIREMEN look at each other. Who is this guy? But he \n seems to know what he's talking about, so -- \n\n ETHAN \n (to the Guard) \n What sector's the air conditioning? \n\n GUARD RANDALL \n Uh -- twenty-one, but there's no alarm in \n sector twenty-one. \n\n ETHAN \n I gotta go in there and shut it down! \n\n GUARD RANDALL \n Nobody goes into any sector where the \n alarm didn't go off. \n\n ETHAN\n Do you want to blow the fire through the \n whole building? \n\n GUARD RICHARD \n (reciting policy) \n Nobody goes into any sector where the \n alarm did not go off --\n\n EXT. CIA LANGLEY - PARKING AREA - DAY \n\n One fire truck is parked slightly behind the others in the \n parking area of the headquarters building. Second truck \n roars past. LUTHER watches it go. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY\n\n LUTHER is in the belly of the fire truck with a ton of \n equipment -- three laptops, a bundle of phone cable, a mini- \n dish antenna, a cellular phone, several thick phone company \n manuals with names like \"COSMOS\" and \"SWITCHED ACCESS \n SERVICE.\" \n\n One laptop serves as a Visco monitor, showing a video image \n in which LUTHER watches ETHAN'S point of view of the stubborn \n GUARD, who's finishing his sentence. \n \n GUARD \n (on screen) \n --and it did not go off in twenty-one! \n\n LUTHER turns to a screen on another computer and searches \n through a complex facilities menu. \n\n LUTHER \n (mouths) \n Twenty-one, twenty-one --\n\n He finds what he's looking for and double clicks on it. A \n red box on his screen lights up -- \n\n INT. CIA LANGLEY - LOBBY - DAY \n\n -- and the same red box lights up on the GUARD'S screen. \n From in the distance, a new ALARM begins to wail. \n\n GUARD RANDALL \n Wait! Hold it - it's on. Let's go. \n\n ETHAN\n Let's move! \n\n ETHAN turns and looks at one of the FIREMEN behind them -- \n it's CLAIRE. CLAIRE and KRIEGER follow ETHAN/GUARD to \n corridor. \n\n INT. CIA STORAGE ROOM - DAY \n\n CLAIRE quickly slips out of her fireman's jumpsuit, revealing \n a business suit underneath. She clips an ID tag to her \n breast pocket. \n\n She pulls a piece of paper from her pocket, a computer \n printout of a man's ID photo. She stares at the face, \n studying it. \n\n INT. CIA CAFETERIA - DAY \n\n CLAIRE, carrying a cup of coffee and a muffin, looks for a \n spot among the tables in the cafeteria of the headquarters \n building. \n\n She sees a MAN sitting alone, reading a newspaper. It's the \n man whose picture she looked at in the storage room. She \n sits next to him. \n\n He looks up and gives her an acknowledging half smile, then \n goes back to his paper. \n\n He turns to pick up the paper and in the moment he is facing \n the other way, CLAIRE pulls out a small vial resembling a \n perfume sampler. She dumps the clear liquid contents into \n his coffee. He turns back and hands her part of the paper. \n CLAIRE smiles. \n\n COFFEE MAN drinks up. CLAIRE stares at his shoulder \n strangely. He notices. \n\n She reaches out and flicks something off his shoulder blade. \n\n He smiles. But she hasn't flicked something off his shoulder \n blade, she's flicked something onto it -- a little piece of \n shiny gray metallic tape. CLAIRE leaves the table. COFFEE \n MAN drinks up and leaves the table. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY\n\n LUTHER stares at another one of his laptops, this one with a \n blueprint of the inside of the building. A cursor begins to \n flash in one of the rooms. LUTHER smiles. \n\n LUTHER \n Hi there. \n\n INT. CIA CORRIDOR/GUARD STATION - DAY \n\n A GUARD carrying an MP5, a handheld machine gun, leads ETHAN \n and KRIEGER to a heavy metal door marked SERVICE. \n\n GUARD \n Air conditioning's through here! \n\n They turn a corner, walking directly past -- \n\n -- COFFEE MAN, who's coming the other way. We stay with \n COFFEE MAN. \n\n INT. CIA LANGLEY - CORRIDORS - DAY \n \n COFFEE MAN comes out of the cafeteria, walks down the \n corridor. he goes to the restricted access door, taps the \n control panel. \n\n CIA ANALYST\n William Donloe. \n\n COFFEE MAN (ANALYST) walks past a GUARD desk and peers into \n an optometric scanner and we suddenly remember where we've \n seen COFFEE MAN before. He's the TECHNICIAN who works at the \n secured computer terminal. \n\n INT. CIA - SERVICE AREA - DAY \n\n ETHAN and KRIEGER in the service area - preparing. ETHAN \n putting the mask in a bag. \n\n The GUARD returns. \n\n GUARD \n Where's the other guy? \n\n The GUARD moves towards ETHAN, who kicks back at him, pushing \n him back to KRIEGER, who zaps the GUARD on the back of the \n neck. He twitches and slumps to the ground, unconscious. \n KRIEGER quickly grabs him around the neck. \n\n ETHAN turns. Holding the GUARD'S head with one hand, KRIEGER \n pulls a stiletto from the sheath in the back of his belt with \n the other. He jabs it toward the base of the GUARD'S skull - \n\n -- but ETHAN is on him in a flash. He grabs KRIEGER's knife \n arm shoving it up against the wall. Staring into KRIEGER'S \n face in warning. \n\n ETHAN \n Zero body count. \n\n KRIEGER \n (a threat) \n We'll see. \n\n ETHAN\n Time up. \n\n ETHAN releases him and walks away. \n\n INT. VERTICAL DUCT - DAY \n\n The Guard is tied up, lying on the floor of the Service Area \n Room. ETHAN and KRIEGER are below the open vent into the \n duct system. \n\n The first climb is straight up. KRIEGER cups his hands under \n ETHAN'S foot and lifts him up into the duct as he starts to \n climb. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n ETHAN and KRIEGER crawl quickly through the ducts, moving \n horizontally now. They reach a juncture and turn right. \n\n ETHAN \n 1 - 2 - 3 - Toast, toast. Luther, I'm \n going in. Don't disappoint me...Krieger, \n from here on in, absolute silence. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n ETHAN and KRIEGER reach a ventilator shaft in the duct. A \n laser net protects the ventilator, red shafts of light cris- \n crossing every which way. ETHAN looks down, through the net. \n\n He can see the computer room below and the top of the \n TECHNICIAN'S head. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n In the duct, ETHAN signals to KRIEGER, making a triangle of \n his hands. KRIEGER wriggles forward and hands him a multi- \n sided, pyramid shaped glass object. \n\n ETHAN raises the pyramid and intercepts a portion of one of \n the laser net's beams. The pyramid glows and we realise what \n it is -- a prism. \n\n The laser beam now captive in the prism, ETHAN carefully \n moves it out of the centre of the ventilator shaft and \n directs it toward another prism, clearing a path through the \n shaft. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n Up in the ceiling above it, one of the screws starts to move \n in the ventilator shaft, unscrewing. When it appears ready \n to drop out, a thin strip of metal snakes out from between \n the bars of the shaft and edges up next to the screw. \n\n The screw drops out of its hole but it doesn't drop to the \n floor, it zips over and clings to the side of the metal strip \n with a gentle CLICK, as to a magnet. \n\n The screw is pulled up, through the shaft. Now the whole \n shaft moves, down, into the room, held by a hand. \n\n It turns sideways and is pulled up, into the duct. \n\n A rubber tube snakes down, through the hole, coming to a stop \n near the thermostat, which says it's seventy-two degrees. A \n gentle WHOOSH is audible as frosty air blows through the \n tube, cooling the room. \n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ROOM - DAY\n\n The TECHNICIAN defaults the security systems outside the \n terminal room. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY\n\n It is eerily still in the locked-down computer room we saw \n earlier. No-one is there, there's not a sound but for the \n gentle HUM of the computer as it waits to be put to use. \n\n Now ETHAN's head descends slowly into the room, his hair \n falling in front of him. \n\n At first it seems he's just poking his head in for a look, \n but he keeps coming and coming -- first his head, then \n shoulders, then waist, then knees, and finally we see his \n ankles and understand. \n\n He is lowered to stop in front of the thermometer and \n temperature read out on the computer. Suddenly ETHAN is \n lifted back up quickly to hang at ceiling height above the \n computer as the ANALYST enters the room. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN crosses to the computer and sits down, a stack \n of work to his right. \n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN is working away at the computer. He pauses \n and wipes some sweat from his forehead. \n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n With a strange look on his face, the TECHNICIAN looks up. \n It's almost as if he senses ETHAN above him but instead -- \n\n TECHNICIAN \n Oh, God. \n\n -- he vomits. \n\n He reaches for the garbage can and upchucks again. Puzzled, \n sick and feeling another wave coming on, he drags himself to \n his feet, hauls himself across the room and leaves. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ANTEROOM - DAY \n\n Even sick, the TECHNICIAN still thinks to re-activate the \n alarm systems with a card-key. They HUM back to life \n efficiently, a light flashing: \n\n INTRUSION COUNTERMEASURES ON\n\n INT. CIA COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN descends again, slowly but steadily, until he is at the \n same height as the computer terminal to hang horizontally in \n front of the computer. \n\n A heavy velcro strap binds his ankles together, secured by a \n rope that leads up into the ventilator shaft and through the \n set of pulleys. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n KRIEGER holds the rope, his jaw clenched, sweat breaking out \n on his forehead. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n Unfortunately, he's three feet away from it. He stretches \n his arms but can't reach. \n\n He blinks, unable to believe this. He curls himself into a \n situp and looks up, into the shaft. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n KRIEGER sees the predicament. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN gestures to him, pointing to the floor. Slowly, \n KRIEGER drops him another few feet. Now ETHAN's lower than \n the terminal and still three feet away from it. \n \n He closes his eyes, summoning his strength and does another \n situp, bringing himself up right in front of the terminal. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n In the fire truck, LUTHER, who is watching on the Visco \n monitor, turns his head upside down to get a look at what \n ETHAN sees. \n\n He cups his hands around the microphone of his headset and \n begins to whisper. We hear only the moist, airy sound of his \n breath, not the words. \n\n LUTHER \n Type this password: AW96B6. Return. Go \n to the files menu, find the NOC list \n file. Open \"NOC List.\" Put your \n diskette in. Double click on the NOC \n list. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN's ear receiver WHISPERS ever-so-slightly. He reaches \n out, to the upside down keyboard, cranes his head to see it\n and starts typing, softly. \n\n The computer HUMS, activated. ETHAN unbuttons his pocket, \n withdraws a 3.5 disk and slides it gently into the floppy \n drive. \n\n The computer accepts it with a soft WHIR. ETHAN winces, even \n that soft sound is deafening in these circumstances. \n\n But no alarms go off. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n LUTHER cranes his head again to see the computer terminal \n through ETHAN's trembling viewpoint. He WHISPERS more \n commands.\n\n LUTHER \n Ok, good! It's scrolling. 0K, now we're \n going to download. Edit menu. Select \n \"copy to disc\". You're downloading. \n When it's all green it's done. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY\n\n ETHAN types in the contends, presses enter and the screen \n displays a comforting message: \n\n DOWNLOADING\n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n LUTHER'S eyes widen as he gets his first look, on the Visco \n monitor, of the specific information they're downloading. \n The NOC list. \n\n LUTHER \n Holy mother of God. \n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n KRIEGER shakes with the strain of holding the rope. His eyes \n suddenly widen as he sees something next to him. \n\n It's a rat. KRIEGER stares. The rat stares back. Neither \n moves. Puzzled by KRIEGER'S lack of response, the rat crawls \n forward, inquisitive. \n\n KRIEGER's eyes water, his nose twitches. He's about to \n sneeze. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n LUTHER pulls himself together and WHISPERS another command \n into the microphone. \n\n LUTHER \n You've done it. Eject it. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n The 3.5 disk is ejected from the floppy drive. ETHAN pockets \n it and signals to be raised. \n\n Slowly, his body starts to move up. As it does, a bead of \n sweat rolls down his nose, balling at the tip. \n\n ETHAN ignores it. But below him, he sees the floor tiles, \n four of them lit up under the wheels of the chair at the \n computer terminal. \n\n His eyes widen as he realizes something -- \n\n --the drop of sweat falls -- \n\n --and he catches it with his right hand. \n\n INT. CIA - MEN'S - DAY \n\n CIA ANALYST crosses corridor from restricted access door to \n bathroom. \n\n A toilet FLUSHES, smashing the silence, and the TECHNICIAN \n staggers out of the bathroom. He goes to the sink and throws \n some water on his face. He's still unaware of the piece of \n shiny metallic tape stuck to his shoulder blade. \n\n He walks out of the bathroom, crosses corridor to door. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n On one of LUTHER'S laptops, the blinking cursor starts to \n move down a corridor. LUTHER speaks into his microphone. \n\n LUTHER \n He's rolling. Get moving! \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN is near the ceiling, but KRIEGER isn't pulling any \n more. ETHAN looks up at him, wide-eyed and gestures to pull \n him up. KRIEGER shakes his head no. \n\n ETHAN gestures -- \"WHAT?!\" \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n The cursor is halfway across the screen. \n\n LUTHER \n Get out of there -- get out of there --\n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN still dangles. Holding the rope with one hand, KRIEGER \n holds out his other, demanding something. He wants the disk. \n\n INT. CIA CORRIDOR/GUARD STATION - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN makes his way back down the corridor, toward \n the computer room. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n The blinking cursor is near the edge of the screen and LUTHER\n is sweating. \n\n LUTHER \n He's at the vault - get moving! 1 \n yellow, 2 yellows...Toast! \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN, still hanging upside down, has refused. KRIEGER \n demands again. \n\n INT. CORRIDOR/GUARD STATION - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN passes through the optometric scanner. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n LUTHER \n You're not moving!\n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN is hoisted up. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - DAY \n\n LUTHER \n Phew! (to himself) NOC list. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n ETHAN has the diskette in his mouth. KRIEGER leans down and \n takes it. He drops the knife. \n\n KRIEGER \n Merci. \n\n ETHAN \n We're not outta here yet. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ANTEROOM - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN deactivates the alarm systems, swings the \n door open and comes back into the room. \n\n He turns to close the door behind him and in so doing just \n misses seeing ETHAN'S head as it is pulled back up into the \n ceiling. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n INT. DUCT - DAY \n\n ETHAN throws smoke cannisters and he and KRIEGER crawl \n frantically back through the duct, the way they came. \n\n INT. CIA LANGLEY - LOBBY - DAY \n\n CLAIRE walks quickly past the GUARDS in the reception area \n and out of the building. \n\n INT. CIA - COMPUTER ROOM - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN enters the room and shuts the door. He sees \n the knife, picks it up, looks at it and then puts it down. \n He resumes his work at the computer but when he punches up \n his program, something prints out on his screen. Its header: \n\n KEYSTROKE LOG -- FILE DOWNLOAD \n 11/18/95 9.58 AM\n\n And it goes on. The TECHNICIAN'S eyes widen in disbelief. \n He spins back in his chair and reaches for the nearest \n telephone. \n\n INT. CIA - COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - DAY \n\n In the communications room, tempers are running a little \n high. KITTRIDGE is on his feet, berating his staff. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Think, for Christ's sake, you guys are \n mired in detail, open your minds, it's \n gotta be staring us in the face! What \n does Ethan Hunt want?! \n\n BARNES \n Same thing he wanted in Prague! Same \n thing he's always wanted! The NOC list! \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Okay! \n\n Now it's coming together in KITTRIDGE'S mind and a horrible \n thought occurs to him. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n And where is the list vulnerable? \n\n There is nervous silence for a moment. Behind KITTRIDGE, on \n the other side of the room, the phone starts to ring. \n\n An AGENT gets up to answer it as a creeping fear pervades the \n room. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n (joking) \n Other than here. \n\n Nervous laughter goes around the table. It fades. On the \n other side of the room, the AGENT who answered the phone \n turns, receiver in hand, face ashen. \n\n He holds the phone out to KITTRIDGE, terrified, the bearer of \n extremely bad news. \n\n They all turn slowly and look at him. He holds the phone out \n to KITTRIDGE, shaking slightly. \n\n AGENT \n It's for you. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Kittridge, yup? \n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. VIRGINIA ROAD - DAY \n\n It may be a HUMAN SCREAM or it may be a SIREN'S WAIL but it \n echoes over the forest as a lone fire truck ROARS away from \n the headquarters building, making its escape. \n\n INT. FIRE TRUCK - MOVING - DAY \n\n LUTHER, KRIEGER, CLAIRE and ETHAN, the victorious team, are \n in the truck's cab. They exchange looks of massive relief. \n But no one speaks. LUTHER, in particular, looks heavily \n troubled by what they've just done. \n\n ETHAN looks at CLAIRE, who is jammed into the seat next to \n him. She drops her head on his shoulder, exhausted. \n\n KRIEGER, in the driver's seat literally and figuratively. \n\n ETHAN just looks straight ahead and to CLAIRE. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n INT. COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - DAY \n\n The TECHNICIAN who discovered the theft of the list sits at \n one end of the now-empty conference table in the \n communications room. KITTRIDGE sits in a chair beside, \n staring gravely at him. \n\n He gets up and walks to the door, where HARRY BARNES hovers. \n KITTRIDGE lowers his voice, it's barely audible. \n\n KITTRIDGE (CONT'D) \n (to Barnes) \n You and I know about this -- and that's \n where it stops. Understand? It never happened. \n\n BARNES \n What about him...? \n\n He gestures to the TECHNICIAN, who watches them anxiously. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n I want him manning a radar tower in \n Alaska by the end of the day. Just mail \n him his clothes. \n\n He leaves. Barnes turns to the TECHNICIAN, who looks up at \n him anxiously. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. LONDON - NIGHT \n\n Night. This street is a row of nondescript hotels, one after \n the other, with anonymous names like \"Hotel Pomeroy,\" \"Hotel \n Vincent,\" and \"Hotel Berridge.\" \n\n LONDON \n\n INT. LONDON SAFE HOUSE - NIGHT \n\n This barely furnished flat is as nondescript as the row of \n buildings it's in. ETHAN hurriedly digs through an overnight \n bag until he finds what he's looking for -- the now-battered \n bible he's used to contact Max. He flips through the pages \n and crosses the room to his laptop, which is powered up and \n waiting on the tiny desk. \n\n LUTHER, alone in a chair across the room. is seriously \n preoccupied. KRIEGER is sprawled-on a ratty sofa, hoisting a \n lager and watching CNN. \n\n CLAIRE is at the window staring out, anxious. \n\n KRIEGER glances over the back of the sofa at ETHAN. \n\n KRIEGER \n You contacting your buyer? \n (no answer) \n Ethan? \n\n From the desk, ETHAN glances up. Then goes back to the \n computer. KRIEGER continues to glare over the sofa back. \n\n KRIEGER (CONT'D) \n Ethan? Oh, 'scuse me Mr. Hunt? \n\n ETHAN ignores him, working. His computer jams with static as \n it connects to a BBS. The screen blinks and displays the \n familiar Bible group service through which he's contacted \n Max. When it asks him which chapter and verse for the \n posting, ETHAN flicks through the Bible, looking for the next \n code. He begins to type. \n\n MAX -- Now might be an excellent time \n to interpret Scripture face to face. \n Meet on TGV, noon tomorrow. Take \n seat 27. Bring our mutual friend \n Job.\n\n KRIEGER suddenly appears over his shoulder and knocks bible \n out of Ethan's hands to the floor. \n\n KRIEGER \n You're not going to any meeting without me. \n\n ETHAN \n My contact is extremely shy. \n\n He goes back to the computer, his finger hovering over the \n \"ENTER\" button. \n\n LUTHER and CLAIRE watch this growing conflict closely. ETHAN \n sighs and stands up. KRIEGER pulls out the blue disk he took \n from ETHAN in the computer room and waves it in front of him. \n\n KRIEGER \n I don't think you're in any position to \n give orders, do you? Not while I'm \n holding this. \n\n CLAIRE \n Krieger. \n\n KRIEGER \n Stay out of this. \n OR \n Lachez - moi \n OR \n T'agueue \n\n ETHAN \n Don't you mean this? \n\n He reaches into his briefcase and pulls out an identical \n disk. He puts it back in his jacket pocket. \n\n KRIEGER stares for a second. \n\n KRIEGER\n That's not it. That's not the list. \n\n ETHAN \n What's the matter, you don't know this \n trick? \n\n He holds the jacket pocket wide open, for KRIEGER to look \n into. KRIEGER does. The pocket is empty. \n\n ETHAN (CONT'D) \n (mock surprise) \n Where did it go?! It's GONE! \n\n ETHAN walks over to CLAIRE, reaches into the pocket of the \n trousers she's wearing and pulls out the disk. \n\n ETHAN (CONT'D) \n But not too far! \n\n He palms the disk in his right hand. \n\n ETHAN (CONT'D) \n I know what you're thinking, Krieger. \n You're thinking, back in the computer \n room -- I was up here -- he was down \n there -- . He was carrying two discs. \n\n While he talks, he rotates his hand, palm away from KRIEGER. \n When he rotates it back, the disk is gone again. He holds up \n his left hand. It's there now. \n\n ETHAN (CONT'D) \n So hard to keep track of these things. \n\n ETHAN shows his hands -- now both are empty. \n\n KRIEGER \n (fuming) \n Where is it? \n\n ETHAN pats his pockets, pretending to be frantic. \n\n ETHAN \n I thought you had it! Do you actually \n think I'd let you have the NOC list? \n\n KRIEGER just stares at him, shaken. CLAIRE laughs. KRIEGER \n looks at her. He turns completely red. When he looks back \n at ETHAN, ETHAN holds two disks -- one in each hand. \n\n KRIEGER \n Try any sleight-of-hand with my money and \n Iíll cut your throat. \n\n He tosses his worthless disk into the trash can and storms \n out, SLAMMING the door behind him. ETHAN picks up the Bible \n and sees Drake Hotel. \n\n CLAIRE \n I'm so sorry. Krieger was my call. I've \n never worked with him. I'm sorry, Ethan. \n\n ETHAN \n We did what we had to do. \n\n CLAIRE \n I'm going to try and get some sleep. \n\n She leaves, closing the door behind her, leaving ETHAN and \n LUTHER alone. \n\n ANGLE \n\n ETHAN waits a moment, then casually walks to the trash can, \n picks up the disk KRIEGER threw out and brushes it off \n carefully. \n\n He replaces it, in the trash, with the blue disk from his \n jacket pocket. \n\n LUTHER \n Krieger did have the NOC list. \n\n ETHAN \n Now I want you to hold onto it. \n\n LUTHER \n What makes you trust me? \n\n ETHAN \n Because if you knew what you were getting \n into, you never would have done it. \n\n LUTHER \n I'm not letting this list get out in the \n open. \n\n ETHAN \n Exactly, that's your job. Tomorrow on \n the train, you can't let this list get \n out into the open. What's the range of \n this thing? \n\n LUTHER \n It's hard to tell. I'm gonna have to be \n close. \n\n ETHAN \n I'll get you close. \n\n Claire opens the door. \n\n CLAIRE \n Ethan I need to talk to you. \n\n ETHAN follows CLAIRE into her room where she shows him the \n television screen. \n\n INSERT - SCREEN \n\n On the screen, an anchor in the CNN news center. \n\n ANCHOR \n The unlikely setting...a farm in the \n heartland of America...the State of \n Wisconsin, where federal agents claim to \n have broken the brain trust behind an \n international drug ring. For a report we \n go live now to CNN correspondent (Joe \n Jones) in the state capitol, Madison. \n (Joe)...? \n\n CNN reporter speaks to camera, on the steps of a courthouse. \n\n REPORTER \n Authorities have identified the couple as \n Margaret Ethan Hunt and Donald Hunt. \n\n BACK TO SCENE \n\n ETHAN looks. CLAIRE behind him. \n\n INSERT - SCREEN \n\n An OLDER COUPLE, mid-sixties, exit the doors and are led down \n the steps of the courthouse in shackles. The Reporter and \n other news crews race up to the door. \n\n REPORTER \n Here they are now. \n\n Camera follows the couple downstairs. Police roughly pull \n them away from the news crews. \n\n BACK TO SCENE\n\n INSERT - SCREEN \n\n REPORTER \n They were apprehended this morning by the \n DEA in a major sting operation for the \n illegal manufacture of the drug \n methcathinone, known on the street as \n \"cat\". \n\n BACK TO SCENE \n\n ETHAN \n\n INSERT - SCREEN \n\n VOICE (O.S.) \n Similar to methamphetamines, cat is seen \n by officials as one of the most powerful \n and dangerous drugs in the world. Some \n thirty-four cat labs have been seized so \n far, but the recently widowed Mrs. Hunt \n and her brother-in-law are believed to be \n involved in a global drug distribution \n network. \n\n A public official exits the building. The reporter and other \n news crews charge up to him. \n\n REPORTER \n Mr. Fairchild, agent Fairchild, a comment \n please. \n\n The image on the television changes to an interview with a \n PUBLIC OFFICIAL who faces a bank of microphones. \n\n PUBLIC OFFICIAL \n I think it's sad, really. Farmers, \n unless they're a conglomerate, are always \n operating on a paper-thin margin. I'm \n afraid what we have here is a case of a \n naive and lonely widow with a lot of \n financial problems who chose to make \n money through illegal means. \n\n REPORTER \n That was John Fairchild, the DEA agent in \n charge of this investigation. Officials \n tell me that international law \n enforcement agents are expected to arrive \n here later today to question the Hunts. \n This is Joe Jones, CNN, Love in Madison, \n Wisconsin. \n\n BACK TO SCENE \n\n ETHAN \n Kittridge... \n\n CLAIRE \n Bastard! \n\n ETHAN switches TV off and paces away from it. His anger \n erupts and he kicks the old filing cabinets, then picks up a \n chair and throws it across the room so it smashes into the \n wall. CLAIRE tries to get hold of him, but he shakes her \n away. \n\n ETHAN \n Don't...don't touch me... \n\n CAMERA SWING PANS between them. \n\n CLAIRE \n What are you going to do? \n\n ETHAN \n (turns to her and gestures at TV) \n He's expecting my call. \n (strides to door) \n I'm going to the station... \n (o/s at door) \n And I'm going to call him. \n\n EXT. LONDON SAFE HOUSE - RAIN - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN comes out from a side street by Liverpool Street \n Underground Station and crosses the road to the main station. \n CLAIRE watches him from the window. \n\n INT. LONDON TERMINUS RAILWAY STATION - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN hurries down escalator. CAMERA MOVES IN on him. He \n crosses to the TELEPHONE BOXES. He starts to dial a number. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n INT. CIA - COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - NIGHT \n\n A light flashes and a phone BUZZES. KITTRIDGE in shirt and \n tie, picks up. BARNES and several other AGENTS are \n monitoring newscasts and engaged in various activities \n related to the Hunt case. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n (picking up) \n Kittridge. \n\n ETHAN (O.S.) \n I see you've been out visiting the folks. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n (covers receiver) \n It's Hunt. What do you need for a \n pinpoint? \n (to Ethan) \n Been watching a little T.V., have you? \n\n One of the technicians frantically scratches something on a \n piece of foolscap and waves it at KITTRIDGE: \"80 SECONDS\". \n\n KITTRIDGE nods. \n\n EXT. PHONE BOX - LONDON - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN\n Hauling Mom off to jail in shackles was \n an especially nice touch. \n\n INT. CIA - COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - NIGHT \n\n At the console, the number 44 flashes on the TECHNICIAN'S \n screen. \n\n TECHNICIAN \n He's in England. \n\n BARNES scratches England and 22 seconds on foolscap and waves \n it. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n (covering receiver) \n Get MI5. \n\n The TECHNICIAN opens another line on his console and begins \n patching through to Whitehall. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Ethan, I want to reassure you that my \n first order of business after you come in \n is to get these ridiculous charges \n against your family dropped and \n eliminated completely from their files. \n Come in now, we can plea down the charges \n against you as well. \n\n The wall clock is thirty seconds and counting down. The \n TECHNICIAN is frantically signalling KITTRIDGE to keep \n talking. KITTRIDGE is momentarily stuck. Fortunately: \n\n ETHAN (O.S.) \n Can I ask you something, Kittridge? \n \n KITTRIDGE \n Certainly Ethan. \n\n INT. PHONE BOX - LONDON - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN \n If you're dealing with someone who's \n crushed, stabbed, shot and detonated five \n members of his own IMF team, how \n devastated do you think you're going to \n make him by marching Ma and Uncle Donald \n down to the county courthouse? \n\n INT. CIA - COMMUNICATIONS ROOM - NIGHT \n\n KITTRIDGE \n I don't know, Ethan. Suppose you tell me? \n\n Click. ETHAN has hung up. KITTRIDGE looks hopefully to the \n TECHNICIAN who says: \n\n BARNES \n Lost him. We needed three more seconds. \n\n Surprisingly KITTRIDGE is not as upset as he is puzzled. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n He wanted us to know he was in London. \n\n Clearly that's the question that KITTRIDGE is turning over in \n his mind and he doesn't have a simple answer to it. \n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. PHONE BOX - LONDON - NIGHT \n\n Close Digital clock. It reads 23.59. Angle widens to show \n ETHAN looking at it with grim satisfaction. He opens the \n door of the phone booth and almost SMACKS right into -- \n\n --the pale, weary, ghostlike figure of a man standing just \n inches in front of him. Startled, ETHAN looks up, but what \n he sees shakes him to the core. \n\n The man is JIM PHELPS. \n\n ETHAN SHOUTS and almost falls back into the phone booth. \n PHELPS leans against the door of the booth and smiles weakly. \n\n PHELPS \n You're a hard man to catch up with. \n \n PHELPS falls towards ETHAN. ETHAN tries to speak, but can't \n even form words. \n\n INT - RAILWAY STATION CAFE (DAY) \n\n ETHAN and PHELPS opposite one another in a booth, PHELPS \n looking clammy and listing to one side. But the banter \n seems friendly and very quick - two friends and close \n colleagues able to follow one another's reasoning easily, \n finishing each other's sentences: \n\n PHELPS\n ..the next day I managed to drag myself \n to the safe house, must've just missed \n you..anyway, I checked our aliases.\n\n ETHAN\n - and picked us up in the States -\n\n PHELPS \n - but you left before I could get there \n and I could check just so many places.. \n\n ETHAN \n Yeah, smaller countries don't computerize \n customs records - \n\n PHELPS \n - so I watched Europe. Once you showed \n up in England..it was easy. \n\n ETHAN \n You knew I liked the rentals at Liverpool \n Street. \n\n PHELPS \n Hey, I showed 'em to you! \n\n ETHAN \n I remember.. \n\n PHELPS smiles warmly, has to steady himself to maintain an \n upright position. He opens a medicine bottle and takes the \n pain killers. \n\n ETHAN \n Jim, who do you think you're kidding? A \n doctor's gotta look at that. You can't \n sit up straight. \n\n PHELPS \n I can sit up straight. I just can't..sit \n up straight very well. It's not \n important! I saw who shot me. Ethan, I \n saw the mole. It was Kittridge. \n (a fist into the table) \n Kittridge! \n\n PHELPS grips the sides of the table. \n\n ETHAN \n Kitteridge. Oh my god! Kittridge is the \n mole? \n\n PHELPS \n Yeah. \n\n ETHAN \n How did Kittridge do it?.. \n\n EXT. CHARLES BRIDGE - FLASHBACK - NIGHT \n\n A reprise of PHELPS'S narrative only now ETHAN'S telling it \n and camera is showing the events as ETHAN sees they actually \n happened. \n\n ETHAN VO \n - first he took care of Jack in the \n elevator - \n \n At the Embassy PHELPS sends the elevator to the top of the \n building, watching it go and crush Kiefer. \n\n ETHAN VO \n - he shot you on the bridge - \n\n On the Charles bridge PHELPS using the Visco glasses aims the \n gun toward them, fires, cants the glasses and tosses them \n into the Vltava River. \n\n ETHAN VO \n - he must have had back up take out \n Golitsyn and Sarah at the fence.. \n\n There on the embankment, in the night and fog, it is KRIEGER \n who takes out GOLITSYN and SARAH thru the fence.. \n\n ETHAN VO \n How did he do Hannah? \n\n Here it is CLAIRE with back to camera who presses the \n detonator and turns dreamily to face it, the explosion \n brilliant behind her... \n\n ETHAN VO \n No. No. He could've taken out Hannah \n himself. \n\n PHELPS presses the remote detonator and the car blows.. \n\n OVER SHOULDER - PHELPS (INT. RAILWAY CAFE)\n\n ETHAN looking intently at him.\n\n ETHAN\n Why, Jim? Why?\n\n Awkward moment.\n\n PHELPS\n ..when you think about it, Ethan, it was\n inevitable..no more Cold War. No more\n secrets you keep from everyone but\n yourself, operations you answer to no one\n but yourself. Then one morning you wake\n up and find out the President of the\n United States is running the country -\n without your permission. The son-of-a-\n bitch! How dare he? You realize itís\n over, youíre an obsolete piece of\n hardware not worth upgrading, youíve got\n a lousy marriage and sixty-two grand a \n year. Kittridge, weíll go after that no\n good son-of-a-bitch, big time!\n\n ETHAN\n We donít have to, Jim. Heíll come after\n us.\n\n PHELPS\n Whatís going to make him do that?\n\n ETHAN\n What he didnít get in Prague. The NOC\n list.\n\n PHELPS\n Jesus, Ethan. Good for you.\n\n ETHAN\n A meeting tomorrow on the TGV, enroute to\n Paris.\n\n PHELPS\n Tight security. No guns. Real plus.\n\n ETHAN\n If I supposedly deliver the NOC list to\n Max, Max has agreed to deliver Job to me.\n Iíll have Claire and Luther Stickell with\n me on the train. Marcel Krieger will\n have helicopter transport waiting in\n Paris.\n\n PHELPS looks away. Seems badly shaken.\n\n ETHAN\n Jim...?\n\n PHELPS\n I was sitting in a cafe waiting for you\n and suddenly there she was, standing in\n the rain just outside the safe\n house..alive and beautiful..and thinking\n Iím dead and gone. God knows what sheís\n had to do forget about me to keep going\n and get the job done, I..\n\n PHELPS breaks off abruptly. Apparently some inner struggle\n over this threatens to overwhelm him. Then, controlling it:\n\n PHELPS\n - no. She canít know about me. No one\n can. Not til this is over. Thereís too\n much at stake, Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n Youíre probably right.\n\n PHELPS\n I usually am.\n\n ETHAN\n Once we leave the safehouse, get in there\n and crash. Iíll call you from Paris.\n\n PHELPS\n You got it.\n\n ETHAN\n And get a doctor.\n\n PHELPS\n Good luck.\n\n INT. LONDON SAFE HOUSE - CLAIREíS ROOM - NIGHT\n\n The door to CLAIRE'S room in the safe house opens, throwing a\n shaft of light over her form. ETHAN creeps in and closes the\n door behind him.\n\n It is approximately one a.m. . CLAIRE is huddled in the\n corner. ETHAN enters and stands looking at her.\n\n CLAIRE\n What happened?\n\n ETHAN\n (walks towards her)\n I sent the message to Max. Weíre on for\n tomorrow.\n\n CLAIRE\n Okay...\n\n ETHAN \n (he steps towards her, stops)\n Is this the only way?\n\n CLAIRE\n Yes.......come here....viens pres moi...\n\n She draws him down by his hand to kiss her.\n\n He kisses her again, more fully. She wraps an arm around him\n and he holds onto the kiss. The room appears to revolve\n around them.\n\n CUT TO:\n\n EXT. PRIVATE HELIPAD - DAY\n\n Suddenly itís bright, broad daylight, so bright it hurts our\n eyes.\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES step off a military helicopter, blinking\n at the sunlight and hurry down the steps.\n\n TWO AGENTS immediately flank KITTRIDGE at the bottom and fall\n into step alongside, ready to brief him. One of them holds\n out a small package with \"for Job\" written on it.\n\n KITTRIDGE looks at him. He rips it open. A note inside\n simply says:\n\n TGV. LONDON TERMINUS\n Noon.\n\n KITTRIDGE looks at his watch. Itís ten to twelve.\n\n As he reads the note, something else falls out of the\n envelope and CLUNKS to the ground.\n\n He bends over, picks it up, and looks at it. Cradled in his\n hand, we canít see what it is. But to him, itís very\n interesting.\n\n He steps up his pace, headed for the car.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n (to the Agent) \n How long to the London Terminus?\n\n AGENT\n Twenty, twenty-five minutes.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Youíve got ten. Move!\n\n INT. WATERLOO STATION PLATFORM - DAY\n\n The sleek front power car, looking like the nose of an SST,\n gets its 25,000 volt charge from the overhead catenary.\n\n The rear power car gets its jolt.\n\n The TGV starts to move, pulling out of the station.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n The business car is similar to the one ETHAN saw on the first\n train they look across Europe. Itís crowded, maybe THIRTY\n MEN and WOMEN in suits, most of them already immersed in work\n on their laptops or talking on their cellular phones.\n\n One such woman is MAX in her seat, number 27. MATTHIAS and\n the OTHER MAN, last seen dropping off ETHAN in Prague, sit\n across from her, her laptop is on the table next to her, in\n her briefcase.\n\n MAX\n How long until we reach the Chunnel?\n\n MATTHIAS\n Twenty minutes.\n\n INT. REAR CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n A MAN puts a cellular phone and a radio/cassette machine on\n the bunk-bed. We only see his hands as he proceeds to take\n the parts of a pistol out of the cassette machine and\n assemble a wicked-looking pistol from the seemingly innocuous\n electrical parts inside.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n MAX is reading the Financial Times. MATTHIAS is looking out\n of the window. A cellular phone rings inside MAXís briefcase\n in front of MATTHIAS. MATTHIAS takes the phone out.\n\n MATTHIAS\n Yes...\n (holds phone out for Max)\n Itís him.\n\n MAX\n (into phone) \n This wasnít what we discussed.\n\n ETHAN (O.S.)\n (on phone) \n My apologies Max. Couldnít be helped.\n Thereís a piece of black cloth under your\n seat. Tear it away and youíll find the\n disk.\n\n MAX reaches down and does as instructed, finding the computer\n disk as promised. She hands it to Matthias who strips off\n the velcro covering and slots it into the drive next to the\n computer in the briefcase. He boots it up quickly and turns\n the briefcase containing the computer toward MAX for her to\n see.\n\n One half of the screen, with the heading \"CRYPTONYM AND\n OPERATIONAL SPECS\" is already jammed with information. The\n blank second half of the screen acquires the title \"TRUE\n NAME,\" and information starts filling itself in rapidly --\n names, addresses, identities.\n\n As the two sides match up, a legend flashes:\n\n IDENTITY MATCH\n\n MAX\n (back into phone) \n Ha, dear boy! I do hope this doesnít\n prelude a meeting in private.\n\n ETHAN (O.S.)\n It doesnít, dear girl. as long as you\n tell me where the money is.\n\n MAX\n The possibility alone is worth ten\n million. Baggage car, rack 3. Silver\n briefcase. Combination 314.\n\n ETHAN (O.S.)\n What about Job?\n\n MAX\n I wouldnít worry about him. Once youíve\n got the money -- heíll find you.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING (ANOTHER ANGLE)\n\n LUTHER, three rows behind in another seat, is at work on a\n laptop of his own. A mobile Nokia phone is beside it - red\n light flashing.\n\n INT. SECOND CLASS CAR - MOVING (ANOTHER ANGLE) - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES move through the second class car. They\n turn around and start working their way back again.\n\n At the front, CLAIRE is getting desperate. A LARGE MAN\n passes through the door behind her.\n\n The LARGE MAN continues back, nearing KITTRIDGE and BARNES,\n who are forced to step into empty seats on the side in order\n to make room for him to pass. As they move by him, their\n vision is momentarily blocked --\n\n -- and CLAIRE gets up to follow.\n\n She follows to the rear of the car and she passes through the\n door and out of the car, after KITTRIDGE and BARNES talk in\n doorway.\n\n BARNES\n Only four more cars.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n And if we donít find him - weíll search\n the whole train again.\n\n BARNES\n Whatís Hunt doing on the TGV?\n\n KITTRIDGE\n High speed train. No-one gets on. No-\n one gets off. High security. Good place\n for a pass off to Max.\n\n BARNES\n But why tell us?\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Heís putting on a show, Barnes.\n\n BARNES\n What kind of show.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n I donít know.\n (looks at his wrist monitor)\n It didnít say on the tickets.\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES go off back through the next coach.\n CLAIRE follows into the same doorway and stops to speak into\n her wristwatch to ETHAN:\n\n CLAIRE\n Ethan...Kittridge is on the train.\n\n ETHAN\n Kittridge is Job. Max delivered. How\n far is he from Luther?\n\n CLAIRE\n Two cars. Where are you?\n\n ETHAN\n You are my eyes. Stay with him.\n\n She moves onto the next coach, going after KITTRIDGE and\n BARNES.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - (MAX) - DAY\n\n On her computer screen in the business car, an ominous\n message flashes.\n\n LIST COMPLETE\n\n MAX dials a number on her cellular phone. She is calling Job.\n\n MAX\n (into phone)\n Heís in the baggage car.\n\n PHELPS (O/S)\n (assembling gun in sleeping\n compartment)\n Iíll be there.\n\n MAX hangs up and hands the phone to MATTHIAS who slots it\n into the briefcase next to the computer. He dials a number\n on the keyboard and pushes send. The computer emits a DIAL\n TONE. Her computer flashes a message.\n\n MODEM DENIED\n\n MAX\n Whatís the problem.\n\n MATTHIAS\n Connection denied.\n\n MAX\n Try it again.\n\n MATTHIAS\n Itís not working.\n\n MAX\n Is something wrong with the phone?\n (Pause as he tries the phone)\n Well is something wrong with the\n batteries?\n\n MATTHIAS\n I always check the batteries.\n\n MAX\n Run it through from the top.\n\n INT. REAR CAR (SLEEPING COMPARTMENT) - MOVING - DAY\n\n The MAN assembling the gun CLICKS the last piece, the\n silencer, into place.\n\n INT. CAR (NEXT TO MAXíS CAR) - MOVING - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES looking - stop in doorway.\n\n BARNES\n Nothing but civilians, Gene.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n This is bullshit - we donít even know\n what Max looks like.\n\n BARNES\n Maybe we donít have to know what he looks\n like. If heís got that list, heís going\n to want to check it. We should be\n looking for laptops.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Good idea.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - (LUTHER) - MOVING - DAY\n\n LUTHER sees them coming. He smacks the laptop shut and\n positions his jamming phone on the table to point at Maxís\n computer. He gets up, taking his computer with him, headed\n for the rear of the car. A WAITER sees the phone and goes\n after LUTHER with it.\n\n WAITER\n Excuse me, Sir, your telephone...\n\n OTHER PASSENGERSí phones nearby go haywire. LUTHER looks to\n MAX. Exits car.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - (MAX) - DAY\n\n Her dial tone finally hits the static of a computer\n connection and the message on her screen changes:\n\n TRANSFER IN PROGRESS\n\n MATTHIAS\n Itís working.\n\n MAX\n Phew! Weíve got five minutes...\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n LUTHER shuts himself in the bathroom. The OTHER MAN follows\n him, tries the door and waits his moment. The OTHER MAN\n bangs against the door. LUTHER braces himself against the\n door.\n\n INT. ANOTHER CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n CLAIRE walking through. She pauses to listen in her\n earpiece.\n\n ETHAN (O/S)\n Iíve got the money. Meet me in the\n baggage car.\n\n She walks on.\n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES are looking at the people in the\n Business Car behind MAX. CLAIRE passes them by heading for\n the last executive coach to get to Club and Baggage Car. She\n passes the OTHER MAN at the bathroom door. He follows her.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Get this door open.\n\n KITTRIDGE and BARNES have seen CLAIRE go through MAXíS\n Business Car and past the OTHER MAN at the bathroom door.\n They follow, but suspect the locked bathroom door and stop\n there to listen.\n\n INT. LAST EXECUTIVE CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n CLAIRE moves swiftly through the last car (after MAXíS car).\n up into the Club Car and opens the door leading to the\n BAGGAGE CAR. Goes in. The door slams shut.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Hello, Luther. Whereís Hunt?\n\n LUTHER\n Mr. Kittridge, the NOC list is being\n modemed off the train.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Where?\n\n INT. REAR CAR - MOVING - DAY\n\n CLAIRE enters a little breathless. Spotting PHELPíS profile\n in the darkened car.\n\n CLAIRE\n Ethanís right behind me. Listen to me\n Jim. Is it such a good idea to kill him?\n We take the money. Ethan takes the\n blame. No-one else has seen you alive.\n No-one will believe him.\n\n ETHAN\n Of course - Iím sorry to hear you say\n that Claire.\n\n CLAIRE\n Ethan?\n\n PHELPS\n Yes. Ethan Hunt, darling. Remember him?\n\n Here PHELPS pulls out his assembled pistol.\n\n CLAIRE\n You knew about Jim?\n\n PHELPS\n Course he did. Just exactly when he knew\n is something of a question. Before or\n after I showed in London, mind telling\n me, Ethan?\n\n ETHAN\n Before London. But after you took the\n Bible out of the Drake Hotel in Chicago.\n\n PHELPS\n They stamped it, didnít they? Those damn\n Gideons.\n\n PHELPíS watch alarm goes off.\n\n PHELPS\n Two minutes til Krieger shows. Thisíll\n have to be quicker than Iíd like.\n Certainly quicker than youíd like.\n\n CLAIRE\n Ethan, if you knew about Jim?..Why..\n\n PHELPS\n Why the masquerade? Why take the risk?\n Well, Claire, youíve asked the question\n and you are the answer.\n\n ETHAN\n I knew about Jim.\n\n PHELPS\n But, he didnít know about you. In all\n fairness, Ethan, Claire was never\n convinced her charms would work with you.\n But I was supremely confident - having\n tastes the goods. \"Thou shall not covet\n thy Neighbourís wife\", Ethan. Oh, Ethan\n is in love with you, Claire, make no\n mistake about it. And like all the \n worldís lovers, heís tortured by the\n same, one pathetic question - \"does she\n feel the same way I do?\"\n\n JIM turns to CLAIRE.\n\n PHELPS\n Well Claire do you? Have you been\n exploiting his feelings or returning\n them?\n\n CLAIRE\n Jim - lets just get the money and get out\n of here.\n\n CLAIRE goes to ETHAN.\n\n CLAIRE (CONT'D)\n The money Ethan.\n\n ETHAN hands her the money.\n\n ETHAN\n Youíve earned it.\n\n CLAIRE goes to Jim with the money.\n\n PHELPS\n Count it.\n\n CLAIRE starts to count.\n\n ETHAN\n Tell me something Claire, that night in\n Prague, was it you or Jim that blew up\n the car and scattered Hannah all over\n town?\n\n PHELPS\n Keep counting Claire.\n\n CLAIRE\n It was me. I did it.\n\n CLAIRE hands PHELPS the money.\n\n\n PHELPS\n Satisfied?\n\n CLAIRE\n All ten million.\n\n PHELPS\n Fold it. Fold it tight.\n\n ETHAN\n Arenít you going to thank me Jim. Ten\n million is better than six.\n\n PHELPS\n Donít flatter yourself - six was for\n Eastern Europe. You made a lousy deal -\n ten for the world? What is that? But I\n needed you for the transfer with Max. I\n got a little extra change; and you got a\n little extra too.\n\n PHELPíS watch alarm goes off.\n\n PHELPS\n Sorry Ethan. Times up. Say goodbye.\n\n ETHAN\n Youíre wrong about one thing. Iím not\n the only one whoís seen you alive.\n\n ETHAN throws JIM the Visco glasses.\n\n KITTRIDGE\n Good morning, Mr Phelps.\n\n PHELPS and CLAIRE are stunned.\n\n PHELPS\n You son of a bitch.\n\n PHELPS points the gun at ETHAN.\n\n CLAIRE\n Donít Jim.\n\n PHELPS\n Now we donít have to eliminate him? You\n like that, donít you Claire? Donít you?\n\n CLAIRE\n Yes.\n\n ETHAN\n Jim, itís over.\n\n PHELPS\n Ethan - Iíve always taught you, nothing\n can be more dangerous than the truth. It\n can kill you.\n\n PHELPS shoots CLAIRE. Struggle between PHELPS and ETHAN.\n The gun is lost. PHELPS beats ETHAN to the ground. His\n watch alarm beeps rapidly. He turns, goes up the stairs\n and...\n\n ETHAN goes to CLAIRE.\n \n ETHAN\n Claire...Hey...\n\n CLAIRE\n This stuff is so sticky.\n\n ETHAN\n Claire.\n\n CLAIRE\n Itís all right, Ethan..youíll bring me\n back...wonít you...\n\n ETHAN \n I always have, Claire.. \n\n CLAIRE dies. ETHAN looks to ladder hatch and climbs ladder. \n\n INT. REAR CAR - ENGINEER'S SECTION - DAY\n\n PHELPS climbs up a ladder past an inert engineer slumped over \n the control panel -- an obvious earlier victim of PHELPS. \n PHELPS puts on a pair of clear goggles, reaches a trap door \n and climbs through it -- \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN - DAY\n\n -- halfway out onto the roof of the train. He reaches into \n his jacket pocket and pulls out a suction cup with a handle \n on the end of it. He SMACKS the suction cup down on the roof \n and pulls himself the rest of the way out. \n\n He pulls out a second suction cup and SMACKS it down on the \n smooth surface of the train. \n\n Now for the tough part. Using the suction cups, PHELPS \n slowly pulls himself forward, a foot at a time, pulling and \n replanting the cups as he goes. \n\n He drags himself over the length of the final car, to the \n back of the train, where the rear engine slants off sharply, \n a window for the ENGINEER. \n\n Half kneeling on the roof, PHELPS pulls out the clip from his \n belt.\n\n He looks up, scanning the sky behind the train. From out \n of the fog, a helicopter approaches. \n\n PHELPS turns and looks ahead, in the direction the train is \n going. In the distance, he can see the chunnel approaching \n the tunnel under the English Channel. His eyes widen. \n\n INT. HELICOPTER - DAY\n\n KRIEGER is at the controls. He sees the approaching tunnel \n as well. \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN - DAY\n\n PHELPS crawls like hell to get into position. Looking up, he \n sees KRIEGER pointing frantically behind him. PHELPS turns. \n\n ETHAN is climbing out the trap door. \n\n A cable and hook swing down from the helicopter, almost \n touching the roof of the train. PHELPS crawls closer to it. \n\n ETHAN, behind him, is in a far more precarious position. \n Without goggles or suction cups, he has to use his fingers to \n grab small holes on the roof. \n\n He is flipped over by the wind, ending up facing the other \n way. Loses his grip and is blown backwards over the roof. \n\n INT. HELICOPTER - DAY\n\n KRIEGER sees the Chunnel entrance approaching. He gestures \n to PHELPS and tries to move the cable closer to him, passing \n over PHELPS and then back to him. \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN - DAY\n\n PHELPS grabs the cable and is about to hook the cable onto \n his belt, ETHAN slides into him and they both crash onto the \n roof. \n\n ETHAN grabs the cable out of PHELPS hand and clips it onto \n the roof. \n\n PHELPS and ETHAN struggle, but they are hurtling dangerously \n closer to the chunnel entrance. \n\n They're now right on top of the chunnel entrance. \n\n INT. HELICOPTER - DAY\n\n KRIEGER sees the tunnel, only seconds away now. He paws at \n the controls, jerking back desperately on a certain lever. \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN - DAY\n\n PHELPS kicks ETHAN and he falls off the far side of the \n train. PHELPS falls off the near side and holding onto the \n strap manages to pull himself back on. \n\n -- The train ZOOMS into the tunnel -- \n\n -- AND THE HELICOPTER ROARS RIGHT IN BEHIND IT! \n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR/TUNNEL - MOVING - DAY\n\n As the train roars into the tunnel, the business car goes \n nearly dark and the message on MAX'S computer screen changes \n one last time. This time it says: \n\n CONNECTION TERMINATED. \n TRANSFER LOST.\n\n MAX'S face falls. \n\n MAX\n Damn!\n\n INT. REAR CAR/ENGINEER'S SECTION - DAY\n\n Another CONDUCTOR races into the power car, past his inert \n companion, and is shocked to see the copter right behind the \n train. He grabs a radio and SCREAMS into it. \n\n CONDUCTOR \n No, no, it's IN the tunnel! \n\n VOICE (O.S.) \n Stop the train! \n\n CONDUCTOR \n It'll crash into us! Accelerate, \n accelerate. \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN/TUNNEL - DAY\n\n For a moment, we see no one. No ETHAN. No PHELPS. Moving \n around to the other end of the car, we see where they've \n gone. \n\n They're dangling from either side of it. \n\n PHELPS paws for one of the suction cups and pulls himself \n back onto the roof of the train. ETHAN reaches for the other \n cup. \n\n The helicopter, fortunate that this tunnel is double track \n and barely wide enough to accomodate it, pursues, KRIEGER \n pushing it up to full speed again. \n\n But it can't lift up high enough to go completely over the \n train. \n\n EXT. ROOF OF TRAIN/TUNNEL - DAY\n\n PHELPS, nearing the back, manoeuvers himself to the \n windshield of the rear power car, trying to grab the skid of \n KRIEGER'S copter. \n\n He doesn't see what's headed toward him, coming from the \n other direction. \n\n Another train. \n\n At the last moment, PHELPS notices the reflection of the \n oncoming train in the windshield and swings back onto the \n roof of his train, barely avoiding getting creamed by it as \n it blows by. \n\n The helicopter avoids the oncoming train too -- and PHELPS \n misses the skid. \n\n KRIEGER tips the front of the copter, trying to decapitate \n ETHAN with the rotor. PHELPS jumps onto the skid, but the \n copter pitches so far forward the blade hits the top of the \n tunnel. SPARKS and chunks of cement fly. \n\n KRIEGER levels the chopper quickly. ETHAN uses the moment to \n leap from the train onto the other helicopter skid. \n\n PHELPS and ETHAN now hang on the skids, facing one another. \n Crouching on the skid, ETHAN digs in his pocket and pulls \n out -- \n\n -- a red and green piece of bubble gum. \n\n PHELPS sees it and SCREAMS at KRIEGER, who scrambles \n frantically for his gun. \n\n ETHAN \n Red light, green light. Asta Lasagna \n mother fucker. \n\n ETHAN mashes the red into the green, slaps the gum onto the \n copter's underbelly and turns away from it. \n\n PHELPS kicks vainly at the gum, SCREAMING -- \n\n -- but the gum EXPLODES. The force of the blast rockets \n ETHAN forward, he lands on the train's windshield. \n\n The helicopter whirls and BASHES into the tunnel, veers \n wildly, then pitches forward and down, smashing PHELPS under \n the skid and EXPLODING in a giant fireball. \n\n ETHAN, stuck on the windshield, can only watch as the \n wreckage of the copter tumbles down the train towards him. \n It stops just short of him, with its bent and broken rotor \n blade barely missing his throat. \n\n ETHAN lays his head against the windshield glass, utterly \n drained. \n\n INT. BUSINESS CAR/TUNNEL - MOVING - DAY\n\n KITTRIDGE comes back into the business car and is joined by \n BARNES. LUTHER, only slightly bruised, stands up next to \n them and gestures to MAX and her laptop. \n\n LUTHER\n I think this is what you're looking for. \n\n MAX looks up, stunned. KITTRIDGE leans over and peers at her \n screen. He just smiles and sits down next to her, content to \n wait for her to speak. \n\n When she finally does, she's almost charming. \n\n MAX \n My lawyers will have a field day with \n this. Entrapment, jurisdictional \n conflicts -- \n\n KITTRIDGE leans closer to her and lowers his voice, just as \n friendly. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n Maybe we'll just keep the courts out of \n this one. \n\n MAX \n I'm sure we can find something I have \n that you need. \n\n KITTRIDGE \n You know, I would love to try. \n\n EXT. LONDON PUB - DAY\n\n LUTHER sits on a high stool, his PowerBook next to him, while \n he sips a beer. A television screen is featuring follow-up \n coverage of yesterday's dramatic helicopter-train wreck in \n the chunnel. Aside from emphasizing that it was the work of \n a lone, crazed character in a helicopter who was killed in \n the crash, there are comments about how miraculous it was \n there were no other fatalaties. There are intermittent \n sounds of aircraft taking off and landing, announcements of \n arrivals and departures. ETHAN into shot. He sits beside \n LUTHER. \n\n LUTHER \n Reach your folks? \n (ETHAN nods) \n How they feeling? \n\n ETHAN\n About what? \n\n LUTHER \n The official apology from the Justice \n Department, the VIP treatment, you know, \n the whole nine yards. \n\n ETHAN \n Well my Mother was a little confused \n about how the DEA could mistake her and \n Uncle Donald for a couple of dope smugglers \n in the Florida keys. \n\n LUTHER picks up his beer. \n\n LUTHER\n (Laughs and with a British accent) \n Cheers. \n\n They drink. \n\n ETHAN\n Here's to you, Luther. (clink glasses) To \n being off the disavowed list. \n\n LUTHER \n Hey, I'm the flavour of the month! \n\n ETHAN\n You're more than that, Luther. They were \n mistaken about you and they're trying to \n show you they know it. They want you \n back in. \n\n LUTHER\n Sure. They want me back in so I won't \n break in! They still can't figure out \n how we did it. \n\n ETHAN \n You didn't tell 'em at the debriefing? \n\n LUTHER \n I figured I'd let 'em reinstate my back \n pay, give me a promotion, check out my \n office at Langley and then, maybe, talk \n about it. \n\n ETHAN \n (laughing) \n It's all one big negotiation, isn't it? \n\n LUTHER \n Why don't you come back with me? \n\n ETHAN \n Just don't know why I'd be doing it. \n\n LUTHER \n You really liked Phelps, didn't you? \n\n ETHAN \n He was a good guy for a long, long time. \n Just - not long enough. (looks up) Gotta \n catch my flight..(rising) \n So. How's it feel being a solid citizen \n again? \n\n LUTHER \n Oh man...I don't know. I'm gonna miss \n being disreputable. \n\n ETHAN \n Well, Luther - if it makes you feel any \n better I'll always think of you that way. \n\n The two men understand one another and LUTHER will say no \n more. The two exchange slight gestures of farewell and in a \n moment ETHAN disappears from the bar, leaving a contemplative \n LUTHER looking after him. \n\n INT. PLANE - NIGHT \n\n ETHAN HUNT slumps down in his scat, dosing. A FLIGHT \n ATTENDANT makes her way down the aisle, holding a case filled \n with movie cassettes. She stops before a lady passenger. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Would you like to watch a movie, Miss \n Clarke? \n\n She then stops before ETHAN. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Excuse me, Mr. Hunt. Would you like to\n watch a movie.\n\n ETHAN\n No, thank you.\n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Would you consider the cinema of the \n Caribbean? \n\n ETHAN just stares at her. This couldn't be what it's \n sounding like. \n\n FLIGHT ATTENDANT \n Aruba, perhaps? \n\n The camera moves into ETHAN's face. They found him. They \n want him back. He looks up at her and..... \n\n CUT TO BLACK \n\n\n THE END \n\n\n\n "
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https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/mission-impossible_shoot.html
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mission Impossible II' ?"
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{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "\n\n\n\n\n\n MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 2\n\n\n By\n\n Robert Towne\n\n\n\n\n\n Revised. 12/4/99\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n NOTE: THE HARD COPY OF THIS SCRIPT CONTAINED SCENE NUMBERS\n AND SOME \"SCENE OMITTED\" SLUGS. THEY HAVE BEEN REMOVED FOR\n THIS SOFT COPY.\n\n\n\n\n FADE IN:\n\n A WORN SATCHEL (MOVING - DAY)\n \n is being carried by a world weary middle European wearing a black \n armband. VLADIMIR NEKHORVICH exits a gleaming building, pausing \n for a moment, under a motto clearly visible above his head, \n 'Where the future is now'. He checks the time.\n\n INSERT - WATCH\n\n set in Countdown Mode. It's at 19 hours forty-seven minutes and \n sixteen seconds and dropping, 19:37.15, :14, :13, :12 etc.\n\n O.S. children are singing:\n\n Ring a ring a rosy/a pocketful of posy/\n a tissue a tissue/we all fall down.\n\n Nekhorvich looks to see children at play outside the adjacent \n Natural History Museum. They are moving in and around an odd\n freeform sculpture.\n\n POV - SCULPTURE AND CHILDREN\n\n a blur where the sculpture seems to be distorting the children, \n almost like mirrors in a fun house.\n\n NEKHORVICH \n\n wipes his eyes, a horn honks. He looks toward the sound.\n\n MOVING SHOT - SATCHEL (INT. AIRPORT SECURITY - DAY)\n\n on the belt that takes it thru X-Ray. On the other side a guard \n opens the satchel and pokes thru a few toilet articles, personal \n items, books, a battleship gray digital camera and - in a small \n plastic container marked 'S.G.' - a small, square shiny object, \n hi-tech and at odds with the other items. She pulls out an urn-\n shaped vessel.\n\n GUARD\n What's this, then?\n\n NEKHORVICH \n (handing her documents)\n The ashes of a colleague, I'm taking them\n to his family. If you wish to open it,\n please be careful.\n\n COMPUTERIZED SCREEN DISPLAY (INT. PLANE - MOVING - DAY)\n\n on the cabin wall displays a colorful map showing the flight \n point of departure in Sydney, continuously updating distance, \n direction and time to its ultimate destination, Atlanta, Georgia.\n\n CAPTAIN'S VOICE\n - folks, we're a little over two and a \n half hours from touchdown in Atlanta, but \n if you look out your windows on either \n side of the aircraft, we'll soon be \n crossing the southern section of the Rocky \n Mountains, a range which includes more \n than 50 peaks rising above 14,000 feet. \n The chain's loftiest point, Mount Elbert, \n at 14, 433 feet should be coming into view \n as we pass over central Colorado shortly..\n\n NEKHORVICH (INT. CABIN - DAY)\n\n seems intent on the map, its changing times and distance. He \n checks his watch - the countdown has gone from 20 to three hours \n and 32 minutes as Nekhorvich is mesmerized by the descending \n seconds whipping by.\n\n ETHAN HUNT sits into shot on the vacant first class aisle seat \n beside Nekhorvich.\n\n ETHAN\n You keep staring at that watch as if your\n life depended on it, Doctor..\n\n NEKHORVICH \n Well, yes. I suppose I am a bit anxious.\n\n ETHAN\n They're ready and waiting. You'll soon be \n with old friends.\n\n NEKHORVICH \n (meaning Ethan)\n I'm with an old friend now, Dmitri.\n\n ETHAN\n Sorry it couldn't be under happier \n circumstances.\n\n NEKHORVICH \n Yes, I'm sorry too.. 'You're sorry and I'm\n sorry..'\n (bemused laughter, then looks at Ethan)\n - you do know Gradski thought the world of you.\n\n Nekhorvich is overcome. Ethan puts a comforting hand on his \n shoulder:\n\n ETHAN\n He was quite a man. Did he know before \n the end you two had succeeded?\n\n NEKHORVICH \n Yes, he knew. Just..\n\n ETHAN\n ..not in time to save him.\n\n NEKHORVICH \n No. After you've lived with Chimera for \n twenty hours, nothing can save you. Not \n even...Bellerophon.\n\n Nekhorvich pats the satchel.\n\n ETHAN\n You carry them together? Safely?\n\n With an almost impish grin and a wink:\n\n NEKHORVICH \n Yes, and you'll get us to a safe place \n with them, thank god!..left to my own \n devices, I'm an old fart too inept to read \n a railroad timetable!..\n\n Good-natured laughter. Cut off by a flight steward who passes \n by, giving a sidelong silence in Ethan and Nekhorvich's direction. \n Oxygen masks suddenly deploy from the ceiling. Passengers are \n puzzled and alarmed.\n\n CAPTAIN'S VOICE\n You Captain again. We've experienced a \n slight but abrupt drop in cabin pressure..\n \n A passenger struggling with his mask. As Nekhorvich fumbles with \n the strap on his mask he notes that the display screen shows \n their altitude is below 30,000 feet and dropping. He checks the \n countdown time on his watch again. Nekhorvich looks around him. \n The flight attendants are conspicuously absent and all the \n passengers who have on oxygen masks are passed out.\n\n INT - COCKPIT\n\n The flight crew now wearing their oxygen masks.\n\n CAPTAIN\n (into radio)\n Pan, pan, pan, Denver Center. This is \n Trans Pac Flight two-two-zero-seven, 747 \n heavy. We are not reading you. We're \n unable to maintain cabin pressurization. \n We have initiated a descent to one six\n thousand.\n\n The Co-pilot is working on the plane's altitude when his hands \n slip off the controls. His eyes flutter, then:\n\n CO-PILOT\n Captain, I don't..can't..\n\n He passes out. The Captain, HUGH STAMP, turns to verify that the\n relief pilot is also unconscious at the controls.\n\n He then removes his oxygen mask, sets the auto pilot, inputting \n numbers to slow the plane and descend. As the craft titles \n downward...\n\n INT - GALLERY\n\n The flight attendants are pulling on jump suits. Stamp emerges\n from the cockpit.\n\n INT - CABIN\n\n Ethan returns. Nekhorvich beckons to him. Ethan sits. Grinning \n around, Nekhorvich conspiratorially:\n\n NEKHORVICH\n ..it seems we have a problem, Dmitri.\n\n ETHAN\n (in the same tone)\n You keep calling me Dmitri. You really \n shouldn't.\n\n Nekhorvich's eyes narrow.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n You're not Dmitri?\n\n With a lightning swift move Ethan breaks Nekhorvich's neck.\n\n ETHAN\n - no.\n\n He grabs the satchel.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n (to Wallis)\n Wallis, hold onto it.\n\n Wallis slashes the satchel handle open, takes the satchel for \n Ambrose. He peels off the latex mask, revealing SEAN AMBROSE.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Ulrich, pull the -\n\n He tears off the vocal oscillator at his adam's apple, clears his \n throat, now as Ambrose:\n\n AMBROSE\n - pull the NO2 tank and dump it, it's potential evidence..\n\n STAMP\n (the 'captain' into shot)\n All done, chief..\n\n AMBROSE\n (what else)\n - right -\n (kidding)\n - don't go too far ahead of me now -\n\n STAMP\n Not possible..\n\n Ulrich has rolled back the carpet over an access panel just \n beneath them that leads to the belly of the plane. Stamp pulls \n back the panel, hops into the compartment below which is four \n walls of electronic equipment. Stamp kneels and slides back the \n floor hatch. The wind howls, puffs of cloud zip by beneath them. \n As they descend into the belly:\n\n WALLIS\n Checkpoint Charlie plus 30, altitude minus \n two-zero-thousand. Airspeed one-seven-\n niner knots..\n\n AMBROSE\n It's that time. Go.\n\n They don goggles and, with Ambrose in the lead, \n the team leaps, one after another from the hatch, sailing off\n into the sky.\n\n INT - COCKPIT (DAY)\t\t\t\t\t\t\n\n An automated voice repeats in an ominous monotone:\n\n VOICE\n Terrain, terrain. Pull up, pull up.\n\n The co-pilot stirs. He blearily rouses himself just in time to \n see:\n\n A mountain rushing toward him. As mountain meets airplane, the \n frame is filled with fire, but when camera pulls back from the \n fireball, it is in fact no more than a match head filling frame, \n which ignited, lights a fuse..\n\n The MI theme music kicks in, the main credits roll to:\n\n EXT - FACE OF MOUNTAIN (DAY)\n\n For a moment it might be thought part of the same range when the \n plane crashed but when Ethan Hunt climbs into frame the angle \n widen and titles down, revealing more of where he's come from \n than where he's going. Aside from the fact that he's in the \n midst of free-climbing what is easily a sheer rock face of at \n least a thousand feet, there's the sunny picture-postcard view of \n a lovely valley and pellucid lake thousands of feet below. Ethan \n climbs out of shot.\n\n WIDE UP ANGLE (DAY)\n\n revealing the summit, a light breeze hitting the lichen and \n whatever growth has a slender purchase on the rocky mountainside, \n fluffy clouds overhead.\n\n Ethan into shot. Despite the spectacularly precarious handholds \n he's using to hang onto the mountain and his life, he appears \n relaxed, engaged - for him - in the equivalent of busman's \n holiday. It's leisurely danger for Ethan; one might almost \n expect to hear Julie Andrews trilling 'Climb Every Mountain' on \n the soundtrack.\n\n Then a rock he's been grasping crumbles and Ethan drops about six \n inches before he grabs onto the mountain again. As he hangs by \n five fingers thousands of feet above the earth he doesn't seem \n terribly concerned until he spots a helicopter.\n\n It's materialized behind the summit and passes surprisingly close \n just overhead, casting its shadow downward over Ethan. \n Instinctively, Ethan flattens himself against the rock surface, \n as if the copter poses some sort of threat to him. But when \n its rotors whir it into the distance Ethan relaxes and resumes his \n climb.\n\n A HAIRY OVERHANG (EXT. MOUNTAIN - DAY)\n\n near the summit Ethan departing from the vertical and is now \n traversing the mountain with more of his back than his feet \n exposed to the earth far below. He's clinging to the mountain \n almost like a fly walking on the ceiling. When he reaches for a \n handhold that will restore him to the vertical, he dislodges a \n lizard - and manages to catch it before it plunges thousand of \n feet to oblivion.\n \n ETHAN\n Whoaa..\n\n He pockets the lizard, climbs the overhang.\n\n REVERSE ANGLE - SUMMIT\n\n with Ethan's hand, then Ethan coming into view and making the \n summit. He reaches into his pocket and releases the lizard who \n favors Ethan with a stern reptilian stare by way of gratitude. To \n lizard:\n\n ETHAN\n You're welcome.\n\n The lizard scampers off, then a low beeping sound at his back \n attracts his attention. He turns to see the source of the \n beeping, a small package in day-glo colors with a day-glo \n streamer. Ethan looks to the sky where the helicopter is now \n ominously circling back.\n\n Ethan lifts the day-glo package and waves it in the direction of \n the copter. With a distinct lack of enthusiasm.\n\n The helicopter once again turns, banks and disappears. Ethan has \n opened the beeping package and finds a pair of sunglasses.\n\n ETHAN'S POV SUNGLASSES\n\n First, a retinal scan.\n\n ELECTRONIC VOICE\n Identity confirmed.\n\n SWANBECK\n Good morning, Mr. Hunt.\n\n Swanbeck's face flashes onscreen. Over his introduction of Nyah \n is a series of satellite photographs whose subject is so elusive \n she never seems to give the camera a clean shot.\n\n SWANBECK'S VOICE\n Your mission, should you choose to accept \n it, requires you to recover a stolen item, \n designated Chimera. Essential to the \n mission is the recruitment of a civilian -- \n a Miss Nyah Nordoff-Hall. She is a highly \n capable professional thief currently \n active in Spain.\n\n A series of Nyah's 'accomplishments', i.e., warrants, complaints, \n Interpol summaries of her various criminal activities, as well as \n glimpses of the elusive Nyah circulating about Seville.\n\n SWANBECK'S VOICE (cont'd)\n Her dossier's available on I-COM 3. You \n have 48 hours to recruit Ms. Nordoff-Hall \n and meet me in Seville to receive further \n details. Should you or any member of your \n IM force be caught or killed, the \n Secretary will disavow all knowledge of \n your actions.\n\n Swanbeck's face reappears on screen:\n\n SWANBECK'S VOICE (cont'd)\n And Mr. Hunt - the next time you go on \n vacation, please be good enough to let us \n know where you're going. This message will \n self-destruct in five seconds.\n\n Ethan removes the glasses, then tosses them into space.\n\n ETHAN\n If I let you know where I'm going -\n\n The glasses explode in a puff of smoke.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n - won't be on holiday.\n\n Ethan, with a fair amount of disgust, gets to his feet and jumps \n off the mountain, in, what for a moment looks like a suicidal \n snit. Then, somewhere hundreds of feet below camera, there's a \n little puff of color as the tulip-shaped chute pops out of his \n back-pack. Begin the sound of a castanets and the animal-like cries \n of flamenco dancers.\n\n DISSOLVE TO:\n\n EXT - ANDALUSIAN VILLA (EVE)\n\n Bustling in the activity of a large private party, with arriving \n guests and attentive valets, as a young woman, her face unseen, \n exits her car and enters the villa.\n\n A FLASH OF SKIRT AND LACE (INT-EXT. VILLA - FLAMENCO DANCERS - EVE)\n\n where to the cries of dancers add graceful feminine hands \n wielding the castanets. The dancers perform on a raised platform \n and NYAH NORDOFF-HALL'S face can be glimpsed thru the swirling \n skirts and pounding heels, looking thru, not at them.\n\n REVERSE ANGLE - ETHAN\n\n looking back in a similar way to Nyah; surreal lighting and the \n relentless chorus of pounding heels seem to isolate them in the \n crowed party. Nyah continues to look at Ethan over the shoulder \n over her wanna-be escort, a very attentive gentleman. Nyah \n offers up her empty glass, and the gentleman eagerly takes it to \n the bar for a refill, leaving Nyah and Ethan looking at one \n another. Ethan approaches her.\n\n ETHAN\n Do you know me?\n\n NYAH\n No. Should I?\n\n ETHAN\n No. You just looked as if you did.\n\n NYAH\n No. Just as if I'd like to.\n\n ETHAN\n Oh. Well. I think that can be arranged.\n\n NYAH\n Not tonight. Bad timing. Sorry -\n\n ETHAN\n There's not enough time in the world for \n any of it to be bad.\n\n This stops her. Nyah moves closer to him, until they're nose \n to nose. Whispered but breezy:\n\n NYAH\n Look, it's either you or the rent and I \n don't mind telling you it's not an easy \n choice.\n\n ETHAN\n What if I pay the rent?\n\n NYAH\n Uh-huh.\n\n ETHAN\n Uh-huh?\n\n Glancing at the gentleman making his way back with her drink \n then:\n\n NYAH\n Go find the wealthy lady you came with and \n next time we meet - I'll pay your rent. \n (kissing him, sweetly)\n Now bugger off.\n\n And purposeful creature that she is, she takes her frustrated \n desire upstairs, timing her footsteps so as to use the sound of \n the dancer's steps to cover her own. Once upstairs, a security \n guard near the master bedroom can be seen eagerly following her\n down the hall, both moving past a pair of windows, visible to \n Ethan. In a few moments, Nyah can be seen past the \n windows in the opposite direction, without the guard following. \n In another moment or two, a very puzzled looking security guard \n can be glimpsed in the first window, looking up and down the \n hall, clearly having lost sight of Nyah. Ethan smiles, moves out \n of shot.\n\n INT - MASTER BEDROOM (EVE)\n\n Nyah has opened the door and moves swiftly thru the bedroom.\n\n INT - BATH (EVE)\n\n A decadent looking affair with suggestive lighting, mirrored \n walls. The tub has a tray across it which includes a wine cooler \n chilling a bottle of Crystal and a mound of caviar on a bed of \n ice. Nyah can't resist. She spoons a dollop of the caviar and \n downs it before she moves along the frescoed walls of the tub to \n its back. There, she pulls out her compact and removes the puff, \n revealing an electronic density meter. She turns it on and holds \n it at the rear of the tub. Its sweep gauge jumps sharply from \n green thru yellow and into red.\n\n NYAH\n (her fondest hopes confirmed)\n Mmmm.\n\n She now steps into the tub and focuses on the grout between the \n tiles just above the sop dish. Her knee eyes search for any \n cracks in the grout and she spots one. Using a tweezers she \n pulls the silver of the grout out from between the tiles, revealing \n something that looks like a credit card wedged between the tiles. \n She slips the card into a narrow opening under the sop dish.\n\n There's the sound of hydraulics and two arms move the marble \n casing out from the rear of the tub. Nyah breathes a sigh of \n relief and anticipation: kneeling in the tub she finds herself \n looking down at an open safe, revealing some half-dozen locked \n compartments. As she studies them:\n\n ETHAN\n Decisions, decisions.\n\n Nyah looks up to see Ethan's reflection in the bathroom \n mirrors, looking down at her kneeling in the tub.\n\n NYAH\n What are you doing here?\n\n ETHAN\n Think you're the only one who can pick a \n lock?\n\n NYAH\n (not altogether pleased)\n I see. You're not just another pretty face..\n\n Before Ethan can answer, a voice can be heard coming from the \n bedroom warbling Granada in Spanish, and with considerable gusto.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n Oh god. A bloody baritone.\n\n Nyah catches a reflection behind Ethan's in the bathroom mirror. \n She reaches up and grabs Ethan by the lapel, yanking him into the \n tub, pulling him down on top of her. Once again they're nose to \n nose.\n \n ETHAN\n I take it you prefer tenors.\n\n She glances up at the mirror. In it is the reflection of SENOR \n AUGUSTO DE L'ARENA, a big amiable Castilian in his fifties who's \n changing a white dinner jacket that's had wine split on it. He \n breaks into a heavily accented version of 'Now or Never', and \n disappears from the dressing room mirror.\n\n NYAH\n Would you mind if I'm on top?\n\n ETHAN\n Oh, either way works for me.\n\n With a jaundiced look she rolls over on top of Ethan and begins \n working on one of the safe compartments, using a tiny torque \n wrench from a tube of lipstick and a carbide pick from a mascara \n brush. She glances down and is rather disconcerted. Continues \n working with the pick and wrench.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n You're never gonna find it there.\n\n NYAH\n (she jumps, dropping the torque wrench)\n Damn it! Find what?\n\n ETHAN\n His ex-wife's Bulgari necklace that goes \n up for auction Tuesday.\n\n Looking down to Ethan, a touch of indignation:\n\n LOOKING UP\n\n more or less, hands locked behind his neck as he rests against \n the raked back of the tub, his eyes and nose inches from Nyah's \n lower pelvic region as she straddles him. Not exactly in the mood \n to move:\n\n She stiffens - he knows too damn much.\n\n NYAH\n - right..where is it?\n\n ETHAN\n Far right. \n\n She immediately switches her efforts from top left to the\n bottom right compartment. She's utterly nonplussed:\n\n NYAH\n Where's the bloody -\n\n ETHAN\n (plucking it off his chest,\n offering it up like a mechanic\n under the chassis)\n - torque wrench.\n\n NYAH\n - this is very disconerting..\n\n ETHAN\n Hey, you put me here. I just do what I'm\n told.\n\n NYAH\n - right..\n\n She unstraddles him and, with a few deft moves with the torque\n wrench and carbide pick - and it's open. She withdraws a velvet\n pouch and opens the pouch. Out spills the spectacular necklace.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n Lovely.\n (starting to close the safe)\n Who are you and what's it going to cost me?\n\n ETHAN\n (having sat up)\n I wouldn't do that.\n\n NYAH\n Do what?\n\n The alarm goes off.\n\n ETHAN\n That.\n\n The bathroom is suddenly filled with security guards, gun drawn\n Senor de l'Arena, looking highly upset, pops in.\n\n SENOR DE L'ARENA\n Oh, Senor Keyes, thank God it is you!\n (in Spanish to security guards,\n annoyed)\n It's Senor Keyes, the security engineer.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, Senor de l'Arena the goods news is\n that the heat sensors were activated. But\n Miss Nordoff-Hall, my associate -\n\n Senor de l'Arena kisses Nyah's hand.\n\n SENOR DE L'ARENA\n Mucho gusto, senorita.\n\n ETHAN\n - did feel that she had rather too long to\n work on the safe before they triggered the\n alarm, isn't that right Miss Hall?\n\n NYAH\n Oh yes. Absolutely. Much too long I\n should yes.\n\n Nyah's initial shock and panic slowly gives way to a wary,\n intensified curiosity - about Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n Under the circumstances I think we would\n recommend re-setting the senors to\n respond to a lighter load. How do you\n feel about forty kilos, Miss Hall?\n\n NYAH\n Indeed.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, Senor de l'Arena, there's no reason \n to disrupt your party any longer. we have\n some further concerns about the disposition\n of your security guards, which you'll\n receive in our written report by fax in the\n morning, hard copy to follow. Shall we?\n\n He offers Nyah his arm. They start out. Ethan immediately stops.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Miss Hall. Haven't you forgotten\n something?\n\n Nyah looking genuinely puzzled.\n\n NYAH\n The necklace?\n\n Nyah slowly reaches into her dress and withdraws the glittering\n string of diamonds and rubies from her bust.\n\n SENOR DE L'ARENA\n (a great kidder)\n What are you trying to do, senorita? Rob\n me.\n\n They all laugh, and Ethan's got her out the door.\n\n EXT - ANDALUSIAN VILLA (LATE NIGHT - PRE DAWN)\n\n The stars dimming, the sky a gun metal blue. Ethan and Nyah\n emerge from the villa, walking slowly. Nyah's clearly\n preoccupied.\n\n NYAH\n I'm missing something here, aside from a\n 500,000 pound necklace. Even after I\n botched the job, I could've walked out of \n there with the bloody thing.\n\n ETHAN\n At least you walked.\n\n NYAH\n If you weren't going to let me get away\n with it, why did you let me go thru with\n it?\n\n ETHAN\n Wanted to see how good you were.\n I'm hoping we might work together.\n\n NYAH\n May I say something, no offence? You\n look like a gigolo, you sound like a \n thief, you act like a cop - what the\n bloody hell do you have in mind?\n\n ETHAN\n Working under adverse conditions. Highly\n adverse conditions.\n\n NYAH\n Sounds smashing. I'm in. Muchacho, mi\n carro, por favor! Now be serious. You\n couldn't possibly want me off tonight's\n performance..\n\n ETHAN\n You didn't do that badly.\n\n Her car arrives.\n\n NYAH\n (as she moves to her car)\n You're apologizing for me? Quite the\n gentleman..\n\n ETHAN\n (opening the car door)\n Not really. I triggered the alarm..\n\n One foot on the floorboard she freezes, back to Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n Hey, the Bulgari job last week was\n flawless. And I've always been partial to\n pale yellows.\n\n She slides behind the wheel.\n\n NYAH\n (as he leads on the car)\n I don't do laundry, or put up with\n cheeky bastards who set me up on their\n territory so they can poach on mine.\n\n She takes off, spewing bits of gravel and dust in her wake.\n Ethan smiles and shakes his head.\n\n ON THE ROAD - NYAH (MOVING)\n\n around curves, hair flying, she's free. Her car phone rings.\n Perplexed, she lets it ring once or twice picks it up:\n\n NYAH\n (tentatively)\n Hola..\n\n ETHAN\n Hi. Would you mind slowing down?\n\n NYAH\n Where did you get this number? I don't\n even have it!\n\n ETHAN' VOICE\n Would you like it?\n\n She hits the End button and disconnects. The phone immediately\n rings again. She refuses to pick up. Ethan pulls alongside hers.\n She looks at him. They speak through the open cars.\n\n ETHAN\n Pull over and listen to me, will you?\n Just listen..\n\n NYAH\n Listen to what?\n\n ETHAN\n I need your help and I thin you can use\n mine.\n\n NYAH\n Your help? What are you talking about?\n\n ETHAN\n Scotland Yard, Interpol, every Dutch\n authority. I can make them go away.\n\n NYAH\n Oh bloody hell. You're a spy.\n\n She floors it and shoots ahead of Ethan, nicking his car as she takes off.\n\n ETHAN\n (to himself)\n I deserved that.\n\n SERIES OF DRIVING SHOTS - NYAH AND ETHAN\n\n Ethan rings her again. And keeps ringing. Her face becomes\n grim, her flight progressively more desperate and with Ethan's\n pursuit progressively more determined. They are reaching the\n limits of adhesion around blind curves.\n\n MORE SHOTS DRIVING (DAWN)\n\n The sky's battleship gray; Ethan pursues Nyah around hairpin\n turns high above the Costa del Sol; they rip thru patches of\n marine fog drifting on the road, obscuring it.\n\n Both are appalled by the other's willingness to escalate risk in\n this game of flight and pursuit until Ethan tears thru a fogbank\n and sees on his GPS what Nyah can't see thru the fog - \n less than four hundred meters ahead is a turn she can't possibly\n negotiate and if she can't she'll plunge off the road hundreds of\n feet to rock and sea below. Ringing her number again:\n\n ETHAN\n (half to himself)\n Slow down, slow down.\n\n She turns up a mound and loses control. She spins out and heads\n toward the edge of the cliff.\n\n NYAH\n (realizing she's in trouble)\n Uh-oh.\n\n Ethan cuts her off and sends them both into a 540 degree spin.\n Her car stops just at the cliff's edge.\n\n Furious she wrenches open the car door and gets out.\n\n ETHAN\n No!\n\n Suddenly there's no Nyah. Ethan leaps over to Nyah's car and\n sees Nyah dangling over the ocean and rocks hundreds of feet\n below, holding the door handle.\n\n NYAH\n Oh..oh..\n\n Taking a firm grip on her wrist.\n\n ETHAN\n Don't look down. Just..look at me.\n That's it..that's it..\n\n He pulls Nyah up to the car, across the seat and half into\n his arms. For a long moment it looks like she's in shock. Then:\n \n NYAH\n What's you name?\n\n ETHAN\n Ethan Hunt.\n\n NYAH\n Well, Ethan Hunt, what is it you want to\n talk to me about?\n\n Thru the veil of morning fog, Nyah looks at Ethan. Her dark eyes\n suggest wit, and willingness, and longing.\n\n ETHAN\n ...more than I thought..\n \n They scarcely to move to bring their lips together:\n\n NYAH\n Awfully short notice..\n\n ETHAN\n Care to wait a decent interval?\n\n NYAH\n Who wants to be decent?..\n\n DISSOLVE:\n\n CLOSE - ETHAN (INT-EXT. SAFEHOUSE - SEVILLE - DAY-EVE)\n\n sleeping. His eyes open slowly. He comes to full consciousness,\n his head still on the pillow. Something approaching serious\n anxiety informs his features. He lifts his head and looks at his\n left, angle widening. Nyah lies on her side facing him, \n sleeping serenely. Anxiety on the order of oh-God-this-isn't-\n approved-recruiting-technique, confirmed. He lets his head flop\n back on the pillow. Then he turns so he and Nyah are profile to-\n profile. As he looks at her sleeping his anxiety fades, replaced\n by curiosity and even wonder. He lifts his hand and just\n brushes her cheek. Her eyes open. She knows where she is.\n\n ETHAN\n So what've you got against spooks?\n\n Nyah smiles.\n\n NYAH\n When they've got your recruiting\n technique? Not a thing.\n\n ETHAN\n Oh. Well..this isn't exactly by the book.\n\n NYAH\n They've got a book for this?\n\n ETHAN\n They've got a book for everything.\n\n NYAH\n The only other spook I knew was a liar.\n Charming but absolutely incapable of\n telling the truth. He'd lie about his\n favorite color. But then I reckon it's an\n occupational hazard. All spies really do\n is conceal the truth and tell lies.\n\n ETHAN\n Not revealing information doesn't\n necessarily make someone a liar.\n\n NYAH\n That's not the point. In the end what\n spies rely on is the one thing they think\n they know that you don't.\n\n ETHAN\n Which is?\n\n NYAH\n That they're lying.\n\n Ethan laughs.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n ..once they know that they can\n get very very..crosee..\n\n Nyah shoulder and moves into Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n So where did I got right?\n\n NYAH\n You're not a liar. Or you're an awfully\n good one..\n (then)\n ..this thing these blokes pinched..\n\n ETHAN\n I don't know that they 'pinched' it.\n Don't even know that they're blokes.\n\n Nyah stops to think about this.\n\n NYAH\n Well, then, what I am I doing here? I assume\n I'm meant to be some sort of thief-to\n catch-a-thief..\n\n ETHAN\n So do I. Sort of.\n\n Nyah looks at Ethan, a little worried.\n\n NYAH\n Spoken like a spook..you ever afraid?\n\n ETHAN\n Of what?\n\n Nyah laughs.\n\n NYAH\n Ask a question, you get an answer!..\n\n ETHAN\n Damn, you're beautiful.\n\n NYAH\n That's because I'm on my back.\n\n Quick as a cat Ethan flips Nyah over so she's looking down\n at him.\n\n ETHAN\n I don't think so.\n\n She sinks into his arms.\n\n EXT-INT - STREET - SEVILLE (VALENCIA FESTIVAL) (EVE)\n\n Ethan's step is unusually jaunty as he bounces along, making his\n way thru the festive and jostling crowds preparing for the Crema\n portion of the Fallas de Valencia. On this night great papier\n mache effigies, some serious, some comic, are placed all thru the\n city and torched in great bonfires. Outside the bar Ethan's\n looking for there's a street vendor, hawking Fallas mementos and\n flowers. He starts past the vendor, and it hits him - he's going \n to buy some flowers.\n\n He chooses a colorful spring bouquet so fresh the dew can be\n seen on the petals. Ethan pays the vendor, starts into the bar,\n and thinks better of walking into Swanbeck with the bouquet.\n Turns back to the vendor.\n\n ETHAN\n Are you gonna be here a while?\n\n VENDOR\n Si, senor.\n\n ETHAN\n I'll pick'em up on my way out, okay?\n\n Ethan enter the bar and goes upstairs to the second floor where\n he passes security at a pair of double doors.\n\n INT - IMF BRIEFING ROOM\n\n Swanbeck stands looking out the window. Noisy crowds from the\n festival provides a constant walla, and during the sequence, the\n first effigies are lit, and smoke and flame provide a vivid\n background thru briefing room's window.\n\n SWANBECK\n Fetival's a pain in the ass. Honoring\n saint by setting'em on fire.\n (turning to Ethan)\n Sit down, sit down.\n\n Ethan sits.\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n Let's you know what they think of saints,\n doesn't it? Damn near set me on fire on\n my way over here. As if I haven't been\n burned enough today.\n\n A moment where it's impossible to tell which way the wind is\n going to blow between these two. Then civilly:\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n Sorry I barged in on your vacation.\n\n ETHAN\n Sorry I didn't let you know where I was.\n\n SWANBECK\n Don't be. Wouldn't be on vacation if you did.\n\n ETHAN\n Well. You're sorry and I'm sorry.\n\n SWANBECK\n Why did you phrase it like that?\n\n ETHAN\n Like what?\n\n SWANBECK\n 'You're sorry and I'm sorry.'\n\n ETHAN\n You gotta be kidding.\n\n Swanbeck turns to his computer and begins play on a DVD, and\n projected onto a computer screen staring back at Ethan is:\n\n VLADIMIR NEKHORVICH\n\n NEKHORVICH\n (with exaggerate brio)\n Well, Dmitri! How are you?..\n\n Nekhorvich pauses as if waiting for reply. Ethan smiles.\n\n ETHAN\n ..I'm fine..and you?\n\n NEKHORVICH\n I'm fine..\n\n Ethan laughs.\n\n ETHAN\n I'm fine and you're fine..\n\n With Ethan simultaneously whispering:\n\n NEKHORVICH\n I'm fine too.. I'm fine and you're fine - do\n you remember, dear fried, how you got\n Sergei and I to repeat those lines from Dr.\n Strangelove and we gave you the name of that \n silly Soviet Premier because we didn't know\n your name?..In those days, you not only\n saved our lives, you saved our sanity. 'Now,\n then Dmitri - we have this little problem':\n Every search for a hero must begin with\n something that every hero requires; a \n villain. Therefore, in a search for our\n hero, Bellerophon, we created a monster\n Chimera. I beg you, Dmitri, come to Sydney\n and accompany me to Atlanta immediately.\n However we travel, I must arrive at me\n destination, within 20 hours of departure.\n Forgive this fanciful explanation, but for\n now prudence dictates that I communicate\n nothing but the gravest urgency.\n I fear I can entrust this to no one but\n you, Dmitri. as we say, 'I'm sorry and\n you're sorry'..\n\n Swanbeck stops the DVD.\n\n SWANBECK\n Let me ask you something. You have any\n idea what the hell he's talking about?\n\n Ethan smiles.\n\n ETHAN\n An idea, yeah.\n\n SWANBECK\n Like?\n\n ETHAN\n Like it's a good idea to pick him up in a\n hurry. And a bad idea to fly him on a\n commercial carrier. So let's get on with\n it. He's still in Sydney?\n\n SWANBECK\n Dr. Vladimir Nekhorvich is dead. So is his\n colleague, Gradski, but that happened\n earlier. We had Nekhorvich on a flight\n from Sydney that crashed in the Rockies..\n\n Ethan sits back, heavily.\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n - Hunt, are you listening?..\n\n Slowly looking up:\n\n ETHAN\n If he didn't want to go anywhere without\n me, how did you get him on the flight?\n\n SWANBECK\n You were there.\n\n Swanbeck clears his throat. He turns back to the computer and \n punches in: MISSION DOUBLE IMAGE. File open to computer scans\n of AMBROSE, SEAN, and HUNT, ETHAN, the computer scanning and\n comparing their features, millimeter by millimeter, stat by stat,\n as the computer then imposes, with the help of the physiognomy\n scan, Ethan's face on Ambrose: hence, mission double image.\n\n ETHAN\n\n slowly looks up at Swanbeck.\n\n SWANBECK\n When I couldn't find you, I had to replace\n you. Sean Ambrose was the obvious choice.\n He double you, what? Two, three times?\n\n ETHAN\n Twice.\n\n SWANBECK\n What did you think of him?\n\n ETHAN \n You know we had reservations about each\n other. Isn't it a little late in the day\n to be asking me that?\n\n SWANBECK\n Not necessarily.\n\n Swanbeck shows Ethan a photo of airline Captain.\n\n SWANBECK\n Airline record list Captain Harold\n Macintosh as the pilot for Flt 2207. as\n far as the media and all governmental\n agencies are concerned, Captain Macintosh\n died on the flight, but in fact he missed\n it. He did, however make the next flight -\n in cargo, stuffed into a rather small \n suitcase considering his size.\n\n Another photo of an open suitcase, the body in it partially\n obscured by a ring of police and customs officers.\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n Someone on that flight planned an\n operation designed to down the plane and\n make it look like an accident. Someone\n skillful enough to bring the whole thing\n off without a hitch but - they don't\n always get your luggage on the plane, even\n when you fly first class.\n\n ETHAN\n So there's one thing we know Ambrose\n doesn't.\n\n SWANBECK\n Then you do think it was Ambrose.\n\n Ethan barely nods.\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n And you're not surprised.\n\n Ethan gives Swanbeck a look.\n\n ETHAN\n Whatever Nekhorvich was carrying Sean\n wanted and he wanted to conceal the fact\n that he took it.\n\n SWANBECK\n Enough to kill Nekhorvich and two hundred\n innocent passengers?\n\n Ethan smiles.\n\n ETHAN\n Sean feels he hasn't done the job unless\n he leaves a lot of hats on the ground.\n\n SWANBECK\n The question is why? What was this\n Chimera Nekhorvich was carrying?\n\n Ethan rises and moves to the window.\n\n ETHAN\n Right now only Ambrose knows that.\n\n SWANBECK\n In any case, you've got to recover Chimera\n and bring it to us.\n\n ETHAN\n In order to do that, I've got to figure\n out how he plans to make money with it.\n\n SWANBECK\n - right. In fact since the plane went\n down our banking sources have confirmed a\n marked increase in the stock pilling of\n cash in terrorists accounts.\n\n ETHAN\n 'Terrorists?'\n\n SWANBECK\n Well you know Nekhorvich's history.\n You're the one who got him out of the\n Soviet Union was it still in bio-\n weapon business.\n\n ETHAN\n If that's what you're thinking Ambrose\n would have set up a bidding situation with\n any number of buyers before he got on the\n plane. Locating him in time to stop\n something like that - \n\n SWANBECK\n - is where Miss Hall comes in.\n\n ETHAN\n (blindsided)\n Excuse me?\n\n SWANBECK\n Miss Hall and Ambrose had a relationship\n which he took very seriously. She walked\n away and he's wanting her back ever\n since. We believe she's our surest and \n quickest way of location him.\n\n ETHAN\n (acidly)\n And then what?\n\n SWANBECK\n Then makes sure she continues to see him.\n Gets him confide in her and report to\n you.\n\n ETHAN\n You made it sound as if I was recruiting\n her for her skills as a thief.\n\n SWANBECK\n Well, then I mislead you. Or you made the \n wrong assumption. Either way we're asking\n her to resume a prior relationship, not do \n anything she hasn't already done.\n\n ETHAN\n She's got no training for this kind of\n thing.\n\n SWANBECK\n Go to bed with a man and lie to him?\n She's a woman. She's got all the training\n she needs.\n\n Ethan's anger flashes but does his best to contain it.\n\n ETHAN\n I don't think I can get her to do it.\n\n SWANBECK\n You mean it'll be difficult.\n\n ETHAN\n Very.\n\n SWANBECK\n Well it's not mission difficult, Hunt.\n It's mission impossible. Difficult should\n be a walk in the park for you. If you can\n think of a quicker way to get to Ambrose,\n you're welcome to try. Oh, by the way, you\n might want to take a look at these..if you\n have any further qualms about getting her\n to do the job.\n\n He pulls out a little Minolta digital camera (identical to the\n one in Nekhorvich's bag at airport security). Swanbeck sets it on\n the table. Ethan picks it up the tiny camera and puts it to his eye.\n\n EXT - BAR (NIGHT)\n\n A grim Ethan, starring fixedly ahead of him emerges to an ever\n more lively crowd. as he does:\n\n STREET VENDOR\n Senor, senor! Your flowers.\n\n The vendor holds up the spring bouquet. Ethan seems genuinely\n surprised by them.\n\n ETHAN\n Yes. They're very nice..\n\n And he's lost in the crowd, leaving a very puzzled vendor holding\n the bouquet.\n\n STILL OF CRASH SITE IN ROCKIES (THRU MINOLTA STILL CAMERA)\n\n One after the other flashing by. They are more evocative than\n specific in their suggestion of an abrupt, fiery, ending, where\n the lives of hundred are literally and figuratively torn apart\n and strewn over a desolate landscape.\n\n NYAH\n\n carefully places the little Minolta on a glass-topped coffee\n table. She's beautifully pulled together, the safehouse has the\n lights low, flamenco music playing, and when she walks out onto\n the balcony Ethan sees the candlelit table and a bottle of\n champagne chilling. There's a light breeze the fire from the\n burning effigies throwing smoke and flame all over the city.\n\n NYAH\n What's the population of Seville any\n idea?\n\n ETHAN\n Five, six-hundred thousand.\n\n NYAH\n There's nearly 2 million in London.\n\n ETHAN\n And six billion in the world.\n\n NYAH\n That's lot of people out there..how many\n of them, I wonder, are capable of\n something like that?\n\n ETHAN\n Sean Ambrose, for one.\n\n A long shocked moment. Nyah laughs.\n\n NYAH\n Right...\n\n INT - SAFEHOUSE (EVE - LATER)\n\n The pounding beat of the flamenco music seems to fill the room\n Nyah's back to Ethan:\n\n NYAH\n (grimly amused)\n Not that it matter much but..I seem to\n recall you staying something like, 'I was\n hoping we could work together.'\n\n ETHAN\n This wasn't what I had in mind, Nyah.\n\n NYAH\n But it is what you'd like me to do.\n so tell me to do it..\n\n She approaches Ethan. They're inches apart.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n Come on, out with it. Tell me to go and\n insinuate myself back into Sean's life.\n\n ETHAN\n Go and insinuate yourself back into Sean's\n life.\n\n NYAH\n I'd like a little more conviction..\n\n ETHAN\n So would I. But it's not mine to give.\n\n NYAH\n (archness there)\n You've either got it or you don't. Let\n your conscience be your guide?\n\n ETHAN\n Something like that.\n\n With a smile and a wink.\n\n NYAH\n But I don't have a conscience. I'm a\n bloody thief.\n\n ETHAN\n You can be a thief and have a conscience.\n\n NYAH\n No. You can be a thief and have a\n conscience: Not me. Why did you have to\n tell me about this!\n (pouring herself a drink)\n What do I have to do to get away from this\n guy? When you're with him, he messes\n about with your head every waking\n moment..even now I'll be at some out-of-\n the-way-place, a tin of caviar and a \n bottle of Crystal shows up at the table,\n with two glass, God knows how he finds \n out at any given moment where I am in the\n world but he does. And it looks like he's\n done it again. You know his definition of\n a true paranoid?\n\n ETHAN\n I don't.\n\n NYAH\n Someone in possession of all the facts.\n (she turns away, pauses)\n Are you telling me I have to do this?\n\n ETHAN\n Generally, I don't favor coercing someone.\n Not when there's a chance my life could\n end up in their hands.\n\n NYAH\n And that's the only reason?\n\n ETHAN\n Can you think of a better one?\n\n NYAH\n Not me. I was just hoping you might..or\n that..somehow in the course of business\n this got personal as well as physical.\n\n ETHAN\n Look, would it make you feel better if I\n didn't want you to do this?\n\n NYAH\n Much.\n\n ETHAN\n Then feel better!..\n\n Long moment while she looks at him.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Well. That made all the difference in the \n world, didn't it?\n\n Ethan walks out onto the balcony. She looks at his back.\n\n NYAH\n Sean will never be anything but suspicious\n if he picks up some sort of 'yoo-hoo-I'm-\n not-nad' message. Not after the way we\n broke up.\n\n ETHAN\n What wouldn't make him suspicious?\n\n NYAH\n Probably that I needed him in some urgent\n way..destitute - in serious trouble..the\n kind I couldn't possible sort out myself..\n\n Ethan's been smiling slightly.\n\n ETHAN\n Serious trouble, Nyah, is something I can\n always arrange..\n\n NYAH IN A SPANISH JAIL\n\n standing for front and side mug shot. O.S. sound of teletype\n continues. SUPERIMPOSE: Ethan holding up something the size of\n a dime:\n \n ETHAN\n This little chip sends a coded signal that\n can be picked up only by our computer.\n\n On the screen of the GPS computer, a little yellow blip appears\n pulsating on the screen.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n When it's in your ankle we can track you\n within three feet of anywhere in the \n world.\n\n OVER ETHAN AND ONTO COMPUTER SCREEN\n\n He types a small Interpol bulletin stating that Nyah Nordoff\n Hall, apprehended March 13 in Seville, is awaiting extradition\n while the authorities in London, Paris, and Amsterdam squabble\n over where she's going to be tried first, for the various thefts\n and burglaries she's committed in the three cities.\n\n COMPUTER SCREEN (AMBROSE TENT ANNEX - DAY)\n\n Ambrose picking up on a version of the Interpol bulletin Ethan's\n put out. He leans over the screen for a moment, then moves to\n the window, and stares out thoughtful at the bay, almost as if\n he were watching...\n\n EXT - NYAH IN JAIL COURTYARD\n\n From a beautiful blue sky, pan down to the courtyard of the jail\n where Nyah is allowed out for an airing, seemingly alone but \n being watched by:\n\n ETHAN AND COMPUTER SCREEN\n \n His attention fixed on the screen, Ethan stares at satellite\n shot of Nyah in the jail courtyard.\n\n INT - PRISON - NYAH\n\n being allowed a phone call, a prison guard visible b.g. Cross\n cut with Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n Look, I can't run your arrest in CNN, but\n I guarantee he's monitoring every law \n enforcement agency in the world, for what\n they might be saying about him, if nothing\n else - he's got the ability and, we\n assume, the desire to get you out of\n there.\n\n NYAH\n This doesn't seem to be accomplishing\n much.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, I mean it's not a total loss. It is\n keeping a very capable thief off the\n street..\n\n NYAH\n Very funny..maybe he has heard and\n doesn't want to know. Maybe he's lost\n interest.\n\n Her guard, b.g. is handed a note.\n\n GUARD\n (to Nyah)\n Your lawyer to see you.\n\n NYAH\n What lawyer?\n\n ETHAN AND COMPUTER SCREEN\n\n ETHAN\n Well, here we go.\n\n SECTOR: AUSTRALIA, moving into NEW SOUTH WALES, and then to:\n Sydney. Here Ethan pulls up names, photos and profiles of \n potential candidates. They scroll past, one face morphing into\n another. Ethan punches in on WILLIAM A. BAIRD. EXPERTISE:\n Qualified in virtually every mode of transport, land, sea, air.\n ORDINANCES: Small arms and automatic weapons authority, edged and\n impact weapons. PROCUREMENT: Resourceful. EXPLOSIVES: Precision\n detonation, diffusion.\n\n Ethan punches: Request immediate availability.\n\n EXT - GOVERNMENT BUILDING - SEVILLE (DAY)\n\n Nyah emerges from the entrance to the jail.\n\n ETHAN\n Stop and look for something in you\n purse..kneel down..\n\n She does. They're effectively blocked from the street.\n\n NYAH\n Limo's waiting.\n\n Ethan hands her a key chain with what appear to be a car-key.\n\n ETHAN\n - Ambrose will have counter-surveillance\n second to no one's. When and if he\n contacts you, push this button\n before you actually end up under his roof \n it'll scramble your transmission to us.\n\n She takes the key chain. Her hands are shaking.\n\n NYAH\n When will you be there?\n\n \n ETHAN\n Before you are.\n\n NYAH\n How can you possibly? I've got to get\n right on the plane. I'm leaving now.\n\n ETHAN\n You don't trust me.\n\n NYAH\n Oh, I do. But as we know I'm a very poor\n judge of character.\n\n ETHAN\n He's got you on Qantas flight 2735. It's\n going to be delayed.\n\n NYAH\n Yes?\n\n ETHAN\n You'll be fine. I'm going to lose\n you.\n\n NYAH\n Ethan, you take care of yourself, I'll\n take care of myself because if push comes\n to shove, I'm gonna bail - and without\n giving two week notice.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, forewarned is forearmed. And while\n we're at it, be especially sensitive to\n any sudden change in Ambrose's plans,\n especially any involving you..\n\n They rise. A quick squeeze of her hand and he's gone. A look of\n something like longing replaces the toughness as she gazes after\n him, then starts across the street toward the limo and driver. MI\n music theme kicks in and continues over:\n\n POV HELICOPTER (MOVING - SYDNEY - DAY)\n\n over the Harbor Bridge, sails dotting the bay like confetti.\n\n EXT - FARM (DAY)\n\n pans of sheep are bleating and looking for sort of cover in\n response to the sound of a helicopter touching down.\n\n EXT - COPTER (DAY)\n\n Billy and Luther emerge, Luther with computer looking acutely\n uncomfortable in a wrinkled suit.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n Welcome to Australia, mate.\n\n They look up to a smiling Ethan who points to the ground beneath\n Luther's feet. Luther looks down to see that he is standing in a\n pile of sheep-shit.\n\n LUTHER\n Thanks - mate.\n\n Both men laugh and all three move to:\n\n INT - FARMHOUSE (DAY)\n\n Luther and Billy with Ethan setting up their operation. There's\n a blip on one of the screens.\n\n LUTHER\n It's the transponder.\n\n ETHAN\n Put in the coordinates and let's get a \n visual. The visuals aren't coming up.\n\n LUTHER\n The satellite doesn't work as fast as I\n do.\n\n BILLY\n Yeah, I've heard about you, Luther, and I\n just want to tell you it's an honor and a\n pleasure to be working with you blokes,\n whoaa! That's some transponder!\n\n As Billy speaks, the visual come on line and Nyah has become\n visible.\n\n LUTHER\n (a jaundiced eye, to Ethan)\n It certainly is. How did we get so lucky?\n\n Ethan pointedly ignore the question.\n\n POV - MOVING (PALM BEACH - DAY)\n\n rounding the tip of the bay's crescent, revealing the beach and\n dock at Ambrose's palm-lined residence.\n\n NYAH\n\n The speedboat's engine's are cut. Nyah looks momentarily\n stricken.\n\n POV NYAH (MOVING)\n\n a lone slender figure silhouetted at the end of the dock, still\n as the piling besides which it stands. But the features remain\n obscured by the sun at his back.\n\n ETHAN\n\n leans forward as the slender figure grows larger,\n\n BILLY \n (to Ethan)\n Is it him, then?\n\n POV - MOVING\n\n The tide is too low for the boat to dock, making it necessary for\n he boat to approach the shore. The slender figure moves off the\n end of the dock and onto the beach.\n\n THE CIGARETTE\n\n idles into shadow water but the props start chewing into the\n sand - the boatman grumbles he can't get any closer. The slender\n figure has moved to the shoreline and the angle of the light\n changes - Ambrose is waiting.\n\n Nyah hesitates only a flicker of an instant, slips over the side\n into thigh-high water without taking her eyes off Ambrose.\n Ambrose strides right on into the bay. as they are just an arm's\n length apart:\n\n NYAH\n\n takes a deep breath, presses the button to scramble the\n transponder.\n\n WITH ETHAN (INT. SHEEPFARM SAFEHOUSE)\n\n The picture abruptly goes dead.\n\n BILLY\n Damn. Just when it was about to get\n interesting.\n\n ETHAN\n It's okay. She scrambled the\n transmission. Luther, continue feeding\n the GPS her position.\n\n Luther punches in. The signal - and the global coordinates are\n given. They wait.\n\n INT - SPACE\n\n The satellite positions itself.\n\n WITH THE THREE\n \n ETHAN\n Can't we speed this up.\n\n Luther shoots him a disgusted look.\n\n LUTHER\n With what? This is the only computer\n that'll do this.\n \n THE SIGNALS AND PHOTOS\n\n start to bounce back, growing larger and larger on the screen,\n until: Nyah can be seen, water up to her thighs, lingering in\n Ambrose's arms with each blow-up, and linger. And lingering.\n\n BILLY\n - right. Now there's a bloke who knows\n how to deliver a proper welcome. Don't\n get me wrong, mate. You were quite\n hospitable. Is it him, then?\n\n Ethan's look suggests he's worried about lapse in recruiting\n judgment.\n\n LUTHER\n It is, Billy.\n\n BILLY\n Then we got'em!\n\n ETHAN\n We don't know what we've got because we\n don't know what he's got, where he's got\n it or what he's doing in Sydney with it.\n\n Ethan strides away from the screen, the edge in his voice and the \n move not altogether lost on either Luther or Billy.\n\n INT - THE BAY (EXT. PALM BEACH - DAY)\n\n Perfectly poised, still loosely in his arms, Nyah returns\n Ambrose's penetrating gaze with a pleasant, clear eyed one.\n\n AMBROSE\n Not much luggage.\n\n NYAH\n I left in a bit of a hurry. I'm terribly\n grateful, Sean.\n\n AMBROSE\n How grateful?\n\n NYAH\n Well that depends.\n\n AMBROSE\n On what.\n\n NYAH\n How hard you had to work to get me out of\n there..how in the world did you ever find me?\n\n AMBROSE\n (stopping)\n How I usually find you, Nyah.\n\n NYAH\n How do you that.\n\n AMBROSE\n Magic...\n\n NYAH\n Ahh..\n\n POV THRU TENT ANNEX WINDOW (AMBROSE COMPOUND)\n\n looking down the length of the dock. Ambrose, his arm around\n Nyah and carrying her suitcase, moves up the dock toward the\n house and camera.\n\n Stamp steps into the annex and looks over to Wallis, who watches \n Nyah on the monitors.\n\n WALLIS\n No flies on her.\n (checking her on a scanner\n screen)\n No bugs either. She's clean.\n\n STAMP\n (drily)\n All cats are.\n\n INT - ETHAN - SAFEHOUSE (SHEEP FARM - DAY)\n\n Ethan watches the Nekhorvich video on the computer screen.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n ...therefore in a search for our hero,\n Bellerophon, we created a monster,\n Chimera.\n\n Ethan then flips through a series of pictures on the computer\n depicting the myth of Bellerophon attacking Chimera.\n\n Billy moves up behind him.\n\n BILLY\n What you got there, mate?\n\n ETHAN\n A myth..just a myth...shouldn't you be\n checking out their countersurveillance?\n\n BILLY\n Well you know his blokes'll place the \n OSCOR in his annex, where else if you're\n pinpointing transmitters, video signals,\n covert chip cameras, anything radiating,\n oscillating..\n\n ETHAN\n ..or hard wired..\n\n BILLY\n (please)\n - or hard wired, right. First line of \n perimeter defence'll run from the back of\n the dock to the front of the house.\n Whatever moves burps or bleep is gonna be\n picked up to a height of twenty feet.\n Basically impenetrable, I'd say.\n\n LUTHER\n Ethan, here's Nekhorvich, and here's his\n boss\n\n Luther scans an entry from the IMF database with newspaper\n clippings, sidebars of still of McCloy and Nekhorvich.\n\n LUTHER (cont'd)\n McCloy, Jon Chaddick, CEO Biocyte\n Pharmaceuticals..D.O.B. September 30,\n 1952, Manchester, England.\n\n BILLY \n (a little lost)\n Well do you disagree with that?\n\n ETHAN\n Not at all. But how about going into town\n and confirming your intuitions on site?\n\n BILLY\n Oh well, if that's how you feel about it.\n\n Billy leaves.\n\n LUTHER\n ..then Cambridge..Harvard..entrepreneurial\n efforts..in efforts..in 1989, acquired Biocyte in\n hostile takeover..\n\n As Luther transfer info to Ethan's computer:\n\n LUTHER (cont'd)\n Ethan, have a look at this.\n\n On Ethan's screen appears the Biocyte website; where among he\n various icons one offer McCloy's proud detailing of Biocyte's\n philanthropic efforts:\n\n MCCLOY'S VOICE\n We at out state-of-the-art solar powered\n Biocyte building recognized that eternal\n vigilance is the price of health.. whether\n it's funding the teaching center at the \n Royal Prince Edward Hospital, removing\n aerosol products from the marker or\n braving the influenza quarantine at Bruny\n island late last month..at Biocyte your\n life..is our life's work..\n\n ETHAN\n (quietly)\n ..Biocyte workers at Bruny Island.\n\n INT - AMBROSE'S (DAY)\n\n They've reached the head of the stairs. Ambrose opens a door.\n It's a large bedroom opening onto a veranda with a view of the\n tent annex and the beach, and a very large bed.\n\n NYAH\n Your room.\n\n AMBROSE\n (yes)\n Mmmm.\n\n NYAH\n And my room?\n\n A long moment. Ambrose walks to a mirrored wall. The mirrors\n are sliding doors. With a sweeping gesture, he slides one of the\n mirrors back and reveals a wardrobe of beautiful designer\n clothes.\n\n AMBROSE\n Thought you could use a little something\n to wear.\n\n Nyah stares at the spectacular wardrobe. Ambrose pulls out a\n slinky Armani and drapes it on the bed.\n\n AMBROSE ( cont'd)\n Try it on..\n\n Nyah hesitates.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Go ahead. I'm dying to see if I \n remembered your size..\n\n Nyah picks it up.\n\n NYAH\n No changing room?\n\n Ambrose sits on a chair by the window and waits. Her blouse,\n belt, skirt, fall on the bed. As her slender arm reaches down to\n pick up the Armani:\n\n AMBROSE\n\n grips her wrist, the flimsy Armani dangling in the air.\n\n CLOSE - NYAH\n\n meeting Ambrose's look.\n\n NYAH\n You're not interested in seeing how it\n looks.\n\n AMBROSE\n Oh, I am. Later..\n\n The Armani falls in a fragile heap on the floor.\n\n CLOSE - ETHAN (DUSK)\n\n standing off to one side, listening to Nekhorvich's voice.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n ..therefore in a search for our hero,\n Bellerophon, we created a monster,\n Chimera.\n\n LUTHER\n Why's Nekhorvich going on about an old Greek myth?\n\n ETHAN\n Nekhorvich specialized in recombining DNA\n molecules. In the myth, Bellerophon killed\n Chimera, a recombinant monster with the head\n of a lion and the tail of a serpent who\n plagued the ancient world. I think Nekhorvich\n has created a monster virus in Chimera and \n apparently the means to kill it in\n Bellerophon.\n\n LUTHER\n That simple, huh?\n\n ETHAN\n Why not?\n\n CLOSE - NYAH (INT. AMBROSE BEDROOM - DUSK)\n\n lying back on a pillow, looking and off into space to right\n off camera. She hears Ambrose's voice, with Ethan's voice\n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE/ETHAN'S VOICE\n Damn, you're beautiful..\n\n Nyah reacts as if she'd been rapped on the nose, her eyes\n moist. She turns abruptly to camera.\n\n NYAH\n Did you say something?\n\n AMBROSE\n\n leaning on an elbow, looking down.\n\n AMBROSE\n I said you're beautiful, Nyah.\n\n NYAH\n Only because..it's spring..chalk it up\n (looking him dead in the eye)\n - to spring fever.\n\n Ambrose, amused, lights a cigarette and inhaling:\n\n AMBROSE\n Won't do, love. It's not spring. It's\n nearly autumn..You're in Oz. everything's\n upside down and backwards here.\n\n NYAH\n (more direct)\n Maybe that's it, then. Everything's upside\n down and backwards...\n\n CLOSE - ETHAN (SHEEP FARM SAFEHOUSE - DUSK)\n\n ETHAN\n Luther..get us everything you can on the \n outbreak of influenza on Bruny Island last\n month, including photos of the victims.\n\n LUTHER\n Right. I guess there aren't many flu\n epidemics in the middle of summer.\n\n Luther resumes working on his computer and sees Ethan is locked\n on Ambrose's compound on his computer screen, thinking of Nyah.\n \n LUTHER (cont'd)\n She did it, Ethan. Nyah's in the\n compound.\n\n ETHAN\n Yeah? I've just rolled up a snowball and\n tosses it into hell.\n\n Ethan stands.\n\n OUTSIDE THE SHEEP FARM SAFEHOUSE\n\n A brooding Ethan exits the sheep farm safehouse under a setting\n sun.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n Now we'll see what chance it has.\n\n Ethan stops, looking out over the broken plain. His voice is\n heard overlapping into the next scene.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE (cont'd)\n (softly)\n Damn, You're beautiful.\n\n CLOSE - NYAH (NIGHT)\n\n lying in bed, obviously hearing Ethan's voice again, and feeling\n very much alone. She stares out into the night, a gaze that in\n its bemused intensity is an exact match to Ethan's.\n\n FADE:\n\n CLOSE - PHOTO - HONG KONG TIMES (INT. AMBROSE STUDY - EARLY DAWN)\n\n its front page, except for the headlines and date, covered with\n stacks of paper money, banded bundled dollars piled high as a\n cord of wood. The amount $24 millions is written in ink over the\n money.\n\n AMBROSE\n Twenty-four mil..\n\n Ambrose's hands shift to another photo of another newspaper, the\n LONDON TIMES, this one piled high with English pounds and the\n written amount: 37 million pounds.\n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE\n Thirty-seven million pounds. That's a\n promising bid.\n\n The third photo is of the AFTERNOON ARUBAN, with $14 million\n packaged on it.\n\n Ambrose, wearing a robe and seated at a glass-topped table, sets\n this last photo on the table on top the others. He picks up\n Nekhorvich's digital camera, removes the film disk, and snaps it\n into its plastic case. He places the case into an envelope\n (NOTE: The same envelope seen at the track) and hands it to\n Stamp.\n\n AMBROSE\n We'll need this at the track. Well then.\n Sorted.\n\n Stamp is seated near him. Glances toward Ambrose's bedroom and\n Nyah asleep in Ambrose's bed.\n\n STAMP \n (pointedly)\n Not everything. Why do you think she's\n really here?\n\n AMBROSE\n From her point of view or mine?\n\n STAMP\n Wasn't exactly gagging for it when she\n left you six months ago..The question is,\n do you trust her? \n\n As he speaks, Ambrose pulls a cigar case and a cutter out of his\n robe. Takes a cigar out of the case and clips the end of the\n cigar; the razor-sharp cutter decapitates the tip of the cigar \n like a guillotine.\n\n AMBROSE\n One considers her timing, of course -\n getting nicked within a week of the plane\n going down. Suggestive, even borderline\n suspicious, but hardly conclusive.\n\n STAMP\n Well, you've thorough about it, at any\n rate.\n\n Ambrose opens the cutter again to clean off the fragments of\n tobacco trapped by the cut.\n\n AMBROSE\n Tell me, Hugh. You don't exactly hang on\n Nyah's every word and gesture, do you?\n Fairly ratty nail, that.\n\n Sean touches the nail of Stamp's left pinkie finger. Stamp\n reacts by slightly withdrawing his hand.\n\n STAMP \n Sean..\n\n With his left hand Ambrose grabs Stamp's left wrist.\n\n AMBROSE\n You're not scrutinizing any casual shrug \n for some hair-splitting nuance, are you?\n\n STAMP\n Sean, please..\n\n Sean pulls Stamp's hand closer.\n\n AMBROSE\n Suppose she is some sort of Trojan horse\n sent in by IMF to spy in us, why should I\n deny myself the pleasure of a ride or two?\n Or don't you think I can learn more from\n her than she can from me?\n\n Ambrose twists Stamp's wrist so that Stamp drops to one knee\n trying to alleviate the pain.\n\n STAMP\n (in pain)\n I do!..\n\n Ambrose leans in close to Stamp's face as he places the cutter\n around Stamp's pinkie.\n\n AMBROSE\n Now Hugh, you must realize that some of us\n have the burden of sex to deal with..and\n my dear chap. I may or may not know why \n she thinks she's here, but I'm willing to\n take the risk, because Hugh, I am gaging\n for it..\n\n Ambrose closes the cutter on Stamp's finger and cuts the nail,\n just nicking the top of the finger and drawing blood. Stamp\n cries out. Ambrose tosses Stamp a napkin, light his cigar and\n exhale.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Don't ever question my judgment again.\n\n DISSOLVE:\n\n EMPTY FRAME (EXT. RANDWICK RACE TRACK - DAY)\n\n with no sound, the back stretch an unrecognizable blur until\n horses at high speed burst into the frame bringing with them the\n sight and sound of their great nostrils snorting and gasping for\n jostling and going to the whip, the sound of the crowd\n overwhelming all but the announcer's voice carrying everyone\n around the far turn and into the home stretch with a ringing,\n controlled frenzy.\n\n EXT - PRIVATE BLEACHER (DAY)\n\n Nyah and Ambrose rising as the horses cross the finish.\n \n AMBROSE\n (surprised)\n You won.\n\n NYAH\n (looking at her ticket)\n I suppose I did.\n\n AMBROSE\n What made you pick that nag? She'd never \n won a bloody thing.\n\n NYAH\n 'Thief in the Night?'\n\n AMBROSE\n Say no more. I'm off to grab a drink.\n Still favor Bellinis?\n\n She smiles, a little shakily. Ambrose leaves.\n\n A VOICE\n Naturally Vain..\n\n It's Billy passing behind her.\n\n NYAH\n Pardon me?\n\n BILLY\n 'Naturally Vain.' In the fourth.\n Check her out. She's due.\n\n Billy hands her a chest sheet and moves on. She opens it to the\n fourth race. Taped onto 'Naturally Vain' is a small plastic\n piece with the note. she regards the note, places the plastic\n piece in her ear.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n You can speak as if I'm right by your \n side.\n\n NYAH\n (picking up binoculars)\n Where are you?\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n At the mounting enclosure, just off the \n tracks at two o'clock.\n\n THRU BINOCULARS - NYAH'S POV - MOVING\n\n thru the crowd onto the track over to the pre-post paddock where\n an animated gaggle of owners, heavy batters and investerace touts\n surround it. Only Ethan is stock still - and looking up at Nyah.\n\n CLOSE - NYAH\n\n a swift intake of breath as she see him.\n\n ETHAN\n How's it going? Everything okay?\n\n NYAH\n Just like old times.\n\n ETHAN\n Just like old times?\n\n NYAH\n Just about..\n\n She appears to be the picture of unruffled sang-froid.\n\n ETHAN\n Tell me who you've run into at Ambrose's.\n\n ETHAN'S POV (THRU GLASSES)\n\n moving from Nyah to the champagne bar just behind where Ambrose\n is seen greeting someone in the crowd and they sit at a corner\n table in front of the window overlooking the track.\n\n NYAH\n (a breath, then:)\n Near as I can tell, there's at least a\n half-dozen other blokes about the place.\n Maybe more. Hugh Stamp, an old mate of\n Sean's, is the only one I recognize, bit\n of a creep and then some..\n\n POV ETHAN\n\n Stamp, stands a pillar, his finger bandages, looking\n glum and looking down at Nyah.\n\n ETHAN\n We know him. He's over your left\n shoulder, looking right at you as you go on..\n\n NYAH\n - Michael, his driver's an Aussie, new to\n me. Then there's the blokes in the\n annex at the back of the house.\n\n ETHAN\n Have you met them?\n\n NYAH\n Annex is strictly off limits to me and\n they never come to the main house,\n Michael even takes their meals to them\n all but shoves them under the door.\n\n ETHAN\n (looking into Champagne Bar)\n I've no doubt.\n\n ETHAN'S POV MONOCULAR VIDEO RANGE FINDER\n\n of Ambrose sitting with someone whose face is obscured from his\n angle by bar patrons.\n\n BILLY\n\n is also looking.\n\n POV RANGE FINDER BILLY\n\n and from his point of view it can be seen that Ambrose is talking\n with John McCloy, the head Biocyte. Ambrose takes an envelope\n out of his inner left jacket pocket and from it pulls out a small\n plastic container marked 'S.G.' (Identical to the object first\n seen in Nekhorvich's satchel at airport security.) He opens it\n and removes a small shiny object about the size of a quarter. He\n turns to the window and gestures. Stamp enters the bar.\n\n BILLY\n Ambrose is meeting some bloke in the bar.\n Big bloke, ginger hair. They're into\n something.\n\n ETHAN'S POV\n\n ETHAN\n I'll be damned. It's McCloy, the Biocyte\n CEO.\n\n LUTHER\n Nekhorvich's boss?\n\n ETHAN\n Yep.\n\n NYAH\n Ambrose has photographs of newspapers with\n loads of money piled on them -- thirty-\n seven million on the London Times. What's\n that about?\n\n ETHAN\n Bids from possible Chimera buyers -- to\n prove that as of the date on the newspaper\n those bids are back up by earnest money --\n\n INT - VAN - LUTHER\n\n is monitoring both cameras. All see Ambrose give the little\n wafer-like object to Stamp who places it in a small camera, hands\n it back to Ambrose and exits, waiting just outside the glass\n door. Ambrose hands the camera to McCloy who looks puzzled.\n\n LUTHER\n Looks like Ambrose is showing McCloy how\n to use a digital camera..\n\n McCloy puts it to his eye, fumbles, then with Ambrose's\n direction:\n \n ETHAN\n Whatever McCloy's looking at, he's not\n happy about.\n\n McCloy puts the camera down. The two men have words. McCloy\n shakily leave the table. Ambrose opens the camera.\n\n LUTHER\n Ambrose just pulled the memory card out of\n the digital camera and put it into an\n envelope, put it in his inner left jacket\n pocket...\n\n ETHAN\n Left jacket pocket?\n\n LUTHER\n Roger that.\n\n ETHAN\n Confirm. Left jacket pocket.\n\n LUTHER\n Left jacket pocket confirmed.\n \n ETHAN BY THE MOUNTING ENCLOSURE\n\n ETHAN\n Nyah, Ambrose is heading back. There's an\n enveloped inside --\n\n NYAH\n -- his left jacket pocket.\n\n ETHAN\n Affirmative.\n\n AMBROSE\n\n passes by Stamp on his way back, hands him the camera.\n\n NYAH\n (after a brief pause)\n Where do I meet you?\n\n ETHAN\n Betting table twelve off the paddock.\n Nyah, are you up to this?\n\n NYAH\n I'll muddle through.\n\n WIDE ANGLE - BLEACHER (DAY)\n\n Ambrose arriving with a pair of drinks. Nyah rises.\n\n AMBROSE\n See anything you like?\n\n NYAH\n Yeah. Naturally vain -- but they're about\n to close the betting table and I haven't a\n sou..\n\n While Ambrose is still juggling the drinks, Nyah reaches into his\n trouser pockets, and rummages around.\n\n AMBROSE\n (laughing)\n Nyah!\n\n ETHAN\n Billy, make sure Nyah's not followed.\n\n BILLY\n No worries, mate.\n\n She pulls out a fifty-dollar note.\n\n NYAH\n Would you mind terribly?\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n (amused and turned on)\n - not at all. But you'll pay for that\n and with interest..\n\n NYAH\n I've no doubt..\n\n She heads up the stairs.\n\n AMBROSE\n (reaching into his pocket for\n money)\n Hold on.\n\n Ambrose grabs her arm, and she almost drops the envelope she's\n just lifted. (NOTE: It is important not to see her actually lift\n it). She's holding it, pinned between her right arm and side. As\n it's slipping, she notes Stamp above her, looking down and has to\n conceal what she's holding from him as well:\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Put down a couple of hundred for.\n\n NYAH\n To win?\n\n AMBROSE\n What else?\n\n She takes it and as she does the envelope falls, but she manages\n to catch it with her left hand, blocking the move with her body\n as she does.\n\n WIDER ANGLE - NYAH\n\n moves along the aisle.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n Luther, smallest digital you got. Ready\n to transmit. Betting table twelve.\n\n EXT - VAN (DAY)\n\n designated as NEW SOUTH WALES DELIVERIES, 'anytime, anywhere.'\n Luther bursts out of the van, carrying the tiny camera and begins\n to thread his way thru cars and foot traffic.\n\n BILLY\n\n in dramatic contrast ambles at a conspicuously leisurely pace.\n\n NYAH\n\n passes Stamp, not seeing him standing just a row above, blocked\n from her by one of the pillars. Stamp idly regards her and then \n decides: he follows.\n\n LUTHER\n\n perspiring, approaches the betting table thru the last of the\n parked cars.\n\n STAMP\n\n approaches the door thru which Nyah had gone and starts to open\n it - only to have the door slammed in his face and on his\n bandaged finger by Billy, in a track usher's uniforms.\n\n BILLY\n (very solicitous)\n Sorry about that, mate, that must've\n really - aggrhh!..\n\n Even as Stamp winces in pain his arm has shot out and Billy finds\n himself pinned to the wall gasping for air. If he'd been welded\n there by a band of steal he'd have more room to maneuver.\n\n STAMP\n Say again?\n\n BILLY\n Aggrhh-aggrhh-aggrhh...\n\n STAMP\n Whatever you're about in future, watch\n your step. Never know who you might run\n into...\n\n Stamp looks around, Nyah's nowhere in sight. He's lost her. Sees\n his hand's bleeding and lets Billy go, who nearly drops to the \n floor.\n\n STAMP\n Where's the loo then?\n\n BILLY\n (pointing up)\n - aggrhh-aggrhh-aggrhh...\n\n Stamp heads up the men's room.\n\n BILLY\n (croaking it out)\n ...\n\n Shakes his head, feeling lucky to escape with his life.\n\n EXT - PADDOCK - BETTING TABLE TWELVE\n\n Nyah into shot. Stands in line. She looks around.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n How'd you do? Don't turn around.\n\n Nyah turns and looks Ethan dead in the eye.\n\n NYAH\n I managed.\n\n ETHAN\n You noticed. What're you going to do?\n Spank me?\n\n She slips Ethan the envelope. Ethan himself returns the look,\n holding it in spite of:\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Stamp's out of the loo.\n\n Luther arrives, with the camera, opening for Ethan. Nyah turns\n away. Ethan pulls out the tiny memory card, slips it in the \n camera.\n\n ETHAN (CONT'D)\n (looking into camera)\n This is going to take a couple of\n minutes..\n\n LUTHER\n\n is racing back to the van.\n\n LUTHER\n There in twenty, Ethan..\n\n NYAH AND ETHAN (IN LINE)\n\n edge toward the window.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Stamp's a little shaky, but headed your\n way, mate.\n\n ETHAN\n Copy that.\n (to Nyah)\n Who do you like? In the race?\n\n NYAH\n (nervous, she's heard Billy\n too)\n What race are we talking about?\n\n INT - VAN (DAY)\n\n A sweaty Luther:\n\n LUTHER \n I'm booted up. Go, Ethan.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n He's heading down the stairs, now..\n\n Ethan places the digital camera on play and begins to go thru the\n stills. As they cliff off, Ethan is visibly affected.\n\n LUTHER IN THE VAN\n\n watches the stills as well. He's no less affected.\n\n ETHAN WITH NYAH\n\n He mutters some expletive under his breath, then, evenly:\n\n ETHAN\n I want you out of Ambrose's place.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n He's one tier from the bottom.\n\n Ethan glances over to the bottom of the stairs.\n\n NYAH\n What are you talking about?\n\n As he lowers camera and removes the memory card.\n\n ETHAN\n I want you out of there.\n\n NYAH\n Why? What's happened. What did you see?\n\n BILLY\n Thirty steps..\n\n Slipping card back into envelope.\n\n ETHAN\n Nyah, you've done more than enough. Even\n the best of snake charmers get bit.\n\n NYAH\n Ethan, tell me -\n \n BILLY'S VOICE\n Twenty, nineteen..\n\n Ethan's been talking to someone he's been urging to walk, not run\n to the nearest exit. Now he drops all pretence:\n\n ETHAN\n I want you out of Australia!\n (more quickly)\n ..I don't know how much more plainly I can\n put it.\n\n NYAH\n How do you suggest I go about it?\n\n ETHAN\n He's touched your heart. You're\n overwhelmed. You need to think it over.\n You'll meet him somewhere in a month. If\n You're not out in 48 hours I'm coming in\n and getting you out. Give me the ear\n piece.\n\n She just gets it out of her hear and gives it to Ethan when she\n reaches the bookie who warns her to get down her bet. She gives\n him her money and gets the tickets just as the buzzer goes off -\n no more bets. Flustered by it she picks up her tickets but drops \n the envelope. She quickly kneels and scrambles to recover it,\n tucking it away and looking up - to see Stamp standing over her.\n almost exactly where Ethan had stood when she looked away.\n\n NYAH\n\n tries not to register alarm while she gauges how much Stamp had\n seen.\n\n STAMP\n Get your bet down?\n\n NYAH\n Just..\n\n She rises. Stamp waits only a moment then follows.\n\n AT THE PRIVATE BLEACHERS (DAY)\n\n everyone's on their feet, the horses are in the backstretch.\n\n Ambrose is watching the race through binoculars. Nyah comes up \n behind and puts her arms around him. With her left hand she puts\n the envelope into his right jacket pocket.\n\n AMBROSE\n Your nag is making a run for it on the\n outside!\n (lowering binoculars)\n Bloody hell, Nyah!\n\n She's momentarily startled. Then:\n\n AMBROSE (CONT'D)\n You picked another winner!\n\n NYAH\n Well, that's good, isn't?\n\n A BLOW UP (INT. SHEEP FARM IMF SAFEHOUSE - DAY)\n\n of a shot from a digital camera card.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n Dr. Segi Gradski, Nekhorvich's\n colleague and lifelong friend..\n\n The photos is coded with the data in the lower left hand corner,\n 01.27.99, the time in the right, 10:02:56 A.M. Burned into the\n photo is '20 hours, 03 minutes after exposure.'\n\n Ethan paunches in.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE (cont'd)\n Twenty hours and three minutes after\n exposure.\n (sotto voce)\n Twenty hours.\n\n Ethan doesn't say anything for a moment, then goes on to the next\n photo on the card: '25 hours, 40 minutes after exposure.' It's\n Gradski again. Gradski's eyes are darkly circled, his skull look \n mottled.\n\n ETHAN\n Six hours later.\n\n Another photo: '31 hours, 30 minutes after exposure.' Gradski's\n bleeding from nose, mouth and ears, the skin eruptions are\n pervasive, his body an open wound.\n\n ETHAN ( cont'd)\n Six more hours.\n\n The next photo. '34 hours, 25 minutes after exposure.' Gradski's\n body at rest.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Three hours after that, Gradski was dead..\n\n LUTHER\n Here's a victim from the Bruny Island\n outbreak.\n\n The victim's face shows a devastation undeniably like Gradski's.\n\n A long, long moment as Ethan, Luther, and Billy sit in silence.\n\n BILLY\n Oh, happy day.\n\n Ethan looks again at the first photo of Gradski.\n\n ETHAN\n Nekhorvich said 'However we travel, I\n must arrive at my destination within 20 hours\n hours of departure.'\n\n CLOSE - NYAH (EXT. AMBROSE VERANDA - LATE AFTERNOON)\n\n Nyah is on the balcony. Ambrose enters with two glasses of \n champagne. \n\n AMBROSE\n To Australia. It's made so many convicts\n feel at home. Here's hoping it does the\n same for you..\n\n He laughs. She doesn't.\n\n NYAH\n Sean, there's something I've been meaning\n to talk to you about... Isn't going to be\n easy for me to say.\n\n AMBROSE\n (jocular)\n Then don't say it.\n\n NYAH\n I don't know what to do about you, Sean.\n I'm more than a bit muddled. I need time.\n\n AMBROSE\n To do what?\n\n NYAH\n Sort it all out.\n\n AMBROSE\n And you're going to have time. There's\n been a change of plans.\n\n NYAH\n A change of plans?\n\n AMBROSE\n Yes. We won't be able to have dinner\n tonight. Something's come up. I hope you\n don't mind.\n\n NYAH\n Oh, no, not at all. Maybe just a bit.\n\n AMBROSE\n Ulrich will be about. He'll look after\n you.\n\n NYAH\n Lovely.\n\n INT - AMBROSE STUDY (LATE AFTERNOON)\n\n Ambrose enters, slips off his jacket and hangs it over a chair.\n He walks to a desk and brings up a computer the Biocyte website\n and McCloy infomercial. Stamp notes that Ambrose is \n on the computer and moves to the desk.\n\n STAMP\n I thought you were going to dinner.\n\n AMBROSE\n (pulling up something on the\n computer)\n Hugh, take care of the Nekhorvich memory\n card.\n\n STAMP\n Where is it?\n\n AMBROSE\n In the envelope in my pocket. My\n right.. jacket..pocket..\n\n Stamp leans over and pulls out the envelope. As he does he sees \n Ambrose has pulled up and started to play McCloy's informercial.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n (calmly)\n We've got an opportunity here. I'm not\n going to miss it..\n\n CAMERA CARD PHOTOS (INT. SHEEP FARM - ETHAN & CREW)\n\n a microscopic view of myriads of ugly green spiky objects amid\n exploding red ones..\n\n ETHAN\n Chimera attacking human blood..\n\n One more shot. A lavender stained group of spiky objects amid\n exploding the green ones.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Bellerophon attacking Chimera..\n\n On an adjacent screen is a frozen frame of McCloy looking thru\n the digital camera at the racetrack.\n\n BILLY\n Ambrose obviously got these from\n Nekhorvich on the plane.\n\n LUTHER\n What manic invents disease like that in\n the first place? Why would he do it?\n\n ETHAN\n I don't know, but Nekhorvich was not a\n manic. Get me a twenty on Nyah.\n\n LUTHER\n She must still be on the property.\n \n ETHAN\n I told her to get outta there.\n\n EXT - LIMO (EVE)\n\n McCloy gets in the rear of the limo and lights up a cigar. The\n limo takes off. another car pulls out and tags along behind the\n limo.\n\n INT - OTHER CAR (MOVING)\n\n Michael at the wheel.\n\n INT - LIMO - MOVING (EVE)\n\n McCloy doesn't like the taste of the cigar, goes to toss it out\n but the electronic window button doesn't work. He notices the\n evening paper partially open on the seat. His name leaps out. He\n opens the paper\n\n THE HEADLINES\n\n announce that John C. McCloy, CEO of Biocyte, Inc., one of the\n world's leading pharmaceutical companies, has died of a straight\n and terrible strain of influenza\n\n Shocked, McCloy drops the paper, calling out:\n\n MCCLOY\n George. George. George.\n\n The drover doesn't turn around. McCloy can't believe it. He\n bangs on chauffeur window. The driver turns on the air\n conditioning in the rear of the limo. McCloy clutches his throat\n and passes out.\n\n MCCLOY (INT. ICU UNIT - NIGHT)\n\n regains consciousness. He's got tubes coming out of every\n orifice and is contained in the equivalent of a plastic bubble.\n Drenched in perspiration and he looks around for a call button.\n He grips the side of the bed.\n\n MCCLOY\n Bloody room..just..shut your eyes, shut\n your eyes.\n\n He can't resist. Opens them to look up thru the plastic to see:\n\n NEKHORVICH\n\n a shimmering blur coming in and out of focus.\n\n MCCLOY (cont'd)\n I'll be buggered!..What's this then?\n\n\n NEKHORVICH\n A visit from an old friend.\n\n MCCLOY\n What's happening here? You're dead!\n\n NEKHORVICH\n Fatigued, certainly. But dead is a little\n extreme. On the other hand, when me dear\n Gradski had your pulse and blood pressure\n he has less than ten hours to live.\n\n MCCLOY\n (confused)\n It was in the bloody papers, on the\n telly..what's this about Gradski?\n\n NEKHORVICH\n You are infected with Chimera, my friend.\n\n INT - AMBROSE BEDROOM (NIGHT) NYAH\n\n is on the phone.\n\n NYAH\n International, please. I'd like to make a\n reservation on the next available flight tonight.\n\n OPERATOR\n Where to?\n\n NYAH\n Where is next available flight going?\n\n The operator answers.\n\n NYAH\n Fine. I'll take it.\n\n She hangs up, goes to the door. The house is eerily silent.\n\n POV - STAIRWELL (NIGHT)\n\n a play of shadows, the sound of the kitchen fridge.\n\n CLOSE - NYAH\n\n Moves softly downstairs & hesitates at bottom, glancing about.\n\n NYAH\n Ulrich?..Ulrich!...\n\n Silence. she goes into the kitchen. No one. She goes out the door.\n\n OVER NYAH'S SHOULDER - MOVING (EXT. SYDNEY - NIGHT)\n\n running pell-mell down to the shore. Stops. Looks outside the\n small skiff moored at the end of the dock. It's dark and she\n decides to chance it. She moves onto the pier, trying to glide\n by the boathouse. A figure darts out and grabs her. She tries to\n scream but can't. The figure whips her around and she sees:\n\n ETHAN\n Easy, easy, easy, shhh!\n\n NYAH\n Oh Ethan!..\n\n She throws her arms around him.\n\n ETHAN\n Are you okay?\n\n NYAH\n I am now. Get me out of here. Just get\n me out of here.\n\n ETHAN\n It's going to be okay.\n\n He holds her.\n\n INT - HOSPITAL ROOM\n\n McCloy's strapped down, but manages to reach the call button and\n push it. Again and again.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n No use, my friend. The medical staff\n wants no part of this. Doctors don't\n fancy the idea of dying any more than\n anybody else.\n\n McCloy stares at Nekhorvich for a long moment.\n\n MCCLOY\n How could I possibly be infected?\n\n Nekhorvich shrugs.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n That's exactly what Gradski said - 27\n hours before he died. With Chimera, the\n most minute exposure can be fatal.\n\n McCloy again looks at his vital sign on the monitor. He grips\n the edge of the hospital bed.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n But then you shouldn't be feeling to ill.\n not for another three of four hours \n anyway.\n\n McCloy breaks a fresh sweat in a sudden spasm of anxiety.\n\n MCCLOY\n You have Bellerophon.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n (mildly)\n Do I?\n\n MCCLOY\n You took it! All of it! And what if I need\n it?\n\n NEKHORVICH\n (amused)\n 'If?' My, my, my...the five hundred\n people on Bruny Island that you\n deliberately infected with Chimera needed\n it as well.\n\n MCCLOY\n Oh, please! How was I to know they had to\n be treated with Bellerophon within twenty\n hours?\n\n NEKHORVICH\n By asking me.\n\n MCCLOY\n You still don't get it, do you? You want\n to make an omelet, you break a few eggs -\n I needed to know just how bad the disease\n was - in the real world, not the lab. And\n you never know til you try. You thought\n you were genetically splicing together\n strains of influenza to create a \n cure for all influenzas. But I saw you\n creating a disease so terrible in Chimera\n that the cure would be priceless.\n\n NEKHORVICH\n You wanted the disease in order to peddle\n the cure.\n\n MCCLOY\n Well, the thought had occurred to me. I needed\n Chimera in order to peddle Bellerophon. For\n hero to be appreciated, you need a monster.\n Now that's not so difficult to understand, is\n it? Look, time was a shot of penicillin could\n knock off every bloody bug in the zoo! Not\n anymore!..have you any idea the R&D money it\n takes to float one little pissy boutique\n antibiotic that's barely effective against one\n strain of one bacterium? If I couldn't makes \n money killing the microscopic little shits that\n are out there, you'd help me put one out there\n I can make on!..there it is. I've\n confessed. I, John C. McCloy, am in business\n to make money. Lilly's making billions feeding\n Prozac to depressed dogs. Pfizer doesn't even\n know where to put the money they're making on\n Viagra, and let me tell you that shit didn't do\n a thing for me even at twice the recommended\n dose, Jesus, who do I have to screw to get a\n a break!..now get me out of here, get me treated\n and let's go back to work!..\n\n NEKHORVICH\n You know, I think it's a little late for\n that. Do give my regards to Gradski if\n you see him.\n \n INT - HALLWAY (OUTSIDE MCCLOY'S ROOM)\n\n Nekhorvich heaves a sigh and rips off a latex mask, and the vocal\n oscillator, revealing an exhausted Ethan. Angle widens to\n include Luther and Billy in hospital greens.\n\n Luther and Billy nod in disgusted assent.\n\n EXT - ANNEX (NIGHT) NYAH\n\n holds tight in her embrace with Ethan.\n\n NYAH\n Ethan, you know what frightens me most\n when I'm with him?..the thought of never \n seeing you..how are we getting out of here?\n\n ETHAN\n Nyah, it's very important not do\n anything to alarm Ambrose..\n\n NYAH\n What? You told me to get out of here. I\n thought you were here to collect me. I\n was so relieved.\n\n ETHAN\n (with growing urgency)\n No time to explain. You've done well,\n and we're so close. So close. It's\n critical that you do whatever Ambrose\n asks. Don't worry - it'll be over soon..\n That's a promise.. Come on, now off you\n go!\n\n He gives her an affectionate smile and she reluctantly heads back\n to the house, her expression troubled, even suspicious.\n\n INT - HALLWAY (OUTSIDE MCCLOY'S ROOM)\n\n Having just taken off the mask, Ethan stands with Luther and Billy.\n\n LUTHER\n (disgusted by what he's heard)\n So Ambrose has Bellerophon and McCloy's\n got Chimera.\n\n BILLY\n There guys are walking around with\n different halves of the same dollar bill?\n\n ETHAN\n Ambrose got Bellerophon from Nekhorvich\n on the plane, but he didn't get the Chimera\n virus.\n\n LUTHER\n Yeah. Why else would he come back to\n Australia? If he had them both, he could\n sell them anywhere.\n\n ETHAN\n I kill Chimera at Biocyte and he's sitting\n on a cure without a disease.\n\n LUTHER\n You've got the voice print, I'll get us in..\n\n EXT - AMBROSE HOUSE (NIGHT)\n\n Ethan enters and tears off his mask, revealing Ambrose filled\n with implacable rage. He looks up to see Stamp who's been\n obviously waiting for him. Tearing the voice oscillator.\n Leaning with both hands on a counter-surveillance monitor table\n he stares at the floor, his face rictus of hateful intensity.\n\n STAMP\n You were right. Hunt stung McCloy\n tonight. He knows. They'll be going into\n Biocyte...\n\n Ambrose looks up slowly to Stamp who's been standing by.\n\n AMBROSE\n Good..then we go where he'll be, don't \n we? Well done, Hugh. Well done.\n\n CHAUFFEUR'S WINDOW (INT. LIMO - EVE)\n\n being rapped on by the driver.\n\n MCCLOY \n\n wakes with a start. The window's lowered -- Billy's in livery.\n\n BILLY\n You're home, guv'ner. Home..\n\n It's taking time to register. Then:\n\n MCCLOY\n - where's George. My regular driver.\n Where is he?\n\n BILLY\n Took ill, guv'. Touch of the flu. They\n say it's going around. Nasty business.\n Mind you don't catch a chill now.\n\n Still dazed, McCloy manages to nod and exit the limo. Billy\n drives off.\n\n CLOSE - COMPUTER SCREEN - BIOCYTE BUILDING BLUEPRINTS\n (INT. SHEEP FARM SAFEHOUSE)\n\n including all specifications.\n\n ETHAN\n Luther, do you have the building up and\n running?\n\n Luther punches in and up comes a squat little island a hundred\n yards off shore, connected to the mainland by a wooden bridge.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n That's not exactly it.\n\n LUTHER\n Sorry, that it a Biocyte facility, their\n storage structure..\n\n ETHAN\n Nyah still on the property?\n\n BILLY\n She hasn't left it.\n\n Then:\n\n LUTHER\n Okay, here you go -\n\n As Luther speaks, the building - on his computer graphics, one\n with the BIOCYTE PHARMACEUTICALS ELEVATORS AND RENDERINGS, is\n being rapidly morphed to three dimension existence off the\n rendering specifications by Luther, as if the building itself\n were being constructed at a madly rapid pace, from its foundation\n to its reinforced steel structure, to its honeycombing of floors,\n to its outer skin. Luther's reconstitution of the building lot\n static, but moving around and above it even as he proceeds.\n\n ETHAN\n Let's start from the inside out.\n\n LUTHER\n All storage and production of Chimera is\n done here, in this lab on the forty-second\n floor, the heart of the building.\n\n BIOCYTE LAB\n\n Only about eight personnel -- chemists in lab coats, workers in\n bio-containment suits, etc. -- populate the lab, passing through\n security door and air locks, monitoring the virus stock, pading\n the injection gun, etc.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n Chimera itself is kept in two places: in\n production vials in an incubation room and\n housed in a small airtight chamber - inside\n three injection guns.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Mate, you kill it in both places, we're\n laughin' and we go home.\n\n WITH LUTHER AND ETHAN\n\n ETHAN\n Now how to get in there.\n\n LUTHER\n No garage entrance. Lobby's protected by \n five guards on rotating patrol.\n\n Ethan watches the rendition of the Biocyte lobby on screen\n\n CLOSE - AMBROSE (NIGHT)\n\n in overhead light, his eyes are dark pits, somehow underlying her\n saturnine intensity:\n\n AMBROSE\n If you look at Hunt's operational history, he\n invariably favors misdirection and deception.\n For a start he won't go into Biocyte from the\n ground where he has to risk confrontation\n with security.\n\n ETHAN \n Not going in from the ground. Show me the\n atrium.\n\n INT - BIOCYTE ATRIUM SHAFT\n\n The height and extent of the atrium are revealed, as well as its\n conclusion in a glass floor in the ceiling of the lab.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n (unhappily)\n The atrium? One of a kind. Runs down the\n center of the building. Provides 24-hour\n natural light via mirrors and daylight\n storage cells. Optimal growing conditions\n for the virus. Ends in a glass floor which\n doubles as part of the lab's ceiling.\n\n WITH LUTHER AND ETHAN\n\n Luther sees the glint growing in Ethan's eye.\n\n LUTHER\n Hey, atrium roof closes at sundown.\n\n EXT - BIOCYTE ATRIUM SHAFT\n\n As the sun sets, the louvers of the atrium roof begin closing.\n \n LUTHER'S VOICE\n And if the louvers are open for more than\n thirty seconds at night, the Civil\n Emergency alarms are tipped. Those even I\n can't stop. Thirty seconds total to get\n you in and the cable out.\n\n ETHAN\n Security?\n\n LUTHER\n Thirty-second opening in the roof and a\n 250-foot drop.\n\n ETHAN\n I'm not waiting 48 hours. When we're done\n at Biocyte, if she's not out of Ambrose's,\n I'm going in and getting her out.\n\n CLOSE - AMBROSE (NIGHT)\n\n AMBROSE\n No, Hunt will prefer to engage in some\n sort of acrobatic insanity to enter\n Biocyte somewhere through the atrium where\n security is minimal..\n\n Suddenly there's the roar of helicopter rotors.\n\n ETHAN (EXT. SYDNEY - NIGHT)\n\n is poised, upside down, on cable against the Sydney skyline.\n\n THE ATRIUM LOUVERS\n\n begin to open.\n\n WITH LUTHER (INT. VAN)\n\n hurriedly working the atrium's controls, hitting 'ENTER',\n repeatedly.\n\n INT - COPTER (HOVERING)\n\n BILLY\n Package away in five..four..three..\n two..one...\n\n LUTHER\n I'm not ready!\n\n ETHAN\n I'm gone..\n\n Ethan plummets towards the atrium.\n\n WITH LUTHER (INT. VAN - NIGHT)\n\n LUTHER\n (frantically working controls)\n C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!\n\n ETHAN'S DESCENT\n\n is so swift it appears as though he's going to hit the atrium\n louvers but as he reaches roof level they crack open just enough\n for him to dart thru like thread thru a needle\n\n Luther begins the countdown. His countdown continues, running\n under the action and dialogue below.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n ..nineteen..eighteen..seventeen...\n\n ETHAN IN MID-DESCENT (MOVING)\n\n moves down the shaft of bluish light, past the building's walls.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n (low)\n ..sixteen..fifteen..\n\n Ethan streaks thru the beams of light toward the atrium floor.\n\n INT - ATRIUM FLOOR - ETHAN \n\n reaches the end of the cord, slows himself to a stop and sees \n the security guard through the window. The guard starts as he \n catches a glimpse of Ethan's reflection in the control panels. \n\n ETHAN\n Luther, I'm looking at security. \n\n CLOSE - LUTHER\n\n LUTHER\n (utterly shocked) \n Oh. Uh. Commencing diversion. \n (sotto voce, typing swiftly) \n Alarm in cosmetics. \n\n INT - ATRIUM FLOOR \n\n Ethan swings himself up to the ledge above the guard's window, \n putting himself out of the puzzled guard's sight. \n\n LUTHER'S VOICE \n Gotta get that cable out. \n\n Ethan unhooks the cord and flips to the atrium floor. An alarm\n goes off. \n\n LUTHER'S VOICE (cont'd)\n There it goes.. \n\n Still confused and concerned, the guard doesn't immediately react \n to the alarm or the ringing phone. He finally answers the phone. \n\n GUARD #2'S VOICE \n (on phone) \n AY! what's the matter with you? Can't you \n hear the alarm's gone off in cosmetics? \n\n The first guard gives up what's confused him. \n\n GUARD \n (sarcastic) \n Right. Then I guess I'll have to trot off \n to see who's pinching eyeliner, won't I.\n (exits, grumbling) \n I'll even check the stairwell on the way. \n\n UP ANGLE - CABLE \n\n being swiftly retracted toward the atrium's opening as it closes. \n\n BILLY \n Retracting cable. \n\n LUTHER'S VOICE \n (low) \n Three..two..one.. \n\n UP ANGLE - ATRIUM \n\n The cable just makes it thru the atrium as the louvers close. \n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Cable's clear. \n\n INT - ATRIUM FLOOR - ETHAN \n\n reaches down and presses a silent beeper. \n\n WITH LUTHER (INT. VAN) \n\n sees a little red diamond-shaped light pop on his screen \n\n LUTHER\n Transponder activated..Reading package and \n Cable is clean. \n (exhaling, relieved) \n He's on his way. \n\n Staring at the buildings control panels.\n\n ETHAN (INT. ATRIUM) \n\n hugs the floor just out of sight of the befuddled security guard. \n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE \n He'll make the attempt at the only possible time \n for both of us, 11 P.M. - when the guards rotate\n and the buildings air-filtration generators go\n active, covering the sound of his break-in.. \n\n WITH LUTHER \n\n LUTHER \n Ethan, the generators are about to go active. \n We'll be out of contact for eleven minutes. \n\n CLOSE - GENERATORS \n\n dark and silent. \n\n GENERATORS \n\n turn over and roar to life. \n\n ETHAN AT BOTTOM OF ATRIUM\n\n cuts into the glass floor, pops it out, and drops thru the\n opening. None of it's heard under the generators.. \n\n Ethan drops onto the lab floor and heads across the lab and up\n the ramp to the hot zone. \n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE \n The frequency of the generators operate to \n our advantage - cutting radio \n communication from his team for the next \n eleven minutes.. \n\n INT - BIOCYTE LOBBY (NIGHT)\n\n Stamp, flanked by several of his team in Biocyte security guard \n uniform, crosses the lobby toward a pair of actual Biocyte \n security guards who appear more puzzled than alarmed at this\n unexpected influx.\n\n ONE OF THE GUARDS\n What's this, then? Reinforcements? \n\n STAMP \n Not exactly, mate. \n\n WITH LUTHER (INT. CONSTRUCTION VAN - NIGHT)\n\n His attention in drawn to a spot on the grid where Nyah's\n transponder blip, a circular yellow one in contrast to Ethan's,\n is moving. Troubled:\n\n LUTHER \n Billy. I think we got a problem. Nyah's\n on the wing. Up early. Billy, do you \n copy?\n\n INT - CHOPPER \n\n BILLY \n Exactly where is she? \n\n LUTHER \n ..in the building... \n\n BILLY'S VOICE \n Say again. Sounds like you're saying \n 'she's in the building.' \n\n LUTHER\n I am. She is.\n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE \n Ethan does it the hard way to avoid \n confrontation. Neutralizing security \n guards is simply too distasteful to him.. \n\n INT - BIOCYTE LOBBY \n\n The two guards who had greeted Stamp and his arriving team lie \n inert on the lobby floor. \n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE \n I've never found that a problem... \n\n WITH BILLY (INT. HELICOPTER - NIGHT) \n\n Billy's so surprised he momentarily gets loose with the copter \n and it banks off. As it and he recover: \n\n BILLY \n Right. Well, then. She's not likely to \n be alone. is she? \n\n LUTHER'S VOICE \n The question Is 'how many of 'em?' I \n can't get thru to Ethan. Not 'til the \n generators go off. \n\n BILLY \n When's that? \n\n LUTHER'S VOICE \n Not for another eight and a half minutes.\n\n WITH LUTHER \n\n staring at the red and yellow blips in vertical alignment, the \n Yellow one, Nyah, considerably below the red one, Ethan. \n\n INT - HOT ZONE ENTRANCE (NIGHT)\n\n The door reads. DANGER: LIVE VIRUS: INCUBATION ZONE. EXPOSURE IS\n FATAL. Ethan pulls on a protective mask from his pack and puts a \n miniaturized recorder up to the voice print activator:\n\n MCCLOY'S VOICE \n John C. McCloy.. \n\n Ethan's buzzed into the hot zone. He steps into the air locks. \n\n INT - SHEEP FARM IMF SAFEHOUSE\n\n A small bomb is placed by the dark gloves of someone unseen. \n\n EXT - CONSTRUCTION VAN - NIGHT \n\n a shadow falls across the dirt in front of the bumper. \n\n A SMALL OBJECT \n\n with a digital clock face, its red LED illuminating descending\n numbers, is carefully placed inside the bumper. The magnet on it\n doesn't quite catch. It's then placed more carefully. \n\n INT - CONSTRUCTION VAN \n\n Luther doesn't pick up on the faint metallic sound just outside. \n He's concentrating on the flashes on the screen showing the\n transponder rising in the building. Increasingly desperate:\n\n LUTHER \n It looks like Nyah's headed toward an \n elevator. \n\n ETHAN \n\n working meticulously an a computer monitor. \n\n DOWN ANGLE - ELEVATOR DOORS \n\n and a security guard's body lying in the corridor. A pair of \n trousered legs step over the body and into the elevator joining \n Nyah's legs and feet, and other pairs of trousered legs. The\n elevator doors close. \n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE\n If Hunt actually manages to squeak thru \n the atrium he's liable to make it to \n Chimera before we will.. \n\n CLOSE LUTHER \n\n On his computer screen the yellow dot continues its ascent, the\n two dots growing ever closer. \n\n LUTHER \n She's in the elevator heading toward Ethan. \n\n BILLY'S VOICE \n How much longer before you can reach him? \n\n LUTHER\n Five and a half minutes. \n (looking at his chronometer) \n He's breached the hot zone.. \n\n AMBROSE'S VOICE \n On the other hand we know where Hunt will \n be and he doesn't know we're coming..\n\n INT - INCUBATION ZONE\n\n In front of each of three large television monitors is a vial\n shaped roughly like a sealed beaker somewhere between one and two\n liters in size. Each one is contained behind Plexiglas and each \n one pale yellow, one sunset red. Behind them are monitors marked,\n respectively: WORKING SEED STOCK, MASTER SEED STOCK, IN VITRO\n VIRUS. Behind these is a monitor screen with a blow-up of the\n contents of the vials & the magnitude of the blow-up - 950,000x.\n\n These are X-Ray microscope blow-ups, i.e., allowing the viewer to\n see the motility of the virus and its metabolism, not dissimilar\n to an MRI this of Chimera in its three different cultures..\n\n Ethan's on the computer controls, racing thru to WORKING SEED\n STOCK, which calls for optimal levels of 6.9 pH and 11 \n degrees Celsius. He drops the pH to zero and punches up the\n temperature to a hundred. The effect on the greenish hue in\n the bottle is subtle but immediate - not so subtle is the\n effect on the virus seeds viewed microscopically - they\n immediately appear agitated, their microscopic DNA innards\n contracting and expanding.\n\n Ethan moves on to the Master Seed Stock and the In Vitro Virus\n panels on the computer. The changes he makes are reflected on\n the digital monitoring panels before each viral container.\n\n THE WORKING SEED\n\n vial has begun to change colors from sea green to a paler pea-\n green. The liquid itself begins to thicken:\n\n COMPUTER VOICE\n (female)\n Alert. Chimera-working-seed-stock-pH-and-\n temperature-level-outside-optimal range.\n\n As the liquid grows more viscous the X-Ray have a progressively\n more difficult time penetrating the individual cells, resulting\n in a low humming sound which grows as the liquid gels.\n\n ETHAN\n\n at the control panels for maintaining the virus.\n\n ANOTHER COMPUTER VOICE\n Alert. Chimera-master-seed-stock-pH-and-\n temperature-level-outside-optimal range.\n \n FIRST COMPUTER VOICE\n Alert. Chimera-working-seed-stock-pH-at-\n unacceptable-level..\n\n THIRD COMPUTER VOICE\n Alert. Chimera-in-vitro-pH-and-\n temperature-level-outside-optimal range..\n\n FIRST COMPUTER VOICE\n Alert. Chimera-working-seed-stock-pH-at-\n critical-level. Alert. Stock-life\n threatened. Alert.\n\n The X-Ray microscope shows the individual seed-cells sticking\n together, some exploding, then all movement ceasing. The Liquid\n itself is suddenly shod thru fluorescent sparks before it\n congeals to an opaque mush.\n\n FIRST COMPUTER VOICE (cont'd)\n Alert. Chimera stock life..terminated..\n\n Simultaneously with the seed stock, Ethan's damaging both the\n working seed in-vitro virus.\n\n WIDE ANGLE - HOT ZONE\n\n Ethan places a little plastique on a timer and runs up a ramp to\n the decontaminant air lock at the back entrance to the hot zone.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n How're we doin', then?\n\n LUTHER\n He should've have killed the virus in the\n incubation area..Nyah's exited the\n elevator on the same level as the lab.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n What can we do' mate?\n\n LUTHER\n (staring at them)\n Hope he kills all the bugs before the \n yellow dot gets to the red one.\n\n CLOSE - LUTHER'S SCREEN\n\n The read and yellow blips are now on the same plane. The yellow\n dot moves toward the red one as if drawn by a slow motion magnet.\n\n DOWN ANGLE - ETHAN\n\n looking up as his entire body is hit with air like he's a wind\n tunnel. When the air flow ceases, a green light goes on.\n\n COMPUTER VOICE\n Subject is contaminate free. Zero contaminate\n factor. Subject contaminate free.\n\n ETHAN - GLASS OBSERVATION ROOM\n\n heads up a ramp to the three injection guns. Hands in gloves he\n reaches into the chamber for one of the injection guns.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n He's still got three injection guns in the\n test lab..They're loaded with doses of\n Chimera which he'll destroy by firing\n into a hyper-thermal chamber.\n\n He places the barrel of the gun, seals the chamber, and fires.\n There's a tiny flash of light. Ethan withdraws the gun.\n\n INT - CONSTRUCTION VAN\n\n Luther's sweating it as the clock counts down: :30, :29, :28..\n\n LUTHER\n - twenty-seven, twenty-six, twenty-five,\n come on, Ethan we're almost there! I-I'm\n off sensitive for this..\n\n In a spasm of anxiety Luther bolts to his feet, wipes his brow.\n\n LUTHER (cont'd)\n - eighteen seconds, the generators'll be\n off and Ethan's back on line..\n\n Luther glances thru the van window only to see reflected in the\n van side mirror:\n\n MIRROR REFLECTION - CHROME BUMPER (EXT. CONSTRUCTION VAN)\n\n reflected in it is the face of a digital clock, its red LED\n illuminating the clock's numbers fourteen - thirteen - twelve -\n\n WITH LUTHER\n\n LUTHER\n (realizing what he's in for)\n Oh - oh - oh -\n\n Even as he moans he's frantically ripping out the computer and\n cords dangling, hotfoots toward the van exit.\n\n INT - HOT ZONE - GLASS OBSERVATION ROOM\n\n Ethan fires the second injection gun. Picks up the third and\n last. He pauses as he's about to fire it, staring intently\n suddenly the gun is held by:\n\n NEKHORVICH\n\n who turns the barrel from the hyper-thermal chamber and releases \n into his wrist.\n\n BACK TO ETHAN - GLASS OBSERVATION ROOM\n\n whose vision of of Nekhorvich fades. Still thinking of Nekhorvich he\n continues to stare at the gun for another moment and before he can fire:\n\n INT - SHEEP FARM IMF SAFEHOUSE\n\n The bomb's LED readout shows 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.. As it reaches 0\n a small light on the bomb suddenly stops its incessant blinking.\n\n EXT - VAN\n\n explodes. Saw horses and dirt fly.\n\n INT - GLASS OBSERVATION ROOM - ETHAN\n\n looks up just in time to see Ambrose and team arrive at the far \n end of the lab. They immediately open fire, shattering the\n room's walls and the glass injection gun chamber. As the\n injection gun begins falling to the lab floor below, one of\n Ambrose's team runs to grab it, but before he can reach it he is\n shot by Ethan, who's falling to the floor below.\n\n AMBROSE\n (to Ulrich)\n Get it.\n\n As Ethan hits and dives for cover, Ulrich goes for the gun\n Ethan shoots Ulrich in the leg. Ulrich hops back in pain.\n\n AMBROSE\n Those were two explosions, your van and\n your safehouse, in case you didn't hear\n them both -- I believe that means you've\n also lost a friend.\n\n Ethan's crouching on the ground protected behind a series of\n vertical metal sheets.\n\n ETHAN\n And you couldn't walk to tell me about it.\n\n Ethan moves to pick up the injection gun which lies in the\n shattered glass on the floor. Ambrose, Wallis, and a couple of\n other Ambrose team members fire, kicking up broken glass. Ethan\n backs off.\n\n AMBROSE\n (yelling)\n Hold your fire, dammit!\n\n The two spot one another in a mirror on the far wall of the hot\n zone..\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Well, Hunt. How've you been?\n \n ETHAN\n (smiling)\n Fight a bit of a cold..\n\n AMBROSE\n And you're happy about that?\n\n ETHAN\n Beats fighting the flu, I'm here to tell\n you.\n\n AMBROSE\n You know, that was the hardest part of\n having to portray you. Grinning like an\n idiot every fifteen minutes.\n\n ETHAN\n I would've thought the hardest part was\n exercising restraint. Curbing that\n pressing need of your to get your gun \n off. You were in such a hurry to knock\n off that 747, you never figured out where\n the virus really was.\n\n AMBROSE\n I knew where it was.\n\n ETHAN\n Oh. then you knew the only way \n could smuggle the live virus to the CDC\n scientists in Atlanta was by injecting\n himself and using his own bloodstream as a \n Petri dish, doing it inside of twenty\n hours so he could take the anti-virus and\n still have it be effective. You knew that\n while you were knocking him off and\n destroying the very thing you came for.\n\n Ethan has been using this exchange to ease a fresh seventeen\n round clip into his weapon and he punctuates this last with a\n spray of gunfire, attempting to cover his own effort to the reach\n the injection gun. The return fire nearly hits the injection\n gun, kicking up glass and dust and making it move around on the\n floor.\n\n AMBROSE\n Stop! Put a sock in it! Hit that bloody\n gun and you'll spray the bloody virus all\n over the place!\n\n Everybody's regained cover but the injection gun remains out of\n everybody's reach.\n\n ETHAN\n There it is, guys, the last of it.\n\n AMBROSE\n Yep. You've provided us with a golden\n opportunity to have both the bug and the\n bug killer.\n\n ETHAN\n What was the top bid?\n\n AMBROSE\n Why, you going to make me a better offer?\n\n ETHAN\n Than thirty-seven million pounds? Not\n really.\n\n AMBROSE\n (not amused)\n Somebody's been slipping you our mail.\n Come on out here, you bad girl.\n\n Nyah walks out into view on her own. Ethan sees her reflection in\n the mirror. Enraged, but trying to control it.\n\n ETHAN\n She doesn't belong here, Sean. Let her go.\n\n AMBROSE\n She wouldn't be here if it wasn't for\n you, Hunt. from this moment you're\n responsible for what happens to her, and\n if you're looking out for her well-being,\n I suggest you advise her to pick up the\n gun and bring it to me. Ball's in your\n court, Hunt. What've you got to say?\n Nyah's waiting for your answer.\n\n A pregnant pause.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n (breaking through the static)\n Ethan, Nyah's in the building! Do you \n copy?\n\n WITH LUTHER (EXT. BIOCYTE)\n\n a mess amid the rubble of the construction van.\n\n ETHAN\n\n ETHAN\n (dryly)\n Thank you.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n Sure he won't shoot you the minute he's\n got it?\n\n AMBROSE\n Oh, Hunt, please! One can't hold Nyah\n responsible for her actions..\n\n ETHAN\n In other words, you're calling her a\n flake.\n\n CLOSE - NYAH\n\n listening.\n\n AMBROSE\n You know women, mate. Like monkeys, they\n are. Won't let go of one branch til\n they've got a grip on the next...get it,\n Nyah. I'll cover you.\n\n Ambrose cocks his weapon.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n I'm waiting.\n\n NYAH\n (not much more than body\n length from Ethan)\n This isn't exactly working out the way you\n thought it would, Ethan. Sorry.\n\n Finger on the injection trigger, she rises and turns the barrel\n on her arm, firing. The sound of the air pressure pushing the\n virus into her is unmistakable, as is the circle of tiny puncture\n wounds on her skin. Nyah moves in front of Ethan, covering him,\n as she turns to face Ambrose.\n\n ETHAN\n\n shocked by Nyah's gesture but as she addresses Ambrose he\n resets the 'Countdown' on his chronometer to twenty hours. As\n it drops into the nineteen:\n\n AMBROSE\n (frustrated in the extreme)\n You..bitch!\n\n She's been laughing away with Ethan:\n\n NYAH\n You're not going to shoot, Sean. Not\n this bitch. She's worth thirty-seven\n million pounds.\n\n CLOSE - ETHAN'S HANDS\n\n fingers press a red button on a tiny detonator. There's a bright\n heat flash from the hot zone and an explosion of gas and water --\n the plastique killing any airborne virus.\n\n Ethan uses the diversion to grab Nyah and run with her to the far\n side of the lab, behind a stock of horizontal cylinders.\n\n INT - LAB\n\n Ambrose and team recover from the explosion and begin firing on\n the tanks protecting Ethan and Nyah, surrounding the two with\n fire and jets of released steam.\n\n INT - LAB - ETHAN AND NYAH\n\n behind the stack of tanks. Ethan launches an explosive down a\n short hallway, blowing a hole in the building's exterior wall.\n\n INT - ENTRANCES TO THE LAB\n\n A group of Biocyte security guards enter from behind Ambrose and\n team and catch them off-guard. All hell breaks loose.\n\n INT - LAB - ETHAN AND NYAH\n\n ETHAN\n (outraged)\n What did you think you were doing!\n\n NYAH\n I wasn't thinking! Just..trying to keep\n you from getting hurt, that's all.\n\n This hits Ethan with the force of a blow.\n\n ETHAN\n - you who don't have a conscience.\n\n NYAH\n (something of surprise to\n her)\n I guess I lied..You can't get both of us \n out of here, can you?\n\n ETHAN\n No.\n\n NYAH\n Then you'll have to kill me before it's\n too late. Before I start killing people.\n\n ETHAN\n No.\n\n NYAH\n I'm infected with Chimera. You know you\n don't have a choice. Just do it now.\n\n She puts Ethan's gun to her forehead.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n For god's sake, get it over with.\n\n THE HAMMER\n\n pulls back.\n\n CLOSE - ETHAN\n\n He can't fire, lower the hammer.\n\n ETHAN\n We've got 19 hours and 57 minutes before\n you start killing anybody. I'll get \n Bellerophon into your system by then.\n Just stay alive. I'm not gonna lose you.\n\n Ethan runs from the cover of the tanks toward the exploded wall\n once in the open, he exchanges direct gunfire with Ambrose's\n team, wounding a couple men. He reaches the wall and dives thru,\n camera with him as he drops 25 stories, the sound of gunfire in\n the air all around him.\n\n Less than a hundred feet from the ground a small dark chute\n deploys and Ethan is lost from view beneath it.\n\n PANNING SHOT - PAINTINGS (INT. CULTURAL ARTIFACT CENTER)\n\n of Aborigine paintings, eerie patterns made of man and nature\n phantasmagorical, like the patterns that form under the eyelids\n shortly before sleep. B.G. the haunting notes of didgeridoo\n insure they're not being overheard.\n\n SWANBECK\n (reading the paintings titles)\n 'Dreaming of Birds and Flying Fox,'\n 'Bushfire Dreaming,' 'Wind Dreaming,' --\n oddly appropriate -\n\n Swanbeck breaks off and turns to a somewhat battered and battle\n weary Ethan:\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n - since it appears that Chimera, the\n mother of all nightmares is on the loose\n somewhere around here - is there any way\n this disaster can be viewed as a qualified\n one?\n\n ETHAN\n (tight-lipped)\n Not yet. We did manage to pull any\n sensitive equipment and material out of\n our safehouse wreckage.\n\n SWANBECK\n We could lock down passport control and\n all ports of authority, but that won't\n stop Ambrose, and beyond him, we don't\n know who else we're looking for -- all \n terrorist bank accounts of which we're\n aware are stable. No deposits, no\n withdrawals. Therefore no suspects.\n\n ETHAN\n We think we've got our finger on the \n buyer.\n\n SWANBECK\n Do you? Even assuming you're able to\n prevent Ambrose selling Chimera, you've\n now got an additional problem. You\n destroyed all of Chimera at Biocyte. If\n Ambrose is going to sell Chimera now,\n he'll have to do it by taking a pint or so\n of Miss Hall's blood to market.\n\n ETHAN\n Yes, I believe that's right.\n\n SWANBECK\n But that leaves another seven or eight\n pints of Chimera.\n\n ETHAN\n You mean that leaves Miss Hall.\n\n SWANBECK\n Yes, I believe that's right. Now my\n understanding is that 20 hours after\n exposure, the victim becomes infectious.\n Highly infectious.\n\n Ethan glances at his chronometer. Swanbeck sees it.\n\n SWANBECK (CONT'D)\n You noted the time of exposure?\n\n Ethan nods.\n\n SWANBECK (CONT'D)\n - good. Then if you manage to get hold of\n Ambrose, and obtain what he's got, you've\n got -\n (glancing at the chronometer)\n - 8 hours 57 minutes and twenty-three\n seconds to destroy the largest remaining\n source of Chimera on earth.\n\n ETHAN\n She sacrificed herself..\n\n SWANBECK\n Brave girl. If you can get hold of\n Bellerophon with the time limit, you may\n spare her the ultimate sacrifice. But in\n either case you've got less than nine\n hours to kill her or cure her. After that\n it's out of our hands and a matter of\n worldwide material law. And Hunt. However\n you obtain it, we want you to preserve a\n sample of Chimera. Bring it back alive.\n\n Ethan's staring at Swanbeck.\n\n SWANBECK (CONT'D)\n Something else?\n\n ETHAN\n Aren't you even curious? About why she\n did it?\n\n SWANBECK\n No. I can't afford to be curious. And\n neither can you, Hunt..\n\n As the eerie wail of the didgeridoo seems to mount in volume and\n intensity, the overcast sky filtering into the loft seems\n particularly oppressive. Ethan's up against it and he knows it.\n\n A VIEW OF SYDNEY\n\n from harbors to skyline in all its sunlight splendor.\n\n Nyah sits for a moment, looking steadily at Ambrose. Ambrose pats\n the cannister he's carrying.\n\n AMBROSE\n Feel like pleading for your life?\n\n NYAH\n (with an edge)\n Not as much as you feel like hearing it.\n\n Ambrose slaps her. With scarcely a flicker of hesitation she\n slaps him back.\n\n AMBROSE\n God damn it, Nyah! Why did you do it? Why\n did you save that bastard?\n\n NYAH\n If it'll make you feel any better I won't\n do it again.\n\n It doesn't. Full of pain and rage, he gets out of the car.\n\n AMBROSE\n If it'll make you feel any better, you're\n going to take a lot of Aussies with you\n and make me a lot of money.\n\n NYAH\n What are you talking about?\n\n AMBROSE\n In just a few hours you can be assured of\n going down in history as the typhoid Mary\n of Oz. G'day.\n\n A nameless guard from Michael's car idling nearby gets into the\n back seat with Nyah. Ambrose shuts the car door in Nyah's face,\n gets in Michael's car takes off.\n\n EXT/INT - IMF HELICOPTER - BLUFF\n\n ETHAN\n Luther?..Luther.\n\n Luther drops a tiny part into his computer board and, as he tries\n to fish it out with the aid of a magnifying glass:\n\n LUTHER\n Ethan, I keep telling you there's not a \n chance of locating Nyah til I access the\n satellite and there's not a chance of\n doing that til I get this thing booted up\n and running! How much time does she have left?\n\n ETHAN\n Ninety-seven minutes, twenty-seven\n seconds.\n\n BILLY\n Before we kill her or cure her..\n\n LUTHER\n Right.\n\n ETHAN\n Wrong. All we've got to worry about is\n Ambrose. Nyah will take care of Nyah.\n\n BILLY\n What are you talking about?\n\n ETHAN\n Unless we dose her with Bellerophon on the\n next ninety-seven minutes, Nyah will kill\n herself. So, first things, first.\n Swanbeck said there's no cash movement\n from any monitored terrorist accounts.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND CAR PARK\n\n McCloy's black limousine is in the car park.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n Confirms what Ambrose is gonna do -\n\n INT - TUNNEL - BEAR ISLAND\n\n Barrels of toxic materials line the walls, as an armed guard \n patrols the corridor, leading into the main chamber, where we\n follow McCloy into\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE\n\n McCloy enters and begins pacing.\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE (CONT'D)\n - who he's doing it with, and where he's\n gonna do it.\n\n EXT - MOTORCYCLE AND LINE OF VEHICLES (DAY)\n\n speed along an isolated road in close formation before turning\n onto a side road, revealed as leading to a bridge across a small\n strip of water to a small island.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND - LANDWARD SIDE (DAY)\n\n As the cycles and vehicles cross the bridge and approach the\n front gate, the camera swings around the side of the island\n establishing the geography and the six cannon emplacements\n before coming to a stop on\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND - SEAWARD CLIFF - ETHAN\n\n scaling the seaward side of the island with minimal gear\n\t\t\t\n EXT/INT - IMF HELICOPTER - BLUFF\n\n resting like a giant locust, half hidden by a cluster of trees on\n the bluff overlooking Bear Island.\n\n Billy's at the controls, with binoculars, maintaining\n surveillance of the island and environs.\n\n In the back, Luther is at Work on his GPS computer.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Ethan's out from under the bridge and on\n the south-east face..\n\n EXT - CLIFF/VIEW OF TUNNEL\n\n Ethan climbs the side of the cliff. \n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n Ethan, Ambrose and his tem have\n over the bridge -\n\n ETHAN\n Copy that.\n\n Ethan reaches the clifftop and sees armed guards patrolling.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n You all right, mate? From here it looks\n like very security. What's it look like \n like from there?\n\n ETHAN\n Risky.\n\n He's over the top and moves swiftly to cover.\n\n Ethan surprises and kills a perimeter guard, then runs to a\n length of grating and lifts one of the panels.\n\n Ethan climbs down through the grating in the roof of the tunnel.\n Using a bar to swing down, he breaks a second guard's neck and\n drops to the floor.\n \n EXT - BEAR ISLAND - ENTRANCE (DAY)\n\n Ambrose and team drive through the entry gate -- passing its\n BIOCYTE PHARMACEUTICALS sign and various no-nonsense warnings of\n 'No Trespassing,' etc. -- before Biocyte security guards close it\n behind them.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - NEAR THE GRATING\n\n ETHAN\n Breached the structure at the ten o'clock\n grating. In the tunnel moving toward the\n target.\n\n Ethan begins heading down the tunnel.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE BUILDING\n\n Ambrose and team enter, where McCloy and his CHEMIST and\n ACCOUNTANT are waiting. As Stamp stands back, observing, and\n Wallis sets up a laptop, Ambrose walks up to a refectory-like\n table and stands opposite McCloy. Ambrose reaches into his coat\n and puts two cannisters on the table in front of McCloy. McCloy's\n chemist picks up the cannisters and inserts them into two\n chambers connected to his microscope.\n\n CHEMIST\n It's a DNA match. The blood's loaded with\n Chimera.\n\n An insert of the microscope plate shows the two samples, as\n Bellerophen destroys Chimera.\n\n The chemist presses a button on the chamber and there's a heat\n flash. The chamber red light moves to green, and there's a \n mechanical voice: 'Substance destroyed.'\n\n CHEMIST (cont'd)\n And they certainly have Bellerophen.\n\n The Kev cannister is out on the table.\n\n MCCLOY\n Well, then. You've got both the virus and\n the anti-virus, Chimera and Bellerophen.\n Which means I've thirty million for\n you\n\n Ambrose doesn't respond.\n\n MCCLOY (cont'd)\n That's all the cash I can come up with\n\n AMBROSE\n Not exactly. Wallis?\n\n WALLIS\n (off Biocyte figures on laptop)\n More like two-two point two million.\n\n AMBROSE\n In any case we don't want your cash.\n\n MCCLOY\n Then what do you want?\n\n Ambrose picks up a mobile phone and dials.\n\n AMBROSE\n Stock, Mr. McCloy. Stock options, to be a\n little more precise..\n (into the phone)\n - cut her loose..right in the center of\n town..the more crowded the better..\n (punching off, to McCloy)\n How quickly can you manufacture more of\n the antivirus.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - CAVITY IN THE WALL\n\n As he moves along the tunnel, Ethan suddenly flattens himself\n against a wall as he receives a transmission from Luther.\n \n LUTHER'S VOICE\n Ethan, just picked up an Ambrose call -\n Nyah's been dropped off. I think she's\n alive.\n\n ETHAN\n Where is she?\n\n EXT - HELICOPTER - BLUFF\n\n LUTHER\n Somewhere in Sydney.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - CAVITY IN THE WALL\n\n Ethan hears something and ducks into a nearby cavity in the\n tunnel wall. As a guard approaches, Ethan steps out of the\n cavity and knocks the guard out, then throws him into the\n opposite wall.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n Ethan? Do you copy?\n\n ETHAN'S VOICE\n 'Somewhere in Sydney?' Care to harden the\n target?\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n Can't. Until I can get the GPS up on our\n computer..it's still down..\n\n ETHAN\n The clock is ticking..\n\n Back to the matter at hand, Ethan completes the move on the \n guard and knocks him out.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE\n\n MCCLOY\n Bellerophen? No time at all once I've got it.\n\n AMBROSE\n Good. Biocyte stock is just a week or two\n away from going through the roof.\n\n MCCLOY\n (alarmed)\n What are you talking about?\n\n AMBROSE\n An outbreak of Chimera.\n\n MCCLOY\n Where?\n\n AMBROSE\n In downtown Sydney for a start.\n\n McCloy is stunned.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n You create the supply, Mr. McCloy, we've\n just created the demand. Three million \n people in Sydney and 17 million people in\n Australia are going to need Bellerophen\n within a matter of days..not to mention\n the rest of the world..\n\n INT - TUNNEL - OPEN AREA - ETHAN'S FEET\n\n stealthily approach a couple dozen jittery pigeons, cooing\n and pecking. The intensity of their noise-making increases\n as Ethan reaches them.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - OUTSIDE OF THE SLABHOUSE ROOM DOORS\n\n Hearing the disruption of the pigeons, one of Ambrose's\n guards leaves his post at the double doors and head the \n tunnel toward the birds to investigate.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - OPEN AREA\n\n Ambrose's guard draws his gun and continues approaching the\n pigeons. Before the guard can see him, Ethan runs forward, and\n sends the pigeons into scattered flight, blinding the guard.\n Ethan jumps into a back flip and double kicks -- first knocking\n away the guard's gun and then knocking him out and flat on his\n back. Ethan continues his flip and lands right back on his feet.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE\n\n AMBROSE\n -- now here's the way it's going to\n work..Wallis, the shares outstanding are..\n\n WALLIS\n Ninety-three point four million.\n\n AMBROSE \n Which means, Mr. McCloy, we have to get\n our hands on four hundred and eighty\n thousand options. We'll borrow your\n thirty million to buy those options. Your\n stock's never sold above thirty-one\n dollars a share. We'll agree to buy at\n fifty. \n\t\t\t\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n When your stock goes north of two hundred, \n and it will, those options will be worth \n billions. We can borrow whatever we need \n to buy the 48,000,000 shares, fifty-one \n percent of Biocyte.\n\n MCCLOY\n Outrageous. I won't let you take control\n of my company.\n\n AMBROSE \n Sit down. You'll be a billionaire. Better\n than being broke. I've got terrorists and\n other pharmaceutical companies standing in\n line. Ball's in your court, Mr. McCloy.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - OUTSIDE THE SLABHOUSE ROOM DOORS\n\n Ethan pulls a can of explosive material form his pack. He\n rolls it towards the double doors, and it stops just before\n reaching them. Then, pointing his gun to the ceiling, he \n fires into the air.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE ROOM - AMBROSE\n\n hears a noise and looks to Stamp, who heard it as well.\n Stamp nods to two guards to check it out. They head across\n the room to the double doors.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - OUTSIDE THE SLABHOUSE ROOM DOORS - ETHAN\n\n waits for the right moment before raising his and firing\n at the can of explosives. Just as it ignites, the guards\n open the doors and are blown back by force of the explosion.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE ROOM - AMBROSE\n\n reacts and turns toward the explosion. Amidst the flames and \n debris, a single white dove comes flying into the room. And\n beyond it, Ambrose can see Ethan Hunt in silhouette walking\n slowly past the doorway.\n\n AMBROSE\n Run that bastard down.\n\n Orders are shouted, and guards, along with Stamp, hotfoot it down\n the tunnel-corridor in the direction of the explosion.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - STAMP AND GUARDS\n\n run down the tunnel. The guards move commando-style, directed\n by Stamp's hand signals.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE - MCCLOY AND AMBROSE\n\n Ambrose loads his gun and drags the tip of the barrel along the\n table.\n\n AMBROSE\n We're running short on time, Mr. McCloy.\n We've got to conclude our business.\n\n McCloy pauses only a moment before nodding to his accountant.\n\n MCCLOY\n Yes, start the transfer.\n\n The accountant begins working on his laptop.\n\n AMBROSE\n (to Wallis)\n Follow it. Let me know.\n\n INT - TUNNEL - STAMP AND GUARDS\n\n pass a couple of doorways. A pigeon flies past Stamp's face and\n he stops. As he turn, Ethan Lowers himself from a hiding place\n in the ceiling. Stamp and Ethan pull their guns on one another.\n They're in a face-off until they both agree to drop their guns,\n but Stamp catches his in mid-air and points it back at Ethan.\n\n ETHAN\n You broke our deal.\n\n STAMP\n You're too trusting. Raise your hands\n slowly.\n\n As Ethan raises his hands, he pulls the pin on a grenade and then\n kicks it between Stamp's legs. The handle flies off: It's live.\n When Stamp looks down in surprise at the grenade, Ethan kicks out\n his gun.\n\n Trying to escape the grenade, Stamp smashes into Ethan and seems\n to have hit him in the jaw. Both hit the ground as the grenade\n explodes, with Stamp appearing to have the upper hand.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE\n\n As everyone waits for the transfer to complete, the grenade\n explodes out in the tunnel. McCloy and his accountant freeze\n with alarm as a sprinkling of dust settles on the room.\n\n AMBROSE\n (to the accountant)\n Keep it going.\n\n STAMP'S VOICE\n Sean, this rat's reached the end of the\n maze.\n\n AMBROSE\n (into walkie-talkie)\n Is he alive?\n\n STAMP'S VOICE\n More or less.\n\n AMBROSE\n Bring him to me.\n\n INT - HELICOPTER - BILLY AND LUTHER\n\n Luther has the GPS computer starting to access the satellite.\n\n BILLY\n (nervously)\n We're due to take off.\n\n LUTHER\n Not for seven more minutes.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE - WALLIS\n\n checking his computer screen, which shows the transfer has\n finished successfully.\n\n WALLIS\n Sean. Transfer complete.\n\n Stamp drags Ethan in, arms pinned with heavy tape. Stamp\n Ethan look grimy as sandbags after a busy day of tunneling.\n\n Ambrose rises to examine his prize.\n\n MCCLOY\n (apprehensive)\n What exactly do you intend to do with him?\n\n Ambrose walks behind Ethan and kicks his knees out from under\n him. Ethan falls to the floor.\n\n INT - HELICOPTER - BILLY AND LUTHER\n\n LUTHER\n Ethan? Ethan? Do you copy?\n\n Luther hears nothing in response but while noise. He looks to\n Billy and indicates there's no answer.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, mate, maybe this is one of those\n times we shouldn't follow orders.\n\n EXT - HELICOPTER (DAY)\n\n the rotor blades turn over.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE BUILDING (DAY)\n\n AMBROSE\n (to Ethan)\n What have you got to say for yourself.\n Hunt? Any last words?\n\n Ethan appears as if he wants to respond, but can't. Ambrose\n kicks him again.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Stop mumbling.\n\n STAMP\n Afraid he's got no choice. I believe I\n broke his jaw.\n\n AMBROSE\n Hugh, I'm impressed..\n\n Ambrose has picked up a pair of Berettas, and is proceeding to\n load both full seventeen round clips.\n\n MCCLOY\n (anxiety mounting)\n What do you intend to do?\n\n Ambrose favors McCloy with a glance of genial exacerbation.\n\n AMBROSE\n You needn't watch.\n\n FULL SHOT - HELICOPTER (DAY)\n\n rising off the golf green, and banking toward the island.\n\n INT - SLABHOUSE (DAY)\n\n Ambrose standing before Hunt with a pair of fully loaded\n Berettas. The sound of the helicopter grows.\n\n AMBROSE\n - right. We don't have a lot of time,\n Hunt. whatever you've got to say, say it\n now.\n\n Ethan indeed makes some considerable effort to speak but can only\n manage a few guttural, progressively desperate sounds which\n continue as:\n \n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Sorry mate, I can't understand a bloody\n word. How about giving us a big smile to\n remember you by?\n (hearing the helicopter)\n No? Well, then. This is what's known as\n getting your gun off.\n\n With that Ambrose empties thirty four rounds from the two\n Berettas into Ethan whose body jerks crazily on the floor.\n McCloy nearly faints, and Ambrose laughs at his squeamishness\n until something on Ethan's body catches his eye: the top of the\n little finger on the right hand is bleeding. Ambrose grabs\n Ethan's face, and rips off a latex mask: revealing Stamp, eyes\n wide open and thoroughly lifeless. His jaw, under the mask had\n been taped carefully close with the same heavy tape Ethan has\n used to mount the drain-pipe shotgun on the tunnel wall.\n\n AMBROSE (cont'd)\n Bloody hell!\n\n He looks around, but Stamp is gone. So is the cannister and\n kevlar vest that had been on the table moments before.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND\n\n Ethan's on the motorcycle, heading toward the gates, which a pair\n of security guards are frantically trying to close.\n\n Billy and Luther in the copter are over the island, and bank so\n Luther can fire a grenade launcher and blow the back of Ambrose's\n boat.\n\n The guards close the gate, Ethan runs the motorcycle up the\n hillock and jumps the gate, over onto the bridge. Ambrose follows\n in the SUV, crashing thru the gate.\n\n They race across the bridge and the road, onto the huge\n greensward opposite to and similar in shape to Bare Island.\n There, with the helicopter hovering, Ambrose manages to corner\n Ethan and after they expend whatever ammunition their weapons\n hold, they move into each other bare handed and engage in\n ferocious, no-holds-barred combat, the helicopter hovering low\n enough to keep away whatever's left of Ambrose's henchmen, the\n chopper's downdraft hitting them and flattening the grass around\n them. Ethan prevails.\n\n A SPECTACULAR VIEW OF SYDNEY\n\n on bluffs overlooking the city. Camera moves slowly to the top\n of the bluff.\n\n EXT/INT - IMF HELICOPTER (DAY)\n\n With Billy flying and Luther at the door, machine gun in\n hand, the copter nears the Bare Island gun pit and Ethan.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND GUN PIT - ETHAN\n\n runs into the central 'hole' area, guns in both hands and\n wearing the kevlar vest. He runs toward the walled edge of \n the enclosure and jumps. As he pulls himself up the top of\n the wall, he sees the IMF helicopter approaching.\n\n A gunman appears from the tunnel entrance and opens fire, the\n bullets exploding into the wall around Ethan, who jumps out\n of the way to avoid them.\n\n EXT/INT - IMF HELICOPTER\n\n is under fire as well, bullets spraying the windshield,\n driving Luther back inside and causing Billy to turn the\n chopper around.\n\n BILLY\n Man at your six.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND GUN PIT - ETHAN\n\n who rolls and returns fire at the gunman. Ethan first hits\n the gunman in the leg, and then shoots and explodes the\n canisters behind the gunman, killing him.\n\n ETHAN\n (to Billy)\n The field of fire is too heavy. Back off\n and pinpoint their positions.\n\n BEAR ISLAND HILL - MOTORCYCLE\n\n bearing down on him as he stands up. Ethan just manages to\n dive out of its path before a second motorcycle comes up over\n the hill. Ethan flips backwards and fires his pistol,\n shooting the second cyclist off his bike.\n\n The motorcycle flies over Ethan, who runs after it and jumps\n on, revving the throttle and taking off.\n\n BEAR ISLAND - PARKING AREA - AMBROSE\n\n deploys some of his men via walkie-talkie while others\n scramble into their cars.\n\n AMBROSE\n (into walkie-talkie)\n Hunt's heading for the bridge. Coming in\n at twelve o'clock high.\n\n BEAR ISLAND BRIDGE\n\n A Gold Falcon with several of Ambrose's men inside enters the\n bridge from the mainland and speeds toward the island.\n\n EXT - BEAR ISLAND COMPLEX\n\n Ambrose's men exit the complex and get into their cars.\n\n BEAR ISLAND HILL - ETHAN\n\n crests a hill aboard the cycle, the IMF chopper in b.g.\n\n ETHAN\n Clear that bridge for me.\n\n LUTHER' VOICE\n Roger that.\n\n BILLY'S VOICE\n They're tracking you on the left, Ethan.\n Prepare for some fire.\n\n BEAR ISLAND ROADWAY\n\n Michael's SUV and Wallis' sedan speed along as a gunman from the\n SUV fires on Ethan up the hill, spraying bullets around him.\n\n BEAR ISLAND BRIDGE - GOLD FALCON\n\n approaches the island. Luther fires his grenade launcher. It\n hits the Falcon's trunk, lifting its back wheel off the ground,\n but the Falcon keeps coming, its trunk ablaze. Luther reloads as\n a gunman leans out the window, firing up at Ethan on the hill.\n\n BEAR ISLAND HILL - ETHAN\n\n lays on the cycle's throttle, accelerates down the hill and\n propels the bike into the air and off the island, just as\n \n EXT - IMF HELICOPTER - LUTHER\n\n again fires his grenade launcher, this time at the front of the\n \n BEAR ISLAND BRIDGE - GOLD FALCON\n\n on the bridge. The grenade explodes at the front of the car\n and hurls the Falcon into the air and off the bridge.\n\n BEAR ISLAND - HILL/BRIDGE - ETHAN\n\n is in mid-air on the cycle, heading down toward the bridge. Just\n as he lands, the Gold Falcon flies off the bridge, and Ethan\n speeds through the flames and off onto the mainland.\n\n BEAR ISLAND - BRIDGE\n\n Michael's SUV arrives and tears through the gate and flames,\n followed by Wallis' sedan and then Ambrose, riding a motorcycle.\n\n ROAD LEADING FROM BRIDGE - ETHAN\n\n races up the road to find a white Falcon approaching.\n\n The IMF chopper arrives and gunfire's exchanged. Luther takes a\n hit in the shoulder and drops his gun as the chopper banks away.\n\n INT - HELICOPTER - LUTHER\n\n Luther grips his shoulder in pain and falls back into his seat,\n jarring the GPS computer. It responds by beeping and coming to\n life. Nyah's yellow dot pops up on the screen.\n\n GPS COMPUTER\n The target is located.\n\n LUTHER\n Ethan, the computer's up. I've got Nyah.\n She's moved out of the city.\n\n ETHAN\n Luther, say again.\n\n LUTHER\n She's on the North Head Bluff - \n approaching the cliffs. One klick away.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY - ETHAN\n\n ETHAN\n (over increasing static)\n Copy. She's only got twenty-eight minutes\n left. Track ahead and pick her up.\n\n INT - IMF HELICOPTER \n\n Luther bands his shoulder wound and monitors his GPS laptop.\n\n LUTHER\n We won't be able to cover you.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY - ETHAN\n\n slightly slows the bike to concentrate over the static.\n\n ETHAN\n You're breaking up. Track ahead and pick her \n up. You've got me on GPS. Bring her to me.\n\n Ethan pulls out and throws away the earpiece.\n\n INT - IMF HELICOPTER\n\n LUTHER\n Billy, North Head. Haul ass.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY\n\n Ethan heads downhill as the SUV approaches on an adjacent road.\n He pulls out in front of it, immediately drawing fire. Without\n slowing, Ethan drops to the side his cycle for cover.\n\n INT - IMF HELICOPTER - LUTHER\n\n watches the GPS laptop as the chopper speeds over Sydney.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY - ETHAN AND WALLIS' SEDAN\n\n Wallis' sedan appears from an adjoining road and pulls in behind\n Ethan, who climbs back aboard his cycle. Cut off, the SUV turns\n onto a side road to intercept Ethan.\n\n WALLIS\n Get him.\n\n ULRICH\n I can't get a good shot.\n\n Before an intersection, Ethan both revs and brakes, spinning the\n bike and creating a smoke screen. Wallis' car enters the smoke.\n\n ULRICH (cont'd)\n I can't see him, mate. Slow down!\n\n WALLIS\n Shut up. I know what I'm doing.\n\n Wallis breaks hard, but not hard enough: he stops just in the\n path of an oncoming 18-wheeler. His car's demolished.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY - ETHAN AND SUV\n\n Ethan pulls out of the smoke as the SUV bursts out of the scrub\n behind him, striking the rear of the cycle. Ethan puts his bike \n into a spin and pulls his gun, ending up alongside the SUV\n passenger window. He fires through the window, shooting both\n Michael and the bodyguard.\n\n The SUV veers off, crashing into a line of parked cars. It hits\n the first car and flips up and over, landing upside down on\n several more parked cars. Ethan speeds off on his smoking cycle.\n Ambrose arrives and then takes a side road.\n\n INT - IMF HELICOPTER - LUTHER\n\n working on his GPS laptop. The range -- ie, the distance from\n the moving copter to the yellow dot, Nyah, on the edge of the\n screen -- is reduced to about two kilometers.\n \n LUTHER\n (to Billy)\n Range is two kay.\n \n BILLY\n I hope there's a place to land.\n\n Luther looks up from the screen to see the bluff of North Head at\n the entrance to Sydney's harbor.\n\n EXT - THREE-LINED ROADWAY - ETHAN\n\n tearing down the road, when suddenly from a side trail Ambrose\n pulls out behind him and begins firing. Ethan weaves to avoid\n Ambrose's fire and passes a car, pulling in front of it for\n cover. The car skids, forcing Ambrose to veer around it.\n\n FROM COPTER TO GROUND (MOVING)\n\n rapidly approaching the North Head bluff.\n\n BILLY\n There she is. I got visual.\n\n LUTHER\n We're down to seven minutes 23 seconds..\n\n HIGH ANGLE - NORTH HEAD\n\n moving up behind Nyah who is walking purposefully to the edge of\n the bluff and a precipitous drop to rocks and surf a hundred and \n fifty feet below.\n\n Camera drops to Nyah's shoulder level and moves with her to the\n bluff's edge. As she's just a few steps away from stepping\n off, there's a roar and the helicopter rises into the shot,\n before her wild-eyed Billy gesturing, 'Stop! Stop!' to Nyah.\n\n EXT - ROADWAY\n\n Ethan passes narrowly between a car and oncoming truck. Ambrose\n follows as soon as the truck clears. Ethan fires backward using \n his side-view mirror to aim, exploding Ambrose's windscreen.\n Ambrose skids until his wheel clips a rock, knocking him upright.\n\n Ethan turns into a side road and speeds through open scrub. Back\n on the main road, Ambrose roars off to intercept Ethan.\n\n EXT - CLIFFTOP - ROCK LEDGE\n\n On a clifftop clearing, Ethan races along as Ambrose moves to cut\n him off. They head toward one another.\n\n LUTHER'S VOICE\n Ethan, we've got her. Tracking to you now.\n We're reading 5 minutes 19 seconds.\n\n EXT - CLIFFTOP - CLEARING\n\n Ethan and Ambrose round a bend and face one another. Without\n hesitating, they charge towards each other. As they near one\n another, each leaps forward and off his bike, and they collide\n hard in mid-air. They fall to the ground fighting as their bikes\n skid and Ethan's explodes, raining debris upon them.\n\n Ethan and Ambrose rush towards one another. Ethan flips Ambrose\n to the ground. Ambrose pulls a gun from his ankle holster. As\n Ethan knocks it away, he loses his own gun and they both fall off\n a 30-foot cliff.\n\n INT - IMF HELICOPTER\n\n at top speed over Sydney. Nyah appears weak and shivers.\n\n LUTHER\n (to Billy)\n Bearing two one zero. About 3 klicks.\n (into microphone)\n Ethan, we're moments away..\n\n EXT - CLIFFTOP - CLEARING - FIGHT\n\n Ethan and Ambrose rise from the fall. Ethan jumps up and sweeps\n Ambrose, dropping him to the ground. Ethan begins strangling\n Ambrose but gets knocked off, and when they both stand, Ambrose\n gets Ethan in a choke hold.\n\n Ambrose hits him and grabs a rock and hits Ethan in the\n midsection and the face. Ethan kicks it out of his hand and\n connects with several punches, knocking Ambrose to the ground.\n\n Kneeling, Ambrose pulls a knife from a boot holster and cuts\n Ethan across the back and face. Ambrose dives on Ethan and the\n knife is poised above Ethan's eye before Ethan grabs the knife\n and clears, holding it out toward Ambrose.\n\n AMBROSE\n Go ahead. Use it Hunt. It's not a bad\n way to go. A lot better than the way that\n bitch is going to die.\n\n Ambrose swings again and misses, and Ethan delivers a series of\n kicks, leaving Ambrose stunned and barely standing. Ethan steps\n back, and with a running start, strikes Ambrose with a leaping\n kick that drops him to the ground and knock the knife out of his\n hand.\n\n EXT/INT - IMF HELICOPTER - CLIFFTOP\n\n As they approach in the distance, Billy, Luther and Nyah finally\n gain sight of Ethan in hand-to-hand combat.\n\n EXT - CLIFFTOP - CLEARING - FIGHT\n\n Ethan turns and walks away from Ambrose toward the cliff edge.\n The copter lands and Luther runs toward Ethan but pulls up,\n looking over Ethan's shoulder. Ambrose has a gun aimed at \n Ethan's back.\n\n AMBROSE\n Hunt. You should have killed me.\n\n Near Hunt's feet is his own gun, obscured from Ambrose's view by\n dust from the copter. Ethan tosses the canister to Luther and\n then kicks his gun up out of the dirt and into the air. He\n catches it, drops down and fires, killing Ambrose.\n\n EXT/ INT - HELICOPTER ON CLIFFTOP\n\n Ethan reaches Nyah at the copter. Inches apart, they can only\n stare silently at one another.\n\n INT - CULTURAL MUSEUM\n\n Didgeridoo music. A child admires a painting. Swanbeck and Ethan\n face one another. A long, long pause. For a moment it appears as\n if Swanbeck has lost awareness of Ethan's presence.\n\n SWANBECK\n Sorry, Ethan. I don't quite know where to\n begin. Any suggestions?\n\n ETHAN\n You'd like me to conduct my own\n debriefing.\n\n SWANBECK\n Why not? You've done just about\n everything else on this operation.\n\n ETHAN\n I'd thank you -- but I'm not sure that was\n a compliment.\n\n SWANBECK\n Of course it was. Anyone whose operations\n requires the level of disinformation that\n yours do, is bound to get a little flak\n here and there. You try flogging the\n stories on CNN I've had to come up with\n about what's been going on around here the\n last few days. At any rate, it's been\n most instructive -- what they'll swallow,\n or what they'll broadcast with a straight\n face.\n (picking up a file)\n Miss Hall's blood, it appears, has\n absolutely no elements of the Chimera\n virus. Not even antibodies.\n\n ETHAN\n Yes, I gathered as much.\n\n SWANBECK\n And the only other remaining sample was in\n the canister you recover from Ambrose.\n\n ETHAN\n Yes.\n\n SWANBECK\n And that appears to have been destroyed.\n It also contained the anti-virus,\n Bellerophon.\n\n ETHAN\n Well, Bellerophon, it turns out, was only\n really effective against Chimera.\n\n SWANBECK\n But you were under specific instructions\n to bring back a living sample of the\n Chimera virus. I'd be very interested to\n know how, after you'd managed its recovery\n intact, it subsequently got destroyed.\n\n ETHAN\n By fire. That's the best way, really.\n\n\n SWANBECK\n So you didn't fail mission, you simply\n changed it.\n\n Ethan doesn't respond.\n\n SWANBECK (cont'd)\n It's no longer enough for you to execute\n and implement IMF policy, you now wish to\n go in the business of creating it?\n\n ETHAN\n No, I don't. But in this case -\n\n SWANBECK\n In this case, it wasn't a bad idea. In\n face, it was a pretty damn good idea.\n Just don't make a habit of it. And, as for\n Ms. Hall, in light of her efforts, her\n criminal records will certainly be\n expunged. I'm assuming you approve.\n\n ETHAN\n I do.\n\n SWANBECK\n Where is she now, by the way? Do you\n know?\n\n ETHAN\n I don't. No exactly.\n\n SWANBECK\n Well, Hunt, what are your plans?\n\n ETHAN\n Not sure. Some sort of vacation. I'll\n let you know where I'm going.\n\n SWANBECK\n Oh, you don't have to do that. Wouldn't \n be a vacation if you did.\n\n Ethan and Swanbeck exchange one final, knowing glance.\n\n SKY NEWSCASTER\n This incident in the wake of rumors\n suddenly surfacing about Mr. McCloy and \n Biocyte's financial difficulties --\n including criminal allegations of insider \n trading, embezzlement, conspiracy to\n commit fraud, and stock parking -- have,\n understandably, sent stock prices of the\n pharmaceutical company plummeting.\n\n EXT - SYDNEY (DAY)\n\n Ethan emerges to a very crowded street. Billy and Luther are\n waiting. Both look to Ethan.\n\n LUTHER\n (worried)\n So what did he say?\n\n ETHAN\n Good job. And thanks.\n\n BILLY\n (incredulous)\n That's it? That's it? That's it?\n\n LUTHER\n (dryly, looking at Billy)\n And the check's in the mall.\n\n BILLY\n Right. Just remember, mates. Billy\n Baird's the name. Anything you need to\n get, move or watch, I'm your man.\n\n And Billy's gone. Ethan and Luther remain alone, both reluctant\n to say anything, both reluctant to leave.\n\n One quick bear hug, then:\n\n LUTHER\n Always nice hearing from you man. Stay in \n touch..\n\n And Luther's off. Ethan looks after him, a bit wistfully. Then,\n curiously tentative he moves off into the crowd. After a half-\n dozen steps, something catches his eyes. He stops.\n\n One quick bear hug, then:\n\n NYAH\n (a tad wary)\n Do you know me?\n\n NYAH\n\n is inches from him. Without batting an eye.\n\n\n ETHAN\n No. Should I?\n\n NYAH\n No. You just looked as if you did.\n\n ETHAN\n No...\n\n She wraps her arms around him and kisses him with considerable\n conviction.\n\n ETHAN (cont'd)\n ...just as if I'd like to.\n\n NYAH\n Oh. Well..\n\n He kisses her with a conviction that is more than a match for\n hers.\n\n NYAH (cont'd)\n ..I think that can be arranged.\n\n Looks around at the swirling crowd:\n\n ETHAN\n Let's get lost.\n\n And in a moment they've vanished from the frame and into the\n crowd. Camera begins to pull back, the bustling crowd ever\n filling the frame - and in the distance, perhaps, just a splash\n of a bouquet of flowers can be seen, appearing to bounce along on\n its own, the rising beat of the MI theme:\n\n BEGIN CREDITS: IMF II - CHIMERA\n\n\n\n "
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Monkeybone' ?"
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"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n screenplay by\r\n Sam Hamm\r\n\r\n based on the comic book\r\n \"Dark Town\" by\r\n Kaja Blackley and Vanessa Chong\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n SEVENTH DRAFT\r\n 3 FEBRUARY 1999\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nFADE IN:\r\n\r\nMAIN CREDITS ROLL\r\n\r\nover BLACK SCREEN, with PORTENTOUS SPOOKY MUSIC underneath. Just as the\r\nmusic reaches its crescendo, we hear a simian SCREECH.\r\n\r\nA BUCK-TOOTHED CARTOON MONKEY swings past on a vine. TITLE WIPES IN with\r\nhim:\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE(tm)\r\n in\r\n \"FREUD CHICKEN!\"\r\n\r\nTIGHT CLOSEUP - STANLEY (ANIMATED)\r\n\r\nA POCKETWATCH swings back and forth in F.G. Gaping at it is a goofy,\r\nbespectacled CARTOON CHARACTER, sucking his thumb as his EYES move back\r\nand forth. After a moment, the LEFT EYE freezes in place - but the right\r\neye keeps going back and forth with the watch.\r\n\r\n SHRINK'S VOICE (o.s.)\r\n Back, Stanley...you're going back...back to when\r\n it all began. Are you going back yet? Come on,\r\n get back, ve haven't got all day.\r\n\r\nNow BOTH EYES are locked in place. The patient is hypnotized.\r\n\r\nINT. SCHOOLROOM - DAY (ANIMATED)\r\n\r\nA squat, lumpy TEACHER, MISS HUDLAPP, is straining to erase the\r\nGettysburg Address, which is written along the very top of the\r\nblackboard. There's an obtrusive, rhythmic BANGING noice in B.G.\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n It was third grade. The teacher was Miss\r\n Hudlapp. She was kinda squat and lumpy - she\r\n smelled funny - but she was kind.\r\n\r\n MISS HUDLAPP\r\n CLASS!\r\n (turning around suddenly)\r\n How many times have I told you? In this class we\r\n do not pound tenpenny nails into Stanley's head!\r\n\r\nREVERSE ANGLE - ON STANLEY\r\n\r\nHapless ten-year-old STANLEY, still goofy and bespectacled, in his\r\nfront-row desk. NAILS stick out of his head. The FOUR MEAN KIDS poised\r\naround him lower their hammers and return to their seats, grumbling.\r\n\r\nA dreamy SMILE crosses STANLEY's face as he gazes at MISS HUDLAPP.\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n You know how some teachers have those, kind of,\r\n flaps on their arms - those big sacks of limp\r\n flab that like, dangle?\r\n\r\nAs MISS HUDLAPP pulls her sweater off, TWO MASSIVE ARM-FLAPS - fifty\r\ngallons of flab apiece - SPILL OUT and SMACK INTO THE FLOOR.\r\n\r\nMISS HUDDLAPP claps two erasers together, kicking up a cloud of dust.\r\nYoung STANLEY watches, transfixed by her massive ARM FLAPS. We TRACK IN\r\non the gigantic ARM FLAPS as they swing hypnotically back and forth,\r\nwith a loud SLAP each time they collide.\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n It sounds weird...but for some reason, as I\r\n watched those big old flaps of hers, I began to\r\n feel...well...oddly...\r\n\r\nNow we TRACK IN on the mesmerized STANLEY. A SONG comes up underneath:\r\nDonna Summer, \"I FEEL LOVE.\"\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n ...aroused.\r\n (beat)\r\n And then the horror began.\r\n\r\nDOINK! STANLEY looks down at his LAP in horror. The boys and girls\r\naround him are pointing and tittering.\r\n\r\nGrimacing in embarrassment, he discreetly places a heavy TEXTBOOK onto\r\nhis lap, suppressing the bulge in his pants. But SPROING!! - the BOOK\r\ngoes flying across the room. The BULGE is fighting back!\r\n\r\nThe kids DUCK AND COVER beneath their desks as STANLEY slams a STACK of\r\ntextbooks onto his lap. It's no use - the WHOLE STACK goes flying, and\r\nBOOKS come raining down on the entire class! Now MISS HUDLAPP is staring\r\ndirectly at him...\r\n\r\n MISS HUDLAPP\r\n Young man. What's that in your lap?\r\n\r\nShe marches toward him. STANLEY pulls his BACKPACK over his lap.\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n It was useless. Like putting a baseball cap on\r\n the Washington Monument. And then...all at once\r\n ...there he was.\r\n\r\nThe BACKPACK bucks and wriggles, as if something inside is trying to GET\r\nOUT. And then - with a flourish of rousing disco strings - IT DOES!\r\n\r\n STANLEY (V.O.)\r\n Monkeybone!!\r\n\r\nThe libidinous cartoon monkey BURSTS OUT of the backpack, POINTS at MISS\r\nHUDLAPP - and announces, in his Barry White baritone:\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Oooo-oo-ooh, baby. I love your way.\r\n\r\nKC and the SUNSHINE BAND comes up underneath as MONKEYBONE DANCES to the\r\nfront of the class. He grabs MISS HUDLAPP by the hands and begins\r\ndancing The Bump with her ARM FLAPS. Butt left, WHAP. Butt right, WHAP.\r\n\r\nThe KIDS are bug-eyed - agog. With each WHAP their little heads turn\r\nback and forth as if they're watching a nude tennis match.\r\n\r\nINT. SCREENING ROOM - ON AUDIENCE (LIVE-ACTION)\r\n\r\nA roomful of LIVE HUMANS watching the cartoon, heads turning in sync\r\nwith the kids onscreen. TV-INDUSTRY HIPSTERS, AD EXECS, MANUFACTURER'S\r\nREPS...they're all guests at this sneak preview of the Monkeybone show,\r\nand they're LAUGHING UPROARIOUSLY.\r\n\r\nIn the midst of the crowd is a handsome young couple: JULIE McELROY and\r\nSTU MILEY. JULIE's a research scientist, brainy, professional,\r\nabnormally well-adjusted - and pretty enough that she'd be intimidating\r\nif it weren't for a prominent goofy streak.\r\n\r\nSTU is the one guy in the auditorium who isn't laughing at the cartoon\r\non the screen. In fact, he's solemn as a judge - peering nervously\r\naround to see how the rest of the audience is responding.\r\n\r\nWhy? Because he's the cartoonist who created the characters on screen.\r\nIn his looks (gangly, disheveled) and manner (sardonic, self-\r\ndeprecating), he's the obvious model for the character of STANLEY.\r\n\r\nINT. CLASSROOM (ANIMATED)\r\n\r\nAs the monkey dance continues, we ZOOM IN on the mortified face of\r\nLITTLE STANLEY. His eyes begin doing the familiar HYPNO-SWIRL...\r\n\r\nINT. SHRINK'S OFFICE (ANIMATED)\r\n\r\nA CUCKOO pops out of a wall clock. ADULT STANLEY'S THUMB pops out of his\r\nmouth. He awakens from his trance in a cold sweat.\r\n\r\n STANLEY\r\n How about it, Doc? Can you help me?\r\n\r\n SHRINK\r\n Not overnight. These imaginary monkey cases take\r\n time. I vould estimate...roughly...\r\n\r\nOn the desk is a CATALOGUE, open to a two-page spread depicting a 40-\r\nfoot CABIN CRUISER. \"NEW FOR SUMMER! ONLY $229,999.95!\" With his free\r\nhand, the SHRINK is working a CALCULATOR...\r\n\r\n SHRINK\r\n Twelve years and three months ought to do it.\r\n\r\nThe SHRINK hustles STANLEY to the door and shakes his hand.\r\n\r\n STANLEY\r\n One question, doc - what did you mean when you\r\n said \"imaginary\"?\r\n\r\n SHRINK\r\n All in good time, my boy. All in good time.\r\n\r\nThe SHRINK shoves STANLEY out and slams the door behind him. Two beats.\r\nThen he doubles over, WEEPING with LAUGHTER.\r\n\r\n SHRINK\r\n Vot a crackpot! Monkey on ze back - HAH!! ROLL\r\n OUT ZE WACKY WAGON!!\r\n\r\nNow he notices a BACKPACK, which STANLEY has left on the couch. It\r\nTWITCHES slightly - of its own free will.\r\n\r\n VOICE IN BACKPACK\r\n Imaginary, huh? You quack.\r\n\r\nEXT. SHRINK'S BUILDING (ANIMATED)\r\n\r\nA WINDOW shatters. The SHRINK comes hurtling out. MONKEYBONE STRADDLES\r\nHIM like Slim Pickens riding an H-bomb, hootin' and hollerin' all the\r\nway down to the street.\r\n\r\nSPLAT! A gob of gore hits STANLEY in the face as he exits the building.\r\nHe kneels on the sidewalk - finding a PIPE and a GOATEE.\r\n\r\n STANLEY\r\n Aw, Monkeybone! At this rate I'll never find a\r\n good shrink.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Those guys are a waste of money! I'll show you\r\n how to stop sucking your thumb...\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE sticks his thumb in his butt as he and STANLEY toddle off\r\ninto the sunset.\r\n\r\nINT. SCREENING ROOM - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nSTANDING O from the crowd as the cartoon ends and the lights come up.\r\nHERB, an all-purpose sidekick type, appears at the podium:\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Thank you...that's our pilot...the good news is,\r\n Comedy Channel has just picked us up with an\r\n order for six new episodes!\r\n\r\nHERB leads a round of APPLAUSE. JULIE nudges STU - the only guy in the\r\nroom who's still in his seat.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Now, let's give it up for the guy who started it\r\n all. Creator of America's most disturbed comic\r\n strip...the man behind the monkey...Mister Stu\r\n Miley!\r\n\r\nA SPOTLIGHT hits him, and he STANDS to tumultuous applause. He looks\r\ngenuinely stunned. He can't believe it's happening.\r\n\r\nJULIE surreptitiously PINCHES him on the bottom, giving him a start. She\r\nWINKS at him. He shoots her a small private smile - then turns to WAVE\r\nat the adoring crowd.\r\n\r\nINT. LOBBY - HALF-HOUR LATER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU working his way through a crowd of well-wishers and FANS.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I don't actually draw all the animation, no. We\r\n have sweatshop workers who couldn't get jobs at\r\n Nike doing that.\r\n\r\nA beautiful, heavily-pierced FEMALE FAN hands STU a marker.\r\n\r\n BEAUTIFUL FAN\r\n Mr. Miley, would you draw Monkeybone on my\r\n belly? As a guide?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Guide...?\r\n\r\n BEAUTIFUL FAN\r\n For my tattoo artist?\r\n\r\nShe exposes her taut midriff. STU thinks for a moment, then goes to\r\nwork. When he's done, Monkeybone appears to be climbing out of the\r\ngirl's pants and WAVING to her. Nearby FANS APPLAUD.\r\n\r\n BEAUTIFUL FAN\r\n Wait! You have to draw the rest of him -\r\n\r\nShe begins unbuckling her belt so STU will have enough room to draw\r\nMonkeybone's bottom half. STU demurs...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I - I have to, uh, check in with my doctor. DO-\r\n OCCCC!!\r\n\r\nHe wanders across the room, finds JULIE deep in conversation with a\r\nbunch of other GUESTS, and pulls her aside.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hey, Doc. Come here. There's something really\r\n cool I want to show you.\r\n\r\nHe grabs her by the sleeve, pulls her across the floor to -\r\n\r\nINT. ALCOVE - OFF LOBBY - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThere's nothing \"cool\" about it - it's a stairway landing, with metal\r\nfire doors that open onto the parking lot outside.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n See these doors? The cool thing is, you go out\r\n ...they close...you can't get back in!\r\n\r\nHe opens one door and holds it for JULIE.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n You want to leave? But Stu - you're a big hit!\r\n Everyone loves you!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n They don't love me. They love Monkeybone.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n It was you who got the standing O. It was you\r\n drawing on the belly over there...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n That was especially Monkeybone. Come on, Doc, I\r\n don't want to be stuck here with this bunch of\r\n media creeps. I just want to be us. Home. Alone!\r\n (conspiratorially)\r\n I have something I have to give you.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Can't you give it to me later?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Yeah, I could, but the thing is, if later got\r\n here sooner, it would be...better.\r\n\r\nHe gives up trying to explain...pulls her close and kisses her. For a\r\nmoment they completely forget about the party in the next room.\r\n\r\nThen HERB appears behind them, trying to catch STU's eye as he waits for\r\nthe clinch to break up. Finally he pries them apart:\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Sorry, Julie - won't be a minute. Now Stu - I\r\n know you don't like the idea, but you really\r\n ought to talk to these guys -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Julie and I - we were just gonna go...\r\n\r\nBut before STU knows what's hit him, HERB is leading him back to -\r\n\r\nINT. LOBBY - THAT MOMENT - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Go? There's a potload of money here, pal. You\r\n got three major toy companies...you got the guys\r\n from Burger God over here...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Burger God. The ones that found the pig hair in\r\n the french fries?\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Never proven. They're ready to pop for a pre-\r\n emptive endorsement. Kids love Burger God -\r\n\r\nThe MERCHANDISERS shoot STU an expectant wave. STU waves back and turns\r\nin the opposite direction. HERB grabs him by the sleeve.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Herb, it's too much. It's all out of hand.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Do you know what kind of opportunity you have\r\n here? You gotta strike. I'm talking mansions.\r\n Lamborghinis. Champagne for mouthwash when you\r\n brush your teeth!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I don't want to be rich. It's just a trap!\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Being rich is not a trap. That is a dirty lie\r\n perpetuated by rich people to keep the failures\r\n from killing them.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Herb. I have to go.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Why?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I got the ring.\r\n (beat)\r\n Tonight's the night, Herb. Tonight's the night.\r\n\r\nHe nods toward JULIE, who's at the open bar grabbing two glasses of\r\npunch. HERB realizes a proposal is in the works.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Oh my God...you're proposing?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n My life was totally crappy, Herb, and she...\r\n fixed it. She made me happy. Which I'd never\r\n been. She loves me the way I am - right now.\r\n (beat)\r\n I don't want everything to change. I don't want\r\n her saying yes to some big success. I just want\r\n her saying yes to me.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n ...In some weird way I respect that.\r\n\r\nJULIE's over by the punchbowl. She sees the two boys staring at her\r\nconspiratorially - MAKES A FACE at them as she waves back.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Okay then. If I get you out of here - you pop\r\n the question - tonight. Or else. Get me?\r\n\r\nSTU nods gravely.\r\n\r\nEXT. PARKING LOT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU, JULIE, and HERB in the parking lot. A small safari of FLUNKIES is\r\nloading enormous boxes full of MONKEYBONE JUNK into STU's beat-up car -\r\nstuffed dolls, action figures, board games, lunchboxes, beach towels,\r\nteam jackets and more! STU groans at the sight of it...\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n They're just prototypes...take 'em home and look\r\n at 'em before you say no...\r\n (scanning the streets)\r\n If you could just hold on a minute or two, we're\r\n expecting a couple more trucks.\r\n\r\nSTU GLOWERS at HERB as he opens the car door for JULIE.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Okay, okay! You're a beautiful couple. Go.\r\n\r\nINT. CAR - NIGHT - MOVING\r\n\r\nSTU backs out of his space. The small parking lot is full of DELIVERY\r\nTRUCKS from would-be merchandisers - all too large for the spaces\r\nthey're parked in. STU has to keep backing up because the exit lanes are\r\nblocked. It's like negotiating a labyrinth.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Look at this! He won't let us leave!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Who?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n The monkey!! He's everywhere! He'll take over\r\n both our lives if we let him.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu - stop it. That monkey is good luck. You\r\n thought him up, and everybody loves him, and\r\n he's probably going to make you rich. So relax!\r\n Enjoy it!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'm trying. It's weird, that's all. I never had\r\n any good luck, until I met you...what if it's\r\n all just another bad dream?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What's the \"bad\" part?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I might wake up.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n (laughing; taking his hand)\r\n If you do, I'll be right there beside you. So\r\n face it. You're just going to have to be happy!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I am happy. It just so happens this is the\r\n happiest night of my life.\r\n\r\nHe says it so solemnly that she cracks up. After a moment he joins in.\r\n\r\nEXT. PARKING LOT - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA PLASTIC BANNER stretches between two poles on either side of the entry\r\nto the lot. It shows MONKEYBONE in a typical languorous pose:\r\n\r\n It's His World. We Just Live in It!\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Sunday Nights This Fall\r\n\r\nTWO GUYS on EXTENSION LADDERS are taking the sign down as STU'S CAR\r\nidles at the exit below. There's a strong wind tonight, and one guy\r\nLOSES HOLD of his end of the banner just as he gets it detached...\r\n\r\nINT. CAR - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nAs STU pulls into the intersection he sees a DELIVERY TRUCK approaching\r\nin the opposite lane, with a cardboard likeness of MONKEYBONE mounted\r\natop the cab. He chuckles...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n That damn monkey is everywh--\r\n\r\nSuddenly his view of the street DISAPPEARS. The MONKEYBONE BANNER has\r\nfallen DIRECTLY ACROSS HIS WINDSHIELD, like a huge SHROUD. All he can\r\nsee is a great, grinning MONKEY FACE!!\r\n\r\nJULIE SCREAMS. STU SCREAMS. Unable to see, he slams on the brakes and\r\nJERKS THE WHEEL RIGHT.\r\n\r\nOff screen: HORNS BLARING. TIRES SQUEALING. The horrible crunch of METAL\r\nON METAL.\r\n\r\nBut Stu's car comes to a halt untouched. After a moment he opens his\r\neyes...and JULIE opens hers...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Did we just - hit something?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I don't think so.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Are you okay??\r\n\r\nShe thinks it over, nods. STU takes a moment to catch his breath, then\r\nopens the door gingerly. A HORN BLARES as a car speeds past in the\r\nopposite lane, nearly taking STU's door off. He jumps back inside,\r\nwaits, opens the door again...\r\n\r\nEXT. INTERSECTION - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nHis eyes widen in horror as he steps out to survey the scene. The\r\nasphalt is strewn with MONKEYBONE MERCHANDISE - stuffed dolls, games,\r\nlunchboxes. SKID MARKS show where the TRUCK which was carrying all this\r\nSWERVED...\r\n\r\n...and slammed into the rear of a BUICK REGAL, pinning it up against a\r\nTELEPHONE POLE. STU races up to the Buick. Its front end is mashed up\r\nlike an accordion, but the occupants - a couple of TEENAGERS dressed for\r\nthe prom - seem to be okay.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hey! Are you guys all right in there?\r\n\r\n TEENAGE GIRL\r\n We're fine.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n That stupid monkey banner! It fell on my\r\n windshield - it practically killed us all!\r\n (to JULIE)\r\n God, Julie, if anything had happened to you -\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I'm fine, baby. We're all okay. We were lucky.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'd better go report this...\r\n\r\nHe spots a PHONE BOOTH and starts across the street. On the way there he\r\nplucks a STUFFED MONKEYBONE DOLL off the pavement and CHOKES IT with\r\nboth hands.\r\n\r\nJULIE stays behind with the prom kids. The TEENAGE BOY in his tux is\r\nglassy-eyed, miserable beyond description.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Dad's car?\r\n\r\nThe BOY begins to SOB softly. JULIE nods in sympathy.\r\n\r\nThen: EVERYONE WINCES. The air is full of a horrible CREAKING noise,\r\nlike nails on a blackboard...\r\n\r\n TEENAGE GIRL\r\n What was that? Did you hear that?\r\n\r\nThe horrible CREAKING NOISE continues. JULIE turns. Behind her, the\r\nTELEPHONE POLE that the car slammed into is beginning to TEETER. Then it\r\nTOPPLES. Directly toward...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n STU!!\r\n\r\nON STU - IN PHONE BOOTH\r\n\r\nHe sees JULIE running toward him and holds up a single finger.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Operator? I want to report an accident.\r\n\r\nFinally he glances up - just in time to see the TELEPHONE POLE coming\r\ndown toward the phone booth like a gigantic sledgehammer. His eyes\r\nwiden. The STUFFED MONKEYBONE slips from his grasp...\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - MONKEYBONE\r\n\r\nA HORRIBLE CRASH. SCREAMS. CAMERA ZEROES IN on the MONKEYBONE DOLL which\r\nSTU was holding, surrounded by broken glass, its face twisted into an\r\ninsane, almost macabre grin.\r\n\r\nThe screen fades to PITCH BLACK for a few seconds...until we hear a\r\nDISTANT SIREN, and an IMAGE comes swimming into focus...\r\n\r\nSTU'S POV: ON JULIE\r\n\r\nHe's in the back of an ambulance, with PARAMEDICS all around him,\r\nworking feverishly. JULIE hovers above him, holding his hand.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu? I'm here, baby. It's me. It's Julie. I love\r\n you. You're gonna be okay, baby, I promise -\r\n\r\nAll at once he seems to be RECEDING from JULIE and the others - as if\r\nSINKING THROUGH the bottom of the stretcher, and BEYOND - through the\r\nfloor of the ambulance! JULIE's voice grows weaker, more distant:\r\n\r\n JULIE (V.O.)\r\n I'm here, baby. I won't leave you...\r\n\r\nAnd then all trace of the ambulance is gone, and he's floating down\r\nthrough some strange LIMBO, surrounded by the silhouettes of billowing\r\nSHROUDS, with the sound of BIRDS CALLING all around him...\r\n\r\nAn AWFUL MECHANICAL RATCHETING NOISE fills the soundtrack. STU's eyes\r\nclose - and when they reopen, he finds himself in:\r\n\r\nEXT. TROLLEY - MOVING\r\n\r\nA tiny ROLLER-COASTER CAR descends from dense clouds down the length of\r\nan impossibly long and rickety METAL TRACK. The track leads through a\r\nvast black VOID...\r\n\r\n...to a tiny ISLAND floating in the darkness...an island that looks not\r\nunlike a disembodied FIST.\r\n\r\nAnd, as the car draws closer, the fist begins to OPEN - tulip-like -\r\nturning into a HAND, with a full-sized TOWN nestled in its palm! In the\r\ntown, CARNIVAL LIGHTS begin to glitter. MUSIC begins to tinkle...\r\n\r\nEXT. PLATFORM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe car - a one-passenger job with a CARTOON ANIMAL FACE on its prow -\r\nstops with a lurch. STU steps out onto a fog-shrouded TRAIN STATION\r\nPLATFORM. Before he knows it, the little car DEPARTS behind him. He's\r\nstranded - alone.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hello? Anybody? - Am I dead?\r\n (beat)\r\n PLEASE. I'D LIKE TO KNOW IF I'M DEAD.\r\n\r\nOff in the fog is a big wheeled CART with the sign: \"PSYCHOLOGICAL\r\nBAGGAGE CLAIM.\" There STU finds two SUITCASES and a BACKPACK. He\r\nexamines the TAGS. They all belong to him!\r\n\r\nHe sits on the edge of the cart, opens a SUITCASE, and pulls out...\r\n\r\n - A bagged copy of Marvel Comics' Conan the Barbarian #1;\r\n\r\n - An 8mm reel of highlights from Ray Harryhausen's Jason and the\r\n Argonauts, with swordfighting skeletons on the box cover;\r\n\r\n - A SPIRAL NOTEBOOK, its cover labelled \"STU M. - GEOGRAPHY,\" its\r\n inside pages covered with drawings of dinosaurs and airplanes;\r\n\r\n - Transparent plastic models of \"THE VISIBLE MAN\" and his mate, \"THE\r\n VISIBLE WOMAN,\" with a couple of spare organs that young STU never\r\n quite found a place for;\r\n\r\n - A vinyl LP of \"BREAD'S GREATEST HITS,\" which STU quickly slips back\r\n into the suitcase lest anyone see it.\r\n\r\nAs he gathers his bags, he hears odd SQUEAKS and CHITTERING...\r\n\r\n RACCOON (o.s.)\r\n Carry your bags, mister?\r\n\r\nA STRANGE FURRY CREATURE pops out from beneath the platform and yanks on\r\nSTU's pants leg. It looks like a raccoon, but it's FLAT - an animated\r\npelt. Before STU has time to let out a yell, a FLAT SNAKESKIN comes\r\nslithering out from beneath the baggage cart...\r\n\r\n SNAKE\r\n Cigars, mister? Genuine Coobans!\r\n\r\nSTU looks down and sees a SQUASHED RABBIT humping his leg.\r\n\r\n RABBIT\r\n Wanna meet my sister?\r\n\r\nThese bordertown types are known as ROADKILL, and they're sporting the\r\ntire tracks to prove it. STU SCREAMS, shakes them off, and RUNS.\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN GATES - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA long stone STAIRWAY leads to decorative wrought-iron GATES. SHADOWY\r\nCARVED SPHINXES sit on either side. As STU races up the steps, a\r\nsputtering NEON SIGN comes to life overhead:\r\n\r\n D RK TOWN\r\n\r\nA FANFARE BLOWS as the creaky gates begin to part. A SPOTLIGHT hits the\r\nSPHINXES - and they COME TO LIFE! They rise up on their hind legs, put\r\non boater hats. One of them blows a note on a kazoo...\r\n\r\n SINGING SPHINXES\r\n Weeee...welcome you to Dark Town\r\n And while you're in your coma\r\n This odd amusement park-town\r\n Will be your Home Sweet Homa -\r\n\r\nSTU bolts THROUGH THE GATES, with the ROADKILL TRIO right on his heels.\r\nThe indignant SPHINXES exchange a look of outrage.\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN - MIDWAY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nIt's a carny town, a tourist trap, seedy and nightmarish. Despite the\r\nfestive trappings, there's something off about it - an air of neglect\r\nand decrepitude - as if they'd tried to turn Alcatraz into Disneyland,\r\nand given up halfway through.\r\n\r\nSTU looks back and sees the ROADKILL gaining on him. He spots a small\r\ngroup of OTHER HUMANS...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Help me. Please. There's animals. They -\r\n\r\nThe humans just YAWN. They're COMA VICTIMS, just like STU. He ditches\r\none of his SUITCASES as the ROADKILL come after him.\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Pony ride, Mister?\r\n\r\nHe turns and spots a helpful-looking fellow in a COWBOY OUTFIT. The\r\nCOWBOY is in fact a CENTAUR - rider and mount rolled into one!\r\n\r\nThe characters who run this place - the BARKERS, TICKET-TAKERS, and RIDE\r\nOPERATORS - are all weird HYBRIDS, part human, part ANIMAL. They could\r\nbe the ancient Gods of some primitive culture - reduced to working as\r\nstreet entertainers in this ramshackle resort town.\r\n\r\nSTU pinballs down the street, bouncing from one shock to another:\r\n\r\n - JOE CAMEL, doing community service as a STREET SWEEPER -\r\n\r\n JOE CAMEL\r\n Hey, Mister. Mister! Got a smoke?\r\n\r\n - a YETI selling SNO-CONES from a cart outside the MORPHEUM THEATRE.\r\n The marquee reads:\r\n\r\n LIVE! NIGHTMARES! LIVE!\r\n First-Run - Continuous Performances - Popular Prices\r\n Rated NR-H - Not Recommended for Humans\r\n\r\n - A CYCLOPS working as a barker at the Penny Arcade;\r\n\r\n - A VIDEO RENTAL OUTLET - \"BAD DREAMS VIDEO,\" offering your favorite\r\n nightmares, cult and classic, three nights for $2.95. A THREE-HEADED\r\n DEVIL emerges from the shop carrying a sackful of videos - and\r\n recognizes STU, much to his horror.\r\n\r\n HEAD #1\r\n Hey, aren't you Stu Miley?\r\n\r\n HEAD #2\r\n We're big fans.\r\n\r\n HEAD #3\r\n Could we have your autograph?\r\n\r\nReduced to babbling hysteria, STU ducks into the nearest building. Above\r\nthe door, an ANIMATED NEON SIGN shows a happy boozer lifting his martini\r\nglass, then falling over flat on his back, at which point his eyes are\r\nreplaced by the traditional cartoon X's. This is the COMA BAR.\r\n\r\nINT. COMA BAR - A MOMENT LATER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU bursts in, flattens himself against the wall as the ROADKILL skitter\r\npast outside. He's given them the slip. He looks around.\r\n\r\nThe bar's a weird melange of styles. COMA VICTIMS ride around in\r\nwheelchairs refurbished as BUMPER CARS, drinking cocktails from IV\r\nbottler. A four-armed ELEPHANT GOD is at the Mighty Wurlitzer while a\r\nMERMAID VOCALIST in a half-shell belts out the wistful lyrics of Johnny\r\nMercer's \"DREAM.\" And over at the BAR...\r\n\r\n BULL (o.s.)\r\n New in town, huh? What're you drinking?\r\n\r\nOut of breath, STU edges toward the bar as the BARTENDER, BULL, turns\r\naway to grab a fresh glass.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Chasing me - animals - horrible -\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Animals? What kind of animals?\r\n\r\nSTU GAGS. BULL is a full-fledged MINOTAUR, body of a man, head of a\r\nBULL. His features are CUBIST - weirdly squashed over to one side.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Yeah, I know - Picasso. Guernica, right? That's\r\n what everybody says - although personally, I\r\n don't see the resemblance. What are you\r\n drinking?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Uhh - martini?\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Olive or eyeball?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Olive. - Where exactly am I?\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Dark Town. Land of nightmares. I'm Bull.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Stu Miley.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Yeah, I've seen a few of your dreams. You're\r\n quite a celebrity down here.\r\n\r\nSTU gives him a cockeyed look. BULL points to a MONITOR mounted over the\r\nbar, on which a panicked man in pajamas is trying to run barefoot\r\nthrough a great sticky SEA OF MOLASSES.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n I told you, it's the land of nightmares. Same on\r\n every channel...all the stuff people dream,\r\n after they have the extra anchovies.\r\n\r\nHe changes channels with a remote. Now we see a guy falling through\r\nmidair, arms and legs flailing, falling, falling, falling...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Jeez, it all looks like bad late-night cable.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Sad commentary, huh?\r\n\r\nNow a small muffled VOICE speaks from the area of STU'S BACKPACK:\r\n\r\n DISEMBODIED VOICE (o.s.)\r\n \"Bull,\" huh? That's cute. What's your last name\r\n - \"Shit\"??\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n (turning angrily to STU)\r\n I beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I didn't say anything.\r\n\r\n VOICE (o.s.)\r\n Nice face. Lemme guess. You were in a bullfight\r\n ...with a Mack Truck!!\r\n\r\nSTU claps both hands over his mouth to prove he's not the one talking.\r\nBULL glowers at him, snorting STEAM out of both nostrils.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I was, uh, just getting ready to leave...\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Yo, Jumbo. We got us some kind of ventriloquist\r\n here.\r\n\r\nThe ELEPHANT GOD from the Wurlitzer organ comes lumbering over.\r\n\r\n VOICE (o.s.)\r\n Well, hello, sailor. Get a lot of dates with\r\n that ding-dong on your face??\r\n\r\nBULL and JUMBO rear back to PUNCH STU'S LIGHTS OUT. He's saying his\r\nprayers when his BACKPACK begins to BULGE and QUIVER - and a SMALL FURRY\r\nBEAST pops out, CACKLING HIS HEAD OFF!!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Just kiddin', folks! Drinks for everybody -\r\n (pointing at STU)\r\n On him!! HIYA, BOSS!!\r\n\r\nBULL and JUMBO back off, STUNNED. The monkey grabs STU'S FACE and plants\r\na big wet SMOOCH right on his NOSE. STU SCREAMS.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL ROOM - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nTIGHT ON an EEG monitor. There's a sudden BLIP on the readout.\r\n\r\n NURSE\r\n Just a spike, ma'am. It happens. It's perfectly\r\n natural with coma patients.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I'm a doctor too. I know this man's brain -\r\n\r\nJULIE strokes STU's limp hand. He's COMATOSE, cocooned in a tangle of\r\nwires and tubes. His head and shoulders are heavily bandaged. He's\r\nhooked up to as much machinery as you can cram into one room.\r\n\r\n DOCTOR\r\n Go home, Doctor. Rest. Come back when you can do\r\n us some good.\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL - WAITING ROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nDead on her feet, JULIE stumbles toward the exit. As she's leaving she\r\npasses the WAITING ROOM -\r\n\r\n WOMAN'S VOICE\r\n Julie?\r\n\r\nShe turns and sees an older colleague from work - ALICE - waiting in the\r\ndoorway. Hovering right behind ALICE is HERB. And behind him -\r\n\r\nIt appears that almost everyone in the waiting room is a friend of JULIE\r\nand STU's. Disheveled and groggy, they rouse themselves and make their\r\nway over to JULIE's side. She's overcome with emotion.\r\n\r\nINT. STU & JULIE'S HOUSE - ENTRY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe sound of the key in the lock is met by INSANE BARKING. JULIE and\r\nALICE enter and are met by BUSTER, the pet basset - jumping and yipping\r\nlike crazy after 24 hours without food or human company.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Now don't pick a fight. I'm staying over.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Oh, poor Buster. He hasn't been fed in a day and\r\n a half. Let me get some food...\r\n\r\nALICE kneels to play with the dog. She hears a sudden GASP from the\r\nkitchen. JULIE is standing by the open refrigerator, wearing an\r\nabsolutely stricken expression...\r\n\r\nINT. KITCHEN - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nALICE finds JULIE holding a bottle of champagne - Veuve Clicquot La\r\nGrande Dame 1989 - all wrapped up in a bow and ribbon.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Special occasion?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I don't know. I guess it was...\r\n\r\nShe bursts into tears. ALICE sits her down at the kitchen table and\r\ntakes the champagne from her.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Don't get all poignant. We're keeping this\r\n bottle on ice. When he comes around you're going\r\n to need it.\r\n\r\nINT. BATHROOM - LATER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA limp JULIE soaking in a steamy tub, one arm dangling over the side. On\r\nthe vanity is a framed PHOTO STRIP, four poses for a dollar. In the\r\nfirst three, STU and JULIE are making outrageously goony faces. In the\r\nfourth, they imitate the stern-faced farm couple from American Gothic.\r\n\r\nShe gazes at it for a long, long time. Eventually she smiles.\r\n\r\nINT. SECOND BEDROOM/STUDIO - NIGHT\r\n\r\nOPEN on two PHOTOS, mounted in a single frame. On the left, BUSTER\r\nKEATON, droopy-eyed, in his familiar porkpie hat and vest. On the right,\r\na Photoshopped image of BUSTER THE BASSETT HOUND, in the same pose, also\r\nwearing Keaton's hat and vest.\r\n\r\nThese photos are on the wall of the cramped room which serves as STU's\r\nstudio and JULIE's office. MONKEYBONE STRIPS are scattered across the\r\ndrafting table. ALICE is making up the sofa as a guest bed.\r\n\r\nAs she's hanging her coat in the closet she comes across an ACRYLIC\r\nCANVAS in the back, stashed behind a battered portfolio and a box full\r\nof spiral-bound sketchbooks. She pulls it out. She's obviously disturbed\r\nby it, but she can't tear her eyes away...\r\n\r\nShe's still gaping at the painting when JULIE enters in a terrycloth\r\nrobe.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Who did this?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu. That was right about the time we met.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n When he first came in to the sleep lab?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Yeah...before your time.\r\n\r\nThe canvas depicts a group of SURGEONS with the faces of wolves. They're\r\nstanding over a HUMAN PATIENT, replacing his internal organs with\r\nMACHINE PARTS. The style is at once cartoony and unsettling.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Jesus, honey...he always joked about you curing\r\n him, but I never realized what you cured him\r\n from.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n He hadn't gotten a good night's sleep in years.\r\n The nightmares would wake him up, and he'd start\r\n right in painting...\r\n (chuckling)\r\n That boy looked like pluperfect hell.\r\n\r\nALICE's gaze goes from the nightmare paintings to the MONKEYBONE strips\r\ntacked up over the drafting table.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n How do you get from here - to there?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Switch hands.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n What?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I'm serious. It was bicameral disjunction -\r\n right brain and left brain out of balance. He\r\n was a rightie, so I made him switch the pencil\r\n to his left hand. Just to see what'd come out.\r\n\r\nA smile comes to JULIE's face. She settles in on the floor beside ALICE\r\nand digs through the various portfolios until she comes up with a\r\nquickie CARTOON on the back of a napkin - the prototype for...\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Monkeybone?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Left-handed, he was funny. He'd been doing all\r\n this scary, intense work...then he found out he\r\n could draw this stuff, and make me laugh, and he\r\n liked that.\r\n (shrugging)\r\n And then the nightmares just...stopped.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Wow - two guys in the same brain. - Which one\r\n did you fall in love with?\r\n\r\nJULIE smiles at the cartoon. She isn't telling.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I've put a ton of work into that boy, Alice. I\r\n am not going to let him get away from me.\r\n\r\nINT. ICU - MORNING\r\n\r\nJULIE, in her white lab coat, wanders through Intensive Care and finds a\r\nWOMAN hunched over STU's bed, BAWLING HER EYES OUT.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Kimmy...?\r\n\r\nKIMMY looks up. She's crying so much she can barely recognize JULIE.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Oh, Julie...my poor Stu...my poor baby\r\n brother...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n When'd you get in?\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n An hour ago.\r\n (gathering herself)\r\n I tried to prepare myself, but I didn't know he\r\n would be like, like this. I can't even bear to\r\n look at him... How about you? You're okay?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I'm fine, Kimmy. Fine.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n I had so much I always wanted to say to him. At\r\n least he had a chance to give you the ring.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n The ring...\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Grandmama's ring. The engagement ring. He asked\r\n me to send it to him -\r\n\r\nJULIE turns to look at STU in the bed. The certain knowledge that he was\r\nabout to propose is like a knife in her heart. KIMMY feels bad as well,\r\nhaving let the cat out of the bag, but before they can hash it out -\r\n\r\n VOICE FROM BEHIND\r\n Mrs. Brewster? Julie? I'm Dr. Edelstein.\r\n\r\nCheery DR. EDELSTEIN enters. He shakes hands with the women, then checks\r\nSTU's readouts, making notations on his clipboard.\r\n\r\n DR. EDELSTEIN\r\n Vital signs have stabilized. That's good.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Can you give us a realistic sense of my\r\n brother's chances?\r\n\r\n DR. EDELSTEIN\r\n He's held on this far. We can't do much but wait\r\n and see.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n But these...machines are what's keeping him\r\n alive, is that right?\r\n\r\nThis remark sends a shiver down JULIE's spine, but she keeps silent.\r\n\r\n DR. EDELSTEIN\r\n At the moment, yes.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Can you give me a realistic idea...of how long\r\n this is going to last?\r\n\r\n DR. EDELSTEIN\r\n Comas are unpredictable. He could wake up today,\r\n tomorrow, a month from now...\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Honey, I have to clarify this. The thing is, Dr.\r\n Edelstein, my brother has an absolute horror of\r\n doctors - hospitals - needles - all of it -\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Kimmy, he doesn't know what's going on. He\r\n doesn't even know he's in a -\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Please, Julie. This is not easy for me. Our\r\n father took a long time to die. A long time. It\r\n just about killed us all. And Stu and I made a\r\n pact that when our time came - we wouldn't let\r\n it drag out.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n It's too soon even to - talk about that!\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n Give me a date, Doctor.\r\n\r\n DR. EDELSTEIN\r\n Three months.\r\n (pause)\r\n There's always some brain damage. But at three\r\n months...the chances of coming back shrink\r\n dramatically with every day.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n I want him to have every chance, Doctor. We can\r\n certainly give it...three months.\r\n\r\nNo one says anything. But both women look at STU, and then at each\r\nother, and everyone knows exactly where everyone else stands. JULIE has\r\na sinking feeling that STU is working on a 3-month deadline.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINSERT - TELEVISION SCREEN\r\n\r\nA beauty pageant - shapely INGENUES in EVENING GOWNS being introduced by\r\nan EMCEE with enormous teeth.\r\n\r\n EMCEE\r\n And now the last of our five finalists...Miss\r\n Michigan...GEORGE T. WILLOUGHBY!\r\n\r\nGEORGE is a pudgy shmoe with a small pencil mustache who's wearing\r\nglasses, a necktie, and NOTHING ELSE. He steps forward, holding a\r\nbriefcase in front of his crotch, looking EXTREMELY MORTIFIED.\r\n\r\n EMCEE\r\n And now George will give us his analysis of\r\n Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle as it\r\n pertains to third-world economics!!\r\n\r\nCAMERA PULLS BACK - and we realize we're in:\r\n\r\nINT. COMA BAR - NIGHT\r\n\r\nwhere BULL the BARTENDER and a number of PATRONS are watching GEORGE's\r\nnightmare on the TV mounted over the bar.\r\n\r\nOnscreen, NUDE GEORGE is sweating bullets. He has no idea what to say,\r\nand the audience is beginning to laugh at him. In a desperate, feeble\r\nattempt to buy time...he begins to SING.\r\n\r\n GEORGE\r\n I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair!\r\n\r\nIn fact he goes into a little softshoe, keeping the briefcase poised\r\nover his crotch. Unfortunately, THE CASE POPS OPEN, dumping frilly\r\nLINGERIE all over the stage. The weeping GEORGE must crawl around on all\r\nfours to retrieve it...\r\n\r\nBy now the onlookers at the bar are CRACKING UP. All except one - the\r\nlonely, disconsolate fellow on the last stool, nursing a martini - STU.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Hey, Stu, why so glum? Everybody loves a good\r\n humiliation nightmare.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Three months, Bull. Three months tonight. Three\r\n months since the accident - and I'm no closer to\r\n going home than I was then.\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n Aw, buck up. Have another 'tini.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'm sick of martinis. I'm sick of the waiting,\r\n and the carnival rides, and watching people's\r\n nightmares. And of course, I need not add -\r\n\r\nHe GRIMACES at MONKEYBONE, who's stretched out atop the mighty Wurlitzer\r\nat the other end of the room. The MERMAID CHANTEUSE is singing a\r\nDietrich number, \"The Laziest Gal in Town\" - or at least trying to,\r\nbecause MONKEYBONE is caterwauling behind her. By the time she gets to\r\nthe grand finale, he's practically BAYING AT THE MOON.\r\n\r\nPissed off, she SHAKES her FIST at MONKEYBONE and pulls the lid of her\r\nclamshell SHUT. This suits MONKEYBONE just fine, as it leaves him alone\r\nin the spotlight to soak up what little applause there is.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Thank you, thank you for that very modest\r\n response. I know you're all in comas, but still.\r\n And now...it's dedication time!\r\n\r\nHe gestures to JUMBO, the elephant organist, who begins to vamp.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n We've got a special dedication tonight. This\r\n one's from my ever-lovin' boss, Mr. Stu Mopey -\r\n I mean Miley - and we're sendin' it up to\r\n a very special lady in the land of the living.\r\n Yes, I do mean Julie - the beautiful Miss Julie\r\n - who, if she has a brain in her head, is\r\n shacked up right now with some good-lookin' doc\r\n she met in the E.R.!\r\n (pointing at STU)\r\n JUST KIDDING, BUDDY! Because if we know anything\r\n about Miss Julie, we know she is faithful,\r\n loyal, and true. Even if her boyfriend is an\r\n eggplant. Which is why we're dedicating...this\r\n very special tune...to her. Jumbo?\r\n\r\nJUMBO's tasteful vamping gives way to a RAUNCHY ROCK BEAT - and\r\nMONKEYBONE begins STRUTTING across the top of the piano, bumping and\r\ngrinding and shaking his booty to the tune of -\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n MAH baby does the Hanky-Panky! UNHH!\r\n MAH baby does the Hanky-Panky! UNHH!\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE sings the same poignant line over and over until STU comes\r\nstorming over from the bar and YANKS HIM off the Wurlitzer by the scruff\r\nof his scrawny NECK.\r\n\r\nA trouper to the end, MONKEYBONE WAVES at the crowd even as STU drags\r\nhim off to an empty table in the farthest corner of the room.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You have humiliated me in public for the last\r\n time.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I doubt that. Besides, I can't help myself. I'm\r\n just a figment of your imagination.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Then you can learn to act normally. I had to!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Aw, come on. You know you love me. You're a\r\n masochistic pain freak. You gotta love me.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I am not. And I don't gotta.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE waves and winks at every female who passes by. STU whacks him\r\nupside the head.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n You are too! Mooning over Julie when we could\r\n both be gettin' some o' this fine local action.\r\n It's not like she's gonna know. Out of town,\r\n under five minutes, and in a coma don't count.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Sorry. The women here aren't my type. Most of\r\n them aren't even my species.\r\n\r\nCocktail waitress KITTY, a seven-foot cat-faced feline sex bomb, arrives\r\nin her skimpy black dress and shows STU a Cheshire-cat grin. MONKEYBONE\r\nreclines, Odalisque-style, on the table.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Hellooooooooo, Kitty.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Hiya, Stu. Refill on that martini?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I'd like something with an umbrella in it and a\r\n really smutty name. Like a...Sex Behind the Sofa\r\n with Your Parents in the Same Room Watching \"The\r\n Brady Bunch.\"\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Nothing for him! He's being repressed.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Is something wrong, Stu? You seem so tense.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Aaah, it's the same as always...poor mope's just\r\n wishin' he was me.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I've been trying to get through to the head guy\r\n - the nightmare god - what's his name?\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Hypnos?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Yeah. To see if he could expedite my case. But I\r\n wait, and I wait, and...I'm starting to think\r\n I'll never see her again.\r\n\r\nA softie at heart, KITTY sits across from STU and takes his hand.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I shoulda proposed, Kitty. That way at least\r\n she'd know how I feel. That way she'd...wait for\r\n me.\r\n\r\nShe leans forward sympathetically. From this particular vantage,\r\nMONKEYBONE has an unobstructed view of KITTY's cleavage. And so does STU\r\n- although he's not quite as obvious about staring.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n She is waiting for you, Stu. I know she is. Guys\r\n like you don't come along that often. Believe\r\n me, I know.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE slinks over behind STU - up onto his shoulder - and whispers\r\ninto his ear:\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n My Fellow Americans. I have a dream. Let us\r\n boldly go where no man has gone before.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n (trying to ignore him)\r\n I'm sorry, Kitty - what were you saying?\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n I mean it, Stu. You're one in a million.\r\n\r\nKITTY is holding the cleavage pose for an unnaturally long time. Her\r\nfurry tail begins to swing back and forth playfully in the air. It's\r\nhypnotic - like a windshield wiper.\r\n\r\nSTU stares at it. MONKEYBONE stares at it. And MONKEYBONE'S TAIL\r\nresponds by straightening...stiffening...bending upward slightly.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'm not so special. I'm just - kind of -\r\n\r\nSTU is suddenly aware of something LONG, RED, and WET unrolling onto his\r\nshoulder. It's a TONGUE...dangling out of MONKEYBONE'S OPEN MOUTH. STU\r\nlets out a YOWL OF SHOCK.\r\n\r\nBlushing bright red, he GRABS THE TONGUE and shoves it manually back\r\ninto the monkey mouth whence it came.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Come on, pal! It was a compliment! You'da done\r\n the same if you had the equipment!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n THAT DOES IT! BACK IN THE PACK!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n FORGET IT! NO WAY! I'M NOT GETTING -\r\n\r\nSTU LUNGES at MONKEYBONE - who JUMPS OVER HIM, BOUNDS off the edge of\r\nthe table, and grabs hold of a CHANDELIER.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I'm reportin' this to my union!!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n What union?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n The sidekicks' union! Me, Tonto, and Robin the\r\n Boy Wonder. You top bananas better watch your\r\n ass!\r\n\r\nSTU grabs a CHAIR and swings it at the chandelier. MONKEYBONE makes a\r\nseries of SUBMARINE NOISES -\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n DIVE! DIVE!!\r\n\r\n- and DIVES - directly between KITTY's breasts into her skimpy black\r\ndress!! STU circles around KITTY, following the undulating monkey-sized\r\nBLOB that's tunnelling around under her dress. Finally MONKEYBONE pops\r\nout of the BACK of the dress and NUZZLES KITTY'S EAR:\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I left my phone number in your undies. Try not\r\n to lose it in traffic.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Sorry, Kitty! I'll be right back after I choke\r\n my monkey.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE runs under the pool table. STU is giving chase when -\r\nsuddenly - a DOOR blows open in the chill night wind.\r\n\r\nEVERYONE IN THE BAR freezes in place.\r\n\r\nFor there, in the doorway, is a looming, ominous figure - the most\r\ndreaded figure in all of Dark Town -\r\n\r\n- a GRIM REAPER, nine feet tall and swinging a scythe, come to take some\r\nhapless coma victim to the land of Death!\r\n\r\nEERIE WINDS WHISTLE and the shroud FLUTTERS in the night breeze as the\r\nREAPER looks from face to face. For a moment he focuses on STU. STU\r\nbacks away involuntarily, with a mounting sense of dread...and\r\nMONKEYBONE jumps into his arms, clinging to him fearfully.\r\n\r\nBut the REAPER moves on - past each COMA VICTIM in turn - finally\r\nSTOPPING in front of a TINY, WIZENED, PRUNELIKE OLD GENT in a\r\nwheelchair, who looks to be 110 years old at least.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Him. Whew. About time!\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n EARL BIEGLER. I'VE COME -\r\n\r\n EARL\r\n Can't hear you, young fellow. Speak up!\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n EARL BIEGLER, I'VE COME TO GIVE YOU - aw, hell.\r\n Here.\r\n\r\nGASPS OF ANTICIPATION all around the room as the REAPER hands EARL a\r\nlong white ENVELOPE. EARL opens it slowly and removes...\r\n\r\n...an oversized rectangular TICKET...the size of a Hershey bar, made of\r\nSOLID GOLD, with the letter \"E\" stamped upon it.\r\n\r\nVARIOUS CHARACTERS around the barroom react, in hushed voices:\r\n\r\n BULL\r\n An E-Ticket!\r\n\r\n PATRON\r\n He got a reprieve.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Good for him! He's gonna wake up!\r\n\r\nEARL throws his crutches aside, jumps out of his chair, and DANCES A\r\nJIG, waving the ticket over his head. STU stares at him with naked envy.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n No. No. Not him.\r\n\r\n EARL\r\n So long, suckers! See you in the funny papers!\r\n\r\nEARL does an end-zone dance toward the door. One by one, OTHER PATRONS\r\nget up from their seats to watch EARL's departure.\r\n\r\nEXT. COMA BAR - STREETS - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe COMA VICTIMS shuffle toward a BIG RIDE across the midway.\r\n\r\nIt's a \"TEST YOUR STRENGTH\" machine - the kind where you slam down a\r\nmallet and try to ring the bell. It's surrounded by crocodile moats and\r\nstorm fences and electrified barbed wire, and a big sign reading PRIVATE\r\n- NO ADMITTANCE.\r\n\r\nEARL, still jubilant, inserts his E-ticket into a receptacle at the\r\nentrance. A DRAWBRIDGE LOWERS, and CAROUSEL MUSIC cranks up, and\r\nCARNIVAL LIGHTS blink on, and FIREWORKS rocket into the sky...\r\n\r\nAll around them, faces turn skyward. CLOUDS are parting. An EDDY of\r\nswirling colors is forming DIRECTLY ABOVE the E-ticket ride - and a\r\nPINPOINT HOLE opens up at its center.\r\n\r\nThe \"TEST YOUR STRENGTH\" machine has been outfitted with a SEAT where\r\nthe bell-ringer should be. Once EARL has settled in, a GIANT MECHANICAL\r\nMAN lifts its enormous mallet...\r\n\r\n...and SLAMS IT DOWN on the lever end of the machine, sending EARL\r\nROCKETING UPWARD toward the hole in the sky. DING!! The SEAT hits the\r\nBELL, but EARL keeps going - up - up - UP...\r\n\r\nThen, with a distinct POP, he's gone. Over the rainbow...home.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n He's ninety. He's practically dead already. How\r\n come he goes back and I stay here?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Maybe he wanted to pick out his own casket?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n (turning abruptly)\r\n HEY!! HEY, YOU!!\r\n\r\nSTU marches across the street to the GRIM REAPER - who's climbing onto\r\nhis WINGED BICYCLE and seems shocked that anyone would want to chat with\r\nhim. MONKEYBONE scurries alongside, terrified.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n He got an E-ticket. Where's mine? When do I get\r\n to wake up??\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu? Stu? Let's not disturb the nice Reaper.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I've been stuck down here for months. Somebody\r\n had better start paying attention, or I'm gonna\r\n - I'm gonna kick ass!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Let's not kick the nice Reaper's ass.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE practically swoons. But the REAPER just stares at STU:\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n SORRY, BUD. OFF-DUTY.\r\n\r\nThe REAPER climbs onto his winged bike and PEDALS OFF down the midway.\r\nSTU lets out a HOWL OF FRUSTRATION.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu? Stu? Let's calm down, talk things over. How\r\n about some comedy relief? Okay. Brontosaurus\r\n walks into a gay bar...\r\n\r\nSTU BOOTS MONKEYBONE aside. They're at a GAME STALL manned by Elsie the\r\nCow - the one where you throw baseballs at milk bottles. STU picks up a\r\nbaseball and HURLS IT at the departing REAPER.\r\n\r\nThe ball hits the REAPER smack on the head, knocking him off his bike!\r\n\r\n STU/MONKEYBONE\r\n (in unison - impressed)\r\n Damn.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE cowers in fear as the REAPER gets up, shaking a fist at them.\r\nBut STU isn't intimidated. He grabs another ball and winds up.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu? Stu? I think weve got this backwards. Your\r\n behavior...is disturbing me.\r\n\r\nThe REAPER, scared shitless, jumps back on his bike and PEDALS OFF as\r\nthe ball whizzes past. STU starts chasing after him!\r\n\r\nThe REAPER turns down a side street and pedals up an incline - one of\r\nthe \"fingers\" of the hand that holds Dark Town. When the bike hits the\r\nend of the finger, it TAKES OFF into the void and KEEPS ON GOING.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n That's right. Run! And don't come back unless\r\n you've got my e-ticket!!\r\n\r\nThe REAPER vanishes. STU sits dejectedly on the edge of the curb.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Who am I kidding? I'm never gonna get out of\r\n here. I'll never see her again.\r\n\r\nJust then, a multi-armed MESSENGER BOY in royal livery toodles past on a\r\nCHILD'S SCOOTER. He stops...\r\n\r\n MESSENGER BOY\r\n Miley? Stu Miley?\r\n\r\nSTU looks up. Six arms reach into six pockets. Finally the MESSENGER\r\nfinds an ENVELOPE and hands it over. Inside is an ENGRAVED INVITATION:\r\n\r\n YOU Are Invited to a\r\n PAJAMA PARTY\r\n at HYPNOS' HIDEAWAY\r\n Penthouse Suite - 10 PM Sharp\r\n \"If You Snooze, You Lose\"\r\n\r\nSTU'S EYES widen with excitement as the MESSENGER scoots off.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hypnos! The god of nightmares! Do you know what\r\n this means, Monkeybone? He's finally going to\r\n hear my case. I'm going home!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S PRIVATE ROOM - MORNING\r\n\r\nAs she's done every morning for the last three months, JULIE brushes\r\nSTU'S TEETH. Although she looks a bit more worn and haggard than when we\r\nsaw her last, she always affects a cheerful manner around STU - on the\r\noff chance that he might be aware of her presence.\r\n\r\nShe packs the toothbrush away, runs a hand along his stubbly cheek.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I think we can go another day without shaving.\r\n Long as you don't look like you're growing one\r\n of those stupid little goatees.\r\n\r\nShe opens up the entertainment section of the daily newspaper.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Hey, there's an article about the Monkeybone\r\n show. They've run that one episode about eight\r\n times now. Herb says it gets higher ratings\r\n every time...they're hoping you'll give 'em some\r\n new material soon...\r\n (long, bored pause)\r\n Wanna hear another joke?\r\n\r\nShe refolds the paper and reaches into a bedside drawer for a paperback\r\nentitled The Book of Raunch. She pages through it for a moment.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Okay...let me see...here we go. A plane full of\r\n explorers crashlands in New Guinea; they are\r\n captured by a cannibal tribe and taken to the\r\n chief's hut, where...wait a minute. I know this\r\n one...\r\n (reading ahead)\r\n You stinker! You swiped this joke for a\r\n Monkeybone strip!\r\n\r\nShe whacks him on the arm with the book. No response at all.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Okay. Let's try again. Why did the pervert cross\r\n the road?\r\n\r\nThe sound of SOBBING interrupts her joke. She looks up and sees KIMMY\r\nstanding in the doorway, red-eyed and crying.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Kimmy! What's the matter?\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n This is hard for me, Julie...very hard...but\r\n it's been three months now, and...\r\n (long pause)\r\n I gave the order.\r\n\r\nJULIE just stares at her for a beat or two, refusing to understand. Then\r\nit sinks in. Her hand goes to her mouth in horror and grief.\r\n\r\n FADE THROUGH TO:\r\n\r\nEXT. HYPNOSPIRE - ESTABLISHING - NIGHT\r\n\r\nCAMERA TRACKS up the seemingly endless length of the HYPNOSPIRE - up,\r\nup, THROUGH a heavy layer of clouds, to the ROTATING PENTHOUSE DOME of\r\nthe building...\r\n\r\n...which is festooned with oodles of 18-INCH DSS SATELLITE DISHES.\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nELEVATOR DOORS open, and we glide into the swank, swingin', space-age\r\nbachelor pad of HYPNOS, God of Sleep. A giant flying CUPID welcomes us,\r\ntiny bumblebee wings somehow keeping his vast bulk aloft.\r\n\r\nHYP'S HIDEAWAY occupies the entire penthouse floor, and there's always a\r\nparty in full effect. A rotating disco ball flashes colored light on\r\nwalls, floors, and ceilings covered with shockadelic OP-ART PATTERNS.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Now this...is livin'.\r\n\r\nOf course, a party needs party animals - and the DARKTOWNERS on the\r\nscene are in fine fettle, working up a sweat on the dance floor. DJ\r\nSLEEPY ZZZ'S has three turntables spinning at once.\r\n\r\nAs STU wanders through, he gets a big surprise. Reproductions of his old\r\nNIGHTMARE PAINTINGS are hanging on the walls! They've been turned into\r\nONE-SHEETS for the coming attractions at the Morpheum.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Y'call that art? Why, my three-year-old can\r\n paint better than that.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Like you'd know. You started out on the back of\r\n a napkin, you little...doodle.\r\n\r\nScowling at each other, the boys turn their backs and part ways. We\r\nfollow MONKEYBONE to the wet bar, where he almost immediately bumps into\r\na statuesque GORGON with a full head of writhing SNAKES.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Hey! Like the do. So tell me, are you a, uhh...\r\n natural snakehead?\r\n\r\n GORGON\r\n Only fifty dollars to find out.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Fifty dollars?! Bite me!\r\n\r\n GORGON\r\n You got it, big boy.\r\n\r\nHe grins and shrugs: what the hell. As they head for a back room, the\r\nBARTENDER hands him a SNAKEBITE KIT.\r\n\r\nA look of apprehension crosses MONKEYBONE's face. But before he can\r\nchange his mind, the GORGON'S HAND yanks him out of frame.\r\n\r\nSTU, meanwhile, is crossing the dance floor, moving among glittering\r\nanimal-people who DANCE in their bizarre, uninhibited way. A FIVE-LEGGED\r\nWOMAN - the bottom half of her body a big human HAND - SMILES at STU as\r\nhe passes. He tries to talk to her, but she's dancing, and with five\r\nconstantly moving legs it's difficult to get in close.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Say, have you seen Mr. Hypnos?\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n Hyp? He was here a while ago. Aren't you Stu\r\n Miley? The nightmare guy?\r\n\r\nSTU grins meekly, nods yes. She pulls him over to dance.\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n I heard you were going to be here tonight. This\r\n is so cool!\r\n\r\nJUMBO the ELEPHANT GOD is dancing in ungainly fashion nearby. His trunk\r\nswings out and hits one of the HAND WOMAN'S arms - which SNAPS OFF like\r\nmarble statuary. Before she can let out a squeal, he does it again. Now\r\nshe's armless - a regular Venus de Milo!\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n You fat slob! Watch what you're doing!\r\n\r\n JUMBO\r\n Why don't you slap me? Go on, slap me!\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n Come on, Stu. Let's go where the real fun is.\r\n\r\nShe leads him over to the sunken living room. Among the other guests, we\r\nsee a CYCLOPS, a YETI, a BBQ PIG. A number of sofas and lounge chairs\r\nare arranged around a big crystal ORB in the center of the room.\r\n\r\nThe ORB is where nightmares happen. Although the perspective shifts and\r\nthe locales change abruptly, as in a movie, all the nightmares have a\r\n3-D quality - as if they're taking place right here in the room with us!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Wow. Live feed, huh?\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n You bet. Hyp gets all the best stuff before it\r\n goes out to the theatres.\r\n\r\nSTU grins in anticipation. He finds an empty chair and starts to sit\r\ndown - but there's a SLUG with a MAN'S HEAD already in it!\r\n\r\n SLUG WITH A MAN'S HEAD\r\n HEY!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Sorry.\r\n\r\nSTU picks another seat. The HAND WOMAN sidles up alongside him.\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n Shh! There's a new one just starting.\r\n\r\nEXT. FIELD OF FLOWERS (NIGHTMARE ORB)\r\n\r\nIn long shot we see a handsome young couple dressed in paisley prints.\r\nEmerging from a sylvan glade, they kiss in golden sunlight. Then the MAN\r\nbreaks free - sprints through knee-high sunflowers to the middle of the\r\nfield, where a picnic blanket is waiting.\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - STU\r\n\r\nHIS FACE GOES PALE as he recognizes the man in the paisley shirt.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n That - that's me.\r\n\r\n CYCLOPS\r\n Nice shirt, dude!\r\n\r\nEXT. FIELD OF FLOWERS (NIGHTMARE ORB) - DAY\r\n\r\nPaisley-shirted STU pours champagne for two. Toasts his beloved - who\r\nis, of course, JULIE, the dreamer of the dream.\r\n\r\nHe pulls out a little velvet RING BOX and offers it to her. But when she\r\ntries to take it, he pulls it away, teasing her, and STEALS A KISS.\r\n\r\nSuddenly the two of them are locked in a tight embrace, rolling together\r\nthrough the flowers, LAUGHING, full of joy.\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nThe DARKTOWNERS are rubbing their hands together in anticipation of\r\nhorrors to come. STU looks from one misshapen face to the next, his\r\nheart pounding with dread.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n What is this? Who's dreaming this??\r\n (beat)\r\n Julie??\r\n\r\n YETI\r\n Hey, keep it down!\r\n\r\nEXT. FIELD OF FLOWERS (NIGHTMARE ORB) - DAY\r\n\r\nJULIE rolls onto her back on the grass, FACE AGLOW. Only to realize...\r\nthat STU IS NO LONGER THERE BESIDE HER.\r\n\r\nShe looks around. Gets to her feet. Turns. And the BACKGROUND behind her\r\nMORPHS suddenly into...\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL ROOM (NIGHTMARE ORB)\r\n\r\nThe room is decorated for a FAREWELL PARTY, complete with streamers and\r\nconfetti. KIMMY, DR. EDELSTEIN, various MEDICAL PERSONNEL and FRIENDS\r\nare wearing party hats, lifting champagne glasses in a toast to the\r\nguest of honor...the comatose Stu!\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nThe DARKTOWNERS clustered around the orb can barely conceal their animal\r\nexcitement. It's obvious that the nightmares they're watching are more\r\nthan mere entertainment - they get some kind of addictive, visceral\r\ncharge from the spectacle of human terror.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n JULIE!!\r\n\r\nHe tries to push his way forward to the orb. An angry CYCLOPS elbows him\r\naside. A YETI grabs his coat and pushes him out of the way.\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n Stu!! What are you doing? Chill out!!\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL ROOM (NIGHTMARE ORB)\r\n\r\nCOMATOSE STU stands in the center of the room, UPRIGHT and IMMOBILE in a\r\nparty hat. A weird UMBILICAL CORD extends from his navel to a huge\r\ngroaning BELLOWS DEVICE - like an artificial lung, it's all that keeps\r\nhim breathing.\r\n\r\nEDELSTEIN hands a pair of OVERSIZED CEREMONIAL SCISSORS to KIMMY, and\r\nshe CUTS THE CORD, as if opening a new mall. Applause all around. JULIE\r\nraces toward STU in slo-mo, SHRIEKING -\r\n\r\n- as he DEFLATES into a LIMP PUDDLE OF FLESH before her eyes!!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n No. No. STU!\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - ON STU\r\n\r\nJULIE's distress is killing him. Yet all around him, DARKTOWNERS are\r\ncackling their heads off, growling, howling, punching their fists in the\r\nair like rowdy drunks at a football game. He LOSES IT ALTOGETHER.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n JULIE! I'M HERE, DOC! DON'T LET THEM PULL THE\r\n PLUG! I'M HERE!!!\r\n\r\nHe won't be stopped this time. He makes for the orb - climbing over\r\nsofas, pushing guests aside, knocking over their drinks -\r\n\r\n CYCLOPS\r\n HEY! Watch it, you stinkin' gringo -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n JULIE! I'M HERE! I LOVE YOU!\r\n\r\nSomehow, JULIE has heard him!! Down in the nightmare orb, her dream self\r\nis looking UP, trying to locate the source of STU's disembodied voice!\r\nHe struggles to reach the orb, but the CYCLOPS is holding him back.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu? STU...?\r\n\r\nSTU breaks free and FLINGS HIMSELF on the ORB - which SHORTS OUT in a\r\nhaze of smoke and sparks, abruptly ending the nightmare. JULIE's image\r\nvanishes - and STU gropes at the air, DESPAIRING.\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S PRIVATE ROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe real JULIE awakens suddenly and lets out a scream of her own.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n STU!!!!\r\n\r\nOnly now does she realize where she is. She's fallen asleep in the\r\nvisitor's chair next to STU's bed. The clock on the wall reads 1:15 AM.\r\n\r\nSTU'S READOUTS are spiking like crazy.\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU is being dragged across the dance floor by the YETI and JUMBO THE\r\nELEPHANT GOD. HAND WOMAN brings up the rear.\r\n\r\n JUMBO\r\n Who invited this schmuck, anyway?\r\n\r\n HAND WOMAN\r\n Oh, it's my fault. I thought he was cooler than\r\n that.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Listen. Please. It's my girlfriend. I've gotta\r\n get a message to her...\r\n\r\nBut just then a hush falls over the room, and someone screams...\r\n\r\n WOMAN'S VOICE\r\n HYP!!!\r\n\r\nA WALL PANEL does a 180-degree turn, and a CIRCULAR BED rotates into the\r\nroom. Languishing atop it, garbed in a silk robe which exactly matches\r\nthe black & white checkerboard pattern of the bedspread...\r\n\r\n...is a CHUBBY, GRINNING, SLEEPY-EYED SATYR, with horns and hooves. TWO\r\nWASP WOMEN are with him on the bed, brushing his furry goat legs and\r\nfeeding him grapes.\r\n\r\nAs STU fights his way over, he sees an odd LUMP wriggling under the\r\nbedcovers. Out pops MONKEYBONE, clutching a bottle of champagne!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I knew I left it in there somewhere.\r\n\r\nHe shakes the bottle, pops the cork, and SPRAYS SPURTING BUBBLY at\r\nHYPNOS, the GIRLS, and everyone else within firing range!\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Haw! I like a monkey with vision!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n You said it, partner!\r\n\r\nHilarity all around. STU snatches MONKEYBONE off the bed -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n How'd you get in there?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu... It's a party.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Mr. Hypnos - sir - I needed to talk to you -\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Wait a minute. Stu Miley, right? Boys and girls\r\n ...Mr. Stu Miley, in the house!\r\n (leading a round of applause)\r\n This is an honor. We see a lot of nightmares\r\n down here, but yours are like caviar, man. You\r\n da shits!!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Mr. Hypnos, I saw a dream. My girlfriend was\r\n having it. She dreamed they were pulling the\r\n plug on me. She was watching me die.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Uh huh. And?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Well, I have to get a message to her. I have to\r\n let her know I'm okay. Until I can get out of\r\n here...\r\n\r\nA vaguely embarrassed look crosses HYPNOS's face. All the nearby\r\nDARKTOWNERS stare at their shoes, clear their throats.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n ...which is actually what I wanted to talk to\r\n you about. See, I've been here three months -\r\n\r\nWith a brusque gesture, HYPNOS sends the party girls packing. He slings\r\none arm around STU's shoulder and pulls him aside.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Kid - didn't they tell you about this party?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Tell me what?\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n It's a special kind of party. A farewell party.\r\n Do you...get what I'm saying?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Farewell? You mean - you mean I'm -\r\n\r\nSTU EXPLODES WITH JOY. He practically dances a jig.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'M GOING HOME! I'M WAKING UP! HEY, EVERYBODY!\r\n I'M OUTTA HERE. I...\r\n\r\nOne by one, the celebrants turn their backs and slink discreetly away.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I think I...I'm about to... Am I mistaken, or\r\n don't I get to... Is there some...\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Y'see, Stu, as I understand it, you made this\r\n pact with your sister...no life support?\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE's jaw drops. He slaps himself across the forehead.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Pact? Pact? NO LIFE SUPPORT??\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Well - yeah - but that doesn't...apply. It was\r\n different then. I was depressed. My life is\r\n great now. I'm in love!\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE marches back and forth across the bed, wearing a dimwit's\r\nexpression as he MOCKS STU in a singsongy voice...\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Pull the plug! Pull the plug! Take my organs! I\r\n don't need 'em! I don't need no! Life support!\r\n I'm an idiot! Pull the pl--\r\n\r\nSTU grabs the monkey and clamps a hand over his mouth.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Besides, Julie wouldn't...she'd never...\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Actually, Stu, Julie doesn't get to decide.\r\n That's why she was having the nightmare.\r\n (an embarrassed shrug)\r\n They're pulling the plug at nine AM.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Nine AM! But that's - twelve hours.\r\n\r\nIn checking his watch, STU removes his hand from MONKEYBONE's mouth. The\r\nsingsong resumes...\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I'm so dumb! I deserve to die -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Mr. Hypnos, you run this place. I'm begging you.\r\n There's gotta be something I can do.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Stu, I like you personally, I admire your work,\r\n but I'm just the God of Sleep. This is Death's\r\n bailiwick.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Maybe you could talk to Death!\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Me? Me, go crawling to Death? My friend, it will\r\n be a cold, cold day in Las Vegas, Nevada, before\r\n I go crawling to that piece of -\r\n\r\nHYP shuts up. Looks around the room, as if he's afraid of being\r\noverheard. Then he gestures to the boys to join him on the bed.\r\n\r\nThey climb aboard eagerly. HYPNOS hits his remote...\r\n\r\nINT. HYPNOS'S BEDROOM - ON BED\r\n\r\n...and they rotate AWAY from the party. Privacy at last.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Now Death is not what you would call a people\r\n person, like me. Death is a putz - and I should\r\n know. I'm his little brother.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You're Death's brother?\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Oh yeah. Mr. By-the-book, Stick-Up-the-Ass, My-\r\n Way-or-the-Highway Death. Believe me - over the\r\n course of eternity, you get pretty damned tired\r\n of that schtick.\r\n (spreading his hands)\r\n So I need a job. He sticks me in this broke-down\r\n amusement park, with a buncha animals to run it.\r\n I'm supposed to be grateful?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n The penthouse is pretty swank, though.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Thank you. I decorated it myself.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Guys, I don't mean to be rude, but I only have\r\n eleven hours and fifty-three minutes to...\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Oh, right. Cheating Death. There's one thing you\r\n might try. Only one guy in history ever pulled\r\n it off. Well, actually two. Actually, no, there\r\n was that other guy who...well, very few people\r\n have done it.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hyp, I'll do anything.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Me too. And I mean anything. Ask the chicks in\r\n the back room.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n You've seen those E-tickets, right? Well, what\r\n you gotta do...is go into the Land of Death...\r\n and steal an E-ticket right out from under\r\n Death's nose.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Land of Death. How do I get there?\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Kid, listen: that's all I'm saying. And you\r\n didn't hear it from me.\r\n\r\nHYP hits the remote. The bed begins to ROTATE OUTWARD again.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n You've heard of a fate worse than Death? That's\r\n what's waiting for you if you screw up.\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nHYP gives the boys a wink and a thumbs-up, then wanders off to shmooze\r\nhis other guests. MONKEYBONE shakes STU's hand.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Fate worse than death! Well, it's been real,\r\n boss, but I gotta go buff up my resumé. ANYBODY\r\n HERE NEED A FIGMENT?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Fine! Don't put yourself out. I'll go to the\r\n land of Death alone.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu, you have my absolute confidence. - DEAD\r\n MAN! DEAD MAN WALKING!!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n (grabbing him by the throat)\r\n I've got one chance to get back to Julie, and\r\n I'm gonna take it - with or without you.\r\n\r\nHe turns and stalks off. MONKEYBONE stands there blinking.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Hey. Aren't you gonna talk me into it?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n No. Goodbye. Thanks for nothing.\r\n\r\nStunned, MONKEYBONE scurries along behind him, PLEADING.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n You gotta talk me into it. You'll screw up on\r\n your own. I mean, a guy's gotta have a sidekick.\r\n For moral support! Wisecracks - snappy banter -\r\n (wrapping himself around STU's leg)\r\n It's the land of Death, Stu, the Land of Death!\r\n Don't go in there without your comedy relief!!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n All right. You can come.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n OH, THANK YOU! THANK YOU! TH--\r\n (suddenly realizing)\r\n Something went very, very wrong here.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Now we just gotta figure out how to get there.\r\n\r\nAs if in reply, a PALE, SPECTRAL PRESENCE comes drifting across the\r\ndance floor - an eight-foot-tall GRIM REAPER.\r\n\r\nThe boys duck behind a POTTED PLANT to watch as he zeroes in on the WET\r\nBAR - where a beautiful coma victim, LULU, is drunkenly making out with\r\nanother sloshed corpse-to-be, FRED.\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n LULU LA RUE. I HAVE COME FOR YOU.\r\n\r\nLULU doesn't notice. She continues grappling with FRED. Muttering, the\r\nREAPER dives in and tries to disentangle them.\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n LULU LA RUE, I HAVE COME FOR -\r\n\r\n LULU\r\n Shay, you're kinda cute.\r\n\r\nShe ditches FRED and throws her arms around the REAPER. Repulsed, he\r\npushes her away, props her against the nearest wall -\r\n\r\n- and TOUCHES HER with one bony finger above the heart! It's like\r\nthrowing a switch. Her body stiffens. Her EYES cross. Her TONGUE droops\r\nout of her mouth. She makes a noise like a DIAL TONE.\r\n\r\nThe true horror of death is that it makes you look like a total idiot.\r\nThe REAPER pulls a collapsible HAND TRUCK from beneath his shroud and\r\nstarts maneuvering LULU onto it.\r\n\r\n FRED\r\n Say there. How 'bout one for the road?\r\n\r\nThe REAPER ignores him. FRED holds up a cocktail glass.\r\n\r\n FRED\r\n Hold this for me, pally.\r\n\r\nThe REAPER heaves a sigh and takes the cocktail glass. FRED grabs a\r\npitcher filled with some luminescent tropical concoction...\r\n\r\n...and POURS IT down the REAPER's front!\r\n\r\n FRED\r\n Ooopsy daisy.\r\n\r\nON STU AND MONKEYBONE - BEHIND THE PLANT\r\n\r\nWINCING at the REAPER in his sopping wet, pink-stained shroud.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Is that what they call \"death with dignity\"?\r\n\r\nThe REAPER wrings out his shroud and grabs the hand truck. As he wheels\r\nLULU past the boys, MONKEYBONE pops up with a helpful hint:\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Two words for you, my friend: club soda.\r\n\r\nSTU claps a hand over MB's mouth as the REAPER turns down a hall.\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN GATES - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe still-muttering REAPER wheels LULU toward the entrance to Dark Town.\r\nThe boys are skulking along behind him at a discreet distance.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n He's taking her to the land of Death, right? So\r\n all we've gotta do is...hitch a ride!\r\n (beat)\r\n Stop shaking! I'll protect you.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Oh, sure. Mr. Action Hero! Why couldn't I be\r\n Arnold Schwarzenegger's figment?\r\n\r\nThe REAPER approaches the GATES. He presses a remote-control BEEPER and\r\nthe meshing teeth of the gates slide back far enough to let him pass\r\nthrough.\r\n\r\nSTU realizes they've only got an instant to make their move. He DIVES\r\nthrough the gates at top speed. As soon as he's on the other side, he\r\nhears a nasty CLANG behind him...\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE is caught - his body contorted like a pretzel, woven in and\r\nout among the meshing teeth! STU gives him a good hard YANK, and he\r\nslips out like a strand of fettuccine.\r\n\r\nThey hear RUMBLING on the tracks outside. A CAR is arriving!\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN GATES - OTHER SIDE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe REAPER loads LULU into the little roller-coaster and climbs aboard.\r\nThe car begins to move. STU and MONKEYBONE get there just in time to\r\njump onto the LUGGAGE RACK in the back!\r\n\r\nON ROLLER-COASTER - MOVING - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nThey peep over the back of the car at the REAPER and wonder what to do\r\nnext. MONKEYBONE spies a TOOL KIT mounted under the rack - opens it, and\r\npulls out a big, nasty MONKEYWRENCH.\r\n\r\nThe boys nod in agreement. MONKEYBONE clambers over the back of the car\r\nand hoists the wrench. STU covers his eyes. WHANG!\r\n\r\nSTU looks up - sees a confused MONKEYBONE alone in the car with LULU.\r\nNow he clambers into the car as well.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Where'd he go??\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I don't know.\r\n\r\nThere's no trace of the REAPER - except for a rumpled shroud, a\r\nwristwatch, and a St. Christopher's medal on the floor of the car. The\r\nboys exchange a puzzled shrug. MONKEYBONE tries on the watch.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. SLEEP LAB - PRE-DAWN\r\n\r\nThe wall clock says it's not quite 3 AM, yet JULIE has managed to round\r\nup all her co-workers: ALICE, HUTCH, CLARISSA, et al. They're groggy,\r\ndisheveled, un-made-up, unshaven. But they're there.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Six hours. That's when they pull the plug.\r\n That's how long we've got to wake him up.\r\n (beat)\r\n Now these are Stu's old charts from five years\r\n ago, when he first came to the sleep lab...\r\n\r\nShe points to a series of EASELS where HUTCH and ALICE have been tacking\r\nup EEG printouts, engram maps, etc.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n ...they show incredibly intense nightmare\r\n activity. The chart below is his new chart...\r\n\r\nThe lower chart shows a JAGGED SPIKE virtually identical to the one on\r\nthe upper chart. JULIE pauses for effect - then pulls on the edge of the\r\nlower chart, OPENING IT UP like a gatefold -\r\n\r\nThe onlookers GASP. Opened accordion-style, the lower chart shows the\r\nSAME SPIKE recurring again and again, TEN TIMES OVER!\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n Holy shit.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n He's stuck in a loop - a nightmare loop.\r\n (beat)\r\n Anybody here know what Oneirix is?\r\n\r\n CLARISSA\r\n Sure - it's an enzyme. The brain secretes it\r\n during violent dream activity...\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n It's nightmare juice. Julie and I were on the\r\n team that learned to synthesize it. If those\r\n charts are right, Stu's swimming in the stuff.\r\n (puzzled)\r\n Are you thinking we can decrease the levels?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n No. I want to give him more. I want to give him\r\n a massive dose.\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n That's not going to stop his nightmare -\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I don't want to stop the nightmare, Hutch. I\r\n want to crank it up. I want to take it right off\r\n the charts. I want to scare him awake.\r\n\r\nThe group exchanges nervous glances: it's risky. JULIE claps her hands:\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n All right! We have a plan. Let's move!\r\n\r\nAs the group swings into action, HUTCH pulls JULIE aside.\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n You know, Julie, even if this works - which it\r\n probably won't - that stuff is tricky. You don't\r\n know what it'll do to his brain.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What'll it do if they pull the plug?\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. LAND OF DEATH - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA PANORAMIC VIEW of an impossibly grand, Gilded-Age TRAIN STATION. A\r\ncentral turntable is the hub for dozens of TUNNELS, which converge like\r\nthe spokes of a wheel, disgorging long trains full of DEAD PASSENGERS\r\nfrom all over the world.\r\n\r\nFar above, in the dizzying reaches of the vaulted DOME that crowns the\r\nstation, REAPERS on FLYING BICYCLES spiral about like mosquitos,\r\nbringing dead souls to their final reward.\r\n\r\nThis is Thanatopolis - land of Death - truly the end of the line.\r\n\r\nA WET SQUEEGEE scrapes across the frame - wielded by a GRIM REAPER in a\r\njumpsuit bearing the logo of \"LAND OF DEATH WINDOW WASHERS, INC.\" The\r\nnoise is irritating, so a REAPER on the inside snaps the venetian blinds\r\nshut, cutting off our view.\r\n\r\nCAMERA PULLS BACK, and we realize we've been seeing all this through the\r\nwall-to-wall windows of...\r\n\r\nINT. DEATH'S OFFICE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nIt looks like the observation bridge in the nose of the Nautilus; the\r\ndecor is ornate, and the office equipment - vacuum tubes, pipe\r\nintercoms, etc. - is on loan from the Jules Verne Museum of Defunct\r\nTechnology.\r\n\r\nREAPERS are bustling about everywhere. One of them pushing a HAND TRUCK\r\nladen with oversized crates bearing the label \"DEAD SOULS.\"\r\n\r\n REAPER\r\n Batch of souls - just back from Processing.\r\n\r\n DEATH'S ASSISTANT\r\n Put them over there with the others.\r\n\r\nHe unloads the crates in a corner of the room, where SCORES of crated\r\nsouls are already piled up.\r\n\r\n DEATH'S ASSISTANT\r\n Your Grimness? We have a new shipment -\r\n\r\n DEATH (o.s.)\r\n Yeah, yeah, yeah... I'll get to it...\r\n\r\nWe can't see DEATH himself - just the back of a tall swivel chair. With\r\nmuch creaking, it rotates around - bringing us face-to-face with...\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - DEATH\r\n\r\nHe's not at all what you'd expect. He's a chubby-cheeked, bespectacled\r\nACCOUNTANT TYPE...a harried bureaucrat, just trying to do his job.\r\nThere's something sweet, almost avuncular about him.\r\n\r\nThere's an open crate of DEAD SOULS on his desk. Dead souls take the\r\nform of PERFORATED PAPER DOLLS...two-dimensional, underwear-clad,\r\nusually wearing expressions of shock. DEATH pulls a sheet from the box,\r\ndetaches the dead soul, and outfits it with a cut-out TOGA.\r\n\r\nNow he places it in a big diorama - with OODLES of toga-clad souls\r\nstaring up at a scale model of an active volcano. He throws a switch and\r\nBEAMS as the volcano spits BLOBS OF KETCHUP into the air.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Last Days of Pompeii...now there was a Great\r\n Moment in Death.\r\n\r\n DEATH'S ASSISTANT\r\n If I may point out...it is 12:05...\r\n\r\nDEATH, grumbling, digs into the box and pulls out another soul. His eyes\r\nlight up. He clutches the sheet with trembling hands.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n I can't believe - oh, man, I - SINATRA!! Do you\r\n know how long I've been waiting for this?\r\n\r\nSure enough, the doll on the sheet is Ol' Blue Eyes. DEATH digs in a\r\ndesk drawer and pulls out a SHOEBOX DIORAMA...DINO and SAMMY standing at\r\nmicrophones, with a third, center mike conspicuously open.\r\n\r\n DEATH'S ASSISTANT\r\n Make that 12:07, your bleakness...the dispatch\r\n team is waiting...\r\n\r\nGrumpy, DEATH shoves FRANK, DEAN, and SAMMY back in the drawer.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Okay, okay, send 'em in. Jeez.\r\n\r\nINT. DEATH'S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS - DAY\r\n\r\nA FLUNKY opens the office door, and a long line of REAPERS glides in.\r\nDEATH lugs an enormous musty leather-bound BOOK over to a long table. He\r\nsnaps his fingers and WHISTLES.\r\n\r\nHis pet HELLHOUND - a tiny plump weiner dog, with a HORNED DEATH'S HEAD\r\nfor a face, comes skittering across the office floor and jumps into his\r\nlap. Meanwhile, the ASSISTANT turns on a chugging, card-shuffling UNIVAC\r\nCOMPUTER, which spits out a length of TICKERTAPE.\r\n\r\n ASSISTANT\r\n Chakasandra Singh, New Delhi. Snakebite.\r\n\r\nDEATH checks the name against the master list in his big ledger. He\r\npulls out a document and puts his STAMP on it - the DEATH WARRANT. This\r\nhe gives to the REAPER at the head of the line.\r\n\r\n ASSISTANT\r\n Mulrooney, Lavinia P., Dearborn, Michigan. Head\r\n crushed in a pants press.\r\n\r\nAs the line moves along, we notice an odd-looking REAPER nearing the\r\ndesk. His gait is wobbly. His head bobs independently of the rest of his\r\nbody. There's a big, luminescent STAIN on the front of his shroud.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n YOU!!!\r\n\r\nEVERYONE FREEZES as DEATH points a bony finger DIRECTLY AT the wobbly\r\nREAPER with the iridescent stain.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n You're the customer, okay? You're about to die.\r\n It's a big occasion. A formal occasion. And as\r\n you shuffle off this mortal coil, the last thing\r\n your eyes behold is a Grim Reaper covered\r\n with...\r\n (sputtering)\r\n What the hell is that??\r\n\r\nTWO VOICES come out from under the shroud at once:\r\n\r\n STU MONKEYBONE\r\n Cranberry Margarita. Sex on the Beach.\r\n\r\nMuch COUGHING and THROAT-CLEARING from under the shroud. By now DEATH'S\r\nLAPDOG is GROWLING at the STAINED REAPER, and DEATH can't hear what\r\nanyone is saying. He shushes the dog.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n ...What??\r\n\r\n STU MONKEYBONE\r\n Salty Dog. Sufferin' Bastard.\r\n\r\nThe little hellhound YIPS VICIOUSLY. DEATH whacks him on the rump.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Well - whatever it is - you get that shroud to\r\n the dry cleaner ASAP! Now where were we?\r\n\r\n ASSISTANT\r\n Clarke P. Devereaux, San Francisco.\r\n Complications resulting from coma...\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Oh, wait. Says here he's supposed to recover.\r\n\r\nA loud chorus of \"A WWWWW's\" from the disappointed REAPERS. DEATH stamps\r\nthe word \"REPRIEVE\" on Clarke's warrant.\r\n\r\nHis ASSISTANT crosses the room. In the far wall is a steel-reinforced\r\nVAULT DOOR with a hydraulic wheel - the kind you see at banks. The\r\nASSISTANT dials in a combination, turns the wheel, laboriously pulls the\r\ndoor open and STEPS INSIDE...\r\n\r\n...returning, a moment later, with a priceless gold E-TICKET!!\r\n\r\nThe UPPER HALF of the STAINED REAPER begins to gyrate wildly.\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - ON STU - UNDER THE SHROUD\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE is doing an agitated TAP DANCE on his head. His TAIL whips\r\nrepeatedly across STU'S FACE.\r\n\r\nINT. DEATH'S OFFICE - BACK TO SCENE\r\n\r\nThe REAPER in front of the boys stares at the E-ticket, crestfallen.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Take this to Dark Town. Sad to say, he's gonna\r\n live another forty years.\r\n (a consoling pat on the shoulder)\r\n Sorry. Nobody said this job would be easy.\r\n\r\nThe ASSISTANT hands the REAPER a YELLOW MAILMAN'S POUCH containing the\r\nE-ticket. But before he can depart, the STAINED REAPER - aka STU and\r\nMONKEYBONE - jumps to the front of the line.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Say, Death, just out of curiosity, could we\r\n maybe swap jobs with that other guy? See, we've\r\n been meaning to drop in on Dark Town - I mean\r\n I've been meaning to...\r\n\r\nDEATH is stunned by this unprecedented breach of protocol. The other\r\nREAPERS in the line are ABUZZ.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n ...I beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n I got relatives there. I...EEP!!\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - ON STU - UNDER SHROUD\r\n\r\nAn ENRAGED STU is yanking on MONKEYBONE'S TAIL, signalling him to shut\r\nup. MONKEYBONE, in pain, squeals repeatedly. Finally he reaches down and\r\nPUNCHES STU IN THE NOSE.\r\n\r\nINT. DEATH'S OFFICE - BACK TO SCENE\r\n\r\nThe blow sends STU staggering. DEATH and the other REAPERS look on in\r\nastonishment as the STAINED REAPER does a bizarre DANCE across the\r\nfloor, top half and bottom half moving independently. Miraculously, he\r\nmanages to right himself and regain his balance.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Now what were you saying?\r\n\r\n STU/MONKEYBONE\r\n (in unison)\r\n Nothing.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n I'd like to have a word with you in private.\r\n\r\nHe stands and gestures toward a side room. The boys follow. The little\r\nHELLHOUND scampers out from behind the desk...\r\n\r\n...and GRABS THE HEM OF THEIR SHROUD in its teeth! The boys keep on\r\nwalking, but the shroud stays behind. Somehow they go three or four\r\nsteps before they realize they've been exposed.\r\n\r\nDEATH jumps a foot in the air and SHRIEKS. PANDEMONIUM ERUPTS.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n IMPOSTORS!! GET 'EM!!\r\n\r\nThe boys back toward the big WINDOW overlooking the trainyard. The\r\nREAPERS close in on them, BRANDISHING THEIR SCYTHES.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n HYPNOS! That little twerp! He's the one who put\r\n you up to this!\r\n\r\nWith a SCREECH, MONKEYBONE LEAPS into the air, BOUNDS OVER the heads and\r\nshoulders of the advancing REAPERS, and SNATCHES the yellow E-ticket\r\npouch from the guy Death gave it to.\r\n\r\nHe bounds over a table and into STU's arms, with the precious pouch in\r\nhand! DEATH lets out a great rattling BELLOW OF RAGE.\r\n\r\nHis features begin to JITTER VIOLENTLY. HIS HEAD EXPLODES!!!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Yowie.\r\n\r\nNothing to lose at this point. With a CRASH, the boys DIVE THROUGH THE\r\nBIG WINDOW overlooking the trainyard!\r\n\r\nThe headless DEATH gropes around blindly, waving to his ASSISTANT.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Head. HEAD!!\r\n\r\nThe ASSISTANT opens a cabinet containing a half-dozen identical HEADS.\r\nHe pulls out a spare and screws it onto DEATH's neck.\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe boys land hard at the edge of the trainyard. Behind them, REAPERS\r\nare shepherding a line of newly arrived DEAD PEOPLE past a sign which\r\nreads: \"PROCESSING - THIS WAY.\"\r\n\r\nBy the time they can dust themselves off, an ALARM starts blaring.\r\nREAPERS drop what they're doing, point at the boys. Panic time!\r\n\r\nNearby, a FLYING BICYCLE is propped up against a SIGN. Side-by-side they\r\nrace toward the bike, each of them clutching the strap of the pouch,\r\nYANKING each other back and forth in a tug-of-war.\r\n\r\nSTU's bigger. He pulls the pouch onto his shoulder, and MONKEYBONE with\r\nit. They grab the bike, climb aboard, and pedal off -\r\n\r\n- revealing the SIGN it was leaning against: \"CYCLE REPAIR.\"\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - ON BICYCLE - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nSTU pedals onto the central turntable area. The BATWINGS on the rear of\r\nthe bike flap feebly, but the flying bike just won't fly.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE looks over his shoulder. A small ARMY of REAPERS, anned with\r\nscythes, is pouring into the trainyard behind them.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu...Stu...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n IT'S NOT WORKING.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n There's a thing here! There's a switch!\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE fiddles with the ignition switch. A BLACK CLOUD OF EXHAUST\r\nbelches violently from the rear of the bike, almost pitching them off\r\ntheir seat. The batwings start to flap faster...\r\n\r\nSPUT. BLAP. The engine BACKFIRES and DIES. STU fiddles with the switch,\r\nbut it's no go.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Stu...LOOK!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n What?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Isn't that Lulu?\r\n\r\nLULU is still sitting in her little car at the edge of the tracks, eyes\r\ncrossed, mouth agape. MONKEYBONE waves brightly. Then a mob of REAPERS\r\nappears on either side of LULU's car, swarming out onto the tracks! STU\r\nstarts pedaling for his life.\r\n\r\nHe makes for the TRAIN TUNNELS in the far wall of the station.\r\nILLUMINATED SIGNS over the tunnels read: Calcutta...Hong Kong...Waco, TX\r\n...and directly ahead...\r\n\r\nDark Town!! By now they're well out onto the turnaround. STU pedals\r\nfrantically, BOUNCING over tracks and ties. MONKEYBONE bites his\r\nfingernails down to the quick as he watches the column of REAPERS\r\npursuing them onto the tracks.\r\n\r\nINT. OFFICE - ON DEATH\r\n\r\nwatching through a crooked spyglass as the boys pedal down the tracks.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Now we've got 'em.\r\n\r\nPetting his hellhound, he reaches for a WALL SWITCH.\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - HIGH ANGLE\r\n\r\nThe boys are almost at the Dark Town tunnel. The REAPERS, on foot, will\r\nnever be able to catch them. But as they pick up speed for the stretch\r\nrun, the GROUND begins to move beneath them!\r\n\r\nDEATH has activated the TRAIN TURNAROUND - the rotating platform at the\r\nend of the line which allows an engine to reverse direction. Before they\r\nknow it, they're doing a full 180!\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - ON BICYCLE\r\n\r\nThe boys continue to bounce down the tracks - but the tunnel entrances\r\nseem to be SPINNING before their eyes. Before they know it, they're\r\npedaling directly TOWARD the mob of ANGRY REAPERS!!\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Weren't we just here?\r\n\r\nSTU jerks the handlebars HARD RIGHT and JUMPS THE TRACK he's on. He\r\nWINCES IN PAIN as the bike BOUNCES over a series of rails...\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n What'd I tell you? You go to the Land of Death,\r\n wear a jockstrap!\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - HIGH ANGLE\r\n\r\nThe REAPERS are SPREADING OUT around the turntable - encircling it! STU\r\nrides around the periphery of the great turning platter, but there's no\r\ngetting off. They're completely surrounded!\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - ON BICYCLE\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE covers both eyes and wails in fear. But STU is rattling the\r\nignition switch, making ONE LAST EFFORT to get the bike aloft...\r\n\r\nTHE ENGINE CATCHES. Trailing black fumes, the BICYCLE RISES! The REAPERS\r\nconverge in its path, and RAISE THEIR SCYTHES...\r\n\r\nBut the bike JUST MANAGES TO CLEAR the tangle of scythes - leaving the\r\nREAPERS slicing at empty air!\r\n\r\nINT. OFFICE - ON DEATH\r\n\r\nThrough the big window, he sees the boys leveling off, flying toward the\r\nDARK TOWN TUNNEL. They're moments away from a clean escape.\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S ROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU's readout monitors are registering frantic nightmare activity when\r\nJULIE and ALICE enter. JULIE sets her purse on STU's bedside table -\r\nremoves a SYRINGE and a test tube filled with PURPLISH FLUID.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What's the maximum safe dose?\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Most we've ever used is half a CC.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Five CC's.\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - DEATH\r\n\r\nHe unlocks a RED SECURITY BOX on his wall. Inside is a TOGGLE SWITCH\r\nlabelled \"FATE WORSE THAN DEATH.\" He flips it...\r\n\r\nCLOSEUP - THE SYRINGE\r\n\r\nThe plunger goes down, injecting fluid into STU...\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - ON FLYING BIKE\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE is sitting on STU's shoulder, facing backward, thumbing his\r\nnose at the REAPERS. STU glances back as well, laughing, unable to\r\nbelieve his own good luck.\r\n\r\nSince they're both looking the wrong way, neither of them sees the\r\nsheer, monolithic WALL rising up DIRECTLY IN THEIR PATH.\r\n\r\nIt's no ordinary wall. It's STU'S PAINTING - the one ALICE found in the\r\ncloset, the wolf-surgeon canvas from his scary period -\r\n\r\n- and as the bicycle SLAMS INTO IT, it begins to TOPPLE OVER - PINNING\r\nSTU against the ground underneath!\r\n\r\nSTU'S DREAMSCAPE\r\n\r\nNo bike. No monkey. Just STU - who finds himself on an operating table,\r\nwith the world of the painting coming to 3-D life around him. The WOLF-\r\nFACED SURGEONS are closing in on him, baring their fangs, brandishing\r\ntheir scalpels and their metallic REPLACEMENT PARTS...\r\n\r\nSuddenly the fabric of this weird reality TEARS - just like a rip in a\r\ncanvas. A FURRY PAW reaches through - GRABS STU by the hand...\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n This ain't my nightmare!\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAINYARD - JUST OUTSIDE TUNNEL\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE PULLS STU through the rip in the back of the giant toppled\r\ncanvas. The bike's there waiting. They hop aboard and pedal off INTO THE\r\nDARK TOWN TUNNEL a split-second before the REAPERS arrive to slice them\r\nto ribbons.\r\n\r\nINT. DARK TOWN TUNNEL - ON BICYCLE\r\n\r\nSTU pedals so hard his heart is about to burst. He feels down at his\r\nside - the yellow pouch containing the E-ticket is still there. The\r\nREAPERS are clustered at the mouth of the tunnel, but they aren't\r\nfollowing.\r\n\r\nThe boys WEEP WITH GLEE. It's a miracle - they've cheated Death!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN GATES - NIGHT\r\n\r\nAn exhausted STU huffs and puffs as he pedals the bike up the last\r\nstretch of track to the platform outside the gates. He climbs off the\r\nbike and stares back - it looks like the last thousand miles or so have\r\nall been uphill. He slings the YELLOW POUCH over his shoulder...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You saved my life, Monkeybone. I never would've\r\n made it without you.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Move it. We got exactly five minutes left.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n It's just...now that I'm leaving, I feel like\r\n there's lots of things I haven't said. Who's\r\n gonna look out for you? Are you gonna be okay\r\n when I'm gone?\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Oh, don't you worry. I'll be fine.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You've been a hell of a figment, pal. I sure\r\n wish I could take you home with me.\r\n\r\nThe gates slide open. STU passes through. But MONKEYBONE lingers behind\r\na moment - just long enough for one of the SINGING SPHINXES to slip him\r\na big, nasty BASEBALL BAT.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Awwww. Worried about my feelings, are you? Well,\r\n there's a new twist.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Don't joke around, little buddy. I mean it. I\r\n really do love y--\r\n\r\nHe turns - and MONKEYBONE MARK McGWIRES HIM upside the head! STU\r\ncrumples in a heap...\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Love you too. Boss.\r\n\r\nLaughing maniacally, MONKEYBONE STEALS the E-TICKET and goes RACING OFF\r\nDOWN THE MIDWAY!!\r\n\r\nSTU'S HEAD is swimming. It takes him a few seconds, but he gets to his\r\nfeet. By now, MONKEYBONE is halfway to the E-ticket ride. Worse yet,\r\nSTU'S WATCH reads 8:59 AM!!!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Stop! Monkeybone! Please!!\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN PLAZA - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe STREETS ARE LINED with Darktowners ROOTING MONKEYBONE ON as if he's\r\nthe hometown favorite in a big footrace. Which he is.\r\n\r\nMONKEYBONE reaches the E-TICKET RIDE - drops his E-TICKET into the\r\nreceptacle at the gate. The drawbridge lowers...\r\n\r\nAs STU sprints down the street, the SNAIL MAN oozes into his path - and\r\nTRIPS HIM! Before he can get up, cackling DARKTOWNERS converge on him -\r\nforcing him back to the ground and HOLDING HIM THERE.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n NO! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?? HE'S GOT MY E-TICKET!\r\n HE'S GOT MY -\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Sorry, Stu. It's all part of the deal. We've got\r\n big plans for that body of yours!\r\n\r\nEXT. E-TICKET RIDE - ON MONKEYBONE\r\n\r\nThe familiar miasma of COLORS is beginning to swirl in the night sky\r\noverhead. MONKEYBONE straps on a NEEDLE-TIPPED HELMET which makes him\r\nlook like a simian DART. Then he climbs into the seat of the TEST-YOUR-\r\nSTRENGTH machine and braces himself for the big ride!\r\n\r\nEXT. DARK TOWN PLAZA - THAT MOMENT - RIGHT\r\n\r\nONLOOKERS APPLAUD as the robot lifts its mallet and LETS FLY. DING!! The\r\ntiny figure of MONKEYBONE soars toward the swirling colors. His DART-\r\nHELMET strikes the black hole dead center.\r\n\r\nSTU WATCHES HELPLESSLY as MONKEYBONE penetrates the veil of the sky and\r\nVANISHES. He's still SCREAMING when the cackling DARKTOWNERS drag him\r\nout of the plaza by the heels...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n NO! JULIE! NO-O-O-O!\r\n\r\nAERIAL SHOT - ON MONKEYBONE\r\n\r\nROCKETING UPWARD through the clouds in his dart-helmet, a look of SHEER\r\nEXHILARATION on his simian face. Somewhere a CLOCK begins to chime the\r\nhour...\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S PRIVATE ROOM - 8:59 AM - DAY\r\n\r\nMOST OF OUR CAST is either in STU's room or in the hallway outside.\r\n\r\nPLUS we've got a man of the cloth; two LEGAL TYPES, with briefcases; and\r\nseveral of the NURSES from the facility.\r\n\r\nALICE squeezes JULIE's hand, and JULIE squeezes STU's. The minute hand\r\non the clock hits twelve. KIMMY, sobbing into a handkerchief, gives DR.\r\nEDELSTEIN the nod. As he reaches for the power switch...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n EEEEEEPP!!\r\n\r\nJULIE DROPS the hand with a gasp. The DOCTOR jumps half a foot.\r\n\r\nAll at once STU is sitting BOLT UPRIGHT IN BED...shaking his head and\r\nfeeling around gingerly under the bedclothes, as if something VERY SHARP\r\nhas just poked him in the ass.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Oooie! That smarts!!!\r\n\r\nKIMMY sighs and FAINTS DEAD AWAY.\r\n\r\nSTU blinks and looks about the room, disoriented. It could be because\r\nhe's just come out of a coma after seven months. Or it could be because\r\nhe's a MONKEY unaccustomed to hanging out in a human body.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Julie?... Hey, you are a looker.\r\n\r\nA BURST OF LAUGHTER from the others in the room. Weeping TEARS OF JOY,\r\nJULIE flings herself across the bed and hugs him tight.\r\n\r\nWhile JULIE is hugging him, STU is checking out his new fingers and\r\ntoes, RUBBING his sparse patch of CHEST FUR. DOCTORS and NURSES look on\r\nin amazement from the doorway.\r\n\r\n NURSE\r\n It's a miracle. It's a miracle.\r\n\r\n DOCTOR\r\n Two more ticks of the clock...\r\n\r\nSTU is almost oblivious to JULIE. He lifts up the sheet, sneaks a quick\r\npeek at his CROTCH, and grins delightedly.\r\n\r\nJULIE gives him another kiss, WHISPERS in his ear:\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Thank you. Thank you for coming back to me.\r\n\r\nWhat she doesn't know is that, although he still looks like STU, his\r\nbody is now occupied by MONKEYBONE. Since he's now a hybrid character,\r\nman on the outside and monkey within, let's call him...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Boy, I don't know about you guys, but I'm\r\n starving.\r\n\r\n WIPE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. DUNGEON - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA damp, stonewalled VAULT with a barred door. STU is sprawled on the\r\nfloor, OUT COLD, when a VOICE awakes him...\r\n\r\n RAT GUARD (o.s.)\r\n Heads up! Feeding time!\r\n\r\nSTU comes around just in time to see a PANEL sliding open in the ceiling\r\nfar overhead. A torrent of JUNK - stale popcorn, half-eaten candy bars,\r\nmolten ice cream pops, and sticky soda - rains down ON HIS FACE.\r\n\r\nA horde of DARK FIGURES emerge from the shadowy catacombs around him.\r\nAll at once, HANDS are grabbing at him from all directions. STU lets out\r\na SCREAM - backs up against a wall -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Who are y-- WHAT DO YOU WANT??\r\n\r\nA MONGOL WARRIOR with a droopy mustache looks up at him.\r\n\r\n GENGHIS KHAN\r\n Dinner.\r\n\r\nAfter a moment STU realizes that the DARK FIGURES have almost no\r\ninterest in him - instead, they've been grabbing at the half-eaten\r\nSNACKS that cascaded down onto his head. A long-haired SLAV - RASPUTIN -\r\ndives on a Hershey bar with only one bite out of it, but an oddly\r\nfamiliar FAT MAN gets there first. STU gapes at him...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Alfred Hitchcock??\r\n\r\n EDGAR ALLAN POE\r\n A fat bastard, but damn quick on his feet.\r\n\r\n TYPHOID MARY\r\n That's how he keeps his girlish figure.\r\n\r\n STEPHEN KING\r\n Gotta move fast in this crowd, or you'll starve.\r\n Here you go, pal. Have some popcorn.\r\n\r\nHe offers STU a box of popcorn soaked in Dr. Pepper.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n What is this stuff?\r\n\r\n STEPHEN KING\r\n They feed us the slops from the Morpheum\r\n Theatre. You hope for Jujubes, settle for\r\n goobers. - I'm Steve. Steve King.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Stephen King? What are you doing in here?\r\n\r\nVarious OTHERS emerge from the shadows to shake STU's hand.\r\n\r\n JACK THE RIPPER\r\n I'm Jack the Ripper.\r\n\r\n TYPHOID MARY\r\n Typhoid Mary.\r\n\r\n ATILLA THE HUN\r\n Atilla the Hun. Trade you a Twizzler for a box\r\n of Raisinets!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Atilla the - ! What in hell is this place?\r\n\r\nAs if in reply, a FANFARE sounds in the distance...\r\n\r\nINT. DUNGEON - ENTRANCE\r\n\r\nA RAT GUARD stands at attention by the door, TOOTING HIS KAZOO to\r\nannounce the arrival of an honored guest.\r\n\r\n RAT GUARD\r\n All hail the most glorious! Most eminent! Most\r\n esteemed all-powerful God of Sleep...his Royal\r\n Lassitude -\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Enough, enough, I'm hung over.\r\n\r\nAs HYPNOS passes, the DUNGEON DWELLERS race up to the WALL OF BARS that\r\nseparates the entry area from the dungeon proper.\r\n\r\n TYPHOID MARY\r\n Hyp! Did you bring me the cough medicine?\r\n\r\n STEPHEN KING\r\n Did you remember the night light I asked for?\r\n\r\n EDGAR ALLAN POE\r\n King, you pussy.\r\n\r\n STEPHEN KING\r\n Bite me, Poe! I hate waking up in the dark.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Sorry, Steve, maybe next time. And how's our new\r\n guest settling in - ?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n YOU SET ME UP!!\r\n\r\nSTU LUNGES at HYPNOS - who backs up just out of reach.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Easy, pal! I was coming to congratulate you. It\r\n ain't easy snatching one of those E-tickets.\r\n Steve here was the last guy to pull it off, and\r\n that musta been, what, 25 years ago...?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Why'd you do it? What'd I ever do to you?!?\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n It's simple, Stu. We need nightmares - lots of\r\n 'em. So whenever we can swing it, we send a guy\r\n up to stimulate the flow...a nightmare maker!\r\n Like Steve here. Poe. Rasputin...we've been\r\n doing this all the way back to Atilla and\r\n Genghis Khan!\r\n\r\n STU\r\n But why me? Why'd you pick on me??\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n The monkey, of course. It was his idea.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Monkeybone...!?\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Nobody wants to be a sidekick, Stu. So one day\r\n he comes to us - he's got a proposition. We help\r\n him get your body...in return he gives us all\r\n the nightmares we want.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You're nuts! I'm a comic strip artist! What's he\r\n gonna do - draw really scary cartoons??\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Oh, no, no, no. Y'see, Stu, as it happens, that\r\n girlfriend of yours figured out the chemical\r\n basis of bad dreams. And she just whipped up a\r\n big old batch of nightmare juice!\r\n\r\nSTU's face goes white as he realizes the point of the master plan.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Oh, we're predicting a record box-office. It's\r\n like I always say...nightmares are your best\r\n entertainment!\r\n\r\nHYPNOS marches off, chuckling. STU's head sinks into his hands.\r\n\r\nEXT. STU AND JULIE'S HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nSTU's back from the hospital. JULIE is removing his bags from the trunk\r\nof KIMMY's car while STU and KIMMY chat in the front seat.\r\n\r\n KIMMY\r\n I just couldn't stand the thought of you\r\n suffering. I love you so, I would never have...\r\n forgive me, Stu. Please forgive me.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Kimmy. Chill. We've still got a pact. If\r\n anything ever happens to you, I'll be right\r\n there to return the favor.\r\n (baring his teeth)\r\n So drive carefully! From now on.\r\n\r\nHe climbs out. KIMMY is so rattled that she smacks bumpers with the car\r\nparked in front of her. She PEELS OUT with the hand brake still on.\r\n\r\nINT. STU & JULIE'S HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE and JULIE enter with luggage. He stands there for a moment\r\nscoping out the unfamiliar surroundings. She sets the bags down, taps\r\nhim on the shoulder.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Welcome home.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE grins insipidly. She kisses him, pulls him into a tight embrace\r\n- and then, overwhelmed by emotion, begins to SOB.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Oh, baby, I can't believe you're back.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Home sweet home, huh? Actually, I was expecting\r\n something a little swankier. How much loot does\r\n old Stu rake in, anyway?\r\n\r\nShe gives him an extremely puzzled look.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Meaning me, of course. I'm referring to myself.\r\n You have to assume Monkeybone would be a pretty\r\n lucrative franchise...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Baby? Why don't you just...rest on the sofa for\r\n a minute. I'll be right back.\r\n\r\nShe goes into the kitchen as STU-BONE plops onto the sofa. He spies a\r\nbowl of FRESH FRUIT on the coffee table and immediately tries to pick up\r\na banana with his FOOT.\r\n\r\nBut he can't. He's got shoes on. Frowning, he unties his shoe, peels off\r\nhis sock. His bare foot is in the fruit bowl when JULIE returns from the\r\nkitchen with a TRAY holding a chocolate cake and the bottle of CHAMPAGNE\r\nStu bought three months ago. The cake bears the message \"WELCOME HOME -\r\nI LOVE YOU\" in pink icing.\r\n\r\nShe sits beside him with the goodies. He removes his foot from the bowl,\r\ncrosses his legs, WIGGLES HIS TOES at her. She smiles uncertainly. Then\r\nshe opens the bottle of champagne and pours two flutes full.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Here's to a bottle...we should have opened...\r\n three months ago.\r\n\r\nShe finishes pouring, hands a flute to STU-BONE. His face is smeared\r\nwith CAKE and ICING. He's scooped out a big fistful and crammed it right\r\ninto his pie hole. He GRINS at her.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Bitchin' good cake.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu, are you...feeling okay?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Sure. Why?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n You're acting kind of...odd.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n (grabbing another fistful)\r\n In what way?\r\n\r\nThen: we hear TINY NAILS skittering across the hardwood floors at high\r\nspeed. And BUSTER THE DOG races into the living room!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Buster! Look who's here!\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE tenses instinctively. The dog is yipping, wagging his tail\r\ninsanely at the sight of his long-lost master - until he gets just a\r\nlittle bit closer, and senses that something is very, very wrong.\r\n\r\nBUSTER sizes STU-BONE up and GROWLS. STU-BONE bares his teeth and\r\nHISSES. The dog LUNGES - and STU-BONE jumps up on the sofa!\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Oh shit, the cake!\r\n\r\nHe bends down, snatches up the cake, and CRADLES IT under one arm as he\r\nKICKS AT BUSTER from the sofa.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Mine. Get back! MINE!!\r\n\r\nThe frazzled JULIE pours herself another jolt of champagne - a stiff\r\none.\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSOUNDS of JULIE taking a shower in the adjacent bathroom o.s.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE is sprawled in bed, pillows propped up behind him, flipping\r\nchannels on the bedroom TV with his trusty remote. The Discovery Channel\r\nhappens to be showing a Jane Goodall special...\r\n\r\n NARRATOR (on TV)\r\n The mating rituals of the African silverback are\r\n as rigidly formalized as those of any animal we\r\n know - with the possible exception of man.\r\n\r\nOnscreen a FEMALE GORILLA is presenting her furry haunches to an ALPHA\r\nMALE.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE watches this erotic spectacle with a connoisseur's eye. He\r\nglances over at the open bathroom door and catches a teasing glimpse of\r\nJULIE'S SHADOW as she steps out of the shower and pulls on a robe. He\r\nSCRATCHES and SNIFFS, just to put himself in the mood.\r\n\r\nOn TV: MONKEY FOREPLAY, which consists of a pounce from behind.\r\n\r\n NARRATOR (on TV)\r\n In the wild, a dominant chimpanzee male is\r\n likely to engage in sex numerous times\r\n throughout the day, with a shockingly wide\r\n variety of -\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE mutes the nature special and sneaks up behind JULIE just as she\r\nemerges from the bathroom in her robe and towel-turban.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What are you watching?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Ohhh, nothing.\r\n\r\nShe tries to pass, but he grabs the belt of her robe and spins her\r\naround. He delicately unwraps the turban, then opens her robe and pulls\r\nit closed around the two of them. They kiss...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n You sure this is...medically advisable?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Got a doctor on duty.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Well. As long as it's okay with Monkeybone -\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE almost lets out a gasp of shock. What does she mean???\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n (glancing downward)\r\n - which it seems to be.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE does a take. The good news is, she doesn't suspect. The bad\r\nnews is, he's apparently named after his creator's penis.\r\n\r\nINT. HALLWAY - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nAll at once the air is full of Barry White's lush baritone on the\r\nbedroom CD player. Through the bedroom doorway we see STU-BONE and JULIE\r\nwaltzing romantically, belly to belly, still wrapped up in the single\r\nrobe.\r\n\r\nThe only jarring note is BUSTER'S FRANTIC BARKING. The poor dog is stuck\r\nbehind an accordion gate in the hall, going crazy, trying to warn his\r\nmistress about the imposter in STU's body. The dog is almost drowning\r\nout Barry White -\r\n\r\n- so STU-BONE stops kissing JULIE long enough to reach over with one\r\nfoot and KICK THE DOOR SHUT.\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nJULIE watches from the bed as STU-BONE begins peeling off his PJ's,\r\ngoing into a bizarrely formalized MONKEY MATING DANCE. He circles back\r\nand forth from one side of the bed to the other, making faces, grunting,\r\nFEINTING at her occasionally.\r\n\r\nJULIE has some dim sense that this ritual is supposed to be erotic, but\r\nin fact, it's making her damned nervous. She finds herself scrunching up\r\non the bed, trying to keep out of STU-BONE's way.\r\n\r\nNow he LEAPS UP onto the foot of the bed. REARS BACK. And with an animal\r\nhowl of triumph, POUNCES AT JULIE!\r\n\r\nTerrified, she rolls out of the way. STU-BONE'S SKULL slams into the\r\nheadboard.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Oh, God!! Baby! Are you -\r\n\r\nDazed, he sits up. He tries to stand, but his rubbery legs give way, and\r\nhe pitches over - CRACKING HIS SKULL AGAIN on the nightstand.\r\n\r\nEXT. HALLWAY - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nJULIE helps a punchdrunk, staggering STU to the stairway.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n How was it? I don't recall.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n It was great, baby. Let's get you to the ER.\r\n\r\nAs they pass, BUSTER lets out a little growl of satisfaction from behind\r\nhis gate. HOLD ON THE DOG's satisfied expression as STU-BONE loses his\r\nbalance and topples down the stairs O.S.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. DUNGEON - NIGHT\r\n\r\nRASPUTIN, ATILLA, JACK THE RIPPER and STEPHEN KING are engrossed in\r\ntheir weekly Parcheesi game. STU is clinging to the bars, bemoaning his\r\nfate.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'm not like the rest of you. I'm just a regular\r\n guy! I'm not a \"nightmare maker.\"\r\n\r\n RASPUTIN\r\n Neither are we. We got our bodies hijacked just\r\n like you. The guys who replaced us are the\r\n nightmare makers!\r\n\r\n ATTILA\r\n Like me. I was a mess sergeant in the Mongol\r\n Horde. I never wanted to be the Scourge of Asia.\r\n I just wanted a new recipe for yak!\r\n\r\n JACK THE RIPPER\r\n I was Jack the Haberdasher.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n But how? Did you all have sidekicks? Figments?\r\n ...Monkeys??\r\n\r\n STEPHEN KING\r\n Hey, I got screwed over by my own dog. Go\r\n through hell to get that E-ticket, and who winds\r\n up in my body? That darn Cujo.\r\n\r\nTYPHOID MARY runs past, GIGGLING, pursued by a huffing HITCHCOCK.\r\n\r\n RASPUTIN\r\n He's sure got a thing for those icy blondes.\r\n\r\nKAZOOS SOUND. The RAT GUARD appears to announce:\r\n\r\n RAT GUARD\r\n Miley. You got a visitor.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n ...Kitty?!?\r\n\r\nAt the sight of STU behind bars, she breaks down CRYING.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n I'm so sorry, Stu. I wanted to tell you what was\r\n going on. I really, really liked you.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Kitty...my situation is really not important.\r\n The thing is, my girlfriend is now living with,\r\n and possibly engaged to, a demented monkey.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n You're such a beautiful man. Look at you - stuck\r\n in this place, and only thinking of her.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Listen to me! Is there any way I can warn her\r\n what Monkeybone is up to??\r\n\r\n RAT GUARD\r\n Time's up! Break it up, you two.\r\n\r\nThe RAT GUARD pushes STU back with a prod. KITTY reaches out...\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n No! Give me a moment. Just to look at him. Oh,\r\n Stu. Oh, my sweet, sweet Stu.\r\n\r\nAs she gazes at him, love struck, the overhead PANEL opens and a deluge\r\nof CRUD from the Morpheum lands directly on STU.\r\n\r\n RAT GUARD\r\n Feeding time!\r\n\r\nKITTY BAWLS inconsolably as the RAT GUARD leads her away.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. KITCHEN - DAY\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE in pajamas and a head bandage, reading the morning funnies. He\r\npounds the table, practically WEEPING with hilarity at the MONKEYBONE\r\nCOMIC STRIP.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Priceless! Priceless! This stuff just kills me!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I'm heading in to work, baby. Are you sure\r\n you'll be okay?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Oh yeah. There's just one thing I don't get.\r\n \"Monkeybone Creator Awakens from Coma\" that's a\r\n big story! That's front page news! But I can't\r\n find a word of coverage in this stinkin' rag!\r\n (shuffling through the paper)\r\n Hey. Don't I have a TV show?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n They only made the one episode. They've shown it\r\n about nineteen times.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n I need a new PR guy.\r\n\r\nJULIE grins, plants a goodbye smooch on his forehead, and exits. He\r\nwaits a minute, then reaches for the PHONE.\r\n\r\n WIPE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. LIVING ROOM - EVENING\r\n\r\nThe house is crawling with PRESS. There must be three dozen REPORTERS\r\nand PHOTOGRAPHERS and TV CREWS hanging on STUBONE's every pronouncement.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Yes, being in a coma taught Stu Miley a thing or\r\n two about life. Buckle your seat belts, for one.\r\n But seriously, Stu Miley is a different man\r\n today. I'm much homier.\r\n\r\nThe front door opens. A stunned JULIE pushes her way inside...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n And speaking of which, here's the light of my\r\n life, the pert and saucy Miss Julie McElroy.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I had to park two blocks away. Is something -\r\n\r\nHe pulls her to his side for a photo op. FLASHBULBS go off.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I took the liberty of calling a little press\r\n conference. We're on TV, so don't say \"shit.\"\r\n (covering his mouth)\r\n Shit! I said it. Shit! I said it again!\r\n\r\n REPORTER\r\n Stu, what is it about Monkeybone that makes him\r\n so popular?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Well, it's partly that he punctures all the\r\n phony pretensions of our modern society...and\r\n it's partly that he's a breathtakin',\r\n heartbreakin', rump-shakin' sex machine!\r\n (beat)\r\n Ask these gentlemen here. They're an important\r\n cog in my media machine. They'll be doing six\r\n new episodes of the Monkeybone show under my\r\n personal supervision.\r\n\r\nHe pauses for a photo op with MIKE CACHUELA and MIKE MITCHELL.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n It's all synergy. The show synergizes the strip,\r\n which synergizes the merchandising, which\r\n synergizes the religion, which synergizes the\r\n Barbara Walters special; and then, baby, we are\r\n all in the United Empire of Monkeybonia.\r\n\r\nINT. KITCHEN - THAT MOMENT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nJULIE squeezes through the crowd, finds HERB working the phone.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n I tell you, he's ready to merchandise. We've\r\n gotta move quickly. Get the toy guys, the burger\r\n guys, the lunchbox guys -\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Herb...what in God's name -\r\n\r\nHERB holds up a finger. He's too busy talking. STU-BONE enters with the\r\nvideo crew in tow. JULIE somehow manages to sideline him.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What's this about merchandising? You always\r\n hated merchandising!\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Well, baby, I do, but to look at it from another\r\n angle...there's a potload of money here.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\nEXT. STREET - DAY\r\n\r\nSUPERCHARGED POP MUSIC underneath as STU-BONE comes running around a\r\ncorner - followed, a moment later, by a SCREAMING HORDE of BEAUTIFUL\r\nGROUPIES in black miniskirts and high heels. It's like something out of\r\nA Hard Day's Night, only more so.\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nTIGHT on STU-BONE, head still bandaged, eyes closed, SNORING slightly.\r\nHe wears a big monkey grin as he DREAMS the above.\r\n\r\nEXT. STREET - DAY\r\n\r\nA CARLOAD OF SUPERMODELS. They kill their engine in the middle of a busy\r\nintersection and climb out to join the mob chasing STU-BONE.\r\n\r\nHe cuts around a corner, ducks into an alley, and FLATTENS HIMSELF\r\nbehind a dumpster. As the girls run past, he pulls out a handkerchief\r\nand MOPS SWEAT from his brow.\r\n\r\nThen, with a what-the-hell twinkle, he steps out and FLINGS HIS SWEATY\r\nHANKIE into the midst of the GROUPIES. A CATFIGHT ensues as they\r\nscramble after this precious memento. The chase resumes.\r\n\r\nSuddenly he realizes he's SLOWING DOWN...running in SLO-MO. Same deal\r\nwith the girls on his trail. After a moment, he FREEZES. He can't move\r\nanything except his EYES; he looks right, left, up, down...\r\n\r\n...and suddenly he sees HYPNOS winking into view directly in front of\r\nhim! HYPNOS is perfectly capable of moving. He strolls right up to the\r\nfrozen STU-BONE and SLAPS HIM REPEATEDLY, Moe Howard-style.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n You two-bit simian stooge. WHAT THE HELL IS\r\n THIS? We didn't send you up here to shake your\r\n booty and chase broads. We sent you up to make\r\n nightmares!!\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE tries to speak. All that comes out is a slo-mo DRAWL.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Now find that nightmare juice and get to work.\r\n 'Cause you may be a free man during the day...\r\n but when you dream, your monkey ass is mine!\r\n\r\nHe winds up - throws a ROUNDHOUSE PUNCH at STU-BONE'S FACE.\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE sits up suddenly in bed. For a moment he's relieved - it was\r\nall a dream. Then he realizes his FACE is swelling like a\r\nprizefighter's. His front tooth is loose. BLOOD is streaming from his\r\nnose!\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Eep!\r\n\r\nINT. DOWNSTAIRS HALLWAY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nHe's awake, fully dressed, and fishing around in the pocket of JULIE's\r\ntopcoat. He finds her KEY RING and tiptoes furtively to the front door.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Friggin' Hypnos. I'll show him...\r\n\r\nINT. SLEEP LAB - NIGHT\r\n\r\nHe unlocks the door and enters the darkened lab. Finds the dispensary\r\narea and kneels beside a LOCKED REFRIGERATOR. Then he shuffles through\r\nthe keys on the ring until he finds one labelled \"FRIDGE.\"\r\n\r\nOn the top shelf is a corked beaker of purple fluid bearing the label\r\n\"ONEIRIX\" with red DANGER stickers all over it. STU-BONE takes it out,\r\nflashes a sinister grin, and EMPTIES ITS CONTENTS into a similar beaker.\r\nThen he refills the original from a hip flask and replaces it.\r\n\r\nHe's just about to leave when he's startled by a series of SIMIAN GRUNTS\r\nand SQUEAKS - which are TRANSLATED in SUBTITLE:\r\n\r\n FEMALE BABOON\r\n Hey, handsome.\r\n\r\nHe turns and spots a SEDUCTIVE FEMALE BABOON who's confmed to a CAGE in\r\nthe corner. The conversation continues in MONKEY TALK.\r\n\r\n FEMALE BABOON\r\n Yeah, you. Come here, good-looking.\r\n (beat)\r\n Why don't you let me out of this cage?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Hey, I'd love to, baby, but...it'd put me in hot\r\n water.\r\n\r\n FEMALE BABOON\r\n (caressing his chin)\r\n I know how to be very, very grateful.\r\n\r\nHe pulls out a MATCHBOOK and scribbles a number on it.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Tell you what, angel. When you get out, give me\r\n a call...\r\n\r\nA LIGHT goes on suddenly in the outside hallway! STU-BONE tries to dive\r\nfor cover, but the FEMALE BABOON grabs him by the belt and pulls him\r\nagainst the cage.\r\n\r\nStartled, he drops the ONEIRIX BEAKER - which rolls out into the hall!\r\n\r\nINT. HALLWAY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe beaker CLATTERS LOUDLY as it rolls through the lab door. STU-BONE'S\r\nHANDS grope through the doorway - but the FEMALE BABOON has got him by\r\nthe pants leg and won't let go, no matter how much he rattles the cage.\r\nHe can't quite pull himself through the door...\r\n\r\nHe unbuckles the belt. UNZIPS HIS PANTS. Keeps clawing toward the\r\nbeaker. But he still can't quite make it, and the BABOON won't let go.\r\n\r\nNow his pants are down around his knees. He keeps wriggling until his\r\npants legs are entirely INSIDE OUT - and still he can't quite reach the\r\nbeaker! His shoes are caught in his pants cuffs! RRRRRIPPPPP...\r\n\r\nFreedom! Minus his pants, he GRABS THE BEAKER.\r\n\r\nIn FG through all this is a dim teenage JANITOR pushing his electric\r\nfloor polisher. He has his Walkman on and he can't hear any of the\r\nmayhem behind him. He sings along atonally with the music:\r\n\r\n JANITOR\r\n Gettin' jiggy wit' it - gettin' jiggy wit' it...\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA disheveled STU-BONE, back from his secret mission, is trying to take\r\nhis clothes off so he won't wake JULIE. But she starts to rouse, so he\r\njumps into bed fully dressed and pulls up the covers.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu? Is that you? Where did you go?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Me? Nowhere. I was asleep.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Baby, don't lie. I know you went out.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Not me. Nope. You must've been dreaming.\r\n\r\nShe pulls the covers back. He's still wearing his topcoat, shoes, socks,\r\nand shorts...but NO PANTS.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n You're wearing a topcoat, Stu. - Where are your\r\n pants?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Well, Miss Smarty, if I didn't go out, I\r\n wouldn't need any pants. Now would I?\r\n\r\nHe pulls the covers up to his chin. The two of them lie there in the\r\ndark staring up at the ceiling.\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S LIVING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nThe entire Monkeybone brain trust has come to visit: HERB, syndicate\r\nhead MR. BOWERS, and several CORPORATE REPS hoping to arrange tie-in\r\ndeals. Host STU-BONE has started to take on a simian look: more\r\nprominent ears, flared nostrils, heavy beard stubble, etc.\r\n\r\nThe BURGER GOD REP sets a tray of FAST FOOD in front of STU-BONE - the\r\npackaging all covered with angelic haloed Monkeybones.\r\n\r\n BURGER GOD REP\r\n As you know, Burger God has 1700 outlets\r\n nationwide...we're prepared to back a major TV\r\n buy to launch our Mega Monkey Meal.\r\n (beat)\r\n Go ahead. Try a bite.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE takes a bite out of his Monkeyburger - looks pleased at first -\r\nthen begins PICKING something out of his teeth.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n What's the matter?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n I think it's a pig hair.\r\n (examining a contract)\r\n How much is McDonald's offering?\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Less.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE immediately signs the contract and shakes hands with the BURGER\r\nGOD REP. HERB consults his agenda.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Oh, here's something. The city zoo is kicking\r\n off a fund-raising campaign. They wonder if\r\n you'd be willing to appear at a benefit.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n How much?\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Well, nothing. It's a benefit. But we could\r\n probably get People and Entertainment Tonight to\r\n cover it.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n I get it. We could give the public the\r\n impression that we were doing something...\r\n charitable. Brilliant!!\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n And last...you remember Bill here, from the\r\n Bazoom Toy Company? He's got a little something\r\n I think you'll like.\r\n\r\nThe TOY REP sets a LOCKBOX on the table. A stencil on the box reads \"TOP\r\nSECRET.\" He pulls out a key and opens it to reveal...\r\n\r\n...a tuxedoed, collector's-edition MONKEYBONE DOLL lying on a bed of\r\nCRUSHED PURPLE VELVET. He carefully removes the treasure from its chest.\r\nIts right hand is hinged. The doll's thumb is UP ITS REAR.\r\n\r\n BAZOOM TOY REP\r\n It's a prototype. Code name \"Little Jack\r\n Horner.\" Go on - pull out his thumb.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE stares at the doll - cautiously yanks its thumb out. We go to\r\nSLO-MO as the rising arm causes a NOXIOUS AEROSOL SPRAY to shoot out of\r\nMonkeybone's ass!\r\n\r\nAnd we STAY in slo-mo as STU-BONE stares at the doll in wonderment and\r\nawe...a man in looooove.\r\n\r\nStill in slo-mo, the EXECS crack up, gag, hold their noses at the awful\r\nstank of it. STU-BONE is the only one not laughing. He reaches out to\r\ntouch the doll - to fondle it adoringly -\r\n\r\n- and suddenly we're back to REAL-TIME.\r\n\r\n BAZOOM TOY REP\r\n You know kids - they love anything gross...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Kids? Kids?! This is a work of genius. This is\r\n art. This is the answer to all my prayers!\r\n (beat)\r\n Say - just a technical question - could you fill\r\n these babies up with a particulate solution of\r\n one part chemical enzyme to ten parts water?\r\n\r\n BAZOOM EXEC\r\n Well - I guess...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Aww righhhhht!\r\n\r\nHe breaks into RIOTOUS LAUGHTER and begins blasting monkeyfarts at HERB\r\nand the EXECS, who dive for cover under the conference table.\r\n\r\nEXT. STU AND JULIE'S HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nLaughter and back-slapping as STU-BONE walks his guests to their cars.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n So here's my idea. We do a giveaway at the zoo\r\n benefit. We get a big pińata. We fill it with\r\n Monkeybone dolls - hundreds of 'em.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n A pińata. That's a great idea!\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n You guys don't know it, but you just saved my\r\n ass!\r\n\r\nWith a big grin, he pantomimes sticking a thumb up his ass, in obvious\r\nimitation of the doll, and then gives the thumbs-up sign. The unnerved\r\nEXECS gape at him as he goes back inside - he's developed an odd, loping\r\ngait, and his arms swing outward in wide arcs as he walks.\r\n\r\n BURGER GOD EXEC\r\n Interesting fellow.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n Head trauma.\r\n\r\nINT. STU'S KITCHEN - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nHe digs around under the sink, finds the purple beaker of ONEIRIX. Looks\r\nat the FARTING DOLL...and GRINS.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n This'll get him off my back!\r\n\r\nINSERT - TV SCREEN\r\n\r\nA PROMO for the MONKEYBONE cartoon show. MONKEYBONE swings across the\r\nscreen on a vine, followed by a string of grinning, live-action FANS\r\ndoing a scratch 'n' sniff, pull-out-a-plum LINE DANCE.\r\n\r\n ANNOUNCER\r\n It's his world - we just live in it. Monkeybone!\r\n Back with six all-new episodes, starting -\r\n\r\nINT. LIVING ROOM - REVERSE ANGLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nA distraught JULIE mutes the TV. Her friend ALICE is on the sofa beside\r\nher, having coffee and dessert.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n The thing is, I'm responsible for the way he's\r\n acting. It's the nightmare juice. It's got to\r\n be.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Julie, that stuff probably saved his life.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I can't explain this, Alice, but I'm not so sure\r\n it did. It's as if...he's not Stu any more. The\r\n Stu I love is gone!\r\n (beat)\r\n He spends all his time in the garage. He says\r\n he's...autographing.\r\n\r\nINT. GARAGE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nTIGHT ON the flask of ONEIRIX as STU-BONE picks it up.\r\n\r\nHe's wearing a GAS MASK. He's rigged a CLOTHESLINE in the garage.\r\nMONKEYBONE DOLLS are clipped to it, ass-end up - forming a makeshift\r\nASSEMBLY LINE. He dips a TURKEY BASTER into the flask...withdraws a\r\nquantity of purple fluid...plucks the FINGER out of the first doll's\r\nbehind...\r\n\r\n- and plunges the TURKEY BASTER into the doll's hindquarters, filling it\r\nwith ONEIRIX!! The doll's buttocks take on the purple hue characteristic\r\nof Orangutans in heat. STU-BONE holds the doll at arm's length and pulls\r\nits finger - launching a purple puff of SPIKED NIGHTMARE GAS.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Yeah, baby! Nightmare-in-a-butt!\r\n (looking around)\r\n Okay...guinea pig, guinea pig...\r\n\r\nEXT. GARAGE/BACK YARD - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE steps out into the driveway and hears a low growl - BUSTER is\r\ngiving him the stinkeye from behind the picket fence. STU-BONE's eyes\r\nlight up with inspiration.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n C'mere, boy...c'mere, ole buddy...\r\n\r\nINT. LIVING ROOM - A MOMENT LATER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nLOUD BARKING outside. JULIE wanders over toward the window.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Listen. Let's bring him in for some tests. I\r\n guarantee you're overreacting.\r\n\r\nJULIE lifts the curtain - and sees STU-BONE in his gas mask, bent over\r\nin a weird crab like stance, chasing BUSTER around the yard with the\r\nMonkeybone doll.\r\n\r\nJULIE doesn't seem especially surprised - but ALICE's mouth falls open.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Actually, no, I don't think I'm overreacting.\r\n\r\nEXT. BACK YARD - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nBUSTER is apparently ALONE now - he's pacing in circles under a HIGH\r\nTREE BRANCH, staring up and GROWLING. Someone throws a PINE CONE at the\r\npicket fence. BUSTER'S HEAD TURNS, just for an instant -\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n KREEEGAHHHH!!!\r\n\r\n- and STU-BONE plunges out of the tree, DIRECTLY ON TOP OF THE DOG! The\r\ntwo of them GRAPPLE, rolling around on the grass.\r\n\r\nFor a moment it looks like this battle royale could go either way. Then\r\nSTU-BONE gets on top of BUSTER, STRADDLES HIM, shoves the ASS of the\r\nMonkeybone doll up against his muzzle...\r\n\r\nFOONT! A purple cloud of NIGHTMARE GAS hits BUSTER in the face. The dog\r\ngoes limp. His eyes roll back in his head. He starts to TWITCH.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Sweet dreams, you little bastard!\r\n\r\nDisheveled but triumphant, STU-BONE stands up, pounds his chest with\r\nboth fists, and lets out a Tarzanian ROAR. Lights go on all over the\r\nneighborhood. ANGRY NEIGHBORS poke their heads out the windows.\r\n\r\nINT. GARAGE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE skulks back into the garage. He throws back a tarp, revealing\r\nHUNDREDS of boxed Monkeybone dolls, stacked so high they fill an entire\r\nwall of the garage. He pulls out his turkey baster, cranks up the\r\nclothesline, and goes to work.\r\n\r\nEXT. BACK YARD - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nCAMERA TRACKS IN on the twitching face of BUSTER, and we see\r\n\r\nBUSTER'S DREAM (BLACK & WHITE)\r\n\r\nA German-expressionist nightmare, all low angles and heavy shadows.\r\nWe're in some kind of OPERATING ROOM, where a struggling PATIENT is\r\nbeing wheeled in on a tall, creaking GURNEY. Four ORDERLIES in surgical\r\nmasks are holding him down.\r\n\r\nThe PATIENT is BUSTER. And the ORDERLIES...are CATS.\r\n\r\nA CAT SURGEON draws the sheet back. Looks at the spreadeagled BUSTER.\r\nAnd brandishes a big nasty pair of GARDEN SHEARS.\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe Dark Town audience is scratching its collective head at Buster's\r\ndream, which is showing in one of HYP'S NIGHTMARE ORBS. An angry HYPNOS\r\nslams down the phone and storms across the dance floor to his big\r\ncircular bed.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Dog dreams!! That stinkin' monkey. I can't\r\n believe it. We give him a body, and he sends us\r\n ...dogs.\r\n\r\nA FELINE BEAUTY embraces him from behind, pulls him onto the bed.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Let's not think about dogs. Let's think about\r\n pussycats. Meeowwwwwwrrrr....\r\n\r\nShe draws ONE SHARP CLAW lightly down his chest. He gives her a now-\r\nyou're-talkin' grin and hits a switch - causing the big circular bed to\r\nROTATE off the dance floor and into the boudoir.\r\n\r\nAs it turns, we see KITTY'S PAW closing discreetly around a KEY CHAIN on\r\nthe nightstand...\r\n\r\nINT. DUNGEON - RIGHT\r\n\r\nSTU's curled up on the dank floor when he's awakened by the sound of a\r\nVISITOR in the corridor outside - KITTY. She passes a sack containing\r\nFOOD and BOTTLED WATER through the bars - and SHUSHES the astonished STU\r\nbefore he can speak.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Shh! You'll need it when you're traveling.\r\n\r\nGlancing back at the GUARDS, she pulls a KEY from her cleavage.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Don't ask where I got it.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You can't do this! You'll get in trouble!\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n You're the only true-hearted man I ever met. You\r\n find a way back to that girl of yours and make\r\n her happy.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n How am I gonna get past the guards?\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n I'll worry about the guards.\r\n (loudly)\r\n OKAY, STU. SEE YOU IN A DAY OR TWO.\r\n\r\nShe turns down the corridor. STU stands there for a beat, GAPING at the\r\nkey in his hand.\r\n\r\nThen he hears the sound of CARNAGE outside. A FEROCIOUS, BLOODY BATTLE\r\nseems to be underway. Realizing that KITTY must be in trouble, he uses\r\nthe key to unlock the dungeon door.\r\n\r\nINT. DUNGEON - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nHe finds KITTY hunched in the corner on all fours, surrounded by blood\r\nand tufts of fur and an abandoned GUARD'S HAT.\r\n\r\n KITTY\r\n Go. Just go.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Thanks, Kitty, I'll never forget you for th--\r\n\r\nShe looks up at him, feline eyes aglow. There's a three-foot-long\r\nRODENT'S TAIL dangling out of her mouth.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'll really...never...forget you.\r\n\r\nHe races off as KITTY resumes her feast. The sound of fighting has\r\nroused the other DUNGEON DWELLERS, and when they realize the dungeon\r\ndoor is open they come rushing out en masse.\r\n\r\nThen the PANEL opens. They hear FOOD raining down behind them. HITCHCOCK\r\nis the first to turn back - then STEPHEN KING - then ATILLA. A moment\r\nlater they're back to their old habits, climbing over one another to get\r\nat a half-empty box of Raisinets.\r\n\r\n WIPE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. SLEEP LAB - DAY\r\n\r\nThe usual gang sitting around at their computer terminals, etc. JULIE is\r\ncoolly reading NOTEBOOK ENTRIES into a TAPE RECORDER.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n \"4/17: Subject, when unaware of observation,\r\n prefers to hold eating utensils...with feet.\r\n Successfully carves turkey roll holding eating\r\n utensils...with feet.\"\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n They had a case like that at Johns Hopkins.\r\n Wires got crossed between hands and feet.\r\n\r\n CLARISSA\r\n Great lead. I'll try and find it on the net.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n \"4/18: Subject climbs backyard tree...to perform\r\n elimination. When confronted with product...\r\n blames it on family dog.\"\r\n\r\nDEAD SILENCE from the mortified group. They never had a case like that\r\nat Johns Hopkins. JULIE somehow keeps a stiff upper lip - deeply\r\nembarrassed for STU, but a scientist nonetheless.\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n Seems perfectly obvious. He's been possessed by\r\n a monkey!\r\n\r\nThe others all GLOWER at HUTCH for this egregious display of bad taste.\r\n\r\nEXT. GARAGE - AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE and HERB are standing outside the garage in formal attire as a\r\ncrew of ZOO WORKERS load MONKEYBONE DOLLS into a pickup.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n You're really gonna pop the question?\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Got the ring. Got the airline tickets. Soon as\r\n they break that pińata, we'll grab a cab - and\r\n it's off to the land of palm trees and coconuts.\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n I can't believe you. You used to hate being the\r\n center of attention. Now you're proposing, in\r\n public, at a benefit.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Yeah, I was thinking...I mean, I'm a celebrity\r\n now, do I really want to get married? But on the\r\n other hand, if you're married, they can't\r\n testify against you.\r\n\r\nHERB wonders if this is a joke, decides it is, and forces a chuckle.\r\n\r\nINT. BEDROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nJULIE is getting dressed for the benefit when the PHONE RINGS.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Hello? Oh, Hutch - what?\r\n\r\nINTERCUT - JULIE AND HUTCH\r\n\r\nHUTCH is at the sleep lab, standing over the open refrigerator.\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n The Nightmare Juice! It's gone! Somebody\r\n switched it for a beaker of grape Kool-Aid!!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Kool-Aid!? But who'd would want to -\r\n\r\nHer eyes move to the WINDOW - to STU-BONE out by the garage.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Okay. Call the police. I'll be right over.\r\n\r\nINT. SLEEP LAB - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nTwo DETECTIVES examining the scene of the crime.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n The technical name is Oneirix. It's an enzyme.\r\n It's present in the brains of -\r\n\r\n DETECTIVE\r\n (cutting her off; writing)\r\n Yeah, yeah...Nightmare juice.\r\n\r\n DETECTIVE II\r\n And there's been no sign of a break-in?\r\n\r\n HUTCH\r\n Holy shit...the pants.\r\n (remembering)\r\n The janitor found a pair of torn-up pants. It\r\n was the same night the monkey tipped her cage\r\n over. Remember that, Julie?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n (suddenly afraid)\r\n Yeah...I remember it vividly.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - DAY\r\n\r\nLIVERIED WAITERS scurrying all about in preparation for the benefit. ZOO\r\nWORKERS set up tables and chairs underneath a giant CANOPY.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE watches with satisfaction as the last of the DOLLS is loaded\r\ninto a giant pińata in the shape of STANLEY.\r\n\r\n WIPE TO:\r\n\r\nINT. DEATH'S OFFICE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe big creaky swivel chair swings around, revealing DEATH.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Now, if I may ask - what kind of idiot sneaks\r\n into the Land of Death twice?\r\n\r\nThe party he's addressing is STU - who's stretched out horizontally,\r\nstrapped to a medieval TORTURE RACK, with a whole posse of GRIM REAPERS\r\nstanding guard around him.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n You're mad at me. Great. You have every right to\r\n be. But we're both mad at Dark Town. We're both\r\n mad at Hypnos.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Oh, sure. Now you're gonna tell me it was all\r\n his idea. You were completely innocent -\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I'm not going to tell you that. I wanted that E-\r\n ticket. I wanted it so bad I'd stare you right\r\n in the face to get it - and I'd do the same\r\n again.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Why??\r\n\r\n STU\r\n I have a girl up there. And I never - I\r\n should've - I just want to tell her I love her.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n I'm a simple man. I'm just doing my job. I enjoy\r\n my job. Why does everyone want to make it\r\n difficult for me? Stealing tickets, switching\r\n bodies...it is so irresponsible.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Death, I'm trying to make things right. Take my\r\n soul. Turn me into a paper doll. But give me\r\n just one lousy hour.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Well - you'd need a body.\r\n\r\nDEATH gestures for the REAPERS to unshackle STU.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n If it wasn't for that comic strip of yours, I\r\n wouldn't be doing this. But a good chuckle is\r\n darned hard to come by.\r\n (chortling)\r\n That one where Monkeybone stole the soap cake\r\n out of the urinal - I thought I would die.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Coming from you, that's quite a compliment.\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n De nada. Now, come here...bend over...before I\r\n change my mind.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Bend over?\r\n\r\nDEATH rears back and KICKS HIM, full-force, SMACK IN THE ASS. The\r\nsupernatural might of the blow sends STU ROCKETING UPWARD THROUGH THE\r\nCEILING!!\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL - OPERATING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nA TEAM OF SURGEONS. The lead SURGEON has his arm buried up to the elbow\r\nin the open torso of an ORGAN DONOR.\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n Okay...detaching the left kidney...\r\n\r\nSCREAMS ALL AROUND as the ORGAN DONOR sits BOLT UPRIGHT! The startled\r\nSURGEON drops the kidney back into place.\r\n\r\n ORGAN DONOR\r\n What the - who the hell am I??\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n You're an organ donor!\r\n\r\n ORGAN DONOR\r\n Am I dead?!?\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n The chute didn't open. We kind of assumed -\r\n\r\n ORGAN DONOR\r\n I need this body. Just for a few minutes. I'll\r\n bring it back, okay?\r\n\r\nThe ORGAN DONOR grabs a lab coat from a nearby rack and races out. (And\r\nsince STU is temporarily occupying the DONOR's body, we will henceforth\r\nrefer to him as O.D. STU.)\r\n\r\nINT. HOSPITAL CORRIDOR - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nO.D. STU comes racing around a corridor. His LAB COAT is already covered\r\nwith gore, and he's having trouble holding his GUTS in. His PANCREAS\r\nspills out onto the floor just as two DOCTORS stroll past.\r\n\r\n DOCTOR\r\n (eyeing the pancreas)\r\n Might have someone take a look at that.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n Oh. Yeah. Thanks.\r\n\r\nThe DOCTORS move on. O.D. STU spots a JANITOR'S CART with a roll of DUCT\r\nTAPE on one shelf. He WRAPS IT TIGHTLY around his midsection to keep his\r\ninnards from falling out. Then he runs for it.\r\n\r\nNow the TEAM OF SURGEONS rounds the corner in hot pursuit. The lead\r\nSURGEON spots O.D. STU at the end of the corridor and takes off after\r\nhim. But he SLIPS on the PANCREAS and goes sprawling!\r\n\r\nThe pancreas goes flying down the hall, where it gets SQUASHED in rapid\r\nsuccession by a GURNEY and by a little old lady's MOTORIZED WHEELCHAIR.\r\nWhen the SURGEONS retrieve it, it's a hunk of pulp.\r\n\r\n LEAD SURGEON\r\n I think it can still be saved. Put it on ice.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - DAY\r\n\r\nGUESTS are beginning to arrive for the benefit. In the cages and\r\nhabitats, animals stare up at a gigantic MONKEYBONE BALLOON.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - ANOTHER ANGLE - DAY\r\n\r\nThe BAZOOM TOY REP is rounding a corner when HERB pops out from behind a\r\ntree and BLASTS HIM with a jolt of purple gas from a Monkeybone doll! He\r\nsputters and coughs...\r\n\r\nThen he grabs the doll away and blasts HERB right back! The two of them\r\nchase each other around the tree, giggling. The BAZOOM REP'S WIFE, in\r\nher formal gown, affects a look of supreme mortification.\r\n\r\nEXT. STU'S HOUSE - BACK YARD - DAY\r\n\r\nO.D. STU climbs over the fence, finds a hidden key, and lets himself in.\r\n\r\nINT. HOUSE - STUDIO - DAY\r\n\r\nO.D. STU rushes frantically from room to room.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU (o.s.)\r\n DOC? DOC?? - JULIE?\r\n\r\nNo reply - the joint's empty. O.D. STU enters the studio and spots a\r\nNEWSPAPER on his drafting table. The paper is folded back to a big\r\nDISPLAY AD for the benefit: \"MEET STU MILEY AND MONKEYBONE - 8 PM\r\nTONIGHT!\" He checks the wall clock: time is short.\r\n\r\nReaching into the drawer of the drafting table, he pulls out a TACKLE\r\nBOX which contains old brushes...and a small VELVET BOX. O.D. STU opens\r\nthe velvet box to reveal Grandma's ANTIQUE RING.\r\n\r\nHe hears GROWLING behind him - it's BUSTER. The dog looks up, cocks his\r\nhead - and begins WAGGING HIS TAIL. Somehow, even though STU's in a\r\ndifferent body, BUSTER recognizes him.\r\n\r\nEXT. STU AND JULIE'S HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nO.D. STU exits, ring in hand. Behind him, BUSTER is throwing a fit -\r\nbarking, FLINGING himself at the screen door. He wants to come along!\r\n\r\nA BUS pulls up at the corner, and O.D. STU boards it. BUSTER throws\r\neverything he's got at the door - and it gives! He takes off after STU.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - GROUNDS - DAY\r\n\r\nAs HERB is walking toward the refreshment table, an ODD LOOK crosses his\r\nface. All at once he begins to TUG at his collar. He yanks his TIE off\r\n...doffs his JACKET onto the pavement...\r\n\r\nPOV HERB - PSYCHO-VISION\r\n\r\nThe nightmare drug is kicking in! The whole zoo SWIMS around him. All at\r\nonce he's being ATTACKED...by a HORDE of EMPTY CLOTHES!!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - GROUNDS - DAY\r\n\r\nJULIE has arrived at the zoo. She's wandering zombie-like through the\r\nfood court, flanked by her friends ALICE and CLARISSA.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Whatever he's done, I'm responsible for it.\r\n\r\n CLARISSA\r\n That's not true, Julie. It's not true.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n This is not about your guilt, Julie. There could\r\n be innocent people in danger.\r\n\r\n CLARISSA\r\n He's not the same guy. He's not your Stu.\r\n (beat)\r\n I didn't want to tell you this, but the other\r\n day he pinched me on the butt.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n I didn't want to tell you this, but the other\r\n day he tried to mount me from behind! Look, you\r\n have to tell the police.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Tell them what? I don't know anything concrete.\r\n All I have is a feeling.\r\n\r\nAll of a sudden, they hear SHOUTS and LAUGHTER from the area of the\r\nreptile house. In the distance, ZOO SECURITY GUARDS are chasing a NAKED\r\nMAN through the crowds of formally-dressed partygoers.\r\n\r\n CLARISSA\r\n Oh my God, we've got a flasher.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n That...that's Herb!\r\n\r\nThe GUARDS catch hold of HERB and drag him away past JULIE, ALICE, and\r\nCLARISSA. He doesn't recognize any of them. He's PSYCHOTIC:\r\n\r\n HERB\r\n CLOTHES! Beware of clothes. They're working\r\n together. All of them. Shirts...pants...\r\n ENSEMBLES...!\r\n\r\nThe three women exchange looks of stupefied HORROR.\r\n\r\nINT. MUNI BUS - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nPASSENGERS are holding their noses, frantically pulling on the BELL ROPE\r\nto alert the driver that they want off. As we move toward the back we\r\nsee O.D. STU sitting alone, with rows of empty seats on either side.\r\n\r\nHe looks rough. He's bone-white, his taped-up lab coat is crusted with\r\nblood, and he never did find any shoes. Also, it's a hot night and he's\r\nstarting to get a little ripe. FLIES are buzzing all around him.\r\n\r\nEXT. STREETS - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nBUSTER runs down the sidewalk as fast as his stumpy little legs will\r\ncarry him, in pursuit of the BUS.\r\n\r\nINT. CAR - MOVING - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nThe team of SURGEONS has been tracking O.D. STU across the city! Through\r\nthe windshield they see the BUS pulling up outside the zoo. O.D. STU\r\nhops out and sprints across the parking lot.\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n IT'S HIM! HE'S GETTING OFF!\r\n\r\nINT. ZOO - ENTRANCE - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nO.D. STU doesn't even stop at the ticket window. He VAULTS over the\r\nturnstile, knocking benefit guests aside. The SURGEONS aren't far\r\nbehind. They race up to the ticket window -\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n Did you see a corpse running this way?\r\n\r\nThe TICKET-TAKER shrugs and points off in O.D. STU's direction.\r\n\r\nINT. BANQUET TENT - THAT MOMENT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nThe last stages of dinner. WAITERS are already clearing plates, and\r\nalthough JULIE has barely touched her food she sends her plate away.\r\n\r\nOnstage a BAND is playing tasteful zoo jazz. When the number ends, STU-\r\nBONE approaches the dais and leans into the mike.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n As emcee I want to thank you all for joining us\r\n at this swingin' bash...it's a special night for\r\n the birds, and the lions, and the monkeys, but\r\n it's also a special night for -\r\n (tapping his chest)\r\n - this monkey. And it's special because of a\r\n very special lady. Her name is -\r\n (checking a note in his pocket)\r\n Julie McElroy. Just kiddin', Julie. Stand up.\r\n\r\nJULIE stands reluctantly. The CROWD APPLAUDS.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n And to make this special night extra-special,\r\n I'd like to do a special number...especially for\r\n you.\r\n\r\nA DISCO BALL lowers. STU-BONE turns to welcome a group of BACKUP SOUL\r\nSINGERS who are just joining the band on stage.\r\n\r\nThe TENT begins to ROCK with a throbbing beat. And STU-BONE launches\r\ninto a wild-eyed, hip-shaking parody of Mick Jagger singing the Rolling\r\nStones' \"MONKEY MAN\"!\r\n\r\nAs he sings, STU-BONE gyrates over toward JULIE, bumping and grinding\r\nlike the cartoon-monkey sex machine he is. He waves his mike to the\r\ncrowd, urging everyone to join in. JULIE gasps in disbelief, but the\r\ncrowd is eating it up - clapping and singing along with STU-BONE.\r\n\r\nHe gestures for pretty women to join him out on the floor. He opens his\r\nshirt at the neck, exposing a hitherto unseen plenitude of chest hair.\r\n\r\nHe pulls out a hanky to mop his brow and tosses it to the crowd. He\r\nwipes his armpits with a second hanky and tosses it to the crowd. He\r\nblows his nose into a third and tosses it to the crowd.\r\n\r\nThen he JUMPS UP ON THE TABLES and shakes his booty wildly, strutting in\r\nand out among the dessert plates. If the real Jagger could see him, he\r\nwould creep home a sad and broken man.\r\n\r\nFor the big finale, he jumps off the table and SLIDES ACROSS THE FLOOR\r\nto JULIE'S table - arriving ON HIS KNEES.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n I am just a Monkey Man! I'm glad you are a\r\n monkey...woman...too.\r\n (soft voice)\r\n How about it, Julie?\r\n\r\nHe pulls out a RING BOX and hands it to the beet-red JULIE. The crowd\r\nlets out a collective GASP - followed by WILD APPLAUSE.\r\n\r\nShe stares down at the ring - a big vulgar sparkler. She can't speak.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n We'll hop a plane tonight. An island ceremony.\r\n An Abba Dabba honeymoon!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n It looks so...new.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n It is new. Why wouldn't it be new?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n But the heirloom ring. Your grandmother's\r\n ring...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Heirloom? Huh? You want a used ring - ?\r\n\r\nNo reply. She's taking a long time to say yes. The audience is\r\nmuttering.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Ju-leeee... Operators are standing by... Offer\r\n expires at midnight, December 31...\r\n\r\nSuddenly a GORE-STAINED FIGURE bursts into the tent.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n DOC! DOC! DON'T DO IT! HE ISN'T STU! HE'S\r\n MONKEYBONE!!!\r\n\r\nJULIE's jaw drops. She barely gets a glimpse of O.D. STU before the ZOO\r\nGUARDS arrive to haul him away.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Boy, the nuts are out tonight. What'd that creep\r\n call you - ?\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n He called me \"Doc.\"\r\n\r\n- which STU-BONE never does. Someone in the crowd yells...\r\n\r\n GUEST\r\n HEY MONKEYBONE!!\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE turns and does a simian COMEDY SHTICK for the crowd.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n That's me, folks! Monkeybone! Let's party!\r\n\r\nBy the time he's done scratching his ribs, JULIE has vanished!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO GROUNDS - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nShe races out of the tent - grabs a passing ZOO GUARD.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Please. Where did you take that man...?\r\n\r\nThe GUARD points to an ANIMAL CONTROL VAN. JULIE sees O.D. STU peering\r\nout through a small barred panel. Their eyes meet...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Who are you? Why did you say those things?\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n Oh, Doc, it's all a mixup. We were in the land\r\n of death. He stole my e-ticket. That's how he\r\n got my body, see? All they had left for me was\r\n this corpse!\r\n\r\nJULIE digests this, nods professionally, and turns to walk away.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n Don't walk away, Doc! He's only here to give\r\n people nightmares!\r\n (no response)\r\n Doc! Please! Don't you remember the dream? They\r\n were pulling the plug - I called out to you -\r\n and you heard me. Remember?\r\n\r\nThis stops JULIE cold. Her spine is tingling. She turns slowly, a single\r\ntear rolling down her cheek. And then...\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n BUSTER?!?\r\n\r\nThe dog runs right past JULIE and bounds up to the animal control van,\r\nbarking his head off. Now JULIE is starting to believe. She turns -\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stu...how?\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n I had to come back, Julie. I had to give you\r\n this.\r\n\r\nTHROUGH THE BARS he hands her the little box containing Grandma's\r\nantique ring.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n I meant to give it to you before. The night we\r\n crashed. I was so happy, Julie, I...try to\r\n remember me like that, okay? Not like this.\r\n\r\nShe slips the ring on her finger - looks up at O.D. STU with TEARS\r\nWELLING in her eyes. He makes an odd SNORKELING kind of noise.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What's wrong?\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n I'm crying too. I just don't have any tears. I'm\r\n all dried up.\r\n\r\nJULIE TURNS. The two DETECTIVES we saw in the sleep lab have just\r\narrived at the gate, and ALICE and CLARISSA are leading them over.\r\n\r\n ALICE\r\n Detective, please let this man out of the van.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO GROUNDS - PIŃATA AREA - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nThe PARTYGOERS are lined up under the gigantic Stanley-shaped PIŃATA,\r\nwhich is hanging from a tree. A TUBBY BANKER in a blindfold takes a good\r\nhard whack. CRACKS are beginning to appear...\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Okay, folks, it's pińata time - you know the\r\n rules - five bucks a pop - and remember, it's\r\n all for the benefit of our friends the animals!\r\n (eyes brightening)\r\n Oooooh! This one's on me!\r\n\r\nThe next contestant is a GORGEOUS WOMAN. He blindfolds her and embraces\r\nher from behind to help her with her grip on the bat.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Choke up, baby. That's right. Choke up!\r\n\r\nSuddenly he notices the COPS marching up with JULIE, O.D. STU and co. in\r\ntow. He freezes, terrified - BACKS AWAY from the BABE -\r\n\r\n- and catches a BAT IN THE FACE. Several people rush up to help him as\r\nthe COPS consult with the BENEFIT ORGANIZERS...\r\n\r\n ORGANIZER\r\n I don't understand, officer. This is a benefit.\r\n Surely this can wait until -\r\n\r\n COP\r\n Sorry, ma'am...we need to question Mr. Miley on\r\n a most urgent matter.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Stop this. Now. Those dolls have been tampered\r\n with. They're toxic!\r\n\r\nO.D. STU comes marching through the crowd. He passes a LIFE-SIZED\r\nDISPLAY of Stanley and Monkeybone...GRABS THE BACKPACK off the Stanley\r\nfigure...and proceeds deliberately toward STU-BONE.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n MONKEYBONE...BACK IN THE PACK.\r\n\r\nThe old command seems to retain its magical power, because STU-BONE\r\nclutches his gut as if stricken at the sound of it.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n I mean it this time. Back in the pack.\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE bends over - jerks and twitches - becoming more SIMIAN by the\r\nmoment as O.D. STU approaches.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Stu...I can explain...I was sick of being a\r\n figment, see? It's awful being a figment. It's\r\n degrading! And I never really wanted to give\r\n people nightmares. I just told 'em that so\r\n they'd help me get a body.\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n Yeah - my body. Back in the pack, you simian\r\n shitbird!\r\n\r\nThe COPS are tres confused by all this -\r\n\r\n COP\r\n Ma'am, can you give me some idea of what's going\r\n on here?\r\n\r\n- but JULIE holds them back so the scene can play itself out. Now STU-\r\nBONE is doing a weird little monkey dance - PLAYING UP to the puzzled\r\ncrowd, who laugh and snicker, wondering what to make of all this.\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Laugh, damn you...laugh at the sidekick...the\r\n happy little monkey. He doesn't have any\r\n feelings. He's just a figment of your\r\n immagination!\r\n\r\nHe turns suddenly - GRABS THE BAT from the puzzled BABE -\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n GIMME THAT GODDAM BAT!\r\n\r\nHe wails on the pińata like Ken Griffey Jr. O.D. STU tries to stop him,\r\nbut it's too late - the pińata BURSTS, and hundreds of PURPLE-ASSED\r\nMONKEYBONE DOLLS spill out onto the ground!\r\n\r\nAn equal number of RABID PARTYGOERS surge forward to scoop them up. The\r\nCOPS swing into action, trying to hold the crowd back...\r\n\r\n COP\r\n HE'S GETTING AWAY!\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE climbs a tree and JUMPS from a branch onto one of the TWIN\r\nJUNGLE TOWERS at the pavilion - begins CLIMBING toward the giant\r\nMONKEYBONE BALLOON moored up above!\r\n\r\nO.D. STU sees him - pulls away from JULIE -\r\n\r\n O.D. STU\r\n I LOVE YOU!\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n STU!!\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE unties the mooring rope and wraps it around his midsection. Now\r\nfreed, the balloon LIFTS INTO THE AIR, CARRYING HIM ALOFT!\r\n\r\nO.D. STU climbs up the opposite tower as the balloon starts to drift\r\naway. He GRABS HOLD of the MOORING ROPE as it whips past.\r\n\r\nAnd the TEAM OF SURGEONS - who have been combing the grounds in search\r\nof O.D. STU - catch sight of him just as he FLOATS OFF INTO THE AIR, ON\r\nTHE END OF THE ROPE!\r\n\r\n HEAD SURGEON\r\n LOOK! IT'S HIM!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO GROUNDS - ON BALLOON - MOVING\r\n\r\nThey rise to an altitude of ten or twelve feet. But O.D. STU's\r\nadditional weight pulls the balloon back DOWN - and both of them hit the\r\nground! They have to RUN at top speed just to keep pace with the\r\nballoon!\r\n\r\n STU-BONE\r\n Let...go...you...dingleberry...\r\n\r\nAs he's trying to KICK O.D. STU off the rope, a GUST OF WIND catches the\r\nballoon and LIFTS IT HIGH INTO THE AIR.\r\n\r\nFor about three seconds. The boys tumble to earth, off-balance, in a\r\nheap, BOUNCING along the pavement. The balloon pulls them over a\r\nWROUGHT-IRON FENCE and drags them through the ALLIGATOR PIT. Giant jaws\r\nsnap as the boys glide overhead like bait on a hook.\r\n\r\nAs the balloon LIFTS UP AGAIN, O.D. STU hauls himself along the length\r\nof the rope.\r\n\r\nHe gets close enough to GRAB STU-BONE's LEG. STU-BONE reaches down to\r\npush him away...grabs a fistful of DUCT TAPE...\r\n\r\n...and RIP! The tape TEARS - exposing the great big GASH in O.D. STU's\r\nmidsection! He tries to pull himself together...\r\n\r\nEXT. FOOD COURT - THAT MOMENT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nA SERVER ladles out a cup of PUNCH from a big silver PUNCHBOWL.\r\nSomething PINK comes plummeting out of the sky - and the next thing he\r\nknows, the SERVER is DRENCHED!\r\n\r\nThe SURGEONS come rushing up. They all stick their hands in the\r\npunchbowl at once...fishing out O.D. STU'S KIDNEY!\r\n\r\n HEAD SURGEON\r\n Put it on ice. I think it can still be saved!\r\n\r\nOne of the TEAM finds an ice cooler full of soft drinks. In it goes.\r\n\r\nEXT. TIGER HABITAT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nBOTH BOYS SCREAM as the balloon drags them perilously close to the RAZOR\r\nWIRE atop a tall storm fence.\r\n\r\nThey clear it by inches - but they don't have much time to celebrate.\r\nThey're dangling over the Bengal Tiger exhibit, and the great cats are\r\nLEAPING INTO THE AIR trying to snag them!\r\n\r\nAs O.D. STU squirms out of reach, his LIVER drops out...\r\n\r\nEXT. GROUNDS - TIGER HABITAT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nIt lands close enough to the FENCE that one of the SURGEONS thinks he\r\ncan reach it. He reaches through the bars and sees a pack of BENGAL\r\nTIGERS racing toward him! He manages to grab ONE END of the liver - but\r\na TIGER gets the other end -\r\n\r\n- and it's a TUG-OF-WAR until the tiger BITES the liver in half, sending\r\nthe terrified SURGEON sprawling on the pavement outside the bars! The\r\nHEAD SURGEON examines the remaining half-liver...\r\n\r\n HEAD SURGEON\r\n Put it on ice. I think it can still be saved.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON BALLOON\r\n\r\nSTU-BONE socks O.D. STU hard across the face! He lets go of his incision\r\n...and his SMALL INTESTINE falls out! Since it's still connected at both\r\nends, the intestine forms a great big LOOP...\r\n\r\nEXT. FOOD COURT - SERVING TABLE - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nThe SERVER has just brought out a new PUNCHBOWL full of nice clean\r\npunch. He sets it down on the table and is about to ladle out a cupful\r\nwhen STU flies past overhead. His intestinal LOOP slides across the\r\ntable, knocking over glasses, snagging the PUNCHBOWL at its base...\r\n\r\n...and YANKING IT right off the table! Bystanding GUESTS are DRENCHED in\r\npunch as the punch bowl FLIES END OVER END...\r\n\r\n...and, with the sound of a GONG being struck, BEANS a member of the\r\nSURGICAL TEAM from behind!! Naturally it's the guy who's lugging the ICE\r\nCHEST full of O.D. STU's organs. When the punchbowl strikes, he GOES\r\nDOWN HARD, PITCHING the ice chest...\r\n\r\n... at a pair of COPS who are over by the pińata, loading CONFISCATED\r\nMONKEYBONE DOLLS into a SHOPPING CART. The ICE CHEST knocks them off\r\ntheir feet - and sends the SHOPPING CART rolling downhill!\r\n\r\nThe COPS try to get up, but they skid every which way on the SPILLED ICE\r\nunderneath. On top of which, the SURGICAL TEAM is all over them, playing\r\nGRAB-ASS with the COPS as they try to retrieve precious organs.\r\n\r\nThe HEAD SURGEON kneels beside his fallen comrade, the guy who got\r\nBEANED by the punchbowl, and feels for a pulse.\r\n\r\n HEAD SURGEON\r\n Put him on ice. I think he can still be saved!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO GROUNDS - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nCOPS sprint downhill, trying to intercept the runaway SHOPPING CART full\r\nof confiscated dolls. Too late. The CART slams into a fence and goes\r\nass-over-teakettle, dumping its contents into the PENGUIN HABITAT...\r\n\r\nINT. HYP'S HIDEAWAY - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\nHYPNOS and an audience of DARKTOWNERS peer into the nightmare orb. They\r\nsee a Keystone-Cops vision of fur-clad ESKIMOS, with clubs and\r\nspearguns, amid a colony of terrified PENGUINS.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Not again. THAT STINKING MONKEY!!!\r\n\r\nAERIAL SHOT - STU'S POV - MOVING\r\n\r\nSTU gets an idea as he looks down at his dangling INTESTINE. He begins\r\nFEEDING IT OUT - giving himself more rope to work with - and when it's\r\nlong enough, begins SWINGING IT like a LASSO!\r\n\r\nEXT. WATER BUFFALO HABITAT - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nWATER BUFFALO graze Buddha-like as STU'S INTESTINE snags one of them\r\naround the HORNS. The lasso draws taut - and holds!\r\n\r\nANGLE ON BALLOON - O.D. STU AND STU-BONE\r\n\r\nThe balloon is moored in place again! O.D. STU pulls himself upward,\r\ntoward STU-BONE, who KICKS AT him frantically!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO GROUNDS - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nA COP pulls his sidearm and TAKES AIM at the now-stabilized balloon.\r\n\r\n COP\r\n I think I can bring 'em down.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON BALLOON - MOVING - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nBLAM! The cop's shot hits the giant MONKEYBONE BALLOON smack in the ass.\r\nWith a gale-force helium FART, the balloon ZOOMS UPWARD. The INTESTINE\r\nsnaps. STU-BONE and O.D. STU shoot off into the air!\r\n\r\nON STU-BONE & O.D. STU - AERIAL\r\n\r\nAT APOGEE. They exchange a LOOK as the last gasp of helium hisses out of\r\nthe gigantic balloon. Then it occurs to them to look DOWN...\r\n\r\nTHEIR POV - PARKING LOT - OVERHEAD ANGLE\r\n\r\n...at the tiny CARS parked far, far below. They must be close to a\r\nhundred feet up in the air - and all at once the ground is coming up\r\nfast!\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - ON JULIE & CROWD - LATE AFTERNOON\r\n\r\nJULIE et al SCREAM IN HORROR as the two bodies plunge earthward.\r\n\r\nON STU-BONE & O.D. STU - FALLING\r\n\r\n...and falling and falling until they SMACK INTO the hot asphalt of the\r\nparking lot, the deflated balloon settling over them like a shroud.\r\n\r\nTheir BODIES have stopped - but their SPIRITS keep on falling...\r\n\r\nAERIAL SHOT - SKIES OVER DARK TOWN - NIGHT\r\n\r\n...and the fight continues - even into the afterlife! As they plummet\r\ndown through the heavens, they REVERT to their true personae. It's STU\r\nvs. MONKEYBONE, creator vs. sidekick, still duking it out - like a\r\ncouple of skydivers fighting over a single parachute!\r\n\r\nEXT. STREETS - DARK TOWN - RIGHT\r\n\r\nDARKTOWNERS pour into the streets to watch the epic struggle overhead.\r\nThey're placing bets, rooting their favorites on. Then...\r\n\r\nTHE GROUND SHAKES AND THUNDERS - and the DARKTOWNERS scatter in all\r\ndirections, DIVING for the nearest hiding place. They seem to know what\r\nthis mighty rumbing signifies.\r\n\r\nThe E-TICKET RIDE pops out of the ground - begins to RISE into the air -\r\nand a COLOSSUS appears beneath it! A FIFTY-FOOT WARRIOR clad in JAPANESE\r\nCEREMONIAL ARMOR, he TOWERS over Dark Town, so mighty and enormous that\r\nhe can wear the E-TICKET RIDE as a hat!!\r\n\r\nON STU AND MONKEYBONE - FALLING\r\n\r\nSTU lands a HAYMAKER, and the two of them break loose of each other -\r\n\r\nON ARMORED COLOSSUS - THAT MOMENT\r\n\r\n- LANDING in the upturned palms of the COLOSSUS! STU watches in\r\ndisbelief as a PANEL pops open in the giant's CHEST, revealing...\r\n\r\n STU\r\n DEATH!!\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n I dress up when I want to make an impression. -\r\n So how'd it go?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Fine, thanks. Saw my girl, said goodbye,\r\n everything's gonna be okay.\r\n (shrugging)\r\n I guess I'm yours now.\r\n\r\n MONKEYBONE\r\n Death, I'd like to point out that none of this\r\n was my fault. The roots of this tragedy go back\r\n to a callous, uncaring society that -\r\n\r\nDEATH lets out a MIGHTY ROAR and CLAPS HIS GREAT METAL HANDS together.\r\nMan and monkey are surely squished. But when DEATH opens his hands, STU\r\nis still there, cupped safely in his palms.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Hey. Where's Monkeybone?\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Back in your head, where he belongs.\r\n (beat)\r\n No offense, Stu, but on your own you're kinda\r\n vanilla. I didn't want to send you back without\r\n him.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Back? You're sending me back?\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n It's irregular, but...I just love that strip of\r\n yours. I figure I'll take the \"Family Circus\"\r\n guy instead.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Death! Thank you!\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Thank me next time you see me.\r\n\r\nHe sends STU ROCKETING UPWARD INTO THE STRATOSPHERE with a single flick\r\nof his finger. Then he turns...\r\n\r\n DEATH\r\n Ohhhh, Hypnos??\r\n\r\nA BUNCH OF FRIGHTENED DARKTOWNERS pitch the quivering satyr out into the\r\nmiddle of the town square.\r\n\r\n HYPNOS\r\n Death! So nice to see you. I can explain -\r\n\r\nHe looks up tremulously. A GIANT SHADOW falls across him...followed by a\r\nGIANT ARMORED FOOT.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - DUSK\r\n\r\nJULIE SOBS in a POLICEMAN's arms at the exit to the zoo.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n I don't know what happened. All I know is...he\r\n was in a coma...and then he came back...and now\r\n he's gone again.\r\n\r\nThey wander out. Behind them, a squad of COPS are confiscating\r\nMONKEYBONE DOLLS from squawling children as they file out.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - PARKING LOT - DUSK\r\n\r\nThe TWO CORPSES, on gurneys, are being loaded into the back of the\r\npolice ambulance. The SURGEON and his team come wandering up.\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n Excuse me. We lost a corpse - we saw him heading\r\n this way...\r\n\r\n DRIVER\r\n I got a couple of fresh ones in the back. Help\r\n yourself.\r\n\r\nThe SURGEON pulls the sheet off CORPSE #1 - aka O.D. STU.\r\n\r\n SURGEON\r\n I'll be. It's him all right. Still dead...\r\n\r\nThe SECOND CORPSE sits up abruptly. His sheet falls away, revealing STU\r\n...the real STU...now back in his own body! The SURGEON and his TEAM run\r\naway from the ambulance SHRIEKING.\r\n\r\nEXT. ZOO - ANOTHER ANGLE - DUSK\r\n\r\nBUSTER barks like a maniac. JULIE turns and sees an IMPOSSIBLE VISION\r\nambling toward her...STU, alive and kicking. She can't believe it's him\r\nuntil he grabs her and pulls her close.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Is it you? Is it really you this time?\r\n\r\nHe pulls her close and kisses her long and hard, quelling all doubts.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n Oh, Stu. Tell me I'm not dreaming.\r\n\r\n STU\r\n Baby...you're asking the wrong guy.\r\n\r\nThey wander off, arm in arm. STU TUGS at the seat of his pants.\r\n\r\n JULIE\r\n What's the matter?\r\n\r\n STU\r\n My tail itches.\r\n\r\nHe DOES A TAKE as he realizes what he's just said - but JULIE smiles,\r\nand he shrugs it off. Johnny Mercer's \"DREAM\" comes up underneath as the\r\nreunited lovers walk off into the moonlight, and we\r\n\r\n FADE OUT.\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n"
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mr. Deeds Goes to Town' ?"
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"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n MR. DEEDS GOES TO TOWN\r\n\r\n screenplay\r\n by Robert Riskin\r\n\r\n\r\n based on a story by\r\n Clarence Budington Kelland\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n Shooting Draft, 1936\r\n Property of\r\n Columbia Pictures\r\n\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n EXTERIOR - MONTAGE 1. QUICK SHOTS OF A CAR SPEEDING AROUND \r\n CURVES IN A MOUNTAINOUS REGION. THE CAR JUMPS A BRIDGE, \r\n HURTLES INTO SPACE, CRASHES IN A FIREBALL. FOLLOWED BY \r\n NEWSBOYS HAWKING SPECIAL EDITIONS, PEOPLE ON STREETCORNERS \r\n BUYING AND READING NEWSPAPERS WITH A SUCCESSION OF BANNER \r\n HEADLINES:\r\n\r\n \"MARTIN W. SEMPLE, FINANCIER, DIES IN ITALY,\"\r\n\r\n \"CIVIC LEADER KILLED IN AUTO ACCIDENT,\"\r\n\r\n \"DISCLOSURE OF BANKER'S WILL AWAITED\" AND FINALLY \"SEMPLE \r\n HEIR AS YET UNKNOWN\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INTERIOR - EDITOR'S OFFICE, DAILY MAIL\r\n\r\n 2. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n of Mac, the editor, at his desk, barking into the telephone.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Say listen, Corny, who do you think \r\n you're talking to? If the Semple \r\n attorneys don't know who the heir \r\n is, who does?\r\n (listens)\r\n Aw, come on Corny, I've done you a \r\n lot of favors. What do you say - \r\n who's getting the Semple dough?\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INTERIOR - CEDAR'S PRIVATE OFFICE\r\n\r\n 3. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Of Cornelius Cobb - a hardened ex-newspaperman, customarily \r\n impatient, grouchy and nervous - victim of the New York \r\n tempo. His friends call him \"Corny.\"\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (on the phone)\r\n You're asking the wrong guy, Mac. \r\n I'm only a press agent.\r\n\r\n THE CAMERA PULLS BACK GRADUALLY TO REVEAL a plush law \r\n office, leather chairs and shelves of books. Arthur Cedar, \r\n attorney, briskly enters scene and seats himself at his \r\n desk. Cedar is in the neighborhood of fifty - grey-templed - \r\n dignified - sharp. Cobb is using the phone on his desk. \r\n Cedar glances at him.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Newspaperman?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (covering mouthpiece - \r\n confidentially)\r\n Wants to know who the heir is.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (firmly)\r\n Hang up.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (returning to the \r\n phone)\r\n Sorry, Mac, I can't. Yeah, Mac. \r\n Sure, but I ain't the attorney—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (more firmly)\r\n Hang up.\r\n\r\n THE CAMERA PULLS BACK FURTHER TO REVEAL another attorney \r\n at one end of the desk, reviewing a pile of papers.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (continuing)\r\n Mr. Cedar is, and I haven't seen \r\n him in two days.\r\n (hangs up the phone)\r\n Listen, Cedar, we've got to do \r\n something about the newspapers.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (barely glancing up)\r\n I'm not interested in the \r\n newspapers.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n But it's a great story. Somewhere \r\n in this country a guy is walking \r\n into twenty million bucks.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes, I know. My first concern is \r\n to locate the lucky man. When I \r\n do, it's your job to keep the \r\n newspapers away from him.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (resignedly)\r\n It's okay with me as long as my \r\n weekly stipend keeps coming in.\r\n\r\n THE CAMERA PULLS BACK TO A FULL SHOT as two men rush in \r\n with a flurry of excitement. One of them is Anderson, an \r\n obsequious employee of Cedar's. With him is another lawyer, \r\n one of the Cedar brothers.\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n We located him, Mr. Cedar! We found \r\n out where he is.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Good!\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n Yes, John, we got him.\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n Here's the report: Longfellow Deeds, \r\n single, 28, lives in Mandrake Falls, \r\n Vermont.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (glancing at the \r\n report)\r\n Thank heaven.\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n Better wire him right away, John.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I'll do no such thing. I'm going \r\n there myself. You're going with me \r\n too, Anderson - and you too, Cobb.\r\n\r\n He pushes a button on the intercom.\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Yes?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Make three reservations on the \r\n first train out to Mandrake Falls, \r\n Vermont.\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n (skeptically)\r\n Where?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mandrake Falls.\r\n (begins to spell as \r\n scene fades)\r\n M-A-N—\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. A STATION\r\n\r\n 4. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n It is a pleasantly rural scene - with just a handful of \r\n local characters scattered about. At one end of the platform - \r\n some mail - newspapers - and a few pieces of freight are \r\n being loaded. Cedar, Cobb and Anderson stand in front of a \r\n welcome sign. The three obviously are out of their element \r\n here - obviously \"City folks.\"\r\n\r\n Over their shoulders. We hear Cobb's voice as he reads:\r\n\r\n COBB'S VOICE\r\n Welcome to Mandrake Falls -Where \r\n the scenery enthralls -Where no \r\n hardship e'er befalls -\r\n Welcome to Mandrake Falls.\r\n\r\n 5. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Cobb and Cedar exchange glances.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n That's pretty.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Are you sure this is the town he \r\n lives in?\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n Yes sir, Mr. Cedar. This is the \r\n town all right.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, I dropped everything at the \r\n office - I hope it's not a wild \r\n goose chase.\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n No, sir. We checked it thoroughly. \r\n He lives here all right.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Ah! I spy a native. Let's ask him.\r\n\r\n CAMERA MOVES WITH THEM as they cross to a small, one-story \r\n old brick building, covered with ivy. This is the ticket \r\n and freight office combined. In front of it is a very old \r\n man, a stoop-shouldered rail agent with a face of a million \r\n wrinkles - puttering around some packages.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (as they approach)\r\n Good morning.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n (glances up)\r\n Morning, neighbors. Morning.\r\n\r\n He picks up a package and disappears into the building. \r\n Cedar and Cobb look at each other.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n That's an excellent start. At least \r\n we've broken the ice.\r\n\r\n The old man returns to his pile of packages.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I say, my friend, do you know a \r\n fellow by the name of Longfellow \r\n Deeds?\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Deeds?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Yes, sir. Yes, indeedy. Everyone \r\n knows Deeds.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes, I—\r\n\r\n He again disappears.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Must be a game he's playing.\r\n\r\n The old man shows up again.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We'd like to get in touch with \r\n him. It's very important.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Who's that?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Deeds! Who do you think I'm talking \r\n about?\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Oh, yes - Deeds. Fine fellow. Very \r\n democratic. You won't have no \r\n trouble at all. Talk to anybody.\r\n\r\n Whereupon the old man carries another package inside. Cobb \r\n is properly exasperated now.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I guess we'd better try somebody \r\n else.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n No, we won't! The next time that \r\n jumping jack comes out, I'll \r\n straddle him while you ask him \r\n your questions.\r\n\r\n The old man emerges from the building and looks up at them \r\n as if he's never seen them before.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Morning, neighbors.\r\n\r\n 6. TWO SHOT - COBB AND AGENT (FEATURING COBB)\r\n\r\n Cobb grabs the old man as he turns to head back into the \r\n building.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Remember us? We're the fellows who \r\n were here a minute ago.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Oh, yes. Yes, indeedy. I never \r\n forget a face.\r\n\r\n He turns again - but Cobb holds him by the arm and sets \r\n him down on a small packing case.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Listen, Pop, we've come all the \r\n way from New York to look up a \r\n fellow by the name of Deeds. It's \r\n important - very important!\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n (releasing his arm)\r\n You don't have to get rough, \r\n neighbor. All you got to do is \r\n ask.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Then please pretend, for just one \r\n fleeting moment, that I'm asking. \r\n Where does he reside?\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Who?\r\n\r\n Cobb turns away in disgust. Anderson steps forward.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE THREE\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n Longfellow Deeds - where does he \r\n live?\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Oh, that's what you want! Well, \r\n why didn't you say so in the first \r\n place instead of beating around \r\n the bush? Those other fellows don't \r\n know what they're talking about.\r\n (as he exits scene)\r\n Come on, I'll take you there in my \r\n car. If they'd only explained to \r\n me what they wanted, there would \r\n be no trouble.\r\n\r\n He leaves Cobb and Cedar staring after him killingly.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S LIVING ROOM\r\n\r\n 8. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n A little old lady, Mrs. Meredith, answers a knock at the \r\n door. Cedar, Cobb and Anderson stand there, with the old \r\n man at their heels. Mrs. Meredith is a sweet, soft-voiced, \r\n timid and fluttery little creature.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Oh, will you come in please, \r\n gentlemen?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Is Mr. Deeds in?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n No - he's over to the park arranging \r\n for the bazaar, so's to raise money \r\n for the fire engine.\r\n (to old man)\r\n Mal, you shoulda knowed he was in \r\n the park.\r\n\r\n AGENT\r\n Knew it all the time. But these \r\n men said they wanted to see the \r\n house.\r\n (mumbling as he \r\n exits)\r\n Can't read their minds if they \r\n don't say what they want.\r\n\r\n 9. GROUP SHOT\r\n\r\n Cobb glares after him exasperatedly. Mrs. Meredith turns \r\n to Cobb and Cedar.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Come in, please. Come in. Can I \r\n get you a cup of tea?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n No, thanks.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Sit down. Sure I couldn't get you \r\n a glass of lemonade or something?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n That's very kind of you. Are you \r\n related to him?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n No, I'm his housekeeper.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, we'd like to find out \r\n something about him. What does he \r\n do for a living?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n He and Jim Mason own the Tallow \r\n Works. But that's not where he \r\n makes his money. He makes most of \r\n it from his poetry.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE THREE\r\n\r\n Featuring Cobb.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (skeptically)\r\n He writes poetry?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Oh, my goodness, yes. Longfellow's \r\n famous. He writes all those things \r\n on postcards. You know, for \r\n Christmas - and Easter - and \r\n birthdays. Sit down, please.\r\n\r\n She reaches over to a desk and picks one up.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Here's one - he got $25 for this \r\n one.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - MRS. MEREDITH\r\n\r\n AS SHE READS - WITH FEELING:\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n \"When you've nowhere to turn - and \r\n you're filled with doubt - Don't \r\n stand in midstream, hesitating,\r\n For you know that your mother's \r\n heart cries out - 'I'm waiting, my \r\n boy, I'm waiting.'\"\r\n (she looks up)\r\n Isn't that beautiful?\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - COBB\r\n\r\n His eyes open unbelievingly.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH'S VOICE\r\n Isn't it a lovely sentiment?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (flatly)\r\n Yeah.\r\n\r\n A dog enters, racing toward the door, scratching at it and \r\n whining.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n (as she heads toward \r\n the door)\r\n Here he is now.\r\n\r\n She opens the door and goes out, with the dog racing ahead.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (to Cedar - sotto \r\n voce)\r\n I suggest you break it to him \r\n gently. He's liable to keel over \r\n from the shock.\r\n\r\n Mrs. Meredith re-appears. We hear her voice as she comes \r\n through the doorway.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n They've been waiting a long while.\r\n\r\n Longfellow Deeds trails behind her.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Who are they?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n I don't know.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (standing - formally)\r\n Mr. Longfellow Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n How do you do.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (shaking hands)\r\n How do you do.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (extending card)\r\n I'm John Cedar - of the New York \r\n firm of Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and \r\n Budington.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n Featuring Cobb. He watches Longfellow who is glancing at \r\n the card.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (reads to himself)\r\n Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and Budington.\r\n (looks up; smiles)\r\n Budington must feel like an awful \r\n stranger, hmm?\r\n\r\n Cobb's eyes pop at the nifty.[1]\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mr. Cornelius Cobb and Mr. Anderson.\r\n\r\n They exchange greetings. Longfellow gestures to chairs.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You gentlemen make yourselves \r\n comfortable.\r\n\r\n COBB AND ANDERSON\r\n Thanks.\r\n\r\n 14. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow crosses to his tuba near a chair. He takes a \r\n mouthpiece out of his pocket.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n New mouthpiece. Been waiting two \r\n weeks for this. Kids keep swiping \r\n them all the time. They use 'em \r\n for bean shooters.\r\n (he blows a note)\r\n What can I do for you gentlemen?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n You gentlemen going to stay for \r\n lunch?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (right to the point; \r\n ignoring her)\r\n I'd like to ask you a few questions.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n All right.\r\n\r\n Longfellow looks at them strangely and sits down beside \r\n his tuba.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mr. Deeds, are you the son of Dr. \r\n Joseph and Mary Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Are your parents living?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Why, no.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mr. Deeds, does the name of Martin \r\n W. Semple mean anything to you?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Not much. He's an uncle of mine, I \r\n think. I never saw him, but my \r\n mother's name was Semple, you know.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, he passed on. He was killed \r\n in a motor accident in Italy.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He was? Gee, that's too bad. If \r\n there's anything I can do to—\r\n\r\n While he speaks, he has been adjusting the tuba between \r\n his legs and now sucks on the mouthpiece, preparatory to \r\n playing.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I have good news for you, sir. Mr. \r\n Semple left a large fortune when \r\n he died. He left it all to you, \r\n Mr. Deeds. Deducting the taxes, it \r\n amounts to something in the \r\n neighborhood of $20,000,000.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n His lips are over the mouthpiece of the tuba. His only \r\n reaction to the startling news is to lift his eyes in \r\n Cedar's direction.\r\n\r\n 16. GROUP SHOT\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n How about lunch? Are the gentlemen \r\n going to stay - or not?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Of course they're going to stay.\r\n (to the gentlemen)\r\n She's got some fresh orange layer \r\n cake. You know, with the thick \r\n stuff on the top?\r\n (to Mrs. Meredith)\r\n Sure, they don't want to go to the \r\n hotel.\r\n\r\n Mrs. Meredith leaves. Cobb and Cedar have watched this by-\r\n play, open-mouthed, and are now even more astounded to see \r\n Longfellow blow into his tuba.\r\n\r\n CLOSER SHOT - THE THREE\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (over the noise of \r\n the tuba)\r\n Perhaps you didn't hear what I \r\n said, Mr. Deeds! The whole Semple \r\n fortune goes to you! $20,000,000!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, yes, I heard you all right. \r\n $20,000,000. That's quite a lot, \r\n isn't it?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Oh, it'll do in a pinch.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (impressed)\r\n Yes, indeed. I wonder why he left \r\n me all that money? I don't need \r\n it.\r\n\r\n He resumes his 'Oom-pahs.'\r\n\r\n 18. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND COBB\r\n\r\n Staring, unbelievingly.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. AN ALCOVE\r\n\r\n 19. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n The three men sit around a table, having lunch. By \r\n Longfellow's side is, as expected, the tuba.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mr. Cobb here is an ex-newspaperman \r\n associated with your uncle for \r\n many years - as a sort of buffer.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Buffer?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Yeah. A glorified doormat.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes. You see, rich people need \r\n someone to keep the crowds away. \r\n The world's full of pests. Then \r\n there's the newspapers to handle. \r\n One must know when to seek publicity - \r\n and when to avoid it.\r\n\r\n During Cedar's speech, Longfellow seems to have been lost \r\n in his own thoughts.\r\n\r\n 20. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND COBB\r\n\r\n Favoring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and Budington. \r\n Funny, I can't think of a rhyme \r\n for Budington.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Why should you?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, whenever I run across a funny \r\n name, I always like to poke around \r\n for a rhyme. Don't you?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Nah.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I've got one for Cobb—\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE GROUP\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n \"There once was a man named Cobb, \r\n Who kept Semple away from the mob. \r\n Came the turn of the tide\r\n And Semple - he died -\r\n And now poor Cobb's out of a job!\"\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Sounds like a two weeks' notice to \r\n me.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Huh?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n I've gotten the 'sackaroo' in many \r\n ways - but never in rhyme.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, I don't mean that. I'm sure \r\n I'm going to need your help.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Oh, that's different if it's just \r\n poetry.\r\n\r\n 22. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As Mrs. Meredith enters with coffee which she pours.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Are you a married man, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Who - me? No.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n No, he's too fussy for that. That's \r\n what's the matter with him. There \r\n are lots of nice girls right here \r\n in Mandrake Falls who're dying to \r\n be married—\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Don't pay any attention to her.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n He's got a lot of foolish notions - \r\n about saving a lady in distress.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now you keep out of this!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (diplomatically)\r\n Saving a lady in distress, eh? \r\n Well, I suppose we all have dreams \r\n like that when we are young.\r\n (rising)\r\n Incidentally, we'd better get \r\n started. You'll have to pack.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What for?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n You're going to New York with us.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n When?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n This afternoon - at four o'clock.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I don't think we've got any \r\n suitcases.\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n Well, we could borrow a couple \r\n from Mrs. Simpson. You know, she \r\n went to Niagara Falls last year.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'm kind of nervous. I've never \r\n been away from Mandrake Falls in \r\n my life. Kind of like to see Grant's \r\n Tomb, though.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (all business)\r\n I can understand that.\r\n (rises to go)\r\n We'll take a walk around town, \r\n meet you at the train at four \r\n o'clock.\r\n (shakes his hand)\r\n Congratulations, Mr. Deeds. You're \r\n one of the richest men in the \r\n country. We'll see you later.\r\n (to Mrs. Meredith)\r\n Goodbye and thank you.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n See you later, kid.\r\n\r\n ANDERSON'S VOICE\r\n (as he too exits)\r\n Good day, sir.\r\n\r\n They exit.\r\n\r\n 23. TWO SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND MRS. MEREDITH\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Hear what he said? You know how \r\n much twenty million is?\r\n\r\n MRS. MEREDITH\r\n I don't care how much it is. You \r\n sit right there and eat your lunch. \r\n You haven't touched a thing.\r\n\r\n Longfellow nibbles at some food, staring into space \r\n thoughtfully.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. STATION\r\n\r\n 24. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n The whole town is out. The band is playing \"He's a Jolly \r\n Good Fellow\" - the crowd sings. It's a festive occasion. A \r\n large, awkwardly painted sign looms over everyone's head. \r\n It reads:\r\n\r\n FAREWELL LONGFELLOW DEEDS THE PRIDE OF MANDRAKE FALLS \r\n\r\n 25. MEDIUM SHOT - CEDAR AND ANDERSON\r\n\r\n They peer anxiously around, looking for someone, when Cobb \r\n dashes in.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (breathlessly)\r\n I can't find him.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n You can't?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n I looked everywhere. I even went \r\n to his house. It's locked up.\r\n\r\n ANDERSON\r\n He probably had a change of heart.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n He wasn't very anxious to come in \r\n the first place.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (looking on)\r\n Here comes the train.\r\n\r\n Cedar glances off.\r\n\r\n LONG SHOT (STOCK)\r\n\r\n Of train approaching.\r\n\r\n 27. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND COBB\r\n\r\n The band has already begun and is now in the midst of \"For \r\n He's A Jolly Good Fellow.\"\r\n\r\n At this moment, as he looks off, a startled expression \r\n comes into Cobb's eyes. He grabs Cedar by the arm - who \r\n glances in the direction he points.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Look!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n What?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n That tuba player!\r\n\r\n MEDIUM SHOT - THE BAND\r\n\r\n With Longfellow, in his customary position, blowing on his \r\n tuba.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 27\r\n\r\n Cedar and Cobb stare, wide-eyed, as the song is finished.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Well, now I've seen everything.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. STATION\r\n\r\n 29. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n In the b.g. is the train with Longfellow standing on the \r\n observation platform, clutching his tuba. On either side \r\n of him is Cedar and Cobb. In the f.g. the crowd yells its \r\n farewell. Several of them stuff baskets of fruit into his \r\n hands. The band plays \"Auld Lang Syne.\"\r\n\r\n 30. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Over Longfellow and Cobb's shoulders. As the train begins \r\n pulling out. Longfellow smiles wanly and waves.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Goodbye, Mrs. Meredith! Goodbye, \r\n Jim! Bye, Buddy! Goodbye, everybody!\r\n (a pause)\r\n Gosh, I've got a lot of friends.\r\n\r\n Cobb looks up into Longfellow's face - affected by the \r\n scene.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. TRAIN DRAWING ROOM\r\n\r\n 31. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow is slumped in his seat, his legs sprawled out, \r\n his eyes ceilingward - in deep thought. Cobb sits across \r\n from him. Cedar enters, hangs up his coat, hat and cane.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (opening a snifter - \r\n generously)\r\n Have a drink?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (distractedly)\r\n No, thanks.\r\n\r\n Cobb and Cedar exchange a look.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Will you have a cigar?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n No, thank you.\r\n\r\n Cedar sits down.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (breaking the silence)\r\n I wouldn't worry if I were you. Of \r\n course, a large fortune like this \r\n entails a great responsibility - \r\n but you'll have a good deal of \r\n help. So don't worry. Leave \r\n everything to me.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, I wasn't worried about that.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n No?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I was wondering where they're going \r\n to get another tuba player for the \r\n band.\r\n\r\n Cobb has just finished taking a drink and can't help but \r\n nearly spit it out.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n 32. LONG SHOT (STOCK)\r\n\r\n The 20th Century crossing the Harlem River.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n ANOTHER STOCK SHOT\r\n\r\n Of the 20th Century going under the street level on Park \r\n Avenue.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT OF OFFICE DOOR\r\n\r\n Upon which we read: \"CEDAR, CEDAR & BUDINGTON - ENTRANCE.\" \r\n CAMERA PULLS BACK to take in Cedar, who opens the door and \r\n walks through.\r\n\r\n INT. GENERAL OFFICE\r\n\r\n CLOSE TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n With Cedar as he strides across the room - in business-\r\n like fashion. He comes to a door marked \"PRIVATE OFFICES.\" \r\n He pushes this door opens and disappears.\r\n\r\n MAN'S VOICE\r\n (as Cedar passes by)\r\n Hello, John. Where have you been?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (as he walks briskly)\r\n I've been fishing.\r\n\r\n In the background is typical office hub-bub.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (to a secretary as \r\n he passes)\r\n Good morning, Celia.\r\n\r\n SECRETARY\r\n Good morning, Mr. Cedar.\r\n\r\n A chorus of \"Good Morning, Mr. Cedar!\" issues from the \r\n clerks. A secretary looks up.\r\n\r\n INT. PRIVATE OFFICES\r\n\r\n CLOSE TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n With Cedar - as he passes through the room - arriving at a \r\n door marked \"JOHN CEDAR, PRIVATE.\" He goes through the \r\n door.\r\n\r\n INT. CEDAR'S PRIVATE OFFICES - ANTEROOM\r\n\r\n 37. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar breezes in and speaks to a secretary.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Good morning. Where are they?\r\n\r\n SECRETARY\r\n Waiting for you in the other office.\r\n\r\n He strides across the room to still another door marked \r\n \"PRIVATE\" and he disappears.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CEDAR'S PRIVATE OFFICE\r\n\r\n 38. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n A group of associates sit around in large leather chairs, \r\n as Cedar barges in.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (beaming)\r\n Good morning. Hello, boys.\r\n\r\n The men come to life. Some rise - others lean forward. Two \r\n of them are brothers of Cedar - tall and athletic. The \r\n third is a small, frightened-looking man. He is Budington.\r\n\r\n MEN\r\n (ad lib)\r\n Hello, John.\r\n\r\n What happened?\r\n\r\n Well, what's he like?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We've got nothing to worry about. \r\n He's as naive as a child.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n John—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Close that door.\r\n (into dictograph)\r\n Will you get Mrs. Cedar on the \r\n phone, please?\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n Come on, John. What happened?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (to associates)\r\n The smartest thing I ever did was \r\n to make that trip.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n (anxiously)\r\n John, did you get the - uh—\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n Favoring Cedar.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (interrupting)\r\n No, Budington, I didn't get the \r\n Power of Attorney. But don't worry, \r\n I will.\r\n (beaming to his \r\n brothers)\r\n I asked him last night what he was \r\n going to do with the money, and \r\n what do you suppose he said?\r\n\r\n THE TWO BROTHERS\r\n (gathering around \r\n him)\r\n What? I can't imagine.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n He said he guessed he'd give it \r\n away.\r\n\r\n THE TWO BROTHERS\r\n (laughing)\r\n Give it away!? The boy must be a \r\n nit-wit!\r\n\r\n Budington hasn't enjoyed the joke - his mind still on their \r\n problem.\r\n\r\n ONE OF THE BROTHERS\r\n Well, John, you had the right hunch!\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n John, if you don't mind my saying \r\n so - we can't afford to—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (irascibly)\r\n I know, Budington. We can't afford \r\n to have the books investigated \r\n right now. You must have said that \r\n a thousand times already.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n But what if they fall into somebody \r\n else's hands, why - uh—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, it hasn't happened yet - has \r\n it?\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n (wailing)\r\n But a half million dollars! My \r\n goodness, where are we going to \r\n get—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (exploding)\r\n Will you stop worrying! It was I \r\n who got old man Semple to turn \r\n everything over to us, wasn't it? \r\n And who got the Power of Attorney \r\n from him ! All right, and I'll get \r\n it again!\r\n (pause - change of \r\n tone)\r\n I'll take it easy. Those books'll \r\n never leave this office.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. AN APARTMENT\r\n\r\n 40. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n George Semple, a ne'er-do-well, prominent for the pouches \r\n under his eyes and a perpetual nose-twitch, is sprawled \r\n out in a chair reading a newspaper. A nagging wife walks \r\n around him.\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n A yokel! Nothing but a yokel! \r\n Your uncle must have been mad to \r\n leave all that money to him! You're \r\n as closely related to him as he \r\n is, and what did you get?\r\n\r\n She storms around the room. George merely twitches his \r\n nose but says nothing.\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n (slaps the paper \r\n George is reading)\r\n I say, what did you get?\r\n\r\n GEORGE\r\n Stop yelling. Can I help it if my \r\n uncle didn't like me?\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n I told you to be nice to him. Ten \r\n years we've been waiting for that \r\n old man to kick off. And then we \r\n were going to be on Easy Street. \r\n Yeah - on Easy Street!\r\n\r\n GEORGE\r\n Oh, shut up! It's too late now, \r\n and you're a nuisance!\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n That's just what I'm going to be - \r\n a nuisance. I'm going to be a \r\n nuisance until I get hold of some \r\n of that money!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. EDITOR'S OFFICE, DAILY MAIL\r\n\r\n 41. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n The editor stands in front of his desk. Four of five \r\n reporters in front of him - several photographers. In the \r\n b.g., leaning against the wall near the door, apparently \r\n indifferent, is Babe Bennett. The editor, Mac, is haranguing \r\n them.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (as he blows his \r\n nose)\r\n He's news! Every time he blows \r\n his nose, it's news. A corn-fed \r\n bohunk like that falling into the \r\n Semple fortune is hot copy . . . \r\n But it's got to be personal. It's \r\n got to have an angle. What does he \r\n think about? How does it feel to \r\n be a millionaire! Is he going to \r\n get married! What does he think \r\n of New York! Is he smart? Is he \r\n dumb? . . . A million angles!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n She has a string in her hand which she keeps flicking, \r\n trying to get a knot into it - in the manner of cowboys \r\n with a rope. Mac's voice continues over scene:\r\n\r\n 43. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Of them all, as Mac continues:\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n He's been here three days, and \r\n what have you numbskulls brought \r\n in! Any halfwit novice could have \r\n done better!\r\n\r\n REPORTER'S VOICE\r\n Yeah, we tried too—\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Am I talking too loud? Or annoying \r\n anybody?\r\n\r\n REPORTER\r\n You know Corny Cobb. He's keeping \r\n him under lock and key.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Cobb, Cobb! Never mind about Cobb. \r\n Use what little brains you've got! \r\n Find out something yourselves, you \r\n imbecilic stupes! Now get out of \r\n here before I really tell you what \r\n I think of you. Come on, get out!\r\n\r\n They scramble to their feet. One of the reporters mumbles \r\n something as he passes Mac on the way to the door.\r\n\r\n REPORTER\r\n (Mumbles.)\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (alert)\r\n What was that?\r\n\r\n REPORTER\r\n (thinking fast - \r\n covering up)\r\n Huh? I said you had dirty plaster.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT AT DOOR\r\n\r\n As Babe is still flicking her string, trying to get a knot. \r\n The reporters file past her on their way out. Just as the \r\n last one is approaching, she succeeds in doing the trick.\r\n\r\n 45. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n As Mac turns to Babe.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n You too! Thought I could depend on \r\n you, but you're getting as bad as \r\n the rest of them.\r\n\r\n He grabs up a handful of papers and starts out.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (flicking the string)\r\n Look, I can do it!\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n What's gotten into you, Babe? I \r\n remember the time when you'd blast \r\n this town wide open before you'd \r\n let Cobb get away with a thing \r\n like this.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, he's not getting away with \r\n anything.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (excited)\r\n Listen, Babe - get me some stuff \r\n on this guy, and you can have—\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Can I have a month's vacation?\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n With pay!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n With pay!\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (casually, as she \r\n starts away)\r\n Leave four columns open on the \r\n front page tomorrow.\r\n\r\n 47. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n As Babe crosses to door.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Now you're talking, Babe. I'll \r\n keep the whole front page open. \r\n What are you going to do?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (at door)\r\n Have lunch.\r\n\r\n She exits. Mac's face lights up happily.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. RESIDENCE\r\n\r\n 48. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n Of a large, imposing-looking residence.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 49. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow stands awkwardly between two tailors - who chalk \r\n and pin a suit on him. After a few seconds of silence:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n It's the first time I ever had a \r\n suit made on purpose.\r\n\r\n The tailors smile accommodatingly as CAMERA PULLS BACK and \r\n we discover that both Cedar and Cobb are present. Cobb is \r\n slumped in a chair, and Cedar is carefully putting some \r\n papers away in a portfolio.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n It's merely a suggestion. I don't \r\n wish to press the point, Mr. Deeds, \r\n but if you'll give me your Power \r\n of Attorney we'll take care of \r\n everything. It'll save you a lot \r\n of petty annoyances. Every shark \r\n in town will be trying to sell you \r\n something.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, yes, there've been a lot of \r\n them around here already. Strangest \r\n kind of people. Salesmen - \r\n politicians - moochers - all want \r\n something. I haven't had a minute \r\n to myself. Haven't seen Grant's \r\n Tomb yet.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, you see, your uncle didn't \r\n bother with that sort of thing. He \r\n left everything to us. He traveled \r\n most of the time, and enjoyed \r\n himself. You should do the same \r\n thing, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Besides wanting to be my lawyer, \r\n you also want to handle my \r\n investments too?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes. That is to say—\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, outside of your regular fee, \r\n how much extra will it cost?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (too quickly)\r\n Oh - nothing. No extra charge.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That involves a lot of extra work, \r\n doesn't it?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (generously)\r\n Yes, but that's an added service a \r\n firm like Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and \r\n Budington usually donates.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Budington. Funny, I can't think of \r\n a rhyme for Budington yet.\r\n\r\n 50. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As a butler stands in the doorway.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n The gentlemen from the opera are \r\n still waiting in the board room, \r\n sir. They're getting a trifle \r\n impatient, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n They are? I forgot all about them.\r\n (to Cobb)\r\n What do you think they want?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, your uncle was Chairman of \r\n the Board of Directors. They \r\n probably expect you to carry on.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (rising)\r\n I'll tell those mugs to keep their \r\n shirts on, that you'll be right \r\n down.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Thanks\r\n (suddenly)\r\n Oh, did you send that telegram to \r\n Jim Mason?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Jim Mason? Oh, yeah. Yeah. No, I \r\n didn't send it. I've got it written \r\n out, though. Here it is.\r\n (reaches into his \r\n pocket and reads)\r\n \"Arthur's been with the Tallow \r\n Works too long. STOP. Don't think \r\n we should fire him. Longfellow.\"\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Fine. Send it right away. I don't \r\n want him to fire Arthur.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Oh, sure. Sure. We don't want to \r\n fire Arthur.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He was the last baby my father \r\n delivered, Arthur was.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I think you ought to give this \r\n matter some thought, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Huh?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I mean, about the Power of Attorney.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, yes. Yes, I will.\r\n\r\n Cobb has stalled long enough to hear Longfellow's decision \r\n before he goes out of the room.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'll give it a lot of thought. \r\n There was a fellow named Winslow \r\n here a little while ago, wanted to \r\n handle my affairs for nothing too. \r\n It puzzles me why these people all \r\n want to work for nothing. It isn't \r\n natural. So I guess I'd better \r\n think about it some more.\r\n\r\n 51. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow, Cedar and the two tailors.\r\n\r\n TAILOR\r\n That's that.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You go to an awful lot of work to \r\n keep a fellow warm, don't you?\r\n\r\n TAILOR\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n A butler enters again.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n A Mr. Hallor to see you sir.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (quickly)\r\n Did you say Hallor?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Well, don't let him in.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Why not? Who is he?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n A lawyer representing some woman \r\n with a claim against the estate.\r\n (to butler)\r\n Tell him to see me at my office.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, if he has a claim, we'd better \r\n see him.\r\n (to butler)\r\n Send him in.\r\n\r\n The butler disappears.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n He's capable of causing you a lot \r\n of trouble, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n How can he make any trouble for \r\n me? I haven't done anything.\r\n\r\n The butler reappears, followed by Hallor. The minute he \r\n appears, Cedar speaks up belligerently.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I thought I told you to take up \r\n this matter with me, Hallor.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE GROUP SHOT\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n I'm a little tired of being pushed \r\n around by you, Mr. Cedar - I don't \r\n care how important you are.\r\n (to Longfellow)\r\n Mr. Deeds, I represent Mrs. Semple.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (eyebrows raised)\r\n Mrs. Semple?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Yes. Your uncle's common-law wife. \r\n She has a legal claim on the estate.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We'll let the courts decide what \r\n her legal position is.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n You wouldn't dare go into court \r\n with a case like this - and you \r\n know it!\r\n\r\n He turns to Longfellow, who has listened to them studyingly.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n I leave it to you, Mr. Deeds. Can \r\n you conceive of any court not being \r\n in sympathy with any woman who \r\n gave up the best years of her life \r\n for an old man like your uncle?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What kind of wife did you say she \r\n was?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Common-law wife. On top of that, \r\n there's a child.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n A child? My uncle's?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's awful. The poor woman should \r\n be taken care of immediately.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n (pleased)\r\n I'm glad to see you're willing to \r\n be reasonable, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n If she was his wife, she should \r\n have all the money. That's only \r\n fair. I don't want a penny of it.\r\n\r\n He yanks his trousers off and hands them to the tailor.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Don't make any rash promises—\r\n\r\n As the tailors exit, Cobb returns.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n You'd better get right down there. \r\n That opera mob is about to break \r\n into the Mad Song from \"Lucia.\"[2]\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Hallor)\r\n Oh, I don't want to keep them \r\n waiting any longer. They're \r\n important people.\r\n (to Cobb)\r\n I wish you'd go along with me, \r\n Cobb. They're all strangers to me.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Well, what about it, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (getting into robe - \r\n to Hallor)\r\n You'll excuse me, won't you? I'll \r\n be right back.\r\n\r\n He exits with Cobb.\r\n\r\n INT. CORRIDOR\r\n\r\n MED. TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n As Longfellow and Cobb come out and start down corridor.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Gee, I'm busy. Did the opera people \r\n always come here for their meetings?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's funny. Why is that?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (wisely)\r\n Why do mice go where there's \r\n cheese?[3]\r\n\r\n INT. BOARD ROOM\r\n\r\n 54. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n A group of eight distinguished-looking men sit around a \r\n long table, awaiting Longfellow's arrival. At the head of \r\n the table is a Mr. Douglas.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n From what I'm led to believe, the \r\n young man's quite childish. I don't \r\n think we'll have any difficulty in \r\n getting him to put up the entire \r\n amount. After all, it's only a \r\n matter of $180,000.\r\n\r\n CHORUS OF VOICES\r\n A drop in the bucket for him.\r\n\r\n An excellent idea!\r\n\r\n Why not? . . .\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n (slyly)\r\n You know, gentlemen, we're really \r\n very fortunate the young man is so \r\n sympathetic toward music.\r\n (winking)\r\n He plays the tuba in the town band.\r\n\r\n MAN\r\n (who has been \r\n watching at door)\r\n Here he comes.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Good.\r\n\r\n There is a shuffle of preparation.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. DIRECTOR'S ROOM\r\n\r\n 55. SAME SCENE\r\n\r\n With Longfellow and Cobb present. Longfellow looks around, \r\n completely awed.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Now, gentlemen, the first order of \r\n business will be the election of a \r\n new Chairman of the Board.\r\n\r\n A MAN\r\n (rising)\r\n As a sentimental gesture toward \r\n the best friend opera ever had, \r\n the late Mr. Semple, I think it \r\n only fitting that his nephew, Mr. \r\n Longfellow Deeds, should be made \r\n our next Chairman. I therefore \r\n nominate him.\r\n\r\n A VOICE\r\n Second.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n All those in favor . . .\r\n\r\n EVERYBODY\r\n Aye.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Carried.\r\n (rises)\r\n My congratulations, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n 56. CLOSER SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (self-consciously)\r\n I'm Chairman?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n (humoring a child)\r\n Oh Yes, of course - you've just \r\n been elected.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Cobb)\r\n I'm Chairman.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (dryly)\r\n Happy voyage.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Right here, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n 57. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As Longfellow is led to the president's chair. Douglas \r\n sits next to him.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Now, the next order of business is \r\n the reading of the Secretary's \r\n minutes . . .\r\n\r\n A VOICE\r\n Move we dispense with it.\r\n\r\n ANOTHER VOICE\r\n Second.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n All in favor?\r\n\r\n CHORUS OF VOICES\r\n Aye!\r\n\r\n Longfellow looks his surprise.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n I think they can be dispensed with. \r\n We're ready now for the reading of \r\n the Treasurer's report.\r\n\r\n A VOICE\r\n Move we dispense with it.\r\n\r\n ANOTHER VOICE\r\n Second.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n All in favor?\r\n\r\n CHORUS OF VOICES\r\n Aye!\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Quite right! Now, gentlemen, the \r\n next business will be—\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring Longfellow, as he interrupts:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Wait a minute. What does the \r\n Chairman do?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Why, the Chairman presides at the \r\n meetings.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's what I thought. If you don't \r\n mind, I'm rather interested in the \r\n Treasurer's report. I'd like to \r\n hear it.\r\n\r\n There is an uncomfortable shuffle. For a few minutes, no \r\n one speaks. From the rear, a tall man rises.\r\n\r\n 59. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring treasurer.\r\n\r\n TREASURER\r\n The treasurer reports a deficit of \r\n $180,000 for the current year.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He is stunned.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n A deficit! You mean we've lost \r\n that much?\r\n\r\n 61. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n To include all at table.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n You see, Mr. Deeds, the opera is \r\n not conducted for profit.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n It isn't? What is it conducted \r\n for?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Why, it's an artistic institution—\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n We own an opera house, don't we?\r\n\r\n A VOICE\r\n We do.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n And we give shows?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n We provide opera.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n But you charge. I mean, you sell \r\n tickets?\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Of course.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n And it doesn't pay?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n That's impossible. The opera has \r\n never paid.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (conclusively)\r\n Well, then, we must give the wrong \r\n kind of shows.\r\n\r\n Cobb smiles. The directors are stumped.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring Douglas and Longfellow.\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n The wrong kind! There isn't any \r\n wrong or right kind. Opera is opera!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I guess it is. But I personally \r\n wouldn't care to be head of a \r\n business that kept losing money. \r\n That wouldn't be common sense. \r\n Incidentally, where is the $180,000 \r\n coming from?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Well, we were rather expecting it \r\n to come from you.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Me?!\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Naturally.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Excuse me, gentlemen, there's \r\n nothing natural about that .\r\n\r\n He is suddenly startled. His ears prick up.\r\n\r\n SHOT OF DIRECTORS\r\n\r\n They all stare at Longfellow. Over scene comes the low \r\n wailing cry of a siren, which increases in volume as it \r\n gets closer to the building.\r\n\r\n 64. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow jumps up.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Hey, a fire engine!\r\n\r\n He rushes to the window and peers out. The others stare \r\n unbelievably. The shriek of the siren finally dies down. \r\n Longfellow turns back.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (admiringly)\r\n Gee, that was a pip![4]\r\n (as he goes back to \r\n his seat)\r\n We expect we're going to have one \r\n like that in Mandrake Falls pretty \r\n soon – with a siren, too.\r\n\r\n There is a pause while he gets seated.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now, where were we?\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT AT TABLE\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n You see, Mr. Deeds, the opera is \r\n not conducted like any ordinary \r\n business.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Why not?\r\n\r\n DOUGLAS\r\n Because it just isn't a business, \r\n that's all!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, maybe it isn't to you, but \r\n it certainly is a business to me, \r\n if I have to make up a loss of \r\n $180,000. If it's losing that much \r\n money, there must be something \r\n wrong. Maybe you charge too much. \r\n Maybe you're selling bad \r\n merchandise. Maybe lots of things. \r\n I don't know. You see, I expect to \r\n do a lot of good with that money. \r\n And I can't afford to put it into \r\n anything that I don't look into. \r\n That's my decision for the time \r\n being, gentlemen. Goodbye, and \r\n thank you for making me Chairman.\r\n\r\n 66. MED. SHOT - DIFFERENT ANGLE\r\n\r\n He exits, followed by Cobb, whose eyes shriek his \r\n admiration. The directors watch them leave, flabbergasted. \r\n Cobb's head reappears in doorway.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Gentlemen, you'll find the smelling \r\n salts in the medicine chest.\r\n\r\n He disappears. The Board of Directors stare in dumb \r\n stupefaction at the door.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 67. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n As Longfellow enters. Hallor and Cedar rise.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sorry to keep you waiting so long. \r\n Those opera people are funny. They \r\n wanted me to put up $180,000.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n What about it, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Why, I turned them down, naturally.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n No, I mean - about my client.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh - we'll have to do something \r\n about the common wife.\r\n\r\n Longfellow's valet, Walter, enters and holds up a full \r\n dress suit.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Tails tonight, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What - tails?\r\n (turns and sees it)\r\n Why, that's a monkey suit![5] Do \r\n you want people to laugh at me? I \r\n never wore one of those things in \r\n my life.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n The tailors are leaving.\r\n\r\n TAILOR\r\n (shaking hands with \r\n Longfellow)\r\n Goodbye, and thank you sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Goodbye.\r\n (turning to the \r\n others)\r\n Wants me to wear a monkey suit.\r\n\r\n Cedar and Hallor smile accommodatingly. Walter hands him a \r\n pair of trousers.\r\n\r\n CLOSER SHOT OF GROUP\r\n\r\n As Longfellow starts getting into the trousers.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Of course, we don't want to appear \r\n greedy, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Huh?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n I say we don't want to appear \r\n greedy.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh. That.\r\n\r\n Walter has gotten down on his knees and holds the ends of \r\n the pants.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What do you think you're doing?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Why, I'm assisting you, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Get up from there. I don't want \r\n anybody holding the ends of my \r\n pants. Get up from there!\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (rising)\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to others)\r\n Imagine that - holding the ends of \r\n my pants!\r\n\r\n Hallor smiles feebly - his impatience growing.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Mrs. Semple is entitled by law to \r\n one-third of the estate.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Walter)\r\n And don't ever get down on your \r\n knees again, understand?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n No, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Hallor)\r\n Excuse me. What did you say?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Mrs. Semple is entitled to one-\r\n third of the estate.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n One-third? That's about $7,000,000 \r\n isn't it?\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n (quietly)\r\n Well, we didn't expect that much. \r\n I'm sure I can get her to settle \r\n quietly for one million.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n If there's any talk of settlement, \r\n Hallor, take it up with me at the \r\n office.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n I'll do no such thing—\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's right. Don't you go to his \r\n office. There's only one place \r\n you're going, and that's out the \r\n door.\r\n\r\n Hallor looks up, surprised.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n You're making a mistake, Mr. Deeds.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh no, I'm not. I don't like your \r\n face. Besides, there's something \r\n fishy about a person who would \r\n settle for a million dollars when \r\n they can get seven million. I'm \r\n surprised that Mr. Cedar, who's \r\n supposed to be a smart man, couldn't \r\n see through that.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n Now wait a minute, buddy—\r\n\r\n 69. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow crosses to bell cord and pulls it.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n There's one nice thing about being \r\n rich - you ring a bell and things \r\n happen. When the servant comes in, \r\n Mr. Hallor, I'm going to ask him \r\n to show you to the door. Many people \r\n don't know where it is.\r\n\r\n HALLOR\r\n No use in getting tough. That'll \r\n get you nowhere, Mr. Deeds.\r\n (strongly)\r\n You know, we've got letters.\r\n\r\n As a butler enters, Longfellow turns to him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Will you show Mr. Hallor to the \r\n front door?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT DOOR\r\n\r\n As Hallor gets to it. Longfellow grabs him by the shirt \r\n front and half lifts him off the floor.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n And listen, there isn't any wife - \r\n there aren't any letters - and I \r\n think you're a crook. So you better \r\n watch your step.\r\n\r\n He shoves Hallor violently and he stumbles out of scene. \r\n Cobb enters to Longfellow, his hand extended.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n I can't hold out on you any longer. \r\n Lamb bites wolf.\r\n (shakes his head)\r\n Beautiful.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Only common sense.\r\n\r\n 71. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar has been most uncomfortable through the scene, but \r\n now suavely assumes an admiring attitude.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (a forced smile)\r\n I can't hold out any longer either, \r\n Mr. Deeds.\r\n (holds out his hand)\r\n Being an attorney for you will be \r\n a very simple affair.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You're not my attorney yet, Mr. \r\n Cedar. Not till I find out what's \r\n on your mind. Suppose you get the \r\n books straightened out quick so I \r\n can have a look at them.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes, of course, if you wish. But \r\n you must be prepared. This sort of \r\n thing will be daily routine.\r\n (picks up his hat)\r\n If it becomes annoying, you let me \r\n know. Goodbye, Mr. Deeds. Goodbye, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n Longfellow shakes his hand. Cedar exits. Longfellow stares \r\n after him disgustedly, wiping his hands with his \r\n handkerchief.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Even his hands are oily.\r\n\r\n Walter has entered and holds up a coat for Longfellow.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Well, how about tonight? What would \r\n you like in the way of \r\n entertainment?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Entertainment?\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Your uncle had a weakness for dark \r\n ones, tall and stately. How would \r\n you like yours? Dark or fair, tall \r\n or short, fat or thin, tough or \r\n tender?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What're you talking about?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Women! Ever heard of 'em?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Name your poison and I'll supply \r\n it.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Some other time, Cobb. Some other \r\n time.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Okay, you're the boss.\r\n (as he goes)\r\n When your blood begins to boil, \r\n yell out. I'll be seeing you!\r\n\r\n 73. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n As Cobb exits. Longfellow turns to Walter, the valet.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He talks about women as if they \r\n were cattle.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Every man to his taste, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Tell me, Walter, are all those \r\n stories I hear about my uncle true?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Well, sir, he sometimes had as \r\n many as twenty in the house at the \r\n same time.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Twenty! What did he do with them?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n That was something I was never \r\n able to find out, sir.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. CORRIDOR\r\n\r\n 74. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow, exiting his bedroom, wearing a coat and hat. \r\n He comes to the top of a grand staircase, looks around \r\n slyly and sees that no one is watching. He slides down the \r\n bannister and touches the statue at the bottom for good \r\n luck.\r\n\r\n He starts for the door. When he gets there he finds his \r\n way barred by two husky-looking mugs. He looks up surprised.\r\n\r\n FIRST BODYGUARD\r\n Hey, you going out?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Why yes. Isn't that all right?\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n No. Don't ever want to go out \r\n without telling us.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Who are you?\r\n\r\n BODYGUARDS\r\n We're your bodyguards.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, yeah.\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n Yeah, Mr. Cobb said stick to your \r\n tail no matter what.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's very nice of Mr. Cobb - but \r\n I don't want anybody sticking to \r\n my tail no matter what.\r\n\r\n FIRST BODYGUARD\r\n Sorry, mister. Orders is orders.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Is that so?\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n Yes, sir. We gotta get you up in \r\n the morning - and we gotta put you \r\n to bed at night.\r\n\r\n FIRST BODYGUARD\r\n Only it's all right. No matter \r\n what we see - we don't see nuttin', \r\n see?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (smiling)\r\n That's going to be fun.\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n Some people like it.\r\n\r\n Longfellow glances around the room thoughtfully, then \r\n continues:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Uh, will you do something for me \r\n before we go out?\r\n\r\n FIRST BODYGUARD\r\n Sure!\r\n\r\n The first bodyguard eagerly takes out a pistol. The second \r\n bodyguard slaps it away.\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n (to first bodyguard)\r\n Put that away, slug!\r\n (to Longfellow)\r\n At your service!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I got a trunk in that room. Will \r\n you get it out for me?\r\n\r\n 2ND BODYGUARD\r\n Certainly.\r\n\r\n FIRST BODYGUARD\r\n With pleasure.\r\n\r\n The two bodyguards accommodatingly enter a closet. The \r\n moment they are gone, Longfellow closes the door calmly \r\n and turns the key.\r\n\r\n BODYGUARDS\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Hey, hey! We're your bodyguards. \r\n You can't do this!\r\n\r\n Longfellow whistles as he exits.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. FRONT OF HOUSE\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow comes out, glances over the horizon. The air is \r\n filled with a slight drizzle and he sighs happily.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. TAXI CAB\r\n\r\n 76. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe and two photographers, Bob and Frank, are huddled \r\n conspiratorially in the back seat of a taxi cab.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (pointing)\r\n There he is. Yep, that's him.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n That's who?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Get the cameras ready and follow \r\n me.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n What are you going to do?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Never mind. Follow me and grab \r\n whatever you can get.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n I suppose it's going to be the \r\n same old thing.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n I tell you that dame's nuts.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Right.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. FRONT OF HOUSE\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow is exiting front gate.\r\n\r\n 78. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n From his angle. Out of the shadows a girl comes into view \r\n and staggers forward. She reaches a tree and clutches it \r\n weakly. Then her strength failing, she crumples to the \r\n ground.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow's eyes widen in apprehension as he starts forward - \r\n CAMERA FOLLOWING HIM. He reaches the girl and bending down, \r\n lifts her head. We see it is Babe Bennett. Her eyes are \r\n closed, apparently in a dead faint.\r\n\r\n 80. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE - LOW ANGLE\r\n\r\n Longfellow studies her face for a moment, then starts to \r\n lift her. As he does so, her eyes open and she looks up at \r\n him, feigning bewilderment.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You fainted.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (feebly)\r\n Oh, did I? I'm sorry . . .\r\n\r\n She struggles to get to her feet.\r\n\r\n 81. WIDER ANGLE\r\n Longfellow tries to assist her.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Can I help you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No, thank you. I'll be all right.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Look, this is my house. I'd like \r\n to—\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, no, really - I'll be all right.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What happened?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Well, I guess I walked too much. \r\n I've been looking for a job all \r\n day. I found one, too. I start \r\n tomorrow.\r\n (backing away)\r\n You've been awfully kind. Thank \r\n you very much.\r\n\r\n As she leaves him, Longfellow watches her, full of sympathy. \r\n She takes a few steps and, again feigning weakness, falls \r\n against the iron fence, clutching it. Longfellow rushes to \r\n her assistance.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (looking around)\r\n Hey, taxi!\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. TAXI CAB\r\n\r\n 83. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n (to driver)\r\n Hey, stupe! Follow that cab they \r\n just got into, will you? Hurry up! \r\n Step on it!\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Come on, come on!\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Hurry up!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INSERT: AN ELECTRIC SIGN:\r\n\r\n \"TULLIO'S — EAT WITH THE LITERATI\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. TULLIO'S\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n A corner table, surrounded by ferns, at which Longfellow \r\n and Babe sit. She's still eating.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Feel better now?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Mmm, it tastes so good. Mr. Deeds, \r\n I don't know how I can ever thank \r\n you.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Tell me more about yourself.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Well, I guess I've told you almost \r\n everything there is to tell. My \r\n folks live in a small town near \r\n Hartford. I'm down here alone trying \r\n to make a living.\r\n (hanging her head)\r\n Oh, I'm really just a nobody.\r\n\r\n Longfellow spots a strolling violinist. He furtively beckons \r\n the fellow over. The musician leans into them with romantic \r\n strains.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (as the musician \r\n finishes and strolls \r\n away)\r\n Oh, that was so lovely. Thank you.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You were a lady in distress, weren't \r\n you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (looks up)\r\n What?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh - uh - nothing.\r\n\r\n 85. WIDER ANGLE\r\n As a waiter enters the scene and \r\n begins removing dishes.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Waiter! Has anybody come in yet?\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Huh? On, no. Nobody important.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Be sure and point 'em out to me, \r\n won't you?\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'm a writer myself, you know.\r\n\r\n The waiter throws Longfellow a sidelong glance of complete \r\n boredom.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I write poetry.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n He exits.\r\n\r\n 86. CLOSE TWO SHOT - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You've been having quite an exciting \r\n time here, haven't you? All those \r\n meetings and business deals and \r\n society people - haven't you been \r\n having fun?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n No. That is, I didn't—\r\n (pause - while he \r\n looks at her)\r\n Until I met you. I like talking to \r\n you, though—\r\n (moodily)\r\n Imagine my finding you right on my \r\n doorstep.\r\n\r\n 87. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n The waiter enters again.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Brookfield just came in.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, the poet? Where?\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Over at that big round table. The \r\n one that looks like a poodle.\r\n\r\n Longfellow stares off scene - his eyes full of worship.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Babe)\r\n Look - there's Brookfield, the \r\n poet.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (looks also)\r\n Really?\r\n\r\n 88. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n From their angle, to show people at a table, engaged in \r\n conversation.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n At Longfellow's table. He stares off at them, awed. Babe \r\n watches his face.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - AUTHOR'S TABLE\r\n\r\n A group of five men, drinking - as the waiter enters.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n (confidentially - \r\n indicating \r\n Longfellow)\r\n Pardon. Longfellow Deeds, who just \r\n inherited the Semple fortune, wants \r\n to meet you.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n Oh, yes. I read about him. He writes \r\n poetry on postcards.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Let's invite him over. Might get a \r\n couple of laughs. Getting rather \r\n dull around here.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n It's always dull here.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n (rising)\r\n I'll get him.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Good.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - ROUND TABLE\r\n\r\n At which they are all seated now. Babe sits next to \r\n Longfellow, who is the center of attraction. Brookfield is \r\n just finishing introductions.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n Henaberry, Mr. Morrow, Bill - this \r\n is Mr. Deeds and his fiancée from \r\n Mandrake Falls.\r\n\r\n THE GROUP\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n How do!\r\n Hello!\r\n Nice to meet you!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Nice of you to ask us to come and \r\n sit with you. Back home we never \r\n get a chance to meet famous people.\r\n\r\n BILL\r\n (calling waiter)\r\n Waiter! A little service here.\r\n\r\n THE GROUP\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Yes!\r\n Mr. Deeds is a distinguished poet.\r\n A drink for Mr. Deeds!\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n He's a poet. Have a drink.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n No - I don't want it, thank you.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Why, you must drink! All poets \r\n drink!\r\n\r\n 92. MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE GROUP\r\n\r\n BILL\r\n Tell us, Mr. Deeds. How do you go \r\n about writing your poems? We \r\n craftsmen are very interested in \r\n one another's methods.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Yes. Do you have to wait for an \r\n inspiration, or do you just dash \r\n it off?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (self-consciously)\r\n Well, I don't know. I—\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Mr. Morrow, over there, for \r\n instance, just dashes them off.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Yes. That's what my publishers \r\n have been complaining about.\r\n\r\n They all laugh superficially.\r\n\r\n 93. CLOSE SHOT GROUP - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n Babe glances up at Longfellow, to see if he's aware that \r\n he is being laughed at. But he apparently isn't.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (laughing feebly)\r\n Your readers don't complain, Mr. \r\n Morrow.\r\n\r\n MORROW'S VOICE\r\n Oh, thanks. Thanks.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n How about you, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, I write mine on order. The \r\n people I work for just tell me \r\n what they want and then I go to \r\n work and write it.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n Amazing! Why, that's true genius!\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Yes. Have you any peculiar \r\n characteristics when you are \r\n creating?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, I play the tuba.\r\n\r\n They all laugh.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n I've been playing the harmonica \r\n for forty years - didn't do me a \r\n bit of good.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n You wouldn't have one in your \r\n pocket, would you, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (smiling)\r\n What? A tuba?\r\n\r\n They all laugh.\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n No, a postcard - with one of your \r\n poems on it.\r\n\r\n Longfellow is beginning to sense he is being kidded.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (his face sober)\r\n No.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n You mean to tell me you don't carry \r\n a pocketful around with you?\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n Too bad! I was hoping you'd \r\n autograph one for me.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n I was too.\r\n\r\n BILL\r\n Quite right.\r\n\r\n MED. GROUP SHOT\r\n\r\n As they keep on. Longfellow has his eyes levelled on each \r\n speaker in turn, obviously cognizant of their ill-concealed \r\n jibes.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Wait a minute, boys. Perhaps Mr. \r\n Deeds would recite one for us.\r\n\r\n THE OTHER'S VOICES\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Yes!\r\n\r\n BROOKFIELD\r\n That's a very good idea. Nothing \r\n like a poet reciting his own stuff.\r\n\r\n ONE OF THE OTHERS\r\n How about a Mother's Day poem, Mr. \r\n Deeds?\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Exactly! Give us one that wrings \r\n the great American heart.\r\n\r\n THE GROUP\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n Babe has been watching Longfellow, interested. Now, when \r\n their voices die down - and they wait expectantly - he \r\n speaks quietly.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (deeply hurt)\r\n I guess I get the idea. I guess I \r\n know why I was invited here. To \r\n make fun of me.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n SEVERAL VOICES\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Oh, come now.\r\n I wouldn't say that.\r\n\r\n HENABERRY\r\n Look, he's temperamental.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (levelling off at \r\n him)\r\n Yeah, what if I am? What about it?\r\n\r\n Henaberry's face sobers.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (simply)\r\n It's easy to make fun of somebody \r\n if you don't care how much you \r\n hurt 'em.\r\n (to Brookfield)\r\n I think your poems are swell, Mr. \r\n Brookfield, but I'm disappointed \r\n in you. I know I must look funny \r\n to you, but maybe if you went to \r\n Mandrake Falls you'd look just as \r\n funny to us . Only nobody would \r\n laugh at you and make you feel \r\n ridiculous - 'cause that wouldn't \r\n be good manners.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n AS HE RISES, CONTINUING:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I guess maybe it is comical to \r\n write poems for postcards, but a \r\n lot of people think they're good. \r\n Anyway, it's the best I can do. So \r\n if you'll excuse me, we'll be \r\n leaving. I guess I found out that \r\n all famous people - aren't big \r\n people . . .\r\n\r\n 98. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n The group watches him silently as he leaves the table \r\n accompanied by Babe. For a moment they are nonplussed - \r\n then they break into raucous laughter - all but Morrow.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n With Longfellow and Babe as they take several steps. Then \r\n he abruptly stops.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (turning to them)\r\n There's just one thing more. If it \r\n weren't for Miss Dawson being here \r\n with me, I'd probably bump your \r\n heads together.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (quickly)\r\n Oh, I don't mind.\r\n\r\n Longfellow stares at her for a moment.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Then I guess maybe I will.\r\n\r\n He starts back toward the table.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT AT TABLE\r\n\r\n Protectively, Brookfield and Henaberry rise from their \r\n chairs. But they are too late, for Longfellow clips \r\n Brookfield on the chin first with his left fist - and with \r\n his right catches Henaberry on the jaw. The punches are \r\n almost simultaneous. The surprise attack catches the men \r\n off-guard and they fall backward. A waiter rushes forward \r\n to escort Longfellow and Babe out.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n (calling out)\r\n Manager!\r\n\r\n Morrow, who never budged from his chair, and who has watched \r\n Longfellow with great admiration, now rises to catch up to \r\n him.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n (an outcry)\r\n Eureka!\r\n\r\n INT. FOYER OF TULLIO'S\r\n\r\n 101. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n As Morrow catches up to Longfellow and Babe, who are on \r\n their way out. The waiter is shooing people away.\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n Step aside, step aside!\r\n\r\n Morrow barges forward. Longfellow and Babe turn.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n (obviously groggy \r\n with drink)\r\n Say fellow, you neglected me - and \r\n I feel very put out.\r\n (points to his chin)\r\n Look, sock it right there, will \r\n you? Lay one right on the button,[6] \r\n but sock it hard.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE THREE\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's all right. I got it off my \r\n chest.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n The difference between them and me \r\n is I know when I've been a skunk. \r\n You take me to the nearest news-\r\n stand and I'll eat a pack of your \r\n postcards raw. Raw!\r\n\r\n Longfellow and Babe smile. As Morrow continues to speak, \r\n he sways drunkenly and would fall over backwards a couple \r\n of times in midsentence if the alert Longfellow didn't \r\n have a clutch on his collar.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Oh, what a magnificent deflation \r\n of smugness. Pal, you've added ten \r\n years to my life! A poet with a \r\n straight left and a right hook - \r\n delicious! Delicious! You're my \r\n guest from now on - forever and a \r\n day - even unto eternity!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Thanks, but Miss Dawson and I are \r\n going out to see the sights.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Fine, fine. Swell, You just showed \r\n me a sight lovely to behold, and \r\n I'd like to reciprocate. Listen, \r\n you hop aboard my magic carpet—\r\n (Longfellow catches \r\n him before he falls \r\n backward in his \r\n enthusiasm)\r\n —thanks - and I'll show you sights \r\n that you've never seen before.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'd kind of like to see Grant's \r\n Tomb - and the Statue of Liberty.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n Favoring Morrow.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Well, you'll not only see those, \r\n but before the evening's half \r\n through, you'll be leaning against \r\n the Leaning Tower of Pisa - you'll \r\n mount Mt. Everest. I'll show you \r\n the Pyramids and all the little \r\n Pyramiddes, leaping from sphinx to \r\n sphinx. Pal, how would you like to \r\n go on a real, old-fashioned binge?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (puzzled)\r\n Binge?\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Yes. I mean the real McCoy. Listen, \r\n you play saloon with me, and I'll \r\n introduce you to every wit, every \r\n nit-wit, and every half-wit in New \r\n York. We'll go on a twister that'll \r\n make Omar the soused philosopher \r\n of Persia[7] look like an anemic \r\n on a goat's milk diet.\r\n\r\n Longfellow saves him - once again - from crashing over.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - GROUP\r\n\r\n Featuring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (vaguely)\r\n That ought to be fun.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n Fun? Say, listen, I'll take you \r\n on a bender that will live in your \r\n memory as a thing of beauty and \r\n joy forever.\r\n (to someone off)\r\n Boy! Boy! My headpiece!\r\n\r\n He exits from the scene. CAMERA FOLLOWING HIM.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n (to the world in \r\n general)\r\n Oh, Tempora! Oh, Moeraes! Oh, \r\n Bacchus![8] He bumps into a woman, \r\n who glares at him.\r\n\r\n WOMAN\r\n Oh, you're drunk.\r\n\r\n MORROW\r\n (unmindful)\r\n Oh, you're right.\r\n\r\n 105. CLOSEUP - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Babe)\r\n I guess if we go with him, we'll \r\n see things, huh?\r\n\r\n She looks up at his face, amazed at his innocence.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes, I guess we will.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n INT. MAC'S OFFICE\r\n\r\n 106. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Mac is reading the story, eyes sparkling. Babe is sprawled \r\n in a chair, doing tricks with a coin.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (reads)\r\n \"'I play the tuba to help me think.' \r\n This is one of the many startling \r\n statements made by Longfellow Deeds - \r\n New York's new Cinderella Man - \r\n who went out last night to prove \r\n that his uncle, the late M.W. Semple -\r\n from whom he inherited $20,000,000 - \r\n was a rank amateur in the art of \r\n 'standing the town on its \r\n cauliflower ear' . . . \"\r\n\r\n He looks up.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Cinderella Man! That's sensational, \r\n Babe! Sensational!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n It took some high-powered acting, \r\n believe me.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Did it?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I was the world's sweetest ingenue.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Is he really that big a sap?\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Favoring Babe.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n He's the original. There are no \r\n carbon copies of that one.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Cinderella Man! Babe, you stuck a \r\n tag on that hick that'll stick to \r\n him the rest of his life. Can you \r\n imagine Cobb's face when he reads \r\n this?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n If we could sell tickets, we'd \r\n make a fortune.\r\n\r\n She covers the coin with palm of other hand, and the coin \r\n disappears. But Mac is too excited to pay any attention.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n How'd you get the picture?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Had the boys follow us.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Marvelous!\r\n (reads again)\r\n \"At two o'clock this morning, Mr. \r\n Deeds tied up traffic while he fed \r\n a bagful of doughnuts to a horse. \r\n When asked why he was doing it, he \r\n replied: 'I just wanted to see how \r\n many doughnuts this horse would \r\n eat before he'd ask for a cup of \r\n coffee.'\"\r\n (laughs)\r\n Beautiful! What happened after \r\n that?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I don't know. I had to duck to get \r\n the story out. He was so far along \r\n he never even missed me.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n When're you going to see him again?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Tonight, maybe.\r\n (looks at her watch)\r\n I'll phone him at noon.\r\n (explaining)\r\n Oh, my lunch hour. I'm a \r\n stenographer, you know. Mary Dawson.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Favoring Mac.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (laughing)\r\n You're a genius, Babe - a genius!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I even moved into Mabel Dawson's \r\n apartment - in case old snoopy \r\n Cobb might start looking around.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (all excited)\r\n Good! Good! Stay there. Don't \r\n show your face down here. I'll \r\n tell everybody you're on your \r\n vacation. They'll never know where \r\n the stories are coming from. Stick \r\n close to him, Babe - you can get \r\n an exclusive story out of him every \r\n day for a month. We'll have the \r\n other papers crazy.\r\n (starts for her)\r\n Babe, I could kiss you!\r\n\r\n 109. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (sidestepping)\r\n Oh, no. No. Our deal was for a \r\n month's vacation - with pay.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Sure.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n With pay! She is out the door.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (yelling after her)\r\n You'll get it, Babe. You'll get \r\n it.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 110. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Walter leans over the bed violently, shaking Longfellow, \r\n who is lost in drunken sleep.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Mr. Deeds - Mr. Deeds, sir - you \r\n really must get up. It's late!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (without budging - \r\n without opening \r\n his eyes)\r\n You're Walter, aren't you?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I just wanted to make sure.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - WALTER\r\n\r\n He smiles.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n If you'll permit me to say so, \r\n sir, you were out on quite a bender \r\n last night, sir.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n Longfellow opens one eye - and then the other, blinking. \r\n As consciousness returns to him, he glances around the \r\n room as if to get his bearings.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Bender? You're wrong, Walter. We \r\n started out to a binge but we never \r\n got to it.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Walter offers him a drink on a tray.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (humoring him)\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What's that?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n A Prairie Oyster, sir.[10]\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (slow to comprehend \r\n anything)\r\n Prairie? Oysters?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir. It makes the head feel \r\n smaller.\r\n\r\n Longfellow takes it and downs it in one swig.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (his face finally \r\n reacting)\r\n Oh. Oh!\r\n (remembering)\r\n Has Miss Dawson called yet?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Miss Dawson, sir? No, sir. No Miss \r\n Dawson has called, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n She was a lady in distress. She \r\n wouldn't let me help her. Got a \r\n lot of pride. I like that.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Oh, I do too, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'd better call her up and \r\n apologize. I don't remember taking \r\n her home last night.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n I'd venture to say, sir, you don't \r\n remember much of anything that \r\n happened last night, sir.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Favoring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What do you mean? I remember \r\n everything! Hand me my pants - I \r\n wrote her phone number on a piece \r\n of paper.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n You have no pants, sir.\r\n\r\n Longfellow looks up slowly. Walter goes on:\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n You came home last night - without \r\n them.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (after a double \r\n take)\r\n I did what!\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n As a matter of fact, you came home \r\n without any clothes. You were in \r\n your - uh - shorts. Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, don't be silly, Walter. I \r\n couldn't walk around in the streets \r\n without any clothes. I'd be \r\n arrested.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n That's what the two policemen said, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What two policemen?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n The ones who brought you home, \r\n sir. They said you and another \r\n gentleman kept walking up and down \r\n the streets, shouting: \"Back to \r\n nature! Clothes are a blight on \r\n civilization! Back to nature!\"\r\n\r\n Longfellow watches his face, fascinated. Slowly it is all \r\n coming back to him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Listen, Walter, if a man named \r\n Morrow calls up, tell him I'm not \r\n in. He may be a great author, but \r\n I think he's crazy. The man's crazy, \r\n Walter.\r\n\r\n 115. REVERSE ANGLE\r\n\r\n Favoring Walter.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir. By the way, did you—\r\n\r\n Longfellow slowly swings out of bed into a sitting position. \r\n Walter kneels to put on Longfellow's slippers. Longfellow \r\n balks, points, silently reminding Walter that he has broken \r\n his promise not to kneel down in front of him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (pointing)\r\n Please!\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n But how'll I put on the slipper, \r\n sir?\r\n\r\n Longfellow's expression begs no disagreement. Walter stands, \r\n fumbling with the shoes from a stooped posture.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (continuing)\r\n Yes, sir. I beg pardon, sir, but \r\n did you ever find what you were \r\n looking for, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Looking for?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n You kept searching me last night, \r\n sir. Going through my pockets. You \r\n said you were looking for a rhyme \r\n for Budington.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (flatly)\r\n Better bring me some coffee, Walter.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Very good, sir.\r\n (remembering)\r\n Oh, I beg pardon. A telegram came \r\n for you, sir.\r\n (he hands the \r\n telegram to \r\n Longfellow)\r\n I'll get you some black coffee, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n 116. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Following Walter's exit. Longfellow quickly opens the \r\n telegram. His face clouds. At this moment, Cobb comes \r\n bursting into the room - a newspaper in his hand.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (wildly)\r\n Did you see all this stuff in the \r\n papers?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (holding out telegram)\r\n Arthur wants to quit!\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Arthur! Who's Arthur?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He's the shipping clerk at the \r\n Tallow Works. Wants a $2 raise - \r\n or he'll quit.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (he goes crazy)\r\n What do I care about Arthur! Did \r\n you see this stuff in the paper? \r\n How'd it get in there? What'd you \r\n do last night? Who were you talking \r\n to?\r\n\r\n He flings the paper on the bed. Longfellow glances at it, \r\n and his face clouds.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (while Longfellow \r\n reads)\r\n And what'd you do to those \r\n bodyguards? They quit this morning. \r\n Said you locked them up.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, they insisted on following me.\r\n\r\n 117. TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (wildly)\r\n What do you think bodyguards are \r\n for?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (glances up)\r\n What do they mean by this - \r\n \"Cinderella Man!\"\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Are those stories true?\r\n\r\n 118. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND COBB\r\n\r\n Longfellow has his eyes glued on the paper.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I don't remember. \"Cinderella Man!\" \r\n What do they mean by that?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n They'd call you anything if you \r\n gave them half a chance. They've \r\n got you down as a sap.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (calmly)\r\n I think I'll go down and punch \r\n this editor on the nose.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (quickly)\r\n No, you don't! Get this clear: \r\n Socking people is no solution for \r\n anything.\r\n\r\n 119. TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sometimes it's the only solution.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Not editors. Take my word for it. \r\n Not editors!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n If they're going to poke fun at \r\n me, I'm going to—\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (bends over, \r\n earnestly)\r\n Listen. Listen, Longfellow. You've \r\n got brains, kid. You'll get along \r\n swell if you'll only curb your \r\n homicidal instincts - and keep \r\n your trap shut. Don't talk to \r\n anybody! These newshounds are out \r\n gunning for you.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (referring to paper)\r\n But what about this \"Cinderella \r\n Man\"?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n That's my job. I'll take care of \r\n that. I'll keep that stuff out of \r\n the papers - if you'll help me. \r\n But I can't do anything if you go \r\n around talking to people. Will you \r\n promise me to be careful from now \r\n on?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes, I guess I'll have to.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (mopping his brow)\r\n Thank you.\r\n (as he goes)\r\n If you feel the building rock, \r\n it'll be me blasting into this \r\n editor.\r\n\r\n 120. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n He exits. During the scene Walter has entered with a tray, \r\n which he has adjusted on Longfellow's knee.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Cobb's right. I mustn't talk to \r\n anybody.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (entering)\r\n Miss Dawson on the phone, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (alertly)\r\n Who? Miss Dawson?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Fine. I'll talk to her. Give me \r\n the phone, quick. She's the only \r\n one I'm going to talk to from now \r\n on.\r\n\r\n As the butler scurries around for the phone,\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. TOP OF FIFTH AVENUE BUS - NIGHT - (PROCESS)\r\n\r\n 121. CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n Longfellow looks around, absorbed. Babe watches him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n It's awfully nice of you to show \r\n me around like this.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I enjoy it.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n The Aquarium was swell. If I lived \r\n in New York, I'd go there every \r\n day. I'll bet you do.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Well, I'd like to - but I have a \r\n job to think of.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - A TAXI\r\n\r\n Directly behind the bus. A man's head is stuck out of taxi \r\n window. We recognize it as one of the photographers, Bob.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n (to driver)\r\n Hey, flap-ears![11] You better \r\n keep following that bus!\r\n\r\n DRIVER'S VOICE\r\n Keep your shirt on!\r\n\r\n INT. THE TAXI - PROCESS\r\n\r\n 123. CLOSE SHOT - BOB AND FRANK\r\n\r\n Two photographers, with their equipment. They keep their \r\n eyes glued on the bus in front. They return to their seats.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n It don't look as though we're gonna \r\n get any pictures tonight.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Babe ought to get him drunk again.\r\n\r\n EXT. TOP OF BUS\r\n\r\n 124. CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Got any news—\r\n\r\n (CATCHES HERSELF)\r\n I mean, has anything exciting been \r\n happening lately?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sure. I met you.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (laughs)\r\n Oh. What's happening about the \r\n opera?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, that - well, we had another \r\n meeting. I told them I'd go on \r\n being Chairman if—\r\n\r\n (EXPLAINING)\r\n I'm Chairman, you know.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes, I know.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I told 'em I'd play along with \r\n them if they lowered their prices - \r\n and cut down expenses - and \r\n broadcast.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n What did they say?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Gosh, you look pretty tonight.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n What did they say?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Huh? Oh. They said I was crazy. \r\n Said I wanted to run it like a \r\n grocery store.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n What are they going to do?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (leans over close \r\n to her)\r\n Do you always wear your hair like \r\n that?\r\n\r\n 125. WIDER SHOT\r\n\r\n At this point, two girls pass by, chattering. One girl has \r\n a paper open.\r\n\r\n FIRST GIRL\r\n Isn't it a scream - \"Cinderella \r\n Man!\" The dope!\r\n\r\n 2ND GIRL\r\n I'd like to get my hooks into that \r\n guy.\r\n\r\n FIRST GIRL\r\n Don't worry. Somebody's probably \r\n taking him for plenty.\r\n\r\n They are gone. Longfellow glares after them. Babe is afraid \r\n to look up.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (quietly)\r\n If they were men, I'd knock their \r\n heads together.\r\n\r\n Babe is silent. Longfellow watches her for a moment.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Favoring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Have you seen the papers?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's what I like about you. You \r\n think about a man's feelings. I'd \r\n like to go down to that newspaper \r\n and punch the fellow in the nose \r\n that's writing that stuff—\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n She looks up, startled.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n —\"Cinderella Man!\" I guess pretty \r\n soon everybody will be calling me \r\n \"Cinderella Man.\"\r\n\r\n Babe has had an uncomfortable time of it - and quickly \r\n changes the subject.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Would you like to walk the rest of \r\n the way? It's so nice out.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yeah, let's.\r\n\r\n She jumps up from her seat, and Longfellow follows.\r\n\r\n INT. THE TAXI\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Favoring the taxi driver.\r\n\r\n DRIVER\r\n Hey, wise guys. He's getting off.\r\n\r\n This sets off a mad scramble.\r\n\r\n BOB AND FRANK\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Hey, come on!\r\n\r\n Pull over to the curb!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. RIVERSIDE DRIVE - GRANT'S TOMB\r\n\r\n 129. MED. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE\r\n\r\n He stands across the street from Grant's Tomb, looking \r\n solemn. His eyes moist. She is unaware of his emotion.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Come on, don't you want to see it?\r\n\r\n INT. THE TAXI\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - BOB AND FRANK\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Feast your eyes. Grant's Tomb!\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Is that it?\r\n (to driver)\r\n Hey, beetle-puss! The Tomb!\r\n\r\n 131. MED. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE\r\n\r\n As they approach the monument.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n There you are. Grant's Tomb. I \r\n hope you're not disappointed.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (throatily)\r\n It's wonderful.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n To most people, it's an awful \r\n letdown.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (in awe)\r\n Huh?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I say, to most people it's a \r\n washout.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That depends on what they see.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (looks up at him)\r\n Now, what do you see?\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Me? Oh, I see a small Ohio farm \r\n boy becoming a great soldier. I \r\n see thousands of marching men. I \r\n see General Lee with a broken heart, \r\n surrendering, and I can see the \r\n beginning of a new nation, like \r\n Abraham Lincoln said. And I can \r\n see that Ohio boy being inaugurated \r\n as President—\r\n (dreamily)\r\n Things like that can only happen \r\n in a country like America.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n To intercut with above speech. During his recital, she \r\n watches his face, fascinated. Her impulse is to laugh, but \r\n she finds that she can't.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (overcome - he almost \r\n chokes on his final \r\n words)\r\n Excuse me!\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n INT. PRIVATE OFFICES\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n A switchboard operator fielding calls.\r\n\r\n SWITCHBOARD OPERATOR\r\n Sorry, Mr. Hopper. Mr. Cedar won't \r\n answer his phone. Sorry.\r\n\r\n OFFICE CLERK\r\n (passing by)\r\n Say, what's going on in the boss's \r\n office?\r\n\r\n SWITCHBOARD OPERATOR\r\n Search me. The three 'Cs' and little \r\n 'B' have been in there for over an \r\n hour.\r\n\r\n INT. CEDAR'S PRIVATE OFFICE\r\n\r\n 135. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar paces the floor. His brothers look worried. Budington \r\n is enthroned at Cedar's desk.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n don't want to be critical, John, \r\n but here it is—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (pouncing on him)\r\n Yes, I know. A week's gone by and \r\n we haven't got the Power of Attorney \r\n yet!\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n Yes, but you said—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (walking way from \r\n him)\r\n I don't care what I said. I can't \r\n strangle him, can I!\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n It's ridiculous for us to have to \r\n worry about a boy like that.\r\n (crosses to desk)\r\n Look at these articles about him! \r\n \"Cinderella Man!\" Why, he's carrying \r\n on like an idiot.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n Exactly what I was saying to my \r\n wife when this—\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n Who cares what you were saying to \r\n your wife?\r\n\r\n There is a moment's awkward silence. The silence is broken \r\n by the buzzing of the dictograph. Cedar crosses to it and \r\n snaps the button.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT DESK\r\n\r\n As secretary's voice comes over dictograph:\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Yes?\r\n\r\n SECRETARY'S VOICE\r\n Mr. and Mrs. Semple are still \r\n waiting.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (irritated)\r\n I can't help it. Let them wait!\r\n\r\n He snaps the dictograph off.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT GROUP\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n Those people have been in to see \r\n me every day this week.\r\n\r\n 2ND BROTHER\r\n Who are they ?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (dismissing it)\r\n Relatives of old man Semple.\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n They keep insisting they should \r\n have some nuisance value.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Nuisance value?\r\n\r\n FIRST BROTHER\r\n They say if it hadn't been for \r\n Deeds, they'd have gotten all the \r\n money.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (suddenly)\r\n Nuisance value.\r\n (thinks a minutes - \r\n crosses to door)\r\n Maybe they have! Maybe they have! \r\n Maybe they have!\r\n (opens door)\r\n Mr. and Mrs. Semple, please. How \r\n do you do?\r\n\r\n The others all stand around - as the Semples enter.\r\n\r\n MRS. SEMPLE\r\n We've been trying to—\r\n\r\n 138. MED. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND THE SEMPLES\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (smoothly cutting \r\n her off)\r\n I'm so sorry to have kept you \r\n waiting. How are you, sir? I don't \r\n know what my secretary could\r\n Have been thinking to keep you \r\n waiting this long.\r\n (to one of his \r\n brothers)\r\n Will you bring the chairs? Quickly. \r\n Will you have a cigar, Mr. Semple?\r\n\r\n MR. SEMPLE\r\n Thanks.\r\n\r\n Semple takes the cigar - rather flabbergasted at all the \r\n sudden attention showered upon him.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. ROOF OF TALL BUILDING - NIGHT\r\n\r\n 139. MED. SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE\r\n\r\n From over their shoulders, looking down on the lights and \r\n teeming activity of Times Square.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n There's Times Square.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You can almost spit on it, can't \r\n you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Why don't you try?\r\n\r\n He does try. The wind blows it back on him. She laughs, \r\n takes out a handkerchief and wipes it off his coat.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (as she wipes)\r\n Oh! It's breezy up here.\r\n\r\n He doesn't say anything right away.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You're worried about those articles \r\n they're writing about you, aren't \r\n you?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'm not worrying any more. I suppose \r\n they'll go on writing them till \r\n they get tired. You don't believe \r\n all that stuff, do you?\r\n\r\n A guilty look spreads over Babe's face.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, they just do it to sell the \r\n newspapers, you know.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yeah, I guess so. What puzzles me \r\n is why people seem to get so much \r\n pleasure out of hurting each other. \r\n Why don't they try liking each \r\n other once in a while?\r\n\r\n An awkward pause.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Shall we go?\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. CENTRAL PARK - NIGHT\r\n\r\n MED. TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n As Babe and Longfellow walk.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (spotting a park \r\n bench)\r\n Here's a nice place.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yeah. Anyway, there aren't any \r\n photographers around.\r\n\r\n EXT. PARK - BEHIND SOME BUSHES\r\n\r\n 141. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Bob and Frank, sneaking around in the bushes.\r\n\r\n 142. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You know, you said something to me \r\n when you first met me that I've \r\n thought about a great deal.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What's that?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You said I was a lady in distress.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, that—\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n What did you mean by that?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Nothing—\r\n\r\n There is a pause.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Have you got a - are you - uh - \r\n engaged or anything?\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n The corners of her mouth go up in sympathetic amusement.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No. Are you?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n No.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You don't go out with girls very \r\n much, do you?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n I haven't.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Why not?\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Favoring Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, I don't know.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You must have met a lot of swell \r\n society girls since you've been \r\n here. Don't you like them?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I haven't met anybody here that I \r\n like, particularly. They all seem \r\n to have the St. Vitus Dance.[12]\r\n (awkwardly)\r\n Except you, of course.\r\n (a pause)\r\n People here are funny. They work \r\n so hard at living - they forget \r\n how to live\r\n (thoughtfully; leans \r\n back)\r\n Last night, after I left you, I \r\n was walking along and looking at \r\n the tall buildings and I got to \r\n thinking about what Thoreau said. \r\n They created a lot of grand palaces \r\n here - but they forgot to create \r\n the noblemen to put in them.\r\n\r\n 145. REVERSE ANGLE\r\n\r\n Favoring Babe. She stares at him curiously.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'd rather have Mandrake Falls.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I'm from a small town too, you \r\n know.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (interested)\r\n Really?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Probably as small as Mandrake Falls.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (finding a kindred \r\n soul)\r\n Gosh! What do you know about that!\r\n\r\n Babe leans her head back in a reminiscent mood. We get a \r\n feeling that, for the moment, she has forgotten she is \r\n Babe Bennett, out on a story.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Ah, it's a beautiful little town, \r\n too. A row of poplar trees right \r\n along Main Street. Always smelled \r\n as if it just had a bath.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Longfellow watches her face intently.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I've often thought about going \r\n back.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You have?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, yes. I used to have a lot of \r\n fun there when I was a little girl. \r\n I used to love to go fishing with \r\n my father. That's funny. He was a \r\n lot like you, my father was. Talked \r\n like you, too. Sometimes he'd let \r\n me hold the line while he smoked - \r\n and we'd just sit there for hours. \r\n And after awhile, for no reason, \r\n I'd go over and kiss him and sit \r\n in his lap. He never said very \r\n much but once I remember him saying: \r\n \"No matter what happens, honey, \r\n don't complain.\"\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He sounds like a person worth while \r\n knowing.\r\n\r\n There is a pause while Longfellow watches her, and she is \r\n lost in thought.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (continuing)\r\n He played in the town band, too.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He did? I play the tuba—\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yeah, I know.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What did he play?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n The drums. He taught me to play \r\n some.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n He did?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes. I can do \"Swanee River.\" Would \r\n you like to hear me?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (enthusiastically)\r\n Sure!\r\n\r\n 147. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n She picks up a couple of branches. With the two sticks she \r\n drums on the bench seat - and sings \"Swanee River.\"\r\n\r\n When she is finished, though clearly delighted, he shows \r\n her a long face of mock-disappointment.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, I suppose you could do better.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sure. I can sing \"Humoresque.\"\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n \"Humoresque\"? I'll bet you don't \r\n even know how it goes.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sure. Look! You sing it over again, \r\n and I'll do \"Humoresque\" with you.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n It had better be good.\r\n\r\n She starts again, and he sings \"Humoresque\" in counterpoint \r\n to her drumming.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. PARK - BEHIND SOME BUSHES\r\n\r\n 148. CLOSE SHOT - BOB AND FRANK\r\n\r\n They wait with their camera. When they hear the singing, \r\n they look up, and then at each other in surprise.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n I wonder if they'd want to make it \r\n a quartet.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Shhh!\r\n\r\n 149. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow and Babe. They are having a grand time with \r\n their singing. A policeman saunters into the scene and \r\n stands watching them for a few seconds, without their being \r\n conscious of his presence. He smiles, shakes his head and \r\n passes on out of scene. Over the shot we hear the low moan \r\n of a siren in the distance.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n They reach the climax of their song - and laugh joyously. \r\n At this moment, the shrieking of the siren is nearer and \r\n louder. Longfellow looks up quickly. Excited, he jumps up \r\n and runs toward street. Babe looks up, surprised.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (as he runs off)\r\n Fire engine! Fire engine! I want \r\n to see how they do it. Wait for \r\n me, will you?\r\n\r\n 151. CLOSE SHOT - BOB AND FRANK BEHIND BUSHES\r\n\r\n Frank grabs the camera.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Looks like the evening is not going \r\n to be wasted!\r\n\r\n 152. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n They dash by the policeman, who looks up, startled.\r\n\r\n 153. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n As the fire engine slows down - and people are beginning \r\n to gather. We see Longfellow running toward the truck and \r\n hopping aboard.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT AT FIRE TRUCK\r\n\r\n As Longfellow jumps on.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Hello - what do you want?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (short salute)\r\n Captain Deeds - fire volunteer - \r\n Mandrake Falls.\r\n\r\n FIREMAN\r\n (amused)\r\n Hi, Cap! Boys, meet the Captain!\r\n\r\n LONG SHOT - REVERSE ANGLE\r\n\r\n Bob and Frank running with their cameras toward Longfellow.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LIVING ROOM OF MABEL DAWSON'S STUDIO\r\n\r\n 156. CLOSEUP\r\n\r\n Of typewriter carriage. It contains a paper upon which the \r\n following is typed:\r\n\r\n \"CINDERELLA MAN FIRE-EATING DEMON\"\r\n\r\n \"Longfellow Deeds, 'The Cinderella Man,' last night threw \r\n a 'defy' into the teeth of the New York Fire Department, \r\n that when it comes to extinguishing conflagrations - they \r\n had better look to their laurels—\"\r\n\r\n CAMERA PULLS BACK and we find Babe, staring at the sheet \r\n of paper in front of her. Her eyes have a distant look.\r\n\r\n 157. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Several feet away from her Mabel Dawson stands in front of \r\n an easel, working silently on a painting. She dabs at it \r\n and turning, pauses a moment to watch Babe, who at the \r\n moment rests her forehead on the typewriter carriage.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (softly)\r\n What's the matter, hon?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (quickly)\r\n Nothing.\r\n\r\n Babe is too much absorbed to hear this. Getting no response, \r\n Mabel turns and studies her for a few seconds.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n What's up, Babe? Something's eating \r\n you.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No. It's nothing.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n My unfailing instinct tells me \r\n something's gone wrong with the \r\n stew.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (murmuring)\r\n Don't be ridiculous.\r\n\r\n She again resumes her typing. Mabel crosses to her and \r\n looks over her shoulder.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n You haven't gotten very far, have \r\n you? That's where you were an hour \r\n ago. Come on, let's knock off and \r\n go down to Joe's. The gang's waiting \r\n for us.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (jumping up)\r\n I can't write it, Mabel! I don't \r\n know what's the matter with me.\r\n\r\n Babe lights a cigarette. Mabel studies her.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (quietly)\r\n Uh-huh. I think I can tell you.\r\n\r\n The phone bell rings. Mabel picks it up.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT PHONE\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (into phone)\r\n Hello . . .\r\n (listens)\r\n Yes, she's here. Who wants her?\r\n (listens)\r\n Who?\r\n (listens)\r\n Oh, yes. Yes, just a moment.\r\n (her hand over the \r\n mouthpiece)\r\n It's him - whatcha-ma-call-him - \r\n the \"Cinderella Man.\" The \r\n \"Cinderella Man\"!\r\n\r\n Babe grabs the phone.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Hello.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n Who lies dressed in bed, phone in hand.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (into phone)\r\n Couldn't sleep. Kinda wanted to \r\n talk to you. Do you mind?\r\n\r\n INT. MABEL'S LIVING ROOM\r\n\r\n 160. CLOSE SHOT - BABE AT PHONE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (sincerely)\r\n No - not at all. I couldn't sleep \r\n either.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n At phone.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I wanted to thank you again for \r\n going out with me.\r\n (listens)\r\n Huh? Well, I don't know what I'd \r\n do without you. You've made up for \r\n all the fakes that I've met.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 160\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Well, that's very nice. Thank you.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 161\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You know what I've been doing since \r\n I got home? Been working on a poem.\r\n (listens)\r\n It's about you.\r\n (listens)\r\n Sometimes it's kinda hard for me \r\n to say things - so I write 'em.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 160\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (touched)\r\n I'd like to read it some time.\r\n\r\n She listens for a moment, apparently moved by his sweetness.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 161\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Maybe I'll have it finished next \r\n time I see you.\r\n (listens)\r\n Will I see you soon?\r\n (listens)\r\n Gosh, that's swell, Mary.\r\n (listens)\r\n Good night.\r\n\r\n He hangs up, and lies back - enthralled.\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 160\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Good night.\r\n\r\n INT. APT. LIVING ROOM\r\n\r\n 162. MED. CLOSE SHOT - AT PHONE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Mabel, that guy's either the \r\n dumbest, the stupidest, the most \r\n imbecilic idiot in the world - or \r\n he's the grandest thing alive. I \r\n can't make him out.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (knowingly)\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I'm crucifying him.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n People have been crucified before.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Why? Why do we have to do it?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n You started out to be a successful \r\n newspaper woman, didn't you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yeah, then what?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (shrugging)\r\n Search me. Ask the Gypsies.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Here's a guy that's wholesome and \r\n fresh. To us he looks like a freak. \r\n You know what he told me tonight? \r\n He said when he gets married he \r\n wants to carry his bride over the \r\n threshold in his arms.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n The guy's balmy.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Is he? Yeah, I thought so, too. I \r\n tried to laugh, but I couldn't. It \r\n stuck in my throat.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Aw, cut it out, will you? You'll \r\n get me thinking about Charlie again.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n He's got goodness, Mabel. Do you \r\n know what that is?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Huh?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No - of course you don't. We've \r\n forgotten. We're too busy being \r\n smart-alecks.\r\n (sits at her \r\n typewriter)\r\n Too busy in a crazy competition \r\n for nothing.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n SERIES OF INSERTS:\r\n\r\n \"CINDERELLA MAN FIRE-EATING DEMON—\r\n\r\n Punches Photographer.\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n \"CINDERELLA MAN TO REFORM OPERA—\r\n\r\n Must be put on paying basis - or else - says post-card \r\n poet.\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n \"Madame Pomponi, Famous Opera Singer, To Launch Deeds on \r\n Social Career\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 164. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow is in bed in his pajamas, playing the tuba. \r\n Walter enters.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n I beg pardon, sir. I beg pardon, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n Longfellow stops, looking daggers at him.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Madame Pomponi is on the telephone, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Who?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Madame Pomponi. She says everything \r\n is all set for the reception.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What do you mean by coming in here \r\n when I'm playing?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n But she's on the telephone—\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Get out.\r\n (pointing)\r\n The evil finger's on you. Get out!\r\n\r\n Walter hurries out. Longfellow jumps up and chases him \r\n down the grand staircase. Longfellow stops at the top of \r\n the stairs, struck by an idea.\r\n\r\n INT. GRAND STAIRCASE\r\n\r\n 165. WIDE ANGLE\r\n\r\n Showing Walter at the bottom of the stairs and Longfellow \r\n at the top.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Stop!\r\n\r\n Walter halts. Longfellow gives a shout from the top of the \r\n stairs. There is a discernible echo.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Hey, did you hear that?\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n What, sir?\r\n\r\n Longfellow gives another shout. There is another echo. He \r\n tries it again - louder. Another echo. It is all very \r\n satisfactory.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (pleased)\r\n Why, that's an echo, sir!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You try it.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (timidly)\r\n Me, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (an order)\r\n Yeah.\r\n\r\n Walter gives a bird-like hoot. There is an echo.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (firmly)\r\n Louder.\r\n\r\n Walter gives a louder hoot. And louder. Each time, an echo.\r\n\r\n A butler in a bathrobe emerges to see what all the \r\n hullabaloo is about. Longfellow spots him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to butler)\r\n You try it.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Me, sir?\r\n\r\n But the butler clearly relishes the opportunity. He gives \r\n a little high-pitched squeak.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Louder!\r\n\r\n The butler tries it again - much better. Another man-servant \r\n has emerged. Longfellow points to him.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You try it!\r\n\r\n The man-servant tries it - very raspy, another tone \r\n altogether.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (waving like a \r\n conductor)\r\n All together!\r\n\r\n A symphony of hoots, shrieks, barks and echoes.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Again!\r\n\r\n The household staff do it again.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (surveying the scene - then, \r\n dramatically)\r\n Let that be a lesson to you.\r\n\r\n With that, Longfellow spins on his heel and returns to his \r\n bedroom.\r\n\r\n There is a pause. The butler takes command of the other \r\n two.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (gesturing \r\n imperiously)\r\n Go back to your room, both of you!\r\n\r\n Walter and the man-servant hasten to exit.\r\n\r\n The butler waits until nobody is looking, then gives one, \r\n final hoot. He murmurs to himself with satisfaction as he \r\n exits.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. LONGFELLOW'S HOME - NIGHT\r\n\r\n 166. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n Limousines arriving - from which guests emerge - in full \r\n evening dress.\r\n\r\n INT. DRAWING ROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT AT DOOR\r\n\r\n Madame Pomponi greets a group of guests. Ad-lib chatter is \r\n heard. From inside music emanates.\r\n\r\n AD-LIB CHATTER\r\n Oh, hello darling. So good of you \r\n to come.\r\n Sweet of you to ask me.\r\n Where is he?\r\n I'm just dying to see the \r\n \"Cinderella Man.\"\r\n\r\n CAMERA MOVES SWIFTLY among groups of people picking out \r\n vignettes of conversation. Longfellow is the hot topic.\r\n\r\n A husband and a wife whispering:\r\n\r\n A HUSBAND\r\n Shh! - he may hear you.\r\n\r\n A WIFE\r\n Even if he heard you, he wouldn't \r\n understand.\r\n\r\n MAN AND A WOMAN GOSSIPING:\r\n\r\n A MAN\r\n I hear he still believes in Santa \r\n Claus.\r\n\r\n A WOMAN\r\n Will he be Santa Claus? That's \r\n what I want to know.\r\n\r\n Another man holding forth to two elegantly-dressed women:\r\n\r\n ANOTHER MAN\r\n Have you all got your slippers \r\n ready for the \"Cinderella Man\"?\r\n\r\n WOMEN\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Yes, I have.\r\n\r\n Everybody laughs.\r\n\r\n FIRST WOMAN\r\n With $20,000,000, he doesn't have \r\n to have looks!\r\n\r\n 2ND WOMAN\r\n He won't have it long with that \r\n Pomponi woman hanging around him.\r\n\r\n Two women in evening dress twittering like birds:\r\n\r\n FIRST WOMAN\r\n (to other woman)\r\n My dear, I hear he can't think \r\n unless he plays his tuba!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. MABEL'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 168. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe is listlessly packing her few things in a small \r\n handbag. She slowly and meticulously folds a silken \r\n undergarment, wrapping it in tissue. Her eyes have a distant \r\n look. Mabel watches her, concerned. There is a long pause \r\n before either of them speaks.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (breaking the silence)\r\n You're a fool, Babe.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I just couldn't stand seeing him \r\n again.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Running away is no solution.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Babe is unresponsive.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (after a pause)\r\n What'll I tell him if he calls up?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Tell him I had to leave suddenly. \r\n I got a job in China - some place.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n You're acting like a school girl.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (suddenly - tensely)\r\n What else can I do? Keeping this \r\n up is no good. He's bound to find \r\n out sometime.\r\n (softly)\r\n At least I can save him that .\r\n\r\n They are suddenly startled by the boisterous entrance of \r\n Bob and Frank, whose voices are heard as they barge in.\r\n\r\n 170. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe, not wishing to explain to them, hides her bag - and \r\n follows Mabel to greet them in the living room.\r\n\r\n INT. LIVING ROOM\r\n\r\n MED. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n The boys cross to a table and drop their cameras.\r\n\r\n BOB AND FRANK\r\n Say, where is everybody? Come on, \r\n Babe - the artillery's ready.\r\n\r\n Mabel enters. Babe stands in doorway.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (by way of greeting)\r\n It's those two sore spots again.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n You shoulda been down to the office \r\n today, Babe.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Yeah. Mac threw Cobb out again.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Boy, was he burning.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n (reaching for a \r\n bottle)\r\n Just one little drink - and then \r\n we're ready to shoot.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (grabbing it away)\r\n Just a minute. No, you don't.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n We're not going out tonight.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Thought you had a date with him.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n It's off. He's having a party at \r\n his house.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Frank, Bob and Mabel.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n Say, what's the matter with her \r\n now !\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n You wouldn't know if I drew you a \r\n diagram. Now, run along and peddle \r\n your little tin-types.\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n What is this? Throwing us out of \r\n here's getting to be a regular \r\n habit.\r\n\r\n There is a knock on the door. They all look up.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT DOOR\r\n\r\n As Mabel opens the door slightly. We see Longfellow. Mabel's \r\n eyes open in surprise.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Is Mary Dawson here? I'm Longfellow \r\n Deeds.\r\n\r\n 175. CLOSE SHOT - BOB AND FRANK\r\n\r\n They stand - stupefied.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - MABEL\r\n\r\n She waves her hand back of her, for them to hide.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (loud - for the \r\n boys)\r\n Oh! Oh, yes, of course. Longfellow \r\n Deeds. Come in. Step in, please.\r\n\r\n 177. CLOSE SHOT - BOB AND FRANK\r\n\r\n They duck behind the sofa, CAMERA PANNING WITH THEM.\r\n\r\n 178. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow enters. Mabel closes the door behind him, \r\n watching him speculatively. Longfellow turns to Mabel.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You're Mabel - her sister - aren't \r\n you?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (flustered)\r\n Huh? Oh, yes - yes, of course. Her \r\n sister. Yes, I've been her sister \r\n for a long time.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Is she home?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Yeah. What?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Is Mary home?\r\n\r\n They look at each other stupidly - smiling feebly.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT ON TABLE\r\n\r\n Featuring the camera. A hand comes in from behind the sofa \r\n and yanks the camera out of sight.\r\n\r\n 180. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Mabel and Longfellow still standing, looking at each other.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Oh, Mary? Yes, of course. Well, I \r\n don't know whether she's home or \r\n not. I'll see.\r\n\r\n As she turns, Babe appears in doorway.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Why there she is! Of course she's \r\n home.\r\n (feebly)\r\n Stupid of me . . .\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Hello.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Hello, Mary. I waited in the park \r\n for you over an hour. I thought \r\n maybe you'd forgotten.\r\n\r\n 181. MED. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND BABE\r\n\r\n Mabel in b.g.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I didn't think you could come with \r\n the party and everything.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, I wouldn't let them stop me \r\n from seeing you. So I threw them \r\n out!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You threw them out!\r\n\r\n 182. CLOSER SHOT\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n You mean—\r\n (gesturing with \r\n hands)\r\n —by the neck or something?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Sure. They got on my nerves, so I \r\n threw 'em out.\r\n\r\n Mabel raises her eyebrows.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I guess that'll be in the papers \r\n tomorrow. It will give 'em something \r\n else to laugh at.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n Her face clouds - miserably.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n (lightly)\r\n I don't mind though. I had a lot \r\n of fun doing it.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (quickly)\r\n Would you like to go for a walk?\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes, if it isn't too late.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (going to bedroom)\r\n I'll get my hat.\r\n\r\n She disappears, leaving Mabel and Longfellow again staring \r\n at each other, self-consciously. Mabel smiles, ill-at-ease.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Nice day out - er, nice night - \r\n wasn't it? - isn't it?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n (tremulously)\r\n Yes, lovely. We've had a lot of \r\n nice weather lately.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (after a pause)\r\n It would be a nice night to go for \r\n a walk, don't you think?\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Oh yes, I think it'd be a swell \r\n night to go for a walk. A nice \r\n long one.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BEHIND SOFA\r\n\r\n Bob and Frank, holding their breaths.\r\n\r\n 186. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe comes out of bedroom.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Ready?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Gosh, she looks better every time \r\n I see her.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (vaguely)\r\n Thank you.\r\n\r\n She crosses to the door.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Mabel)\r\n Goodnight. Don't worry. I won't \r\n keep her out late.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n Thank you so much. Good night.\r\n\r\n They exit. Mabel sighs relievedly. The boys jump from their \r\n crouching positions.\r\n\r\n FRANK\r\n (wobbling forward)\r\n Ow! My foot's asleep!\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n (grabbing camera)\r\n Come on - let's go!\r\n\r\n Frank grabs his camera and both bolt toward the door. Mabel \r\n gets there one step ahead of them, and blocks their path.\r\n\r\n MABEL\r\n No, you don't. Just a minute. No \r\n more photographs.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. FRONT OF BABE'S HOME\r\n\r\n CLOSE TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n As they walk slowly down the front steps.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n The reason why I wanted to take a \r\n walk, Mary, is 'cause I wanted to \r\n talk to you.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Let's just walk, okay?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n All right.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TRUCKING SHOT\r\n\r\n As they walk along a foggy street, on their faces.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Mary, I'm going home.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Are you? When?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n In a day or so, I think.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I don't blame you.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n Continuing on them, as they slowly walk around the block.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n A man ought to know where he fits \r\n in. I just don't fit in around \r\n here. I once had an idea I could \r\n do something with the money, but \r\n they kept me so busy here, I haven't \r\n had time to figure it out. I guess \r\n I'll wait till I get back home.\r\n\r\n There is a long pause. Both lost in their own thoughts.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Do you mind if I talk to you, Mary? \r\n You don't have to pay any attention \r\n to me.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No, I don't mind.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n All my life, I've wanted somebody \r\n to talk to. Back in Mandrake Falls, \r\n I always used to talk to a girl.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n A girl?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, an imaginary one. I used to \r\n hike a lot through the woods and \r\n I'd always take this girl with me \r\n so I could talk to her. I'd show \r\n her my pet trees and things. Sounds \r\n kind of silly but we had a lot of \r\n fun doing it.\r\n\r\n (SMILING)\r\n She was beautiful.\r\n (then moodily)\r\n I haven't married 'cause I've been \r\n kinda waiting. You know, my mother \r\n and father were a great couple. I \r\n thought I might have the same kind \r\n of luck. I've always hoped that \r\n some day that imaginary girl would \r\n turn out to be real.\r\n\r\n They have arrived back at the front steps of Babe's home.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, here we are again.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes, here we are again.\r\n (after a pause)\r\n Good night.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (then, quickly - \r\n his voice faltering)\r\n Mary - I - excuse me—\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n Favoring Babe. She cuts him off, her voice shaking.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Goodbye, darling. Don't let anybody \r\n hurt you again - ever. They can't \r\n anyway. You're much too real. You \r\n go back to Mandrake Falls. That's \r\n where you belong - goodbye!\r\n\r\n 191. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n She runs up the steps.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Mary—\r\n\r\n She stops and turns. He walks up close to her.\r\n\r\n CLOSER SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n You know the poem I told you about? \r\n It's finished.\r\n\r\n His hand goes to his breast pocket - and then slowly is \r\n withdrawn - without bringing out the poem.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Would you like to read it? It's to \r\n you.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (scarcely audible)\r\n Yes, of course.\r\n\r\n He now takes the poem out. The paper is folded. He hands \r\n it to her and she slowly unfolds it. Just as she is about \r\n to read Longfellow lays a hand on her arm.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (a little frightened)\r\n You don't have to say anything, \r\n Mary. You can tell me tomorrow \r\n what you think.\r\n\r\n She looks into his eyes, but does not respond. Then she \r\n holds the paper up and begins reading. Longfellow watches \r\n her anxiously.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n READING SOFTLY:\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n \"I tramped the earth with hopeless \r\n beat - Searching in vain for a \r\n glimpse of you. Then heaven thrust \r\n you at my very feet, A lovely angel - \r\n too lovely to woo.\"\r\n\r\n The last words come with difficulty. Babe's eyes are slowly \r\n welling up.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n BABE CONTINUES READING:\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n \"My dream has been answered, but \r\n my life's just as bleak, I'm \r\n handcuffed and speechless in your \r\n presence divine - for my heart \r\n longs to cry out, if it only would \r\n speak, 'I love you, my angel - be \r\n mine, be mine.' \"\r\n\r\n Her voice is choked when she finishes. She does not look \r\n up until she refolds the paper. He stands close to her, \r\n waiting expectantly. Finally, she glances up. Her cheeks \r\n are moist, and her face clouded. Impulsively, she throws \r\n her arms around his neck, kissing him.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, darling!\r\n\r\n Longfellow's arms encircle her and for a few moments they \r\n remain in an emotional embrace.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (huskily)\r\n You don't have to say anything \r\n now. I'll wait till tomorrow - \r\n till I hear from you.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n Her eyes are beset with fears. She loves him - but knows \r\n how hopeless it all is. She slowly starts freeing herself \r\n from his embrace.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n As Babe, weeping softly, frees herself from his embrace.\r\n\r\n Longfellow gives a yelp of joy and leaps down the steps. \r\n He trips over a garbage pail and bumps into passersby, \r\n making a racket as he zigzags down the street and out of \r\n scene.\r\n\r\n A VOICE\r\n (shouting)\r\n Hey, what's the big idea?\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n INT. NEWSPAPER OFFICE - DAY\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - MAC\r\n\r\n Behind his desk.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Stop it, Babe! Stop it! What do \r\n you mean, you're quitting! You \r\n might as well tell me I'm quitting.\r\n\r\n As he speaks, CAMERA DRAWS BACK to reveal Babe near a \r\n window, peering out moodily. Mac crosses over to her side.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n What's bothering you, huh?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (after a pause)\r\n Last night he proposed to me.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Proposed to you! You mean he asked \r\n you to marry him?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (alert)\r\n Why, Babe - that's terrific!\r\n (sees it in print)\r\n \"Cinderella Man Woos Mystery Girl! \r\n Who is the Mysterious Girl That—\"\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Print one line of that, and I'll \r\n blow your place up!\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Sorry, Babe. Sorry. It would have \r\n made a swell story. I just got \r\n carried away. That's too bad. So \r\n he proposed to you, huh?\r\n (intrigued)\r\n What a twist! You set out to nail \r\n him - and he—\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (bitterly)\r\n Yeah. Funny twist, isn't it?\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (suddenly)\r\n Say, you haven't gone and fallen \r\n for that mug, have you?\r\n\r\n Babe's silence is eloquent.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Well, I'll be—\r\n\r\n He places an arm tenderly around her shoulder.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n That's tough, Babe.\r\n\r\n Babe smiles wryly.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (interested)\r\n What're you going to do?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (walking away)\r\n I'm going to tell him the truth.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Tell him you're Babe Bennett? \r\n Tell him you've been making a stooge \r\n out of him?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I'm having lunch with him today. \r\n He expects an answer. It's going \r\n to be pretty.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n You're crazy! You can't do that!\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE TWO\r\n\r\n Over their shoulders, from behind, as Mac comforts her.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n He'll probably kick me right down \r\n the stairs. I only hope he does.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n I'll put you on another job. You \r\n need never see him again, eh?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n That's the rub.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Oh, as bad as that, huh?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (far-away)\r\n Telling him is the long shot - I'm \r\n going to take it.\r\n\r\n He watches her sympathetically. Babe sighs resignedly.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (looking around)\r\n Well, it was fun while it lasted, \r\n Mac. I'll clean out my desk.\r\n\r\n She leaves him. Mac is deeply moved by her problem.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. GRAND STAIRCASE\r\n\r\n 200. WIDE SHOT\r\n\r\n As Longfellow, in a buoyant mood, emerges from his room \r\n and slides down the bannister of the grand staircase.\r\n\r\n INT. INTIMATE DINING ROOM\r\n\r\n 201. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Table is set for two. Two butlers putter around. Longfellow \r\n enters full of expectant enthusiasm. He is in his shirt \r\n sleeves. He hovers over them, checking their preparations.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n How's it going? Okay?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, quite all right. Thank you, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (picking up a salt \r\n shaker and examining \r\n it)\r\n Gold, eh?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (as he continues \r\n his puttering)\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Fourteen carat?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Is that the best you've got?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Oh, yes sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (seizing on another \r\n detail)\r\n Those flowers are too high. Won't \r\n be able to see her.\r\n (lifts a bowl of \r\n flowers off)\r\n Get a smaller bowl, will you?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (repeating his \r\n command as he hands \r\n the bowl to the \r\n other butler)\r\n A smaller bowl of flowers.\r\n\r\n 2ND BUTLER\r\n (exiting with flowers)\r\n Yes, sir. A smaller bowl of flowers.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to butler)\r\n Did you get that stuff I was telling \r\n you about?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Stuff, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That goo. That stuff that tastes \r\n like soap.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Oh, yes, sir. Here it is, sir. The \r\n pate de fois gras, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yeah, that's fine. Have a lot of \r\n it because she likes it.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n The other butler returns with a small bowl of flowers which \r\n he places in the center of the table.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now you got the idea. Fine.\r\n\r\n He sits in one of the chairs and leans forward in an \r\n imaginary conversation with Babe - his lips move but we \r\n hear nothing.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (motions to butler)\r\n Sit over there, will you?\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n Me sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n The butler sits.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Yes. You're too tall. Slink lower, \r\n will you?\r\n\r\n The butler does it.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n More. Now forward.\r\n\r\n They are practically nose to nose over the flowers.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (seriously)\r\n How is this, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (rising)\r\n Perfect! Perfect!\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n I wish you luck, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Thank you. Now don't touch a thing. \r\n Leave everything as it is.\r\n\r\n He hurries toward his bedroom.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 202. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow enters.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (yelling)\r\n Walter! Walter! Walter, where are \r\n you?\r\n\r\n Walter enters, panic-stricken.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir. What is it, sir? Anything \r\n happened3\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Anything happened? I've got to get \r\n dressed! I can't meet her like \r\n this!\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n But she isn't due for an hour, \r\n sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n An hour? What's an hour! You know \r\n how time flies, Walter. My tie? \r\n Get it.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir. Very good, sir. Here it \r\n is right here, sir. There, sir.\r\n\r\n While putting it on, he sings \"Humoresque\" loudly and gaily.\r\n\r\n 204. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n At this moment, Cobb bursts in - his face grim:\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Just as I suspected, wise guy! I \r\n don't mind you making a sap out of \r\n yourself - but you made one out of \r\n me, too.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Walter - merrily)\r\n Will you tell the gentleman I'm \r\n not in?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Mary Dawson, huh? Mary Dawson, my \r\n eye. That dame took you for a sleigh \r\n ride that New York will laugh about \r\n for years. She's the slickest, two-\r\n timing, double-crossing—\r\n\r\n At the mention of the name, Longfellow turns for the first \r\n time.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n His face goes livid, as Cobb's voice continues:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (between clenched \r\n teeth)\r\n What are you talking about?\r\n\r\n 206. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow has started out toward him. In two long strides, \r\n Longfellow has grabbed Cobb by the shirt-front, ready to \r\n strangle him.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n All right. Go ahead. Sock away, \r\n and then try to laugh this off.\r\n\r\n With his free hand, he reaches into his coat pocket. He \r\n unrolls a newspaper. Longfellow shifts his glance over to \r\n the photograph in the newspaper Cobb holds up, and slowly \r\n his grip on Cobb relaxes. He takes the newspaper.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As he looks at the picture.\r\n\r\n INSERT: PICTURE OF BABE BENNETT\r\n\r\n UNDER WHICH IS THE FOLLOWING:\r\n\r\n \"Louise (Babe) Bennett - wins Pulitzer Prize for reportorial \r\n job on Macklyn love triange.\"\r\n\r\n BACK TO SCENE\r\n\r\n Longfellow stares long and unbelievingly at the picture.\r\n\r\n 208. MED. CLOSE SHOT - COBB AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (adjusting his \r\n clothes)\r\n She's the star reporter on The \r\n Mail. Every time you opened your \r\n kisser, you gave her another story. \r\n She's the dame who slapped that \r\n monicker on you - \"Cinderella Man.\" \r\n You've been making love to a double \r\n dose of cyanide!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (an outcry)\r\n Shut up!\r\n\r\n Longfellow, stunned, crosses to the bed - CAMERA PANNING \r\n WITH HIM. He slumps down and continues staring at picture.\r\n\r\n 209. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Cobb crosses to phone and picks up receiver.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. NEWSPAPER OUTER OFFICE\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe is at her desk. She has just finished rummaging through \r\n her desk. Many articles are on top. Mac is by her side. \r\n Babe flicks the pages of a small loose-leaf book, and hands \r\n it to Mac.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n This is for you , Mac. The names \r\n of all the headwaiters in town. \r\n You can always buy a bit of choice \r\n scandal from them at reasonable \r\n prices.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Aw, listen Babe, I can't let you \r\n quit now. You're not going through \r\n with this thing, are you?\r\n\r\n Babe shakes her head with finality, as the phone bell rings.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n (picking up receiver)\r\n I've seen 'em get in a rut like \r\n you before - but they always come \r\n back.\r\n (into phone)\r\n Hello . . . Yes. Just a minute.\r\n\r\n He holds the receiver out to her.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n It's for you. In a couple weeks \r\n you'll get the itch so bad, you'll \r\n be working for nothing.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (into phone)\r\n Hello . . .\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n 211. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n Cobb is at the phone.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Babe Bennett? Just a minute.\r\n\r\n He listens and hands phone to Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (into phone)\r\n Hello, Mary?\r\n\r\n INT. NEWSPAPER OUTER OFFICE\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (at phone)\r\n Oh, hello darling.\r\n\r\n Her face goes dead as she realizes she is speaking to \r\n Longfellow.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (at phone; strained)\r\n Is it you who's been writing those \r\n articles about me?\r\n\r\n INT. NEWSPAPER OUTER OFFICE\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n At phone.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Why - uh - I was just leaving - \r\n I'll be up there in a minute—\r\n (listens)\r\n Look - uh, yes, I did - but I was \r\n just coming up to explain—\r\n\r\n The words die in her throat. She looks dully at the \r\n receiver.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S BEDROOM\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n BABE'S VOICE\r\n (coming over phone)\r\n Oh listen, darling, wait a minute! \r\n Please! Listen—\r\n\r\n He hangs up. His face is a dead mask, every illusion \r\n shattered. Slowly, a wry smile appears on his face and, \r\n rising, he wanders around the room in deep abstraction. \r\n Cobb and Walter watch him sympathetically.\r\n\r\n Longfellow is silent a long time.\r\n\r\n 216. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n As a butler enters.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n I beg pardon, sir. Shall I serve \r\n the wine with the squab, sir?\r\n\r\n Longfellow doesn't hear him.\r\n\r\n BUTLER\r\n (tries again)\r\n I beg pardon, sir.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - COBB\r\n\r\n His face softens.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n If I knew you were going to take \r\n it so hard, I woulda kept my mouth \r\n shut. Sorry.\r\n\r\n 218. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n As finally Longfellow speaks, \r\n without turning.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (quietly)\r\n Pack my things, Walter. I'm going \r\n home.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n He immediately busies himself.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CORRIDOR\r\n\r\n 219. WIDE SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow emerges from his bedroom, walking briskly toward \r\n the staircase, immediately followed by Cobb and Walter. \r\n Walter is loaded down with suitcases. Longfellow is wearing \r\n coat and hat.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (trying to keep up \r\n with Longfellow)\r\n You shouldn't be running away like \r\n this. What's going to happen to \r\n the Estate?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n They can have the Estate.\r\n\r\n As they approach the staircase, a commotion is heard from \r\n stairs. Cobb hurries ahead to see what is going on.\r\n\r\n INT. GRAND FOYER\r\n\r\n 220. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Two butlers are struggling with a wild-eyed man of middle \r\n age. They shout in unison.\r\n\r\n BUTLERS\r\n (simultaneously)\r\n You can't come up here!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Let me go! I wanna see him!\r\n\r\n BUTLERS\r\n He's not home, I tell you!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n I wanna see that guy!\r\n\r\n BUTLERS\r\n We'll send for the police!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Let me go!\r\n\r\n They continue to struggle as Cobb reaches them.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n What's going on here?\r\n\r\n The man yanks himself free.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n There he is! I just wanted to get \r\n a look at him.\r\n\r\n He sees Longfellow over Cobb's shoulder.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n There you are! I just wanted to \r\n see what kind of a man you were!\r\n\r\n He struggles to thrust Cobb aside.\r\n\r\n 221. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n Favoring Longfellow, who has reached the bottom of the \r\n staircase and watches the man warily.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n (wildly)\r\n I just wanted to see what a man \r\n looks like that can spend thousands \r\n of dollars on a party - while people \r\n around him are hungry! The \r\n \"Cinderella Man,\" huh? Did you \r\n ever stop to think how many families \r\n could have been fed on the money \r\n you pay out to get on the front \r\n pages?\r\n\r\n Cobb forcibly restrains the man.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Come on! Take him out of here!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Let me go!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (an order)\r\n Let him alone.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Let me alone!\r\n (threateningly)\r\n If you know what's good for you - \r\n you'll let me get this off my chest!\r\n (to Longfellow)\r\n How did you feel feeding doughnuts \r\n to a horse? Get a kick out of it, \r\n huh? Got a big laugh?\r\n (sarcastically)\r\n Did you ever think of feeding \r\n doughnuts to human beings! No!\r\n\r\n Longfellow stares at him.\r\n\r\n WALTER\r\n (quietly)\r\n Shall I call the police, sir?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n No!\r\n (to man)\r\n What do you want!!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Yeah - that's all that's worrying \r\n you. What do I want? A chance to \r\n feed a wife and kids! I'm a farmer. \r\n A job! That's what I want!\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n A farmer, eh! You're a moocher, \r\n that's what you are! I wouldn't \r\n believe you or anybody else on a \r\n stack of bibles! You're a moocher \r\n like all the rest of them around \r\n here, so get out of here!\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Sure - everybody's a moocher to \r\n you. A mongrel dog eating out of a \r\n garbage pail is a moocher to you!\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (starting to push \r\n him towards the \r\n door)\r\n This won't do you any good—\r\n\r\n The man shoves him away, suddenly whips out a gun and levels \r\n it at him.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Stay where you are, young feller. \r\n Get over there.\r\n\r\n Cobb backs away and the man points the gun at Longfellow, \r\n who remains staring at him, immobilely.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n (tensely)\r\n You're about to get some more \r\n publicity, Mr. Deeds! You're about \r\n to get on the front page again! \r\n See how you're going to like it \r\n this time!\r\n (voice rises)\r\n See what good your money's going \r\n to do when you're six feet under \r\n ground. You never thought of that, \r\n did you? No! All you ever thought \r\n of was pinching pennies - you money-\r\n grabbing hick! You never gave a \r\n thought to all of those starving \r\n people—\r\n (his voice wavers)\r\n —standing in the bread lines—\r\n (huskily)\r\n —not knowing where their next meal \r\n was coming from! Not able to feed \r\n their wife and kids.\r\n (voice breaks)\r\n Not able to—\r\n\r\n He can't go on. A sob escapes. He reaches up and brushes \r\n away a tear with a rough hand. It seems to bring him to \r\n his senses. He glances down and seeing the gun in his hand - \r\n stares at it in surprise. He realizes what he was about to \r\n do.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n (scarcely audible)\r\n Oh!\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT - THE GROUP\r\n\r\n The man slumps into a chair and the gun drops to the floor. \r\n Cobb bends quickly and picks it up. Longfellow never moves.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n (dead voice - staring \r\n into space)\r\n I'm glad I didn't hurt nobody. \r\n Excuse me.\r\n\r\n He turns his head slowly and peers at them with non-seeing \r\n eyes, then suddenly he hides his face in his hands and \r\n sobs.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n (muffled)\r\n Crazy. You get all kinds of crazy \r\n ideas.\r\n\r\n Longfellow watches him pityingly.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Sorry. I didn't know what I was \r\n doing.\r\n\r\n The rest of it seems to come out of him effortfully - his \r\n voice breaking.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Losing your farm after twenty years' \r\n work - seeing your kids go hungry - \r\n a game little wife saying \r\n \"Everything's going to be all \r\n right.\"\r\n (stridently)\r\n Standing there in the bread lines. \r\n It killed me to take a handout.\r\n (pathetically)\r\n I ain't used to it.\r\n (resigned)\r\n Go ahead and do what you want with \r\n me, mister.\r\n (scarcely audible)\r\n I guess I'm at the end of my rope.\r\n\r\n He sobs openly. While he was speaking, Longfellow was \r\n peering into the man's face intently. As the man finishes\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. INTIMATE DINING ROOM\r\n\r\n 223. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n At the table that was all set for Babe. The man sits, \r\n eating. He seriously bends over his food. Longfellow sits \r\n opposite him - his eyes glued on the man, absorbed in \r\n profound thought.\r\n\r\n MAN\r\n (tentatively)\r\n Can I take some of this home with \r\n me?\r\n\r\n Longfellow nods.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INSERT: NEWSPAPER HEADLINES\r\n\r\n \"LONGFELLOW DEEDS TO GIVE FORTUNE AWAY Huge farming district \r\n to be divided into ten acre farms - fully equipped - at a \r\n cost of eighteen million dollars.\"\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n INSERT: SECOND NEWSPAPER HEADLINE \"DEEDS' PLAN STARTLES \r\n FINANCIAL WORLD\"\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n INSERT: THIRD NEWSPAPER HEADLINE \"STAFF OF WORKERS \r\n INVESTIGATE APPLICANTS\"\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n INSERT: FOURTH NEWSPAPER HEADLINE \"THOUSANDS OF UNEMPLOYED \r\n STORM DEEDS HOME FOR FARM DONATIONS\"\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. LONGFELLOW DEEDS' HOME\r\n\r\n 224. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n A mob of shouting men and women clamor at the gates, being \r\n jostled around by the police.\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S DRAWING ROOM\r\n\r\n 225. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n It has been transformed into an office. Longfellow sits at \r\n one end of the room. Clerks are at several desks. On one \r\n side and leading out into the hall, is a long line of men \r\n waiting to be interviewed.\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Go on. Step lively.\r\n\r\n 226. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n At Longfellow's desk. He has a two days' growth of beard \r\n and looks worn. Next to him is a clerk. In front of him is \r\n an applicant.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (as the camera moves \r\n in on him)\r\n Are you married?\r\n\r\n APPLICANT\r\n Yes, sir.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Any children?\r\n\r\n APPLICANT\r\n No, no children.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n All right, Mr. Dodsworth. I think \r\n you'll qualify.\r\n (he hands him a \r\n form)\r\n Take this to that desk over there \r\n for further instructions.\r\n\r\n APPLICANT\r\n (gratefully - exiting)\r\n Thank you very much.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Next, please.\r\n\r\n A man steps forward and stands in front of his desk.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT AT DESK\r\n\r\n Longfellow, clerk and applicant.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to clerk)\r\n How many does that make?\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n You've okayed 819.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (wearily)\r\n Is that all?\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n That's all.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n It's going awfully slow. We need \r\n 1100 more.\r\n (phone rings)\r\n Hello . . . oh, yes. Yes. The water \r\n development seems okay - but I \r\n don't like the road layout yet. \r\n Come up tonight about ten and bring \r\n the maps. Right.\r\n\r\n He hangs up.\r\n\r\n 228. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As the farmer in previous sequence approaches.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Here's the order for the plows. We \r\n got a good price on them.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's fine. Thanks. I'll look 'em \r\n over later.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n Oh, Mr. Deeds—\r\n\r\n Longfellow looks up. Farmer goes on:\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n —my wife wanted me to tell you \r\n she—\r\n (hesitates)\r\n —she prays for you every night.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (embarrassed)\r\n Well, thanks, I - uh—\r\n (to applicant in \r\n front of him)\r\n How do you do? What is your name?\r\n\r\n RANKIN\r\n George Rankin, sir.\r\n\r\n WHILE LONGFELLOW WRITES—\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT A DESK\r\n\r\n Cobb is on the phone.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (into phone)\r\n No! No! We're not buying any bulls. \r\n What's that?\r\n\r\n Listen, fellow, bull's what I've been selling all my life!\r\n\r\n He slams down the receiver.\r\n\r\n INT. CEDAR'S OFFICE\r\n\r\n 230. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar behind his desk. In front of him is Henry Semple and \r\n his nagging wife. Cedar shoves a paper in front of Semple.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We have very little time. He's \r\n ordered me to turn everything over \r\n to him immediately. We have to \r\n work fast before he disposes of \r\n every penny.\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n See! I told you something could \r\n be done. I knew it all the time. \r\n Sign it, dear.\r\n\r\n SEMPLE\r\n (hesitating)\r\n We may get into trouble.\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n Oh, don't be so squeamish.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n There are millions involved. After \r\n all, you have your legal rights. \r\n You're his only living relatives.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT DESK\r\n\r\n As Semple picks up the paper.\r\n\r\n SEMPLE\r\n What's it say?\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n That's your agreement with Mr. \r\n Cedar, if we win.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n You see, my end is going to be \r\n rather expensive. I have a lot of \r\n important people to take care of. \r\n I have the legal machinery all set \r\n and ready to go. I've been working \r\n on nothing else for the last week. \r\n You say the word, and we'll stop \r\n this yokel dead in his tracks.\r\n\r\n WIFE\r\n Sign it!\r\n\r\n SEMPLE\r\n Oh, all right.\r\n\r\n With the perturbed expression still on his face, Semple \r\n reaches over to sign the document. Simultaneously, Cedar \r\n flicks a button on his dictagraph.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (into dictagraph)\r\n Charlie, we're off! Papers all \r\n set?\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n All set.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Okay, then. Go to it.\r\n (afterthought)\r\n And, Charlie—\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Yeah?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Find out who wrote those newspaper \r\n articles and subpoena them right \r\n away.\r\n\r\n VOICE\r\n Okay.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. LONGFELLOW'S DRAWING ROOM\r\n\r\n 232. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n A large, raw-boned Swede stands before Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n What is your name?\r\n\r\n SVENSON\r\n Christian Svenson.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Farmer?\r\n\r\n SVENSON\r\n Yes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Where is your farm?\r\n\r\n SVENSON\r\n South Dakota north.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n South Dakota - north?\r\n\r\n SVENSON\r\n South Dakota - but on the top.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh. Oh!\r\n\r\n 233. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n Cobb enters, very businesslike.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n What about your knocking off for \r\n lunch?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Not hungry. I want to get through \r\n this work in a hurry, and then I \r\n want to go home. What price did \r\n you get on those trucks?\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Come on, come on. What are you \r\n trying to do, kid? Keel over? You \r\n haven't been out of this house in \r\n two weeks.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (tired)\r\n Well, maybe I will have a sandwich.\r\n (to Swede)\r\n Do you mind waiting a few minutes?\r\n\r\n SVENSON\r\n (undoing paper \r\n package)\r\n Oh, sure, sure. If you like to \r\n have a sandwich, I can give you \r\n one, please.\r\n\r\n He brings out two huge sandwiches, and hands one to \r\n Longfellow.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (smiling)\r\n Thanks. Thank you. Never mind, \r\n Cobb.\r\n\r\n He takes it, and he and the Swede silently eat. Longfellow \r\n looks up.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Good.\r\n\r\n The Swede smiles. Longfellow nibbles his sandwich, then \r\n glances around the room. His gaze rests on:\r\n\r\n 234. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n Of the long line of applicants waiting for an audience.\r\n\r\n 235. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (calls to Cobb)\r\n Cobb! Get lunch for the rest of \r\n them.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (entering)\r\n What? There must be 2000 of them \r\n out there.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, that doesn't make 'em any \r\n less hungry.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Okay, Santa Claus. 2000 lunches.\r\n\r\n He exits. Longfellow glances over at the line, smiling.\r\n\r\n 236. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n In front of the line there is a slight scuffle, as a man \r\n is being pushed forward by some others. He mumbles a \r\n protest, tries to get back into position, but the men push \r\n him forward again.\r\n\r\n GROUP\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Go on, say something. Say something!\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He looks up inquiringly.\r\n\r\n 238. MED. CLOSE SHOT - MEN IN LINE\r\n\r\n The man finally is resigned, and stands shifting, ill-at-\r\n ease, his head hanging bashfully.\r\n\r\n MAN\r\n Mr. Deeds, the boys here wanted me \r\n to say a little something. They \r\n just wanted me to say that—\r\n (clears his throat)\r\n Well, they wanted me to say that—\r\n (quickly gets it \r\n out)\r\n We think you're swell - and that's \r\n no baloney.\r\n\r\n MAN'S VOICE\r\n Say something more!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He smiles self-consciously.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT OF MEN\r\n\r\n The spokesman apparently has not finished yet. Directly \r\n behind the line, three officious-looking men have made \r\n their appearance and wait for him to conclude.\r\n\r\n MAN\r\n Give me a chance, fellas. We're \r\n all down and out - but when a fellow \r\n like you comes along, kinda gives \r\n us a little hope - and they just \r\n wanted me to say—\r\n\r\n It's as far as he gets - as the three strangers break their \r\n way through the line and approach Longfellow's desk.\r\n\r\n ONE OF THE SHERIFFS\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Break it up.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT AT DESK\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n (pointing to \r\n Longfellow)\r\n That's him.\r\n\r\n 2ND DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n Are you Longfellow Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (looks up)\r\n Yes?\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n Sheriff's office.\r\n (shows paper)\r\n We've got a warrant to take you \r\n into custody.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (without moving)\r\n A what?\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n A warrant for your arrest. You'll \r\n have to come along with us.\r\n\r\n Cobb enters.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n What's up? What do you mugs want?\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n I don't know nothing, buddy. All I \r\n know is the Sheriff gives me an \r\n insanity warrant to execute.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Insanity! Who's says he's insane?\r\n\r\n They all turn to Charlie, who comes forward.\r\n\r\n CHARLIE\r\n The complainant is a relative of \r\n the late Martin Semple. The charges \r\n are that Mr. Deeds is insane and \r\n incapable of handling the Estate.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Oh, somebody got panic-stricken \r\n about his giving his dough away, \r\n eh?\r\n (to sheriff)\r\n Where do you think you're going to \r\n take him?\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n To the County Hospital.\r\n\r\n CHARLIE\r\n Of course, that's only temporary. \r\n A hearing will follow immediately.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As he speaks quietly.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's fine. Just because I want \r\n to give this money to people who \r\n need it, they think I'm crazy.\r\n (cynically)\r\n That's marvelous. That makes \r\n everything complete.\r\n\r\n 243. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n To include group.\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n Let's get going!\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Wait a minute! Not so fast. We're \r\n going to get a lawyer. I'll call \r\n Cedar.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (thoroughly \r\n disillusioned)\r\n No, don't bother.\r\n\r\n CHARLIE\r\n As a matter of fact, I'm from Mr. \r\n Cedar's office. He represents the \r\n complainant.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Oh.\r\n\r\n Longfellow glances up at him and smiles bitterly.\r\n\r\n FIRST DEPUTY SHERIFF\r\n Well, let's go. We're wasting a \r\n lot of time.\r\n\r\n He goes to one side of Longfellow, and his partner to the \r\n other. They take Longfellow by the arms. He glances down \r\n casually and, suddenly, violently pushes the deputies away \r\n from him. They are thrown backward; their eyes widen in \r\n surprise.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (calmly rising)\r\n All right, I'll go. But get your \r\n hands off me!\r\n\r\n 244. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow starts to walk forward, accompanied by Cobb - \r\n and the two deputies and Charlie fall in behind them.\r\n\r\n THE SHERIFFS\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Make way! Make way!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOTS OF CLERKS\r\n\r\n To be intercut with above scene. They stare, petrified, \r\n and mumble to each other.\r\n\r\n 246. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Of the farmers and other applicants. The line has fallen \r\n out and they stand in a bunch, staring pathetically and \r\n hopelessly at the departing group.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP OF THE FARMER\r\n\r\n Who stands in f.g. of bunch. What is taking place has slowly \r\n penetrated his befuddled brain. The disappointment he feared \r\n is here. His body imperceptibly sags, his eyes dim - all \r\n hope having gone out of them.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n INSERT: SIGN READING: \"COUNTY HOSPITAL\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE THRU TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CORRIDOR OF HOSPITAL\r\n\r\n 248. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n A guard sits at a desk near a door, talking on the \r\n telephone.\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n (on phone)\r\n Yes, most everybody in town has \r\n been here to see him. Yes, sir. I \r\n won't. Goodbye—\r\n\r\n Babe rounds the corner quickly, heading for the door. The \r\n guard hurriedly hangs up and stands to block her.\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n Sorry, lady—\r\n\r\n (RECOGNIZES HER)\r\n Oh, it's you again.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, please! I've got to see him.\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n Now listen, sister, for the \r\n fourteenth and last time he don't \r\n want to see nobody.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (pleading)\r\n Will you just give him my name?\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n (confidentially)\r\n Listen, toots, just between us, \r\n there ain't a thing in the world \r\n the matter with that guy till I \r\n mention your name, then he goes \r\n haywire!\r\n\r\n Babe winces under the blow.\r\n\r\n INT. HOSPITAL ROOM\r\n\r\n 249. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow is seated by the far wall, peering moodily out \r\n the window. Cobb paces about. Suddenly, he wheels on \r\n Longfellow.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n What are you going to do - just \r\n sit back and let them railroad \r\n you? It's as pretty a frameup as \r\n ever hit this rotten town! If you'd \r\n just let me get you a lawyer!\r\n\r\n Longfellow pays no attention to him.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n As Cobb continues.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (raises his voice)\r\n You can't walk into that courtroom \r\n without being ready to protect \r\n yourself in the clinches. Cedar's \r\n too smart. With the array of talent \r\n he's got lined up against you - \r\n you're cooked!\r\n\r\n Longfellow is still unresponsive. Cobb thinks a moment, \r\n watching him studiously; then pleading tenderly:\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Listen, pal - I know just how you \r\n feel. A blonde in Syracuse put me \r\n through the same paces. I came out \r\n with a sour puss - but full of \r\n fight. Come on, you don't want to \r\n lay down now.\r\n\r\n Longfellow is still unresponsive.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Do you realize what's happening? \r\n They're trying to prove that you're \r\n nuts! If they win the case, they'll \r\n shove you in the bughouse. The \r\n moment they accuse you of it, they \r\n have you half licked. You've got \r\n to fight!\r\n\r\n Longfellow disregards him and Cobb sighs, resignedly.\r\n\r\n INT. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE DOOR\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n The guard is reading his paper. Babe is still waiting, \r\n pacing.\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n Go on, sit down, won't you?\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT AT DOOR\r\n\r\n As Cobb comes out. The guard gets up to check the door is \r\n locked.\r\n\r\n GUARD\r\n So long, Mr. Cobb.\r\n\r\n Cobb, in a troubled frame of mind, doesn't respond and \r\n starts down corridor - CAMERA TRUCKS WITH HIM. Babe catches \r\n up with him.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Corny!\r\n\r\n Cobb doesn't stop. Babe grabs his arm:\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Corny!\r\n\r\n Cobb stops.\r\n\r\n CLOSE TWO SHOT\r\n\r\n Cobb glares at Babe belligerently.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I've got to see him! I've got to \r\n talk to him!\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Haven't you done enough damage \r\n already?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (ignoring his attack)\r\n Somebody's got to help him! He \r\n hasn't got a chance against Cedar. \r\n Look, I've been all over town \r\n talking to everybody. I've got Mac \r\n all lined up - and the paper's \r\n behind him. And I can get him \r\n Livingston, too. With a lawyer \r\n like Livingston, he's got a fighting \r\n chance.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (coldly)\r\n You're wasting your time. He doesn't \r\n want any lawyers. He's sunk so \r\n low, he doesn't want help from \r\n anybody.\r\n (bitterly)\r\n You can take a bow for that.\r\n (huskily)\r\n As swell a guy as ever hit this \r\n town, and you crucified him! For \r\n a couple of stinking headlines! \r\n You've done your bit - now stay \r\n out of his way!\r\n\r\n He exits abruptly, leaving Babe staring despairingly at \r\n his disappearing back, his brutal diatribe ringing harshly \r\n in her ears.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n INSERT: NEWSPAPER HEADLINES \"DEEDS SANITY HEARING TODAY!\r\n\r\n Semple Heir Charged With Incompetency! 'Should Be Confined \r\n To An Institution,' Declares Cedar.\r\n\r\n \"Longfellow Deeds Refuses Counsel; Remains Incommunicado.\"\r\n\r\n \"Farmers Aroused At Efforts to Balk Their Benefactor.\"\r\n\r\n \"Police Surround Courthouse In Anticipation Of Outbreak.\"\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. COURTHOUSE\r\n\r\n 254. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n Of an unruly mob - being jostled by the police.\r\n\r\n INT. CORRIDOR OF COURTHOUSE\r\n\r\n 255. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n The corridor is jammed with curious public endeavoring to \r\n gain entrance. Perspiring police fight to keep them back.\r\n\r\n INT. COURTROOM\r\n\r\n 256. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n It is practically full. The few empty seats are being \r\n quickly filled. People stumble over each other to find a \r\n seat. The judge is not yet at his bench. There is a general \r\n chatter of excitement and anticipation.\r\n\r\n 257. MED. SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Among the spectators Babe sits beside Mac. She stares, \r\n expression-less. Mac glances at her sympathetically.\r\n\r\n 258. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring the farmer who broke into Longfellow's house. \r\n Near him is the Swede we saw - and others.\r\n\r\n SHOT INSIDE RAILING\r\n\r\n Cedar and his assistants arrange their papers. Two dignified \r\n gentlemen, psychiatrists, await action, arms folded. Near \r\n them is Henry Semple, the complainant, his nose twitching \r\n nervously. By his side is his wife, sparkling expectantly.\r\n\r\n SHOT AT LONG TABLE\r\n\r\n At which sit a dozen newspaper reporters.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n From a side door Longfellow enters, accompanied by his \r\n guard. Immediately the place is astir. As he advances to a \r\n chair in front of a table—\r\n\r\n 262. MED. FULL SHOT - COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Necks crane for a glimpse. Whispered conversations take \r\n place.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - HENRY SEMPLE\r\n\r\n He looks guilty, nose twitching more violently than ever.\r\n\r\n SEMPLE\r\n (to Cedar)\r\n Here he is!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND MAC\r\n\r\n Babe sits up, her eyes riveted on Longfellow. Impulsively \r\n she starts to rise, but Mac puts a restraining hand on \r\n her.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Longfellow turns neither to left nor right. He is slumped \r\n low in his chair, staring solemnly into space. Cobb breaks \r\n into scene and sits down beside him.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (full of excitement)\r\n Cedar just sent for me. Wants to \r\n make a settlement. Here's your \r\n chance to get out of the whole \r\n mess. What do you say?\r\n\r\n He gets no response from Longfellow.\r\n\r\n There is a stir in the courtroom.\r\n\r\n MED. LONG SHOT\r\n\r\n The bailiff calls out as the Judge proceeds to his bench.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF\r\n Quiet, please! The Supreme Court \r\n of the State of New York, County \r\n of New York, is now in session, \r\n the Honorable John May, Judge, \r\n presiding. Be seated.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n To include Judge and Longfellow.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n The court wishes to warn those \r\n present that it will tolerate no \r\n disturbances.\r\n (to Longfellow)\r\n Regarding the sanity hearing of \r\n Longfellow Deeds, are you \r\n represented by counsel, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n Almost imperceptibly, Longfellow shakes his head no. The \r\n Judge looks troubled. There is a stir in the courtroom.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n I understand that you have no \r\n counsel, Mr. Deeds. In fact, that \r\n you have no intention of defending \r\n any of these charges. Now, if you \r\n wish to change your mind, the \r\n hearing can be postponed.\r\n\r\n Getting no response from Longfellow, the Judge shrugs his \r\n shoulders.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. COURTROOM\r\n\r\n 268. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar is on his feet.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (addressing the \r\n court)\r\n —and in the interests of my client, \r\n the only other living relative of \r\n the late Martin W. Semple, we cannot \r\n permit a fortune so huge to be \r\n dissipated by a person whose \r\n incompetency and abnormality we \r\n shall prove beyond any reasonable \r\n doubt.\r\n\r\n 269. PANNING SHOT OF SPECTATORS\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n I have before me a series of \r\n articles written by a newspaper \r\n woman who was an eye-witness to \r\n his conduct ever since he came to \r\n New York.\r\n\r\n CAMERA STOPS on Babe and Mac. Cedar's voice goes on:\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n She tells how, in the midst of a \r\n normal conversation, he would \r\n suddenly begin playing his tuba. \r\n She tells of his attacks upon \r\n several of our eminent writers - \r\n for no apparent reason. In fact, \r\n there are many instances not \r\n recorded in these articles in which \r\n Mr. Deeds satisfied an unnatural \r\n desire to smash people up without \r\n provocation.\r\n\r\n 270. MED. SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I, myself, unable to keep pace \r\n with his mental quirks, and \r\n constantly fearful of assault, \r\n turned down an opportunity to \r\n represent him as his attorney. \r\n This newspaper woman, whom we have \r\n subpoenaed to testify, tells how \r\n he tied up traffic for an hour \r\n feeding doughnuts to a poor horse. \r\n And by his own statement, waiting \r\n for that horse to ask for a cup of \r\n coffee.\r\n\r\n There is laughter in the courtroom - which quickly subsides \r\n when the Judge pounds his gavel.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We have photographs to substantiate \r\n this little episode, and other \r\n photographs showing Mr. Deeds \r\n jumping upon a fire engine. This \r\n scarcely sounds like the action of \r\n a man in whom the disposition of \r\n twenty million dollars may safely \r\n be entrusted. This writer of these \r\n articles - a woman whose \r\n intelligence and integrity in the \r\n newspaper world is unquestioned - \r\n held him in such contempt that she \r\n quite aptly named him \"The \r\n Cinderella Man.\"\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n We have witnesses here from Mandrake \r\n Falls, his own home town, who will \r\n tell of his conduct throughout his \r\n lifetime, proving that his \r\n derangement is neither recent nor \r\n a temporary one.\r\n\r\n Longfellow's interest is only slightly aroused. He lifts \r\n his eyes in a casual glance around him.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring Cedar.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n We have others who will tell of \r\n his unusual behavior when he invited \r\n the great leaders of the musical \r\n world to his home, and then \r\n proceeded to forcibly eject them. \r\n Only recently when he was in the \r\n County Hospital for observation, \r\n he not only refused to be examined \r\n by these gentlemen, the state \r\n psychiatrists, but he actually \r\n made a violent attack upon them.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE JUDGE\r\n\r\n As Cedar continues talking, CAMERA PULLS BACK to WIDER \r\n SHOT.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n In these times, with the country \r\n incapacitated by economic ailments, \r\n and endangered with an undercurrent \r\n of social unrest, the promulgation \r\n of such a weird, fantastic and \r\n impractical plan as contemplated \r\n by the defendant, is capable of \r\n fomenting a disturbance from which \r\n the country may not soon recover. \r\n It is our duty to stop it! Our \r\n government is fully aware of its \r\n difficulties and can pull itself \r\n out of its economic rut without \r\n the assistance of Mr. Deeds, or \r\n any other crackpot.\r\n\r\n MED. PANNING SHOT\r\n\r\n Of farmers, the Swede and others.\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n His attempted action must therefore \r\n be attributed to a diseased mind \r\n afflicted with hallucinations of \r\n grandeur, and obsessed with an \r\n insane desire to become a public \r\n benefactor.\r\n\r\n 275. CLOSE SHOT AT FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Featuring Cedar.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (suddenly)\r\n Your Honor, at this time, we would \r\n like to call our first witness: \r\n Miss Louise - Babe - Bennett.\r\n\r\n 276. FULL SHOT\r\n There is a mild stir, and all wait \r\n expectantly for Babe to appear.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Miss Bennett, please.\r\n\r\n Babe, eyes on Longfellow, slowly walks to the stand.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He has his face averted and doesn't look at her.\r\n\r\n 278. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Babe continues to rivet her eyes on Longfellow, as she is \r\n sworn in.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Raise your right hand, please.\r\n\r\n She does so.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Do you solemnly swear the testimony \r\n you may give before this court to \r\n be the truth, the whole truth and \r\n nothing but the truth, so help you \r\n God?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I do.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n State your right name, please.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Louise Bennett.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Take the stand.\r\n\r\n 279. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n As Cedar steps up to question Babe. Judge in f.g.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Miss Bennett, are you employed by \r\n the Morning Mail?\r\n\r\n There is no answer. Babe continues to stare off at \r\n Longfellow, hoping he will look up. Cedar speaks to her \r\n again:\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I must ask you to direct your \r\n attention to me.\r\n\r\n But Babe's attention remains focused on Longfellow.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (appealing to Judge)\r\n Your Honor, this is ridiculous!\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Please answer the questions.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (wildly)\r\n The whole hearing's ridiculous! \r\n That man's no more insane than you \r\n are.\r\n\r\n The suddenness of her outbreak is startling. The Judge \r\n pounds his gavel.\r\n\r\n 280. WIDER ANGLE - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n The Judge pounding his gavel.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Miss Bennett please!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n This is outrageous!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (rising to stand)\r\n It's obviously a frameup! They're \r\n trying to railroad this man for \r\n the money they can get out of him!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor!\r\n\r\n The Judge pounds his gavel throughout her speech.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (highly)\r\n Young lady, another outburst like \r\n that and I shall hold you in \r\n contempt! We're not interested in \r\n your opinion of the merits of this \r\n case. You're here to testify. Sit \r\n down and answer the questions. \r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n Cedar beams victoriously.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Thank you, Your Honor. Are you \r\n employed by the Morning Mail?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (sharply)\r\n No!\r\n\r\n Cedar's eyes widen in surprise. There is a light stir.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (threateningly)\r\n You are under oath, Miss Bennett. \r\n I ask you again - are you employed \r\n by the Morning Mail?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (irritably)\r\n No! I resigned last week!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As Cedar proceeds without interruption.\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n Well, prior to that time - were \r\n you employed by the Morning Mail?\r\n\r\n BABE'S VOICE\r\n (laconically)\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n 282. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND - BABE AND CEDAR\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Were you given an assignment to \r\n follow the activities of Longfellow \r\n Deeds?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Did you subsequently write a series \r\n of articles about him?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (holding them up)\r\n Are these the articles?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Were you present when all these \r\n things took place?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Are they true!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n NO!!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n But they did take place?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n They're colored! Just to make him \r\n look silly!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n And you saw them happen?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Yes, but I—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (preemptorily)\r\n That's all, Miss Bennett.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (half shrieking)\r\n It isn't all! I'd like to explain—\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (brusquely)\r\n That's all, Miss Bennett. That's \r\n all.\r\n\r\n 283. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n A bailiff takes Babe by the arm.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF\r\n Come on, miss - come on!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (simultaneously, to \r\n Judge)\r\n Your Honor, I'd like to submit \r\n these articles as evidence.\r\n\r\n Babe struggles away from the bailiff.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (frantically)\r\n Let go of me!\r\n (steps up to Judge; \r\n wildly)\r\n What kind of hearing is this? What \r\n are you trying to do - persecute \r\n the man? He's not defending himself. \r\n Somebody's got to do it!\r\n\r\n Throughout her tirade, the Judge has been angrily pounding \r\n his gavel.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Miss Bennett, please!\r\n\r\n 284. CLOSER SHOT\r\n\r\n Featuring Babe and Judge.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I've got a right to be heard! \r\n I've attended dozens of cases like \r\n this. They're usually conducted \r\n without any formality at all. \r\n Anybody can be heard! My opinion \r\n is as good as these quack \r\n psychiatrists. I know him better \r\n than they do.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Miss Bennett, if you have quite \r\n finished, I should like to inform \r\n you that one more utterance from \r\n you and I shall place you under \r\n arrest.\r\n (leans back)\r\n I'm willing to hear anything anyone \r\n has to say - but I insist on it \r\n being done in an orderly fashion. \r\n When you have learned to show some \r\n respect for this court, you may \r\n return.\r\n (dismissing her)\r\n Until then, you'd better go back \r\n to your seat and calm down.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF\r\n This way, miss.\r\n\r\n 285. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As Babe is led away, there is another courtroom stir.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF'S VOICE\r\n Order in the court!\r\n\r\n When Babe is out of sight, the Judge turns to Longfellow.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Deeds, have you anything to \r\n say in defense of these articles?\r\n\r\n 286. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND COBB\r\n\r\n Longfellow shakes his head. Cobb glances to him helplessly.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - JUDGE\r\n\r\n He shrugs.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Deeds?\r\n (again no reply)\r\n Mark these Exhibit A for the \r\n plaintiff.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Yes, Your Honor.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n As she sits down beside Mac - who places an affectionate \r\n arm around her shoulders.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n 289. MED. SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Two old ladies are being led to the witness stand. Their \r\n eyelids flutter excitedly as they go.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He looks up, sees the old ladies and smiles at them \r\n friendily.\r\n\r\n 291. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT JUDGE'S BENCH\r\n\r\n Against the drone of the clerk, who swears witnesses in:\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n The Falkner sisters are rather \r\n timid, Your Honor, and wish to be \r\n together. If the court pleases, I \r\n will only have one of them testify.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (impatiently)\r\n Yes! Yes! Let's get on with it.\r\n\r\n Cedar turns to them.\r\n\r\n 292. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n As Cedar addresses one of the old ladies.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n What is your name, please?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Jane Falkner. This is my sister, \r\n Amy.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n (agreeing)\r\n Yes - Amy.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n I'll direct my questions to you, \r\n Miss Jane. You can answer for both. \r\n Do you know the defendant, Mr. \r\n Longfellow Deeds?\r\n\r\n The two old ladies look at each other, then in the direction \r\n in which Cedar points.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Oh yes, yes - of course we know \r\n him.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (a little nervously)\r\n How long have you known him?\r\n\r\n Jane turns to her sister, and they whisper to each other.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n (turns to Cedar)\r\n Since he was born.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Yes. Elsie Taggart was the midwife.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n He was a seven-months baby.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Thank you, that's fine. Do you see \r\n him very often?\r\n\r\n The two old ladies have their whispered conference again.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Most every day.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Sometimes twice.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (irascibly)\r\n Must we have the echo?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Suppose you just answer, Miss Jane. \r\n Now, will you tell the Court what \r\n everybody at home thinks of \r\n Longfellow Deeds?\r\n\r\n The two old ladies consult each other once more.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n They think he's pixilated.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Oh yes, pixilated.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (leaning forward)\r\n He's what?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (concerned)\r\n What was that you said he was?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Pixilated.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (patiently)\r\n Now, that's a rather strange word \r\n to use, Miss Jane. Can you tell \r\n the court exactly what it means?\r\n\r\n While the two ladies go into a huddle:\r\n\r\n 293. CLOSE SHOT - PSYCHIATRISTS\r\n\r\n As one of them speaks up.\r\n\r\n PSYCHIATRIST\r\n Perhaps I can explain, Your Honor. \r\n The word pixilated is an early \r\n American expression - derived from \r\n the word 'pixies,' meaning elves. \r\n They would say, 'The pixies had \r\n got him,' as we nowadays would say \r\n a man is 'balmy.'\r\n\r\n 294. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n The Judge nods his understanding. The Falkner sisters nod \r\n in pleasant agreement. Cedar sighs victoriously.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Is that correct?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Now tell me, why does everyone \r\n think he's - uh - pixilated? Does \r\n he do peculiar things?\r\n\r\n 295. MED. SHOT TOWARD WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n (after conferring \r\n with Amy)\r\n He walks in the rain, without his \r\n hat, and talks to himself.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Sometimes he whistles.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n And sings.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Anything else?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Recently he gave Chuck Dillon a \r\n thumping.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Blacked his eye.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n And why?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n For no reason, I guess. He always \r\n does it. We always run into the \r\n house when we see him coming.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Never can tell what he's going to \r\n do.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n He sure is pixilated.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Oh, yes - he's pixilated all right.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Thank you, ladies. That's all.\r\n\r\n Cedar beams. The old ladies leave to resume their seats.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n 296. CLOSE SHOT IN WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n A policeman in uniform.\r\n\r\n POLICEMAN\r\n They kept hollering: \"Back to \r\n Nature! Back to Nature!\" I thought \r\n they looked harmless enough so I \r\n took them home. I never thought he \r\n was cracked.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n 297. CLOSE SHOT IN WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n The waiter at \"Tullio's.\"\r\n\r\n WAITER\r\n I'm a waiter. He kept pressing me \r\n to point out the celebrities, and \r\n so help me Hannah I'm coming out \r\n of the kitchen a coupla minutes \r\n later and there he is moppin' up \r\n the floors with them. I never \r\n figured he was a guy looking for \r\n trouble.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n 298. CLOSE SHOT IN WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n Mme. Pomponi.\r\n\r\n MME. POMPONI\r\n (expostulating)\r\n He threw us out bodily! But bodily!\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n 299. MED. CLOSE SHOT IN WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n Of one of the bodyguards on witness stand.\r\n\r\n BODYGUARD\r\n We was hired as his bodyguard, \r\n see? Well, the first crack out of \r\n the box, he throws us in a room \r\n and locks the door, see? Now, if a \r\n thing like that gets around in our \r\n profession, we'd get the bird - \r\n see? So I says to my partner, \"Let's \r\n quit this guy, he's nuts!\"\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n 300. CLOSE SHOT IN WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n A Cockney cabman.\r\n\r\n CABMAN\r\n I'm very fond of Clara, sir. She's \r\n a nice 'orse. And when this bloke \r\n 'ere started feedin' 'er doughnuts, \r\n I yelled down to him, \"Mind what \r\n you're doin' down there! Mind what \r\n you're doing'!\" Of course I wouldn't \r\n mind, sir, but Clara won't eat \r\n nothin' but doughnuts, now.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n 301. WIDE SHOT[13]\r\n\r\n Of one of the photographers (Bob) and enlarged photographs \r\n of Longfellow's antics.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF'S VOICE\r\n Come to order.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, I wish to call your \r\n attention to these exhibits. Mr. \r\n Davis, do you recognize these \r\n reproductions?\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Sure, they're good enlargements. \r\n Where'd you have them made?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Did you make the originals of them?\r\n\r\n BOB\r\n Sure. I took the originals. Taking \r\n pictures is my business. I \r\n photograph a lot of nuts.\r\n\r\n WIPE OFF TO:\r\n\r\n As Cedar speaks.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n And now, Your Honor, if the court \r\n pleases, I shall call upon Dr. \r\n Emil Von Holler, if he will be \r\n good enough to give us his opinion. \r\n Dr. Von Holler, as you know, is \r\n the eminent Austrian psychiatrist - \r\n probably the greatest authority on \r\n the subject in the world. At present \r\n he is in this country on a lecture \r\n tour, and has graciously volunteered \r\n his services. Dr. Von Holler?\r\n\r\n While he is still speaking,\r\n\r\n VOICE OF BAILIFF\r\n Dr. Von Holler!\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n 302. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As the clerk finishes swearing Dr. Von Holler in.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Do you solemnly swear the testimony \r\n you are about to give in the cause \r\n now pending before this court shall \r\n be the truth, the whole truth and \r\n nothing but the truth, so help you \r\n God? State your right name, please.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n (a slight Austrian \r\n accent)\r\n Emil Von Holler.\r\n\r\n CLERK\r\n Take the stand.\r\n\r\n 303. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n On Von Holler and Cedar.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Now Dr. Von Holler, will you kindly \r\n tell the court what your opinion \r\n is on this case?\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n This is purely a case of manic \r\n depression. In cases of this kind, \r\n patients sometimes go on for years \r\n before being detected.\r\n\r\n He turns to one of the psychiatrists, sitting with the \r\n Judge.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n You remember, Dr. Fosdick, in my \r\n last book there are some very fine \r\n examples.\r\n\r\n DR. FOSDICK\r\n (nodding)\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n Especially, the one of the young \r\n nobleman, you remember?\r\n\r\n DR. FOSDICK\r\n Oh, yes. Yes, of course Dr. Von \r\n Holler. Very interesting.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n It reminds me very much of this \r\n one. Nicht wahr?\r\n\r\n DR. FOSDICK\r\n Ja.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n It takes so long to detect them—\r\n (to Judge)\r\n —because their mood changes so \r\n often and so quickly. Now, Your \r\n Honor, may I show you? May I use \r\n the chart?\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n By all means.\r\n\r\n He moves to a blackboard. There are chalk marks on it. A \r\n straight line runs diagonally across the center. Other \r\n lines run zig-zag over and below this center line.\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n (indicating chart)\r\n Below here, they are extremely \r\n depressed, melancholy, impossible \r\n to live with, and often become \r\n violent.\r\n (running a line up)\r\n From this mood the manic depressive \r\n might gradually change until they \r\n reach this state.\r\n (he reaches the \r\n center line)\r\n Here is lucidity. Here they are \r\n perfectly normal. As normal as you \r\n or I—\r\n (smiling)\r\n —assuming, of course, that we are \r\n normal.\r\n (he starts up with \r\n chalk)\r\n Then, the mood changes again until—\r\n (chalk reaches top)\r\n —they reach this state, a state of \r\n highest exaltation. Here everything \r\n is fine. Here the world is \r\n beautiful. Here they are so elated - \r\n how do you express it?\r\n (quickly, as it \r\n comes to him)\r\n —they would give you the shirt off \r\n their backs!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Dr. Von Holler, how would you say \r\n that applied to Mr. Deeds's case?\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n The symptoms are obvious.\r\n (points to top line)\r\n When he was here, on top of the \r\n wave, he felt nothing but kindliness \r\n and warmth toward his fellow-men. \r\n He wanted them around him. So he \r\n decided he would give a big \r\n reception. But in the meantime, \r\n his mood has changed.\r\n (chalk goes down)\r\n He is now at the bottom of the \r\n wave - depressed - melancholy. So, \r\n when his guests arrive, he throws \r\n them out. They are now his imaginary \r\n enemies.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As Von Holler's voice continues:\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER'S VOICE\r\n Other instances of high elation \r\n are when he plays his tuba, when \r\n he writes his poetry, when he chases \r\n fire engines in his desire to help \r\n humanity. This is contrasted with \r\n his present mood, which is so low \r\n that even the instinct for self-\r\n preservation is lacking.\r\n\r\n 305. MED. SHOT FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER STILL CONTINUES:\r\n\r\n VON HOLLER\r\n Oh, the man is verrukt. Your Honor, \r\n this is decidedly a case of a manic \r\n depressive.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Thank you, Dr. Von Holler.\r\n\r\n Dr. Von Holler returns to his seat.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, we rest.\r\n\r\n FULL SHOT - COURTROOM\r\n\r\n There is a shifting of bodies, and a renewed interest, as \r\n they wait for the next move. The Judge and his own two \r\n experts go into an inaudible huddle.\r\n\r\n 307. CLOSE SHOT - COBB AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n Longfellow is slumped in his seat, head down.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Come on, what're you going to do? \r\n Let them get away with it? They \r\n got you cooked.\r\n\r\n Longfellow does not budge.\r\n\r\n There is an expectant stir in the courtroom among the \r\n spectators and rows of reporters.\r\n\r\n 308. MED. CLOSE SHOT - THE JUDGE AND HIS EXHIBITS\r\n\r\n Judge comes out of his huddle and glances at Longfellow.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (leaning forward)\r\n Mr. Deeds, before the court arrives \r\n at a decision, isn't there anything \r\n you wish to say?\r\n\r\n 309. CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW AND COBB\r\n\r\n Longfellow shakes his head slightly.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n (whispering)\r\n Come on - don't be a sap!\r\n\r\n CONTINUATION SCENE 308\r\n\r\n The Judge watches him a few moments, hesitatingly, and \r\n then turns to his experts.\r\n\r\n 310. MED. SHOT - NEWSPAPER REPORTERS\r\n\r\n A REPORTER\r\n He's sunk.\r\n\r\n 311. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND HIS CLIENTS, ASSISTANTS ETC.\r\n\r\n They smirk confidently.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND MAC\r\n\r\n She stares, panic-stricken.\r\n\r\n 313. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Of the Swede, the farmer, and others. Their faces show \r\n their resentment.\r\n\r\n 314. MED. SHOT FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (to the two experts)\r\n You both concur?\r\n\r\n EXPERTS\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Oh, positively.\r\n\r\n The Judge emerges from his consultation with his experts \r\n and addresses Longfellow.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Deeds, in view of the extensive \r\n testimony and your continued silence \r\n and upon recommendation of the \r\n doctors, the Court considers it \r\n advisable for your own safety that \r\n you be committed to an institution \r\n as prescribed by law. You need \r\n medical attention, Mr. Deeds.\r\n (shrugs)\r\n Perhaps in a little while—\r\n\r\n Suddenly the air is rent with the shrill voice of Babe.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n No! No! No! Wait a minute!\r\n\r\n All are startled and look up. Babe runs right to the Judge.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n You can't do it! You've got to \r\n make him talk.\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n Your Honor, I object!\r\n\r\n She turns directly to Longfellow - leaning over close to \r\n him.\r\n\r\n 315. CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (pleading softly)\r\n Oh, darling, please. I know \r\n everything I've done. I know how \r\n horrible I've been. No matter what \r\n happens, if you never see me again, \r\n do this for me.\r\n\r\n JUDGE'S VOICE\r\n Miss Bennett, please!\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (frantically)\r\n You said I could speak! You said I \r\n could have my say if I were \r\n rational. I'm rational. Please, \r\n let me take the witness chair.\r\n\r\n 316. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n He must be made to defend himself \r\n before you arrive at a decision.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Very well. Take the stand.\r\n\r\n Babe goes up to the witness stand and sits down.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Oh, thank you!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (shouting)\r\n Your Honor, what she is saying has \r\n no bearing on the case. I object.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Let her speak.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I know why he won't defend himself! \r\n That has a bearing on the case, \r\n hasn't it? He's been hurt! He's \r\n been hurt by everybody's he met \r\n since he came here, principally by \r\n me. He's been the victim of every \r\n conniving crook in town. The \r\n newspapers pounced on him - made \r\n him a target for their feeble humor.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n I was smarter than the rest of \r\n them! I got closer to him so I \r\n could laugh louder. Why shouldn't \r\n he keep quiet? Every time he said \r\n anything it was twisted around to \r\n sound imbecilic.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - BABE\r\n\r\n As she continues.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n He can thank me for it! I handed \r\n the gang a grand laugh. This is a \r\n fitting climax to my sense of humor.\r\n\r\n 319. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As Cedar protests.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n But Your Honor - this is \r\n preposterous!\r\n\r\n The Judge waves him down with a dismissing gesture of his \r\n hand.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n Certainly I wrote those articles. \r\n I was going to get a raise - and a \r\n month's vacation! But I stopped \r\n writing them when I found out what \r\n he was all about! When I realized \r\n how real he was.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As Babe's voice continues:\r\n\r\n BABE'S VOICE\r\n He could never fit in with our \r\n distorted viewpoint because he's \r\n honest and sincere - and good. If \r\n that man is crazy, Your Honor, the \r\n rest of us belong in straight-\r\n jackets.\r\n\r\n 321. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar jumps up.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, this is absurd. The \r\n woman's obviously in love with \r\n him.\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n What's that got to do with it?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (shouting)\r\n Well, you are in love with him, \r\n aren't you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (shouting back)\r\n What's that got to do with it?\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (louder)\r\n You are , aren't you?\r\n\r\n BABE\r\n (just as loud)\r\n Yes!!!\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n To be intercut during her speech. At first he merely glances \r\n up at her speculatively. Finally, he begins to show some \r\n interest.\r\n\r\n 323. MED. SHOT FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Cedar turns to the Judge.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, her testimony is of no \r\n value. Why shouldn't she defend \r\n him? It's a tribute to American \r\n womanhood - the instinct to protect \r\n the weak. I'm not saying that nobody \r\n likes the boy. I cherish a fond \r\n affection for him myself. But that \r\n doesn't mean to say—In the middle \r\n of his speech, Mac - the editor - \r\n appears at his elbow.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n When the windbag here gets through, \r\n Your Honor, I'd like to verify \r\n what Miss Bennett said. I'm her \r\n editor. When she quit her job, she \r\n told me what a swell fellow this \r\n man was. And anything Babe Bennett \r\n says is okay with me.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n If you have anything to say, you \r\n will take the stand.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n I've already said it, Your Honor. \r\n I just thought I'd like to get my \r\n two cents in.\r\n\r\n As he starts to go, CAMERA PANNING WITH HIM, he passes \r\n Longfellow. He nudges him.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Don't be a sucker, pal. Stand up \r\n and speak your piece.\r\n\r\n He disappears to his seat.\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n Your Honor, I've got a couple of \r\n cents I'd like to put in—\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Sit down!\r\n\r\n COBB\r\n I've been with this man ever since \r\n he came to New York—\r\n\r\n 324. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Shooting toward the Judge. He pounds his gavel, interrupting \r\n Cobb.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Sit down! There will be no further \r\n interruptions.\r\n\r\n Almost simultaneously with the Judge's speech, the farmer, \r\n somewhere in the audience, rises to his feet.\r\n\r\n FARMER\r\n How about us, Mr. Deeds!\r\n\r\n 325. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n Shooting toward audience. As the farmer finishes, a dozen \r\n others are on their feet.\r\n\r\n CROWD\r\n (ad-lib)\r\n Yes! What about us, Mr. Deeds!\r\n You're not going to leave us out \r\n in the cold!\r\n They're trying to frame you, Mr. \r\n Deeds!\r\n\r\n The turmoil is general, with bailiffs running to quiet \r\n them. The Judge pounding his gavel, incensed.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF'S VOICE\r\n Order! Order!\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (when quiet reigns)\r\n In the interest of Mr. Deeds, I \r\n have tolerated a great deal of \r\n informality. But if there is one \r\n more outburst, I shall have the \r\n courtroom cleared.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Your Honor—\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (surprised)\r\n Yes?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n I'd like to get in my two cents' \r\n worth.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Take the stand!\r\n\r\n There is a general stir of excitement - and whispering.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n Her eyes sparkle happily.\r\n\r\n 327. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND CLIENTS\r\n\r\n The clients look up at Cedar, concerned. Cedar comforts \r\n them with a confident grimace.\r\n\r\n 328. MED. SHOT\r\n\r\n To include Longfellow, Judge, and others around them. \r\n Longfellow hesitates.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Well, I don't know where to begin. \r\n There's been so many things said \r\n about me that I—\r\n\r\n 329. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW CONTINUES:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n About my playing the tuba. Seems \r\n like a lot of fuss has been made \r\n about that. If a man's crazy just \r\n 'cause he plays the tuba, then \r\n somebody better look into it, 'cause \r\n there are a lot of tuba players \r\n running around loose. Of course, I \r\n don't see any harm in it. I play \r\n mine whenever I want to concentrate. \r\n That may sound funny to some people - \r\n but everybody does something silly \r\n when they're thinking. For instance, \r\n the Judge here is an O-filler. . .\r\n\r\n 330. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n Front of courtroom.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n A what?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n An O-filler. You fill in all the \r\n spaces in the O's, with your pencil.\r\n (points to desk)\r\n I was watching you.\r\n\r\n The Judge looks down at a paper in front of him.\r\n\r\n INSERT: OF A PRINTED DOCUMENT\r\n\r\n Of some sort. All the O's and P's and R's have the white \r\n spaces pencilled in.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - JUDGE\r\n\r\n As he looks up from the document. He is a trifle self-\r\n conscious. Laughter comes from the courtroom.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n That may make you look a little \r\n crazy, Your Honor, just sitting \r\n around filling in O's - but I don't \r\n see anything wrong 'cause that \r\n helps you to think. Other people \r\n are doodlers.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Doodlers?\r\n\r\n 332. MED. SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n That's a name we made up back home \r\n for people who make foolish designs \r\n on paper when they're thinking. \r\n It's called doodling. Almost \r\n everybody's a doodler. Did you \r\n ever see a scratch pad in a \r\n telephone booth? People draw the \r\n most idiotic pictures when they're \r\n thinking. Dr. Von Holler, here, \r\n could probably think up a long \r\n name for it, because he doodles \r\n all the time.\r\n\r\n Dr. Von Holler, who is in the middle of some doodling, \r\n flinches. A roar of laughter comes from the spectators. \r\n Longfellow reaches over to where Dr. Von Holler sits and \r\n picks up a piece of paper.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (to Dr. Von Holler)\r\n Thank you.\r\n (returning to the \r\n stand)\r\n This is a piece of paper he was \r\n scribbling on.\r\n (scrutinizes it)\r\n I can't figure it out. One minute \r\n it looks like a chimpanzee - and \r\n the next minute it looks like a \r\n picture of Mr. Cedar.\r\n (hands it to him)\r\n You look at it, Judge.\r\n\r\n The Judge, with a serious mien, takes the paper.\r\n\r\n INSERT: OF PAPER\r\n\r\n It is a doodle face.\r\n\r\n BACK TO SCENE:\r\n\r\n Dr. Von Holler is somewhat uncomfortable.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Exhibit A - for the defense.\r\n (after a pause)\r\n Looks kind of stupid, doesn't it, \r\n Your Honor? But I guess that's all \r\n right if Dr. Von Holler has to \r\n doodle to help him think. That's \r\n his business. Everybody does \r\n something different. Some people \r\n are—\r\n (demonstrates)\r\n ear-pullers - some are nail-biters—\r\n (pointing)\r\n That Mr. Semple over there is a \r\n nose-twitcher.\r\n\r\n 333. CLOSE SHOT - SEMPLE AND HIS WIFE\r\n\r\n He looks up, startled, his nose twitching more violently \r\n than ever. The courtroom rocks with laughter.\r\n\r\n His wife, in her nervousness, pulls at her fingers.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n And the lady next to him is a \r\n knuckle-cracker.\r\n\r\n Mrs. Semple quickly drops her hands in her lap, as the \r\n courtroom again fills with laughter.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - COBB\r\n\r\n He swings a key-ring around his forefinger. Suddenly he \r\n realizes Longfellow might get to him, and he hastily palms \r\n the keys and shoves them in his pocket.\r\n\r\n 335. MED. CLOSE SHOT - NEWSPAPER REPORTERS\r\n\r\n One is leaning forward, listening intently - biting the \r\n end of his pencil. The one next to him nudges him and \r\n silently points to the pencil in his mouth. The reporter \r\n gets the idea and, smiling sheepishly, yanks it out of his \r\n mouth.\r\n\r\n 336. MED. CLOSE SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n So you see, everybody does silly \r\n things to help them think.\r\n (in conclusion)\r\n Well, I play the tuba.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - MAC\r\n\r\n As he bursts forth.\r\n\r\n MAC\r\n Nice work, toots!\r\n\r\n The crowd echoes him with shouts and laughter.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - JUDGE\r\n\r\n He glares off scene at Mac, reprimandingly.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n She is amused at the embarassment Longfellow has caused \r\n them all.\r\n\r\n 340. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND HIS CLIENTS\r\n\r\n They squirm uncomfortably.\r\n\r\n 341. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n Longfellow in chair - Judge at bench, b.g.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Deeds, do you recall forcibly \r\n ejecting people from your home?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh, yes. Yes. About my throwing \r\n those people out of my house. Mrs. \r\n Pomponi told the truth. I did throw \r\n them out because I didn't want the \r\n party in the first place. I didn't \r\n invite anybody. Mrs. Pomponi did \r\n all that. They just came to see \r\n what kind of a freak the \"Cinderella \r\n Man\" was. I don't know how people \r\n like that are supposed to act, \r\n Your Honor, but if that Pomponi \r\n woman is an example, I'll stick to \r\n simple folks. She just came in, \r\n talked my ear off, and took charge \r\n of everything. If I were a friend \r\n of hers, I'd have her examined.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Featuring Longfellow. Cedar, who cannot stand it any longer, \r\n jumps to his feet.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, this is becoming \r\n farcical. I demand that Mr. Deeds \r\n dispense with side remarks and \r\n confine himself to facts! Let him \r\n explain his wanderings around the \r\n streets in underclothes, his feeding \r\n doughnuts to horses!\r\n\r\n JUDGE'S VOICE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Mr. Cedar's right. Those things do \r\n look kind of bad, don't they? But \r\n to tell the truth, Your Honor, I \r\n don't remember them. I guess they \r\n happened, all right, because I \r\n don't think a policeman would lie \r\n about a thing like that, but I was \r\n drunk. It was the first time I was \r\n ever drunk in my life. It's probably \r\n happened to you, some time. I mean, \r\n when you were younger, of course.\r\n\r\n The Judge clears his throat in embarrassment. Several women \r\n giggle. The Judge sternly pounds his gavel.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n It's likely to happen to anybody. \r\n Just the other morning I read in \r\n the paper about Mr. Cedar's own \r\n son - about how he got drunk and \r\n insisted on driving a taxi-cab, \r\n while the driver sat inside. Isn't \r\n that so, Mr. Cedar? Isn't that so \r\n , Mr. Cedar?\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n All eyes have turned to Cedar.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR\r\n\r\n His eyes are beginning to blaze angrily.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Your Honor, I object.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n 346. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now about the Falkner sisters. \r\n That's kind of funny. I mean about \r\n Mr. Cedar going all the way to \r\n Mandrake Falls to bring them here. \r\n Do you mind if I talk to them?\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Not at all.\r\n\r\n Longfellow turns. Everybody stretches to get a better look \r\n at them.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Jane, who owns the house you live \r\n in?\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - THE SISTERS\r\n\r\n The girls consult with each other.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Why, you own it, Longfellow.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Yes, you own it.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n Do you pay any rent?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n (after conferring \r\n with Amy)\r\n No, we don't pay any rent.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Good heavens, no! We never pay \r\n rent.\r\n\r\n 348. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n As Longfellow continues questioning:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Are you happy there?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Oh, yes.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Yes, indeed.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now, Jane, a little while ago you \r\n said I was pixilated. Do you still \r\n think so?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n (after the usual \r\n conference)\r\n Why, you've always been pixilated, \r\n Longfellow.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Always.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (smiling)\r\n That's fine. I guess maybe I am.\r\n (seriously)\r\n Now tell me something, Jane. Who \r\n else in Mandrake Falls is pixilated?\r\n\r\n Jane turns to her sister and this time they go into a \r\n prolonged huddle. It is apparently a difficult thing to \r\n figure out. Finally they come out of it.\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n Why, everybody in Mandrake Falls \r\n in pixilated - except us.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT OF SPECTATORS\r\n\r\n There is an outburst of laughter which the Judge quickly \r\n quells with his gavel.\r\n\r\n 350. MED. SHOT - DIFFERENT ANGLE\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now, just one more question. Do \r\n you see the Judge here? He's a \r\n nice man, isn't he?\r\n\r\n JANE & AMY\r\n Uh-huh.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Do you think he's pixilated?\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n (quickly)\r\n Oh, yes.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n Yes, indeedy.\r\n\r\n There is more laughter. More pounding of the judiciary \r\n gavel.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR\r\n\r\n He feels his case slowly crumbling.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n She can scarcely conceal her elation.\r\n\r\n 353. MED. SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Deeds, you haven't yet touched \r\n upon a most important thing. This \r\n rather fantastic idea of yours to \r\n want to give away your entire \r\n fortune. It is, to say the least, \r\n most uncommon.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Oh yes, I was getting to that, \r\n Your Honor.\r\n\r\n CAMERA MOVES TO CLOSER SHOT, featuring Longfellow and Judge, \r\n as former continues:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Suppose you were living in a small \r\n town and getting along fine, and \r\n suddenly somebody dropped \r\n $20,000,000 in your lap. Supposing \r\n you discovered that all that money \r\n was messing up your life, was \r\n bringing a lot of vultures around \r\n your neck, and making you lose \r\n faith in everybody. You'd be a \r\n little worried, wouldn't you? You'd \r\n feel that you had a hot potato in \r\n your hand, and you'd want to drop \r\n it. I guess Dr. Von Holler would \r\n say you were riding on—\r\n (points to chart)\r\n —those bottom waves, 'cause you \r\n wanted to drop something that was \r\n burning your fingers.\r\n\r\n 354. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n Cedar springs to his feet.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n (shouting)\r\n If this man is permitted to carry \r\n out his plan, repercussions will \r\n be felt that will rock the \r\n foundations of our entire \r\n governmental system!\r\n\r\n The Judge has pounded him into silence.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Please, Mr. Cedar!\r\n (to Longfellow)\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n 355. MED. CLOSE SHOT AT WITNESS STAND\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Personally, I don't know what Mr. \r\n Cedar's raving about. From what I \r\n can see, no matter what system of \r\n government we have, there will \r\n always be leaders and always be \r\n followers.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n Farmers in audience, as Longfellow's voice continues:\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW'S VOICE\r\n It's like the road out in front of \r\n my house. It's on a steep hill. \r\n Every day I watch the cars climbing \r\n up. Some go lickety-split up that \r\n hill on high—\r\n\r\n 357. FULL SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n —some have to shift into second - \r\n and some sputter and shake and \r\n slip back to the bottom again. \r\n Same cars - same gasoline - yet \r\n some make it and some don't. And I \r\n say the fellows who can make the \r\n hill on high should stop once in a \r\n while and help those who can't.\r\n\r\n 358. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (making his point)\r\n That's all I'm trying to do with \r\n this money. Help the fellows who \r\n can't make the hill on high.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (hotly)\r\n What does Mr. Cedar expect me to \r\n do with it? Give it to him - and a \r\n lot of other people who don't need \r\n it?\r\n (rising; \r\n sarcastically)\r\n If you don't mind, Your Honor, \r\n I'll ride on those top waves for a \r\n minute.\r\n (calls out)\r\n Hey, all you fellows out there! \r\n All those who applied for a farm, \r\n stand up!\r\n\r\n 360. REVERSE ANGLE\r\n\r\n Showing most of the audience struggling to their feet.\r\n\r\n 361. MED. CLOSE SHOT - WITNESS CHAIR\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n See all those fellows? They're \r\n the ones I'm trying to help. They \r\n need it!\r\n (pointing)\r\n Mr. Cedar and that Mr. Semple don't \r\n need anything. They've got plenty! \r\n It's like I'm out in a big boat \r\n and I see one fellow in a rowboat \r\n who's tired of rowing and wants a \r\n free ride - and another fellow \r\n who's drowning. Who would you expect \r\n me to rescue? Mr. Cedar, who just \r\n got tired of rowing and wants a \r\n free ride? Or those men out there \r\n who are drowning? Any ten-year-\r\n old child will give you the answer \r\n to that.\r\n (to farmers etc. in \r\n courtroom)\r\n All right, fellows. Thank you. Sit \r\n down.\r\n\r\n 362. MEDIUM SHOT - FRONT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Now, my plan is very simple. I was \r\n going to give each family ten acres - \r\n a horse, a cow and some seed. And \r\n if they work the farm for three \r\n years, it's theirs. Now, if that's \r\n crazy, maybe I ought to be sent to \r\n an institution. But I don't think \r\n it is. And what's more, Mr. Cedar \r\n doesn't either.\r\n (vehemently)\r\n Just before the hearing started, \r\n he offered to call the whole thing \r\n off if I made a settlement with \r\n him. So you see, he wouldn't think \r\n I was crazy if he got paid off.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR\r\n\r\n He jumps to his feet, highly incensed.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n It's a lie!\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Cedar!\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n Mr. Deeds is drawing on his warped \r\n imagination!\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n As he listens to Cedar, watching him antagonistically.\r\n\r\n CEDAR'S VOICE\r\n I've never heard anything so \r\n colossally stupid in my life!\r\n\r\n Longfellow's eyes narrow resentfully.\r\n\r\n 365. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n To include Longfellow, Cedar and Judge.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n It's an insult to our intelligence \r\n to sit here and listen to his \r\n childish ravings.\r\n\r\n Throughout his speech the Judge has been pounding his gavel. \r\n Longfellow has his eyes levelled off on Cedar.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (when quiet reigns)\r\n You will please permit Mr. Deeds \r\n to finish.\r\n\r\n CEDAR\r\n But your honor—\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Mr. Cedar!\r\n\r\n Cedar, grumblingly, remains standing. Judge asks Longfellow:\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Anything else, Mr. Deeds?\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n (eyes still on Cedar)\r\n No.\r\n (changes his mind; \r\n turns to Judge)\r\n Yes. There's just one more thing \r\n I'd like to get off my chest before \r\n I finish.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Proceed.\r\n\r\n LONGFELLOW\r\n Thank you, Your Honor.\r\n\r\n He rises to his feet, takes one step forward, and clouts \r\n Cedar flush on the jaw. As Cedar falls into the arms of an \r\n associate, pandemonium breaks loose.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF'S VOICE\r\n Order! Order! Order in the court!\r\n\r\n FULL SHOT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n THE JUDGE POUNDS HIS GAVEL. THERE ARE CRIES OF APPROVAL \r\n FROM THE SPECTATORS. IN THE MIDST OF THE COMMOTION—\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. COURTROOM\r\n\r\n MED. PANNING SHOT\r\n\r\n Showing spectators, waiting breathlessly for a decision. \r\n All eyes are on the Judge.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT AT BENCH\r\n\r\n The Judge holds a whispered conversation with his experts.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n She is apprehensive.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n He glances furtively at Babe, off scene.\r\n\r\n MED. SHOT OF FARMERS\r\n\r\n Leaning forward. Their entire future hangs in the balance.\r\n\r\n MED. CLOSE SHOT AT BENCH\r\n\r\n The Judge comes out of the huddle; his face is very stern.\r\n\r\n BAILIFF'S VOICE\r\n Remain seated and come to order. \r\n The Court is again in session.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n Before the Court announces its \r\n decision, I want to warn all who \r\n are here that the police have orders \r\n to arrest anyone creating a \r\n disturbance.\r\n\r\n 373. QUICK FLASHES\r\n\r\n Of Babe - Cobb - Longfellow - Mac - the farmers.\r\n\r\n 374. INSERT: CLOSE SHOT - JUDGE\r\n\r\n The Judge's preface augurs ill.\r\n\r\n CLOSEUP - CEDAR\r\n\r\n His mouth curls up in a contented grimace.\r\n\r\n FULL SHOT - COURTROOM\r\n\r\n All eyes are upon the Judge, who clears his throat.\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n (serious mien)\r\n Mr. Deeds, there has been a great \r\n deal of damaging testimony against \r\n you. Your behavior, to say the \r\n least, has been most strange.\r\n\r\n An audible gasp is heard from audience. Judge goes on:\r\n\r\n JUDGE\r\n But in the opinion of the Court, \r\n you are not only sane, but you are \r\n the sanest man that ever walked \r\n into this courtroom. Case dismissed!\r\n\r\n The shout that greets this is tumultuous. The Judge smiles \r\n warmly, and clasps Longfellow's hand. Immediately, \r\n Longfellow is surrounded by a crowd of people who come \r\n running down the aisles.\r\n\r\n 377. CLOSE SHOT - CEDAR AND GROUP\r\n\r\n They sit, stunned, disappointed. Mrs. Semple turns to her \r\n husband and slaps him.\r\n\r\n MRS. SEMPLE\r\n You nose-twitcher!\r\n\r\n Budington rises to confront Cedar.\r\n\r\n BUDINGTON\r\n Oh, I knew it! I knew it! You, \r\n you—\r\n\r\n Cedar disgustedly pushes him in the face, aside.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n She smiles ecstatically, too excited to move. Suddenly she \r\n rises.\r\n\r\n 379. MEDIUM SHOT\r\n\r\n As Babe tries to get to Longfellow, but finds herself on \r\n the fringe of a jubilant crowd in the center of which is \r\n Longfellow. She tries to break through, but finds it \r\n impossible. Desperately, she jumps on a chair and tries \r\n frantically to get a glimpse of him. At that moment, several \r\n farmers have lifted Longfellow on their shoulders.\r\n\r\n FULL SHOT - COURTROOM\r\n\r\n As jubilantly, Longfellow is carried out on the shoulders \r\n of the excited crowd.\r\n\r\n MEDIUM CLOSE SHOT\r\n\r\n As Babe frantically tries to reach Longfellow, but is \r\n jostled aside. The parade envelops her.\r\n\r\n LONG SHOT FROM REAR\r\n\r\n The shouting mob is heading for the door at end of \r\n courtroom. Everyone crowds forward.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT IN REAR\r\n\r\n Babe is left helplessly out.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n FULL SHOT OF COURTROOM\r\n\r\n Empty - except for the Falkner sisters, still whispering \r\n to each other, and Babe, sitting helpless and forlorn.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - BABE\r\n\r\n Her eyes are filled. Dismally she starts forward. We hear \r\n a rising commotion from the outside, at this moment.\r\n\r\n 386. WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\n Longfellow running toward camera with the mob, shouting, \r\n back of him. He reaches courtroom, slams the doors shut \r\n behind him. Babe, attracted by the noise, looks up. He \r\n runs toward her, and swoops her up in his arms.\r\n\r\n CLOSE SHOT - JANE & AMY\r\n\r\n JANE\r\n He's still pixilated.\r\n\r\n AMY\r\n He sure is.\r\n\r\n 388. CLOSE SHOT - BABE AND LONGFELLOW\r\n\r\n She kisses him over and over again. He looks around and \r\n over his shoulder at the mob, a little dazed. Finally, he \r\n notices her effort, and gives her one passionately back.\r\n\r\n All that is heard is the cheering of the crowd outside and \r\n the Columbia music.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT:\r\n\r\n THE END\r\n"
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https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/Mr._Deeds_Goes_to_Town.html
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mrs. Brown' ?"
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"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\n\r\n\r\n\tMRS BROWN BY JEREMY BROCK\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBegin on black. The sound of rain driving into trees. \r\n\tSomething wipes frame and we are suddenly hurtling through\r\n\ta forest on the shoulders of a wild-eyed, kilted JOHN\r\n\tBROWN. Drenched hair streaming, head swivelling left and\r\n\tright, as he searches the lightening-dark. A crack to his\r\n\tleft. He spins round, raises his pistol, smacks past\r\n\tsaplings and plunges on.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tClose-up on BROWN as he bangs against a tree and heaves for\r\n\tair. A face in its fifties, mad-fierce eyes, handsome,\r\n\tbruised lips, liverish. He goes on searching the dark. \r\n\tStops. Listens through the rain. A beat. Thinking he\r\n\thears a faint thump in the distance, he swings round and\r\n\traces on.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN tears through the trees, pistol raised at full arm's\r\n\tlength, breath coming harder and harder. But even now\r\n\tthere's a ghost grace, a born hunter's grace. He leaps\r\n\tfallen branches, swerves through turns in the path, eyes\r\n\tforward, never stumbling once.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN bursts into a clearing, breaks to the centre and\r\n\tstops. With his pistol raised, he turns one full slow\r\n\tcircle. His eyes take in every swerve and kick of the\r\n\twildly swaying trees.\r\n\r\n\tThere's a crack and a branch snaps behind him. He spins\r\n\tround, bellows deep from his heart:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tGod save the Queen!!\r\n\r\n\tAnd fires.\r\n\r\n\tNothing happens. The trees go on swaying, the storm goes\r\n\ton screaming and BROWN just stands there, staring into\r\n\tempty space. A pause.\r\n\r\n\tSlowly, he starts to frown as the fact begins to dawn on\r\n\thim that he is alone. He stares at the thrashing trees,\r\n\twaving their mocking arms at him. His hand lets the pistol\r\n\tdrop to his side. He feels the rain drench down his face. \r\n\tAnd now, for the first time, we see that his socks have\r\n\tfallen to his ankles and his knees are cut to shreds. He\r\n\tshifts a foot. His dress-shoes are covered in mud. He\r\n\tgoes on staring into the dark. Nothing. \r\n\tJust the wind and rain. Gradually, we pull back, higher\r\n\tand higher. As we do, we hear the quiet cultivated voice:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"1864\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\tI have sent for a Mr. John BROWN from\r\n\t\tBalmoral. Her majesty has mentioned\r\n\t\thim, on one or two occasions, as being\r\n\t\ta most devoted outdoor servant to\r\n\t\tPrince Albert during his last days\r\n\t\tthere...\r\n\r\n\tJohn BROWN is now just a tiny figure dwarfed by the storm.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t CUT TO:\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN VICTORIA'S DRESSING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe screen is black. As the camera pulls back, we discover\r\n\tthat we are looking at a black night-gown.\r\n\r\n\tQueen VICTORIA is sitting at her dressing table, while an\r\n\telderly HAIRDRESSER, also in black, works at her hair.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... The depths of the Queen's sorrow\r\n\t\tremain impenetrable. She has now\r\n\t\trestricted herself to a regime of such\r\n\t\tferocious introspection that we are\r\n\t\tall at our wits' end...\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, PRINCE ALBERT'S DRESSING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA bust of the Prince Consort is draped in black. His desk\r\n\tis laid out as if for work. A VALET is brushing one of his\r\n\tsuits before laying it carefully on the bed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... The Household continues, at her\r\n\t\tinstruction, to observe the rituals\r\n\t\tnow so familiar to her, in a vain\r\n\t\tattempt to render vivid that which can\r\n\t\tnever be revived...\r\n\r\n\tClose-up on a small table as a shaving brush is placed\r\n\tcarefully beside a dish of freshly poured water.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN VICTORIA'S DRESSING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe hairdresser is pulling VICTORIA's hair back into the\r\n\twidow's cape. For the first time, we see her face. It is\r\n\tset in a mask of severity.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... It will not surprise you to hear\r\n\t\tthat she continues steadfast in her\r\n\t\trefusal to accept any public\r\n\t\tengagements, however trivial...\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN VICTORIA'S BEDCHAMBER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA bronze cast of Prince Albert's hand hangs above the Royal\r\n\tbed. His sleeping-gown is laid out on one side.\r\n\r\n\tA somberly dressed middle-aged man stands by the bed:\r\n\tDOCTOR JENNER, the Queen's physician. He is placing\r\n\tpotions and medicaments in a row on the bedside table.\r\n\r\n\tBehind him, TWO MAIDSERVANTS are busy stripping and\r\n\tremaking the bed while another raises the window to air the\r\n\troom.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... Family and staff expend all their\r\n\t\tefforts endeavouring to draw her out\r\n\t\tof this state of unfettered morbidity,\r\n\t\tbut to no avail. Indeed, Doctor\r\n\t\tJenner will not undertake to vouchsafe\r\n\t\ther sanity, unless some remedy is\r\n\t\tfound...\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN VICTORIA'S DRESSING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA is turning slowly around as a young ASSISTANT\r\n\tDRESSER completes the fastening on her black crepe dress.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... We must hope, therefore, that this\r\n\t\tMr Brown will appeal to the Queen's\r\n\t\tsentimental, though deeply-held, view\r\n\t\tthat all Highlanders are good for the\r\n\t\thealth. If she can at least be\r\n\t\tpersuaded to take the air, the\r\n\t\tprospect of further recovery may seem\r\n\t\tless remote...\r\n\r\n\tThe assistant dresser pulls too tightly on her dress. \r\n\tVICTORIA winces slightly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\t\t(terrified)\r\n\t\tSorry, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE SEA FRONT, ISLE OF WIGHT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tWe glide slowly past the coastline as a caption reads:\r\n\t\"ISLE OF WIGHT. 1864.\"\r\n\r\n\tA DRIVER stands against the sea front with a horse and cart\r\n\tbearing the Royal coat of arms.\r\n\r\n\tJohn BROWN leads his pony along the dockside, towards the\r\n\twaiting driver. He is in his late thirties, fit, handsome\r\n\tand dressed in tartan kilt and short jacket.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... He is arriving by boat this\r\n\t\tafternoon, by which time it is hoped\r\n\t\tHer Majesty will be in a fit state to\r\n\t\tconsider riding out...\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, PRIVATE SECRETARY'S ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tSIR HENRY PONSONBY, the Queen's Private Secretary, is\r\n\tsitting at his writing desk, completing a letter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (V.O.)\r\n\t\t... As to that decision, along with\r\n\t\tall others, we remain, as ever,\r\n\t\tprisoners of the Queen's grief.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tEver your devoted husband, Henry.\r\n\r\n\tHe folds the letter and slips it into an envelope. He is a\r\n\tmiddle-aged man in a dark mourning suit; tall, Saturnine\r\n\tand with a civil servant's stoop. As he looks up, we see a\r\n\twhite-stockinged FOOTMAN standing to attention by the door. \r\n\tPONSONBY hands the letter to him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWindsor.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t CUT TO:\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"OSBORNE HOUSE, ISLE OF WIGHT\"\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, CORRIDOR AND QUEEN'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA series of windows are being slammed open by white\r\n\tstockinged FOOTMEN as members of the ROYAL FAMILY and UPPER\r\n\tHOUSEHOLD hurry by in silence, all dressed in mourning and\r\n\trushing to make the luncheon hour.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN'S DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tQueen VICTORIA heads down the empty corridor with two\r\n\tladies-in-waiting, LADY ELY and LADY CHURCHILL, hurrying\r\n\talong a pace behind.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tMembers of the Royal family and upper household hurry into\r\n\tthe icy dining room and take their designated places at the\r\n\tluncheon table. Everybody is dressed in mourning and\r\n\tnobody speaks. Wind whistles through the open windows. \r\n\tSilence.\r\n\r\n\tAmong the diners we catch our first glimpse of BERTIE, the\r\n\tPrince of Wales. He is in his mid-twenties, plump, stiff\r\n\tdressed and balding. He stands next to his young wife,\r\n\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA, who fiddles nervously with her shawl,\r\n\ttrying to keep warm.\r\n\r\n\tAs BERTIE smooths down his thinning hair, DOCTOR JENNER\r\n\tbustles into the dining room, stands himself next to\r\n\tPONSONBY and proceeds to conduct a hurried conversation\r\n\twith the Prince of Wales, entirely in whispers.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tCongratulations, Your Royal Highness!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tThank you, Doctor.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tA boy, I hear. Excellent, excellent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tAlbert Victor. Eddie for short. What\r\n\t\tdo you think?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tA fine choice, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tExcellent!\r\n\r\n\tEXT. DOCKSIDE, ISLE OF WIGHT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tJOHN BROWN leads his pony gently up the ramp and into the\r\n\tcarrier bearing the Royal coat of arms. The DRIVER leans\r\n\tin.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDRIVER\r\n\t\tAre you riding up front?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN looks straight at this man, quiet and reserved.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'll stay with the pony, thank you. \r\n\t\tShe's all the way from Deeside and\r\n\t\tshe's not sure she likes you yet.\r\n\r\n\tThe DRIVER shrugs and slams the doors on them.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, CORRIDOR AND QUEEN'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA reaches the dining room door and takes a deep\r\n\tbreath. LADY ELY and LADY CHURCHILL stop a pace behind.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHow many?\r\n\r\n\tLADY ELY is slightly taken aback.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tThe Royal Family and senior members of\r\n\t\tthe household, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tJust them?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA closes her eyes, then steels herself and steps\r\n\tthrough the door.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tEveryone stiffens as VICTORIA walks in. Acknowledging the\r\n\tother diners with a quick nod, the Queen takes her place.\r\n\r\n\tShe flaps open her napkin and, bang on cue, everyone else\r\n\tsits and does the same. The meal is served immediately by\r\n\twaiting SERVANTS, who plonk the food down without ceremony.\r\n\r\n\tIt's a very ordinary meal of meat and vegetables. VICTORIA\r\n\tstarts eating heartily, straight away. Everyone does the\r\n\tsame.\r\n\r\n\tOnly the clink of cutlery and the same eerie silence.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE, THE GROUNDS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe Royal horse-carrier rattles into the grounds and on\r\n\tdown the driveway past the beautiful, manicured lawns\r\n\tstretching away towards the ornate twin towers of Osborne\r\n\tHouse. A few outdoor servants watch its progress\r\n\tcuriously.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe silence continues as VICTORIA finishes her plain\r\n\tpudding. Immediately, servants appear at every place and\r\n\twhip away the pudding bowls whether their owners have\r\n\tfinished or not. Nobody thinks this odd; it is part of the\r\n\troutine. DOCTOR JENNER clears his throat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tWe're expecting Brown this afternoon,\r\n\t\tma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhom?\r\n\r\n\tA beat. VICTORIA takes a sip of water, dabs her mouth with\r\n\ther napkin and rises. Everyone else rises too. Suddenly,\r\n\tthe Queen turns to Bertie's nervous wife, PRINCESS\r\n\tALEXANDRA, and proclaims abruptly:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tThat's a very pretty shawl you are\r\n\t\twearing, Alex. Silk suits you well.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tBut you are not eating enough. One\r\n\t\tmust not let vanity overrule one's\r\n\t\tappetite.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA nods earnestly. Lost to the effect her words have\r\n\thad, she marches out again. Behind her, she leaves\r\n\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA feeling humiliated and crestfallen in\r\n\tfront of all the others. BERTIE takes her hand and\r\n\tsqueezes tight, trying awkwardly to console.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe horse-carrier pulls up outside the servant's entrance\r\n\tand the DRIVER opens the doors.\r\n\r\n\tJOHN BROWN pulls out a watch from his waistcoat and checks\r\n\tthe time. His eyes narrow critically.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI was due at a quarter past one.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou're late.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, JOHN BROWN strides down the long\r\n\tcorridor with PONSONBY at his side. Their journey takes\r\n\tthem down an endless series of corridors, past servants and\r\n\thouseholders hurrying about their duties. The presence of\r\n\tthe dead Albert is felt all around in the black-wreathed\r\n\tportraits and busts that crop up along the way.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN and PONSONBY could not be more contrasted.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\t\t(in low tones)\r\n\t\tHer Majesty's routine at Osborne House\r\n\t\tis not as you will remember it. The\r\n\t\tHousehold remains in full mourning and\r\n\t\tno-one is permitted to raise their\r\n\t\tvoice under any circumstances\r\n\t\twhatsoever. As for the Queen's\r\n\t\troutine, she breakfasts at nine\r\n\t\tthirty, lunches at two,takes tea at\r\n\t\tfive thirty and dinner at eight forty\r\n\t\tfive. No one is allowed to leave the\r\n\t\tbuilding while the Queen is at home. \r\n\t\tOn the rare occasions when she is out,\r\n\t\tyou may ask permission to leave, but\r\n\t\tonly with my consent. \r\n\t\tYou're to be ready to walk the pony at\r\n\t\tany time after ten o'clock. You'll\r\n\t\tclean her outdoor things and do any\r\n\t\todd jobs as and when she requires.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHow will I know?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\t\t(surprised to be interrupted)\r\n\t\tI'm sorry?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHow will I know what she requires?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYou'll be sent a message.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWho'll bring it to me?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tHer Highness' Equerry.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI need a man who knows where I am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI'm sure it won't be difficult to find\r\n\t\tyou.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThat's not good enough.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThen we'll have to see what can be\r\n\t\tarranged.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye, do.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY stiffens. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThere is to be no communication with\r\n\t\tother members of the household on\r\n\t\tmatters concerning the court except\r\n\t\tthrough myself or one of the\r\n\t\tEquerries. No plans must be altered\r\n\t\tunless you are given prior authority\r\n\t\tby myself or a senior member of the\r\n\t\thousehold.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI came down at the Queen's request. \r\n\t\tI'll take my orders from her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tIn matters concerning the Household, I\r\n\t\tact on her behalf.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN takes the measure of him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tDo you?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI do.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN glances up the corridor.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSo, is passing wind out of the\r\n\t\tquestion or do I need permission for\r\n\t\tthat?\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY refuses to acknowledge what he has heard. They\r\n\treach the door of the Royal Chamber and he concludes the\r\n\tinterview.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tAs I am sure you remember from\r\n\t\tBalmoral, you do not talk while in Her\r\n\t\tMajesty's presence unless Her Majesty\r\n\t\taddresses you directly.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN refuses to answer, so PONSONBY knocks. After a\r\n\tmoment, the door is opened by LADY ELY who ushers them in.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, QUEEN'S SITTING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN walks stiffly into the room and stops. PONSONBY\r\n\twaits by the door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY (O.S.)\r\n\t\tMr Brown, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA is bent over the desk, working at one of her\r\n\tnumerous red boxes. She scribbles furiously at a letter,\r\n\tunderlining and accenting words as she goes. Finally, LADY\r\n\tELY steps up to her side and whispers something in her ear. \r\n\tShe carries on working.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN has time to survey the room. Dominating everything\r\n\tare the same black-wreathed busts and portraits of Prince\r\n\tAlbert glimpsed in the corridor.\r\n\r\n\tFinally, VICTORIA nods and LADY ELY beckons BROWN forward. \r\n\tHe steps up in front of the desk and waits. VICTORIA looks\r\n\tup and BROWN bows deeply.\r\n\r\n\tSilence.\r\n\r\n\tShe stares at him for a long moment without apparently\r\n\tregistering who he is. He towers over her, in bright\r\n\ttartan, while she sits hunched in her seat, all in black\r\n\tand knotted with tension.\r\n\r\n\tFinally, she finds her voice. She sounds nervous and edgy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMr Brown.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tMa'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou are here safely.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou are well?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tAnd the pony?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe's well, too.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA blinks at the sight of him. His presence is\r\n\tbringing him back. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYour family sent cards. It was much\r\n\t\tappreciated.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm glad of it.\r\n\r\n\tIn an effort to control her emotions, VICTORIA now sounds\r\n\tthe same severe note as at lunch. But BROWN, unlike\r\n\tothers, seems unaffected.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMy husband was always very\r\n\t\tcomplimentary in speaking of you. He\r\n\t\twould have approved, I am sure, of my\r\n\t\tcalling on you in this way.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI trust it does not inconvenience you\r\n\t\ttoo much.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI've no family, ma'am, apart from my\r\n\t\tbrothers and sisters.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou have a brother in service here, do\r\n\t\tyou not?\r\n\t\t\t(furrowing her brow)\r\n\t\tI forget his name.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tArchie.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tThat will be company for you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. VICTORIA starts to tire. She takes a sip of\r\n\twater and spills a little on herself. Flustered, she\r\n\tsearches for a hanky but cannot find one. LADY ELY hurries\r\n\tup with one of her own and the Queen dabs it off. BROWN\r\n\twatches all of this with genuine concern. When VICTORIA\r\n\tfinally looks up, he stares at her in deep sympathy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tHonest to God, I never thought to see\r\n\t\tyou in such a state. You must miss\r\n\t\thim dreadfully.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stares back in stunned silence. PONSONBY coughs\r\n\tinvoluntarily. LADY ELY freezes. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou do not - he ... get him out.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tGet him out. Get him out!\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly, BROWN finds himself tugged backwards out of the\r\n\troom. LADY ELY rushes up to assist as VICTORIA shouts\r\n\therself into a fit of uncontrolled sobbing.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, BROWN'S QUARTERS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tSome minutes later, BROWN is angrily unpacking a trunk. \r\n\tHis humiliation expresses itself in the extraordinary\r\n\tferocity with which he slams down every object.\r\n\r\n\tHis younger brother, ARCHIE, sits on the bed. He's in his\r\n\tearly thirties, bright, sharp and dressed in the same\r\n\tdistinctive kilt and tweed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\t\t(telling it fast)\r\n\t\tSo the day they arrive, she greets the\r\n\t\tSultan and his family with barely a\r\n\t\tword and then retires to her chamber. \r\n\t\tThe Sultan, not used to State\r\n\t\tOccasions without a head of State, is\r\n\t\tstanding in the lobby waiting for\r\n\t\tsomeone to tell him what to do. But\r\n\t\tthe court is under strict instructions\r\n\t\tnot to talk in the corridors so nobody\r\n\t\tspeaks to him, not a living soul, for\r\n\t\tthe whole afternoon. So now it's\r\n\t\tdinner and everyone's standing round\r\n\t\tthe table -- still not a word --\r\n\t\twaiting for Her Majesty to arrive. \r\n\t\tOne hour goes by, two, the Sultan's\r\n\t\tgetting a wee bit peckish to say the\r\n\t\tleast. So finally, his wee laddy\r\n\t\tbreaks for the cold meats and stuffs a\r\n\t\tslice in his mouth. Well, the uproar\r\n\t\twhen she heard. You'd have thought\r\n\t\tsomeone had stolen the crown jewels.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares back, still pissed off.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSo?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tSo, there are rules. Things you do\r\n\t\tand things you don't do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI was just telling the woman how I\r\n\t\tfeel, for God's sake.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tYou don't tell Her Majesty how you\r\n\t\tfeel.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI speak as I find, Archie.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tNot down south you don't.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN slams a drawer shut. ARCHIE lets it go and watches\r\n\this brother. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tSo what did Ponsonby do when she\r\n\t\tstarted shouting?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI think he nearly ruptured his truss.\r\n\r\n\tA beat, then both men burst out laughing.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, SERVANT'S HALL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe clatter of voices and banging doors as under servants\r\n\thurry about with plates, knives and forks, laying the Upper\r\n\tServant's huge table for dinner. ARCHIE leads BROWN\r\n\tthrough this rush of activity.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHow much?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tSeventy a year.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNot bad, not bad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tHow about yourself?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSixty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\t\t(grinning)\r\n\t\tThat's pretty good for a ghillie.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN smiles dryly. They pour themselves a drink from the\r\n\ttable.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tPrince Leopold? Is he the one who\r\n\t\tbleeds all day? So what does his\r\n\t\tvalet do? Wash his poultices for him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tIt's better than shovelling horse\r\n\t\tshit.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf you were looking for promotion, you\r\n\t\tshould have picked one of the\r\n\t\thealthier ones.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tShe's hardly a full hamper herself.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tIt's only grief makes her like she is.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tThree years, John. Is that not a bit\r\n\t\tlong to be grieving?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe loved him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tCome on, man. There's love and\r\n\t\tthere's ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tYou know what I mean.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm not sure I do, Archie.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tThere's love and there's behaving like\r\n\t\tyou do because there's nobody to tell\r\n\t\tyou not to.\r\n\r\n\tHold on BROWN. He lets it go and moves on. Across the\r\n\thall, he spots the pretty ASSISTANT DRESSER watching them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhich one of us is she flirting with?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tThe good-looking one.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye? Then she's obviously not got\r\n\t\tenough to do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tYou work the system right, you could\r\n\t\task her yourself. Just be thankful\r\n\t\tyou're not working for Household. The\r\n\t\tQueen never lets them out of her\r\n\t\tsight. But wee spats like us can slip\r\n\t\tthrough the net, easy.\r\n\r\n\tA beat. BROWN stares straight at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm no wee spat, ARCHIE.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, UPPER CORRIDOR - MORNING\r\n\r\n\tThe next day, VICTORIA and her ladies are hurrying down a\r\n\tcorridor on her way into the dining room. VICTORIA\r\n\tsuddenly stops and stares out of the windows. Her\r\n\tentourage are several steps past her before they realize\r\n\twhat's happened and scurry back to take up their positions\r\n\tbehind.\r\n\r\n\tNow we see what has caught her attention. BROWN is\r\n\tstanding in the courtyard below, by his pony. She watches\r\n\thim for a moment, then without reacting, walks on.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE - AFTERNOON\r\n\r\n\tSome hours later. It is now raining.\r\n\r\n\tA gaggle of ROYAL GRANDCHILDREN hurry out of a carriage\r\n\tfrom their afternoon recreational while their NANNIES\r\n\tfrantically try to keep them dry under the umbrellas. John\r\n\tBROWN stands tall and erect on the gravel while they rush\r\n\taround him, laughing and giggling.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, UPPER CORRIDOR - EVENING\r\n\r\n\tRain on the window. VICTORIA is walking in the opposite\r\n\tdirection down the corridor with her entourage. She stops\r\n\tat the same place as before.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(as if she had not seem him\r\n\t\t\t earlier)\r\n\t\tWho is that?\r\n\r\n\tLady Ely peers through the rain.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tIt's Mr Brown, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhat is he doing there?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tHe appears to be ... standing by his\r\n\t\thorse.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI made no request to go out riding\r\n\t\ttoday.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tHow long has he been there?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tI don't know, ma'am.\r\n\t\t\t(nervously)\r\n\t\tHe was observed earlier, I believe.\r\n\r\n\tAt this moment, PONSONBY comes down the corridor.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tSir Henry, Mr Brown is standing in the\r\n\t\tcourtyard. I have no wish to go\r\n\t\triding.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI'm very sorry, ma'am. I can't\r\n\t\timagine -- he was certainly given no\r\n\t\tinstructions.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tPlease make sure it does not happen\r\n\t\tagain.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tOf course, at once.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA takes one last look and walks away.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, PRIVATE SECRETARY'S CHAMBERS - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tHalf an hour later, PONSONBY stands at his desk facing\r\n\tBROWN.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tWhat on earth did you think you were\r\n\t\tdoing?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares straight back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAwaiting my orders.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYou do not report for duty unless the\r\n\t\tQueen requests it. You know that very\r\n\t\twell.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI didn't come all this way to sit on\r\n\t\tmy arse.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYou will await your orders like\r\n\t\teveryone else. Unless you prefer a\r\n\t\trepeat of yesterday's little\r\n\t\texcitement.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNo.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, UPPER CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day. From a high window, we see PONSONBY\r\n\tscuttling madly across the courtyard towards the figure of\r\n\tJOHN BROWN, who is standing exactly as he was the day\r\n\tbefore.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA watches impassively.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE, COURTYARD - DAY\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY stands close to BROWN, shouting in his face.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI thought I made myself perfectly\r\n\t\tclear. You do not leave your room\r\n\t\tuntil Her Majesty requests it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(eyes straight ahead,\r\n\t\t\t shouting back)\r\n\t\tWell, you tell Her Majesty from me, if\r\n\t\ther husband was here now, he'd have\r\n\t\thad her out of that house and getting\r\n\t\tsome air in her. What the hell's the\r\n\t\tpoint in me being here otherwise?!\r\n\r\n\tFrom the window above, VICTORIA takes in his words. A\r\n\tbeat. PONSONBY collects himself.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tGo inside at once.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIs that the Queen's request?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYes, it most certainly is!\r\n\r\n\tBROWN turns, grabs the lead rein and leads his horse back\r\n\tto the stables.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, STABLES - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, BROWN is in the process of stabling\r\n\this horse. Suddenly he turns.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA is standing at the far end of the stable with her\r\n\tentourage.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMr Brown.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou have been told repeatedly not to\r\n\t\tstand in the courtyard unless\r\n\t\trequested to do so.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThen why do you persist in doing it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tBecause I think Her Majesty is wrong. \r\n\t\tIf ever there was a poor soul who\r\n\t\tneeded fresh air, it is her.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThe Queen will ride out if and when\r\n\t\tshe chooses.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAnd I intend to be there when she's\r\n\t\tready.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. The two of them stare at each other.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE, THE GROUNDS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day, high and wide over the stunningly manicured\r\n\tlandscape. Long lawns, wind-cropped copses and in the\r\n\tdistance, the glittering sea.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE, THE GROUNDS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA sits side-saddle on a horse. BROWN leads her in\r\n\tsilence.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. CLIFFTOP - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA looks up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tPrince Albert was going to build a\r\n\t\tbench here. He thought it one of the\r\n\t\tbest views in Osborne.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt's a fine spot, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHe thought so, yes.\r\n\r\n\tShe stares ahead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tIn everything I do and everything I\r\n\t\tsay, I try to think, as much as\r\n\t\tpossible, what he would do, or say, if\r\n\t\the were here now. My Private\r\n\t\tSecretary wishes me to return to\r\n\t\tpublic duties--\r\n\r\n\tShe stops abruptly, but BROWN cuts in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf Prince Albert were here today, he'd\r\n\t\ttell him a thing or two.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tSir Henry is not alone. They all wish\r\n\t\tit.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tThe same people who refused to grant\r\n\t\tmy husband the title of King because\r\n\t\the was deemed of insufficient rank--\r\n\r\n\tShe stops again, cutting quickly back to small-talk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tIt is a fine spot for a bench, is it\r\n\t\tnot?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\tA pause.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI have some letters in the saddle bag. \r\n\t\tI wish to read them.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN walks up to her side, opens the saddle bag and hands\r\n\ther a bundle of letters held together with ribbon.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI cannot read them like that.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN undoes the ribbon and tries again. VICTORIA cuts in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tYou will hand them to me as I require.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN takes off the top letter and hands it to her.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, UPPER SERVANT'S TABLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThe clatter and crush of the Upper Servant's table as UPPER\r\n\tSERVANTS sit themselves down to dinner while UNDER SERVANTS\r\n\tprepare to serve soup.\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE comes in and sits himself somewhere in the middle\r\n\tnext to an empty seat. A moment later, BROWN strides in.\r\n\r\n\tBut instead of sitting at the place beside his brother, he\r\n\tgoes straight to the head of the table and plonks himself\r\n\tdown. Slowly, the clatter dies away as the whole room\r\n\tstops and stares at him in silence. BROWN fixes them with\r\n\ta look.\r\n\r\n\tAn elderly butler steps into the room and stares in\r\n\tamazement at BROWN. A smooth young man, BERTIE'S VALET,\r\n\thurries up to intercede.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\tMr. Carter, the Head Butler, sits\r\n\t\tthere.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNot now he doesn't. This is my place.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\tBy whose authority?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tMy own.\r\n\r\n\tA little frisson of oh-my-gawdness. BERTIE'S VALET stares\r\n\ticily at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\tThe order of seating at the Upper\r\n\t\tServant's table is arranged personally\r\n\t\tby the Queen herself.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThat's a tautology lad.\r\n\t\t\t(unable to stop himself\r\n\t\t\t seriously explaining it)\r\n\t\tIf you say the Queen arranges\r\n\t\tsomething, you've no need to say she's\r\n\t\tdone it personally. That's\r\n\t\tunderstood.\r\n\r\n\tBut as far as BERTIE'S VALET is concerned, it isn't. He\r\n\tstares down in mute fury, then snaps his fingers at one of\r\n\tthe under servants, who rushes over. There is a hurried\r\n\texchange of whispers before the under servant rushes out.\r\n\r\n\tUnperturbed, BROWN brings out his flask and pours himself a\r\n\tsubstantial draft of whiskey. He turns to the pretty\r\n\tassistant dresser, sitting to his right.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tAre you dresser to Her Majesty?\r\n\r\n\tShe blinks nervously at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\tAssistant, sir, yes.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN tucks into his soup. Everyone watches and waits.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat's your name?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\tMary Taylor, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHave I seen you up in Balmoral, Mary?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\tI hope to go up next year.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou wouldn't happen to know what the\r\n\t\tQueen's reading for recreation, would\r\n\t\tyou, Mary?\r\n\r\n\tThe assistant dresser thinks for a moment.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\tLord Tennyson, sir?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN nods. All conversation stops as the under servant\r\n\tbursts back in. She halts at the door, looking blankly\r\n\tfrom Bertie's valet to the elderly butler. A beat. The\r\n\told man stiffens and makes his way to the middle of the\r\n\ttable.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN looks up from his soup.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAm I the only one eating?\r\n\r\n\tWith a clatter of spoons, everyone obediently eats.\r\n\r\n\tINT. OSBORNE HOUSE, DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later. A morning \"drawing room.\" Standing\r\n\tround the unlit fireplace are DOCTOR JENNER, LADY ELY, LADY\r\n\tCHURCHILL, the two LADIES IN WAITING and PRINCESS\r\n\tALEXANDRA. All are dressed against the icy wind that\r\n\twhistles through the open window where VICTORIA sits\r\n\tknitting busily while BERTIE stands beside her, coat\r\n\tbuttoned up to the collar. PONSONBY has stationed himself\r\n\topposite, beside a desk piled high with red dispatch boxes. \r\n\tHe runs through the daily itinerary.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tLord Clarendon arrives, by invitation,\r\n\t\tat eleven o'clock, followed at twelve\r\n\t\tby a picnic in the grounds to\r\n\t\tcelebrate Princess Alice's birthday. \r\n\t\tDispatches, as usual, at two.\r\n\t\t\t(finishes, then coughs)\r\n\t\tThe Chancellor writes to say that, by\r\n\t\thappy coincidence, he will be in Cowes\r\n\t\tfor the weekend. He asks if Your\r\n\t\tMajesty might grant him an audience.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tHe thought, perhaps, Your Majesty\r\n\t\tmight wish to be informed of the\r\n\t\tlatest developments in government.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tNo. I shall be out walking.\r\n\r\n\tA beat. BERTIE watches closely now. PONSONBY coughs\r\n\tagain, nervous.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThen perhaps Your Majesty might\r\n\t\tconsider it opportune if the Prince of\r\n\t\tWales were to meet him on your behalf?\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stiffens. She speaks without turning.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tOn no account.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY gives up. Politely, but firmly, BERTIE takes up\r\n\tthe reins.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tMama, I really do think it's time we\r\n\t\tmade ourselves a little more ...\r\n\t\tavailable.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA carries on knitting.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI think we must accept our position in\r\n\t\tthe country is not entirely unrelated\r\n\t\tto the continued absence of the\r\n\t\tMonarchy from public life.\r\n\t\t\t(silence)\r\n\t\tI thought perhaps we might consider a\r\n\t\tsmall gesture of some kind?\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA looks up sharply.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tGesture?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI thought, a dinner for our\r\n\t\tambassadors perhaps?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in firmly)\r\n\t\tNo dinners, Bertie.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tWhy are you dressed for outdoors?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tIt's so infernally cold in here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tCold is good--\r\n\t\t\t(calling across)\r\n\t\tIs that not so, Dr. Jenner?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tI'm sorry, ma'am?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tCold is good!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tExcellent, ma'am, excellent.\r\n\t\t\t(trying his hand)\r\n\t\tBut perhaps if her Majesty were to\r\n\t\tconsider accompanying her new-found\r\n\t\tphysical vigor with the benefits of\r\n\t\tmental activity...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(becoming very agitated)\r\n\t\tWhy am I being lectured in this way?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tForgive me, Your Majesty. In no way\r\n\t\tdid I wish to suggest--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting across him)\r\n\t\tI will not tolerate anybody lecturing\r\n\t\tme about the responsibility of the\r\n\t\tmonarchy....\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tMother....\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t... Least of all my son. It was his\r\n\t\tirresponsibility that drove my husband\r\n\t\tto his grave.\r\n\r\n\tAn appalled silence. With great dignity, BERTIE absorbs\r\n\tthe shock of the insult and quietly steers the conversation\r\n\tin another direction.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tIf it is inconvenient to Her Majesty,\r\n\t\tthen perhaps she might consider\r\n\t\tallowing the Prince of Wales to host--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI do believe they send so many boxes\r\n\t\tto taunt me. \r\n\t\tDoctor Jenner writes to them to say\r\n\t\tthat my nerves are in an extremely\r\n\t\tfragile state and yet they continue to\r\n\t\thound me with box after box after box\r\n\t\tafter box after box!\r\n\r\n\tSilence. VICTORIA has crossed to the window and stares out\r\n\tat the view. Having recovered her composure, she turns to\r\n\taddress them all.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI wish to take the Princesses for a\r\n\t\tswim.\r\n\r\n\tFor a moment, nobody believes what they have heard. She\r\n\tcontinues.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tThe turns I have been taking in the\r\n\t\tgrounds have proved most beneficial to\r\n\t\tme, and Brown thinks that salt water\r\n\t\twill do me good.\r\n\r\n\tBertie stares at her in silence while PONSONBY and DOCTOR\r\n\tJENNER exchange a worried look.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. PRIVATE BEACH, ISLE OF WIGHT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe doors of the Royal bathing-machine swing open and Queen\r\n\tVICTORIA, in a voluminous swim-dress, sails out like a duck\r\n\tinto the freezing sea. As she does so, the doors of the\r\n\tother machines open and Princess Helena and Princess Louise\r\n\tfollow her in. Dignity does not allow them to shout out,\r\n\tbut their expressions of constipated agony are a picture.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA begins swimming around in a vigorous little\r\n\tcircle.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tDon't potter, children. Swim.\r\n\r\n\tHold for a moment on the princesses' miserable faces.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. OSBORNE HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tHalf an hour later, PONSONBY, DOCTOR JENNER, LADY ELY and\r\n\ttwo FOOTMEN watch as BROWN helps VICTORIA up some steps and\r\n\tonto her horse. He glances at the stiff line of\r\n\thouseholders and mutters curtly to himself.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou could buy that lot for garden\r\n\t\tornaments and still see change from\r\n\t\tten guineas.\r\n\r\n\tThe household do not hear this, but QUEEN VICTORIA has\r\n\toverheard and tries to suppress a smile. \r\n\tAs she settles into the saddle, her foot comes loose. \r\n\tBROWN fastens it into the stirrups.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tLift your foot, woman.\r\n\r\n\tEveryone hears this. VICTORIA obeys. Taking the reins, he\r\n\tthen walks the QUEEN out of the courtyard. As they vanish\r\n\tfrom site, we hear...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThis nation is fortunate in so much as\r\n\t\tit is not governed by force...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"1866\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\tINT. THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe speech continues as we follow the progress of a\r\n\tTomahawk cartoon doing the rounds of the Tory back benches\r\n\tfrom knee to knee. It is entitled, \"Where is Britannia?\"\r\n\tand shows an empty throne draped with the Royal cloak.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (O.S.)\r\n\t\t... but by a chain of traditions that\r\n\t\thave been cherished from generation to\r\n\t\tgeneration, because in them -- in our\r\n\t\ttraditions -- are embodied all the\r\n\t\tlaws which have enabled us to create\r\n\t\tthe greatest empire of modern times...\r\n\r\n\tDuring the above, the cartoon reaches the front benches and\r\n\tlands on the knees of the young, earnest STANLEY. As he\r\n\tfrowns at the picture in front of him, DISRAELI winds up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (CONT'D)\r\n\t\t... but, even though we have amassed\r\n\t\tgreat capital and even though we have\r\n\t\testablished an industry with no\r\n\t\tparallel in the world, yet all these\r\n\t\tmighty creations are as nothing\r\n\t\tcompared to the invisible customs that\r\n\t\tshape our lives. To those honorable\r\n\t\tgentlemen of the opposition who seek\r\n\t\tto destroy the essential elements of\r\n\t\tthis country, I say let them remember:\r\n\t\tEngland cannot begin again.\r\n\r\n\tDuring this peroration, we see DISRAELI for the first time. \r\n\tHe is handsome, obviously Jewish and wire thin, like\r\n\tDickens on Slimfast. He dresses almost dandyishly but\r\n\tspeaks with startling vigor; a combination of brilliance\r\n\tand cheek that is his key. To cheers from his back\r\n\tbenchers, he sits.\r\n\r\n\tAs he looks up, he catches the eye of his opposite on the\r\n\tLiberal benches. GLADSTONE is different in almost every\r\n\trespect; dour, dogged, heavy-set and tall. They stare\r\n\tlevelly for a second, then DISRAELI flashes a brilliant\r\n\tsmile.\r\n\r\n\tSTANLEY plops the cartoon on his lap.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tHave you seen this?\r\n\r\n\tINT. THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT, LOBBY CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, DISRAELI and STANLEY are strolling\r\n\tdown the busy lobby corridor. Throughout their talk, Tory\r\n\tback-benchers bustle up to pat their hero on the back and\r\n\toffer their congratulations.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tShould we take it seriously?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThe cartoon or Her Majesty's\r\n\t\tabsenteeism?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tWell, both.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThe question is, do we need her?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tSurely, you're not suggesting we\r\n\t\tdispense--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tMy dear Stanley, a Prime Minister with\r\n\t\tonly a handful of friends must respect\r\n\t\tpublic opinion.\r\n\r\n\tThe pass GLADSTONE in a huddle of cohorts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tGossip counts. Lord Aberdeen was\r\n\t\tright. This country is not governed\r\n\t\tby wisdom but by talk.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tGranted, it wouldn't take much to\r\n\t\twinkle the old girl out of mourning,\r\n\t\tbut if public opinion is against her,\r\n\t\tthen it doesn't do to appear too\r\n\t\tclose.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tSo?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWe'll see which way the wind blows.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI sweeps through a prattle of back-benchers.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. PUBLIC BEACH, ISLE OF WIGHT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN and ARCHIE crash into the water. It is freezing. \r\n\tBROWN braces himself against the icy shallows by bellowing\r\n\tBurns at the sea.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tMy heart's in the Highlands, my heart\r\n\t\tis not here! My heart's in the\r\n\t\tHighlands a-chasing the deer! Chasing\r\n\t\tthe wild deer and following the roe! \r\n\t\tMy heart's in the Highlands wherever I\r\n\t\tgo!\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE is so creased up with laughing, he almost drowns.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. PUBLIC BEACH, ISLE OF WIGHT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, BROWN and ARCHIE hurry back up the\r\n\tcold beach to rub themselves dry. BROWN is very energized.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tOne box of biscuits, one box of drop\r\n\t\ttablets, one box of pralines, sixteen\r\n\t\tchocolate sponges. It's the same\r\n\t\torder every week, but does anybody\r\n\t\tbother to check it? Now she has to\r\n\t\ttravel all the way to Balmoral without\r\n\t\tthe few luxuries she actually enjoys.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tSo? Someone'll send it on ahead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye, but will they?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tJohn, it's not your problem what she\r\n\t\teats.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThe woman's surrounded by fools!\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tShe has to be packed and ready to\r\n\t\tleave by seven thirty tomorrow\r\n\t\tmorning. Knowing that lot, they'll\r\n\t\tstill be dressing her at eight.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN takes a nip of whiskey and offers some to his\r\n\tbrother.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tShe's got an army of people to get her\r\n\t\tup and out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tBut I'm the only one she trusts.\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE stares at him. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tShe'll blow hot and cold on you, John,\r\n\t\tshe always does. You want to be\r\n\t\tcareful.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm on ninety pounds a year plus\r\n\t\tseventy pounds for a pile of tartan\r\n\t\tI'd be wearing anyway. That's as much\r\n\t\tas a Page of the Back Stairs gets and\r\n\t\tthat job's only for toffs.\r\n\t\t\t(raising his hip flask\r\n\t\t\t triumphantly at the sea)\r\n\t\tI'm Her Majesty's Highland Servant! \r\n\t\tIndoors and Out. There's no stopping\r\n\t\tme now.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tA few days later.\r\n\r\n\tThe clatter of carriage and horse as the ROYAL PARTY\r\n\tthunders through gathering dark toward Balmoral Castle.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"BALMORAL\"\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - TWILIGHT\r\n\r\n\tA mass of torches encircle the ROYAL PARTY as kilted\r\n\tGHILLIES and STAFF swarm round the carriage, opening doors\r\n\tand clambering off boxes while a regiment of PIPERS play\r\n\tthem in.\r\n\r\n\tAmid this swarm of activity, we glimpse BROWN opening the\r\n\tdoor to a smiling VICTORIA as she climbs down, followed by\r\n\tPRINCESS HELENA and PRINCESS LOUISE. Emerging from another\r\n\tcarriage come BERTIE and PRINCESS ALEXANDRA, staring grim\r\n\tfaced at the castle. HENRY PONSONBY and DOCTOR JENNER\r\n\talight from their carriage as PONSONBY slips on his gloves\r\n\tand pinches his nose at the pain of remembrance.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tOh God, not the pipes!\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day.\r\n\r\n\tHigh over the vast, bleak mountains of Lochnager and Loch\r\n\tMuick. VICTORIA and BROWN are riding fast towards the top. \r\n\tReaching the summit, VICTORIA points excitedly at the far\r\n\thorizon.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhat are those?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThose, over there, there.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(horse chestnut trees...)\r\n\t\tCraobhan-geanmchno-fhiadhaich.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tCraobhan-geanmchno...\r\n\t\t\t(bursts out laughing)\r\n\t\tHow can I possibly say that with a\r\n\t\tstraight face?!\r\n\r\n\tBROWN lets it go and they ride on.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI am thinking of publishing my\r\n\t\t\"Highland Journals.\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAre they worth reading?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI am told so.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWho by?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tSir Henry Ponsonby tells me they are\r\n\t\tcharming.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat does he know about the Highlands?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHe has been attending at Balmoral for\r\n\t\tmany years.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThat doesn't make him an expert.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHis remarks were directed at the\r\n\t\tquality of the writing, not its\r\n\t\tsubject.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI don't groom a horse to have it\r\n\t\tadmired by others, I groom it because\r\n\t\tit needs grooming.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(curtly)\r\n\t\tI do not do it for others. But\r\n\t\tPonsonby thinks they are good.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tJust say what you have to say, woman. \r\n\t\tWhat other people think shouldn't\r\n\t\tmatter to you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(snapping)\r\n\t\tOf course I shall say what I have to\r\n\t\tsay. I always do.\r\n\r\n\tThe stare at each other until BROWN kicks his horse on.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye, well, if all you want is a good\r\n\t\topinion then he'd be sure to oblige\r\n\t\tyou.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(riding alongside)\r\n\t\tWhat Mr Ponsonby was appreciating was\r\n\t\ttheir literary merit, a skill not\r\n\t\tintimately associated with the\r\n\t\tknowledge of grooming.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tLiterary appreciation does not begin\r\n\t\tand end with Tennyson.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN lowers his head.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\t\t(in a softer tone)\r\n\t\tI mention you in them.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN says nothing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tIn particular, the occasion when\r\n\t\tAlbert was alive; the Royal Carriage\r\n\t\toverturned during a storm and you\r\n\t\tdemonstrated such loyal service in\r\n\t\treturning the Queen and the Princesses\r\n\t\tsafely to Balmoral.\r\n\r\n\tTaking a sprig of heather from her brooch, VICTORIA holds\r\n\tit out to him. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tFor friendship.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later, PONSONBY, DOCTOR JENNER and BROWN stand\r\n\tat the chamber-desk, talking over the Queen's itinerary.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(briskly)\r\n\t\tShe'll be away on Friday between eight\r\n\t\to'clock and six in the evening to\r\n\t\tvisit the Grants in Glasalt. If she's\r\n\t\tto make the journey there and back in\r\n\t\tthe day she's to have no distractions\r\n\t\tthe night before. She'll take a light\r\n\t\tsupper alone in her private drawing\r\n\t\troom and retire early.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tShe'll need to sign dispatches before\r\n\t\tshe retires.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThat can wait till the weekend.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThere are important papers from --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt can wait. Anything else?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tAre you sure Her Majesty is up to such\r\n\t\ta long journey? She has only just\r\n\t\trecovered from a severe head cold.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf I thought she wasn't up to it, I\r\n\t\twouldn't let her go, would I?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN snaps together his papers and walks out, leaving\r\n\tPONSONBY and DOCTOR JENNER standing lamely at the table.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next morning. The ROYAL FAMILY are picnicking in the\r\n\tgrounds. VICTORIA walks along a path accompanied on one\r\n\tside by BROWN, on the other by BERTIE.\r\n\r\n\tBERTIE is in mid-plea.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tSurely it is for the gentlemen to\r\n\t\tdecide when to stop...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tIt is a disgusting habit, Bertie. It\r\n\t\tshould be discouraged.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tYes, but isn't midnight a little\r\n\t\texcessive?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tIt is quite late enough.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tBut mama, the room was built expressly\r\n\t\tfor that purpose. It has been a\r\n\t\tsmoking-room by tradition ever since\r\n\t\tfather --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in angrily)\r\n\t\tBrown's responsibilities are onerous\r\n\t\tenough already. He has far too much\r\n\t\tto do without having to stay up all\r\n\t\tnight waiting for you to go to bed. \r\n\t\tThe smoking-room will be closed and\r\n\t\tthe lights put out at twelve o'clock.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tMama...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tAnd that is my last word on the\r\n\t\tmatter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tWell, I'm sorry, but I really do think\r\n\t\tit's too much that the gentlemen of\r\n\t\tthe house should be dictated to by a\r\n\t\tservant.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt's the Queen's decision.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI beg your pardon?\r\n\t\t\t(to VICTORIA)\r\n\t\tMama...?\r\n\r\n\tBefore Bertie can continue, BROWN steps right into his\r\n\tface.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI think you should go now.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou've tired your mother enough.\r\n\r\n\tBERTIE stares back, too stunned to speak. He glances at\r\n\this mother, but VICTORIA looks off into the distance as if\r\n\tshe has not heard. BERTIE turns and storms away.\r\n\r\n\tINT. ESTATE COTTAGE, BALMORAL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tJOHN BROWN is standing in the doorway of a small cottage\r\n\twatching, with amused detachment, as a middle-aged couple,\r\n\tMR and MRS GRANT, race about their tiny living room, trying\r\n\tdesperately to make it presentable for the Queen's sudden\r\n\tvisit. They fling open the windows, slosh water on the\r\n\tfire, tidy up their two grubby BOYS, plump up the cushions,\r\n\tdump knitting under the sofa and try to smarten themselves\r\n\tup, all in the space of a few seconds.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThere's really no need for this.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\tI'll not have her seeing it like it\r\n\t\tis!\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI know she means well, but I wish\r\n\t\tshe'd warn us she was coming.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe thinks if she warned you, you'd go\r\n\t\tpouring water on the fire and stuffing\r\n\t\tthe knitting under the sofa.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMR GRANT\r\n\t\tAye, well, you can't stop a wife being\r\n\t\thouse-proud.\r\n\r\n\tMRS GRANT surveys the room critically.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\tAll right.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tShow her in.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. ESTATE COTTAGE, BALMORAL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA sits on a horse and trap. BROWN steps out and\r\n\thelps her down.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThey're ready now.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI hope they didn't go to any trouble,\r\n\t\tJohn.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAh, well...\r\n\r\n\tINT. ESTATE COTTAGE, BALMORAL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA steps in to be greeted by all four GRANTS in one\r\n\tmilitary row, smoke still steaming off the fire. BROWN\r\n\tstands behind her, barely able to contain himself. But for\r\n\tVICTORIA, it is all she's ever known and so she takes it as\r\n\tperfectly normal.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMr Grant. How good it is to see you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMR GRANT\r\n\t\t\t(bowing deeply)\r\n\t\tYour Majesty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMrs Grant. How is your knee? Has the\r\n\t\tpain eased a little?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\t\t(bobbing in terror)\r\n\t\tOh not so bad, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tGood. Oh and here are Douglas and\r\n\t\tJohn. Haven't you grown?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\t\t(still bobbing away)\r\n\t\tGrowing all the time, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tMR GRANT remembers himself and gestures VICTORIA towards a\r\n\tchair.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMR GRANT\r\n\t\tWill you sit, ma'am?\r\n\r\n\tFrom his place by the wall, BROWN notices how easily she\r\n\tsmiles as she is led to the chair. She points to a picture\r\n\ton the wall and her good humour is infectious.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI know that! That's Cairn Lochan. We\r\n\t\tpicnicked there once, did we not,\r\n\t\tJohn?\r\n\r\n\tINT. A SOCIETY PARTY, LONDON - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later, a party of ARISTOCRATS, MINISTERS,\r\n\tDIPLOMATS, ESCORTS, BUSINESSMAN and WHORES. Into this\r\n\tbrouhaha come DISRAELI, his elderly wife MARY ANNE and the\r\n\tyoung STANLEY. It is all eyes and nods here. Everyone\r\n\tknows everyone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tAh, the greasy pole.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMARY ANNE\r\n\t\tDon't be facetious, dear. Remember\r\n\t\tyour position.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tIt's my position I'm thinking of.\r\n\r\n\tAcross the room, STANLEY spots BERTIE amid a crowd of\r\n\tacolytes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tI see the Prince of Wales is here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI hope he got his mother's permission.\r\n\r\n\tSTANLEY smiles faintly. DISRAELI homes in on a punter and\r\n\traises his hand, already working the room.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tLord Salisbury!\r\n\r\n\tINT. A SOCIETY PARTY, LONDON - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe society party is hotting up. STANLEY is deep in\r\n\tconversation with three SOCIETY LADIES.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSOCIETY LADY 1\r\n\t\t\t(ridiculously pleased with\r\n\t\t\t herself)\r\n\t\tWhy is the Queen penny-wise and pound\r\n\t\tfoolish? Because she looks after the\r\n\t\tBrowns and lets the sovereigns take\r\n\t\tcare of themselves!\r\n\r\n\tA peal of naughty laughter. Unseen, DISRAELI steps up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tAnd in your opinion? Is she foolish?\r\n\r\n\tThe SOCIETY LADY stares blankly back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSOCIETY LADY 1\r\n\t\tWell I ... well, I mean to say, it's\r\n\t\thardly right, is it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSOCIETY LADY 1\r\n\t\tWell, the Queen and --\r\n\t\t\t(appalled whisper)\r\n\t\tMr Brown.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI stares at her steadily, already thinking ahead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tLa superstition met le monde entier en\r\n\t\tflammes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSOCIETY LADY 2\r\n\t\t\t(thick as shit)\r\n\t\tI beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(changing tack)\r\n\t\tHas anybody seen this ... Mr Brown?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tHe is her personal servant, I believe.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSOCIETY LADY 1\r\n\t\t\t(knowingly)\r\n\t\tFollows her wherever she goes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tHe would hardly make a very good\r\n\t\tpersonal assistant if he did not.\r\n\r\n\tINT. ESTATE COTTAGE, BALMORAL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stands by a wall, smiling to himself at the sight of\r\n\tQUEEN VICTORIA struggling to help lay the table while MRS\r\n\tGRANT nervously prattles on.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\t... it's not my best china. I mean,\r\n\t\tit is my best china now, but the\r\n\t\tfamily set got stolen last summer.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tOh, I'm so sorry ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tMRS GRANT\r\n\t\tOf course it was no-one on the Estate. \r\n\t\tMore likely one of the lads from\r\n\t\tBraemar. Or further even.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI'll fetch the salt.\r\n\r\n\tMRS GRANT scurries away. VICTORIA immediately holds up the\r\n\tspoons to BROWN with a questioning look -- above or beside\r\n\tthe plate? He nods her to the top and she quickly carries\r\n\ton.\r\n\r\n\tINT. A SOCIETY PARTY, LONDON - DAY\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI and MARY ANNE stand with BERTIE and his ACOLYTES.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tMr Disraeli. Ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tYour Royal Highness. What a pleasure\r\n\t\tto see you here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tHave you met Mr Lyle? He's in\r\n\t\tsugar...?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI don't think I've had that pleasure.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI shakes hands with the fat sugar tycoon who wobbles\r\n\twith drink. MARY ANNE engages him in conversation while\r\n\tBERTIE turns DISRAELI aside.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tNo doubt you've heard the rumors.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI take no account of gossip, Your\r\n\t\tHighness.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tMy concern is for the reputation of\r\n\t\tthe Monarchy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tOf course.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI fear the influence he has on her. \r\n\t\tThe man's word is not to be credited. \r\n\t\tHe is an arriviste of the very lowest\r\n\t\twater.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tShe's having a bust cast of him. In\r\n\t\tNero Marquino marble.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI see.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI would talk to her myself, but she\r\n\t\twon't listen to me. She must be\r\n\t\tpersuaded, by someone she respects, to\r\n\t\tabandon this ridiculous favoritism\r\n\t\tbefore a situation develops.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tA situation?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI don't imagine you frequent the\r\n\t\tRepublican Clubs. But the fact that\r\n\t\tneither you nor I are members should\r\n\t\tnot blind us to the significance of\r\n\t\ttheir existence.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tThe Tory Party has always been our\r\n\t\tparty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI'm flattered you think so.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI tell you, if we don't stick together\r\n\t\ton this, you could find yourself First\r\n\t\tPresident's Opposition.\r\n\t\t\t(murdering it)\r\n\t\tDu Royaum Uni.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tQuite.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI don't think we can overstate the\r\n\t\tseriousness of this.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI nods and BERTIE walks swiftly back to his party. \r\n\tThe moment he's gone, STANLEY steps up to DISRAELI's side.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tWhat did he want?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tTo know when he'll be king.\r\n\r\n\tINT. ESTATE COTTAGE, BALMORAL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA, BROWN and the GRANTS are eating around a large\r\n\ttable. Like a wife watching her husband, VICTORIA beams\r\n\tproudly at BROWN as he tells a story.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t... so Grant here and myself are\r\n\t\triding over Lochnagar and the rain's\r\n\t\tpouring down in sheets and all we're\r\n\t\tthinking about is getting home for a\r\n\t\tdrink, when through the gloom Grant\r\n\t\tspots a couple of poachers. He gives\r\n\t\tme a shout and we chase them down\r\n\t\ttowards the loch until Grant has your\r\n\t\tmen up against the stacks and he's\r\n\t\tshouting and cursing at them, \"Why are\r\n\t\tyou poaching on Royal land?!\" And one\r\n\t\tof the little fellas looks up at him\r\n\t\tand says, \"coz we've come up in the\r\n\t\tworld.\"\r\n\r\n\tFor a split second, both the GRANTS look petrified, then\r\n\tBROWN and VICTORIA explode into laughter and the GRANTS\r\n\trelax. Suddenly the GRANTS are helpless with laughter too. \r\n\tBeginning with VICTORIA's glass, BROWN pours out liberal\r\n\tquantities of whiskey all round.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DUSK\r\n\r\n\tLater that night, the courtyard is packed with a gaggle of\r\n\tworried HOUSEHOLDERS holding lamps.\r\n\r\n\tThrough the light, BROWN and VICTORIA clatter into the\r\n\tcourtyard on the horse and trap. DOCTOR JENNER breaks\r\n\tthrough the crowd in a state of high excitement.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tYour Majesty! Thank goodness you're\r\n\t\tsafe! I'll have a bath prepared\r\n\t\timmediately. I recommend Macdonald's\r\n\t\tAfrican Embrocation --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in)\r\n\t\tAh, pipe down, man. The woman's fine.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWe stayed a little longer than\r\n\t\texpected with Mr and Mrs Grant. It\r\n\t\twas most agreeable.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tWe were expecting you to return by\r\n\t\tsix.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tAnd now I am back.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN cannot resist one more little dig.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWe took a nip of whiskey.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tTo keep out the cold.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA smiles and BROWN lifts her off the trap. Before\r\n\twalking in she turns and, in front of everyone, says...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThank you, John.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN bows and the QUEEN walks on. As she straightens up,\r\n\the finds PONSONBY and DOCTOR JENNER staring back at him in\r\n\tutter disbelief at what she has just said. He turns and\r\n\tleads the horse back to the stables.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\t\t(under his breath)\r\n\t\tShe's drunk.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY doesn't answer. He is watching BROWN very\r\n\tclosely.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tA distinct flushing around the cheeks. \r\n\t\tShe was drunk, I tell you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tNo, she wasn't.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. JENNER turns to look at PONSONBY.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tSurely not ...\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY's face is set hard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tDon't even think about it.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, BALLROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tA crush of kilted GHILLIES as we slam into the height of\r\n\tthe annual Ghillie's Ball.\r\n\r\n\tThe whole court is reeling through the dance; all of them\r\n\tbeholding the extraordinary spectacle of QUEEN VICTORIA and\r\n\tJOHN BROWN dancing together in the middle of the hall.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY and JENNER stand by the wall, watching. Close-up\r\n\ton PONSONBY'S face as JENNER mutters darkly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tPandora's Box ...\r\n\r\n\tWith a slam of feet the reel ends, the GHILLIES roar and\r\n\tBROWN and VICTORIA stand smiling at each other in silence. \r\n\tA King and his Queen.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, BALLROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tLater that night.\r\n\r\n\tWe find BROWN, slouched on the ground, dead-drunk and\r\n\tsnoring loudly.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later, four JOURNALISTS are scrabbling up a\r\n\tstony path, armed with telescopes.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA large ROYAL PARTY is making its way smoothly and quietly\r\n\tup the mountain. BROWN is on horseback, leading VICTORIA\r\n\ton a dapple-grey.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe JOURNALISTS rattle up the hill.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN and VICTORIA start pulling ahead of the main party.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe JOURNALISTS scramble up to some gorse bushes, dump\r\n\tthemselves down and start setting up the telescopes.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN and VICTORIA near the summit when BROWN suddenly\r\n\tstops. He stiffens and turns to face the wind, as if\r\n\tcatching a scent. VICTORIA frowns.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhat is it, John?\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tJohn?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI heard something.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN's eyes fix on some distant gorse bushes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI won't be long.\r\n\r\n\tHe dismounts and races off.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe JOURNALISTS are peering through their telescopes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJOURNALIST 1\r\n\t\tWhere did he get to? I've lost him?\r\n\r\n\tBelow them, BROWN races across the riverbank and\r\n\tundergrowth, unseen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJOURNALIST 2\r\n\t\tI don't know if there's much worth\r\n\t\twriting about.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJOURNALIST 1\r\n\t\tHard to tell.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN rears up above them and stops.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThis close enough for you? Go on! On\r\n\t\tyour way! You filthy scavengers!\r\n\r\n\tThe JOURNALISTS scramble to their feet and start legging it\r\n\tdown the hill, while BROWN roars furiously, hurling their\r\n\tbags after them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tYou leave her alone, do you hear?!\r\n\r\n\tThe JOURNALISTS vanish below the hillside.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, UPPER SERVANT'S TABLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThat night.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is standing at the head of the table, yelling at the\r\n\tUPPER SERVANTS, irrespective of ARCHIE or anyone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf I catch the miserable by-blow who\r\n\t\ttold those men where she'd be, then\r\n\t\tI'll hang his balls to dry on Jock\r\n\t\tWemyss, so I will!!\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE glances up at BERTIE'S VALET. He is staring down at\r\n\tthe table, teeth gritted, fists clenched. BROWN rounds on\r\n\tthem all again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWhat happens to John Brown is his\r\n\t\tbusiness, but the Queen's security\r\n\t\twill never be compromised!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\tWe --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou'll talk when I'm finished!\r\n\r\n\tBERTIE'S VALET stares at him in astonishment. BROWN turns\r\n\tback to the table.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tThat kind of disloyalty will not be\r\n\t\ttolerated in this house, is that\r\n\t\tclear?\r\n\t\t\t(beat, yelling)\r\n\t\tI said, is that clear?!\r\n\r\n\tThere is a general mutter of assent. BROWN turns and\r\n\tstorms out as ARCHIE gets up to follow.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, HENRY PONSONBY'S ROOMS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later, PONSONBY is sitting at his desk, hands to\r\n\this hips, listening quietly as DOCTOR JENNER reads from his\r\n\tcopy of Punch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\t\"Court Circular, Balmoral.\"\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\t\"On Tuesday, Mr John Brown enjoyed a\r\n\t\tdisplay of sheep-dipping by local\r\n\t\tfarmers. On Wednesday, he attended a\r\n\t\tseance where he was pleased to listen\r\n\t\tto a recital of Auld Lang Syne by Mr\r\n\t\tRobert Burns himself ...\"\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, LOWER CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN crashes through a door holding a copy of the same\r\n\tjournal.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER (O.S.)\r\n\t\t\"... On Thursday, Mr John Brown walked\r\n\t\ton the slopes, accompanied by family\r\n\t\tand friend ...\"\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN storms up to PONSONBY's door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER (O.S.)\r\n\t\tMr Brown retired early.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, HENRY PONSONBY'S ROOMS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN bursts in on PONSONBY and JENNER, slamming down his\r\n\tcopy of Punch on the desk. He is furious but controlled.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf I find out that you had anything to\r\n\t\tdo with this, I will have you sacked.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI believe that decision rests with Her\r\n\t\tMajesty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tDon't think I can't persuade her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI don't doubt that the Queen was\r\n\t\thighly amused. She has always had a\r\n\t\tvery healthy sense of humor.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThis is a slur on her good name.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tIn as much as the article is about\r\n\t\tyourself, I think you must now accept\r\n\t\tthat the public has a right to its\r\n\t\tinterest in you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNobody has any rights over me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tWe are all of us subject to forces\r\n\t\tbeyond our control, Mr Brown, even\r\n\t\tyou.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares at him in silence. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou'll regret saying that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"1867\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\tINT. THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT - DAY\r\n\r\n\tChaos. The Tories are losing the vote as both sides of the\r\n\thouse stand and shout at each other while the SPEAKER rises\r\n\tin his chair.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSPEAKER (O.S.)\r\n\t\tOrder! Order! ORDER!\r\n\r\n\tA buzzing silence settles as the house sits for the vote. \r\n\tThe COUNTERS approach the chair.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSPEAKER (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tResult of the vote to the first\r\n\t\treading of the Bill to Disestablish\r\n\t\tthe Irish Church.\r\n\r\n\tA murmur of excitement from the LIBERALS.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSPEAKER (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tOrder!\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tCOUNTER\r\n\t\tAyes to the right, three hundred and\r\n\t\tthirty, noes to the left, two hundred\r\n\t\tand sixty-five...\r\n\r\n\tBy the time he reaches \"sixty-five\" his voice is drowned in\r\n\tcheers from the Liberal benches. DISRAELI and the rest of\r\n\tthe front bench sit in stony silence.\r\n\r\n\tSomewhere on the Liberal back benches, a wild-eyed\r\n\tmaverick, DILKE, rises to his feet shouting:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDILKE\r\n\t\tMr Speaker, I table a motion in\r\n\t\tfurtherance of the Bill to\r\n\t\tDisestablish the Monarchy!\r\n\r\n\tA roar from the irate TORIES and chaos reigns again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSPEAKER\r\n\t\tOrder! Order!! ORDER!!!\r\n\r\n\tINT. THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT, LOBBY CORRIDOR - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tAn hour later the house is empty except for a few\r\n\tstraggling MPs hurrying home. An exhausted DISRAELI stands\r\n\tin the corridor with STANLEY.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWe're going to lose.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tYou can't know that for sure.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tGladstone's got his party facing the\r\n\t\tsame way for the first time in years. \r\n\t\tWe need help.\r\n\t\t\t(long beat)\r\n\t\tWhere is the old girl?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tWho?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tMrs Brown.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tIt's questionable whether there's any\r\n\t\tadvantage to be had from that\r\n\t\tdirection. She's never been less\r\n\t\tpopular.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tIn the press, perhaps.\r\n\t\t\t(holding up Punch)\r\n\t\tBut she's sold more copies of her\r\n\t\tHighland Journal in three months than\r\n\t\tPunch will ever sell in a year. Time\r\n\t\tto wheel her out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tShe's refusing to leave Balmoral.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWhat's her excuse this time?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\tThe Princess Louisa is too ill to\r\n\t\tmove. Frankly, the Queen's rather\r\n\t\tupset at the recent spate of bad\r\n\t\tpublicity.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou're smiling.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI was trying to imagine \"rather\r\n\t\tupset.\"\r\n\r\n\tThe elderly prelate, DEAN WELLSELLY, hurries in through the\r\n\tlobby doors. DISRAELI puts on a welcoming smile.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tForgive me, gentlemen. I'm late.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tNot at all, Dean. Good of you to\r\n\t\tspare the time.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tI came as quickly as I could.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tYou've seen the latest cartoon in\r\n\t\tPunch, I take it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\t\t(completely lost)\r\n\t\tI beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI opens the copy of Punch and hands it to Dean\r\n\tWellselly. The Dean clears his throat and starts to read.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(as Wellselly reads)\r\n\t\tOne of our madder brethren in the\r\n\t\thouse was calling for disestablishment\r\n\t\tof the monarchy.\r\n\r\n\tDean Wellselly looks up from the article, horrified.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tGood Lord.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSTANLEY\r\n\t\t\t(playing the soft glove)\r\n\t\tI'm sure it won't come to that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(the hard glove)\r\n\t\tNo. But it has now become a matter\r\n\t\tfor our consciences.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI was just telling Stanley how vital\r\n\t\tit is that the nation should feel the\r\n\t\tvisible influence of the Sovereign. \r\n\t\tAs a reminder that Parliament, indeed\r\n\t\tmy own ministry, depends on the will\r\n\t\tof the Queen.\r\n\r\n\tDEAN WELLSELLY nods his head gravely. Over his shoulder,\r\n\tSTANLEY is gaping at DISRAELI's silky distortion of the\r\n\tparty political maneuver into a moral imperative.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tI couldn't agree with you more, but I\r\n\t\tam only Dean of Windsor. I don't\r\n\t\tunderstand what ...\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI interrupts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWe hear from Balmoral that Mr Brown is\r\n\t\tinteresting Her Majesty in some of the\r\n\t\tforms of worship associated with ...\r\n\t\tlow-church Presbyterian.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. DEAN WELLSELLY'S face is a picture of\r\n\tunrestrained horror. Low-church. Presbyterian.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tWhat can we do?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tOh, several things.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, QUEEN'S DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tSome days later.\r\n\r\n\tQueen VICTORIA sits at her desk while Henry PONSONBY stands\r\n\tin front of her, holding a copy of The Times.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tRead it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tAgain?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tRead it!\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY coughs once and begins again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\t\"The Times wishes to join the rest of\r\n\t\tHer Majesty's loyal subjects in\r\n\t\texpressing its deep joy at the news\r\n\t\tthat the Queen is soon to come out of\r\n\t\ther mourning.\"\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA glowers at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWho told them that?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI have no idea.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy not?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI -- forgive me, ma'am, I am no wiser\r\n\t\tthan yourself.\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly, VICTORIA's temper goes and she shouts at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tNo-one should think themselves wiser\r\n\t\tthan me!\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tIt is not for any of the Queen's\r\n\t\tsubjects to presume to tell Her\r\n\t\tMajesty when and where She should come\r\n\t\tout of mourning. It is the Queen's\r\n\t\tsorrow that keeps her secluded! It is\r\n\t\tHer overwhelming amount of work and\r\n\t\tresponsibility, work which She feels\r\n\t\twill soon wear her out entirely!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tYour Majesty --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting right through him)\r\n\t\tIs it not enough that She is uncheered\r\n\t\tand unguided that she should also have\r\n\t\tto suffer these malicious rumors?!\r\n\t\t\t(a pause, more quietly)\r\n\t\tI am not a fool.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI know there are those in the\r\n\t\testablishment too afraid to attack me\r\n\t\tand so they attack my dearest friends. \r\n\t\tSometimes -- I feel that Brown is all\r\n\t\tI have left of Albert.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tAnd now they attack Brown too.\r\n\r\n\tShe looks up, eyes blazing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI will not give him up to them.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, ROOM ADJOINING DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is guarding the door to the drawing room while the\r\n\tbalding BERTIE muscles up, eye ball to eye ball.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tI wish to see my mother.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe's busy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tConvey her a message.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe's away to Windsor tomorrow. Talk\r\n\t\tto her there.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tTell her the Prince of Wales wishes to\r\n\t\tspeak with her urgently about matters\r\n\t\tconcerning the press.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAre you deaf as well as stupid?\r\n\r\n\tA split-second. BERTIE gapes at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tWhat did you say?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI said, are you deaf as well as\r\n\t\tstupid?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tDo you know who you address, sir?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhom you address.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tThe future King!\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWell, everyone's entitled to their\r\n\t\topinion.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tOut of my way!\r\n\r\n\tFoolishly, BERTIE tries to barge his way past. Suddenly\r\n\tBROWN loses it completely. He grabs the Prince of Wales by\r\n\tthe shoulders and pins him back, shouting right into his\r\n\tface.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tLEAVE US ALONE, WHY DON'T YOU!!\r\n\r\n\tFor a split-second, BROWN's eyes flicker as he senses he\r\n\thas gone too far. A look of pure venom in BERTIE'S face,\r\n\tthen ...\r\n\r\n\tEXT. WINDSOR CASTLE, QUADRANGLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tWeeks later.\r\n\r\n\tIn a roar of hooves and wheels, the Royal Carriage sweeps\r\n\tinto the huge quadrangle. JOHN BROWN stands rigid on the\r\n\tbox, glowering at all the world.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"WINDSOR\"\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, SERVANT'S CORRIDOR - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tA pair of doors open out onto a torchlit driveway as a mass\r\n\tof SERVANTS rush in and out, ferrying bags an trunks.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN marches in, still charged-up from the strain of the\r\n\tjourney's watchfulness. He spots an UNDER-PORTER snatching\r\n\ta break.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou! What's your business here?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tUNDER-PORTER\r\n\t\t\t(jumping to)\r\n\t\tUnder-porter, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWell, don't stand where you shouldn't!\r\n\r\n\tThe UNDER-PORTER scrambles up the stairs. A few SERVANTS\r\n\texchange looks. BROWN seems more determined than ever to\r\n\texert his control.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. WINDSOR CASTLE, STABLES - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThat night.\r\n\r\n\tCarrying an old storm lamp high over his head, BROWN walks\r\n\ttowards the stables.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is on horseback, riding with VICTORIA through the\r\n\tgrounds. He is still jumpy, eyes flicking left and right,\r\n\tsearching for intruders. They are being followed at a\r\n\tdistance by two EQUERRIES on horseback. VICTORIA frowns\r\n\tpeevishly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMust they always follow us?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI ordered it. It's for your own\r\n\t\tsafety.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tDear me, you'll be telling me to watch\r\n\t\twhat I eat next.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN doesn't react. A beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tAm I not safe enough with you, John?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye.\r\n\t\t\t(looking away)\r\n\t\tBut there are Fenians reported on the\r\n\t\tmainland.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(tutting irritably)\r\n\t\tThe threat from the Irish is greatly\r\n\t\texaggerated, I'm sure.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(snapping back)\r\n\t\tI'll decide when it's exaggerated.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN chucks his horse on, bringing a firm halt to the\r\n\tconversation. A beat. He pulls up suddenly, staring at\r\n\tthe shadows in the copse.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tIs anything the matter, John?\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tJohn?\r\n\r\n\tHe stares for along moment and then lets it go.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNothing's the matter.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, STABLES - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN marches down the line of horse boxes. A stable-lad,\r\n\tBARNEY, is feeding the horses. He looks twitchy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHey, Barney.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBARNEY\r\n\t\tMr Brown, sir --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt's cold out there tonight, Barney.\r\n\r\n\tReaching his pony, BROWN stops and smiles. The animal\r\n\tlifts its face to him and he softly strokes his muzzle.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tYeah, there's a good girl.\r\n\t\t\t(to Barney)\r\n\t\tHave you had a look at this hoof? She\r\n\t\twas limping badly. I think there\r\n\t\tmight be a stone in it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBARNEY\r\n\t\tYeah, yeah, I did.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tGood man. And is she all right?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBARNEY\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tGood. She's a good girl. Aren't you? \r\n\t\tYeah, she's a lovely girl. And you\r\n\t\tknow the Queen's riding tomorrow?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBARNEY\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tAre you all right, Barney?\r\n\r\n\tBARNEY twitches again and BROWN realizes too late. The\r\n\tsplit-second he turns, he sees THREE MEN.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tOh, aye...\r\n\r\n\tThe MEN pile onto him and he collapses under their weight.\r\n\r\n\tAs he falls, BROWN manages to yank himself round, bang up a\r\n\tfist and fling the others off him. But the FIRST MAN is up\r\n\tagain, twisting an arm round his neck and tugging him back. \r\n\tThe others grapple his arms down, but BROWN is incredibly\r\n\tstrong. Even now, grunting and scrabbling, he makes them\r\n\tfight to force him back. BARNEY stands transfixed in\r\n\thorror.\r\n\r\n\tDumping BROWN against the wall, the men step back and start\r\n\tkicking the shit out of him. BROWN curls into a ball, jaw\r\n\tlocked, hands over his head. Not a sound.\r\n\r\n\tFinally, they back off, panting hard. The FIRST MAN pulls\r\n\tout a bottle of whiskey, yanks back BROWN's head and forces\r\n\twhiskey down his throat. It spills over his face and\r\n\tdribbles down his neck.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, QUEEN'S SITTING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA is standing at the windows. The door opens and\r\n\tLADY ELY walks in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWell?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tMr Brown is unable to attend today.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tI believe he is unwell, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tUnwell?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tI understand he was in a fight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHas he been hurt?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tI believe not, ma'am. I understand --\r\n\t\the'd had rather too much to drink.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA walks away and steps behind her desk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou may go.\r\n\r\n\tLADY ELY bows and walks out. VICTORIA stares at the desk a\r\n\tmoment, then picks up her pen and tries to work. She\r\n\tcannot.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, BROWN'S QUARTERS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN sits on the edge of the bed in only his\r\n\tundergarments. His face, arms, legs and fingers are livid\r\n\twith bruises, but he sits there, stiff-backed and gritting\r\n\this teeth, while ARCHIE crouches in front of him, tending\r\n\tto his wounds.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAnd she sent no word down?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tThey said you were drunk.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tWhy don't you tell her the truth?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe'll think it's her fault for\r\n\t\tkeeping me.\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE completes one of the dressings when BROWN suddenly\r\n\treaches back and starts trying to put on his shirt.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tWhat are you doing?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm getting dressed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tYou've got three broken ribs, man!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI've got my duties to attend to.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tDon't be an idiot! You're in no fit\r\n\t\tstate to go anywhere.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe'll be worried about me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tShe'll get over it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI can't let her down now, Archie.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tAnd when was the last time she put\r\n\t\therself out for you? Look, John,\r\n\t\twhatever she says to you now, in the\r\n\t\tend you're still a servant.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tOh, I'm much more than that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tAye, she may say that to you, but the\r\n\t\twoman can say what she wants.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou watch your tongue.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tCome on, man, I'm telling you what you\r\n\t\talready know.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou know nothing about her!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tWhen are you gonna see it, John? She\r\n\t\tdoesn't give a damn about you.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN lunges for the bedside drawer and pulls out a card\r\n\tshowing a coy picture of a pretty woman. He holds it up,\r\n\teyes blazing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tFrom the Queen!\r\n\r\n\tHe reads out the inscription.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tMy lips may give a message better of\r\n\t\tChristmas love than e'en this letter.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tTo my best friend, J.B. from his best\r\n\t\tfriend, V.R.\r\n\t\t\t(he thrusts it in his\r\n\t\t\t brother's face)\r\n\t\tBest friend!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tAye.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe means it.\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE stares at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tShe'll drop you. When she's done with\r\n\t\tyou, she'll drop you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tGet out.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tOut!\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE steps back but BROWN roars at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tOUT!!\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE steps outside and BROWN is left alone.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, QUEEN'S SITTING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day. VICTORIA sits at her desk. PONSONBY hands\r\n\ther letters to sign.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\t... to be followed by a visit from\r\n\t\tLady Bridport. She is keen to secure\r\n\t\ta place for her niece as Maid of\r\n\t\tHonor.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA signs the last letter and sits back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI am tired.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY coughs.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThere is one other matter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhat is it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tI have a letter, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tFrom whom?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tFrom Princess Helena and other members\r\n\t\tof your family.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(stiffening defensively)\r\n\t\tMy family is quite capable of\r\n\t\tcommunicating with the Queen in\r\n\t\tperson.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY does not reply. Finally, VICTORIA is obliged to\r\n\task.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWhat do they want?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThey are demanding the dismissal of\r\n\t\tJohn Brown on grounds of drunkeness.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stares through the window, expressionless.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, CHAPEL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA walks through the ornate chapel, nervously\r\n\tfingering her handkerchief. Waiting for her, smiling\r\n\tsoftly, is the Dean of Windsor, DEAN WELLSELLY.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tYou wished to see me, ma'am?\r\n\r\n\tShe holds his eyes for a moment, then nods.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, CHAPEL - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, VICTORIA and DEAN WELLSELLY are seated\r\n\tin a corner of the chapel, talking softly. She cannot\r\n\tbring herself to look at him and so does not notice how\r\n\tcarefully he is watching her throughout the interview. \r\n\tThis is incredibly hard for her to say, but she struggles\r\n\tto be as honest as possible.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tMy husband tried always to make me\r\n\t\tthink more subtly. Of course he\r\n\t\ttaught me so much and I can never\r\n\t\trepay my debt to him, or the love I\r\n\t\tfeel, even now. But, in truth, I\r\n\t\tthink I am someone who can only feel\r\n\t\tthings while they are alive to me. \r\n\t\tFor that reason, I know I do not have\r\n\t\ta subtle mind. I know that. But I\r\n\t\twork hard and I try to do my duty.\r\n\t\t\t(she hesitates; she is\r\n\t\t\t struggling now)\r\n\t\tHowever, I have noticed of late that\r\n\t\tmy feelings of grief are not so strong\r\n\t\tand -- that I find myself leaning more\r\n\t\tupon the comfort of living friends.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tFriends close to me now.\r\n\r\n\tShe stops herself. She is crying. DEAN WELLSELLY watches\r\n\ther a moment, then speaks close, choosing his words\r\n\tcarefully.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\t\tYour Majesty, a settled resignation is\r\n\t\tmore lasting proof of affection than\r\n\t\tactive grief. If the good Lord sees\r\n\t\tfit to bring one into contact with\r\n\t\tcongenial fellow beings, one should\r\n\t\tnot analyze one's reaction too deeply. \r\n\t\tTo allow oneself to be comforted by\r\n\t\tsomeone else need not imply any\r\n\t\tdisloyalty to the memory of the loved\r\n\t\tone.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. VICTORIA stares into the long, dark chapel. \r\n\tGradually, as she takes in the tone of his remarks, her\r\n\tdisappointment turns to anger.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, QUEEN'S SITTING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day, VICTORIA stands at the far window and her\r\n\tback to the room. Lined up against the wall are BERTIE and\r\n\this siblings.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tSir Henry.\r\n\r\n\tPONSONBY steps forward.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tMa'am?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tPlease tell the Princess, and other\r\n\t\tsignatories to this letter, that the\r\n\t\tQueen will not be dictated to, or made\r\n\t\tto alter, in any way, what she has\r\n\t\tfound to answer for her comfort.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tDo I make myself clear?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tMa'am.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou may go.\r\n\r\n\tThey all file out.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few days later.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN and VICTORIA are riding on horseback. Although\r\n\tbetter than he was, BROWN'S face is still badly bruised. \r\n\tThey turn a corner banked by trees. BROWN is watching the\r\n\tQUEEN closely. She stops.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI would like to get down.\r\n\r\n\tWithout a word, BROWN dismounts and helps her off her\r\n\thorse.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tJohn?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI was told you were in a fight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHas someone seen to those bruises?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYes, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tMa'am?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYes?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHaving considered my position here at\r\n\t\tcourt, I have come to the conclusion\r\n\t\tthat it is in the best interest of\r\n\t\tYour Majesty that I should resign.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI do not accept.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI had foreseen that you would not. \r\n\t\tBut Your Majesty should understand --\r\n\t\tthat my mind will not be changed in\r\n\t\tthis. I leave for Deeside --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in)\r\n\t\tThe Queen forbids it.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI cannot allow it because I cannot\r\n\t\tlive without you. Without you, I\r\n\t\tcannot find the strength to be who I\r\n\t\tmust be. Please.\r\n\r\n\tShe takes his hand to her mouth and kisses it gently, then\r\n\tlooks at him, utterly helpless.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tPromise me you won't let them send me\r\n\t\tback.\r\n\r\n\tA long silence. BROWN holds her hand tight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI promise.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"1868\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOWLANDS - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few weeks later.\r\n\r\n\tA tiny horse-drawn carriage creeps across a huge Highland\r\n\tlandscape.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (V.O.)\r\n\t\tYesterday, Gladstone talked for three\r\n\t\thours on the Irish Church Bill ... I\r\n\t\tam as guilty as the rest of\r\n\t\tunderestimating his reforming zeal.\r\n\t\tTory days may be numbered, but I fancy\r\n\t\tthere yet remains one last hope of\r\n\t\tdeliverance. Wheresoever the blame\r\n\t\tlies, we must now close ranks and\r\n\t\tdefend Mrs Brown's England. As for my\r\n\t\tinterminable journey to the land of\r\n\t\tCalvin, oatcakes and sulphur ...\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI hurries through the pouring rain.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (O.S.)\r\n\t\t... no Prime Minister made greater\r\n\t\tsacrifice than attempting to run the\r\n\t\tcountry six hundred miles north of\r\n\t\tcivilization.\r\n\r\n\tReaching the castle, he hurries inside and the great doors\r\n\tbang behind him.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, QUEEN'S DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day.\r\n\r\n\tQUEEN VICTORIA is playing the piano like she walks, with\r\n\tgreat vim and vigor. The tune is some quaint Scottish\r\n\tballad which she belts out in her clear strong voice,\r\n\talmost drowning out PRINCE ARTHUR, PRINCE LOUISE and PRINCE\r\n\tLEOPOLD who are meant to be accompanying her. They stand\r\n\tin a nervous semi-circle, fumbling their harmonies. \r\n\tIgnoring them completely, VICTORIA bobs up her head with a\r\n\tquizzical smile to make sure she is being appreciated.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI and the rest of the HOUSEHOLD stand a few yards\r\n\toff, smiling rigidly. DISRAELI, the consummate politician\r\n\tto his inch-high insteps, out-smiles the lot of them. This\r\n\tman is in raptures of delight. And the more liquid his\r\n\tsmiles, the happier he makes VICTORIA. He beams, she\r\n\tbelts, until her children are drowned out completely.\r\n\r\n\tAnd then, with characteristic suddenness, VICTORIA stops\r\n\tplaying and launches into one of her tirades. The\r\n\tHOUSEHOLD wobbles in shock like children on a switch-back,\r\n\tbut DISRAELI glides smoothly from delight to sober concern.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHow dare the Irish break with the\r\n\t\tAnglicans? \r\n\t\tIf Albert were alive today he would\r\n\t\tnever allow the Crown to give up\r\n\t\tChurch patronage. No, the Irish must\r\n\t\tbe told, very firmly, to stay exactly\r\n\t\twhere they are. It is the thin edge\r\n\t\tof the wedge, Mr Disraeli. Next, you\r\n\t\twill be telling me that the Crown no\r\n\t\tlonger governs this nation.\r\n\r\n\tA beat. A nervous silence in the Household.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tYour Majesty remains at the very\r\n\t\tepicenter of governance. As for your\r\n\t\tpeople, look no further than the sales\r\n\t\tof your Highland Journals to see in\r\n\t\twhat affection the nation holds their\r\n\t\tQueen.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou sell even more copies than Mr\r\n\t\tDickens.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tBut I lack your prose, Mr Disraeli.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA gives him a tiny smile. DISRAELI acknowledges it,\r\n\tthen steers the conversation back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tOf course I understand your concern. \r\n\t\tYou miss your people.\r\n\t\t\t(a pause)\r\n\t\tAnd they miss you.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA registers a slight flicker of defensiveness at the\r\n\timplied criticism.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThen they may read about me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tIndeed, and for that they are\r\n\t\teternally grateful.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tIs that not enough?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tIn so many ways ... and yet it is your\r\n\t\tpresence they crave. A figurehead.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA has the measure of him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI never thought to be bullied by you,\r\n\t\tMr Disraeli. You, I thought,\r\n\t\tunderstood a widow's grief.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tForgive me, ma'am, I cannot speak for\r\n\t\tthe nation, only for myself. As Prime\r\n\t\tMinister I confess I miss your\r\n\t\tpresence, but that is only an\r\n\t\texpression of my own selfish desires\r\n\t\tand I should not burden you with it.\r\n\r\n\tThe Household waits. Has he clawed himself back? VICTORIA\r\n\tacknowledges his apology. Her voice drops and she talks\r\n\tdirectly to DISRAELI, straight from the heart.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI stay here because I am happy.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tIs that such a terrible crime?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tNo, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tAt this moment the far door opens and BROWN walks in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tTime for your walk.\r\n\r\n\tWithout a word, VICTORIA rises from her chair and starts\r\n\tfollowing him out. As they pass DISRAELI, she stops.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThis is my good John Brown.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(taking him in)\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI have asked him to show you a little\r\n\t\tof Highland life while you are with us\r\n\t\tat Balmoral.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN measures DISRAELI suspiciously.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat brings you here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tA man can refuse only so many\r\n\t\tinvitations from his Queen. It was\r\n\t\tremiss of me not to come earlier.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA smiles. BROWN stares.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat do you know about the Highlands?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI am a blank sheet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tDo you hunt?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tOccasionally.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tDare say you can be taught.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tTo shoot perhaps, but not to kill.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf you hunt, you kill.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI counters effortlessly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWell then, I'll do my best.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. HIGHLANDS, GLEN GELDER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tStaying close to the ground we develop through a series of\r\n\tshots showing the other highlands -- sheet rain against\r\n\theather and gorse, rivulets of water slashing through mud,\r\n\tcrude pathways sliding in wind and all ball-breakingly\r\n\tcold.\r\n\r\n\tComing up the hill, we begin to make out a hunting party. \r\n\tThe sound first. Like a small army, crashing their way up\r\n\tthe winding path. GHILLIES urging on their horses and\r\n\tdogs, guns and equipment jangling off pony-hacks an then\r\n\tthe tall figure of JOHN BROWN striding out in front.\r\n\r\n\tMaking no concession to anyone, he force-marches them up\r\n\tthe hill, eyes on the hunt ahead. Behind them trot the men\r\n\ton horseback -- DISRAELI, PONSONBY, BERTIE and other\r\n\tGENTLEMEN, each led by GHILLIES and ATTENDANTS, among them\r\n\tARCHIE.\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly, BROWN stops and raises a hand. The party halts.\r\n\r\n\tHe listens for a second. Satisfied that he has found his\r\n\tquarry, he brings his hand down and the party of gentlemen\r\n\tdismount as quietly as they can.\r\n\r\n\tAs he waits, BROWN winces slightly from the pain in his\r\n\tside. He pulls a flask of whiskey from his sporran and\r\n\tdrinks. All the time, DISRAELI keeps his eyes on BROWN.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. HIGHLANDS, GLEN GELDER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe stalking.\r\n\r\n\tEveryone is now fanned out along the hillside, a ghillie to\r\n\teach gentleman, slowly and silently moving up the hill.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI stalks with BROWN, panting hard to keep up, eyes\r\n\ton his man, trying to make no sound.\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly, BROWN stops. Very slowly he rises. DISRAELI\r\n\trides alongside and sees ...\r\n\r\n\tA huge stag staring majestically across the hillside.\r\n\r\n\tKeeping his movements smooth and slow, BROWN brings up his\r\n\trifle, cocks it and offers DISRAELI the kill. With a\r\n\tdeferential gesture of the hands, DISRAELI declines. BROWN\r\n\tstares at him a split-second, raises the rifle to his\r\n\tshoulder and fires.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. HIGHLANDS, GLEN GELDER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe kill.\r\n\r\n\tA rapid montage of guns firing, as we cut to ...\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN sweeps in from the hunt, DISRAELI dripping at his\r\n\tside.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(demonstrating with his\r\n\t\t\t rifle)\r\n\t\tAlways remember, you keep it tight to\r\n\t\tyour shoulder, you absorb the kick. \r\n\t\tAim for the head. Then imagine it's\r\n\t\tGladstone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(smiling)\r\n\t\tQuite.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN pulls out his flask and offers some to DISRAELI, who\r\n\tdeclines. He watches BROWN take a long swig.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, UPPER SERVANT'S TABLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThat night.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is standing at his place, drinking steadily. He has\r\n\ta sheet of paper and a pen and is ticking off a list. \r\n\tLined up in front of him, trying desperately not to laugh,\r\n\tare five or six UPPER SERVANTS including the pretty\r\n\tASSISTANT DRESSER and BERTIE'S VALET. They each step up,\r\n\tone at a time, to make their report.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(ticking as he goes)\r\n\t\t... Back doors, West Wing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tUPPER SERVANT 1\r\n\t\tChecked and locked, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSide doors, East Wing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\tChecked and locked, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tLouder, girl!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tASSISTANT DRESSER\r\n\t\t\t(creasing up)\r\n\t\tChecked and locked, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tKitchen and lower house.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\tChecked and locked, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tBack and upper corridors.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tUPPER SERVANT 2\r\n\t\tChecked and locked, sir.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tFront door.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tChecked and locked.\r\n\r\n\tFolding up the paper, BROWN downs his glass of whiskey and\r\n\tsits. On his nod, dinner is served by UNDER SERVANTS amid\r\n\ta clatter of cutlery and chat.\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE looks across at his brother but BROWN is hunched\r\n\tover his plate, pecking at his food.\r\n\r\n\tSomeone titters and ARCHIE looks up. BERTIE'S VALET\r\n\tcoughs. BROWN slowly lifts his head. His eyes have the\r\n\tslightly unfocused look of too much drink. It is clear to\r\n\tARCHIE that he is about to be sent-up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET\r\n\t\t\t(with a smug smile)\r\n\t\tDid you see any Irish assassins today,\r\n\t\tMr Brown?\r\n\r\n\tBrown doesn't react.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWe heard the dogs were Fenian\r\n\t\tsympathizers.\r\n\r\n\tBrown drinks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE'S VALET (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tOr was it the stag ...?\r\n\r\n\tEveryone bursts out laughing. Brown slams down his glass.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThere's not a soul here cares about\r\n\t\tthat wee woman's safety except me! \r\n\t\tShe'd die in a ditch if I wasn't there\r\n\t\tto look out for her --\r\n\r\n\tHe stops. ARCHIE has come across to his brother's chair\r\n\tand pulls gently on his arm.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares at the SERVANTS. Everyone is about to burst\r\n\tout laughing. Keeping his dignity, he pushes back his\r\n\tchair and lets ARCHIE lead him away.\r\n\r\n\tAs BROWN reaches the double doors, the laughter hits him in\r\n\tthe back like a wave. ARCHIE holds him steady.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, BROWN'S QUARTERS - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is lying on a grubby bed. ARCHIE is looking around\r\n\tthe untidy room. For the first time, he notices a thick\r\n\tmanuscript on the table. BROWN follows his eyes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tWhat's this?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt's a diary.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tBe careful who sees it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhat do you take me for?\r\n\r\n\tARCHIE turns back to BROWN.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tYou should have someone look after\r\n\t\tyou.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm all right. I just need to rest up\r\n\t\ta wee bit.\r\n\t\t\t(feeling everything spin)\r\n\t\tThe room ... You don't have to stay.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN shuts his eyes and starts to drift. ARCHIE watches\r\n\tover him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tThe place is a mess.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI can't move to tidy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tIt's what the maids are for.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm not having some prattler going\r\n\t\tthrough my things.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tARCHIE\r\n\t\tWon't you give yourself a rest, John? \r\n\t\tShe's other people to look out for\r\n\t\ther.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe needs me, Archie. She canna do\r\n\t\twithout me, she said it to my face.\r\n\t\t\t(his hands come up to cover\r\n\t\t\t his eyes)\r\n\t\tHow can I stop now?\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, SERVANT'S CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tDawn the next morning.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is scrambling into his jacket as he hurries down the\r\n\tstairs.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN crashes out of a side-door -- just fully dressed --\r\n\tto be met by the smiling figure of DISRAELI. He is got up\r\n\tin smart walking boots, plus-fours and a tweed jacket.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tYou sent for me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI've been called back to London. My\r\n\t\tlast day. I thought I might take a\r\n\t\twalk on Lochnagar.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares straight back.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCHNAGER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tAn hour later, BROWN leads DISRAELI up the hill. BROWN has\r\n\this head down, on with the job. DISRAELI slows to a halt.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tPrinces and Lords are but the breath\r\n\t\tof kings, An honest man's the noblest\r\n\t\twork of God.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tYou must miss such magnificent views.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI don't think about it.\r\n\r\n\tThey reach the top and continue along the high ground. \r\n\tDISRAELI glances at BROWN and notices the limp.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tForgive me, I've called you out and\r\n\t\tyou should have been resting.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm fine.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tYou're injured.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIt's nothing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tStill, someone must attend you. Your\r\n\t\twife should not have let you out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm not married.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t\t(deadpan)\r\n\t\tOh.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThis is the top.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI admires the view for a moment, then continues.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tI confess, I sometimes feel as if I am\r\n\t\tnot married myself, I see my wife so\r\n\t\tlittle. But I'm forgetting the\r\n\t\trewards.\r\n\r\n\tHe looks across. BROWN keeps staring ahead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tThe look on their faces when one walks\r\n\t\tinto the room. Still gives one a\r\n\t\tridiculous thrill.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI wouldn't know.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tSurely --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(interrupts)\r\n\t\tWhat I do, I do for my Queen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tWas there never ambition?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tMaybe, once.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThen I envy yo.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhy?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tTo have achieved one's ambition, or to\r\n\t\thave reconciled oneself to its limits,\r\n\t\tis a lifetime's work.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI do what I do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tFor Her Majesty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tAye.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tBut yourself?\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tWhat about John Brown?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI said.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI serve the Queen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tNo other aspiration?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares for a long moment. Finally he speaks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tTo see her safe.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI steps a little closer.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tYou will not be unaware of the threat\r\n\t\tnow posed by Republicanism.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWhy do you think I keep her here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tAh, but therein lies the paradox. It\r\n\t\tis her very isolation that encourages\r\n\t\tthe malcontents. The longer she is\r\n\t\taway, the stronger they become; and\r\n\t\twho, honestly, can promise security\r\n\t\tagainst that? However many doors you\r\n\t\tlock, someone will always get in. \r\n\t\tEven here.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN watches him, eyes alert.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSo...?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThe truth is, the Queen would be safer\r\n\t\tdoing her duty and returning south to\r\n\t\ther public. John Bull loves her and\r\n\t\tJohn Bull is her best defense.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tHer mind is set. She won't change\r\n\t\tnow.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tShe trusts you, John.\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI is right on his shoulder now, like his own voice.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThey don't see it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tSee what?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tThe threat.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI tell them, but they don't see it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThey aren't as watchful as you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tToo busy looking after themselves.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tThe greasy pole.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNo loyalty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tNo love.\r\n\r\n\tSilence. For a moment BROWN seems unaware that someone\r\n\telse has said that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI promised to protect her from people\r\n\t\tlike you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tFor once in my life, I am not the\r\n\t\tissue.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe'll never understand it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tIn time, she will.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tShe'll think I betrayed her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\tBut others will know that you acted\r\n\t\tfor the greater good.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stares off into the distance.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. LOCH MUICK - DAY\r\n\r\n\tThe next day.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN is rowing VICTORIA across the loch. The EQUERRIES\r\n\twait on the shore.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA trails her hand in the water, frowning at the\r\n\tsurface. BROWN concentrates on the oars, slipping them\r\n\tcarefully through the water. \r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI received a letter today from Mr\r\n\t\tDisraeli. Parliament is calling for\r\n\t\tmy return to public duties.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tWhy won't they let us be?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN does not answer.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tHe insists that the country expects me\r\n\t\tto preside over the opening of the new\r\n\t\tsession. I refuse to offer sustenance\r\n\t\tto enable his weakening grip. \r\n\t\tBesides, you know how much I should\r\n\t\thate it. It frightens me.\r\n\r\n\tShe notices that BROWN has said nothing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tJohn?\r\n\r\n\tBROWN does not look at her. Finally:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tWe can't always have what we wish.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stares at him.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, QUEEN'S DRAWING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tLater that day.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA and BROWN are in the middle of a blazing row in\r\n\tfront of the entire Household, including PONSONBY, JENNER\r\n\tand LADY ELY.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tDuty?! You talk about duty?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tIf duty and safety are served by the\r\n\t\tsame end then, aye, I do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI cannot believe you are saying this? \r\n\t\tYou, who I have relied on all this\r\n\t\ttime --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in)\r\n\t\tHave I ever let you down before--?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(as if he had not spoken)\r\n\t\t-- You stand there and tell me it is\r\n\t\tmy duty ... after all you promised me!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tI'm breaking no promises!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou are forcing me to do the very\r\n\t\tthing you know I fear most!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tFor god's sake, woman, I'm just trying\r\n\t\tto keep you safe!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI will not hear any more about my\r\n\t\tsafety!! You made me a promise and\r\n\t\tnow you have broken it!\r\n\r\n\tBROWN rounds on her, deeply wounded.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t-- When I took you out riding, come\r\n\t\train or shine, because I knew it was\r\n\t\tright for you, when I kept the bairns\r\n\t\toff your back so you could have a bit\r\n\t\tof peace, when I saw you safe from\r\n\t\thome to home and you didn't even know\r\n\t\tI was there...! All I've ever thought\r\n\t\tabout is you!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThen why send me back to them?!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tBecause I have to!\r\n\t\t\t(pause\r\n\t\tWill you no listen to me, woman?\r\n\r\n\tFace turned from him, VICTORIA replies in a brittle voice.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tDo not presume to talk to your Queen\r\n\t\tin that manner.\r\n\r\n\tA long silence. BROWN watches her, but she will not look\r\n\tat him again. Finally, she walks very slowly across the\r\n\troom. She turns in the doorway, her voice faltering\r\n\tslightly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tDoctor Jenner, I feel unwell. I shall\r\n\t\tretire to my chamber. Please attend\r\n\t\tme presently.\r\n\r\n\tAs the door slams, we ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"NOVEMBER\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few weeks later.\r\n\r\n\tClose on a door as it opens. The ROYAL FAMILY are eating\r\n\tlunch with members of the UPPER HOUSEHOLD. VICTORIA walks\r\n\tin with LADY ELY.\r\n\r\n\tA great scraping of chairs as everyone drops their forks\r\n\tand stands. Clearly, they were not expecting her. In\r\n\tsilence, VICTORIA steps up and takes her place at the head\r\n\tof the table.\r\n\r\n\tAt last, PONSONBY leans forward deferentially.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tMay I say, how glad I am to see Your\r\n\t\tMajesty so much recovered.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA nods, then turns and looks about at the others. \r\n\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA is seated at the far end of the table. \r\n\tVICTORIA frowns.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhere is my son?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA\r\n\t\tPrince Albert is at Windsor, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy is he not here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA\r\n\t\tHe is sick, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tThen why are you not with him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA\r\n\t\tYou ordered all members of the Royal\r\n\t\tFamily to attend you at Balmoral.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhat is the matter with him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA\r\n\t\tHe has typhoid fever, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stares blankly at DOCTOR JENNER.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tNo. You are mistaken. Prince Albert,\r\n\t\tmy husband, had typhoid fever. I\r\n\t\tasked what was wrong with my son.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tThe same, your Majesty.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA stops. She stares down the length of the table. \r\n\tA long pause.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy was I not informed?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tI did not consider it wise, in the\r\n\t\tcircumstances, to tax your nerves.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tHow ill is he?\r\n\r\n\tNo answer.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\t\t(to Alexandra)\r\n\t\tAlex?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tHe is not well, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI must go to him.\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly, VICTORIA stands. Chairs bang back as everyone\r\n\tleaps to their feet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWe must leave at once.\r\n\r\n\tAbruptly, VICTORIA turns for the door and the room erupts\r\n\tinto activity.\r\n\r\n\tINT. BALMORAL CASTLE, CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tBROWN stands in the corridor, a little nonplussed by the\r\n\tservants and Householders hurrying about in every\r\n\tdirection.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. BALMORAL CASTLE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tHalf an hour later, BROWN races up to the Queen's carriage\r\n\tamid a swarm of servants, ladies' maids and Householders\r\n\trushing to be ready in time.\r\n\r\n\tSuddenly the huge castle doors open and VICTORIA bustles\r\n\tout with her entourage in tow. BROWN -- only just in time \r\n\t- yanks open the door for VICTORIA to step past him and\r\n\ttake her place. She ignores him completely.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN slams the doors. As he looks up, he sees his brother\r\n\tARCHIE staring at him from across the courtyard. For a\r\n\tsecond the two brothers hold each other's gaze. It's\r\n\tobvious that ARCHIE has noticed the Queen's indifference. \r\n\tBROWN turns away and mounts the box as the carriage races\r\n\taway under him.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, PRINCE'S BEDCHAMBER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tSome days later. A tableau.\r\n\r\n\tQUEEN VICTORIA sits at the foot of the bed, a matriarch\r\n\tsurrounded by her ROYAL FAMILY. They watch DOCTOR JENNER\r\n\tbend to examine the ghostly figure of BERTIE. He listens\r\n\tfor a pulse. Finally, he looks up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tBetter.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA lets out a deep breath. She takes hold of\r\n\tPRINCESS ALEXANDRA'S hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tShould the good Lord see fit to spare\r\n\t\tmy son, I will order a mass to be\r\n\t\tcelebrated at St. George's. The\r\n\t\tpeople must share with their Queen,\r\n\t\ther prayers and hopes for their future\r\n\t\tKing.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, CORRIDOR OUTSIDE BEDCHAMBER - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA few minutes later, BROWN stands in the corridor when the\r\n\tdoor bursts open and VICTORIA marches straight past him\r\n\twith PONSONBY at her side.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\t\t(aside to BROWN)\r\n\t\tThe Queen will be riding to St.\r\n\t\tGeorge's on the fifth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\t\t(launching straight in)\r\n\t\tI recommend Her Majesty uses the\r\n\t\tcovered carriage with a full Horse\r\n\t\tGuard. In the event of any\r\n\t\tdisturbance I will ensure --\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(cutting in)\r\n\t\tI will ride to St. George's in an open\r\n\t\tcarriage. It is time the Queen was\r\n\t\tseen by her public.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA turns and disappears down the corridor, followed\r\n\tby PONSONBY. We linger on BROWN'S humiliation, closer and\r\n\tcloser until ...\r\n\r\n\tEXT. WINDSOR CASTLE, ST. GEORGE'S - DAY\r\n\r\n\tSome weeks later.\r\n\r\n\tA series of angles on BROWN as he walks amid the mass of\r\n\tonlookers pressing against a cordon of guards surrounding\r\n\tthe cathedral. All the time, his eyes flick left and\r\n\tright, searching the faces in front of him for potential\r\n\tassassins. Over his intense watchfulness we hear ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDEAN WELLSELLY (O.S.)\r\n\t\t... praise and magnify thy glorious\r\n\t\tname for that thou has raised thy\r\n\t\tservant Albert Edward, Prince of Wales\r\n\t\tfrom the bed of sickness. \r\n\t\tWe pray thee to perfect the recovery\r\n\t\tof thy servant and to crown him day by\r\n\t\tday with more abundant blessings both\r\n\t\tfor body and soul, through Jesus\r\n\t\tChrist our Lord ...\r\n\r\n\tThe CONGREGATION mutters a vast ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tCONGREGATION (O.S.)\r\n\t\tAmen.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. WINDSOR CASTLE, ST. GEORGE'S - DAY\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA and other members of the ROYAL FAMILY walk down\r\n\tthe steps towards the cheering crowd. As DEAN WELLSELLY\r\n\tand BROWN follow, BROWN sees ARTHUR O'CONNER break from the\r\n\tonlookers, pulling out a gun. BROWN yells out:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tNO!!\r\n\r\n\tHe races toward O'CONNER and hits him flying, bangs him to\r\n\tthe ground and twists the gun out of his hand. As they\r\n\tfall we hear laughter and:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE (O.S.)\r\n\t\tSo there he is, Arthur O'Conner...\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, DINING HALL - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tIt's a few days later and BERTIE is entertaining a private\r\n\tdinner party. They include QUEEN VICTORIA, PRINCESS\r\n\tALEXANDRA, PRINCESS LOUISE and HENRY PONSONBY. BROWN is in\r\n\tattendance. He stands off to one side, near the door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\t\t(bristling with confidence)\r\n\t\t... all seven stone of the man,\r\n\t\tpaddling madly towards us through a\r\n\t\tsea of Horse Guards, waving something\r\n\t\tthat looks vaguely like a pen. I\r\n\t\tthought he must be one of the mother's\r\n\t\tardent readership in search of the\r\n\t\tRoyal indenture...\r\n\r\n\tMore chortling. VICTORIA watches her son, smiling proudly. \r\n\tBROWN looks straight ahead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI believe I saw him first and then\r\n\t\talerted Brown. I'm not convinced that\r\n\t\the wasn't taking a snooze on top of\r\n\t\tthe box. Anyway, we had our man\r\n\t\tpinned down and I must say, Brown\r\n\t\tacquitted himself admirably. Of\r\n\t\tcourse the gun was a fake, but all the\r\n\t\tsame, it was well done.\r\n\r\n\tNo-one registers BROWN. But while VICTORIA does not look\r\n\tat him, she is acutely aware of his presence.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tI intend Brown to be rewarded with a\r\n\t\tspecial medal cast in gold. It will\r\n\t\tbe called The Devoted Service Medal.\r\n\r\n\tThe guests applaud politely. BERTIE clinks his glass for\r\n\tattention and raises it high.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBERTIE\r\n\t\tA toast. Victoria Regina!\r\n\r\n\tThe others raise their glasses in unison.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tEVERYONE\r\n\t\tVictoria Regina!\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA smiles. BROWN remains alone by the door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThe people of England have expressed\r\n\t\tin a manner which cannot be mistaken,\r\n\t\tthat they will uphold the ancient\r\n\t\tmonarchy of England ...\r\n\r\n\tINT. CRYSTAL PALACE - DAY\r\n\r\n\tDISRAELI is delivering his come-back speech at a banquet of\r\n\tTory delegates.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tDISRAELI\r\n\t\t... If the first great object of the\r\n\t\tTory Party is to maintain the\r\n\t\tinstitutions of the country, the\r\n\t\tsecond is, in my opinion, to maintain\r\n\t\tthe Empire of England ... the\r\n\t\thereditary, the traditionary policy of\r\n\t\tthe Tory Party. Go to your homes,\r\n\t\tteach them these truths, which will\r\n\t\tsoon be imprinted on the conscience of\r\n\t\tthe land ...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE TO BLACK.\r\n\r\n\tCAPTION: \"1883\"\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\tFADE IN:\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, BROWN'S QUARTERS - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThe sound of rain driven hard against a window. We creep\r\n\tslowly down the corridor until we are back with the fifty\r\n\tyear-old BROWN. With his whiskey for company, he is\r\n\tsitting at his desk, writing in the diary.\r\n\r\n\tThe diary-manuscript is now falling apart with wear, but\r\n\tthere remain a few blank pages. Slowly, he fills them in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (V.O.)\r\n\t\tWe should not live in expectation of\r\n\t\tcontentment. Fifteen years of\r\n\t\tvigilance will not guarantee peace of\r\n\t\tmind. Yesterday, intruders were again\r\n\t\treported in the South Wing. I believe\r\n\t\tmy prompt arrival may have averted any\r\n\t\tcrisis, but it was a timely reminder. \r\n\t\tIt is a great comfort to me that my\r\n\t\tefforts in securing the Queen's safety\r\n\t\tover the years have not been in vain. \r\n\t\tCertainly Her Majesty sends me no word\r\n\t\tthat she's dissatisfied. And I feel\r\n\t\tsure that if she were unhappy she\r\n\t\twould have found the occasion to\r\n\t\tspeak to me in person, as she has so\r\n\t\toften done in the past.\r\n\r\n\tA knock at the door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWhat is it?\r\n\r\n\tWe hear a young PAGE, breathless from running.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPAGE\r\n\t\tNorth woods, sir.\r\n\r\n\tBROWN grabs his gun and rushes out.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. WINDSOR CASTLE, QUADRANGLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN appears at the door and strides into the storm. He\r\n\twalks quickly across the wide quadrangle, rain soaking his\r\n\thair and clothes.\r\n\r\n\tTwo GUARDS watch BROWN as he races out into the storm.\r\n\r\n\tA coin flips through the air to be caught by an\r\n\toutstretched hand. The second GUARD grins.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN races across the open ground towards the forest.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tAnd now we are back with the opening sequence. Truncated,\r\n\tsevere, and shot from a slightly different angle. The\r\n\tdriving rain, BROWN hurtling through the trees, the crack\r\n\tto his left, he spins and plunges on.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tClose-up on BROWN as he bangs against a tree, heaving for\r\n\tair. He searches the dark, stops, listens and races on.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tBROWN tears through the trees, pistol raised at full arm's\r\n\tlength.\r\n\r\n\tEXT. THE GROUNDS OF WINDSOR CASTLE, FOREST - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tHe bursts into a clearing, breaks to the centre and stops.\r\n\r\n\tPistol raised, he turns a circle, eyes on the wildly\r\n\tswaying trees. A branch snaps behind him. He spins round,\r\n\tbellows deep from his heart:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tGod save the Queen!!\r\n\r\n\tAnd fires.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, CORRIDOR - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tA few days later.\r\n\r\n\tVICTORIA is moving swiftly down a long corridor with LADY\r\n\tELY. They arrive at a door. VICTORIA stands facing it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\t\t(quietly)\r\n\t\tHow long has he been this sick?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tLADY ELY\r\n\t\tA few days, ma'am.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tWhy was I not told earlier?\r\n\r\n\tLADY ELY doesn't answer. VICTORIA knows anyway. She nods. \r\n\tLADY ELY knocks. The door is opened by a young UNDER\r\n\tSERVANT who gawps at the sight of Her Majesty standing here\r\n\tin the servant's quarters. VICTORIA walks in.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, BROWN'S QUARTERS - NIGHT\r\n\r\n\tThe room has been cleared of bottles, but the thinness of\r\n\tthe life here shocks her deeply. The cheap furniture, the\r\n\tanonymous prints, the bed and, finally, the sight of BROWN.\r\n\r\n\tHe is lying in bed, barely conscious. After a moment, he\r\n\topens his eyes and stares at her. She steps forward,\r\n\tsmiling nervously.\r\n\r\n\tHer voice is the old voice, between friends.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYou should never have gone out in such\r\n\t\tfoul weather.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tSomeone has to look after you.\r\n\t\t\t(pause)\r\n\t\tIt could've been someone. It was\r\n\t\tbefore.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA\r\n\t\tYes. Yes it was.\r\n\r\n\tHe cannot speak. It's difficult for her too, but she\r\n\tspeaks for him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tMy Ministers are as impertinent as\r\n\t\tever. Dispatches are now so numerous,\r\n\t\tthey come in a trunk. Sometimes I do\r\n\t\tbelieve they will never stop. Endless\r\n\t\tletters...\r\n\t\t \r\n\r\n\tHer voice falters. A pause\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tVICTORIA (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tI know I have not always been the\r\n\t\tloyal friend you deserved, John. And\r\n\t\tyet here I am now, even now, feeling\r\n\t\tdesperate at the thought of losing\r\n\t\tyou.\r\n\r\n\tShe starts to cry.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN\r\n\t\tDon't be silly, woman.\r\n\r\n\tHis old, familiar gruffness makes her smile and she pulls\r\n\therself together. Seeing a bowl of water on the side\r\n\ttable, she steps across. Carefully folding a cloth in\r\n\tfour, she rinses it in the water and gently wipes his face. \r\n\tLeaning closer, she is about to touch his face when BROWN\r\n\tgestures protectively.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tBROWN (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tNot too near.\r\n\r\n\tINT. WINDSOR CASTLE, CORRIDOR - DAY\r\n\r\n\tA week later. PONSONBY and JENNER stand at the window\r\n\toverlooking the grounds.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tErysipelas.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tNot too protracted, I hope.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\t\t(shakes his head)\r\n\t\tA few days...\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tWhen he heard, the Prince of Wales\r\n\t\tthrew the bust from the window of the\r\n\t\tRoyal Gallery. It took four hours to\r\n\t\tgather the fragments.\r\n\r\n\tA beat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tThe Queen wishes to publish an account\r\n\t\tof him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tDear oh dear.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tWe think she can be dissuaded.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tHave you had a glance at the diary?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tQuite.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tI think I'd best take it back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tOf course.\r\n\r\n\tHe brings out BROWN'S tatty diary-manuscript and hands it\r\n\tover to PONSONBY. The two men move away from the window,\r\n\tto go their separate ways. Daily business beckons.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER (CONT'D)\r\n\t\tWhere did you find it by the way?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tSome young page was boasting about\r\n\t\thaving seen it.\r\n\t\t\t(beat)\r\n\t\tLucky.\r\n\r\n\tJENNER nods.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tJENNER\r\n\t\tWell, no rest for the wicked, Henry.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tPONSONBY\r\n\t\tNo, indeed.\r\n\r\n\tThe two men head off in opposite directions down the\r\n\tcorridor.\r\n\r\n\r\n"
}
] |
https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/mrs_brown.html
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[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mulholland Drive' ?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\nThe work has been removed."
}
] |
https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/mulholland_drive.html
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[
{
"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'My Mother Dreams The Satan's Disciples in New York' ?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": " \"MY MOTHER DREAMS \r\n THE SATAN'S DISCIPLES IN NEW YORK\"\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n FADE IN:\r\n\r\n EXT. SOUTH DAKOTAN FARM - DAY\r\n\r\n A lone farmhouse sits isolated against a prairie backdrop,\r\n silhouetted by a marbled dawn sky.\r\n\r\n INT. FARMHOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\n MARIAN PETERSON, a gray-haired woman in her late sixties,\r\n meticulously packs a suitcase. She picks up a small, framed\r\n PHOTO from a chest-of-drawers and holds it up to her.\r\n\r\n INSERT - PHOTO\r\n\r\n It's a picture of a man about Marian's age. He has a sweet\r\n natured smile on his face. Marian looks at it longingly,\r\n then packs it carefully in her suitcase between some sweaters\r\n and closes it up.\r\n\r\n EXT. FARMHOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\n A paint-chipped truck rounds the corner on a dirt road\r\n leading into the farm.\r\n\r\n Marian, waiting on the porch, ready to go, rises and waves.\r\n\r\n A FEW MOMENTS LATER -\r\n\r\n Marian's son, STEVE, dressed in jeans and flannel shirt,\r\n loads his mother's single piece of luggage into the bed of\r\n the truck, climbs back into the cab, where his mother is\r\n sitting, and drives off.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. THE SKY - DAY\r\n\r\n A JETLINER descending in the hot, cerulean sky.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. KENNEDY INTERNATIONAL - AFTERNOON\r\n\r\n Marian, looking a little forlorn and out of sorts, stands out\r\n by the taxi area with her suitcase on a tote, looking around\r\n for a cab, unsure what to do.\r\n\r\n CURBSIDE - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\n MISCHA, a somewhat dissolute-looking Russian cabbie in his\r\n thirties, roughhouses Marian's single piece of luggage into\r\n the dirty, cluttered trunk of his cab.\r\n\r\n INT. TAXI - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian is sitting in the back of the cab as Mischa opens the\r\n driver's side door and slams it shut, rattling Marian's\r\n nerves.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n (brusquely)\r\n Where to?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Are you sure you got my bag in?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n What do you think? I left it on the\r\n curb?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I'm sorry, I'm a little nervous. It's my\r\n first time in New York. Just a minute.\r\n\r\n Marian fumbles with a piece of paper she's rooted out of her\r\n purse. \r\n\r\n Mischa, annoyed, slams the shift lever into Drive and lurches\r\n off.\r\n\r\n Marian leans forward into the rectangular opening of the\r\n Plexiglas partition.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I want to go to 526 East 5TH. That's in\r\n the East Village. My daughter said it\r\n would cost thirty dollars.\r\n\r\n In the REAR-VIEW MIRROR we glimpse Mischa giving Marian a sly\r\n look.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. LOCATION - DAY\r\n\r\n The TAXI passes on a turnpike, streaming with vehicles,\r\n headed toward Manhattan. DRIVE-BY TRANSITION.\r\n\r\n INT. TAXI - DAY\r\n\r\n Hurtling along. Marian cranes her head through the partition\r\n and attempts to strike up a conversation with the surly\r\n cabbie.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I came to New York to visit my youngest\r\n daughter.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n And where is she?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n She would have come to the airport to\r\n meet me - she wanted to - but ... but,\r\n she just started a new job and, well, I\r\n guess no one drives here.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n So, you come here all by yourself?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Uh, yes. My husband passed away recently\r\n ...\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n ... Oh ...\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n ... And the children thought I should\r\n take a trip.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Yeah.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I'm from South Dakota. Where are you\r\n from?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Moscow.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Ohhh. Do you know the East Village?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Oh, yeah ... yeah ... it's a hellhole.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (disconcerted)\r\n You mean it's dangerous?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Nah, not dangerous. Not that dangerous.\r\n (beat)\r\n Not during the day.\r\n\r\n Mischa chuckles as Marian sits back in the cab.\r\n\r\n ANGLE ON MARIAN -\r\n\r\n looking out the window, her face clouded with consternation.\r\n\r\n EXT. BRIDGE - DAY\r\n\r\n Cars pouring into Manhattan over one of the many bridges\r\n spanning the East River.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET AND 2ND AVENUE - DAY\r\n\r\n The cab brakes to a halt, bringing Marian INTO THE FRAME, her\r\n face strickened with fear.\r\n\r\n Marian climbs out of the cab as Mischa, in the background,\r\n opens the trunk to retrieve her bag. Marian, taking in the\r\n foreign surroundings, seems confused about something.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Pardon me, Mischa. Is this 526 East 5TH\r\n Street?\r\n\r\n Mischa closes the trunk and approaches Marian with her one\r\n piece of luggage on a tote.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n No, no. Sorry, I can't drive you to\r\n door. There's a roadblock on Avenue B\r\n ...\r\n (he gestures down the street)\r\n right there ...\r\n\r\n MARIAN'S AND MISCHA'S P.O.V. -\r\n\r\n At the far end of the block, we SEE a movable, blue NYPD\r\n roadblock.\r\n\r\n BACK -\r\n\r\n The two of them, Marian looking puzzled.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n This is one-way street. You go down the\r\n block to the middle.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (pointing uncertainly)\r\n This way?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Yeah. Not far. You will be fine.\r\n (beat)\r\n It's still day.\r\n\r\n He chuckles to himself, but Marian doesn't get the joke.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I see. How much?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Forty-five all total.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Forty-five? I thought it was only\r\n supposed to be thirty?\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Thirty is base price. Tolls, tax, tip\r\n ... it all adds up.\r\n\r\n Marian unsnaps her wallet and grudgingly hands the\r\n disreputable cabbie two twenties and a five.\r\n\r\n Mischa takes the money and starts away. Halfway back to his\r\n cab, he turns around and calls out to Marian, who stands\r\n frozen on the dilapidated street.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n Hey, lady.\r\n (Marian turns)\r\n Hold purse like this.\r\n\r\n Mischa hugs an imaginary purse close to his side. Marian\r\n apes his advice in all seriousness.\r\n\r\n MISCHA\r\n (nodding approval)\r\n Good luck.\r\n\r\n Mischa climbs back into his cab and peels off.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE -\r\n\r\n HIGH DOWN WIDE of Marian standing forlornly at the end of the\r\n street, a Dayton's shopping bag in one hand, her luggage\r\n strapped to the tote in the other.\r\n\r\n TITLE IS SUPERIMPOSED:\r\n\r\n MY MOTHER DREAMS THE SATAN'S DISCIPLES IN NEW YORK\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - DAY - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\n Marian pulling her luggage apprehensively down the street. \r\n\r\n She passes THE SQUATTERS, a motley group of homeless\r\n teenagers, pierced, tattooed, wild hairdos and even wilder\r\n attire.\r\n\r\n SQUATTER #1\r\n Hey, lady, can you help us out with some\r\n change today?\r\n\r\n Marian, shocked by their circumstances, rolls her luggage\r\n past them, smiling faintly.\r\n\r\n SQUATTER #2\r\n Come on. Every little bit helps. A\r\n little food, you know?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Maybe some other time.\r\n\r\n SQUATTER #1\r\n Thanks a lot anyway.\r\n\r\n Marian continues on. She's distracted by ...\r\n\r\n A WOMAN in her thirties, who looks like she hasn't slept in a\r\n week, bent over the railing of a second-story fire escape\r\n balcony, in the throes of a veritable rage.\r\n\r\n WOMAN IN A RAGE\r\n You forgot your fucking plant, you\r\n fucking asshole!\r\n\r\n Marian stares up at her, even more disconcerted than ever.\r\n\r\n The enraged woman continues her tirade at an unseen old\r\n boyfriend below.\r\n\r\n WOMAN IN A RAGE\r\n And there's a lot of other shit in there\r\n you forgot. Just wait there, I'm going\r\n to go fucking get it for you, all right? \r\n No, just wait there! Do you want me to go\r\n get it for you? Well, why don't I just\r\n do that, huh? I'm going to do that right\r\n now!\r\n\r\n Marian looks away and, intrepid Midwesterner that she is,\r\n pushes on.\r\n\r\n A MAN, dressed strangely, stands surreally in the middle of\r\n the street, blowing huge clouds of cigarette smoke.\r\n\r\n A GAY COUPLE parade past, laughing hysterically.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE - AT THE END OF THE STREET -\r\n\r\n A PACK of unmufflered, chrome-coruscating HARLEYS round the\r\n corner in a ear-shattering approach.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n stops dead in her tracks and stares in heartstopping terror.\r\n\r\n ACROSS THE STREET -\r\n\r\n The BIKERS, wearing their club's colors embroidered on blue\r\n jeans, and leather, vests, back their motorcycles in a\r\n uniform row against the curb, kill their engines, park them\r\n at an angle on their kickstands, and dismount.\r\n\r\n They high-five a biker known as the DISCIPLE PROSPECT, a\r\n small, mean-looking man with a red bandana tied taut over his\r\n head, and then disappear into the windowless clubhouse,\r\n passing through a large, forbidding, black door with the\r\n skeleton of Death riding a motorcycle painted on it.\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect tosses the butt of a cigarette into a\r\n rusted steel drum and flames erupt.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n in horror, cannot pry her eyes away from them.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE -\r\n\r\n An upstairs window on a six-story, red-brick co-op building. \r\n PAULA, Marian's daughter, a pretty woman with short dark\r\n hair, is leaning out the window, waving.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Mom! Hi! I'll be right down.\r\n\r\n EXT. THE FRONT SECURITY DOOR - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n Paula emerges to greet her mother. \r\n\r\n Marian glances one last time across the street and exchanges\r\n oblique looks with the Disciple Prospect, now parked on a\r\n stool next to the burning drum. He seems to home in on her.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - TWILIGHT - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n A nice, one-bedroom co-op, tastefully furnished. Paula is\r\n unpacking Marian's things. Marian stands in the middle of\r\n the apartment, feeling relaxed, if still a bit shaken, for\r\n the first time since she arrived.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n So, what do you think?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, once you're inside, it's nice.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n You don't like where I live?\r\n\r\n Marian walks over to the window and peers out.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, when I walked up the block, I ...\r\n well, my word!\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n That's New York. It looks rundown, but\r\n it's safe during the day. You'll get\r\n used to it.\r\n\r\n Marian returns her gaze to the view out the window.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET - TWILIGHT - MARIAN'S P.O.V. -\r\n\r\n Out the window. Two BIKERS stand with their arms\r\n crisscrossed against their leather-vested chests, framing the\r\n burning drum on the sidewalk, guarding the phalanx of\r\n Harleys.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT - LATER\r\n\r\n Paula and Marian are sitting at the dining table. They're\r\n studying one of those plastic laminated maps of New York that\r\n you can buy everywhere. Paula is attempting to acquaint her\r\n mother with Manhattan's complex public transportation system.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n You take the M-15 bus all the way to ...\r\n 79TH Street. And then you take the\r\n crosstown bus to 5TH Avenue, and the\r\n Metropolitan Museum of Art is right\r\n there. You can't miss it.\r\n\r\n Marian removes her glasses and fixes her gaze on her\r\n daughter.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I wanted to ask you something. Those\r\n motorcycles across the street ...?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Uh-huh?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n ... What are they all doing there?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n That's the Satan's Disciples' New York\r\n headquarters.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (alarmed)\r\n The motorcycle gang? Don't they deal\r\n drugs and rape young girls?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I've never had any problem with them. \r\n People say it's the safest block in the\r\n East Village.\r\n (lays a reassuring hand on her\r\n mother's arm)\r\n I just hope their motorcycles don't keep\r\n you up at night.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n CRANE UP to Marian lying wide awake on a convertible sofa\r\n next to the street window. We (Marian!) hear VOICES,\r\n MOTORCYCLES REVVING, POLICE SIRENS, followed by what sounds\r\n like GUNFIRE, tires SCREECHING, a cacophony of sounds typical\r\n of summer nights in the East Village.\r\n\r\n We go UP and OVER Marian toward the window as imaginary\r\n voices flood in and become intelligible.\r\n\r\n RANDOM VOICES (O.S.)\r\n Did that shipment of heroin come in?\r\n That old lady see them? \r\n We can kill her if we have to.\r\n\r\n RAUCOUS LAUGHTER erupts.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET - NIGHT - MONTAGE\r\n\r\n A Kenneth Anger Scorpio Rising-like MONTAGE:\r\n A black-booted foot kick-starts a Harley. \r\n A gleaming chrome exhaust pipe vibrates and spits smoke. \r\n A black-gloved hand revs a handle-bar accelerator. \r\n A helmet is pulled down over a Hun-like face. \r\n Flames roar in the steel drum as though a signpost in Hell.\r\n\r\n One of the DISCIPLES, bare-chested, long-haired, sweating,\r\n swings a baseball bat and calls out to Marian in a singsong\r\n voice:\r\n\r\n BIKER\r\n Oh, Marian ...\r\n\r\n Another half-naked BIKER, arms tattooed up and down, has\r\n Marian's suitcase open and is scattering her belongings out\r\n into the street. He finds the framed photo of her deceased\r\n husband and tosses it to the pavement. He raises his head\r\n slowly with a sneer and looks up at ...\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n standing in the window in her nightgown, a hand covering her\r\n mouth, looking down in utter terror on the fire-lit tableaux\r\n of her nightmare.\r\n\r\n THE BIKER ON THE STREET -\r\n\r\n starts stomping on the photo with the heel of his boot,\r\n shattering the glass. Then he removes the photo from the\r\n frame and slowly drops it into the roaring conflagration in\r\n the oil drum.\r\n\r\n The other dawdling Disciples guffaw loudly.\r\n\r\n SLAM CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian wakes with a start, consciousness giving way to a sigh\r\n of relief.\r\n\r\n FADE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. CO-OP BUILDING - DAY\r\n\r\n ESTABLISHING SHOT of Paula's red-brick co-op, splashed with\r\n sunlight and framed by a bright blue sky.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY\r\n\r\n It's quiet in the co-op. Marian is dusting the bookshelves\r\n and humming to herself. \r\n\r\n Behind a shelf of books she discovers a PHOTO ENVELOPE with\r\n some snapshots in them. Curious, she has a look-see.\r\n\r\n SNAPSHOTS -\r\n\r\n flipping through Marian's hands. They chronicle Paula and a\r\n BOYFRIEND on a recent vacation to a Caribbean island. Marian\r\n is amused by them ... until she comes to one showing Paula\r\n with her bathing suit top off, arms raised giddily in the\r\n air.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n gasps, then blushes and quickly replaces the pictures.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY - LATER\r\n\r\n Marian is at the window, peering through the furling\r\n curtains.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET - DAY - MARIAN'S P.O.V. -\r\n\r\n Looking down on the Satan's Disciples' clubhouse. Two BIKERS\r\n and their GIRLFRIENDS swagger out of the clubhouse, don their\r\n helmets, mount their bikes, kick-start them to life and roar\r\n off down the street.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n draws away from the window. She picks up her \"Streetwise\r\n Manhattan\" laminated map, puts her glasses on, looks at it,\r\n debating whether to tackle the streets of New York or not.\r\n\r\n A FEW MINUTES LATER -\r\n\r\n Marian, determined now to get out of the co-op, pulls her\r\n purse over her shoulder and grips it like the cabbie\r\n instructed. Then she moves to the front door, opens it, and\r\n steps warily out into the hallway. She freezes when she\r\n HEARS THUNDERING FOOTSTEPS.\r\n\r\n INT. HALLWAY - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian cowers against the half-open door as a young MAN,\r\n wearing faded jeans, black cowboy boots, and leather vest\r\n over a naked torso, comes charging down the stairs pulled by\r\n a frothing, pent-up BULLDOG on a leash.\r\n\r\n As he passes, Marian retreats quickly back into her unit,\r\n closes the door, and locks the locks from inside.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Paula is hanging up her coat and setting down her briefcase,\r\n an incredulous expression on her face, looking at ...\r\n\r\n Marian, sitting in a chair by the window, leafing through a\r\n magazine.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (mildly rebuking)\r\n You didn't leave the house all day?\r\n\r\n Marian shrugs.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. NEW YORK - DUSK\r\n\r\n Manhattan skyscrapers framed against a twilit sky.\r\n\r\n INT. RESTAURANT/BAR - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian and Paula are sitting at the bar. They each have a\r\n glass of white wine in front of them. Paula is looking at\r\n some PHOTOS of the farm that Marian has brought along.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Would you look at those strawberries. \r\n They made the best jam. \r\n (passes Paula the photos)\r\n Here are some more pictures of the farm. \r\n Crops were unbelievable this year.\r\n\r\n Paula continues to browse through the snaps.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Plenty of rain. Your dad would have been\r\n happy with that.\r\n\r\n Marian removes a pill from a small vial she's rummaged out of\r\n her purse and slips it discreetly into her mouth.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I just can't seem to focus on anything\r\n these days.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (turning to her mother)\r\n That's why it's good you came to visit\r\n me.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (washing her pill down with\r\n some wine)\r\n How are you doing sweetheart?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I'm good.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Dating anyone?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n No, I'm working too much, I don't have\r\n time.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n What about the fellow in those pictures?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n What pictures?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n You know ...\r\n (raises both hands in the air)\r\n ... whoops!\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (blushing)\r\n Mother!\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, they were right out in plain view.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Behind the books.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n But I was dusting.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (reluctantly explaining)\r\n I was seeing Aaron and there were some\r\n ... complications.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n He seemed quite taken with you.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I don't want to talk about it.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (hurt)\r\n You know, you never tell me anything.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n That's not true.\r\n (lays a placating hand on her\r\n mother's arm)\r\n Besides, I don't want you dusting. I\r\n want you to see New York.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian and Paula, arm-in-arm, walk down the block back to her\r\n building.\r\n\r\n A MOTORCYCLE rounds the corner, slows to a crawl, and one of\r\n the Satan's Disciples stares over at the two of them as if\r\n casing them out. Paula won't look at him, but Marian can't\r\n avert her gaze.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian lying awake in bed, the ENGINES of the Disciples'\r\n Harleys deafening ...\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. SATAN'S DISCIPLES' CLUBHOUSE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n DOLLY ACROSS a line of idling Harleys, the bikers, one at a\r\n time in succession, switching their single-beam headlights\r\n on. \r\n\r\n PAN ACROSS the FACES of the Disciples, mounted on their\r\n cycles, dark helmets, faded blue jeans jackets embroidered\r\n with elaborate stitching of their club's insignia, cigarettes\r\n dangling from their hirsute mouths, baleful-looking\r\n countenances, revving their engines loudly, tauntingly.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE -\r\n\r\n From across the street, Marian, appearing like an apparition\r\n in her nightgown, surreally walks toward them, a beseeching\r\n look on her face.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Excuse me. Could you please turn your\r\n motorcycles off? They're so loud, I\r\n can't sleep.\r\n\r\n GO TO SLOW MOTION as the BIKERS, some ten in number, slowly\r\n approach the frail-looking Marian. Gently, they pick her up\r\n off the ground and raise her aloft. Then, like some moving\r\n human bier, they carry her through the forbidding black door\r\n into their clubhouse.\r\n\r\n INT. CLUBHOUSE - NIGHT\r\n\r\n We follow Marian down a dark corridor leading into the bowels\r\n of the clubhouse.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. DREAM CORRIDOR - NIGHT\r\n\r\n At the end of another corridor, a MAN stands, silhouetted\r\n against an explosion of blue light. As we near the ghostly\r\n figure, we REALIZE it's Marian's deceased husband.\r\n\r\n There's a GUN SHOT.\r\n\r\n SLAM CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian wakes with a start, clutching a hand to her breast.\r\n\r\n INT. KITCHEN - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n Marian shakes a Valium out of a vial, puts it into her mouth, \r\n swallows it with a drink of orange juice.\r\n\r\n FADE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. PAULA'S CO-OP - THE NEXT DAY\r\n\r\n Marian, not wanting to be a disappointment to her daughter,\r\n damn her fears, gathers her purse up and starts out the door.\r\n\r\n INT. HALLWAY - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian is again prevented from an easy exit when a young, hip\r\n looking COUPLE come bounding down the stairs. As she stands\r\n at her open door to let them pass, they completely ignore her\r\n as if she didn't exist.\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - DAY - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n Seen from Marian's perspective across the street, the front\r\n of the Satan's Disciples headquarters is quiet. There are\r\n only a couple Harleys parked out front.\r\n\r\n Marian, relieved that there are no bikers out, hurries off in\r\n the direction of First Avenue, determined to see the sights\r\n of the city.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. NEW YORK CITY - DAY - MONTAGE\r\n\r\n A giddy, almost dreamlike, MONTAGE of Marian touring New\r\n York. She's SUPERIMPOSED over famous landmarks, as if she\r\n were standing stationery and the city were in a diorama\r\n rotating all around her. The Empire State Building; Circle\r\n Cruise Line; eating a hot dog from a street vendor; shopping\r\n at Macy's. Marian beams as she is magically whisked along,\r\n walking on air.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian comes INTO THE FRAME around the corner. She has a\r\n spring in her step and a broad smile emblazoning her face. \r\n But her sanguine mood is quickly shattered when she HEARS\r\n shouting. She freezes in her tracks.\r\n\r\n ACROSS THE STREET - THE SATAN'S DISCIPLES HEADQUARTERS -\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect and another Biker are roughing up a\r\n teenage KID, wrestling him into submission.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n You're just chilling, huh? Not on this\r\n block, do you understand?\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n at the security door of Paula's building. She rummages\r\n anxiously through her purse, but she can't find her keys!\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, no.\r\n\r\n Marian glances across the street, her face tensed with fear.\r\n\r\n ACROSS THE STREET -\r\n\r\n The Bikers continue to roughhouse the Kid. The Disciple\r\n Prospect brandishes a plastic bag under his nose.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n What's this, huh?\r\n\r\n KID\r\n I ain't got shit on me.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n What is that? You're chilling, man? \r\n Well, then maybe we need to warm things\r\n up for you, man. How many times do we\r\n got to tell you? You don't listen and\r\n you don't learn and that's the problem. \r\n That is the problem.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n turns away from the escalating violence across the street and\r\n punches one of the buttons on the intercom. A WOMAN'S VOICE\r\n crackles over it.\r\n\r\n WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)\r\n Hello?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n My daughter lives here and I'm her mother\r\n and I've lost my keys.\r\n\r\n There's no answer.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Hello? Hello?\r\n\r\n Marian returns her frightened gaze to the altercation across\r\n the street.\r\n\r\n ACROSS THE STREET - MARIAN'S P.O.V.\r\n\r\n Two more DISCIPLES emerge from the clubhouse. One of them\r\n squirts lighter fluid on the fire burning in the steel drum\r\n and the flames explode. Then KID is dragged over toward the\r\n fire. The Disciple Prospect drags him dangerously close to\r\n the flames.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE\r\n Roast him!\r\n\r\n KID\r\n (screaming)\r\n All right all right all right.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n petrified, as if she'd stepped into a re-enactment of a\r\n passage out of Revelations, walks briskly down to the middle\r\n of the block toward a pay phone. \r\n\r\n DISCIPLES CLUBHOUSE -\r\n\r\n The Disciples kick the drug-dealing Teenager a couple more\r\n times, then set him free, laughing as he flees down the block\r\n in mortal fear.\r\n\r\n PAY PHONE -\r\n\r\n Marian drops the appropriate coins in the coin slot and dials\r\n a number from memory.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (quavery voice)\r\n Yes, is Paula there? ... Could you leave\r\n her a message, please? Tell her it's\r\n urgent.\r\n (gathers herself)\r\n Her mother has lost her keys and is\r\n stranded on the street with the Satan's\r\n Disciples ... When she comes back, would\r\n you tell her to come home as quickly as\r\n she can? ... Thank you.\r\n\r\n Marian hangs up the phone and turns, quails in terror.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE -\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect is towering over her, staring down at\r\n her with a scowl on his face.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, please, don't hurt me.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n I just need to use the phone, lady.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, let me get out of your way then.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n What happened? Did you lose your keys?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (withdrawing anxiously)\r\n Have a nice day.\r\n\r\n WIDE SHOT -\r\n\r\n Marian walks quickly ACROSS THE FRAME. As she EXITS RIGHT,\r\n the Disciple Prospect ENTERS LEFT and trails after her.\r\n\r\n EXT. PAULA'S BUILDING - DAY - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n Marian is at the front entrance, uncertain what to do. She\r\n quailss when the Disciple Prospect approaches. Without a\r\n word, he reaches his arm over her and presses a buzzer to one\r\n of the units.\r\n\r\n WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)\r\n Hello.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Washing machine repairman.\r\n\r\n The DOOR BUZZES almost at once, and the Disciple Prospect\r\n pushes it in and holds it open until Marian is safely inside. \r\n He looks at her a little annoyed. Marian is absolutely\r\n nonplussed.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP HALLWAY - LATER THAT DAY\r\n\r\n Paula comes running up the stairs. She stops when she SEES:\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n sitting on the floor, propped against the door to their unit.\r\n\r\n Paula shakes her head reprovingly at her mother who just\r\n shrugs, chagrined.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - BATHROOM - NIGHT - LATER\r\n\r\n Paula is in the bathroom. She has her mother's vial of\r\n Valium in her hand.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Maybe you should lay low tomorrow. I'm\r\n going to see if I can get off early and\r\n maybe we can take the ferry cruise. \r\n Okay?\r\n\r\n LIVING ROOM -\r\n\r\n Marian is standing at the window looking down on the street.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET - NIGHT - MARIAN'S P.O.V.\r\n\r\n The Disciples are backing their bikes against the curb,\r\n parking them, and filing into the clubhouse.\r\n\r\n BATHROOM -\r\n\r\n Paula dispenses the remaining pills into the palm of her\r\n hand.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (to herself)\r\n Three left.\r\n\r\n LIVING ROOM -\r\n\r\n Marian looking apprehensively down at the Disciples'\r\n headquarters, stupefied.\r\n\r\n Paula emerges from the bathroom in the background. Marian\r\n doesn't turn to acknowledge her. She continues to stare\r\n transfixed at the bikes and the fire-burning oil drum.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (softer)\r\n Okay? Does that sound like a plan?\r\n\r\n Marian doesn't answer. \r\n\r\n Paula stands some distance from her distracted mother, a\r\n worried expression featured on her face.\r\n\r\n FADE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY\r\n\r\n Looking through the security eyepiece, a FISH-EYE LENS SHOT\r\n of an attractive, but distraught woman in her twenties,\r\n puffing a cigarette, eyes red and swollen from crying.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Who is it?\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n It's Marika. Is Paula there?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n She's at work. I'm her mother.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n Oh. I thought today was Saturday.\r\n\r\n Marian, seemingly reassured, opens the door for her. She\r\n sees Marika, realizes she's upset about something, and feels\r\n immediately compassionate toward her.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n I'm sorry. I had a wretched night.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh. You need a cappuccino.\r\n\r\n And she lets Marika in.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\n They're sitting at the dining table, having coffee. Marian\r\n is listening sympathetically to Marika's tale of woe.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n And there was this number on my phone\r\n bill that I didn't recognize. Calls made\r\n at three and four in the morning. So, I\r\n called the number ... and a woman\r\n answered. And I ... I hung up.\r\n (leans forward)\r\n So, then I followed him. Just like in\r\n the movies. And I found out that he has\r\n a wife and a little girl living in\r\n Brooklyn. We had been going together for\r\n almost a year.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (shaking her head in disgust)\r\n Men ... they're all the same. \r\n (beat)\r\n Our pastor in Sioux Falls was caught with\r\n his wife's sister.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n (brightening)\r\n Really?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, it was such a big scandal.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n What happened?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Poor man had to leave town.\r\n (Marika laughs)\r\n And I hear that other women came forward.\r\n\r\n This makes Marika laugh even harder. Marian's story seems to\r\n have assuaged her own grief in some parallel way.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n You know, you ought to come out to South\r\n Dakota some time and meet my son, Steve. \r\n He's single.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n What does he do?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n He's an organic farmer.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n (chuckling)\r\n Oh. Well, that would be a ... change.\r\n (smiles warmly)\r\n Thank you, Mrs. Peterson. You have a\r\n very reassuring voice.\r\n\r\n The Disciple's MOTORCYCLES GROWL OFF SCREEN, interrupting\r\n their tęte-ŕ-tęte. \r\n\r\n Marian and Marika both rise simultaneously from the table and\r\n amble over to the window together.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n I wish they wouldn't come and go in\r\n packs, then they wouldn't be so loud.\r\n\r\n They reach the window.\r\n\r\n EXT. STREET - DAY - MARIAN'S AND MARIKA'S P.O.V.\r\n\r\n The Disciples dismounting from their bikes below, shutting\r\n down their engines and removing their helmets.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY\r\n\r\n At the window, Marian and Marika standing side by side.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I wonder what they do in there? Don't\r\n they frighten you? They all look so ...\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n ... Manly?\r\n\r\n Marian does a double-take and throws a backward glance at\r\n Marika.\r\n\r\n MARIKA\r\n You know, probably none of them had a\r\n mother like you.\r\n\r\n Marian and Marika smile at each other.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian's FOOT STEPS OFF THE CURB.\r\n\r\n WIDER ANGLE -\r\n\r\n Marian crosses the street headed in the direction of the\r\n Satan's Disciples headquarters.\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect is sitting alone, guarding the line of\r\n parked Harleys. He's wearing dark aviator shades and his\r\n trademark red bandana tied over his head. Marian steps\r\n bravely right up to him.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Excuse me, sir.\r\n (the Disciple Prospect looks\r\n up, poker-faced)\r\n I just wanted to thank you for helping me\r\n get into my building yesterday.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Yeah, sure, no problem, you're welcome.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n My daughter lives across the street from\r\n you people and she tells me that you keep\r\n this area safe. Is that true?\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n We like to think so, yeah.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n And you don't deal drugs?\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect removes his sunglasses and looks at her\r\n mock reprovingly.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Who told you we deal drugs?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I'm just concerned about my daughter.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n You don't have to worry. She's going to\r\n be fine. We're law-abiding citizens just\r\n like you.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n What about yesterday? Kicking that poor\r\n boy?\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n (mildly annoyed)\r\n That poor boy's a crack dealer from\r\n Alphabet City. We do not allow his kind\r\n on this block.\r\n\r\n Marian seems to accept the explanation. She glances up.\r\n\r\n THE CLUBHOUSE DOOR -\r\n\r\n The black, forbidding door leading into the clubhouse with\r\n its painting of Death on a stylized Harley, gripping\r\n lightning bolts for handlebars.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT -\r\n\r\n looking at Marian looking up at the door.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Is there something else I can do for you?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, I'd love to see inside your club.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n (taken aback)\r\n You want to come inside?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, if you're not holding a meeting or\r\n anything.\r\n\r\n EXT. CLUBHOUSE ENTRANCE - DAY - A FEW MOMENTS LATER\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect emerges from the club with the HEAD\r\n DISCIPLE, a gentle giant of a man with a long, flowing wispy\r\n beard and an old man's paunch. They're muttering about\r\n something.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Her daughter lives across the street and\r\n she was wondering ...\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n What?\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n She's curious ...\r\n\r\n The Head Disciple glances over at Marian standing curbside,\r\n expectantly awaiting approval. He sees that she's ingenuous.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n What the hell ...\r\n (calling out to Marian)\r\n Come on in.\r\n\r\n Marian, smiling, comes forward.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n (pointing to the steps leading\r\n up to the door)\r\n You watch your step here.\r\n\r\n And the three disappear inside.\r\n\r\n INT. SATAN'S DISCIPLES' CLUBHOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\n The hallway leading into the clubhouse is dark and gloomy. \r\n ROCK MUSIC assails them as they make their passage into the\r\n main room.\r\n\r\n CLUBHOUSE MAIN ROOM -\r\n\r\n They reach the main room where about ten or so DISCIPLES are\r\n lounging about. One has his nose in a book, The Road Less\r\n Traveled. Another reads the Wall Street Journal. Two others\r\n are seated at a card table, playing a game of poker. Still\r\n another is sprawled on a couch, smoking a cigarette. The\r\n walls are festooned with biker posters. The place is a bit\r\n of a mess, but innocuous.\r\n\r\n The Head Disciple stands in the center of the room and\r\n addresses his clan.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n Hey, guys. This here is, uh ...\r\n\r\n He turns to Marian, realizing he doesn't know her name.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (meekly)\r\n Marian.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n (booming voice)\r\n Marian!\r\n\r\n A CHORUS OF VOICES\r\n Hi, Marian.\r\n Hey, Marian.\r\n Yo, Marian.\r\n\r\n Marian blushes at their warm response to her unexpected\r\n appearance.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n (explaining her visit)\r\n Marian's daughter lives across the street\r\n and she was a little worried about her.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #1\r\n Swear to God, lady, she's not here.\r\n\r\n Laughter erupts. Marian smiles.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #2\r\n Hey, is she cute?\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #3\r\n Does she like motorcycles?\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #4\r\n Can she cook?\r\n\r\n Amiable laughter fills the room. Marian laughs with them. \r\n She glances all around her, fascinated by this dungeon she\r\n had dreamed and fantasized about since she first arrived in\r\n New York.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n You know, this isn't so bad. It looks\r\n like our kids' rooms when they were\r\n growing up.\r\n\r\n INSERT SHOTS -\r\n\r\n of overflowing ashtrays, crushed beer cans, fast food\r\n wrappers balled up and strewn on tables.\r\n\r\n BACK -\r\n\r\n to Marian, her brow knitted thoughtfully in a schoolmarmish\r\n expression.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Could use some cleaning.\r\n\r\n INSERT SHOTS -\r\n\r\n of several of the Disciples' FACES, turning to her in SLOW\r\n MOTION with mock baleful looks of disapprobation.\r\n\r\n THERE'S A BEAT, then ...\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CLUBHOUSE - DAY - MONTAGE\r\n\r\n A MONTAGE, with abbreviated SCENES DISSOLVING one into\r\n another of Marian supervising a thorough, top-to-bottom\r\n cleaning of the clubhouse:\r\n\r\n One Disciple sprays Easy-Off in a blackened oven.\r\n Another empties ashtrays.\r\n Yet Another vacuums.\r\n Still others pick up wrappers from under the couch, while\r\n Marian wags a reproving finger at them.\r\n One Disciple tosses the contents of an ashtray under the\r\n couch while Marian isn't looking.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CLUBHOUSE - DAY - MONTAGE CONTINUING - LATER\r\n\r\n Marian in the kitchen, wearing the cut-off blue jeans\r\n insignia jacket of the Satan's Disciples, their colors\r\n emblazoned on the back. She pops the top on a can of beer\r\n and pours some of it into a huge pot of chili she's stirring\r\n over a stove, while the Disciples sit patiently in the\r\n background at a bar awaiting the food. \r\n\r\n Marian tries a sip of the beer and some of the Disciples\r\n smile approvingly.\r\n\r\n A FEW MOMENTS LATER -\r\n\r\n Marian ladles chili into all of their bowls in a series of\r\n JUMP CUTS.\r\n\r\n DISSOLVE TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CLUBHOUSE - DAY - STILL LATER\r\n\r\n All the Disciples are huddled around Marian in the middle of\r\n the clubhouse, as if she were the mother hen, arms folded\r\n across their chests, smiles creasing their faces, sated.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Well, I'd better be going. It was nice\r\n meeting all of you.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #1\r\n Thanks, Marian.\r\n\r\n CHORUS OF OTHER DISCIPLES\r\n Thanks, Marian.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE #2\r\n The food was outstanding.\r\n\r\n Marian starts off.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n You know, if we can do anything for you,\r\n Marian, you just let us know.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (turns, considers for a moment)\r\n Well, there is one thing.\r\n (beat, mildly scolding)\r\n At night, your motorcycles are so darn\r\n loud, I'm not getting much sleep. Now,\r\n I'm going home in a few days, so ...\r\n could I ask you to keep them quiet?\r\n\r\n Some of the Disciples exchange petulant looks, rolling their\r\n eyes at the request.\r\n\r\n HEAD DISCIPLE\r\n (mollifying)\r\n Well, we'll, uh, see what we can do,\r\n Marian.\r\n\r\n All the Disciples break into laughter.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Thank you.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. BUILDING - DAY\r\n\r\n A narrow, stand-alone ten-story isosceles-shaped office\r\n building, on an island of land in downtown Manhattan. \r\n ESTABLISHING SHOT.\r\n\r\n INT. OFFICE - DAY\r\n\r\n Paula, with her mother in tow, knocks on an open office door.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Hello.\r\n\r\n NEW ANGLE -\r\n\r\n DON PALMER, an avuncular-looking man in his mid-forties rises\r\n from his desk.\r\n\r\n MR. PALMER\r\n Come in.\r\n\r\n Paula and Marian enter the office and halt mid-room across\r\n from his desk.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Don, this is my mother.\r\n (turns to Marian)\r\n Mom, this is my boss, Don Palmer.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (enthusiastically)\r\n Oh, it's so nice to meet you.\r\n\r\n MR. PALMER\r\n We're very glad to have your daughter\r\n working for us.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (blurting out)\r\n I met the Satan's Disciples today.\r\n\r\n MR. PALMER\r\n (chuckling nervously)\r\n Really?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Mother, I ...\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (waving her daughter off)\r\n My daughter lives right across the street\r\n from the Satan's Disciples' clubhouse,\r\n and I was so worried about her ...\r\n so, I went over and introduced myself. \r\n And they were the nicest people.\r\n\r\n Paula and Mr. Palmer exchange disquieting glances.\r\n\r\n MR. PALMER\r\n (playing along)\r\n Well, that's a very unusual New York\r\n experience.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I had a wonderful time.\r\n\r\n Paula is in a mild state of shock hearing her mother's\r\n fantastical anecdote.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Paula is sitting at the dining table with a plate piled with\r\n roast chicken, potatoes, and broccoli in front of her. She\r\n has a worried look etched on her face.\r\n\r\n Marian is in the kitchen in the background, feeling light and\r\n happy, a singsong quality to her voice. She brings a plate\r\n of food for herself to the table.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n And they were so friendly those young\r\n men. Though I do think they should shave\r\n their beards and ... and get some nicer\r\n clothes.\r\n\r\n Marian sits down at the table and takes a sip of her wine,\r\n picks up her utensils and gets ready to dig in. She turns to\r\n Paula who isn't touching her food, her head in her hands. \r\n Marian, seemingly oblivious of her daughter's feelings,\r\n prattles on.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n What do you say ... we take a subway\r\n uptown and see a play tonight?\r\n\r\n Marian finally notices that Paula isn't listening.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n What's wrong?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Mom ... I mean, it's amusing to imagine\r\n such a thing, but ... how many of those\r\n pills have you been taking?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (stung, taken aback)\r\n Oh, that has nothing to do with it.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n No, no, it's my fault. I've been pushing\r\n you too hard to do things on your own.\r\n\r\n Marian retreats into herself, sips her wine - as if she,\r\n herself, now wonders if she's lost her mind - and her buoyant\r\n mood deflates almost at once.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n The, um, other night, I got up to get a\r\n glass of water and you were standing by\r\n the window talking to daddy. I called\r\n out to you, but you didn't answer. You\r\n remember?\r\n\r\n Marian doesn't remember, and her daughter's words pierce her. \r\n She's afraid to object.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n New York is a ... it's a strange place in\r\n the summertime. The noise, the warm air,\r\n it's ... easy to imagine things.\r\n\r\n Paula lays a reassuring hand on Marian's arm, talks to her\r\n condescendingly, as if she were a child.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Now, you know you didn't go into the\r\n clubhouse, did you?\r\n\r\n Marian doesn't bother to argue, fearing anything she might\r\n say would compromise her.\r\n\r\n PAULA (CONT'D)\r\n It's okay. Dad's dying put a lot of\r\n stress on you. But you're going to be\r\n all right. We're all going to be all\r\n right. Where did you get this vivid\r\n imagination, huh?\r\n\r\n Paula grips Marian's arm a little tighter and shakes it\r\n gently as if snapping her back to reality. Marian returns\r\n her a tight-lipped smile.\r\n\r\n FADE OUT.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n Marian, lying supine on the convertible sofa bed by the open\r\n window, snoring peacefully.\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - NIGHT\r\n\r\n On the sidewalk, the Disciple Prospect sits next to the fire\r\n breathing oil drum, standing sentry over the Harleys.\r\n\r\n One of the Disciples comes out of the clubhouse and they high\r\n five. The Disciple mounts his Harley and is about to kick\r\n start it to life, when the Disciple Prospect rises from his\r\n stool.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n Yo, man!\r\n\r\n The Disciple about to start his bike, turns. \r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect raises two fingers to his lips in a\r\n kind of warning, then gestures up to Paula's co-op where\r\n Marian is sleeping.\r\n\r\n The Disciple, remembering the new rule, nods assent with a\r\n slightly annoyed expression.\r\n\r\n Then, he puts his Harley into neutral, dismounts, and starts\r\n slowly walking it down the quiet, ill-lit street.\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - NIGHT\r\n\r\n The room is cast in soft ambient light from the street. \r\n Paula comes into the living room and lies down next to her\r\n mother on the sofa bed and rouses her awake. Marian swims\r\n leadenly back to consciousness. \r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Mom, I need to talk to you.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (still drowsy)\r\n If it's about the bikers, dear, I don't\r\n want to talk about it.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n No, I had a dream about daddy. Do you\r\n think I'll ever meet anyone like him?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, I hope so, dear.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n You know that guy in the pictures you\r\n saw?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Aaron?\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Yeah ... turned out to be a real jerk.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I'm sorry.\r\n\r\n Marian pats her daughter on the arm. Paula pricks up her\r\n ears for a minute.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n It's unusually quiet tonight, isn't it?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Mm hmm.\r\n\r\n FADE TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. CENTRAL PARK - DAY\r\n\r\n A lovely, sun-drenched day. Shadows dapple a promenade along\r\n one of the park's many ponds. Paula and Marian walk arm-in\r\n arm.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I think you should consider coming out\r\n and staying with me longer.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Oh, I don't want to be in the way. \r\n You've got your career and everything.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n You wouldn't be in the way. I like\r\n having you around.\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Dear, I was thinking. Why don't we go to\r\n Paris next year? I've never been. Your\r\n father, God bless him, wasn't much for\r\n traveling.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I'd love to.\r\n\r\n They walk off into the golden light.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n INT. CO-OP - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian is finishing up her packing. Paula comes from the\r\n kitchen, bearing a gift for her mother to take home with her.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Here you go.\r\n (Marian accepts the gift)\r\n I think you should talk to Dr. Byrne when\r\n you get back about how much Valium he's\r\n prescribing. Okay?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n At my age, I'm going to take any pill\r\n that makes me feel better.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n Mother!\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n I can make my own decisions.\r\n\r\n Paula extends her arms and embraces her mother.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n I love you, Mom.\r\n (turns to leave)\r\n I have to run. You remembered to call\r\n the limousine service, right?\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n Mm hmm.\r\n\r\n PAULA\r\n (pulling on her backpack)\r\n Well, bye. And have a safe trip ... and\r\n ... Paris in the spring!\r\n\r\n MARIAN\r\n (pensive)\r\n Goodbye, sweetheart.\r\n\r\n Paula blows her mother a kiss and Marian throws her daughter\r\n a little wave.\r\n\r\n CUT TO:\r\n\r\n EXT. EAST 5TH STREET - DAY\r\n\r\n Marian steps down the stairs of her daughter's building. A\r\n smile breaks out on her face when she SEES:\r\n\r\n A MOTORCADE -\r\n\r\n of idling Harleys in the middle of the street, waiting for\r\n her.\r\n\r\n MARIAN -\r\n\r\n turns to the Head Disciple, materializing behind her,\r\n carrying her luggage. He gestures with his head toward the\r\n motorcycles.\r\n\r\n THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET -\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect takes Marian's luggage from the Head\r\n Disciple and hauls it over to one of the waiting Harleys and\r\n straps it on to the carrying rack.\r\n\r\n Then, he helps Marian onto the back of the Harley she's going\r\n to be riding to the airport. Gently, he places a helmet -\r\n festooned with decals of fire-breathing reptiles - over her\r\n head and affixes the chin-strap.\r\n\r\n DISCIPLE PROSPECT\r\n All right?\r\n\r\n Marian nods and beams at the same time.\r\n\r\n The other Harleys form a circle around Marian's motorcycle.\r\n\r\n The Disciple Prospect gives them a signal and they start off,\r\n one by one, forming a V-shaped procession.\r\n\r\n Marian, completely comfortable on her motorcycle, her arms\r\n around her Disciple escort, her fever dream now manifest.\r\n\r\n CRANE UP as the procession heads down East 5TH.\r\n\r\n WHITE OUT -\r\n\r\n CREDITS\r\n\r\n"
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https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/mother_dreams.html
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"from": "human",
"value": "GIVE A SCREENPLAY FOR: 'Mystery Men' ?"
},
{
"from": "gpt",
"value": "\r\n\r\nTHE MYSTERY MEN\r\n\r\nBy Neil Cuthbert\r\n\r\nBased on the Dark Horse comic created by Bob Burden\r\n\r\nRevised June 6, 1997\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nTHEME AND CREDITS...\r\n\r\nFADE IN:\r\n\r\nEXT. ERIE HOSPITAL FOR THE CRIMINALLY INSANE - DAY\r\n\r\nCAMERA MOVES THROUGH a tangled jungle of razor wire, finally COMING \r\nINTO VIEW of a foreboding, fortress-like old institution, surrounded by \r\ntowers and gun turrets. Screaming and horrible laughter is heard from \r\nwithin...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON a sign that reads \"Erie Hospital for the Criminally Insane\" \r\n... This is where the worst killers and psychos go.\r\n\r\nINT. CONFERENCE ROOM - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nTHE CAMERA PANS THE EXPRESSIONLESS FACES of the REVIEW BOARD as \r\nCASANOVA FRANKENSTEIN sits across from them. Dressed in an \r\nimmaculately tailored prison smock (with \"Casanova\" exquisitely \r\nembroidered above the pocket), he sits contritely as DOCTOR EMMET \r\nBIERCE, the hospital's fatherly Chief of Psychiatry, presents his case.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIERCE\r\n\t\tNo one can deny the horrendous nature of Mr. \r\n\t\tFrankenstein's crimes, but in the twenty years \r\n\t\the has been with us, I have never seen a \r\n\t\tpatient turn his energies to more productive \r\n\t\tuse.\r\n\r\nCASANOVA, the picture of remorse and repentance.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIERCE\r\n\t\tJust look at his accomplishments... three \r\n\t\tvolumes of poetry, two rock operas, a sculpture \r\n\t\tgarden, four romance novels... and who can \r\n\t\tforget his touching portrayal of Billy Bigelow \r\n\t\tin our all-psychotic production of \r\n\t\t\"Carousel\"...\r\n\r\nON SEVERAL OF THE BOARD getting misty eyed at the memory of that \r\nbrilliant performance...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIERCE\r\n\t\tDirected by our own Doctor Anabel Leek.\r\n\r\nON DOCTOR ANABEL LEEK, the hospital's icily beautiful, ultra cool, top \r\nshrink.\r\n\r\nA moment later Casanova addresses them... His manner is charming, \r\nsincere, his voice soft, filled with emotion. He is a master of \r\nseduction.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTwenty years ago I was a lost soul. \r\n\t\tLoveless...\r\n\t\t(with a son-like glance at Doctor Bierce)\r\n\t\tFatherless...\r\n\t\t(chokes on the word)\r\n\t\tA... psycho!\r\n\t\t(breaks down sobbing)\r\n\t\tOh! How could I have done it? The murder... \r\n\t\tthe mayhem... all of those lovely young girls!\r\n\t\t(weeping, a brilliant performance)\r\n\t\tI'm sorry! I'm SO SO SORRY!\r\n\r\nDoctor Bierce wipes the tears from his eyes. Reactions from the board, \r\nmoved, as Casanova weeps convulsively. Doctor Leek shows no reaction.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(pulls himself together)\r\n\t\tBut my deeds have been done, and my youth is \r\n\t\tgone, and we can only go forward in this cruel \r\n\t\tworld... and if I have learned anything from my \r\n\t\twretched life it is that... When you walk \r\n\t\tthrough a storm, keep your head held high...\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(singing)\r\n\t\tAnd don't be afraid of the dark...\r\n\r\nTears plop dawn the cheeks of the review board as the FULLY \r\nORCHESTRATED STRAINS OF \"WHEN YOU WALK THROUGH A STORM\" SWELL...\r\n\r\nSERIES OF SHOTS - AS THE MUSIC CONTINUES\r\n\r\nA hand stamps Casanova's file \"CURED\"... Casanova shakes hands and \r\nembraces the tearful members of the review board, finishing with a \r\npaternal hug from Doctor Bierce.\r\n\r\nIn his cell a guard delivers Casanova his favorite old disco suit \r\n(that's been waiting far him for twenty years).\r\n\r\nCasanova, dressed in the suit, walks down the central aisle of the \r\nlock-up... A moment later he steps out of the massive gates of the \r\nhospital, and takes his first deep breath of freedom... while in an \r\noffice window high above Bierce and the members of the review board \r\nstand watching, very proud...\r\n\r\nBut suddenly THE MUSIC CHANGES TO SEVENTIES DISCO as a black Ferrari \r\ndrives up, and Doctor Leek, now dressed very sexily, gets out... As the \r\nreview board watches in stunned silence, Casanova and Anabel perform a \r\nnifty little disco twirl, finishing with a very lewd kiss...\r\n\r\nBierce, watching, realizes he's been duped... as Casanova, grinning up \r\nat him, puts a long gold chain (his favorite weapon) around his neck... \r\nBierce, horrified, picks up the telephone... as Casanova and Anabel get \r\nin the car.\r\n\r\nINT. THE CAR - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nCasanova and Anabel drive off. The massive old hospital is seen \r\nthrough the rear window behind them, as Casanova calmly looks at his \r\nwatch...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON HIS WATCH -\r\n\r\nas the second hand just swings toward the twelve. It is exactly twelve \r\nnoon...\r\n\r\nBACK ON CASANOVA -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(almost wistfully)\r\n\t\tBoom.\r\n\r\nAnd the hospital EXPLODES in a HUGE FIREBALL that completely consumes \r\nit.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThose gas leaks can be murder.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE ROAD - DAY\r\n\r\nThe Ferrari drives past and the CAMERA HOLDS ON a sign that reads \r\n\"We1come to Champion City, home of Captain Amazing\". The city itself, a \r\ncrumbling rust belt metropolis (ala Detroit) can be seen stretched out \r\nalong the shore of Lake Champion off in the distance...\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE CAR - CONTINUOUS - ON CASANOVA\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI'm home.\r\n\r\nBACK ON THE ROAD - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Ferrari drives under a much larger billboard that looms over the \r\nroad, showing a picture of Captain Amazing himself, a square jawed \r\nclassic superhero, staring fiercely into the camera. The caption reads \r\n\"Crime. Don't even think about it.\"\r\n\r\nEXT. TRAIN YARDS OF CHAMPION CITY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nLetters read \"Six months later\"...\r\n\r\nas the CAMERA EXPLORES the desolate muddy terrain of the train yards, \r\nCRUISING past piles of tires and abandoned train cars...\r\n\r\nCAMERA PICKS UP a battered van as it drives through the yard, then \r\npulls up beside an old boxcar. The back of the van is thrown open, a \r\nramp is thrown down, and THE RED EYES, a gang of vicious small time \r\nthieves (all of whom wear sunglasses with red lenses) start unloading \r\ntheir night's haul... RED EYE 1 drives a golf cart, with clubs, down \r\nthe ramp.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 1\r\n\t\tGolf anyone?\r\n\r\nSeveral more Red Eyes emerge carrying a sawn off bike rack with bikes \r\nstill attached, a barber pole, a Virgin Mary lawn statue, and a top of \r\nthe line baby stroller... while their leader, BIG RED, stands in the \r\ndoor to the boxcar, watching approvingly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 2\r\n\t\tNot a bad night's work.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tWho said crime don't pay?\r\n\r\nThe Red Eyes laugh... as Red Eye 3 takes the cover off the baby \r\nstroller and sees... that there's a BABY still in it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 3\r\n\t\tHey, Boss, we got a stowaway.\r\n\r\nThe crooks gather around the baby, a jolly little kid who just laughs \r\nat them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 4\r\n\t\t\t\t(about to slug him)\r\n\t\tWho you laughin' at, punk?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 2\r\n\t\tHe's just a tyke. Lighten up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 5\r\n\t\tHe's kinda cute.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 3\r\n\t\tIf you like drool.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 2\r\n\t\tHey, why don't we sell him back to his parents? \r\n\t\tFor a million bucks!\r\n\r\nThe others think that's a great idea, but Big Red doesn't.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tAnd what if he rats on us?\r\n\r\nThe others hadn't thought of that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 3\r\n\t\tSo what should we do with him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tStick a brick in his Pampers and dump him in \r\n\t\tthe lake.\r\n\r\nThe others think that's a good idea and look around for a brick.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYE 3\r\n\t\tCome on, kid, you're goin' for a swim.\r\n\r\nBut suddenly there is another presence... A man in a blue turban and \r\ncape with the initials \"BR\" on his chest has appeared... He is THE BLUE \r\nRAJA.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNot so fast, gentlemen--and I use the term \r\n\t\tloosely... Unhand that youngster...\r\n\r\nAnother man steps into the light. He wears a construction helmet and \r\nmask. There is an \"S\" on his chest, and he carries an old shovel. He \r\nis THE SHOVELER.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tOr you're mulch.\r\n\r\nHe brandishes his shovel for effect. The Red Eyes look at these two, \r\nhighly amused.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tWhat are you guys supposed to be... \r\n\t\tsuperheroes?\r\n\r\nA third man steps out. His costume is less dramatic than the others. \r\nHe wears only an old leather jacket and a faded, torn shirt with flames \r\non it, but the fierce look on his face and the atrociousness of his \r\nhaircut make it very clear that he is the craziest and most dangerous \r\nof the three. He is MISTER FURIOUS.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWe ARE superheroes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tReally? Did you mother make those costumes?\r\n\r\nThe crooks howl with laughter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tThis is our territory. Beat it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tOver YOUR dead body.\r\n\r\nBig Red turns to the others and shakes with pretended fear.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\t0ooooo, he's scary.\r\n\r\nThe Red Eyes laugh, but suddenly, a small silver projectile whizzes \r\nthrough the air and implants itself in Big Red's backside. He howls \r\nwith pain, pulls it out and examines it... It's a silver dessert fork.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tA fork!\r\n\r\nThe Raja holds up his hands, each of which hold a spread of silver \r\nforks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd there's plenty more where that came from.\r\n\r\nBig Red gives a shrill whistle, and a dozen more Red Eyes step out of \r\nan old caboose... including MIKEY, a four hundred pound behemoth. He \r\nis eating a container of Ben and Jerry's like it was an ice cream cone, \r\ntaking huge bites out of it, container and all.\r\n\r\nRAJA AND SHOVELER, reacting... Gulp. This was more than they'd \r\nbargained for. But Furious just growls; he's game.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBIG RED\r\n\t\tGET 'EM!\r\n\r\nThe Red Eyes attack... Mister Furious goes into a furious face; his \r\nhair stands out straight and he rushes right into the oncoming \r\ncrooks...\r\n\r\nA Red Eye takes a swing at the Shoveler--but he simply puts up his \r\nshovel and lets the crook slug the shovel's pan. The crook yelps with \r\npain and shakes his battered hand... as the Raja fends off crooks, \r\npoking them with salad forks... and the baby sits in his stroller, \r\nwatching and laughing, really enjoying the show. (There's no real \r\nmartial artistry or teamwork here; this is a classic back alley \r\nbrouhaha.)\r\n\r\nBut there's too many of then... The Raja goes down under swinging \r\nfists... and so does the Shoveler...\r\n\r\nFurious holds his own, taking out crooks with powerful lefts and \r\nrights--until Mikey runs him down like a truck, falling right on top of \r\nhim and crushing him under his massive weight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYES\r\n\t\tCrush him, Mikey!... Mash him!... Mush him!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t(barely audible under all that meat)\r\n\t\tIs that all you got?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYES\r\n\t\tHe wants more!... Squish him!... Finish him \r\n\t\toff!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(faintly)\r\n\t\tYour mother!\r\n\r\nMikey, sweating, bears down... but suddenly, a calm, very authoritative \r\nvoice is heard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tVOICE (0.S.)\r\n\t\tIs there a problem?\r\n\r\nEverything suddenly stops, as the Red Eyes look up and see... CAPTAIN \r\nAMAZING standing on tap of the boxcar, hands on hips, framed in the \r\nlight at the moon, his biceps bulging, his state of the art physique \r\nsculpted body armor gleaming in the moonlight, his cape wafting \r\nheroically in the wind. He is superhero perfection incarnate.\r\n\r\nON THE RED EYES as their viciousness turns instantly to panic...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYES\r\n\t\tIT'S CAPTAIN AMAZING!\r\n\r\nBig Red and a couple others try to run for it, but Amazing leaps ca-\r\nlike off the boxcar and is on them in a flash. As the baby claps his \r\nhands in delight, and our three heroes watch in beat-up awe, Amazing \r\ndeftly takes out the crooks with expert punches and effortlessly \r\ndelivered elbows and kicks. He is the consumate superhero, and he \r\ndoesn't even break a sweat.\r\n\r\nThe remaining Red Eyes drop to their knees and throw up their hands in \r\nsurrender.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRED EYES\r\n\t\tWe give!... We're sorry!... We had terrible \r\n\t\tchildhoods! (Etc.)\r\n\r\nPolice cars and a TV truck come screeching into the train yard... and \r\nthe scene is suddenly flooded vith light and swarming with cops and \r\nreporters...\r\n\r\nOur three heroes try to approach Captain Amazing (who still looks fresh \r\nas a daisy).\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNice work, Captain.\r\n\r\nBut Amazing just walks past them, ignoring them completely, as if they \r\ndidn't even exist. He goes to greet DAWN WONG (Champion City's answer \r\nto Connie Chung).\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\t\t(turning on the old superhero charm)\r\n\t\tHi. Dawn.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDAWN\r\n\t\t\t(putty in his hands, pudding in his bowl)\r\n\t\tLooks like you've done it again, Captain.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tIt's what I do.\r\n\r\nOur heroes just watch, feeling ignored, humiliated. Furious growls. \r\nSuddenly, TWO COPS are accosting them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 1\r\n\t\tOkay, show's over. Move it. On your way.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWait a minute, Officers. You don't understand--\r\n\t\twe're superheroes, and we just busted up this \r\n\t\tgang.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 1\r\n\t\tReally? Let me guess-you're Towel Head and \r\n\t\the's...\r\n\t\t\t\t(meaning the Shoveler)\r\n\t\tCaptain Pooper Scooper!\r\n\r\nThe cops crack up. Furious growls at them. The cops yank out their \r\nnightsticks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 1\r\n\t\tHey! Move it!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 2\r\n\t\tGet a life!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 1\r\n\t\tAnd leave crime fighting to the real thing!\r\n\r\nShoveler and Raja pull Furious away before he gets into real trouble... \r\nThe cops watch as our three heroes disappear into the night.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 1\r\n\t\tWannabes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCOP 2\r\n\t\tPathetic.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE LAKESIDE DINER - NIGHT - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nAn inner city greasy spoon.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - CONTINUOUS - CLOSE ON A TV SCREEN\r\n\r\non which Captain Amazing, the laughing baby in his arms, is being \r\ninterviewed by Dawn Wong. He's playing the cutsy photo op for all its \r\nworth, gootchy-gooing the kid, etc. Dawn is creaming.\r\n\r\nOur three heroes sit at a booth in the back of the diner, watching the \r\ntube...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t(nursing a sore jaw)\r\n\t\tHe doesn't miss a trick, does he?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhat a jerk--and like nobody knows who he really is!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tOh don't start that again--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tLOOK!\r\n\r\nFurious picks up the newspaper on which there is a photo of a good \r\nlooking guy in a tux at a benefit... The headline reads \"Lance Hunt \r\nHosts Benefit.\" He holds the picture up next to the television, so the \r\nfaces of Lance Hunt and Captain Amazing are side by side. It is \r\nobviously the same guy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHe's Lance Hunt! Just take off the glasses--\r\n\t\tand it's him!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThere's a vague similarity.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tA vague similarity? IT'S THE SAME GUY!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\t\t\t(downing some aspirin)\r\n\t\t0h, who gives a damn who he is? I can't take \r\n\t\tthis anymore. Night after night we're on the \r\n\t\tstreets, busting our humps--and for what?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWe take the licks and he gets the chicks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHow long do you have to chase a dream before \r\n\t\tyou realize it's not gonna happen?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWe need a break, that's all! Nobody'd ever \r\n\t\theard of him until he busted Casanova \r\n\t\tFrankenstein!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut look at him... and look at us.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThe camera loves him.\r\n\r\nA depressed silence. Furious turns his attention to the napkin \r\ndispenser.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (furious)\r\n\t\tWhy do they always fill stuff these things so \r\n\t\tfull you can't pull 'em out without ripping \r\n\t\t'em!\r\n\t\t\t\t (rips one out)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI lost another fork tonight. She's getting \r\n\t\tsuspicious, I know it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSo why don't you just tell her!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI can't.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhy not?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t (upset)\r\n\t\tBecause I can't! Okay? She wouldn't \r\n\t\tunderstand!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tLeave him alone. She's his mother, not yours.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWe had an off night, that's all.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tSo when are we gonna have an on night?\r\n\r\nA WAITRESS is standing at the table.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tWAITRESS\r\n\t\tHi.\r\n\r\nThey look at her, taken aback. She's very pretty.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tYou're... new.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tWAITRESS\r\n\t\tIt's my first night. My name's Monica.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON FURIOUS, smitten by her, but almost afraid to look at her. \r\nUnder all that rage, he's in fact shy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tYou guys going to a costume party?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWe're superheroes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tReally? Like Captain Amazing?\r\n\r\nFurious growls.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tAre you famous?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNot yet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tSo you're like... struggling superheroes?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWe prefer to think of ourselves as unsung... I \r\n\t\tam the Blue Raja, Master of Silverware...\r\n\t\t\t\t(does a very impressive\r\n\t\t\t\tlittle flipping thing with\r\n\t\t\t\this place setting)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWow.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd these are my associatiates, the Shoveler.\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHi.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd Mister Furious... His anger is his power.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\t\t\t(intrigued by Furious)\r\n\t\tReally?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tUsually a superpower is a magical endowment or \r\n\t\ta great skill. In his case, it's entirely \r\n\t\temotional.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tSo what can I get you?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBurgers all around.\r\n\t\t\t\t(meaning himself)\r\n\t\tMedium.\r\n\t\t\t\t(meaning the Shoveler)\r\n\t\tRare.\r\n\t\t\t\t(meaning Furious}\r\n\t\tRaw.\r\n\r\nA moment later as Monica walks away, Furious can't help but\r\nwatch her. The Raja replaces the diner's dinnerware with the good \r\nstuff from his coat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tShe likes you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tDefinitely.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAsk her out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNah.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tRoy, when was the last time you had an actual \r\n\t\tdate?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(getting very pissed off)\r\n\t\tWhat does it matter? Women just want to \r\n\t\tcontrol you--and talk about their feelings. \r\n\t\tThey want to know why you're angry all the \r\n\t\ttime--and what can they can do to help--so you \r\n\t\ttell them there's nothing--nothing--just leave \r\n\t\tme alone--but they bug you and they bug you and \r\n\t\tthey bug you--until you just can't stand it \r\n\t\tanymore!--so you finally open up--you pop like \r\n\t\ta blister--and it all comes spewing out--all \r\n\t\tyour emotions--your feelings--your fears--all \r\n\t\tof it!\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(after a beat)\r\n\t\tAnd then they dump you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tSo you're chicken?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (fiercely)\r\n\t\tWho's chicken?\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(gets up)\r\n\r\nMonica stands at the counter placing her order. Furious approaches \r\nher, leans against the counter. For a moment he just stands there, \r\nfuming, unable to think of anything to say. She isn't sure what to make \r\nof this.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tDoesn't it piss you off the way the when you \r\n\t\treally want to talk to somebody you can't think \r\n\t\tof anything to say!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI guess... Are you always so angry?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tOnly when I'm awake... You busy after work?\r\n\r\nShe shrugs.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWant to go out and get drunk?\r\n\r\nShe's visibly turned off by that.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tOr talk?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tNot tonight.\r\n\t\t\t(picks up an order and walks away)\r\n\r\nEXT. OUTSIDE THE DINER - LATER\r\n\r\nFurious, the Raja, and the Shoveler step out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMaybe you should try a more romantic approach.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t(gets on his old Harley)\r\n\t\tLike what? Cutting off my own ear?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOr flowers.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSee ya tomorrow.\r\n\r\nFurious kicks his engine started and speeds off into the night as the \r\nShoveler opens the door of his battered Ford Esquire station wagon, and \r\nthe Raja gets into his ancient Datsun.\r\n\r\nEXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler pulls into the driveway of his very modest house. The \r\nfront yard looks like a battle zone. Bikes and kids' junk are \r\neverywhere.\r\n\r\nLIVING ROOM - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nas big a disaster area as the front yard. His kids, EDDIE JR. (15), \r\nLENORE (12), BUTCH (10), TRACY (7), and ROLAND (5) are all sprawled in \r\nfront of the television. The Shoveler enters, and his kids don't even \r\nbother to look up from the tube.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHey, when are you guys gonna clean this place \r\n\t\tup?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTRACY\r\n\t\tWhen you're on TV.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tRight--like that will ever happen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLENORE\r\n\t\tSave any babies lately?\r\n\r\nON THE SHOVELER, silent, hurt.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTRACY\r\n\t\tFaster than a speeding turtle--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBUTCH\r\n\t\tMore powerful than a deodorant--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tAble to eat twelve donuts in a single sitting--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLENORE\r\n\t\tLook, snoring in his chair--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tSitting on the john--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tIt's... Supergut!\r\n\r\nThe kids all laugh (in that derisive way that kids do so well) as the \r\nShoveler dejectedly walks into the kitchen.\r\n\r\nINT. KITCHEN - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler enters, dejected. His wife, Lucille, is doing the dishes. \r\nShe looks up, sees him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLUCILLE\r\n\t\t\t\t (feels for him)\r\n\t\tRough night, Eddie?\r\n\r\nHe nods.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE RAJA'S HOUSE - NIGHT - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nThe Raja's Datsun is parked in front of a neat as a pin little \r\nVictorian house.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINING ROOM - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe room is dark. Someone is sneaking around. A drawer is quietly \r\nopened, and we hear the gentle clink of silver. Suddenly, the light \r\ngoes on and we see the Blue Raja, now dressed in a sport shirt and \r\nslacks, with his hand in the drawer. His MOTHER, in her nightclothes, \r\nstands by the door where she has just switched on the light.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tJeffrey!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOh hi, Mom.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tWhat are you doing in the silver drawer?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tLooking for... the TV Guide.\r\n\r\nShe just looks at him, very suspicious.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tIt's on the television.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOf course. I'm such a fool... Thanks, Mummy. \r\n\t\tGo to bed.\r\n\r\nHe kisses her and goes into the next room. CAMERA HOLDS ON MOM; she \r\ndoesn't trust him.\r\n\r\nEXT. HILLTOP - NIGHT - ANGLE ON\r\n\r\nA billboard overlooking the city. Captain Amazing is posed wearing a \r\npair of bright blue Nikes. The caption reads. \"It's a nice world. \r\nSonebody's got to save it... The Nike Supershoe. It's Amazing.\"\r\n\r\nFurious sits on his Harley, taking long hauls from a pint bottle of \r\ncheap bourbon and gazing up at the sign.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAmazing? What's so amazing about him? I'd be \r\n\t\tamazing, too, if I'd inherited two hundred \r\n\t\tmillion bucks... or two bucks... or two \r\n\t\tcents...\r\n\t\t\t(hurls the empty bottle, smashing\r\n\t\t\t\tit against the sign)\r\n\t\tWho am I kidding? Dreams don't come true.\r\n\r\nA moment of despondency, and then he hears a strange sound overhead and \r\nlooks up...\r\n\r\nHIS POV -\r\n\r\nas something suddenly flies across the star filled night sky above \r\nhim...\r\n\r\nIt is Captain Amazing, wearing a high tech rocket pack on his back...\r\n\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhere's he going?\r\n\t\t\t(kicks his Harley started)\r\n\r\nSERIES OF SHOTS - WITH MUSIC\r\n\r\nas Furious, following Captain Amazing, rides roughshod down the steep \r\nhill, skidding onto a road and then speeding through a residential \r\narea...\r\n\r\nHe cuts onto some railroad tracks, hops his bike up on a rail, and \r\nrides smoothly along it, following Amazing... He turns off the tracks, \r\nrides roughly through some woods, then emerges from the trees and \r\nsees..\r\n\r\nA foreboding looking old mansion... Captain Amazing lands on the \r\nhighest part of its roof... Furious pulls up, gazes at the front gates \r\nof the mansion...\r\n\r\nHIS POV -\r\n\r\nLetters across the iron gates read... \"Frankenstein\".\r\n\r\nEXT. ON THE ROOF - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCaptain Amazing abandons his jet pack and moves across the old slate \r\nroof like Spiderman, leaping nimbly from gable to gable and walking \r\nalong a high ridge like a tight rope walker. Finally he approaches a \r\nskylight, looks down and sees...\r\n\r\nA huge old library with an iron catwalk running around it. Casanova \r\nFrankenstein sits in a club chair by a roaring tire. Anabel perches on \r\nthe arm of his chair. In the other chair sits a once good looking, now \r\npaunchy guy, with a meticulously coiffed haircut. He is TONY \r\nPOMPADOUR, head of the infamous Disco Boys.\r\n\r\n0N CAPTAIN AMAZING\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\t\t\t(just as he suspected)\r\n\t\tUh-huh.\r\n\r\nHe sees that the skylight is open, and quietly lets himself in...\r\n\r\nINT. THE LIBRARY - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova and Tony P savor glasses of brandy and puff on big cigars.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI hope you enjoy these cigars. I had to kill a \r\n\t\tdozen Cubans to get them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tUmmm.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tHave you considered my offer?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tYou know, Mr. F, me and the boys always loved \r\n\t\tworkin' for you. You had such style: the \r\n\t\tclothes, the dancin', the elegant way you'd \r\n\t\tsnuff a babe. You were the King...\r\n\r\nCasanova accepts this graciously.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tBut times have changed, and you been in that \r\n\t\tbug house a long tine. I can see you still got \r\n\t\tthe style, but I dunno for sure you still got \r\n\t\tthe edge.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI got it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tWhat about Captain Amazing?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING (O.S.)\r\n\t\tGood question.\r\n\r\nCasanova and Tony P look up and see Captain Amazing, posed noncalantly \r\non the iron catwalk, gazing down at them. Tony P jumps out of his \r\nchair, scared. But Casanova just smiles at his ancient rival, cool as \r\na cucumber.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI knew you'd cone. I left that skylight open \r\n\t\tfor you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tI know you did.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI knew you'd know.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tI know you knew I'd know.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tBut did you know I knew you'd know I'd know?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tOf course.\r\n\r\nTony P makes a move for his pistol, but Captain Amazing instantly whips \r\nout his pistol, getting the drop on him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tI'd hate to waste a good bullet on a piece of \r\n\t\tscum like you, Tony.\r\n\r\nTony freezes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tThe jig is up, Casanova. I've spent six months \r\n\t\twatching you, and know exactly what you're up \r\n\t\tto.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tReally?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tI know that you're recruiting your old \r\n\t\thenchmen...\r\n\r\nNervous reaction from Tony P.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tI know who your girlfriend really is...\r\n\r\nIcy reaction from Anabel.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tAnd I know the terrible revenge that you plan \r\n\t\tto inflict on this city.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI guess you know just about everything, don't \r\n\t\tyou, Lance?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tUm-hmm.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tExcept for one little thing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\t\t\t(supremely confident)\r\n\t\tAnd what's that?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThat I've hot wired the city's entire power \r\n\t\tsupply through that catwalk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\tWhat--?\r\n\r\nCasanova suddenly throws a secret breaker switch, and the ugly hum of a \r\nmillion volts instantly fills the room...\r\n\r\nEXT. OUTSIDE THE HOUSE - CONTINUOUS - ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nstill watching... as all the lights in the house go out, except for a \r\nfrightening orange glow in an upper room...\r\n\r\nOff in the distance Furious sees... the lights of the entire city \r\nflicker and then black out... A moment later the mansion, and the \r\ncity's lights return to normal... as Furious watches, not sure what to \r\nmake of this.\r\n\r\nEXT. STREET CONSTRUCTION SITE - DAY\r\n\r\nTraffic is snarled. Horns are blasting. Tempers are frayed.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON A HAMMERING JACKHAMMER... CAMERA WIDENS TO REVEAL that it is \r\nbeing operated by the Shoveler, dressed in work clothes. Wiped out \r\nfrom the night before, the vibrations of the hamer are lulling him off \r\nto sleep... He nods out... as his BOSS whacks him on the arm.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOSS\r\n\t\tYO! CAPTAIN SOMINEX! Get your shut-eye at \r\n\t\thome, or you'll be a full time superhero!\r\n\r\nEXT. THE RAJA'S HOUSE - DAY - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nINT. THE RAJA'S ROOM - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Raja lies sprawled on his bed, depressed, still in his pee jays, as \r\nhe watches... an ANTHONY ROBBINS infomercial ON THE TV.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANTHONY\r\n\t\tIt's all within your power. The only thing \r\n\t\tthat's in your way is YOU!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tEasy for you to say.\r\n\r\nEXT. SALLY'S AUTO DEMOLITION - DAY - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nAn auto junkyard and demotion yard.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE YARD - DAY\r\n\r\nA giant press mashes an old car... while nearby Mister Furious does the \r\njob by hand, demolishing an old Grand Prix with an iron bar. He does \r\nit as easily as a normal guy would tear apart a corrugated box, ripping \r\noff the doors, then tearing off the bumpers and the hood and tossing \r\nthe pieces onto a big pile... His big boned, red faced boss SALLY is \r\ncalling out to him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSALLY\r\n\t\tHey, Roy!\r\n\r\nEXT. THE BACK OF THE YARD - A MINUTE LATER\r\n\r\nIn a weedy overgrown far corner of the junkyard Sally and Furious stand \r\nlooking a big old hunk of a military vehicle. It is a Herkimer Battle \r\nJitney, a heavily armored, windowless, soundproof, personnel carrier \r\n(designed by the Pentagon in the fifties to take congressmen on \r\nbattlefield fact finding tours). Overgrown with weeds, home to an \r\nextended family of pigeons, its fighting days (if it ever had any) are \r\nover.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSALLY\r\n\t\tHow many times I gotta tell you about this?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSally, that's a Herkimer Battle Jitney! They \r\n\t\tdon't make 'em like that anymore. It's a \r\n\t\tclassic!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSALLY\r\n\t\tIt's a hunk of junk. I want the iron. Do it!\r\n\r\nShe walks away. Furious growls. He picks up his iron bar and is about \r\nto wedge it under the front bumper of the Herkimer...\r\n\r\nHIS POV -\r\n\r\nBut the big old headlights and the sad old grill seem to be looking at \r\nhint, imploring him for one last chance...\r\n\r\nAnd he just can't do it. He throws away his iron bar and climbs inside \r\nthe cab of the Herkimer...\r\n\r\nIN THE CAB - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nFurious sits behind the wheel and tenderly touches its beat-up old \r\ndashboard, then turns on the radio, which, miraculously still works. \r\nHe tunes in a local station, puts his feet up on the dash.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRADIO ANNOUNCER\r\n\t\t...and continues to deny any knowledge of the \r\n\t\tincident... In local news, millionaire Lance \r\n\t\tHunt has apparently disappeared...\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS, taking immediate notice.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRADIO ANNOUNCER\r\n\t\tMembers at his household told police that the \r\n\t\tplayboy philanthropist failed to return home \r\n\t\tlast night after \"going out for a walk\". \r\n\t\tPolice say they have no reason yet to suspect \r\n\t\tfoul play, but a search is under way...\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nFurious, the Shoveler, and the Raja all sit at their booth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI saw him go in--and he didn't come out!\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut we don't know for sure it's the same guy.\r\n\r\nFurious groans.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHey, look.\r\n\r\nON THE TV -\r\n\r\nCasanova is being interviewed by DON STOUFFER, the local Mike Wallace.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWell, Don, I've done some terrible things in my \r\n\t\tlife, but now I'm cured, and I just want to \r\n\t\tgive back something to my old home town... \r\n\t\tThat's why I'm using what's left of my fortune \r\n\t\tto build...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON A MODEL of a huge concrete bunker-like institutional structure \r\n(i.e. the Getty)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThe Frankenstein Center for the Arts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDON\r\n\t\tYou've changed, haven't you?\r\n\r\n\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tOh yes.\r\n\r\nBACK ON FURIOUS, RAJA, and SHOVELER - \r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNo he hasn't.\r\n\r\nEXT. FRANKENSTEIN MANSION - NIGHT - ANGLE ON\r\n\r\nthe wall of the estate... as our heroes' three heads rise up over \r\nit... and survey the grounds.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(about to climb over)\r\n\t\tLet's go.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t(in a whisper, holding him back)\r\n\t\tWait!... Look!\r\n\r\nTHEIR POV -\r\n\r\nA group of men are hanging around the door to the house, smoking, \r\nchatting, and laughing. A CLOSER ANGLE REVEALS that they are all \r\ndressed in the height (or depths) of seventies disco fashion. One of \r\nthem is showing off some steps.\r\n\r\nOur heroes fall back behind the safety of the wall and confer.\r\n\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThis is bad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWho are they?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThe Disco Boys.\r\n\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tThe who?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThe most vicious gang of thugs this city ever \r\n\t\tproduced. Twenty years ago they were \r\n\t\tCasanova's personal bodyguard. But after he \r\n\t\twas busted they crawled into the woodwork.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWell they've crawled back out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWe may be getting in over our heads here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThis looks like a job for Superman--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tOr Batman--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOr both.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tDon't you guys get it? If Captain Amazing is \r\n\t\tstill in there, we can rescue him--and get on \r\n\t\tTV!\r\n\t\t\t (goes right over the wall)\r\n\r\nThey share an exasperated look, then scramble over the wall after him.\r\n\r\nINT. CASANOVA'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova and Dr. Anabel Leek are preparing for bed. Anabel sits in \r\nfront of a huge mirror, brushing her long hair as Casanova moves up \r\nbehind her and puts his hands around her throat, massaging, squeezing, \r\njust barely resisting the temptation to strangle her. (She loves it).\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tEverything's going exactly as we planned.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\t\t(puts the sharp point of her\r\n\t\t\tcomb handle under his chin)\r\n\t\tNot quite. You haven't announced our \r\n\t\tengagement yet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tIt must have slipped my mind.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tYour mind is so slippery.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDon't worry, Pootchkie. My womanizing days are \r\n\t\tover. You're my Lady Macbeth, my Imelda... my \r\n\t\tNicole.\r\n\t\t\t\t(pulls her into his arms)\r\n\t\tWe're such an incredible team. Who could \r\n\t\tpossibly stop us?\r\n\t\t(kisses her)\r\n\r\nCUT RIGHT TO:\r\n\r\nEXT. THE LAWN - CONTINUOUS - ON OUR THREE HEROES\r\n\r\nas they crunch their way non too stealthily across the backyard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tDon't crunch the leaves.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tSorry.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBe a Mohican.\r\n\t \t\t (bumps into a lawn chair)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWait.\r\n\t\t\t\t(They all stop.)\r\n\t\tI hear something.\r\n\r\nThey all listen; there is a low rushing sound... It is the sound of \r\nwater rushing through pipes. Suddenly, the lawn sprinklers all pop \r\nup... and our heroes get drenched. They duck off the lawn, behind the \r\ncover of a large tree.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI'm soaked.\r\n\t\t\t\t (sneezes)\r\n\t\tOh great.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tShhh.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tBe a Mohican. \r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tShut up.\r\n\r\nFurious sees a pair of French doors, off a small patio. One of the \r\ndoors is slightiy open.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tCome on.\r\n\r\nThey start sneaking toward it, but as they cross the patio... they trip \r\nthe automatic security lighting, and suddenly find themselves bathed in \r\nlight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tUh-oh.\r\n\r\nAs our heroes look around as a dozen Disco Boys, armed with pipes, \r\nchains, brass knuckles, step into the light and encircle them... The \r\nFrench doors open and Tony P steps out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOh I'm sorry. We must have the wrong house.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tYou sure do.\r\n\r\nThe Disco Boys attack. The Raja is instantly clubbed down. The \r\nShoveler deflects only a blow or two with his shovel before he goes \r\ndown, too... These guys are not the Red Eyes.\r\n\r\nOnly Furious holds his own. He grabs a pipe away from one of them and \r\nswings fiercely, keeping the others off. Suddenly, the Disco Boys pull \r\nback. Furious doesn't know why, until he turns and sees...\r\n\r\nCasanova, standing right behind him, smiling.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tHi there.\r\n\r\nWith a cat-like move Casanova slashes his gold chain viciously--and \r\nrepeatedly--across Furious' face. Furious, stunned with pain, lunges \r\nat Casanova, who neatly steps aside, then catches him with a fast \r\ncombination of spinning disco kicks. Finally he lassos the chain \r\naround Furious' neck, and pulls it tight, strangling him.\r\n\r\nON THE DISCO BOYS, watching, snapping their fingers with admiration...\r\n\r\nCasanova releases Furious, who slumps to the ground. Casanova steps \r\naway, and the Disco Boys gather around Furious and kick him \r\nviciously... as Casanova and Tony P watch, amused, chuckling.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tSuperheroes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tShould I kill them?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(completely disdainful)\r\n\t\tWhy bother?\r\n\r\nEXT. JUST OUTSIDE THE MANSION - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nThe Disco Boys drag our heroes through the gate and throw them like \r\nbags of garbage into the street... where thay lie in a moaning, \r\nagonized, semi-conscious heap.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - LATER - CLOSE ON\r\n\r\nFurious, rubbing his neck; a thin red mark runs around it. The three of \r\nthem are sitting at their usual table, in very bad shape, moaning and \r\ngroaning... Monica approaches. She's made them ice packs and cold \r\ncompresses.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tHere you go.\r\n\t\t\t(sits with them, applies a compress\r\n\t\t\t\tto the Raja's head)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOw.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tMaybe you guys ought to forget this Superhero \r\n\t\tstuff and join Kiwanis or something.\r\n\r\nA FUSSY CUSTOMER is calling out from another table.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFUSSY CUSTORER\r\n\t\tMiss!\r\n\r\nShe moves off.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMaybe she's right.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(still furious)\r\n\t\tAre you serious? This is the break we've been \r\n\t\twaiting for!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWhat are you talking about?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhat have the famous superheroes got that we \r\n\t\tdon't?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAgents?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tArchenemies! Casanova isn't just a criminal--\r\n\t\the's a supervillain. Stopping him could be our \r\n\t\tticket to fame, fortune--and babes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAnd it would be the right thing to do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (dismissively)\r\n\t\tYeah yeah--and that, too.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut there's only three of us, and he's got the \r\n\t\tentire brotherhood of evil at his disposal.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tThen maybe it's time for us to form our own \r\n\t\tbrotherhood...\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(more)\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS (Cont'd)\r\n\t\ta brotherhood of righteous, crime fighting, \r\n\t\tskull cracking, Disco Boy bashing, warriors of \r\n\t\tthe night!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tI'm liking this.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI say we send out the word--and summon all of \r\n\t\tthe unsung superheroes we know!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t(after a moment)\r\n\t\tYeah, but... who do we know?\r\n\r\nThey take a long moment to ponder this.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWell... there's the Spleen.\r\n\r\nShoveler and Raja make disgusted noises.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tDo we have to?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tI got this cousin. He's a real doofus, but he \r\n\t\tclaims he can become invisible.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHave you ever seen him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHow could I see him if he's invisible?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS \r\n\t\tGood point.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd there's the Sphinx.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThe who?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tHe's a legendary masked Mexican crime fighting \r\n\t\tsuperwrestler and master of the machete.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSounds good.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNo one's sure that he actually exists, but they \r\n\t\tsay he can be contacted by leaving a message on \r\n\t\ta crumpled up napkin at the Tacky Taco down by \r\n\t\tthe bus station.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tGet outta here.\r\n\r\nEXT. TACKY TACO - DAY - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nA funky Mexican restaurant by the bus station.\r\n\r\nINT. THE RESTAURANT - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes, in normal clothing, have just finished a taco lunch. \r\nFurious is writing a mssage on a napkin with a ballpoint pen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tYou sure that's how you spell it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON THE NOTE -\r\n\r\nwhich reads \"Spinks, we need you.\"\r\n\r\nThey crumple up the napkin and leave the restaurant... A moment later a \r\nshy looking MEXICAN MAN busses their tray... but in A CLOSE ANGLE we \r\nsee him secretly pocket the napkin.\r\n\r\nEXT. HOUSE - DAY - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nA little brick house.\r\n\r\nINT. INVISIBLE BOY'S ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nA teenage boy's room, decorated to the max with models and posters of \r\nthe great superheroes: Batman, Spiderman, Captain Amazing, etc. \r\nINVISIBLE BOY, about fifteen, is being interviewed by the Raja, Mister \r\nFurious, and the Shoveler.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSo, let me get this straight. You have the \r\n\t\tpower to become invisible.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut... only when no one is looking.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIf someone looks at you, you immediately become \r\n\t\tvisible again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tSo you're only invisible... to yourself?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tNo.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tOUR HEROES\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(hopefully)\r\n\t\tNo?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tIf I look at myseif, I become visible.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tSo you're only invisible, when abuolutely no \r\n\t\tone is looking at you?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSo how do you know that you've ever been \r\n\t\tinvisible?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tI just know.\r\n\r\nOur heroes are less than impressed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tLook, kid, we've got a lot of heroes to \r\n\t\tinterview--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(desperate)\r\n\t\tI know I haven't got it entirely worked out \r\n\t\tyet, but I've always dreamed of becoming a \r\n\t\tsuperhero... Weren't you guys ever a kid? \r\n\t\tDidn't you ever need someone to just give you a \r\n\t\tchance?\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES, looking around the room... and softening up.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - NIGHT\r\n\r\nOur heroes sit at their usual table along with Invisible Boy and a \r\nweird looking guy in a greasy, stained yellow superhero outfit. Across \r\nhis chest in falling off stick on letters it reads \"THE SPLEEN\", and \r\nthat's exactly who he is. Furious, the Raja, and Shoveler sit as far \r\naway from him as possible. He is a totally noxious, hyperactive \r\nperson... and he is thrilled to be there.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tBoy I can't tell you how thrilled I was when \r\n\t\tyou guys called--You gonna eat that pickle?\r\n\t\t\t\t (sucks it in)\r\n\t\tI've always dreamed of being a member of the a \r\n\t\treal superhero team--and to have friends--real \r\n\t\tfriends--I mean guys I could live with--sleep \r\n\t\twith--die with--eat with...\r\n\r\nHe puts the mustard dispenser to his lips and squeezes it straight into \r\nhis mouth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tI love mustard.\r\n\r\nFurious, Raja, and the Shoveler react; they can't believe they've \r\nactually invited this guy to join their group.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tSo what exactly is your superpower?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tWell, when I was a kid I grew up on Love Canal-\r\n\t\t-remember that?--and my brothers and I used to \r\n\t\tgo swimming in it--make Kool-Aid out of it--\r\n\t\tstuff like that. Anyway my brothers all died, \r\n\t\tbut I lived, and I grew all these like weird \r\n\t\torgans that have never been seen in humans \r\n\t\tbefore. So now I can do things like this!\r\n\r\nHe leans over the table and lets just a little tiny drop of spittle \r\ndribble onto the table...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON THE TABLE -\r\n\r\nas the spittle burns a hole in the Formica.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tCool, huh?\r\n\r\nThe Spleen inadvertently gives the tiniest little burp, and our three \r\nheroes duck out of the way or under the table.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tFURIOUS, RAJA, & SHOVELER\r\n\t\tWatch it!... Look out!... Whoa!\r\n\r\nThe people in the next booth give a cry of revulsion, put their hands \r\nto their mouths, and immediately leave.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tSorry, sorry.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHey, why don't you just put a cork in it?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tI tried that once. The cork melted.\r\n\r\nTHE SAME - AFTER DINNER\r\n\r\nOur heroes mull their situation over coffee. Monica freshens their \r\ncups. The Spleen squirts mustard in his coffee.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThere's just not enough of us.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tBut we know they're out there. Hundreds--maybe \r\n\t\tthousands of lonely, unknown superheroes, who \r\n\t\tdesperately need a cause...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd a social life.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tYeah, but how do we get to them?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tObscene phone calls?\r\n\r\nThey ignore that suggestion.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWhy don't you throw a barbecue?\r\n\t\t\t(moves off to another table)\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES, realizing that's it.\r\n\r\nINT. INVISIBLE BOY'S ROOM - NIGHT - WITH MUSIC\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy sits at the desk in his room, writing immaculate little \r\nnotes on small file cards. (He's made a whole pile of them.)\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON THE NOTE -\r\n\r\nwhich reads \"Got superpowers? Want to fight evil? Then JOIN US and \r\nlet's PARTY HEARTY! Beer! Burgers! Babes!\"\r\n\r\nSERIES OF SHOTS - MUSIC CONTINUES\r\n\r\nas our heroes post these notes all over the city, in places where \r\nlonely superheroes night find them...\r\n\r\nThe Raja posts a note on the door of a comic book store...\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler posts a note on the bulletin board at a bowling alley...\r\n\r\nMr. Furious tapes the note to the cracked glass of a vandalized phone \r\nbooth...\r\n\r\nAt an abandoned drive-in movie theater... Invisible Boy walks through \r\nthe empty lot, taping a note to each of the old speaker posts...\r\n\r\nA White Castle hamburger joint... Inside the pay toilet Spleen is \r\nscratching something on the wall with a nail. He stops and admires his \r\nhandiwork, and we see that he has engraved the entire message on the \r\nwall...\r\n\r\nEND MUSIC.\r\n\r\nEXT. SHOVELER'S BACKYARD - DAY\r\n\r\nA small, typical working class backyard. A round, aluminum above \r\nground pool. A Weber grill with burgers on it. Unopened packages of \r\nhamburger rolls. An old Vic Damon record plays on a boom box. The \r\nSpleen floats around on a rubber raft in the pool.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tCome on in! The water's great!\r\n\r\nIn fact, the water is turning a yellowish green... The rest of our \r\nheroes sit around on cheap folding chairs. No superheroes have shown \r\nup. The Shoveler, at the grill, serves burgers to his kids, who stand \r\nin line waiting for them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBUTCH\r\n\t\t\t\t(heavy on the sarcasm)\r\n\t\tGreat picnic, Dad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tBig turnout.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tROLAND\r\n\t\tAre these guys real superheroes?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLENORE\r\n\t\tThey think so.\r\n\r\nThe kids scoff... A moment later they head back to the house with \r\ntheir burgers.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tROLAND\r\n\t\tBut where's Captain Amazing?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tHe wouldn't be caught dead here.\r\n\r\nThey go into the house. No one says anything. The Shoveler just \r\nstares at the burgers on the grill. Vic Damon sings. Furious chugs his \r\nbeer; he's working himself into a really morose mood.\r\n\r\nON THE SPLEEN, munching on a chlorine tablet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tHey, these pool mints are delicious!\r\n\r\nRaja looks at his watch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMaybe there was traffic.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWho are we kidding? No one's gonna show. \r\n\t\tWe're living in a fantasy!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tCome on, guys--we're fighting against evil.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tGood or evil, what's the difference?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThere's a big difference.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI used to believe that. Now I'm not so sure.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tRoy, remember, it is all within your power. \r\n\t\tThe only thing that's in your way... is you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tOh shut up.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, there is a knock at the gate. Everyone immediately perks up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tThey're here!\r\n\r\nA moment later they open the gate and see... HALF A DOZEN BURLY GUYS \r\nwearing various superhero outfits.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTHEIR LEADER\r\n\t\tHey, man, is this the superhero wingding?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThis is it. Come on in!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSUPERHEROES\r\n\t\tAll right! Party! (Etc.)\r\n\r\nAt first glance these guys seem promising... but their outfits are \r\ndecidedly improvised: weird goggles and sunglasses, shower curtain \r\ncapes, baseball caps with beer cans on them. Their leader holds a \r\nsqueegee with a long handle... Furious is suspicious.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI am the Blue Raja, Master of Silverware.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTHEIR LEADER\r\n\t\tI am Squeegee Man, and these are my compadres, \r\n\t\tthe Invincible Dudes!\r\n\r\nThe Invincible Dudes spot the keg.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDES\r\n\t\tWhoa! Brews! Party! (Etc.)\r\n\r\nThey go immediately to the keg and start filling beer cups and guzzling \r\nthem down. The Raja tries to hand out some forms.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWould you mind filling out these forms; names, \r\n\t\taddresses, description of superpowers, that \r\n\t\tsort of thing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDES\r\n\t\tSure, dude. No problem. (Etc.)\r\n\t\t\t(but they just toss the forms away)\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS, watching, starting to get pissed off.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDE 1\r\n\t\tHey, man, like where are the babes?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDE 2\r\n\t\tIt said on the card there'd be babes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tActually we lied about the babes, but there's \r\n\t\tplenty of burgers.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDES\r\n\t\tThat's false advertising!... We came all the \r\n\t\tway from South Champion, man! We coulda gone \r\n\t\tplinking!... We coulda gone bunqee jumping!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSQUEEGEE MAN\r\n\t\tNo babes. No peace.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE DUDES (chanting)\r\n\t\tNo babes--no peace! No babes--no peace! No \r\n\t\tbabes--no peace!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSQUEEGEE MAN\r\n\t\tLet's trash the place!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDES\r\n\t\tYeah!\r\n\r\nFurious, fed up, confronts Squeegee Man.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIf you're a superhero, what's your power?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSQUEEGEE MAN\r\n\t\tI am Squeegee Man.\r\n\t\t\t(holding it out threateningly)\r\n\t\tTouch my squeegee... and you die.\r\n\r\nThe Invincible Dudes are cracking up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tCan you fly?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSQUEEGEE MAN\r\n\t\tNo.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWanna bet?\r\n\r\nEXT. JUST OUTSIDE THE YARD - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas Squeegee Man comes flying--and screaming--over the fence, landing \r\nnone too gracefully in the front yard.\r\n\r\nA beat and his squeegee come flying out after him. Another beat and \r\nthe Invincible Dudes come running out the gate in a panic.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVINCIBLE DUDES\r\n\t\tLet's get out of here!... That dude's crazy!\r\n\r\nThey take off down the street, running right past a woman, carrying a \r\nbowling ball bag and dressed in a faded, threadbare old rayon superhero \r\ncostume with a decidedly fifties flavor. She is THE BOWLER.\r\n\r\nEXT. SHOVELER'S BACKYARD - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nOur heroes sit around the patio, dejected, miserable.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER (O.S.)\r\n\t\tWho died?\r\n\r\nThey look up, see her standing there, and aren't quite sure what to \r\nmake of her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWho are you?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI'm the Bowler.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThe Bowler? I remember him from when I was a\r\n\t\tkid. He was killed years ago.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI'm his daughter.\r\n\r\nOur heroes share a look.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tLook, honey, being a superhero... it's a\r\n\t\tguy thing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tReally?\r\n\r\nShe takes her bowling ball and spins it on the tip of her finger (like \r\na Harlem Globetrotter). For a long moment she just looks at them, \r\nsmiling.\r\n\r\nON THE OTHERS watching, almost mesmerized by the spinning ball...\r\n\r\nSuddenly, she gives an ear splitting battle cry and starts swinging the \r\nball around her in wide ferocious arcs, like a cannibal with a war \r\nclub--or a twirler on meth, going so fast she almost becomes a blur...\r\n\r\nThen, just as suddenly, she stops, aims and rolls her ball... It shoots \r\nstraight through Invisible Boy's legs...\r\n\r\nON A NEATLY PLACED COLLECTION OF PLASTER LAWN DWARVES -\r\n\r\nas the ball smashes into then, pulverizing them... It goes into a \r\nreverse spin, passes through Invisible Boy's legs again, and returns to \r\nthe Bowler who is holding its bag open for it... The ball rolls in.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tGood ball.\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES, left absolutely speechless.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tIf it could zip up its own bag, then you'd be \r\n\t\timpressed, right?\r\n\r\nShe turns and walks out. Our heroes share an amazed look, then run \r\nafter her...\r\n\r\nJUST OUTSIDE THE GATE - ON THE BOWLER\r\n\r\nwalking away... as Furious catches up with her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHey... Can I buy you a beer?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI thought you'd never ask.\r\n\r\nShe takes his arm and they all start to walk back into the Shoveler's \r\nbackyard... but the CAMERA PANS ACROSS THE STREET to the dark place \r\nbetween two houses, where a MAN WEARING A STRANGE STEEL MASK with a \r\nfrightening, impassively powerful expression stands in the deep \r\nshadows, watching them in motionless, predatory silence. We do not \r\nknow who he is, and we cannot tell if he is good or evil.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE BARBECUE - A LITTLE LATER - CLOSE ON\r\n\r\nA FADED OLD SNAPSHOT of the original \"The Bowler\" holding a little girl \r\nin his arms.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER (O.S.)\r\n\t\tHe was more than just a superhero... He was my \r\n\t\tfather...\r\n\r\nThe others, touched by this, have gathered around the Bowler, who is \r\nholding the old snapshot in her hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tAnd then one day, he didn't come home. The \r\n\t\tpolice said it was an accident. But cargo \r\n\t\tcontainers don't just fall on people. He was \r\n\t\tmurdered... After that I fell apart. I dropped \r\n\t\tout of school, became a mud wrestler, married \r\n\t\tand divorced a jerk. When my mother died I hit \r\n\t\tbottom... but then, when I was cleaning out her \r\n\t\tattic, I found my father's old bowling bag and \r\n\t\tcostume, almost like he'd left them there for \r\n\t\tme... and I knew what I had to do.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tSo who killed him?\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThe Disco Boys.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tYou know something? Those guys are really \r\n\t\tstarting TO PISS ME OFF!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tBut there's still only six of us.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSO WHAT?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThat's two more than the Fantastic Four.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHalf a Dirty Dozen!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tTwice the Three Stooges!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tAnd only one short of the Magnificent Seven.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAnd you can't count Horst Buckholtz anyway.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHe was cute though.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut they all had one thing we haven't got.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tGirlfriends?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tA name. All the great superhero teams have got \r\n\t\ta fabulous name.\r\n\r\nThey all think about it for a moment. You can almost smell their \r\nbrains overheating.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHow about... the Savage Six?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThe Inscrutable Six?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tThe Six Pistols?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThe Exterminators!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tThe Obliterators!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThe Eradicators!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThe Emasculators!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tWait--I got it!... The Spleen Team.\r\n\r\nHe gets beaned by a couple of empty soda cans.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tTo hell with a name. Let's get to work.\r\n\r\nMUSIC UP as Furious stands and starts out. The others stand and follow \r\nhim... as our heroes form up for their first HEROIC GROUP SHOT.\r\n\r\nEXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT\r\n\r\nMUSIC CONTINUES as A LITTLE OLD LADY crosses the street, when suddenly \r\nshe looks up and sees a pair of headlights coming on fast. An \r\nimmaculately maintained seventies limo is heading straight for her.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE LIMO - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nDisco Boys sit in the front. Casanova, Anabel, and Tony P sit in the \r\nback, dressed for a night on the town...\r\n\r\nThere is a thud as the limo hits the old lady, and everyone in the car \r\nexplodes into laughter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tLittle old lady. That's a hundred points!\r\n\r\nINSIDE/OUTSIDE THE LIMO - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\nas the limo drives past a billboard with an ad for \"MILK\" with a milk \r\nmustached Captain Amazing looking at the camera...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tHe knows your every move.\r\n\r\nTony P imitates a massive electrical convulsion, and the villains crack \r\nup.\r\n\r\nBut as they pass the billboard, a pair of headlights illuminate in its \r\nshadows, and the Shoveler's Ford Esquire pulls out and follows.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE ESQUIRE - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler is driving. Mister Furious sits in the front seat next to \r\nhim, and our other heroes are packed into the back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tLet's say hello.\r\n\r\nINSIDE/OUTSIDE THE TWO CARS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nAs the limo stops at a traffic light... and the Esquire pulls up \r\nalongside it. For a moment good and evil stare each other down.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tNot these guys again!\r\n\r\nThe Disco Boys howl with laughter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tNice car.\r\n\r\nThe D Boys laugh. Furious stares at Casanova, and Casanova stares \r\nright back at him, as cool as a snake.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhat did you do with Captain Amazing?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tCaptain who?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\t\t\t(spots the Bowler)\r\n\t\tHey, in the backseat, who are you supposed to \r\n\t\tbe, the Bowler?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI'm his daughter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tHis daughter? Well guess what, sweetheart? \r\n\t\tI'm the one who squished your Daddy. And he \r\n\t\tsquished real good!\r\n\r\nThe villains laugh, and Mister Furious EXPLODES INTO RAGE. He swings \r\nopen his car door, mashing it into the limo and leaving a big dent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tHEY!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t'SCUSE ME!\r\n\r\nHe starts punching the limo like it's a punching bag--putting big dents \r\nin it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY\r\n\t\tWaste him!\r\n\r\nTony and the boys all reach into their coats for their pistols--but as \r\nthey yank them out, the Spleen sticks his head out of the station \r\nwagon, puts his face right up to the open window of the limo and lets \r\nloose with a TREMENDOUS BELCH...\r\n\r\nAs the villains choke and gag in the noxious fumes, Mister Furious goes \r\non a DEMOLITION RAMPAGE, working his way around the limo, punching big \r\ndents with his fists, breaking the windows with his head, flattening \r\nthe tires by kicking them, knocking off the rear view mirror with the \r\nback of his hand...\r\n\r\nThen he leaps up on top of the limo...\r\n\r\nWhile inside the villains gasp for air as big dents are stomped into \r\nthe roof above them...\r\n\r\nANGLE THROUGH THE WINDSHEILD as Furious leaps down onto the hood, and \r\ngazes in at them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tShall I check your oil?\r\n\r\nHe plunges his hand through the metal of the hood, pulls out the car's \r\ndip stick, and checks it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tLooks fine.\r\n\r\nHe tosses the dip stick away, then leaps off JUST AS Tony P gets off a \r\nshot, EXPLODING the windshield of the limo.\r\n\r\nFurious lands safely on the hood of the station wagon. As the Shoveler \r\nthrows the Esquire into gear, Furious shouts...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNICE CAR!\r\n\r\nAnd our heroes streak off into the night... Casanova and the others \r\nstagger out of the demolished limo, sucking in the clean air.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(impressed by Furious)\r\n\t\tThat boy's got talent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tAnd I'm gonna nip it in the bud.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON A DARKENED ALLEY -\r\n\r\nwhere the man in the strange steel mask can be seen... watching.\r\n\r\nEXT. A BAR - LATER THAT NIGHT - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nA very typical, nondescript neighborhood place...\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE BAR - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes stand at the bar, celebrating their first victory.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tTo us!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWhatever our name is.\r\n\r\nThey toast and drink.\r\n\r\nTHE SAME - LATER\r\n\r\nThe Spleen is passed out at a table, snoring. Shoveler and Invisible \r\nBoy sit next to him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tEven his snores smell bad.\r\n\r\nRaja and Bowler sit at the bar, deep in it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tBut she's your mother. You gotta tell her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI can't.\r\n\r\nON SHOVELER AND INVISIBLE BOY\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tDad thinks all this superhero stuff is a stupid \r\n\t\twaste of time.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tBut he plays golf, right?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\nBACK ON RAJA AND BOWLER -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI'm her only son, and she always had such high \r\n\t\thopes for me. Medicine. Law.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tBut you're a superhero.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThe cape. The turban. She wouldn't \r\n\t\tunderstand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI know... My girlfriends all dumped me after I \r\n\t\tput on the mask. They thought I'd lost it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut in fact... you'd found it.\r\n\r\nThey clink their glasses and drink.\r\n\r\nBACK ON SHOVELER AND INVISIBLE BOY -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThis is your dream... and you can't ever give \r\n\t\tit up.\r\n\r\nThe Spleen makes weird noises in his sleep.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tI wonder what he dreams about?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWe don't want to know.\r\n\r\nMr. Furious sits alone in the corner, brooding, lost in his own angry \r\nthoughts..\r\n\r\nOUTSIDE THE BAR - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nA black van drives slowly past the bar.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE VAN - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe van is packed with Disco Boys. Tony P sits in the front seat.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tThere.\r\n\r\nHIS POV -\r\n\r\nHe has spotted the Ford Esquire parked in the lot.\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE BAR - A LITTLE LATER\r\n\r\nON THE BOWLER AND RAJA -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tIt's late. I'm headin' home.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMe, too.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\t\t\t(to Invisible Boy)\r\n\t\tCome on, Junior, it's a school night.\r\n\r\nJUST OUTSIDE - A MONENT LATER\r\n\r\nAs our heroes, carrying the Spleen, leave.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAnybody up for a little White Castle?\r\n\r\nBut suddenly the world is a whirling sass of chains and clubs as they \r\nare bushwhacked by the Disco Boys...\r\n\r\nEXT. AN ALLEY - A LITTLE LATER - CLOSE ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nas he comes to with a qroan and sees... the Bowler and Invisible Boy \r\ntied up and gagged, with the Raja, Shoveler, and the Spleen trussed up \r\nright next to them. Furious looks up, sees Tony P standing over him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tHi, cutie.\r\n\r\nFurious struggles, but he has been secured with some very heavy tire \r\nchains. Tony P takes out a large caliber revolver, flips it open to \r\nmake sure it's loaded.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tSix losers. Six bullets. Perfect... Got any \r\n\t\tlast words, Angry Boy?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tDisco sucks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tDisco sucks. Very good. You know what I'm \r\n\t\tgonna do, Angry Boy, since you're so colorful? \r\n\t\tI'm gonna save you for last.\r\n\r\nHe turns and points the pistol right at Invisible Boy's head. Furious \r\nstruggles against his chains--to no avail.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tSweet dreams, punk.\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy closes his eyes... Tony P cocks the pistol... But \r\nsuddenly, there is the ring of steel--a broad blade sweeps through the \r\nair, and Tony P's pistol is sliced neatly in half.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\t\t\t(holding half a pistol)\r\n\t\tHOLY...\r\n\r\nThe man is the strange steel mask is standing there, the drawn machete \r\nstill in his hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMAN IN MASK\r\n\t\tBuenos naches.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tGet him!\r\n\r\nThe Disco Boys rush the newcomer, but he slices through their baseball \r\nbats with his machete, and sends them reeling and crashing into each \r\nother with expert forearm blows, whacks with the flat of his blade, and \r\nhead butts with his mask.\r\n\r\nFurious struggles to break free and join the fight, but the chains are \r\ntoo strong... and the stranger doesn't need any help.\r\n\r\nTony P flicks open a big switchblade and lunges at the stranger, who \r\nsidesteps him like a matador and swings his machete at him. Tony P \r\nturns, about to charge again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMAN IN MASK\r\n\t\t\t\t (Mexican accent)\r\n\t\tWould you like me to trim the sides?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\nTony P feels the top of his head, and realizes that the blow from the \r\nmachete has neatly sliced off the top his disco-do, leaving only \r\nstubble on the top of his head.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\t\t \t (freaking out)\r\n\t\tLET'S GET OUTTA HERE!\r\n\r\nTony and the Disco Boys run for it...\r\n\r\nFurious and the others study their masked savior, who stands before \r\nthem, machete in hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tYou're the Sphinx.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tAnd you are a fool.\r\n\r\nHe raises his machete above Furious' head... and then slices clean \r\nthrough the chains.\r\n\r\nEXT.\tAUTO DEMOLITION YARD - LATER THAT NIGHT\r\n\r\nOur heroes have gathered around a scrap wood fire in a steel drum. They \r\nsit on the ground and on old car seats, feeling like schmucks as the \r\nSphinx chews theu out, his mask looking very friqhtening and magical in \r\nthe flickering light.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tYou call yourselves superheroes? A rooster \r\n\t\tfights more intelligently than you! You have \r\n\t\tshown yourself to your enemy and revealed your \r\n\t\tpowers to him--and what have you accouplished \r\n\t\tfor this? You have destroyed his car. \r\n\t\tBrilliant! If you want to survive you must \r\n\t\tfight like a wolf pack--not like a six pack!\r\n\r\nFurious sulks, but the others get the point.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tThe wolf is cunning. He knows that stealth is \r\n\t\this greatest weapon, and he always fights as a \r\n\t\tteam...\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(more)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tSPHINX (Cont'd)\r\n\t\t\t\t(at Furious)\r\n\t\tNot like some drunken Tejano on Saturday night.\r\n\r\nFurious grunts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tCasanova Frankenstein is a a master of evil. \r\n\t\tYou will need more than shovels and dessert \r\n\t\tforks to stop him... What else have you got?\r\n\r\nThey are silent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (angrily)\r\n\t\tSo what else has Superman got?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHe's got the fact that he's Superman!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tBullets bounce off him!\r\n\r\nFurious sulks again, feeling that the others are turning against him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tFirepower costs money.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tAnybody got any?\r\n\r\nA silence.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWe didn't think this through very well.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\t\t\t(after a moment)\r\n\t\tMy father had this friend... He was an inventor...\r\n\r\nEXT. DOC HELLER'S FARMHOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nOur heroes stand looking at an old farubouse. The place is an absolute \r\nwreck. It hasn't been painted in twenty-five years. Windows are \r\nboarded up. Half the shingles are gone. There's visible fire damage \r\naround the kitchen window.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAre you sure he's still lives here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tAre you sure he's still alive?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHe was the last time I saw him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWhen was that?\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tI was eight.\r\n\r\nShe is about to knock, but the door is suddenly yanked open, and an \r\neighty year old guy is standing there. He's got a wild head of white \r\nhair (that looks like a living explosion), and he wears a stained old \r\nlab coat with stickum mtssages to himself stuck to it, non-matching \r\nslippers, and a pair of thick glasses with frames that have been \r\ncomposited of half a dozen different old pairs all taped and welded \r\ntogether into a fantastic concoction. He is DOC HELLER.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tYes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tDoctor Heller?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\t\t\t(doesn't recognize her)\r\n\t\tYes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tIt's me... Elizabeth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tElizabeth! Little Elizabeth! Why you're so... \r\n\t\tmiddle aged!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThanks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tHow's your dad?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHe's dead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tOh that's right--they squished him... Heck of \r\n\t\ta guy.\r\n\r\nFurious throws a look at the Shoveler and Raja. This guy's out of it. \r\nThey're wasting their time.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tDoc, these are my friends. We're superheroes, \r\n\t\tand we need your help.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tWell, I give to the United Way, and I feel that \r\n\t\tsort of covers--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tDoctor, we need your weapons.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\t\t\t (ecstatic)\r\n\t\tMy weapons? You need my weapons?\r\n\r\nEXT. BEHIND THE HOUSE - A MINUTE LATER - MOVING ANGLE\r\n\r\nas Doctor Heller leads them all briskly across his overgrown yard \r\ntoward... the barn.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tThe military establishment has never understood \r\n\t\tme. They won't return my phone calls, much \r\n\t\tless field test anything. But I knew that \r\n\t\tsomeday I'd get my chance, and now... here you \r\n\t\tare!\r\n\t\t\t (pulls open the barn door)\r\n\r\nINT. THE BARN - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nAs our heroes step into Heller's laboratory/arsenal. A stack of small \r\naluminum cans lines one wall. There are weird lookinq sprayers, tubes, \r\nand strange homemade toy-like devices... but there isn't a firearm in \r\nsight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut, Doc... where's the machine guns?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThe bazookas?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tThe lasers?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tYou don't need that junk! You see, for \r\n\t\tthousands of years mankind has been immolating, \r\n\t\tdisemboweling, and exploding itself. Why? \r\n\t\tBecause we have this built-in screwed up need \r\n\t\tto go to war!\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(more)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER (Cont'd)\r\n\t\tSo as a young man I thought, why nat have the \r\n\t\tfun and excitement of war, without all that \r\n\t\tunnecessary bloodshed. That's why I have \r\n\t\tdevoted my life to developing an arsenal of \r\n\t\thighly sophisticated non-lethal military \r\n\t\tweapons.\r\n\t\t\t\t(points to a hand held tube)\r\n\t\tAir cannons... Blame throwers... Feet seeking \r\n\t\tmissiles... And perhaps my ultimate \r\n\t\tinvention...\r\n\t \t\t (picks up one of the small cans)\r\n\t\tThe canned tornado.\r\n\r\nFurious groans, and the others share a look. This guy's really a nut.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tNow here's a beauty!\r\n\t\t\t(picks up a purple and orange sprayer\r\n\t\t\tthat looks like a suped up water gun)\r\n\t\tI call it the Shrinker! I developed it after \r\n\t\tyears of studying the worst dry cleaners I \r\n\t\tcould find. It instantly shrinks fabrics to \r\n\t\thalf their size. Anyone caught in its spray is \r\n\t\timmediately immobilized by their own clothing!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tLet's get out of here.\r\n\r\nFurious turns and goes out, and the others start to follow. But the \r\nBowler picks up a canned tornado.\r\n\r\nOUTSIDE THE BARN - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas Furious walks away, the Bowler steps out of the barn.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHey, Mister Bad Mood.\r\n\r\nFurious stops, turns back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\t\t(pulls the ring on the can)\r\n\t\tCatch.\r\n\r\nShe tosses the can to him. He catches it--just as a small angry \r\ntornado FUNNELS out of the can. It catches Furious and lifts him high \r\nin the air... then dissipates to nothing...\r\n\r\nA beat later Furious lands on the ground with a painful thump.\r\n\r\nON THE OTHERS, amazed.\r\n\r\nFurious gets to his feet, unhurt, but really pissed off. He starts \r\nback toward the barn, violently kicking the empty can. The others get \r\nout of his way, as, muttering angrily to himself, he goes back into the \r\nbarn...\r\n\r\nAnd emerges a moment later, toting the air cannon.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tHe's got the air cannon!\r\n\r\nThe others think he's going to use it on them and scatter for cover. \r\nbut Furious steps out into the yard, looking for a suitable target... \r\nHe sees an old abandoned outhouse, puts the air cannon to his shoulder, \r\naims, and fires...\r\n\r\nThere is a loud WHOOOOMPH of compressed air, and the huge recoil of the \r\ncannon instantly flings Furious back against the wall of the barn. But \r\nthe big rush of air hits the shed dead center... and BLOWS IT TO \r\nPIECES, leaving only the old seat.\r\n\r\nFurious gets up, dusts himself off, and moves to Doc Heller.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tDoc, you're a genius!\r\n\t\t\t\t (hugs him)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tI know.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(turns to the others)\r\n\t\tOkay! We got the firepower! I say we throw it \r\n\t\tinto the car, drive over to Casanova's house, \r\n\t\tand kick some ass!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tNo.\r\n\r\nThe others ignore Furious and listen to the Sphinx.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tWe are not yet ready. Now we must learn to \r\n\t\tfight together... as one thing.\r\n\r\nThe others nod in agreemnt... while Furious fumes.\r\n\r\nMONTAGE WITH MUSIC - TRAINING AT THE FARM\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON DOC HELLER aiming his air cannon... CAMERA PULLS BACK TO \r\nREVEAL our heroes (minus Furious) standing in a pack right behind him, \r\nholding him down. HE fires, and the recoil jolts them all violently, \r\nbut it doesn't knock them over...\r\n\r\nas half a dozen scarecrows are blown to pieces... Our heroes chieer and \r\nshake their fists... while Mr. Furious sits alone on the sidelines, \r\ndrinking bourbon, and feeling very alienated.\r\n\r\nVARIOUS SHOTS as our heroes learn to fight as a team... crawling across \r\nthe grass together....charginq in a line... hurling canned tornadoes... \r\nwhile Furious sits it out, brooding, drinking, and getting very jealous \r\nof the Sphinx.\r\n\r\nShoveler, Bowler, and the Sphinx stand shoulder to shoulder, as \r\nInvisible Boy, Spleen, Raja, and the Doc throw small stones at them... \r\nThey deflect the pebbles with shovel, bowling ball, and machete... \r\nTheyre having fun. They're becoming a team...\r\n\r\nEXT. OUTSIDE THE BARN - EVENING\r\n\r\nFurious drinks alone, while the rest of our heroes sit around an old \r\npicnic table, feasting on sodas and pizza (like a football team after a \r\ngreat practice.) Raja explains the history of the situation to the \r\nSphinx.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tTwenty years ago all the major hoodlums of this \r\n\t\tcity were united into one great brotherhood of \r\n\t\tevil, and Casanova was their king.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tCrime was rampant. It wasn't safe to stay in \r\n\t\tyour home.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tMuch less go outside.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThen Captain Amazing appeared.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tHe busted Casanova and sent the crooks packing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAnd this has been a pretty nice place to live \r\n\t\tever since.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (pissed off)\r\n\t\tBut now Casanova's back! And we're gonna sit \r\n\t\taround here all night eating pizza and telling \r\n\t\tstories! Hey, lets toast some marshmellows!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tThe wise snake coils before he strikes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(lunges at the Sphinx)\r\n\t\tAnd a skunk stinks!\r\n\r\nFurious and the Sphinx square off, their faces only inches apart.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tYou drink too much.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhen are you going to take off that mask?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\t\t\t (pointedly)\r\n\t\tWhen I am sure I am among friends.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tRoy--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(snapping at him)\r\n\t\tGo dance with your mother, Jeffrey!\r\n\r\nON THE RAJA, hurt.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tYour rage is a very great power, but it blinds \r\n\t\tyou to your heart.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMy heart died a long time ago.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tIt is not dead. It is hiding.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tBlow it out your bean hole, Pancho!... And to \r\n\t\thell with the rest of you!... Look at you. \r\n\t\tBunch of rejects. I didn't need you before--\r\n\t\tand I don't need you now!\r\n\t\t\t(jumps on to his motorcycle)\r\n\t\tThe great ones RIDE ALONE!\r\n\t\t\t(kicks the engine started)\r\n\t\tAdios, muchachos!\r\n\t\t\t(and he rides off across the field)\r\n\r\nON THE OTHERS, watching him...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHas he always been like this?\r\n\r\nEXT. COUNTRY ROAD - CONTINUOUS - CLOSE ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nthe wind whipping against his face, as he rides his Harley at about a \r\nhundred miles an hour... The languorous sound of an OLD DEAN MARTIN \r\nSONG is heard as we...\r\n\r\nFADE INTO:\r\n\r\nMENORY SEQUENCE - DAY - CLOSE ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nas a little boy, sitting in the backseat of the family car. It is \r\nthirty years ago, and Mister Furious is a sweet, very shy, well \r\nbehaved, perfectly normal three year old. His MOTHER and FATHER sit in \r\nthe front. Dean Martin is playing on the car radio. Little Furious \r\nlooks out the window and sees the Mohave Desert going by. A sign reads \r\n\"Las Vegas, 120 miles\".\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\t\t\t (to husband)\r\n\t\tOh this place looks great.\r\n\r\nAn old sign reads \"BAR\" as the family car pulls into the parking lot of \r\na single adobe building out in the middle of nowhere. They park.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tNow honey, you just wait in the car. Mommy and \r\n\t\tDaddy will be right beck.\r\n\r\nThey get out, lock the car and head for the bar, leaving the windows \r\nup. Little Furious watches them go, never suspecting that his entire \r\nlife is about to change. He sits quietly in the backseat and plays \r\nwith the little superhero figurines that he's brought with him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLITTLE FURIOUS\r\n\t\tPow! Bang! Wham!\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE BAR - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas the parents enter. A very Western motif. An old Gene Autrey song \r\nis playing on the juke. The air conditioning is on.\tThey're the only \r\ncustomers in the place.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tIt's nice and cool in here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFATHER\r\n\t\t\t\t(as they sit at the bar)\r\n\t\tBarkeep, a couple of cold ones.\r\n\r\nCUT BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN CAR AND BAR -\r\n\r\nANGLE ON THE MIDDAY SON - blazing down on the car...\r\n\r\nas Little Furious still plays with his superheroes, but the interior is \r\nstarting to bake, and the sweat begins to pour ofr him. He looks out \r\nat the bar. gettinq worried. He tries the windows, but they're \r\nautomatic and won't open...\r\n\r\nBack in the bar his parents down shots of bourbon with their beers, as \r\nthe BARTENDER finishes telling them a joke.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBARTENDER\r\n\t\tAnd here's a banana for your monkey.\r\n\r\nMom and Dad have a good laugh.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBARTENDER\r\n\t\tCouple more?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFATHER\r\n\t\tYou bet.\r\n\r\nANGLE FROM OUTSIDE TUE CAR as Little Furious, sweat and tears pouring \r\nout of him, his hair wet and sticking out (and starting to take on that \r\nfamiliar look), pounds on the window.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLITTLE FURIOUS\r\n\t\tMommy! Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!\r\n\r\nas back in the bar his parents, now very drunk, down more beers and \r\nchasers as they play a spirited game of pinball.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON THE MOHAVE SUN - beating down mercilessly\r\n\r\nbarely able to breath, Little Furious flops back onto the seat, his \r\nface a mask of heat and terror... But suddenly, a change begins to take \r\nplace in him, as some primordial defense mechanism kicks in... and his \r\nfear begins to give way to rage... His teeth bare.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON HIS HANDS -\r\n\r\nas they CRUSH the superhero figurines in their grasp...\r\n\r\nWhile back in the bar his drunken parents dance a slow two step to Hank \r\nWilliams \"Your Cheatin' Heart\"...\r\n\r\nEXT. TBE PARKING LOT - NIGHT - HANK WILLIAMS CONTINUES\r\n\r\nas the big desert moon shines down on the family car, still parked \r\nthere.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE BAR - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe parents are asleep in a booth. Furious' mother wakes up, looks \r\naround groggily, and in a moment of horror suddenly remembers...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tOH MY GOD!\r\n\r\nTHE PARKING LOT - A BEAT LATER\r\n\r\nas she runs toward the car, hysterical.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tOh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!\r\n\r\nShe unlocks the door, throws it open, and sees something that makes her \r\npull back in horror... Little Furious sits in the backseat. His hair \r\nsticks out wildly, his face has become that now familiar mask of \r\nprisordial rage. Another OLD DEAN MARTIN SONG is heard as we...\r\n\r\nFADE INTO:\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - NIGHT - CLOSE ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nsitting alone in the booth, a look of profound pain and lonliness on \r\nhis face; he is still that little boy. The Dean Martin song is playing \r\non the juke.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA (0.S.)\r\n\t\tHi.\r\n\r\nHe looks up and sees Monica.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHi.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tAlone tonight?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tEvery night.\r\n\r\nShe smiles.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE FRANKENSTEIN MANSION - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nArmed Disco Boys guard the front entrance...\r\n\r\nWhile on the hillside above Invisible Boy (looking through binoculars) \r\nand the Spleen lie together on their bellies in the weeds, keeping the \r\nmansion under surveillance.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\t\t\t (in a whisper)\r\n\t\tAdolescence was the worst--The other kids made \r\n\t\tfun of me, so I'd spit on them and they'd \r\n\t\tscatter--I've never had a girlfriend--unless \r\n\t\tyou count that night with my cousin--She \r\n\t\trecovered fully though--We exchange cards every \r\n\t\tChristmas--Well, I send her one, and she sends \r\n\t\tit back...\r\n\t\t\t(spritzes somathing into his mouth,\r\n\t\t\tthen offers it to Invisible Boy)\r\n\t\tBug repellent?\r\n\r\nSuddenly, the gates of the mansion open and several sedans... followed \r\nby a truck, drive out...\r\n\r\nPOV THROUGH BINOCULARS -\r\n\r\nCasanova and Anabel sit in the front of the truck.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY (0.S.)\r\n\t\tWhere are they going?\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy hesitates for just a momnt, then gets up and runs down \r\nthe hill.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\t\t\t(runs after him)\r\n\t\tKid!\r\n\r\nAs the small convoy drives past, Invisible Boy slips out from behind \r\nsome trees, runs after the truck, jumps up and sits on its rear bumper. \r\nThe Spleen comes running after him, and Invisible Boy reaches out, \r\ngrabs his hand and pulls him up alongside him. Invisible Boy tries the \r\nrear gate. It's open. The two of them pull it up just a foot, squirm \r\ninside, then pull it closed behind them.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE TRUCK - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy flashes the light of his key chain flashlight around the \r\ninside of the truck. There is nothing in it, except for a large pile \r\nof packing blankets.\r\n\r\nEXT. WATERFRONT AREA - NIGHT\r\n\r\nas the convoy drives through Champion City's seedy waterfront area and \r\nout onto a long pier.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - NIGHT - CLOSE ON THE TV\r\n\r\nDawn Wong and Don Stouffer report the night's news.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDAWN\r\n\t\t...still no sign of millionaire Lance Hunt, and \r\n\t\tnow, in an unrelated story, another one of \r\n\t\tChampion City's leading citizens has apparently \r\n\t\tdisappeared. Captain Amazing has not been seen \r\n\t\tor heard from in a week. Authorities believe \r\n\t\tthat the hard working superhero may just be \r\n\t\ttaking a well deserved rest.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDON\r\n\t\tCancun perhaps?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDAWN\r\n\t\tSounds good to me, Don.\r\n\r\nMr. Furious sits in the booth drinking coffee as Monica serves him his \r\nburger and fries.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (floundering)\r\n\t\tMonica... I was wondering if--uh-maybe we--I \r\n\t\tmean you and I--could-uh--you know--get a--I \r\n\t\tmean have a...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tDate?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI get off work in fifteen minutes. Walk me \r\n\t\thome?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSure.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tThat was easy.\r\n\t\t\t\t(goes back to work)\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS, feeling a whole lot better.\r\n\r\nJUST OUTSIDE THE DINER - CONTINUOUS - UNKNOWN POV\r\n\r\nfrom across the street. Furious' head is clearly visible in the \r\nbrightly illuminated window of the diner.\r\n\r\nA Disco Boy stands in the shadows, gazing at the diner; he recognizes \r\nFurious.\r\n\r\nEXT. WATERFRONT - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe convoy has pulled up alongside a rusty old freighter, docked at the \r\npier.\r\n\r\nCasanova's men throw the gate of the truck open, and the CAMERA MOVES \r\nIN. No one is there, but we notice... two large lumps under the \r\npacking blankets.\r\n\r\nCasanova holds Anabel in his arms as they watch a large wooden crate \r\nbeing lowered from the deck of the freighter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tHoney, our ship's come in.\r\n\r\nCasanova's cellular phone rings.\r\n\r\nOUTSIDE THE DINER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Disco Boy is on his phone. His pistol is drawn, and he's got it \r\naimed right at Furious' head.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDISCO BOY\r\n\t\tJust give me the word.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE PIER - CONTINUOUS - ON CASANOVA\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t (gets an idea)\r\n\t\tWait. I'll be right there.\r\n\t\t\t\t(hangs up, starts off)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\t\t\t (peeved)\r\n\t\tWhere are you going?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tHead hunting.\r\n\r\nA minute later Casanova and two or three Disco Boys drive off in one of \r\nthe sedans... as the crate is loaded onto the truck, and the gate is \r\npulled closed... and locked.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE TRUCK - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nThe engine starts up, and the truck starts to move, as Invisible Soy \r\nand the Spleen poke their heads out from under the packing blankets... \r\nThey approach the crate and Invisible Boy shines his flashlight on it. \r\nThe crate is secured with rivets and thick metal bands; there's no way \r\nthey're going to be able to get inside it, but in the light of the \r\nflashlight they see...\r\n\r\nFaded red lettering, in Russian, and the distinctive old hammer and \r\nsickle of the former Soviet Union.\r\n\r\nEXT. DIMLY LIT STREET - NIGHT\r\n\r\nFurious walks Monica home.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI admire you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhy?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tBeing a superhero, wanting to save the world. \r\n\t\tIt's so... unselfish.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIt is?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tMost people just want to make money or be \r\n\t\tfamous or something. But you risk everything, \r\n\t\tjust to help people.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(after a moment)\r\n\t\tI wouldn't mind being famous.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWho wouldn't?\r\n\r\nIn the shadows behind them... Casanova follows, stalking them, as \r\nsilent as a vampire.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI've never been able to figure out what to do \r\n\t\twith my life, which is why I guess I'm still a \r\n\t\twaitress.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNothing wrong with being a waitress.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWhat's your real name?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tRoy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tHave you always lived here?\r\n\r\nHe nods.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tMe too... I love this stupid old town. It's \r\n\t\tnoisy. It's smelly. It's falling apart.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIt's home.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tYeah.\r\n\r\nCASANOVA'S POV\r\n\r\nMonica, smiling, looking lovely.\r\n\r\nCLOSE 0N CASANOVA; he wants her...\r\n\r\nBACK ON FURIOUS AND MONICA -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI've thought of leaving, going to Chicago or \r\n\t\tNew York, but...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhat have they got that we ain't got?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tChampion's going to bounce back, and I want to \r\n\t\tbe here when it does.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMe, too.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tYou don't seem very angry right now.\r\n\r\nHe shrugs. And they kiss, very tenderly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tYou know what? Underneath all that anger I \r\n\t\tthink there's just a little boy who wants \r\n\t\teveryone to love him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI just want to be a superhero.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tThat's what I mean... 'Night, Roy.\r\n\r\nShe turns and climbs the stairs of an old apartmnt building and goes \r\ninside, as Furious watches, feeling emotions hees not used to. He \r\nreally likes her. He starts walking back down the street, past a man \r\nsitting on the stoop. The man looks up. It's Casanova Frankenstein.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tGoing my way?\r\n\r\nFurious is caught completely by surprise--he takes a stand, ready to \r\nfight.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTake it easy--take it easy. I just want to \r\n\t\thave a little chat... That was quite a number \r\n\t\tyou did on my car. You've got a lot of \r\n\t\tviolence in you... and I like that in a guy.\r\n\r\nFurious, silent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tYou know what the difference is between good \r\n\t\tand evil, Roy?\r\n\r\nFurious reacts to the fact that Casanova knows his real name.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tEvil is more fun. When you want something, you \r\n\t\tjust take it, and if somebody gets in your way, \r\n\t\tyou kill them... You seem like a very \r\n\t\tfrustrated guy, Roy. Unhappy. Unfulfilled. \r\n\t\tWhat is it that you've always wanted, always \r\n\t\tdesired? Because whatever it is, I can give it \r\n\t\tto you... Fame?\r\n\t\t\t\t(snaps his fingers)\r\n\t\tEasy. Fortune? Even easier. Women?\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(laughs)\r\n\t\tThe easiest of all.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON FURIOUS as, out of the corner of his eye, he catches movement \r\nin the alley across the street... he knows what it is.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI'll let you in on a little secret, Roy. In \r\n\t\ttwo days this entire city will belong to me, \r\n\t\tand there's not a damn thing your little pals \r\n\t\tcan do about it. It's the perfect time to \r\n\t\tswitch teams... So what do you say?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (quietly)\r\n\t\tYou're nuts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(flairs)\r\n\t\tThey always call the great ones nuts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAnd the nuts always call themselves great.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(his psychosis showing)\r\n\t\tAre you with me... or against me?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAgainst.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tToo bad. PLUG HIM!\r\n\r\nGunfire rings out from the alley as the Disco Bays step out, their \r\npistols blazing. But Furious has anticipated them. He leaps right at \r\nCasanova, pins his arms in a bear hug and holds him in the line of \r\nfire.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWAIT!\r\n\r\nThe Disco BQys stop firing... Furious drags Casanova back into an empty \r\nlot, using him as a shield.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (to Casanova)\r\n\t\tThanks for reminding me which team I'm on.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tYou're dead.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSo are you!\r\n\r\nFurious releases Casanova, then runs for it and leaps over the wooden \r\nwall at the end of the lot... as the Disco Boys open fire again, and \r\ntheir bullets punch holes through the wall...\r\n\r\nFurious runs down a back street and escapes into the night.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE FRANKENSTEIN CENTER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe convoy drives up the hill toward an ominous looking structure (that \r\nwe recognize from the model on the TV interview with Casanova earlier.) \r\nA high central tower rises up out of the half completed bulwarks of \r\nfeatureless concrete. It looks both totally modern and completely \r\nancient, but a profound sense of evil connects both themes beautifully.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON a plaque that reads... \"Frankenstein Center for the \r\nPerforming and Non-performing Arts\".\r\n\r\nThe gates of the center open, and the convoy passes through.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE TRUCK - A NONENT LATER\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy and the Spleen stand listening, waiting, as they feel the \r\ntruck pull to a stop...\r\n\r\nA moment later the gate is pulled opened... Anabel is there with \r\nseveral thuggy looking SECURITY GUARDS.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tBe careful with my baby.\r\n\r\nThere are two lumps under the packing blankets again.\r\n\r\nEXT. LOADING DOCK - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\nThe crate is being carried away by a forklift... A beat, and then \r\nInvisible Boy and the Spleen slip out of the empty truck...\r\n\r\nAnd run down the road back toward the gates... which are still open. \r\nThey're just about to pass safely through them, when a PAIR OF ARMED \r\nSECURITY GUARDS, step in their path, their guns pointed at thern.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 1\r\n\t\tFreeze!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 2\r\n\t\tHands up!\r\n\r\nThey freeze, their hands held high.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 2\r\n\t\tWhat are you two doing here?\r\n\r\nOur heroes are mute.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 1\r\n\t\tNot talking, eh? That can be fixed. Turn \r\n\t\taround, start walking up the hill--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 2\r\n\t\tAnd no funny business.\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy and the Spleen turn, hands in the air, and start up the \r\nhill, the guards right behind them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\t\t(after a moment, to Invisible\r\n\t\t\t\tBoy, in a whisper)\r\n\t\tPinch 'em.\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy pinches his nostrils--and the Spleen lets out with a \r\nhorrendous fart. The guards gag and choke violently in the fumes as \r\nour heroes turn and run for it... escaping out the gates.\r\n\r\nINT. DOC KELLER'S LABORATORY/BARN - A LITTLE LATER\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy and Spleen report to the others.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tWhatever was in that crate... is from Russia.\r\n\r\nThe others consider this, then hear a familiar voice.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS (0.S.)\r\n\t\tIs there room in the pack for one more wolf?\r\n\r\nThey look up and see that Furious has just returned... The Sphinx moves \r\nto him. For a moment they stand face to face...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI was wrong... I need my friends.\r\n\r\nSphinx takes off his mask, revealing that he is the busboy from the \r\nTacky Taco.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tAmigo.\r\n\r\nThey embrace.\r\n\r\nA few mimutes later. The others are gathered around Furious, listening \r\nto his story.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tCasanova said that in two days the entire city \r\n\t\twould belong to him... and there wasn't a thing \r\n\t\tthat we could do about it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tWhat did he mean?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI dunno.\r\n\r\nThrough the window the moon is seen rising over the hillside, the \r\nFrankenstein Center silhouetted ominously against it. Raja, Shoveler, \r\nand Furious gaze at it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tMaybe it's time we checked that place out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut how do we get in?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t(after a moment, sounding very Sphinx-like)\r\n\t\tWe just become like the wolf... who wears the \r\n\t\tsheep's clothing.\r\n\r\nMONTAGE WITH MUSIC - THE NEXT DAY\r\n\r\nCLASSIC DISCO (\"Stayin' Alive\" if we can get the rights)\r\n\r\nFurious, Raja, and Shoveler (in street clothes) walk down the street \r\ntogether and step into the doorway of... the Salvation Army Thrift \r\nShop...\r\n\r\nLater. CLOSE ON three pairs of legs, wearing polyester pants and \r\nvintage shoes (ala the classic shot from \"Saturday Night Fever\")... \r\nCAMERA WIDENS TO REVEAL our three heroes, dressed in full blown \r\nseventies attire (with vintage sunglasses), doing their best Travolta \r\nstrut down the street...\r\n\r\nMUSIC CONTINUES as our heroes strut their way through the gates of the \r\nart center, right past the security guards...\r\n\r\nOUTSIDE THE CENTER - DAY\r\n\r\nThey climb the long stairs toward the center, which looms above them... \r\nthen pass through the big wooden doors and into...\r\n\r\nINT. MAIN HALL - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nEND MUSIC as our heroes move through a vast, but empty main hall... A \r\nsmall army of heavily armed security guards marches about.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tSo where's the art?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHe hasn't stolen it yet.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThis place is built like a fortress.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tBecause thats what it is.\r\n\r\nThey hear a WILD BURST OF DRUNKEN LAUGHTER echoing through the hall.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWhat's that?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t(following the sound)\r\n\t\tCome on.\r\n\r\nThey approach a doorway. The noise is coming from within.\r\n\r\nINT. BANQUET IIALL - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nas our heroes step inside and see... A big luncheon is in progress. \r\nCasanova, Anabel, and Tony P sit at the head table. The room is lined \r\nwith banquet tables, which are filled with VICIOUS LOOKING CHARACTERS, \r\ndrunk, eating, laughing, and giving the waitresses a very rough tim..\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t (stunned)\r\n\t\tOh my God... Every crook in the city is here.\r\n\r\nON A GROUP OF VICIOUS LOOKING BALD BIKER TYPES...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThe Bone Heads from the South Side...\r\n\r\nON THREE INSIPIDLY EVIL LOOKING GUYS in hip suits...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThe Bland Boys from Downtown...\r\n\r\nON A DARK HAIRED WHITE GUY dressed as a rapper...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (O.S.)\r\n\t\tItalian Ice...\r\n\r\nON A GUY with a frightening assortment of metal things piercing his \r\nface...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (O.S.)\r\n\t\tThe Stapler...\r\n\r\nON TWO THUGS DRESSED AS ELVIS...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (0.S.)\r\n\t\tThe Elvis Brothers.\r\n\r\nA more degenerate group of criminals never sat down to lunch. Furious \r\nrecognizes one of the waitresses... It's Monica.\r\n\r\nCasanova's got his eye on her, too, and he remembers her from the night \r\nbefore on the street with Furious.\r\n\r\nON ANABEL, noticing his interest.\r\n\r\nOur heroes see Monica walking straight toward them. They turn away, \r\nlean against a wail, trying to be totally inconspicuous...\r\n\r\nBut as she passes them, not noticing them... Casanova approaches her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tExcuse me.\r\n\r\nShe stops, turns to him, while our heroes listen in, only a few feet \r\naway...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t(reading her name tag)\r\n\t\tMonica... Beautiful name. It suits you.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON FURIOUS, getting jealous.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI hope you won't take this the wrong way, but I \r\n\t\tcouldn't help but notice... that you're a dead \r\n\t\tringer for Veronica Lake in \"The Blue Dahlia\".\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tReally?\r\n\r\nFurious growls. Raja gives him an elbow.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tAre you an actress?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tJust a waitress.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tYou underestimate yourself.\r\n\r\nMister Furious is fuming. The strands of his perfectly coiffed disco-\r\ndo start to stand straight up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tYou know I'm writing a play--it's just a little \r\n\t\tBroadway thing, but thure's a part in it that I \r\n\t\tthink you'd be perfect for.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tReally?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI'd love to hear you read it. Could you stick \r\n\t\taround after the luncheon?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tSure--I guess.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTerrific.\r\n\r\nShe turns and walks into the kitchen.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON CASANOVA, watching her; his intentions are sinister... He \r\nturns and sees... our heroes, hanging by the wall.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWhat are you three doing here? This is invited \r\n\t\tguests only. Out.\r\n\r\nOur heroes skulk out.\r\n\r\nJUST OUTSIDE THE BANQUET HALL - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas our heroes step out and breathe a sigh of relief.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tThat was too close.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tBut we gotta find out what's going on in there.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHey.\r\n\r\nFurious has spotted... a large covered dessert table, waiting to be \r\nwheeled into the hall.\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE BANQUET HALL - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\nas the dessert table is wheeled in... and in a CLOSER ANGLE, under the \r\ntable cloth, we see three pairs of disco shoes creeping along...\r\n\r\nA few minutes later, Monica steps up to the dessert table... Suddenly, \r\nshe is yanked under.\r\n\r\nUNDER THE TABLE - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nMonica struggles, tries to cry out, but a hand is clamped firmly over \r\nher mouth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIt's me.\r\n\r\nShe calms down, and he takes his hand off her mouth.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWhat are you guys doing here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t RAJA & SHOVELER\r\n\t\tShhhh!\r\n\r\nThe waitresses leave; the big doors to the dining room are swung \r\nclosed, and the cigars are lit. The meeting has begun. Casanova takes \r\nthe podium.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThank you all for coming. I hope you enjoy the \r\n\t\tcigars. I had to kill a dozen Cubans to get \r\n\t\tthem.\r\n\r\nTony P chuckles loudly, but the joke goes over like a lead balloon with \r\nthe rest of the crowd.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTwenty years ago, this town was yours! AND I \r\n\t\tWAS YOUR KING!\r\n\r\nON THE HOODS, listening, bored, puffing on their cigars; this is a sad \r\nold story.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t (tragically)\r\n\t\tBut they called me a psycho, and they put me \r\n\t\taway. For twenty years I rotted in my cell, \r\n\t\tpainting watercolors, writing haikus--just \r\n\t\twaiting for the day I could take my revenge. \r\n\t\tWell, brothers, that day has come!\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES under the table, listening. Monica begins to realize \r\nwhat's going on.\r\n\r\nBACK TO CASANOVA -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThey thought I was crazy? Well the joke's on \r\n\t\tthem--because tonight at precisely midnight--on \r\n\t\tthe twentieth anniversary of my tragic arrest--\r\n\t\tevery man, woman, and child in this city is \r\n\t\tgoing to turn into a RAVING PSYCSOTIC! Mothers \r\n\t\twill murder their tots! Old ladies will \r\n\t\tstrangle their cats! Children will bump off \r\n\t\ttheir babysitters!\r\n\r\nThe guests think Casanova's completely lost it. Italian Ice speaks up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tITALIAN ICE\r\n\t\tYou're outta your mind!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI beg your pardon?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tITALIAN ICE\r\n\t\tNobody could drive a whole city crazy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTell you what, Ice. I'll mke you a friendly \r\n\t\tlittle wager. It I can't do it... you can blow \r\n\t\tmy brains out. If I can, I'll blow out yours.\r\n\r\nNow the hoods' interest has been perked.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tITALIAN ICE\r\n\t\tDone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t(to Anabel, with a smile)\r\n\t\tHoney, give the boys a taste.\r\n\r\nAnabel puts on a pair of heavy duty sound deadening ear protectors, \r\nthen presses a button on a small remote control device.\r\n\r\nANGLE ON A SPEAKER, placed above the podium... as the air is suddenly \r\nfilled with a weird, stridulating, HORRIFIC NOISE (somewhere between \r\nthe sound of a fire siren and a hornet trapped in your ear) and \r\neveryone in the room (except Anabel) goes COMPLETELY BERSERK...\r\n\r\nCAMERA PANS the tables as the guests laugh dementedly, punching, \r\ngouging, strangling, and stabbing each other...\r\n\r\nUnder the serving table our heroes go crazy...\r\n\r\nCasanova, in a state of psychotic ecstasy, whips out his pistol and \r\nempties it into Italian Ice... who drops to the floor, dead.\r\n\r\nAnabel presses the button again; the sound winds down and stops, and \r\neverything returns to normal. The entire event lasted only a few \r\nseconds, but the guests are dazzled.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCROOKS\r\n\t\tThat was great!... What the hell was that?... \r\n\t\tHow did you do that?\r\n\r\nCasanova throws Anabel a kiss.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tTonight, at midnight, that sound will be \r\n\t\tamplified across this entire city. Murder and \r\n\t\tmayhem will reign supreme! And Champion City \r\n\t\twill be ours again! This will be our castle! \r\n\t\tAnd I will be our king! And there's no one to \r\n\t\tstop us!\r\n\r\nSuddenly, a familiar voice is heard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING (O.S.)\r\n\t\tNot so fast, Casanova!\r\n\r\nA pair of curtains suddenly part... and Captain Amazing (looking a bit \r\nsinged) is standing there in classic superhero pose.\r\n\r\nCAMERA PANS the crooks, as their criminal ecstasy turns instantly to \r\nterror. They yank out their pistols, dive for cover under the table, \r\nthrow up their hands in surrender, etc... But Casanova just grins.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDon't worry, fellas...\r\n\t\t\t(moves to Captain Amazing, and\r\n\t\tputs his arm chummily around him)\r\n\t\tI killed him... and I've had him stuffed.\r\n\r\nCasaova reaches behind Captain Amazing's back and pulls a string (like \r\nthe ones they used to have on those old talking dolls).\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tAMAZING\r\n\t\t\t\t(in a canned voice)\r\n\t\tIsn't my butt cute in these tights?\r\n\t\t\t\t (pulls again)\r\n\t\tBlue is my color.\r\n\t\t\t\t (pulls again)\r\n\t\tOh, my abs are killing me!\r\n\r\nThe crooks are beside themselves with laughter.\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES, under the table, stunned.\r\n\r\nON THE ELVIS BROTHERS -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER I\r\n\t\tThe King is back!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER 2\r\n\t\tLong live the King!\r\n\r\nThe crooks fire their pistols exuberantly into the air, as disco music \r\nfills the air and Casanova dances, basking in their adoration...\r\n\r\nAnd our heroes slip out from under the table and make good their \r\nescape...\r\n\r\nINT. DOC HELLER'S BARN/LAB - LATER\r\n\r\nOur heroes and Monica pow-wow, sobered by what they have seen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWhat could have made such a horrible noise?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\t\t (after a moment, gravely)\r\n\t\tHe's got the Psychostridulator.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tThe what?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tTen years ago the Kremlin's top secret \r\n\t\tPsychiatric Warfare Division developed a \r\n\t\tprototype for a weapon that emitted a \r\n\t\tfluctuating alternative frequency noise that \r\n\t\tproduced a violent psychotic reaction in any \r\n\t\tmammal within hearing distance. But when the \r\n\t\told Soviet Union fell the stridulator and its \r\n\t\tbrilliant inventor, Doctor Kopov, disappeared.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThis Kopov, what happened to him?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tNot him... her.\r\n\r\nThey react to that piece of news, and then the Bowler opens up the \r\nnewspaper.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tDid she look like that?\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON A PHOTO of Anabel and Casanova, announcing their wedding \r\nengagement.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tYes.\r\n\r\nSilence; this is bad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\t\t\t (hopefully)\r\n\t\tMaybe it won't work.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIt works.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tA village in Siberia was wiped out when a \r\n\t\tcleaning woman switched it on by mistake.\r\n\r\nAnother grim silence, as they realize how desperate the situation is. \r\nFor the first time, they're really scared.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWe've got to warn the city.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHow?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNo one will believe us.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThey'll think we're just a bunch of weirdoes.\r\n\r\nCAMERA CUTS BETWEEN THEM as they look at each other--their frightened \r\nfaces, their sad, faded costuznes. Even the Sphinx looks scared.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t (after a moment, grimly)\r\n\t\tWe know what we gotta do.\r\n\r\nThey look at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWe're outnumbered twenty to one.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tIt's suicide.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMaybe. But this isn't about living or dying. \r\n\t\tIt's about good versus evil, and we're good, \r\n\t\twhether we like it or not... Maybe we look a \r\n\t\tlittle funny...\r\n\r\nON THE SPLEEN...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAnd smell a little funny. We're not \r\n\t\tbulletproof and we can't fly. But we're \r\n\t\tsuperheroes--and that means doing what's right-\r\n\t\t-even when it's impossible... This is our city-\r\n\t\t-these are our friends, our famlies--and if we \r\n\t\tdon't save them, nobody will! So I say we take \r\n\t\ta ride up that hill, blast our way in there, \r\n\t\tdestroy that Psycho-whatchamabob-- and teach \r\n\t\tthose deviants a lesson they'll never forget!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tNow you're talking.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tSounds good to me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tLet's do it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAnd we'll take a bunch of 'em with us!\r\n\r\nThey're all with him. Monica steps forward.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI just want you guys to know--I may not be a \r\n\t\tsuperhero, but I'm with you--and I want to \r\n\t\thelp!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tOh that's great... Thanks, Monica... (Etc.)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tWe could really use some coffee--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAnd some sandwiches--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tWith mustard!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\t\t(her feelings a little hurt)\r\n\t\tSure.\r\n\r\nA few minutes later, Monica serves sandwiches and coffee as our heroes \r\nplan...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBut that place is huge and we don't know where \r\n\t\tthis psycho thing is--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tOr even what it looks like.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tAnd he must have it well hidden.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWe'll just have to get lucky.\r\n\r\nON MONICA as she gets an idea. A moment later she slips a canned \r\ntornado into her purse... as the others put their arms around each \r\nother in a group huddle\\embrace.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tGo do what you gotta do. We'll meet back here \r\n\t\tat sunset... Do or die.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tDo or die.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tVictoria o morte.\r\n\r\nHEROIC MUSIC as...\r\n\r\nEXT. AUTO DEMOLITION YARD - DAY - CLOSE ANGLE ON\r\n\r\nTHE FRONT GRILL of the Herkimer Battle Jitney... as Mister Furious \r\nhooks it up to the \"Sally's Auto Demolition\" tow truck... A moment \r\nlater he drives the tow truck, towing the off the lot, as Sally steps \r\nout of her office, pissed off...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSALLY\r\n\t\tHEY!\r\n\r\nEXT. HELLER'S FARM - DAY\r\n\r\nON THE SPHINX, standing as immobile and silent as a statue... as a \r\nfalling leaf slowly flutters down in front of him... In a flash, his \r\nmachete slices through the air, and the leaf continues fluttering down, \r\nbut in two pieces...\r\n\r\nINT. LABORATORY/BARN - DAY\r\n\r\nDoc Heller fine tunes his Shrinker spray... as the Bowler sits quietly \r\nin the hayloft, studying the old dog eared photo of her father and \r\nherself as a little girl...\r\n\r\nINT. INVISIBLE BOY'S ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy stands in front of his mirror, eyes closed, concentrating \r\nfor all he's worth, trying to become invisible... He suddenly pops \r\nopens his eyes and looks at himuself in the mirror... but he's still \r\ncompletely visible. He flops onto his bed in frustration.\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - DAY\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON A TABLE full of food... Eggplant Parmesan, broccoli, chili... \r\nCAKERA PULLS BACK TO REVEAL the Spleen sitting alone in the booth, \r\nstuffing his face, gassing up for battle.\r\n\r\nINT. THE SHOVELER'S HOUSE - DAY\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler, standing in his bedroom, has just put on his freshly \r\nlaundered suit. CAMERA OPENS WIDE TO REVEAL Lucille, his wife, \r\nstanding there, holding his just polished shovel. He takes it from her, \r\nthen takes her in his arms.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tBaby, if I don't make it... find yourself... a \r\n\t\tnormal guy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLUCILLE\r\n\t\tI don't want a normal guy.\r\n\r\nAnd they kiss.\r\n\r\nA few minutes later... In the living room the Shoveler's kids lie \r\nsprawled in front of the television. The Shoveler, in battle array, \r\nsteps into the room. Be wants to say something to them, but the kids \r\ndon't even take their eyes off the TV look at him... He turns and walks \r\nout in silence.\r\n\r\nEND MUSIC...\r\n\r\nINT. THE RAJA'S DINING ROOM - DAY\r\n\r\nThe shades are drawn. The Raja, in full costume, quietly loads \r\nsilverware into the secret pockets of his cape. Suddenly, the light \r\nswitches on... It's his mother. She's caught him red handed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tJeffrey, YOU THIEF!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMother... it's not what you think!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tAnd why are you wearing that silly costume?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t (painfully)\r\n\t\tBecause... I'M A SUPERHERO!\r\n\r\nON HIS MOTHER, shocked.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOh, Mother, I'm sorry. I know how much you \r\n\t\twanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer with a \r\n\t\tfamily--but it's just not who I am!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tBut... the silverware?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI use it... to fight evil.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\t\t\t(after a moment)\r\n\t\tJeffrey... this is wonderful.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t\t (stunned)\r\n\t\tIt is?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tI always knew that you were special.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tYou did?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tEver since you were a little boy...\r\n\t\t\t(gets an idea, excited)\r\n\t\tCome with me.\r\n\r\nINT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nShe pulls down the stairway to the attic...\r\n\r\nINT. THE ATTIC - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nShe switches on the light and leads the Raja to a far corner... where \r\nshe moves a couple of old hat boxes, REVEALING an ancient leather bound \r\nbox with the word \"Excalibur\" engraved in gold on the top.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tThis is for you.\r\n\r\nThe Raja opens the box and registers astonisha~nt as he sees...\r\n\r\nA FABULOUS VICTORIAN SILVER SET packed with formidable looking servers, \r\ncake knives, ice cream forks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMOTHER\r\n\t\tYour Great Great Grandmother's wedding silver.\r\n\r\nThe Raja lifts up and handles a large heavily engraved pie server.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tBitchin'.\r\n\r\nEXT. OUTSIDE HELLER'S BARN/LAB - EVENING - CLOSE ON\r\n\r\nMister Furious, wrench in hand, covered with grease and oil, cussing to \r\nhimself as he works under the hood of the Herkimer.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tTry it again!\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy, sitting behind the wheel, tries the ignition of the \r\nHerkimer, and the old engine grinds as it turns over, but doesn't \r\ncatch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tCome on, baby... Come on, baby... I SAID COME \r\n\t\tON!\r\n\r\nMister Furious SLUGS the engine with his fist, and it sputters and \r\nbackfires into life... shaking, rattling, leaking, exploding, but \r\nrunning... Furious kisses the Herkimer... as the Bowler calls out to \r\nhim from the barn.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tMon Capitan, it's for you.\r\n\t\t\t\t(tosses him the phone)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHello?\r\n\r\nEXT. UNKNOWN LOCATION - EVENING - CLOSE ON MONICA\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\t\t(on a phone, speaking very softly)\r\n\t\tIt's me.\r\n\r\nBACK TO FURIOUS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMonica, where are you?\r\n\r\nBACK TO MONICA - WIDER ANGLE\r\n\r\nREVEALING that she is on a pay phone just outside the art center. \r\nShe's wearing make-up and a sexy little dress; she looks she's dressed \r\nfor a date. Disco Boys and security guards go about their business all \r\naround her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tAt the Frankenstein Center.\r\n\r\nCUT BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN THEM -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAre you nuts? Get out of there!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI'm going inside.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWhat are you talking about?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tListen, Casanova may be a supervillain, but \r\n\t\the's got a weakness, and I'm it. Maybe--just \r\n\t\tmaybe--I can trick him into showing me the \r\n\t\tlocation of the whatchamathing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHe's a psycho! He'll kill you!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tJust shut up and listen. Hold off the attack \r\n\t\tas long as you can. If I can discover the \r\n\t\tlocation I'll call you--\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAnd what if you get killed?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tThen at least I will have died trying, right?\r\n\r\nFurious silent, taken aback by her courage.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tRoy... We might never see each other again, so \r\n\t\tI'd better tell you now... I think you're \r\n\t\twonderful.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t(caught completely off guard)\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tBye.\r\n\t\t\t\t(and she hangs up)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMonica!\r\n\r\nINT. LOBBY OF THE FRANKENSTEIN CENTER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas Monica approaches a GUARD standing by the main door.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tCould you tell Mr. Frankenstein that Monica is \r\n\t\there?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD\r\n\t\tSure, doll.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE BARN - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nFurious stands by the Herkimer, phone still in hand. He seems \r\nspeechless, dazed. Something inside him has changed.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\t\t\t(worried about him)\r\n\t\tHey... you okay?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tSure.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE FRANKENSTEIN CENTER - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\nCasanova steps out and sees... Monica, looking very sexy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tHi.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI thought you'd chickened out on me.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tJust wanted to... powder my nose.\r\n\r\nHis eyes roam all over her; he knows she's up to something, but she \r\nlooks yummy, and this is just the sort of cat and mouse game he loves.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tHow 'bout giving me \"the tour\"?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWhy not?\r\n\r\nEXT. COURTYARD - A FEW MINUTES LATER\r\n\r\nas Casanova leads Monica across an open courtyard toward... the sheer \r\nwalls of the imposing central tower.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tBig, isn't it?\r\n\r\nHe leads her to a massive archway, the only apparent entrance to the \r\ntower. But just as she is about to pass through, Monica looks up and \r\nsees something that makes her pull back with fear...\r\n\r\nHER POV -\r\n\r\nA very sinister looking SECURITY EYE gazes down at her from the top of \r\nthe archway.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDon't worry. It's not activated.\r\n\r\nThey pass through and into...\r\n\r\nINT. ROOM IN THE BASE OF TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nwhich is filled with IMMENSE BRONZE SCULPTURES of voluptuous, scantily \r\nclad females in various poses of bondage. Monica reacts; these things \r\nare scary.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWho's the artist?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tMe.\r\n\r\nEXT. THE BARN/LAB - NIGHT\r\n\r\nThe Bowler, Spleen, Invisible Boy, and Doc Heller load up the Herkimer \r\nwith Heller's weaponry...\r\n\r\nas Mister Furious lies sprawled on the hillside... breathing in the \r\nnight air, contemplating a dandelion gone to seed, and listening to the \r\nsounds of the night. The Raja, Shoveler, and Sphinx, stand nearby, \r\nwatching, trying to figure out what's wrong with him. A whippoorwill \r\nis heard singing.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tListen. He's lonely... and he doesn't care who \r\n\t\tknows it.\r\n\r\nRaja and Shoveler share a bewildered look. The bird sings again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tWe're all the same really. Our songs, our \r\n\t\tdreams, our seeds are all just a brave attempt \r\n\t\tto live forever.\r\n\t\t\t(blows the dandelion seeds into the wind)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tHe is in love. His anger is gone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tOh no.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tGreat timing!\r\n\t\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tHas Monica called?\r\n\r\nINT. TOP OF THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova leads Monica into... a palatial room, filled with priceless \r\nobjects d'art, all of which reflect Casanova's dark psyche. A Munch \r\npainting. Mayan idols. Weird German furniture. A huge glass \r\nchandelier hovers over the room. A massive bronze sculpture of a wolf \r\n(done in the same style as the other sculptures) is perched in the \r\nbalcony. It seems to be howling out over the city which is seen in a \r\nspectacular view, spread out alonq the lakeshore below.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThis is where I come to... be alone.\r\n\r\nHe turns down the lights and quietly closes and locks the big door to \r\nthe room.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON MONICA, sensing her danger.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tOh, look at that view.\r\n\r\nShe moves out onto the balcony... as Casanova slips the gold chain from \r\naround his neck and follows her.\r\n\r\nINT. BARN/LAB - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes have gathered around Furious, who sits in a chair, getting \r\nthe third degree.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tSnap out of it!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tGet on to yourself!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\t\t(shouting right in his face)\r\n\t\tGET MAD!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tBut I just don't feel it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tHe's turned into a completely normal person!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNormal. What's normal? Does normal exist? \r\n\t\tAnd if it did, how would we know it?\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler slugs him, sending him sprawling.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tYou know, Eddie, that was really uncalled for.\r\n\r\nEXT. BALCONY ON FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - ON MONICA\r\n\r\ngazing out onto the city, as she senses Casanova slinking up behind \r\nher.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI'm chilly.\r\n\r\nShe turns, elegantly avoiding him, and moving back inside.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE BARN/LAB - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nSpleen holds up Furious' favorite sunglasses.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\tLook! Your favorite sunglasses!\r\n\t\t\t\t(snaps them in two)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tYour Roy Rogers coffee mug!\r\n\t\t\t(hurls it against the wall)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tYour Spiderman Pez dispenser!\r\n\t\t\t (breaks the head off it)\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tOkay, you win. I'm pissed off. I'm seriously \r\n\t\tpeeved.\r\n\r\nThe others groan with frustration.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nMonica moves nervously around the room as Casanova sprawls languorously \r\non the bed, toying with his gold chain.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tCome here.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI'm not that kind of girl.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThen why are you here?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tCuriosity.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t (with a smile)\r\n\t\tRemember the cat.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, he hears high heels in the hall. A key is put in the lock--\r\nCasanova leaps off the bed, grabs Monica and roughly shoves her into \r\nthe closet. He leaps back onto the bed, just as the door opens, and \r\nAnabel, dressed in a lab coat (and wearing high heels) enters. \r\nCasanova is completely relaxed, nonchalant.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tWhat are you doing all alone in the dark?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tFantasizing... about you.\r\n\r\nShe crosses the room to the wolf sculpture.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI thought you were done?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tOne last tweak.\r\n\r\nShe opens a secret panel on its back, REVEALNG a FLASHING HIGH TECH \r\nINTERIOR... and Monica, watching from the closet, realizes that she has \r\nfound the Psychostridulator.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE BARN/LAB - CONTINUOUS - CLOSE ON\r\n\r\na boom box... A CD jacket tells us that \"Kenny G.\" is playing...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tIf this doesn't do it, nothing will!\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS, a pair of headphones on his head. The music is so loud \r\nthat we can hear it even though it's being played only through the \r\nheadphones.\r\n\r\nON THE OTHERS, gathered around him, waiting to see if this will work. \r\nAnd then Furious begins to respond... as his face turns into a \r\ncontorted grimace.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tIt's working!\r\n\r\nFurious groans and writhes... The others are thrilled; they've done it!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tThis music is just SO BEAUTIFUL!\r\n\r\nHe starts to weep. The others give a collective groan of defeat.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - COHTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas Anabel works on the Psychostridulator, Monica looks at a clock... \r\nwhich reads almost eleven. Time is running out.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE BARN/LAB - CLOSE ON SHOVELER'S WRISTWATCH\r\n\r\nwhich also reads eleven.\r\n\r\n0N SHOVELER AND RAJA -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tIt's time.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWith or without him, we gotta go!\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER -\r\n\r\nas Anabel closes up the wolf... and starts to leave.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tOur guests are waiting.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI'll be down in a jiffy.\r\n\r\nShe goes out. Casanova listens as the sound of high heels fades away, \r\nthen he goes to the closet and lets Monica out.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tI'd better go.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tYou're a spy.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\t\t\t (offguard)\r\n\t\tWhat?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI saw him walk you home.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tWho?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tRoy.\r\n\r\nShe makes a sudden try for the door, but he blocks her way, a cold look \r\nin his eye that makes her step back in fear.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDon't be afraid... I never hit a lady...\r\n\r\nHe lets the gold chain drop loose in his hand, then starts coming for \r\nher, a sadistic grin on his face. This is the real Casanova.\r\n\r\nMonica pulls back, then reaches into her purse and takes out A CANNED \r\nTORNADO, which she holds out threateningly.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tStay away!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tOr you'll what? CAN ME?\r\n\r\nHe laughs dementedly as Monica pops open the can and A SWIRLING FUNNEL \r\nOF AIR SHOOTS OUT OF IT and ENGULFS Casanova, throwing him across the \r\nroom... Monica grabs the handset of a cordless phone and runs out the \r\ndoor.\r\n\r\nON CASANOVA, pulling himself together.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThat bitch!\r\n\r\nINT. CORRIDOR JUST OUTSIDE - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas Monica runs for it, dialing the phone on the fly...\r\n\r\nINT. TEE BARN/LAB - CONTINUOUS - ON THE PUONE\r\n\r\nringing... but no one is there...\r\n\r\nEXT. THE BARN/LAB - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes are climbing into the Herkimar, whose noisy idling engine \r\nobliterates the ringing of the phone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tBut she still might call!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAre you coming or not?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tI'll drive.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tNot a chance!\r\n\r\nHe shoves him in the back, closing the heavy steel door behind him.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS - ON MONICA\r\n\r\nhiding behind a large planter... listening to the phone ringing on the \r\nother end.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tCome on, guys... Pick up... \r\n\r\nSuddenly, we hear Casanova's voice on the line.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\tCASANOVA'S VOICE\r\n\t\tWhat's the matter...\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE TOWER ROOM - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova is listening in on another phone.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tNobody home?\r\n\r\nBACK TO M0NICA - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas she moves quickly down the hall.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler is at the wheel. The Raja sits in the passenger seat. \r\nThe others are in the back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHere we go!\r\n\r\nHe forces the stick into gear and the Herkimer lurches forward.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWe've got lift off!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMay the forks be with us!\r\n\r\nEXT. DOC HELLER'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas the Herkimer--backfiring, smoking, clanging--rumbles down the \r\ndriveway into action.\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE HERKINER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nShoveler tries to put the car in second gear, but it won't go. He yanks \r\nand pulls and struggles, until the stick comes off in his hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tFirst is good.\r\n\r\nINT. CORRIDOR IN FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova instructs three security guards.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI want her alive.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARDS\r\n\t\tYes, Mr. Frankenstein.\r\n\r\nCAMERA PANS UP the top of a staircase... where Monica is crouched, \r\nlistening.\r\n\r\nEXT. STREETS OF CHAMPION CITY - NIGHT\r\n\r\nVARIOUS SHOTS as the Herkimer rumbles and smokes down Champion's main \r\nstreet (in first gear) and the citizens step out of houses and bars to \r\nwatch this bizarre sight.\r\n\r\nON A LITTLE BOY AND HIS FATHER -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLITTLE BOY\r\n\t\tDaddy, what is that thing?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFATHER\r\n\t\tI don't know, son.\r\n\r\nA couple of GRIZZLED CHARACTERS stand in front of a bar.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDRUNK\r\n\t\tA Herkimer? Those yuppies will drive anything.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS AND THE OTHERS in the back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tAmigo, we need you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tJust GET MAD!\r\n\r\nFurious closes his eyes and tries, but it's hopeless.\r\n\r\nINT. V.I.P. LOUNGE IN FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nA sumptuous, hotel-like lounge. Anabel is holding court with all of \r\ntop crooks from the luncheon, charrning the pants off them... Casanova \r\nslithers up behind her.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tFellas, this is woman without whom I would have \r\n\t\tgone sane.\r\n\t\t\t\t(kisses her neck)\r\n\r\nEXT. FRONT GATE OF THE FRANKENSTEIN CENTER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nA pair of security guards (the same two who got gassed by the Spleen) \r\nare on duty, when they see... a strange looking vehicle chugging up the \r\nhill straight for them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 1\r\n\t\tWhat the hell is that?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD 2\r\n\t\tLooks like... a Ford Dumpster.\r\n\r\nThey have a good laugh at it, then hold up their hands for it to \r\nstop... But the Herkimer just rolls past them, hitting the iron gates \r\nand snapping them open as if they were made of match sticks.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARDS\r\n\t\tHEY!\r\n\r\nThey open fire.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nBullets are heard pinging off the Herk as THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD just \r\nahead we see the long stairway heading up to the front door of the art \r\ncenter.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tHang on!\r\n\r\nEXT. ON THE STAIRS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nSeveral more guards open fire, as the Herkimer hits the stairs and \r\nstarts bouncing up them...\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE LOUNGE - ON CASANOVA\r\n\r\nchecking his watch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tIt's showtime.\r\n\r\nBut then they all hear... the sound of gunfire.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tWhat's that?\r\n\r\nBACK ON THE STAIRS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas the Herkimer chugs and bounces... toward the entrance of the center.\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes get bounced all over the place.\r\n\r\nINT. JUST INSIDE THE CENTER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas guards close and bolt the big wooden doors to the art center.\r\n\r\nON A GUARD wearing a headset.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tGUARD\r\n\t\tMr. Frankenstein, we're being attacked.\r\n\r\nINT. SECURITY DESK - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova sits at a security console. Anabel, Tony P, and the top \r\ncrooks stand behind him, listening.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tBy whom?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tVOICE OF GUARD\r\n\t\tWe don't know!\r\n\r\nBACK ON THE STAIRS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas the Herkimer climbs to the top, then rams into the doors with a \r\nthud. But the doors hold.\r\n\r\nBACK ON THE VILLAINS -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tThey'll never get through those doors.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE FRONT DOOR - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nBut the plucky little Herkimer digs in its rear wheels and pushes \r\nagainst the doors like the Little Engine That Could...\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas our heroes encourage the Herk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tCome on, baby!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tDo it, big boy!\r\n\r\nON ITS WHEELS, grinding, chewing up the concrete... \r\n\r\nJUST INSIDE THE CENTER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas the Herkimer comes crunching through the big wooden doors of the \r\ncenter, scattering the guards.\r\n\r\nBACK INSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nour heroes cheer, pat the Herk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAtta, girl!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tAtta, boy!\r\n\r\nBACK TO CASANOVA -\r\n\r\nwatching on a security monitor\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tVOICE OF GUARD\r\n\t\tMr. Frankenstein, they're in!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWell kill them.\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE HALL - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe Herkimer drives into the main hall of the center as a small army of \r\nsecurity guards swarms in, guns blazing.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE SECURITY DESK - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova and the crooks watch the security monitor...\r\n\r\nINSIDE THE HERKIMER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nThe bullets sound like hailstones bouncing off the armor of the Herk as \r\nour heroes grimly prepare themselves for battle...The Sphinxs puts on \r\nhis mask... the Bowler unzips her bag...Doc Heller cocks his air \r\ncannon... Spleen and Invisible Boy load a bag with canned tornadoes... \r\nWhile Mister Furious watches anxiously.\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler drives intently, bullets splattering like bugs on the \r\nwindshield.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWhere am I going?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\t(pointing to an archway on the\r\n\t\t\t\tother side of the hall)\r\n\t\tThrough there!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tRight.\r\n\r\nBut suddenly something under the hood blows up; the engine gives a long \r\ngroan, and the Herkimer rolls to a dead stop...\r\n\r\nINSIDE/OUTSIDE THE HERIKINER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nRight in the middle, in the most exposed position of the main hall. \r\nMore guards arrive and open fire... An armored golf cart with a fifty \r\ncaliber machine gun mounted on it comes speeding into the hall, \r\nblasting the Herk...\r\n\r\nInside, the sound of the big bullets is deafening as Shoveler tries to \r\nrestart the engine.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tNo good! She's dead!\r\n\r\nON CASANOVA AND THE CROOKS, watching the monitor and laughing as \r\nbullets pulverize the Herk.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tSpam in a can!\r\n\r\nThe crooks laugh.\r\n\r\nButsuddenly, the Herkimer's door is thrown open, revealing our heroes--\r\nholding down Doc Heller, his air cannon at the ready. He fires--there \r\nis a WHOOMPH of air--and the mounted gun and a dozen guards are sent \r\ntumbling...\r\n\r\nSECURITY DESK - CONTINUOUS - ON CASANOVA AND THE OTHERS\r\n\r\nwatching, sobered.\r\n\r\nBACK IN THE MAIN HALL - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas our heroes come charging out of the Herkimer, using their various \r\nskills to blow through the surprised guards. Mr. Furious comes out \r\nlast, not quite sure what to do with himself.\r\n\r\nBut suddenly, a withering barrage of machine gun fire is being laid \r\ndown on them by three guards firing tommy guns from a balcony \r\noverlooking the floor. Bullets splatter all around them--and several \r\nunlucky guards are hit--but our heroes dive for cover. The Raja tries \r\nto get off a fork, but the firing is too intense. Our heroes are \r\npinned down.\r\n\r\nON MR. FURIOUS as he sees... the bag of canned tornadoes. He's got no \r\nsuperpowers, and he's scared to death, but he grabs a canned tornado.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tCover me!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWith what?\r\n\r\nBullets dancing all around him, Furious runs a desperate (but \r\nimpressive) zig-zag pattern across the floor... He performs a wild \r\nsomersault, comes up on his feet, pops open the can, and executes a \r\nperfect jump shot, lobbing it right into the balcony. The tornado \r\nfunnels out, and the guards are sent flying.\r\n\r\nON CASANOVA AND THE TOP CROOKS watching...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER 1\r\n\t\tWho are those guys?\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON CASANOVA, who knows who they are.\r\n\r\nWHILE BACK IN THE HALL our heroes rally around a shaken Mr. Furious.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNot bad for a normal guy!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPHINX\r\n\t\tAmigos!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tDo or die!\r\n\r\nEXT. COURTYARD - A MOMENT LATER - ANGLE ON\r\n\r\nthe security eye watching...\r\n\r\nas the panicking security guards retreat under it into the main tower.\r\n\r\nBACK TO CASANOVA -\r\n\r\nas he types something into the security computer...\r\n\r\nON THE SCREEN a computerized image of the eye appears. Casanova \r\nhighlights the word \"Activate\" and then presses \"Enter\".\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE COURTYARD - ON THE EYE\r\n\r\nas it comes to glowing, sinister life...\r\n\r\nA hapless guard retreats under the arch--the Eye instantly focuses on \r\nhim, and he is hit by a dozen nasty looking laser beams... that SIZZLE \r\nHIM...\r\n\r\nA moment later our heroes arrive at the arch. Furious is about to run \r\nthrough, but Doc Heller holds him back.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tWait! Look!\r\n\r\nHe points to... a man shaped pile of charcoal, all that remains of the \r\nunfortunate guard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tLaser eye... and it's a humdinger.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tNo problem.\r\n\r\nThe Raja takes out a butter knife, aims, and hurls it straight at the \r\neye, but laser beams intercept the knife and instantly melt it into... \r\na formless blob of silver.\r\n\r\nBACK TO CASANOVA AND THE TOP CROOKS -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tWe'll take care of these clowns.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER 2\r\n\t\tPiece a cake.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBONE HEAD LEADER\r\n\t\tNo sweat.\r\n\r\nCORRIDOR - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nas Tony P, the top crooks, and the Disco Boys march en masse TOWARD THE \r\nCAMAERA... They are an ugly, formidable looking bunch.\r\n\r\nEXT. COURTYARD - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOur heroes are blocked by the eye.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tDoc, there's got to be a way.\r\n\r\nBut the Doc is stymied... Suddenly they hear a woman's voice calling \r\ndown to them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA'S VOICE\r\n\t\tIt's up here! It's up here!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (looks up)\r\n\t\tMonica!\r\n\r\nEXT. TOP OF THE FRANKENSTEIN TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nMonica leans over the edge of the balcony, the wolf sculpture looming \r\nover her, shouting down at them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tROY! THE PSYCHO THING IS--!\r\n\r\nBut strong hands suddenly grab her. It's Casanova.\r\n\r\nBACK TO FURIOUS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas high above he hears Monica scream.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE BALCONY - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova, hand held tightly across Monica's mouth, shouts down \r\ntauntingly to Furious.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThanks, Roy! She's just my type. You can have \r\n\t\ther back... when I'm done!\r\n\r\nBACK T0 FURIOUS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas he hears Casanova's evil laugh and Monica's scream. He is desperate \r\nto find a way up, but the wall is completely sheer. He feels helpless-\r\nfrantic, near tears...\r\n\r\nFLASH TO the terrified little boy trapped in the back of his p8arents' \r\ncar, crying, pounding on the windows...\r\n\r\nAnd then... Mr. Furious' hands clench into fists--his hair stands up--\r\nand his face turns into a mask of primordial rage. His button has \r\nfinally been pressed. Be's MAD! He reaches up as high as he can...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON HIS HAND -\r\n\r\nas his fingers literally dig into the concrete of the wall... and he \r\npulls himself up.\r\n\r\nBACK AT THE TOP 0F THE TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova throws Monica onto the bed, puts his hands on her throat and \r\nstrangles her as she thrashes helplessly against his immense strength.\r\n\r\nBACK TO FURIOUS -\r\n\r\nFifty feet up and climbing. He pulls himself up, one hand, then \r\nanother, digging in his fingernails, catchng his toes on whatever tiny \r\ncracks he can find... as the others gaze up at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tHELLER\r\n\t\tHe'll never make it.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tThink positive.\r\n\r\nMeanwhile, Invisible Boy stands staring at the security eye, a look of \r\nfierce determination on his face. This is his moment.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(to himself)\r\n\t\tI can do it.\r\n\r\nHe takes a deep breath, closes his eyes, and concentrates...\r\n\r\nON FURIOUS as the fingers of one hand lose their grip and a toehold \r\ngives way... For a desperate moment, Furious is dangling off the wall \r\nby the tips of the fingers of one hand. Only his incredible rage keeps \r\nhis fingertips taut.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, there is a flash of silver, and a large cake fork embeds in \r\nthe concrete not far from his head. Furious grabs hold of it, and \r\nthrows a grateful look down to the Raja...\r\n\r\nWho salaams up at him...\r\n\r\nAs Invisible Boy, eyes closed in concentration, walks very slowly, \r\nhands at his sides, in an almost Egyptian pose... toward the eye... \r\nwhich stares down mercilessly, waiting for its next victim...\r\n\r\nwe notice that Invisible Boy has become... just slightly transparent.\r\n\r\nAT THE TOP OF THE TOWER - CONTINUOUS - ON CASANOVA\r\n\r\na look of pleasure on his face as he strangles Monica. Her resistance \r\nfades. Her hands fall away. She is pale, beautiful, almost gone, a \r\npicture of exquisite death.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\t\t\t (admiring her)\r\n\t\tSome girls just know how to die.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, we hear someone cursing Casanova in Russian. He turns and \r\nsees... Anabel standing there, pistol in hand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\tYou two timing psychotic bastard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDarling, you've got the wrong idea.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tANABEL\r\n\t\t\t\t(aiming at his heart)\r\n\t\tDo I?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tI was only strangling her... I've killed hundreds of women. \r\n\t\tIt doesn't mean a thing.\r\n\t\t\t\t(moving toward her, turning on\r\n\t\t\t\tthat old Frankenstein Charm)\r\n\t\tPootchkie, you're over-reacting. This is our \r\n\t\tnight. It's what we've lied for... cheated \r\n\t\tfor... murdered for. She's just a plaything, a \r\n\t\ttrifle... You're the only woman who's ever \r\n\t\tmeant anything to me. I adore you. I worship \r\n\t\tyou. I want to make you my bride.\r\n\r\nShe succumbs to his charms, and he gently takes the pistol out of her \r\nhand.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tThere's just one thing...\r\n\t\t\t\t(with a psychotic smile)\r\n\t\tI don't need you anymore.\r\n\r\nA look of terror comes across her face as she sees the murder in his \r\neyes.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tDon't worry, Darling. I never hit a lady.\r\n\r\nEXT. ON THE WALL - A MOMENT LATER - ON FURIOUS\r\n\r\nstill climbing as he hears a scream, looks up... and sees Anabel go \r\nplummeting past him.\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES down below.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHeads up!\r\n\r\nCAMERA HOLDS ON OUR HEROES, wincing as Anabel hits with an ugly thud.\r\n\r\nSuddenly they hear Invisible Boy calling to them.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tGuys, I did it! I did it! I'm invisible!\r\n\r\nThey all turn and see... Invisible Boy, totally visible, but standing \r\non the other side of the arch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tCan you see me?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tALL\r\n\t\tYes!\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tNuts.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tKid, turn that thing off!\r\n\r\nInvisible Boy turns and sees... a computer screen built into the wall \r\n(with the same image of the eye on it that was on Casanova's computer), \r\nbut he doesn't have a clue how to turn it off. Suddenly, he hears \r\nrunning feet, turns and sees...\r\n\r\nThe top crooks and the Disco Boys rushing towards him through the giant \r\nsculptures. He gets an idea... and stands right in front of the \r\ncomputer screen.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tHEY! CREEPS!\r\n\r\nHe makes a face at them--and a dozen guns are instantly fired at him. \r\nHe jumps clear behind a pillar--as the bullets smash into the wall... \r\none of them demolishing the computer screen.\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON THE EYE -\r\n\r\nas it goes dead.\r\n\r\nON INVISIBLE BOY, hiding behind the pillar... realizing he's been shot \r\nin the shoulder.\r\n\r\nBACK ON OUR HEROES -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThis is it! DO OR DIE!\r\n\r\nThe villains form a line, bristling with pistols... as our heroes, led \r\nby Sphinx, Shoveler, and Bowler come running through the arch. The \r\nthreesome go shoulder to shoulder (with our other heroes right behind \r\nthem) as the villains open fire, laying down a deadly fusillade...\r\n\r\nON SHOVELER, BOWLER, AND SPHINX, standing together, deflecting their \r\nbullets with shovel, bowling ball, and machete... (as they practiced \r\nwith pebbles at the farm)... with the Raja right behind them, hurling \r\nsilverware...\r\n\r\nON THE VILLAINS, rapid firing... but their own bullets ricochet back \r\ninto them, dropping them... They start to fall back.\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE TOP OF THE TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nCasanova is about to finish Monica.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tAnd the light goes out...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS (0.S.)\r\n\t\tFrankenstein!\r\n\r\nCasanova turns and sees... Furious, standing on the balcony.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tRoy... What took you so long?\r\n\r\nFurious starts at Casanova, who aims Anabel's pistol at him. Furious \r\nhesitates.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tLet me guess... Bullets don't hurt you.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tThey hurt... BUT THEY DON'T STOP ME!\r\n\r\nFurious lunges at Casanova--who gets off a shot before Furious grabs \r\nthe gun out of his hand. Casanova ducks clear. Furious tosses the \r\npistol away... then realizes he's bleeding from a shoulder wound.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tSmarts, doesn't it?... Shall we dance?\r\n\r\nHe turns on his stereo and the sound of DISCO MUSIC fills the air...\r\n\r\nINTERCUT BETWEEN THE TWO FIGHTS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nDownstairs, the villains have regrouped.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tLet's rush 'em!\r\n\r\nThey charge en mass at our heroes... who are waiting for them... \r\npinching their noses closed, the Spleen bent over at their forefront...\r\n\r\nWhile Casanova dances around Furious like a cat... Furious, fighting \r\nthe pain of his bullet wound, lunges at him, and Casanova neatly \r\nsidesteps him...\r\n\r\nThe crooks and Disco Boys fall back, gasping, choking in the noxious \r\nfumes...\r\n\r\nAs Casanova attacks...\r\n\r\nAdvancing shoulder to shoulder, fighting as a team, our heroes wield \r\nmachete, fork, shovel, bowling ball, and canned tornado... forcing the \r\nvillains back...\r\n\r\nCasanova comes at Furious relentlessly, kicking and spinning... and \r\nFurious gets the worst of it.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, a squad of Disco Boys comes charging at our heroes from the \r\nflank... but Doc Heller turns to face them, shrinker spray held Rambo-\r\nstyle on his hip. He lets them have it, blasting them with a DENSE \r\nBLUE SPRAY...\r\n\r\nWhen the spray clears, the D Boys lie squirming on the floor, prisoners \r\nin their now child sized disco suits...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDISCO BOYS\r\n\t\tHelp!... Get me out of this!\r\n\t\t\t\t (Etc.)\r\n\r\nUpstairs, Casanova pummels Furious...\r\n\r\nWhile, downstairs, the Shoveler dispatches the Elvis Brothers with some \r\nnifty shovel work... But suddenly, the Bland Boys, pistols blazing, are \r\nadvancing on him, forcing him back against the base of a sculpture. \r\nBut the Raja suddenly leaps up onto the sculpture.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA (0.S.)\r\n\t\tGentlemen!\r\n\r\nThe Bland Boys look up and see... the Raja, both hands filled with \r\nsilverware... which he HURLS...\r\n\r\nA beat later the Bland Boys, bristling with forks and grapefruit \r\nspoons, run screaming through the sculptures... as Tony P, pistol in \r\nhand, skulks out from behind a sculpture and spots... the Bowler.\r\n\r\nUpstairs, Furious goes flying against a wall...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tRoy, you're making this too easy.\r\n\r\nAs Tony P takes a careful bead on the Bowler.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tTONY P\r\n\t\tSay hello to Daddy for me!\r\n\r\nHe opens fire, but she goes instantly into her ball svinging frenzy... \r\nHe fires, missing--she's too fast to keep a bead on... Finally, his gun \r\nclicks empty. She turns and faces him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\t\t\t (grimly)\r\n\t\tDaddy says hello.\r\n\r\nShe HURLS the ball at him--like a fiery softball pitch.\r\n\r\nBALL'S POV -\r\n\r\ngoing straight for Tony P's SCREAMING head...\r\n\r\nON THE BOWLER, watching--as Tony's scream is cut short by a gruesose \r\nthud.\r\n\r\nBack upstairs Casanova cornmes at Furious again... but Furious ducks \r\nthe kick, pops back up and smashes Casanova with his good arm... \r\nsending him flying across the room... Casanova recovers.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tLet's change the tune.\r\n\r\nHe reaches into his pocket and takes out the remote device (that Anabel \r\nused at the luncheon). He presses a button...\r\n\r\nON THE WOLF SCULPTURE as the jaws open, its eyes glow red... and the \r\ndreadful sound of the Psychostridulator grinds up and FILLS THE NIGHT \r\nAIR LIKE A SIREN.\r\n\r\nDownstairs, the foul noise fills the room and our heroes and the \r\nvillains all go into a full blown psychotic episode... The villains \r\nstart shooting and stabbing each other.\r\n\r\nSERIES OF SHOTS - AROUND THE CITY - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nOn Main Street cars slam into each other. Pedestrians start screaming \r\nand fightinq... A man and his dog snarl and snap at each other...\r\n\r\nThe Customers at the Lakeside Diner go insane, hurling plates and \r\nfood...\r\n\r\nAt the Shoveler's house the kids turn psycho in front of the \r\ntelevision...\r\n\r\nANGLE ON A TYPICAL SUBURBAN NEIGHBORHOOD -\r\n\r\nas the sounds of screaming and smashing dishes and furniture can be \r\nheard coming from all the houses...\r\n\r\nLONG ANGLE OF CHAMPION CITY -\r\n\r\nas a din of collective insanity rises up from the city...\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE TOP OF THE TOWER - CONTINUOUS - ON CASANOVA\r\n\r\nin full psychotic ecstasy...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tCASANOVA\r\n\t\tWHAT A RUSH!\r\n\t\t\t(tosses the remote off the balcony)\r\n\r\nON MONICA, still motionless on the bed...\r\n\r\nCasanova and Furious collide in the center of the room and grapple in a \r\ncontest of psychotically enhanced superhuman strength... Casanova gets \r\nhis hands around Furious's throat and crushes it... Furious drops to \r\nhis knees, and Casanova thinks he's got him. But Furious, grimacing \r\nwith rage, looks him right in the eye.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\t\t\t (raspy voiced)\r\n\t\tIs... that... all you got?\r\n\r\nFurious grabs Casanova's wrists... and crushes them. Casanova howls \r\nwith pain, loses his grip. Furious slugs him, again and again... then \r\nhe grabs Casanova by the belt, swings him around, and HURLS him into \r\nthe air...\r\n\r\nCasanova CRASHES into the huge crystal chandelier--there is an \r\nexplosion of crystal and glass. Furious averts his eyes as cut glass \r\nrains down all around him... then he looks up and sees...\r\n\r\nCasanova's gold chain has hooked onto a fixture of the chandelier. \r\nCasanova kicks and flails... as he is hanged by the neck on his own \r\ngold chain...\r\n\r\nFurious moves to the wolf sculpture. Be PLUNGES HIS HAND through its \r\nbronze casing, and RIPS OUT the heart of the Psychostridulator, a \r\nflashing football sized device that gives off an unamplifjed, but \r\nhigher pitched and more irritating sound...\r\n\r\nFurious HURLS the device hard against the floor, and it smashes into a \r\nthousand pieces...\r\n\r\nCLOSE ON ONE OF THE PIECES -\r\n\r\nIn insect sized device that gives off an even higher pitched, even more \r\ndisorienting sound. This is the very nerve center of the \r\nPsychostridulator...\r\n\r\nFurious lifts his foot and crushes it hard under his heel...\r\n\r\nSILENCE...\r\n\r\nFurious drops to his knees, wounded, exhausted... He looks up... at \r\nCasanova, who dangles lifelessly off the chandelier...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tNice dancing with you.\r\n\r\nSERIES OF SHOTS - VARIOUS LOCATIONS - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nas our other heroes return to their senses amidst the vanquished \r\ncrooks... the traumatized reunants of whom run for it. Things also \r\nreturn to normal...\r\n\r\nOn the street...\r\n\r\nAt the Lakeside Diner...\r\n\r\nAnd at the Shoveler's house...\r\n\r\nBACK TO THE TOP OF THE TOWER - CONTINUOUS\r\n\r\nFurious moves to the bed, where Monica lies motionless and pale...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tMonica...\r\n\r\nHe touches her face, her eyes open, and she looks at him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\tYou're beautiful when you're angry.\r\n\r\nHe takes her tenderly in his arm... as the Raja, the Shoveler and the \r\nothers rush into the room and see... Furious and Monica embracing.\r\n\r\nEXT. OUTSIDE THE FRANKENSTEIN CENTER - A LITTLE LATER\r\n\r\nPolice cars and news vans arrive... as our heroes, battered, wounded, \r\nbut victorious walk proudly down the long stairs...\r\n\r\nFurious and Monica hold each other up. Wounded Invisible Boy has his \r\narm around the Spleen... while policemen and news people run up the \r\nstairs past them into the center, ignoring them as always...\r\n\r\nBut this time our heroes could care less. They are superheroes, and \r\nthey don't give a damn who knows it.\r\n\r\nINT. THE RAJA'S HOUSE - NIGHT\r\n\r\nas the Raja opens the door and enters...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tMama!\r\n\r\nShe is there, waiting up for him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tI'm home.\r\n\r\nThey embrace.\r\n\r\nINT. SHOVELER'S DOUSE - NIGHT - CLOSE ON A TV SCREEN\r\n\r\nDon Stouffer is reporting.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDON\r\n\t\tFew details have emerged...\r\n\r\nON THE SHOVELER'S KIDS, on the couch, still rattled by their psychotic \r\nepisode, glued to the TV -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDON (0.S.)\r\n\t\t...but the Dawn Patrol got this exclusive \r\n\t\tinterview vith two of the suspects.\r\n\r\nON THE TV -\r\n\r\nDawn Wong interviews the battered, handcuffed Elvis Brothers as they \r\nare led away...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER I\r\n\t\tI don't know who those guys were--but I never \r\n\t\twant to see 'em again.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER 2\r\n\t\tEspecially that big dude with the shovel...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tELVIS BROTHER 1\r\n\t\t\t\t\t (near tears)\r\n\t\tHe was the worst!\r\n\r\nON THE KIDS' COLLECTIVE REACTION as they realize who it was... and then \r\nthey hear the front door open...\r\n\r\nIn the front hall the Shoveler enters wearily; his shoulder hurts, his \r\nback is killing him... as his kids come running to him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tKIDS\r\n\t\tDad!... Dad!... You okay?... You hurt?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\t\t (shocked by this welcome)\r\n\t\tI'm okay--I'm all right.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tEDDIE JR.\r\n\t\tLean on me, Dad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tLENORE\r\n\t\tI'll hold your shovel, Dad.\r\n\r\nThey lead him back into the living room, and give him the prime spot on \r\nthe couch.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBUTCH\r\n\t\tYou want a soda, Dad?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\t\t\t\t(stunned)\r\n\t\tOkay.\r\n\r\nHe runs to get it as Eddie Jr. slides a footstool under his feet and \r\nTracy puts a pillow behind his back. Roland, the little one, cuddles \r\nup next to him, puts his arm around him.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tROLAND\r\n\t\tNice work. Dad.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tThanks, Roland.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tROLAND\r\n\t\tYou really are a superhero, aren't you?\r\n\r\nThe Shoveler nods. A few minutes later... The Shoveler sits on the \r\ncouch, feet up, soda in hand. The television is off. His kids all \r\nhuddled around him, hanging on his every word.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tAnd that's when the engine blew up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tKIDS\r\n\t\tWhoa...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBUTCH\r\n\t\tWhat did you do?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWell...\r\n\r\nON LUCILLE as she comes in and sees... her husband surrounded by his \r\nkids, a happy man at last.\r\n\r\nEXT. LAKESIDE DINER - THE NEXT NIGHT - ESTABLISHING\r\n\r\nINT. THE DINER - CONTINUOUS - ON THE SPLEEN\r\n\r\nsitting between the Bowler and a bandaged Invisible Boy. The Bowler has \r\nher arm chummily around the Spleen's shoulder. The Spleen finally has \r\nreal friends. Doc Heller discusses the art of fork throwing with the \r\nRaja as the Shoveler listens in. The Sphinx sits at the end of the \r\ntable, silent.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDOC HELLER\r\n\t\tSo you're never actually conscious of range or \r\n\t\ttrajectory?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tHeck no. I just chuck 'em.\r\n\r\nMonica (in her waitress outfit) sits close to a bandaged Mister \r\nFurious.\r\n\r\nON THE TV -\r\n\r\nDawn Wong reports.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tDAWN\r\n\t\tIt's been twenty-four hours since the deadly \r\n\t\tpsycho-sonic attack and bloody shoot-out that \r\n\t\tleft Casanova Frankenstein and dozen of the \r\n\t\tcity's top hoodlums dead... But tonight the \r\n\t\tquestion remains... Who were these heroic \r\n\t\tmystery men who saved our city?...\r\n\r\nON OUR HEROES -\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tCould have been anybody.\r\n\r\nThey laugh.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tWait a minute... That's it. That's our name. \r\n\t\tWe're... the Mystery Men.\r\n\r\nThey all like it, except for the Bowler.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tHey, do I look like a Man?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tWell we can't call ourselves the Mystery People.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSPLEEN\r\n\t\t\t(singing, ala \"Macho Man\")\r\n\t\tMystery, Mystery Man... I want to be a Mystery \r\n\t\tMan...\r\n\r\n\t\t \t\t SHOVELER & RAJA\r\n\t\tShut up.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tBOWLER\r\n\t\tEat your mustard.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tIt doesn't matter what we call ourselves. We \r\n\t\tknow who we are.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\tYes, Obie-wan.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tINVISIBLE BOY\r\n\t\tHey... he's gone.\r\n\r\nThe others see... that the Sphinx's chair is empty. Raja spots a \r\ncrumpled napkin on the table, opens it up, and reads.\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tRAJA\r\n\t\t\"Until you need me again... Adios.\"\r\n\r\nA silence... Reactions from our heroes as they realize that the Sphinx \r\nis gone...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tSHOVELER\r\n\t\tI miss him already.\r\n\r\nSuddenly, somewhere in the night, a burst of gunfire and screams are \r\nheard. THE FINAL MUSIC BEGINS...\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tFURIOUS\r\n\t\tAmigos, duty calls.\r\n\r\nThe Mystery Men wolf their burgers, then stand and start for the \r\nstreet...\r\n\r\nAs Monica watches them leave, a PATRON asks her:\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tPATRON\r\n\t\tMiss... who are those guys?\r\n\r\n\t\t\t\t\tMONICA\r\n\t\t\t\t(after a moment)\r\n\t\tI don't know.\r\n\r\nJUST OUTSIDE THE DINER - A MOMENT LATER\r\n\r\nHEROIC GROUP SHOT as the Mystery Men merch down the middle of street, \r\ntoward the sound of the gunfire... and into the night.\r\n\r\nTHEME AND CREDITS...\r\n\r\nTHE END\r\n\r\n"
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https://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/mystery_men_6_6_97.html
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